People tell white lies to try and get their way out of trouble. However, they usually end up making the situation way worse, as evidenced by these answers given to a question posed by Reddit user, Parmersan:
Creamy or Chunky?
When I first got Married back in 2005, my wife asked me if I like Creamy Peanutbutter. I knew she did, so I told her "Yeah that's great!". She buys creamy peanut butter, I buy creamy peanut butter. About 3 years ago, she's doing some experiment or something with our daughter and she needed chunky peanut butter. I saw it in the pantry and exclaim "Oh chunky peanut butter, I love this stuff!" to which she responds "... You do? I've been buying Creamy peanut butter all these years because you told me that was your favorite"
So long story a little shorter, we both prefer chunky peanut butter by a large margin, but had been buying creamy for ten years because we both thought it was what the other preferred.
Reading that back, we're pretty boring people. yep :D SSChicken
No, Seriously, I Totally Belong Here
I was a new graduate student freshly arrived in the US and very poor, and I couldn't afford a laptop, so the only way I could communicate with my family was to hit up the library and use a public computer to email with them. Eventually my girlfriend back home wanted to Skype, and I wanted a little privacy for this, if you know what I mean, so I set about finding the most private computer available to me in the library.
On a recon mission the day before the Skype, I located a single computer in a conference room and the next morning got up at 7am to account for the time difference and walked into the conference room with my eyes totally focused on the computer. I'd actually walked most of the way in before I realized there was a group of people around the conference table having a ridiculously early morning meeting. The guy at the head of the table, apparently thinking I'd showed up for the meeting and that I was heading towards him, handed me a paper that said "agenda" and said he was so glad a graduate student had shown up, then launched into the most incomprehensible talk about electrodes and chemistry.
Meanwhile I know my girlfriend is sitting halfway around the world thinking we're going to have sexy time Skype and I'm blowing her off and I'm feeling desperate. But everything I knew about US culture was only based on movies, so I have no idea if I can just apologize and leave or what. I miserably sat down for the incomprehensible meeting, rehearsing all the excuses I can give my girlfriend when we talk later. I was barely paying attention. Eventually questions were directed at me and I confess that I'm a new grad student and I don't know much about the equipment they're talking about. Everyone excitedly tells me all about it and I still don't totally understand what they mean, except I'm starting to get that they're going on a research expedition to [an insanely exciting inaccessible dangerous place] and they're building a piece of equipment to bring with them.
By the end of the meeting I am part of the project. 6 months later I am in [an insanely exciting inaccessible dangerous place] helping to operate this equipment. I appear briefly in the background of a Discovery Channel documentary (only black guy within hundreds of miles so easy to spot). I happily transfer to this other lab and this other field for my fully paid and stipended PhD. I am considered a real go getter, mainly based on my arrival at an early morning meeting no one else wanted to attend. New major, new field, new life because I was too awkward to admit I had just been in the room to sexy Skype with my girlfriend. omgpie
I moved to a new city, and got a new dentist. For some reason, the guy thinks I used to see him at his old practice in a town I've never lived in. I corrected him a couple times, but he just keeps bringing it up, so now I just kind of roll with it. He asks after my parents, which is easy enough...but we've had all kinds of conversations about local restaurants I've never been to and other random stuff like that. Davran
I Don't Do Beer
Wasn't a drinker in high school so to shut down peer pressure I told them I was born with half a liver and drinking anything could make me very sick or kill me.
The lie just became natural and followed me to college. Was out with some friends playing pool and decided to have a beer. When I came back, a buddy slapped it out of my hand thinking I was suicidal. Then the explanations began... dopplegangerexpress
Happy Sad Day
A new coworker of mine tried downplaying his bday and eventually after me hounding him about why he didn't like celebrating, he eventually told me in confidence that his best friend was killed on his birthday and he hates thinking about it. Fast forward 8 years -- this guy and I had become really good friends. Best friends. Lived together at one point. He was accepted into my friend group and I always made sure to downplay his bday (his is 4 days after another friend) so we just did a group thing and never made a big deal about it. Finally someone got brave enough and wanted to talk to him about it, and he laughed and had no recollection of telling me that and said he was probably just screwing with me. He always wondered why no one wished him happy bday. jackrack1721
This Is Me, Now
Someone bought my wife a Vera Bradley handbag. She doesn't care for Vera Bradley, but uses the bag anyway.
