
Marriage is often one of the most difficult forms of relationships for young couples.
The fun of dating becomes mixed with the hefty responsibilities that come with truly building a life with another person and integrating your lives together.
It is not easy, often it will fail, there are times that will be painful however, if two people truly want to grow together they will find ways to overcome challenges in ways that strengthen their bond.
Redditor DurableRestriction17 wanted to hear the serious marriage advice people had to offer.
They asked:
"Married couples, what advice would you give to young couples?"
Basing your relationship off of mutual respect, similar values, and practicing spiritually together (whatever that may look like or if applicable) are all ways to make sure you have deeper connections.
The best advice overall though is do not lose yourself in joining your partner.
They love you and giving up things you enjoy to please them often fosters a seed of resentment over time.
Schedule time for yourself to enjoy hobbies, and time for them too.
"If you don't spend time together you are GOING to drift apart.”
“We have been married for 13 years, together for 15. Spend quality time together. Shut off your phones and go for a walk, cook a meal together, find a hobby you both enjoy, heck, you can have a lot of fun just doing household chores together."
“If you don't spend time together you are GOING to drift apart. I was severely burned in a brush fire 5 years ago, and was diagnosed with brain cancer a year later. My burn broke me, I fell into a terrible pit of depression."
“I spent most of the next year lying on the couch pissed off at the world. All of my relationships deteriorated in that time just because I separate myself from everything. But our marriage suffered the most. Unfortunately, my diagnosis made things even worse. My prognosis was quite grim, people in my position live for an average of 37 weeks."
"I have seen other people go through similar things. One of two things usually happens. It will draw them closer together, or one or both people will use destructive coping mechanisms to help cope with the fear and pain. Once we realized what was happening we started coming closer together again."
"When we were newly married, we spend a lot of time fishing. Just the two of us on a riverbank sitting on buckets trying to catch fish. The beauty of time like that is there is nothing to distract you from each other. It gives you a lot of time to just talk and get to know each other better."
"I've had 2 cancer recurrences that looked like it was the beginning of my end. I just started a new treatment that is working very well. We've been able to get back fishing a lot this summer, sometimes just the two of us, and sometimes we take the kids along too." thelemonx
Well noted! Sounds like a healthy relationship.
You are on the same team!
“Fight the issue, not each other.” BlackSwann0316
“Yes! My husband and I have a rule to always treat each other like we're on the same team. Having an explicit rule comes in handy for giving us the language to use when it doesn't feel like one of us is doing that. A gentle "it doesn't feel like we're on the same team right now" does wonders for reorienting the other away from anger and toward the problem at hand.” wantonyak
I concur! Your partner is not–and should not–be your enemy.
“Always remember to work on yourself, as your insecurities can easily form into blame towards your partner. ‘They're not doing enough’, ‘they're not making me feel special enough’ when you're insecure and not doing anything to fix it, it won't matter what your partner does.”
“So Always work on yourself, invite your partner to join you in your goals and the positivity from your efforts will strengthen your relationship with your partner and how you see yourself.” Ello_Owu
Insecurity can kill a relationship. Working on yourself is important!
Dont sweat the small stuff.
“Don't stress over the little sh*t. You'll get annoyed at things you didn't think possible, like how they organize themselves, how they load the dishwasher, difference in opinions for trivial things. Let that sh*t go.”
“Think about what truly matters to you before you start an argument over your misplaced toothbrush, the color of paint to use in the living room or what's going on in the garage at 10pm with all the swearing. This will differ a bit, but this is coming from a man that's been married for 14 years with two kids.” Beholder84
Exactly! Besides, stress kills. Don't do that to yourself.
“don't keep score...”
“Do things your spouse enjoys, and don't keep score. For example, my wife loves going to soccer games but I don't, and I love horror movies but my wife doesn't. But I still go to games with her, and she still watches horror movies with me. Support each others hobbies and interests.“ LagerLounge
Relationships are all about balance! Support each other – that builds good relationships.
Kindness is best practice...
“Kindness. Don't be short, rude, and proud. You have to live with this person the rest of your life. Always be kind. Forgive. You aren't immune to making any of the same mistakes. You're not as perfect as you think you are. Don't dwell on the negative in one another. This is a bad mental path to get on.”
“You are both imperfect. Compliment one another on your strengths. And help one another with weaknesses. Be committed. Life will change. You both will change. There is security in commitment. There is trust when you feel secure. Just a few things. 12 years, three kids, still learning.” Manbeard1000
If you're going to ride the waves of life together, you'll have to learn how to be compassionate and forgive.
