Sure there are plenty of things in life that are cool and sexy. We can't help but b e drawn to certain things that we think are hip or will make us look better in the eyes of the world. Sometimes it's okay to indulge in what's trendy but we really need to take a step back and look at the things and the people we are putting on a pedestal. More often than not we're caught up in the fantasy and the real life effect is toxic.
Redditor u/uh_vika wanted everyone to get smart about a few things in life by asking.... What is something people need to stop romanticizing?
Practice Makes Perfect....
GiphyFirst time sex. sometimes it doesn't go well, and that is ok. deathiswaitingforme
This is true. For some people it doesn't. For me it did so much I had to stop, which led to him saying we were "basically still virgins" later and making me realize I made a very poor choice for my first. People need to understand that the first time can be like sitting on a knife or completely fine, or anywhere in between. littlekellilee
Hit Snooze....
Lack of sleep. hydrofeuille
Yeah. The aviation industry and Air Forces around the world mandate crew rest time because people were dying from accidents caused at least partly by lack of sleep, but some people make it a point of pride to drive an unsafe amount of hours without rest. judgingyouquietly
Disease is NOT funny....
Bipolar Disorder is not chic. ogrefoot87
This this this this this. Having out of control emotions, both good and bad, is torturous. You know they're not realistic but you can't help it. Feeling empty and hopeless isn't glamorous. Being manic and hyperactive isn't fun. It's draining. It's awful, and the havoc makes the people around you miserable too.
Not. Fun. lunayoshi
You're just plain annoying.....
Being OCD... there's a difference between being "neat and particular and a clean freak," and having crippling/unwanted thoughts, behaviors and actions. In one case you're just extremely anal. The other, more serious case, you have a genuine mental health diagnosis. ericasin
How much for the divorce?
GiphyRidiculously expensive weddings. Average cost of a wedding in my state is around $60,000. A lot of people take out loans and debt for one day of living way outside their means. jonny970
Working to Death!
Living those "overly stressed lifestyles." Especially in college. Congratulations on your pulling the sixth full-nighter to cram even more for your finals, but I'd rather get a decent night's sleep and study with a clear brain. to_the_tenth_power
It's not Love!
Abusive relationships. If you're constantly arguing about anything and everything, calling each other names, causing drama for the sake of it, or guilt tripping each other to do what you want then you're not good together. Both or only one of you doing this is not okay and not cute. It's abuse.
Also, mental illness and faking it for attention. Cyanide_Kitty_101
Not so Sexy afterall...
Falling in love with a bad boy and hoping he'll change his ways for you. arttyfidas
It's the equivalent of every guy who thinks he can make some totally uninterested woman fall in love with him. DConstructed
Not a love connection...
GiphySerial Killers. It's important to educate people about them, but the people who talk about wanting to f**k them online are crazy. pimpmywalrus
NC-17
Child beauty pageants. Wrong_Answer_Willie
Children dressing up like adults, in general.
Back in 2015, there was a 10 year old girl who was dressed up in sleek dresses and heavy makeup with lots of mascara, and was posed very sexually for Vogue magazine. She had her hair up, wore stiletto heels, and lots of flashy diamond jewelry. If you look it up, she looks like a 20-something year old woman.
And now there's those two 11 year old boys doing drag, one of them stripping in bars and in parades, and posing with convicted felons. The other one did a photo shoot posing nude with an adult queen. It disturbs me that everyone pretends these literal children are adults. They're not adults. JackEaston
Out of Tune.
Drug abuse as a way to deal with mental health in rap. 7evin7
As an alcoholic alcoholism 100% should not be romanticized. That said, full blown insomnia is absolutely hellish and I do sympathize with those so desperate to get some kind of sleep, even the alcohol induced shitty kind, that they turn to drink. superfurrykylos
Memories....
GiphyI've learnt that Nostalgia is toxic. You only remember the good parts. You forget why you chose to get out. amitnagpal1985
Is there an antonym for nostalgia? Not for being positive about the future, but for only remembering bad stuff? UnculturedLout
Objection!
Don't romanticize toxic relationships. Or relationships of any kind that don't benefit either of the parties. Both people in a relationship need to be comfortable and happy with one another— otherwise it's a s**t show. Shyn_exe
Just Sad.
Depression and suicide. Its not charming, its not poetic. It sucks and is not cool. Danni_dude23
There is this secret on "post secret" where a teacher wrote a poem that starts with "f**k the poets of the past, my friend. There are no beautiful suicides. Just cold corpses with crap in their pants and the end of all gifts." These lines need to be read by anyone who thinks Suicide is in any way a cool thing or a glamorous thing. BetsyZZZ
Be Alone.
Being overly busy/committing to everything someone asks for.