Because of her use of Vera Bradley, people buy her Vera Bradley things. She has a ton of it, plus gift cards to Vera Bradley. So naturally she has a ton of Vera Bradley accessories. She is now considered by others to be 'very into' Vera Bradley, so she gets more stuff from Vera Bradley. ViolentEastCoastCity
I Am EXACTLY That Person
"You're here for the copywriting position right?"
I was the only one in the waiting area... thought I was there for a design/art direction role. Within 15 minutes of the interview they offered me $2K to move and $45K starting salary a week before graduation. erdle
Lying From Home
I was having a rough time commuting too far for work for a few months. Decided to quit to find something closer to home, but told everyone I had been approved to work from home. When I went to give my two weeks, my manager asked, "I know the driving has been killing you, how would you feel about working from home?"
Work laptop to my left and watching Great British Masterclass as I type, been working at home since then. Geekprincessia
Ger The Mailman
Not me but my Dad. We moved and he was convinced the postman's name was 'Ger' as in short for Gerry. He greeted him by it, nearly every day for about 10 years. We even gave him a Christmas card which he displayed down in the sorting office.
Fast forward and we have a temporary post man, my Mum asking him after a few weeks 'When is Ger coming back?' This was met with stunned silence and a puzzled look, with a resounding 'Who is Ger? No one works in the locality by that name'
Turns out, his name is Declan and he was too nice to correct my Dad for close to a decade. djaxial
In high school, I took a 2-year class spanning junior and senior years. We switched seats sporadically and in the second year I got seated next to a girl who for whatever reason thought my name was the same as another student in the class (she didn't mix us up, but thought we had the same name).
I was extremely timid in high school so I didn't want to correct her and just thought I'd let it ride since I knew we were going to different colleges and I'd likely never see her again. 4 years later, she's organizing a reunion for our class and finds me on facebook, immediately messaged me asking why I let her call me the wrong name all that time... Return_Of_Urkel
Meet Your New Uncle
My uncle's name is Ernie and he owns a restaurant, and likes to talk to guests when they arrive and leave. One of the patrons that eats there a lot, confused his name with Bert, a la Bert and Ernie. Being the pleasant and polite asian dude he is, he didn't have the heart to correct him. Now whenever this one customer comes, the staff and and my aunt (the manager) has to call him Bert. He is my uncle Bert now. seen720
Liar, Liar, Pants on...
I became friends with one of the managers at Panera. One day as I was giving a cashier my order, he told her to give me the same discount as they give to firemen, police and paramedics, i think. He just chose this discount as it was an easy button to push on the register. Well this cashier really thought I was a fireman. I'm not. So for the next two years this cashier gave me the discount. Even if she wasn't serving me, she would go out of her way to tell the cashier that was helping me, "He's a fireman, give him the discount". It snowballed into such an awkward situation that I didn't know how to get out of it. Luckily that cashier eventually transferred to another store and I now happily pay full price. Steve0512
Never Say No To A Free Dinner
I didn't want to go to dinner with the gang from work, including my boss, so I told them I was having dinner with my wife and her parents. I lied.
I get home, wife wants to go out to dinner. So, we head to the restaurant, and just as we're getting near the door, I see the work gang with my loudmouth boss all piling out of their cars. What are odds of us picking the same restaurant? S***. Busted.
There was an old couple walking into the restaurant in front of us. I held the door for them, and insisted they join us for dinner. They were quite perplexed, but accepted my offer of a free dinner.
It was the most uncomfortable dinner ever. They had no clue who we were, none of us had any shared interests... they rushed through dinner, thanked us, and got the hell away from what I'm sure they thought were a couple of weirdos. disgustipated
The Boxing Champion
People picked on my brother in high school for getting jumped by some wannabe blood thugs in the bathroom. It was relentless. His confidence and any friendships were crushed, cause, you know, people cant be seen with the loser.
One day I was confronted by said thugs, basically talking s*** about my brother, and in my infinite wisdom, I said I could box so they better back off. Something to that affect. Looking back, I cringe, but you do what you have to.
