One of my closest friends is a cannabis entrepreneur in Colorado. Recently I got to help her out packing orders. Somewhere around hour 7 with my fingers raw from work I sighed and went "UGH. TV lied to me. There is so much packing tape involved in being a drug dealer! Nobody told me about packing tape!"
TV and movies make it look like shady deals in the park and slowly riding around in Escalades with black-out window tinting. Turns out, nope! There aren't really a lot of scary thugs - she's a single mother, in fact. And shady deals? Ha. Not a chance. It's mostly the usual customer service stuff in a brightly lit and clean shop with a whole lot of admin, and so much packing tape. Would not recommend if you have skin that's sensitive to adhesives or oils - or a personality that's sensitive to being asked 458 rapid-fire questions.
Reddit user Wino 2009 asked:
How is your career misrepresented on tv or in movies?
So now you know serving the cannabis community doesn't look at all like it does in the movies, but you'd be surprised how many other careers Hollywood has totally lied to you about. Take a look.
Not That Kind Of Nanny
As the Nanny I'm not trying to seduce the husband and murder the wife.
Dad
I'm a stay at home dad so therefore I must be really stupid and inept. Wooops! Accidentally put the baby in the dryer again!
Scientists
GiphyScience is not a montage of swirling chemicals in beakers and claiming "eureka!" and making brilliant new discoveries.
It's a lot of begging for money grant writing, doing some tedious stuff 100's to 1,000's of times, then spending ages processing your data and running your stats and usually going "hmmm... inconclusive."
Damn It, Larry!
Nursing. TV shows make it look like adrenaline fueled "someone get the crash cart!" kind of work. When really it's tons of charting, taking granny to the bathroom and "GOD DAMN IT LARRY STOP DRINKING COKE AND TAKE YOUR INSULIN DO YOU WANT TO LOSE ANOTHER TOE?!?!"
Military Intel
There's no fancy technology for military intel. We use Microsoft office. I give briefings with power point. I send documents made in word and excel through outlook.
- Sumelar
Shat On By 3 Separate Humans
According to TV/movies I strap women down on beds on their backs and yell at them to push about 5 minutes after their waters broke dramatically. Also the baby looks about 3 months old, placentas aren't a thing and it's incredibly neat and tidy ...also less poop.
My record for being shat on in 1 shift is by 3 separate humans. To be fair 2 of them were newborns, but still. I've had every (female) bodily fluid on my body at some point in my job. Sweat, blood, tears, poop, pee, vomit, amniotic fluid. And then I go and eat lunch without blinking an eye.
Nothing Like Baywatch
GiphyLifeguards don't wear sexy bathing suits and seductively put sun lotion on while not paying attention to the pool/beach. We don't look like bronze gods and goddesses and nobody is smiling the entire three hours they spend on stand in one sitting. We don't get paid 30 bucks an hour to sit on our @sses and do nothing all day.
We're sweaty messes that (most of the time) HAVE to wear our work uniforms over our mandatory one piece bathing suits. We also have to cashier, clean, do customer service and be good reps for our respective companies. We have to put up with sh*tty guests not listening and ignoring our whistle warnings who then want to fight us about it while we're busy watching our water.
And if we're not paying attention to the water while on stand, the manager can and WILL throw a mannequin in the water and if you don't react and grab it in thirty seconds you are more or less terminated. You have to be on point and paying attention the entire time or your negligence can be fatal.
Can't Land The Plane
I'm an air traffic controller (no Breaking Bad jokes, please).
We are not trained at all on how to fly a plane. Zero. We can't tell someone how to land a plane if something goes wrong. I've never even ridden as a passenger on the model of most of the planes I spend all day talking to. Many controllers have never been in a cockpit, and I know a few who have never flown on a plane.
Pilot Here
Pilot here
- It's not dramatic
- It's literally the safest goddamn thing on planet earth
- The co-pilot is usually just as qualified and experienced as the captain, and usually has captain experience from past airlines. Most choose to stay co-pilots if it can get them a better schedule or aircraft type. They both fly the plane and both know what they're doing.
- In the event of an emergency, we have no emotion. Just calmly execute the appropriate response procedures and divide our tasks
Try It...
I'm a construction superintendent who believes ALL fix-up shows are bogus. You and the wife (and your 3 kids, 2 cats and a dog) are NOT going to completely demo and remodel your kitchen during your one week vacation. Try it and there's going to be trouble.
"Too Much" Meth
GiphyTV shows (like Chicago fire) portray paramedics as going from one exciting, life saving call to the next. In reality, most of our calls are for things like:
Elderly person fall from standing.
Intoxicated person passed out on bus bench.
Took "too much" meth.
Sore throat for 3 days. Already saw family doctor. But it still hurts so I decided to call 911.
Intoxicated person passed out in a park.
Nose bleed.