People who have things/activities every night and weekend stress me out.
Be at peace, just learn to be at peace. hisspaceprincess
Rocky is not a life goal.
Fighting... it's not cool getting almost killed and left with several inner bleedings. JonathanTheZero
This. Everyone acts like a concussion is a normal thing, and shouldn't be taken seriously. My best friend hit her head a week ago. When she woke up, she asked who I was. I'm not sure she'll ever get her memories back fully, and her teachers don't seem to believe her, because it's "just" a concussion. myriidabit
You're Mine!
Possessive behavior.
No, it's not cute when your SO gets jealous because of everyone that looks at you; it's fricking sick. I mean, honestly, if you don't trust me enough to know I would not cheat on you we should see other people. goldfishhate
Stay Calm.
Anxiety. I'm sure someone else has already said this but it can be said again. People on the internet seem to think it's some kind of "trend" to have anxiety and panic attacks and they throw terms around like it's nothing. Anxiety isn't a joke and it isn't something people should claim to have without any reason other than that they feel stressed out. (Also, I totally understand that there are plenty of people on the internet who really do have anxiety, but I've seen my fair share of people who are very clearly faking it). shiinymoth
Answer the Call...
GiphyWAR! caler733
I have seen so many advertisements for the US military lately. They all look like Call of Duty commercials. flpacsnr
Curious to hear examples of these, Redditor lilac_cup asked:
"Which tv series has aged like milk?"
The handling of these controversial TV story lines seem so careless in retrospect.
Addressing Child Abuse
"The very first episode of Hill Street Blues has two cops breaking up a domestic disturbance caused by a woman finding her man f'king her 15yo daughter. The man is told not to be sh**ty, the woman is told to put out more and the child is told not to be so tempting. Then the cops leave, patting themselves on the back for a job well done."
– kifferella
The Teacher's Secret Relationship
"Pretty Little Liars. I think even at the time, the teacher dating his 16 year old student storyline was considered creepy, but in 2022 it’s honestly unbelievable that was ever portrayed in any kind of positive light. Also that her parents didn’t immediately just report him to the police."
– ColdFIREBaker
Forbidden Attraction
"Not the whole series but Ally McBeal. In one episode Ally found out her bf is bi and her reason breaking up with him was she afraid that one day her bf would be attracted to their son."
– thrussie
These reality shows would never fly in a "woke" world.
Racist Cringe
"There was a reality show on Fox called 'Black. White.' Where they put a white family in blackface and a black family in whiteface."
"Just reading about it, it turns out the white family wasn't even a real family. They were unrelated actors."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black._White.
– MichaelJAwesome
Extreme Makeover
"Extreme makeover. I remember watching this show as a kid and being like oh wow they’re fixing all these ugly people with plastic surgery and making them happy. I just think that caused a whole generation to think they could change their body with money. Show lasted like 4 seasons. Couldn’t imagine that show today."
– thenightshifters
Teen Exploitation
"Secret life of an American teenager."
"Just what…."
– carlirodriguez8
A Critique
"My god this show was terrible. My wife’s sister was into it and we ended up watching a lot of it when we were dating. I think they tried to make the banter like Gilmore Girls, but it ended up being the characters repeating their current plots and arcs over and over. I don’t remember the characters at all, but the main character was such a horrible person, and the audience is supposed to root for her."
"The main things I remember about it were the religious girl claiming she killed her dad by having sex with her boyfriend, and apparently you go to Bologna to get bjs."
– MachFighterG
So-Called Expert
"You Are What You Eat."
"Host Gillian McKeith (or to use her full medical title, Gillian McKeith) was an absolute quack with an online medical qualification from a Mickey Mouse university. She pretended to be a scientist by being recorded standing around in a lab wearing a white coat, spouted unscientific nonsense that anyone who had done a GCSE in science could see through, and was obsessed with getting people to shit in Tupperware boxes."
"It got cancelled after the final series when you had to have her move in with you. In the last few years she popped up again as a prominent anti-vaxxer once COVID vaccines became available."
– MattBD
These pageant shows glorifying good looks and talent would never be greenlit today.
Performing Pressure
"Dance moms- used to be entertaining, now all I can see is the psychological effects it must’ve had on those girls."
– KE789
"Americas Next Top Model has to be #1."
"From all the behind the scenes sh*t that went on in production to what the show actually shows. It’s all just horrendous."
– Nickster1619
From Ugly To Beautiful
"The Swan, was 2 women who are considered 'ugly ducklings' participating in a pageant against each other after undergoing a three-month transformative process aka having heaps of plastic surgery."