Needless to say, they did not back off. Somehow, I landed a punch on one of the kids that dislocated his jaw. Like, flapping around like a mouth piece hanging from a football helmet.
I became the kid who could box but never wanted to fight, which I guess gave me credibility. I dont really know. Everyone and their hyena came to me asking where they could learn said boxing skills, how Id learned by 16, all that crap. Id wanted to just come out and say I had been lucky, but I didnt want anyone to give my brother sh*t again. So the lie stayed.
Luckily, no one ever picked on my brother afterwards, and I did eventually learn some boxing fundamentals, but most because I felt like I was living a lie. Which I was. As a man, I have not had to keep up the facade. PhotoreceptiveFlyer
Run For Your Life
In 4th grade I lied and said I was going to a track meet to impress some friends in class when the teacher asked if anyone was going. I went home and told my mom I needed to sign up for it. I was never good at athletics at this time in my life.
I ended up going to the track meet, it was a 400m race I was entered in, I remember the moment the gun went off I immediately went into a mode I had never remotely gone into before, I was actually ultra competitive for once in my life. I was neck and neck with another kid for the first place spot the entire race, and going into the final stretch I felt like puking and every fiber of my body was burning and he was pulling away. Something came over me and I kicked it into psycho mode and pushed past him for the win and my legs felt like noodles and I collapsed and couldnt get back up.
That race qualified me for a regional meet, I did that one and won again in similar fashion, then went to the state meet and got my ass handed to me. That started me down a long line of running long distance which involved being one of the best in the nation in high school and getting a scholarship to run in college, and trust me the training at that level consumes your life (100 mile weeks), so it was definitely my life at that point. gabriot
Mix Master DJ
I've been making EDM since I was 13, and in my senior year of High School I had the opportunity to play some of my music live with Ableton for my classmates at an event. But, because I couldn't explain what I was doing in the space provided on the sign-up sheet I just put down "DJ", thinking that nobody would be knowledgeable enough to know the difference. Apparently everybody liked it so much that the prom committee asked me to DJ prom, and like an idiot I said yes. I waited for my birthday, and made sure that nobody got me any gifts-just money, which I spent on software and a Mixtrack Pro. I learned how to DJ in three months, did prom, got payed 250$. I'm making decent money off of gigs now, and I do the prom every year. Sanity_Assasin
"The Things We Do For Love"
When I was little, my grandma would make me these horrible frozen chicken tenders filled with cheese. They were just god-awful. Because I am a good grandson, I told her that I loved them. From then on, every time that I visited her, she would cook me those abominations. Even when I was in graduate school, I would go visit her and for one meal, I would have to slide those gross things down my gullet.
Every time I would say, "Thanks! I love them!" The things we do for love. the_planes_walker
The Best Guitar Player
I did online homeschooling for a few years and there was a forum where you could socialize with other students enrolled in the school. During this time I was big into making music on a DAW I had downloaded. I didn't know how to play any instruments, but I could still download different drum beats and guitar riffs from the dev's website. I shared a few songs with my fellow "classmen" and told everyone that I could play guitar and had a friend that tracked the drums. Eventually people started asking me for guitar lessons or more songs. I couldn't keep up the lie so I told them that my friend moved to Africa for a missions trip and would not return for the foreseeable future. But everyone in that forum thought I could play guitar. I couldn't, and still can't play to save my life. Primitive_Teabagger
Debate Topic: Is Lying Okay?
My mother was a super control freak, so one of the ways I would avoid home was after school extracurriculars. I got the date wrong on a math team meeting, so I lied to my mom about it while actually attending the debate team intro meeting. I probably didn't need to lie, but it was always safer to not disrupt her precious schedule. Eventually, debate became a regular activity for me to avoid home.
In 3 years, I was a state semifinalist and in college, I coached the high school national champions and turned that into a free ride for a masters degree. loungeboy79
I told my parents i bought a duck when I was 20 to tease them. I found a picture online of one and sent it to them. Sadly, they believed me. They got overly excited about their "grand-duck" and told my whole family. I ended up buying a duck... ThePolishFish
This Is Steve, Now
My husband's best friend has a 6 year old daughter that I see often. When she was almost 3 she babbled something to me (I think it was "My friends here!") and my husband interpreted it as "My friend Steve!" and started calling me Steve in front of her. Now her whole family call me Steve when she's around, and she still believes that's my name. For clarity, I'm a female and my name isn't anything close to Steve. rebel_natureWhen You Just Don't Want To Play A Video Game
One time someone who I wanted to be better friends with showed me a metal gear solid meme and me being me I pretended to understand it. I then was forced to research all the games and their plots, Easter eggs, quotable characters, and other memes to better fake understanding. I still have never played a metal gear solid game. StandardAlmond
And Sometimes, The Best Reason You Can Lie To Someone...