Remember later on you may forgive but your friends or family may not...
“Don't talk sh*t about each other to your friends or family members. You're a team. If you have a complaint and need to tell someone, be honest with your partner about it rather than telling a third party.” ruthlessbaderginz
Absolutely! You are a team so you should act like it.
So important!
“Make sure you have the same life vision as your partner. You need to be in alignment on the big things.” SeaTie
Compatibility definitely matters!
“If you want to survive more than a decade in a marriage, be prepared to listen to your spouse. Not just to let them speak, but listen (engage). You want to be heard, so hear the other.”
“If/when negative emotions get too intense, don't jump to blame the spouse... It's hard. Try to find ways to interrupt the feeding-of-negativity-from-each-other cycle. Take a 5 minute break (claim you need a biobreak if nothing else).. The physical and temporal distancing will help folk calm down.”
“Also, as soon as you calm down, hug the other person and provide some sort of positive physical contact. Goes without saying, keep reinforcing positives and make positive statements frequently. Everybody wants to be loved - and you have to be there for each other.”
“Oh, one last thing: don't ever take someone else's side against your spouse in public. If they are in the wrong (can happen often), you must find ways to correct that behavior discreetly... if that really doesn't work (because people are obstinate), try to create a distraction (find an excuse) then talk to your spouse in private.” milagr05o5
Some great advice from people with marriage experience. Best of luck to the young couples, it's wild out there.
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People Explain Which Behaviors Are Associated With Men But Actually Everyone Does Them
There are things men do that easily annoy the opposite sex, simply by being a guy.
"That's such a dude move," or "typical male," can be examples of snide remarks made following disapproving gender-specific behavior.
"What is something most people think only men do, but actually women do as well?"

Get ready for some misconceptions to be turned completely upside down.
Time For Tootin'
"For years I thought ladies didn’t fart. My mom told me that so it had to be true. It didn’t matter that I was a girl and farted. I thought there was just this magical age where girls turned into ladies and stopped farting."
"Apparently even when my mom did fart, I’d whip my head around and go 'ewwww dad!' Mom found it hilarious, dad not so much. Then one day I was in the bathroom with my mom (cause who trusts a four year old for longer the two minutes by themselves?) and I heard it: The quiet mythical fart from a lady."
"Oh Lordy, I told everyone! Everyone needed to know that ladies do fart, even my mom and she’s a lady! Dad found it hilarious, mom not so much."
– huskeya4
Cheeky Adjustment
"The weird side step."
"Sometimes when I wear really short shorts, my butt cheeks start 'eating' my shorts and I have to try my best to make a discreet weird side step to adjust it..."
– 5cm-persecond
Assuming The Position
"Keep hand in pants in a non sexual way when just chilling."
– Clafoutie
It's A Pleasure
"I grew up thinking women couldn’t masturbate only men could. In middle school I searched up women masturbating and bro my jaw dropped."
– Empty_DrPepperCan
Redditors share their thoughts about men and women keeping up with appearances.
Keep It Smooth
"Shave their face."
– Jewz1986
"I feel like women even keep this a secret from each other until you find out someone else does too or how common it is. Even still most women will rename it as “dermaplaning”. Such stigma around it."
– South-Housing-748
Checking The Fitness Progress
"Flex in the mirror."
– happy-sam1
Just Gross
"Be dirty and lazy."
– ThinkIGotHacked
"I've worked in customer service most of my life, and can easily say that women's restrooms are an absolute nightmare compared men's restrooms 95% of the time. Like seriously, just throw your tampons in the trash, and wipe up your blood please; you've got a whole roll of tp 6 inches from your elbow."
– GenericThomas
Cruising
"Check out women."
– winnisp
"Even straight women check out women. Source: am a straight woman… I think."
– Solid_Explanation769
Just a thought, or may two or three.
Chivalry Is Non-Binary
"I just said this on another thread but, having fantasies about saving people or sacrificing yourself for them."
– Seyorin
Revved Up Without Warning
"Get horny over nothing or randomly."
– False-Stage-3826
Zoning Out
"Seem to be in deep thought but is actually just gaping at a wall with zero thoughts. Alternately, may be thinking of somethings completely random. That meme about the wife thinking the husband is probably thinking if another woman, when in reality he's thinking of something random ? Ya, as a woman, I relate with that husband."
– abookishhuman
Locker Room Talk
"Talk and joke about sex. I can’t speak for everyone, but I find girls talking about it more than guys."