– twozedzed
Psychological Downer
"Right?! How were they allowed to do so many procedures in such a short time while completely isolating these women from their families? Making them diet and exercise while healing from a tummy tuck, breast implants, and veneers?! The 'therapy' sessions were a joke and were just for show while these poor women with low self esteem were preyed upon for entertainment. Just out of a safety and medical prospective…wow."
– Snoo-8746
Judging The Reflection
"Didn't they also not allow the contestants/patients to have mirrors the whole time so they were surprised when they saw themselves? Psychologically having massive changes like that and it being sudden is extremely bad for your brain, you can end up rejecting the reflection because it's not 'you.'"
– Delouest
As audiences evolve, so does the writing and development of all forms of entertainment.
But because the changes are gradual, it is jarring when looking back and noticing how offensive and isolating some of these shows can be.
Times sure have changed in the world of entertainment–mostly for the better.
Curious to hear experiences from strangers online, Redditor WallStreetDoesntBet asked:
"People who moved out of the parent’s house before 30, how?"
Most people can't afford to live on their own.
Roommate Is Key
"yeah this exactly. I've never lived by myself, was roommates until I got a serious girlfriend and now fiance. There's exactly 0% chance of me being in the same position I'm in financially if I had been paying full rent all those years."
– lick_me_where_I_fart
Not A Care In The World
"I was 17, we had 4 of us in a ghetto 2bd apt (bunkbeds) we had a beer bong on a lanyard screwed to the ceiling. We'd have keggers, party's every weekend and always had randoms crashing on the floor. Could barely afford to feed myself and pay bills but still not a worry in the world and it was the best time of my life."
– ApprehensiveAd6006
One inconvenience shared by many was the sacrifice of a good, home-cooked meal.
Change Of Scenery
"Just needed a little R&R."
"Roommates and Ramen."
– SudoPuff
The "Wild" Years
"This, lol. I was kicked out at 16 and after couch-surfing for a few months I moved into a studio apartment with 4 other people."
"When I say we were poor, I mean poor - most of us didn’t have jobs. I lived off the worst of the worst food. Knockoff ramen. Dollar store canned veg. Rice and terrible year old pasta."
"It was a wild few years."
– Vetiversailles
Rice For Life
"Or rice. I lived off rice for a full year. Fancied it up by adding some salsa, and then extra fancy by also adding ranch dressing."
"Those were hard times."
– Ok_Opinion_
Having work definitely makes things easier.
Saving Up To Leave
"Started working while I was in school. Got out as soon as I could."
– ReallyIdleBones
Not Much Fanfare
"Yep, moved out for college in 2006. Came back for the summer in 2007, but thereafter I got an internship so I just stayed in the city. Got a job at the same place after I graduated."
"It was never some big moment for me (my parents are fine, just annoying), just a natural progression for me."
– Zerole00
Building A Life
"At 18. Worked in construction. Lived on a couch with 6 buddies in one house paying for college. Bought cheap land during the recession. Then built my own house."
– ReubenZWeiner
Not moving out by choice seemed to be a common shared experience.
High Turnover Rate
"Got kicked out at 14. Finished high school sleeping on friends couches while serving tables. Had a ton of roommates for the next 10 years. At any given time I was living with like 3 or 4 people, it was never boring haha"
– herriotact
Different Parenting
"I am hearing that so many people are actually kicked out in the really young age is well."
"But i am not getting that why parents are so tough because in my country they try to keep them under their wings."
– wowoao
Tough Love
"My friends parents were going to kick him out immediately after he graduated high school simply because 'That's what their parents did when they were his age.' His Dad fully expected him to go out at 18 and buy a house because 'he was able to.'"
"Then his Dad got pissed when my friend did not buy a house and went to live with his uncle instead. Even after his uncle broke down the whole 'Your mortgage is $2200/month with taxes and you expect your son, who works part time at $7.25 an hour to afford a mortgage? With no credit history?'"
"Some parents do it out of tough love. Some parents do it because they shouldn't have had children. Some parents still think the world is the same as it was in the 70s-80s and think minimum wage part time employees can thrive."
– bangersnmash13
Placed Expectations
"My parents didn't kick me out, but there was definitely an expectation for me to be moved out and financially independent at 18. My mother walked into a job as a radio DJ at the age of 18 and then became a journalist with only a high school education a few years later (early 1970s), so she had this expectation that I could do the same. The thought of me being able to do anything like that in the 2000s was laughable."
– pie12345678
I moved out of my parents' house because I booked my first professional gig on a cruise ship.
It couldn't have worked out better. I was paid to perform on board in the shows while my rent was already taken care of since I lived and worked on the ship.
I packed one suitcase and traveled the world doing what I loved for about two years. It was the best way to transition into an exciting new chapter in my adolescent life.
What's your moving out story?