So I'm a visiting nurse and started seeing a patient 3 days/week for wound care. He was a paraplegic and didn't get out much or have many visitors. He offered me a cup of coffee one morning, but I didn't know him very well yet and was uneasy about drinking something out of unknown person's kitchen. Plus, we are really not supposed to, but I could tell he just needed a little company. I told him I drink it black to keep it simple, never planning to have another cup.
Next day, I come in and notice a little sticky note on his counter that said "Remember to make fresh pot of coffee for Rachael". It was so touching to me that I went early every single appointment from that day forward to have a cup of black coffee. I hate black coffee but I felt it was too late to tell him I liked creamer after all. I drank black coffee with him for 3.5 years and he became a good friend until he passed away... rachabe
You work hard for your money, you should be allowed to use it.
What's the most expensive thing you've bought?
Being an adult means sometimes, the most expensive thing you can buy, is something extremely practical and inoffensive.
Aw, That's Nice
"Diamond earrings for my mother. She believes that you can't buy diamonds for yourself, as a tradition, but no one has ever given her diamonds as a gift, so when I grew up and started earning money, I bought her earrings, she cried with happiness."
Should Have Kept It Small
"Small boat w/ trailer. Worst decision ever. I should've just gone with a kayak"
"Mountain bike. It cost more than any car I've ever owned"
"I only slightly regret the price because I should have gone higher. Yeti SB130 if you're wondering."
Treat Your Fingers
"An Ibanez Prestige guitar for 1500$. I've always played on normal priced guitars so wanted to try what the deal is with these higher priced guitars. The thing plays like a dream. Being new to a floyd rose bridge system, it is a pita but I'm sure I'll overcome this hurdle later. In case anyone is wondering, it is a model RG652AHM."
The most expensive thing you buy might not even be something you were expecting to spend a lot of money on. In fact, it might be something you didn't even plan on buying in the first place.
Something To Play On
"A ps4 at a third-world country."
"You think ps5 scalpers that sell the console for thousands of dollars are bad? That's cute. They ain't got shit on legit big stores that import the console legitimately and have to raise the price because of nasty import taxes."
"I bought a Gaming PC and the cost was like buying a Cheap Motorcycle in my country (Mexico)"
"Gaming in 3rd World Countries is hard , no wonder why everyone plays mobile games like Free Fire"
Do They Make Good Pets?
"I got pigeons as pets, 4 in total. My second pigeon I brought him (Pulgas) from a slaughter house cause I was looking for a mate for my first pigeon (Nieves). Well I ended up paying $20 for him and after a month he got really sick and we had to take him to the vet. After treatment and care the total cost was $550. And that's how I ended up with a $570 pigeon named Pulas, the little isopod of the house lol"Bormahu-3-
Buying Something That Might Explode One Day
"A freeze dryer. This thing had an 80 lb vacuum pump that ran on mineral oil and it could drop the air pressure of its chamber to below 300mTorr and the temperature to below -50 F. It would take about 36-48 hours to freeze dry 7 lbs of food. It was an electricity hog and probably could have exploded or caused a fire if operated incorrectly."
"I kept it in my parent's garage."
Looking at all the entries, for the average person, the most valuable thing you own might be the very thing you're living in.
Or clothes. It could be clothes.
"But it was worth it"
"Marriage is grand. Divorce is 5 grand."
Hurts Now. Pays You Back Later.
"Yep! And then all the things you need to work on in the house..."
"The Great thing about a house, though, is that while it is extremely expensive (absolutely the most expensive thing I have ever purchased by far) it is almost guaranteed to make you money over time. Where I live, housing is at a premium. We bought our first home a year and a half ago and it's estimated value has already risen $70 k. It's an investment that you also get to live in and enjoy. That's not something you can say about all expensive purchases."