"Heck, at one point we were having a little bonfire, and one couple got up to leave. My friend’s wife asked if they wanted to play Among Us when they got home, and the other girl just turned around and casually said 'Nah, this is usually about the time we have sex.' To which my friend’s wife responds 'Oh yeah, we just did that this morning.'”
– Oldspice0493
The point is, all genders are capable of similar behavior that people have been socialized to exclusively associate with men.
And there's nothing wrong with that.
We are all equally guilty of being a little naughty, regardless of gender. So get over it.
It still amazes me that we live in a world where people are charged for drinking water. Water is a necessity! I have a lot of disdain for companies like Nestle, which siphons millions of gallons of water from entire communities only to sell it back to them.
What the hell is up with that? Does that not sound dystopian to anyone else? Okay, then. Water should be free – this should not be controversial.
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor that_boy_ste asked the online community,
"You can make one thing/service free for the entire planet. What are you making free?"
"Healthcare would be awesome..."
"Clean drinking water, sadly. Healthcare would be awesome and if that covers water since water is essential for health, then yes!"
lisainpotown
Ah, healthcare.
*cries in American*
"Because there are..."
"Education. Because there are entirely too many ignorant people on this planet."
i_am_the_nightman
That and over time this resolves literally every other problem...
"...so children and adults..."
"Education, so children and adults who are not able to go to school or afford to can now do so."
plumskiwis
I wonder how much society could have advanced if education were free
"It's already free in my country..."
"Healthcare, it's already free in my country, but I want people in all the world to be healthy."
giuloeffe10
Life would improve pretty quickly for so many people if this were the case.
"Basic housing."
"Basic housing: floors, walls, ceilings and a roof, running water, working drains, electricity, heat and air conditioning, cooking facilities, refrigeration, etc."
Emu_on_the_loose
Though this is "basic" by American standards, which is pretty good by many developing world standards, it should be the basic minimum for people everywhere in the world.
"Clean, free energy..."
"Clean free energy is the best answer. Everything else posted here requires energy to produce."
mandaraprime
Everyone is focused on helping people in their day-to-day lives. Free clean energy would help the planet long-term.
"I live in America..."
"I live in America, so I’d have to say hospital stays. Healthcare in general. Moved away from family shortly before Covid, got Covid real bad shortly after. Had no debt. Started my adult life $3,500 in the hole. Yeah, free healthcare."
SkuSku56
The debt trap people fall into just because they needed to go to the doctor or hospital is so predatory and wrong.
"Based on my narrow view..."
"Based on my narrow view of the world, housing is my biggest expense. So based on that logic, housing would make the biggest difference. Although, if you consider Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, physiological needs are more important."
scipper77
I was looking at some budgeting advice the other day. They suggest your housing expenses should be 30 percent of your pay. I laughed and laughed and laughed.
"Transportation."
"Transportation. If moving things from one place to another had no cost we could reduce the cost of everything else AND eliminate regional scarcity of most commodities."
HugeMisfit
Indeed it would! A game-changer if put into practice.
"Therapy is very essential..."
"Hmmmmmm I'd say, therapy, therapy is very essential and can help greatly."
DirectorLeather6567
Human behavior has gotten us into most of our world problems, and behavior change is one of the hardest things to accomplish. Therapy is just the tip of the iceberg, but would help at a large scale if free.
Human beings have boundless potential. The world isn't perfect — remember that there's no law saying that things need to remain as they are. Humans have always innovated and reaped the benefits in the long run.
Have some suggestions of your own? Tell us more in the comments below!
When I was a kid, I would occasionally watch this show called Big Bag. It went off the air more than 20 years ago and it seemed to only play at five or six in the morning. If I happened to wake up early, I'd catch it. It was targeted toward preschool viewers and was fun and silly, a partnership between Cartoon Network and what is now the Sesame Workshop.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm the only person who remembers it existed. But I'm not the only one with this kind of dilemma.
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor LegitimateMangoHeir asked the online community,
"What's a show from your childhood that no one else seems to remember?"
Sagwa The Chinese Siamese Cat (2001)
"I thought Sagwa the Chinese Siamese Cat was a fever dream for so long."
lucianfoster
Probably because it only had a single season! Might as well have vanished off the face of the earth after that.
Hamtaro (2002)
"Hamtaro. For the LONGEST time I distinctly remembered watching the show but couldn't remember what it was called or anything else. I remember having a revelation in middle school and going "IT'S REAL???"
