People Share The Real Reason They Don't Want To Have Kids
Roberto Nickson on Unsplash

In relationships, there are two camps to which couples respectively belong: those who wish to have kids and those who do not.


While there are many couples who wish to expand their family unit, there are just as many that would rather not provide for another human for more reasons than you think.

Curious to hear from strangers online, Redditor AGstudios22 asked:

"What makes you not want to have kids?"

These are why having kids is not for them.

Too Much Work

"I can barely take care of myself."

– Altruistic_Peak7690

A Past Trauma

"My ex who said 'now you can't leave me.'"

– Between_the_narrows

Creepy Factor

"Those kids who have parents that are perfectly normal but still somehow act like mini serial killers."

– mikmikthegreat

The Laborious Process

"Pregnancy."

– Ilovethecolourred

"This is 90% of it for me. I’ve always been terrified of pregnancy, but I thought I’d feel more comfortable with it as I got older."

"Nope. I’m 34 and the thought of being pregnant still freaks me out to no end. I’d love to adopt, but I don’t think I ever want to be pregnant."

– notstephanie

When it comes to making a decision about having kids, these folks are not on the fence.

Not For Them

"I would be a terrible parent."

– IAmABurdenOnSociety

"I would be a terrible parent but a great uncle :)"

– Any-Energy-6126

Full-Time Job​

"The idea of being responsible for a human being isn't for me."

– Goobula

It's All-In Or Nothing

"The fact that nothing really makes me WANT to have them. I feel like you should have an overwhelming desire to become a parent - I don’t, so why would I have a kid?"

– pupsnpogonas

Consider The Consequences

"As a child of a parent who didn’t actively want them, thank you for thinking about what this does to a kid."

– fivefeetofawkward

On The Other Hand

"I would be a terrible parent but a great uncle :)"

– Any-Energy-6126

Nephews And Nieces Are Best

"Exactly my position. I have 2 neices and a nephew. Everyone always says how good I am with them and asks why me and my girlfriend aren't trying for our own. I'm good with my niece because I know at the end of the day she goes back home and I don't need to deal with her all the time. She's excited to see me and always in a good mood because she only sees me every other week or so, whereas every day I couldn't put up with it."

– AlexF2810

For some, it's a matter of budgeting concerns.

Lack Of Profit

"After rent, food, and insurance I only come away with 200$ a month profit. Which is usually eaten up by a single doctor visit or necessary car part. And I live with two roommates."

– Snowfreak2507

You Can't Go Back

"It's irreversible, you can't unhave kids when you've committed to it, so when you have all those doubts and fears you might not be a good parent, it's hard to take the plunge."

"Plus I'd have to find someone to have a kid with and make more money for it to be viable but I think they're secondary to actually wanting to go through with it."

– Latifi_WDC_2023

People talk from experience and realize kids will never be in their future.

All That Screaming

"My neighbor has 7 of them. The only form of communication in that house is screaming. The teenage boy just screamed in the middle of my typing this. Kid is absolute shite at whatever game he's trying to play. My work meetings are constantly interrupted by his whiny cursing/crying sessions."

– QuackWaddleflow

The Older Brother As An Example

"I've been dealing with a mentally disabled older brother for nearly all my life. He's 32 yrs old, but acts like a 7 yr old nearly ALL the time. I love him to death, but after so long of dealing with him growing up (I'm 22), I just do not have the patience to handle something like that again."

"Edit: Wow, didn't expect this to blow up. Thanks for the kind and understanding comments everyone! To everyone else struggling with something similar, know that you're not alone. It may feel exhausting at days, and sometimes you might wish you weren't even in such a postion. But cherish those moments you share with them where they're the happiest you've ever seen them. Because at the end of the day, you're all they have left. I fear for my brother's future every day, and hope that he grows up well without the need for us to care for him 24/7."

– MajesticxFlan

Forever Young

"This is my big one. I feel terrible for this, but the fear of having a child that isn’t going to grow into a fully independent person with no limitations stopped me dead. If there was a guarantee they would be of average mental capability, I might reconsider."

– VanessaClarkLove

It's a big responsibility. Those who have several offspring to take care of surely have days when they have regrets and are envious of friends who've opted not to have kids.

But overall, the eventual gratitude grown children express to their parents can be a huge reward. So they say.

Is that prospect worth it in the end?

Your answer will indicate where you stand.

Let us know in the comment section!

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