It's A Storage Unit Full Of Useless Crap
"I'm going to clarify the question by adding "useless" to the sentence. The obvious answers as the question stands are going to be those big ticket items like a house or car, luxury or not."
"So what's the most expensive, useless item I have ever purchased?"
"Well, maybe useless wasn't the best choice but I bought an RV with a payout received from a court case. Should have paid bills or something. I rarely use it."
"I once dropped $3500 on "dress clothes" at Macy's only to never wear them because the office I worked at wasn't business formal."
"I pay monthly for a storage unit full of stuff I don't need or want but can't manage to get rid of."
"When I get a windfall like a bonus or stimulus check, I like to go on AliExpress or Joom and buy $2-300 worth of useless crap."
Don't fret over what you own. Enjoy it. There's no reason no to be thankful you could afford it in the first place.
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Rules are in place to maintain some semblance of order. But that doesn't mean they are always effective.
There are many grammatical rules that are broken, like nouns acting as adjectives, or nouns acting like verbs.
To explore this concept and to hear input from strangers online, Redditor Shabbydarstqc asked:
"What 'exception to the rule' do you live by?"
According to these Redditors, telling the truth doesn't always set them free.
"Being honest. There's times where the truth isn't always for the better."
"You can be honest but you don't have to tell them everything you know."
Feel The Room
"Actually, when you are saying the truth you should consider why you are saying it. If it's to make someone look bad or yourself look good, you should say nothing at all."
Reeling It In
"Everything in moderation, including moderation."
"Basically, exercise restraint and self-control, but not to an extent that it bars me from new experiences, and with the understanding that it's okay to be a complete, sloppy disaster person sometimes."
Generally speaking, we should all treat everyone with kindness.
But, when we're wronged, do we take it lying down?
"Be nice to everyone, you never know what they are dealing with..."
"Except the b*tch that made a huge scene about my disabled son in a packed store at the checkout."
So What Happened Was...
"My son was 5 at the time. He has Septo-optic dysplasia, schizencephaly, and autism. Basically, he's missing two parts of his brain, had brain surgery for a large mass from the schizencephaly, totally blind in one eye and tunnel vision in the other. (It's honestly a miracle he is as functional as he is)."
"Anyway, we were behind the woman currently checking out. There was coloring books at the end of the check out line. He asked if he could look at them and I said that's fine. So he starting flapping his hands while walking that way because he was excited. The side she was standing on was the side he can't see out of. While flapping, his hand grazed her backside and she went off that he groped her. Yelled and pointed in the store that my 5 year old, that you can physically see is disabled- sexually assaulted her by groping her butt. Thankfully he had no idea the scene was about him because he was looking at the coloring books at that point. Im not one to yell, especially in public but I did. Then went to my car and cried wondering how many people like this he's gonna have to deal with in his life. It sucked."
It's all a matter of preference for these Redditors.
Being In Control
"Everyone in the neighborhood hires a lawn service to mow, weed, and trim their properties."
"I do my own - not because I can't afford it, but because I prefer the results when I do it myself."
"100%, same for food."
"$15 at home gets you a family meal and maybe leftovers, tastes good, decently healthy."
"$30 out gets you a family meal that is kind of meh, too salty and probably too greasy."
"Home Ec is a dying art."
"All things sugar free - except my coffee."
"Hah I'm the other way around. I love sugar, but keep it away from my coffee."
A Matter Of Taste
"Vegetarian except for lobster corn chowder."
"In my defense, the haters claim there is no actual lobster in the chowder so that's my excuse for eating it. It's been so long since I've had actual lobster that I forgot what it tastes like."
Going Off The Footpath
"Shoes. I just don't wear them unless I'm snowboarding, my boss is gonna show up to work, or I plan on doing a lot of walking around outside in the snow."
"I don't care about the needing to wear shoes signs at places."
As a general fan of cinema, I am open to watching all genres of film.
I'm also a huge fan of horror, and I can take bloody carnage, and everything having to do with the supernatural.
However, there is ONE film I refuse to watch, and that's Human Centipede.
Seriously, why would anyone ever watch it? I don't have to see it to know it is gratuitous and made for shock value only.