SurrealGod
It certainly was real! And it was quite possibly the cutest thing to ever be broadcast on our television screens.
Gargoyles (1994)
"There's a specific age group that really enjoyed Gargoyles."
[deleted]
Hi, it's me. I'm the age-group. There are dozens of us!
Mummies Alive! (1997)
"Mummies Alive! That and Gargoyles were my favourites to watch after school."
DiamondEyeOctopus
Another one that aired for a single season, it was part of a general trend of "mummymania" in 1990s pop culture.
Out of the Box (1998)
"Out of the Box. So long, farewell, to you my friends."
tryharderSr
This one had a good run. That theme song is now in my head.
Count Duckula (1988)
"Count Duckula. The best damn cartoon ever!"
Belthezare
I hadn’t heard that theme song in decades and I was just transported back to my childhood room.
Maggie and the Ferocious Beast (2000)
"Maggie and the Ferocious Beast. Great googly moogly!"
peanutbutter707
O Canada! This one was cute!
Stick Stickly from "Nick in the Afternoon" (1994)
"Anyone remember Stick Stickley on Nickelodeon? I even remember the jingle but everyone I talk to looks at me crazy!"
eluzum
Write to me, Stick Stickley, PO BOX 963, New York City, New York State, 10108!
The Angry Beavers (1997)
"The Angry Beavers. People look at me like I’m a psycho when I mention it."
[deleted]
This one — along with CatDog — was super popular!
2 Stupid Dogs (1993)
"2 Stupid Dogs. Well, ain't that cute. But it's wrong!"
DeathSpiral321
I quote that line at least once a day. I loved that show.
You should probably run to YouTube and take a trip down memory lane. Thankfully, many of these are available in some capacity for you to enjoy!
Have some shows you love that you'd like to mention? Tell us more in the comments below!
You know what would be great?
If "family influencers" didn't exist. I don't know what people get out of watching people do their shopping and raise their kids, but it sounds boring as hell. Oh, and did I mention that the children have pretty much no privacy from the moment they're born? Yeah... that'll be a treat for them to comprehend when they're older.
But there are a host of other things out there that are just as annoying. People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor RAZOR314 asked the online community,
"What modern trend do you absolutely hate?"
"News agencies writing articles..."
"News agencies writing articles about "all these people are saying X" when it's just a few random people on Twitter, and generally the trend of amplifying fringe theories, beliefs, conspiracies, etc."
DaveInDigital
I think one of the unfortunate developments in the modern media landscape is the obsession with Twitter. I think it really exacerbates some current issues of representation in the media.
"I hate these videos..."
"I hate those videos with a split screen and something interesting is happening on one half, while an 'influencer' is literally just watching on the other half."
"I do not give a single f*ck about the influencer. I just want to see the thing on the other side. You know, the thing worth reacting to."
Penguigo
So true. They can't create worthwhile content so they "react" to the worthwhile content.
"People recording..."
"People recording when they should be helping."
[deleted]
Sometimes recording does help — look at all the instances of police brutality that have made national headlines — but it's not when people are recording for likes, views, clout etc.
"The abundance..."
"The abundance of unskippable ads on videos. I 100% guarantee I will actively try to not buy your product if you're interrupting what little precious time I have to watch something."
Goatiac
Yes, it makes me so angry. Stop wasting my time. I will click out of something so fast.
"Corporations..."
"Corporations buying single family homes and turning them into rentals."
[deleted]
And people wonder why there's a housing crisis.
"All controls..."
"All controls in a car being through a touch screen."
"For driving safety I wanna keep my eyes on the road, and want to find controls (like window wipers, radio by touch. With a touch screen, I have to look to see if I am touching the right place on the screen for the control I want."
u233
Yes! It's an unnecessary design change, honestly more trouble than it's worth.
"The fact..."
"The fact that EVERYTHING is a f*cking ad."
badchad65
There are many ways to get around that and you can learn about it in my new book How to get rid of ads (free with your Amazon Audible trial).
"Everything nowadays..."
"Subscription services. Everything nowadays is being turned into a monthly bill."
TutuKitten
It's awful. And everything is so expensive. Why bother having all these subscriptions in the first place, right?
"The abundance..."
"The abundance of people trying to be influencers/streamers, while the majority of them are about as interesting as a boil."
mugen1337
To be honest, most people would rather watch the boil.
Frustrated yet?
We live in a pretty cool world. It'd just be better if most of this stuff didn't exist.
Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!