Homeless person wants a free ride somewhere warm and a free sandwich.
Intoxicated person passed out in McDonalds.
I've had chronic knee pain for 15 years. I have a prescription for narcotics, and the pain is no different than normal, but thought maybe it was time to go get it checked out again.
Took meth. Now everyone is following me and trying to kill me.
Took meth. Now I think I can fly, and I'm climbing buildings.
And then with the legalization of marijuana, there was a lot of "tried pot for the first time. I don't like how it makes me feel. Make it stop!" 😂
Anyway, of course you occasionally get a shooting/stabbing/ random trauma/MI/legit medical issue. But the job certainly isn't going from pulling people out of a burning building after cutting off their trapped limb, then running to someone who is skewered onto a fence, then someone who has an unexploded bomb in their abdomen, then right to a passenger train derailment, then finishing your shift delivering quadruplets in an elevator that you accessed through the roof hatch because it's stuck between floors.... (Though...I can't speak for everyone. SOME medics are black clouds... Haha)
Therapists Have Boundaries
Anyone in TV or movies who plays a Social Worker, therapist, clinical counselor, counselor, or psychiatrist. There's like ALWAYS inappropriate boundaries. The movie 50/50 comes to mind but there are a ton of others.
I AM a Social Worker and we have to be very careful about dual relationships. We cannot hang out or go clubbing with our clients. We absolutely cannot sleep with them. We could lose our license and never be able to practice again. And we can get in trouble for breaking HIPAA and confidentiality if it's not an issue of safety, (harm to self, others, or the client is aware of someone who is being hurt).
I cringe when they show therapists acting inappropriately. The majority of us practice within our scope and have healthy, professional relationships with our clients. And if we're unsure we consult with our colleagues, supervisors or our code of ethics. And we do know that sleeping with a client is a HUGE no-no.
Medical Ethics
The amount of medical ethics broken in some TV shows would get your licence suspended for sure.
You don't scream at uncooperative patients, you can just refer them to another doctor. You don't give them placebo pills just because they are being difficult and you most certainly do not obnoxiously talk about a patient in the hallway and the elevator of the hospital. Patient confidentiality is something I have never seen made a priority in medical dramas (at least in the few i have watched). There are obviously more little things that put me off and it just makes medical dramas difficult to watch, personally.
Indiana Jones
Oh man. Indiana Jones goes ripping through temples, destroying artifacts. He's pretty much the exact opposite of an archaeologist.
No Gangsters
GiphyWeed farming is not exciting at all. I don't have to deal with gangsters or get to do a bunch of whacky science to come up with my own special strain. At the end of the day it's just mixing nutrients and keeping track of temperatures and humidity levels. I do get to smoke a lot, so that's kind of real, but my tolerance is so high it doesn't really matter.
Typing Notes, Zero Sex
As a TV doctor I'd be solving intense medical mysteries and having sex in the callrooms almost daily. Instead I'm typing notes, browsing Reddit, and having exactly zero sex.
1% Zen
Restoring antique furniture is 99% removing mold/ rust/ dirt/ rot/ being stabbed by hidden tacks and nails and 1% relaxed, zen polishing of a gorgeous tabletop.
- Nikki_9D
Security Guards
Security Guards aren't supercops.
Any guard STUPID enough to observe something suspicious and not call it in or walk around an empty dark building with a flashlight deserves what happens to him.
The whole watching TV instead of looking at cameras? That's accurate.
Voice Teacher
Obviously all a voice teacher has to do is push on someone's stomach and they get 100% louder and better. Or if we can get them to close their eyes and just "get" the song, that works too.
In real life, I teach an instrument that neither I nor my student can see or touch, and I have to train micro movements in so they can shape sound with their goddamn face.
An Angry Octopus
Chefs.
Any scene where there's service happening, they have time for full conversations, and only work on one dish at a time. All calm, and relaxed..
When chefs actually work the line, we look like an octopus. An angry octopus, who speaks in 4 word sentences. 4 words, 3 languages. "Where's my mise, cabron!?"
Tortured Artist
I'm a painter and sculptor. When I'm depressed, anxious, and dealing with feelings of torment - creation STOPS DEAD IN ITS TRACKS. The tortured, brooding artist as the most prolific and creative being is such a complete lie. Yes, mental illness/disorders are super common in creative people, but that's not what triggers our urge to create, it usually just destroys it. Also, art takes a LOT of fucking time, work, and effort. I don't just pull out all my paints, whip my brush across my surface in a passionate fury, and voila there's a masterpiece. Making art is 30% making the art and 70% thinking about it.
Trashing The G Chord
GiphyGuitarist here. Their hands are usually doing something sooo different from the music that they are playing it's hilarious. Playing a whaling zeppelin solo? Nope. Just trashing the G chord over and over again.
So what ridiculous ways is your job portrayed in the media?
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.