I challenge anyone that might argue it has artistic integrity. And if they try to make me watch it to prove a point, I just might allow them the win if only to spare me from puking my guts out.
Secrets, lies, and betrayal. That is often the foundation of a family. We can go through life thinking our families are perfect and everyone loves one another, that's the training that keeps us from searching for the skeletons in the closets.
But our secrets will always find a way to break free. We may not even be alive to see the outcome, which is anti-climactic, but they will be out of the dark eventually. And once we learn what some loved ones are hiding, life as we know it can be obliterated.
Some secrets may best be buried. So be really sure you want to know everything.
Redditor u/mykirto wanted to hear about all the family drama they've been uncovered, by asking:
What is the most f**ked up thing you found about your family?
My family has a history that includes the mafia, the FBI, murder in an asylum, alcohol, drugs... the list is endless. And I'd rather just watch Days of Our Lives.
Family IssuesStephen Colbert Love GIF by The Late Show With Stephen ColbertGiphy
"My mother told me that my dad, wasn't my real dad, drunk one night when I was 16. That was 31 years ago. To this day his side of the family still thinks I'm his."
Show me the $$$
"One of my uncles borrowed $20,000 from my other more successful Uncle to start a business and refuses to pay his more successful brother back because he's "got so much money already". The more successful uncle refuses to sue him because that's not what family does, but they are no longer on speaking terms."
Mum is crazy...
"My great-grandmother helped cover up a murder. Claimed the guy was a psychopath and attacked her daughter and granddaughter for no reason. In actuality, my mum was going through a phase where she would try to get men turned on by rubbing her arse on them. This guy pushed her off and told her to screw off."
"My mum took offence to this and claimed the guy was trying to take her clothes off. My grandmother, who was on all the drugs, came out of her room and stabbed the guy to death to protect her daughter. My mum told the truth after the guy was dead and they came up with a cover up story so that they wouldn't get in trouble."
We were on a BREAK!!!
"My grandpa and grandma broke up for a few weeks in August 1962. In that one week my grandpa got drunk one night and got the woman living across the hall from my grandma pregnant, and my grandma had a fling with a married man while on the late shift as a bartender and got pregnant herself. My grandparents got married and my grandma passed my aunt barb off as my grandpas child."
"The other woman gave my aunt Joyce up for adoption. Both were born exactly a week apart. 30 years later my mom was getting married and visited my Grandmas sister to hand out wedding invitations. My Grandmas sister decided that was the perfect occasion to tell my mother out of nowhere that my Aunt Barb was not my grandpas biological daughter. My mom was shocked and confronted my Grandma after the visit and who denied it."
"My mom then decided stupidly to keep it secret. It was kept a secret from my Aunt Barb for 40 years until my aunt Joyce found my grandpa and looked exactly like him. That is when my aunt Barb had a DNA test done and confirmed she wasn't his daughter. It took my aunt barb 17 years to find her real fathers family and she finally found them last year. They all accepted her into the family."
WTFSteve Harvey Reaction GIFGiphy
"My Dad lives in his car and is only given enough money for basic food and is only allowed in the house to clean it. He's more of a household servant than anything."
Yeah, that is a whole lotta mess. That's why sometimes you just have to change your name, or fake your death. These people are crazy.
CaptorFrustrated Skip Bayless GIFGiphy
"I have done extensive genealogical research and found that my maternal family enslaved over 700 human beings."
"My grandad had sex with everyone of my grandma's 5 sisters, over about 40 years, 3 he had long term affairs with. It all came out at my grandma's 60th birthday party when everyone had too much to drink. Fun times, trying to get between several old women, trying to prevent them from punching one another."
"While cleaning out a relative's house after his funeral, we discovered that the family member was virtually on a first name basis with every major law enforcement department (city, state and federal) within a 100 mile radius. Among other things, he had consulted on FBI cases."
"He wore his disdain for all politicians openly. So, imagine our surprise to discover that he'd been invited to almost every Presidential inauguration within the last forty'ish years. I never had any illusions that I ever truly knew this family member. But if I had, they would've gone away after discovering all that stuff."
"My great grandfather would lock my uncle in one of those big metal toolboxes you sometimes see in the back of trucks for hours as a form of punishment when he was a kid. I can't even imagine how hot it must have been being locked up outside in one of those during the summer. He must have been terrified. I see now why my uncle's a drug addict with a crap ton of mental health issues. And that's not even the worst thing my great grandfather did but that's not my story to tell."
Lord DNA can be messy. And now I want to know even less of my family's past. I'm going to cancel my Ancestry DNA package. Let's be strangers.
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There are some things that society just seems to expect adult humans to be able to do, but it looks like not everyone got the memo.
Whether due to never being taught, or a simple inability to pick up the skill no matter how much you practice, there are some things that some folks just can't do.
I was a teenager before I was finally able to properly ride a bicycle, and even now I'm not a stranger to falling off. Let me tell you: flying over the handle bars of a bike hurt a heck of a lot more at 25 than it did at 15.
Reddit user DeterminedGames asked the folks over on AskReddit:
Whistle While You Work
I can't whistle.
I'm certain it has something to do with the shape of my mouth and tongue. Been trying to whistle for 20 years and all i've managed is a very deep single tone that sounds like wind through an old building lol
Ugh I even watched YouTube tutorials and read a whole wikiHow article and I am still unable to do it.
Sticking With It Is Hard
Long-term passion for an activity.
There are people who remain active in a single hobby or club for decades. I can't do that. I burn out on most things after a couple months max.
I'm the same but I've convinced myself it isn't such a bad thing.
I enjoy trying new things and I'm kind of the 'jack of all trades but master of none' type, which I think is probably more useful in day to day life, rather than being really specialised at something.
I’ve always struggled with that. lately I’ve been trying to wrap new hobbies into my old ones. Oh, you’re tired of woodworking but doing photography? Guess what we’re filming your woodworking now!
Is It Worth It, Though?
Neatly folding the laundry. Usually it looks... acceptable. Unless it's a fitted sheet, then it just looks chaotic.
Shower thought: but is it worth it?
I can’t roll my R’s
So I’ll never be able to properly speak Spanish or impersonate AOSTH Robotnik
Same, my mother tongue has a lot of rolling Rs and I just never clicked it. It's taken me years of practice to even manage to do it properly occasionally, and if there are a lot of consonants around the R, there's no way I'm gonna say it right. People frequently laugh at my pronunciation of certain words in said language bc I sound like a lil kid or that dude in the Princess Bride. Meanwhile my younger brothers, who've lived in the UK all their lives, can speak the language with perfect accents. :/
Words Are Hard
I forget words and end up silent or saying something really stupid and then it's awkward.
I feel that, people always seem to have every word they need ready, and I'm just sitting there thinking of a single world that fits the situation...
I feel you. Sometimes I’m at the end of my sentence and then just forget the last part. I just give up on the sentence when that happens. Sometimes other people finish the sentence for me which is pretty awkward.
As Long As It Works
I can only tie my shoes by doing bunny ears
Yeah same and I don’t give a damn that I can’t do it the ‘adult’ way.
What's That Look For?
When someone gives me 'a look' I have absolutely no idea what they mean
People shouldn't always expect people to pick up on subtle signals, even if they think it's very obvious themselves.
And then they get mad because I couldn’t understand the “weshouldgotalkoutsidewhiletheyaregoingtodancesothatwecanbealoneandeatsomefreepizza” look. what the f**k?
I can't even make straight lines due to my hands being so shaky. Fortunately I can get around this by using art programs with bézier curves and other shaping tools.
Drawing is an unfathomable mystery to me. I just don't understand how people can do it. I've never been able to.
Talking to people randomly. I can carry the conversation for hours with literally anyone, but they have to initiate it
My brother is 48. He mostly has his same friend circle as we did in high school. Other people can be around for years but if they haven't initiated a conversation with him. He doesn't speak to them. People have said they thought he was an arrogant a*s but one day they said something to him directly and he talked their ear off. He's shy, not arrogant.
I Want To Ride My Bicycle
Bike riding. Never learned because I had supposed epilepsy and fainted a lot when younger.
I can't ride either. Tried to learn as a kid but couldn't get the hang of it. Friends tried to teach me as a bigger person. I can go, but can't turn. I'm afraid of getting hit by a car too.
You might get teased for not being good at any one of these skills. But the likelihood is, if you've made it this far without the skill, you're probably fine.