People Who Enter Other Peoples' Homes For A Living Share The Strangest Thing They've Encountered On The Job
What in the world are we hiding in our homes? And why? Every home will eventually need repair and maintenance, so that means strangers who are capable of that will have to visit. And the things that they find... oh my! Now we are all allowed to do what we wish with our lives and private property but that doesn't mean we aren't on the odd side. The cable guys and women are really going through it.Redditor u/theknights-whosay-Ni wanted to hear from all the workers who have encountered some "interesting" situations when doing their jobs on private property by asking.... People who enter homes for a living (Maintenance, cable contractors, etc), what's the strangest thing you've encountered when entering someone's home?
Had a call to help fix a leak.Giphy
I was working as a handyman apprentice. Had a call to help fix a leak.
This guy liked porn. Enough to have posters in a spiral across his living room of girls with their full portfolio showing in each.
Not classy pin ups, raunchy one hand in type. True_Kharma
No Pets. No Way.
I was checking the pipes under the sinks in every apartment in a block. I went into one and I thought the entire place was carpeted until i looked closer and realized the entire floor was covered in a layer of hair. It was probably the most disgusting thing I've ever seen. They didn't have any pets either. Tpmbyrne
I can Smell It.
I've seen plenty of weird artwork or cringe inducing family photos but the strangest was when I worked for a small carpet cleaning company. We got a call from a guy who wanted us to take a look at his basement to see if we could help him with some "stains." I could smell the mold before I even got close to the stairs leading down to the basement.
I walk down there to find out that the stains are actually several fungi that have grown completely through the underpad and carpet. Mold spots were very visible in most of the dry wall too. He apparently though we were going to be able to clean out 3 months of water damage and fungi growth with a steamer. Fungi grown through carpet BrianBoyFranzo
I'm a paramedic in an area that is very open sexually. Walked in to a house and found a sculpture of a woman in bondage who looked to be in her 70's doing some kinky stuff to a male sculpture (both are human size). Walk into the back room and see our patient and realize that the sculptures are of her and her husband from a couple of years ago. DesertMedic66
"Tom Cruise room"Giphy
When I was in high school, I did some house work for hire. The oddest house I ever went to was a guy who had around 40 chainsaws stuck into his front yard and a room full of taxidermied cats.
Worked for another guy who had a "Tom Cruise room" full of cardboard cutouts. I caught him dancing with one once while wearing tie die board shorts and Crocs. naai
Why do people hang erotic pictures of themselves on their bedroom walls?
Also opening a draw to find an 80+ year old ladies sexy lingerie collection while she was standing there smiling.
I'm a bedroom furniture fitter. OmniCapp
weirdest house ever.....
As a paramedic we enter weird peoples houses all the time. We went for a guy that brought us out baggies of air that he said was contaminated. He then required we be brought back into a back room with plastic on the floor, a chair with the bottom cushion taken out and a bathtub. He then horrifically explains that this is his crap chair where he hires women to sit on the chair and shit on him.... weirdest house ever. blaporte093
The maintenance guy in my building told me that he had to go into this really pretty girl's apartment to fix her toilet and when she opened the door, her house was a damn mess and there were poop stained panties all over the floor. Now I can't look at her without thinking about it, and I've never told anyone until now. lilfennec
I do maintenance for an apartment complex and I've seen my share of vibrators, and porn but the oddest so far Is a tie. Another resident had pet chickens 3 of them (evicted shortly after this was found out) and another had a a crap ton of grapefruits everywhere, to the point opening the door all you smell it citrus, bags upon bags on the couch counter lining the walls. There was hardly room to walk around to do my job as there was just grapefruits everywhere. deathsshadow101
I work on the commercial side of our company and go into multiple businesses a day. Around a month ago I go into a gas station for our regular service. I open up the door to the back storage room and the maintenance guy (who is around 65) was standing in the middle of the room buck naked. I stood there for about 2-3 seconds staring trying to process what I walked into. Right when I realized what was happening I slammed the door. Overall he was pretty embarrassed while repeating I'm so sorry. We had a good laugh about it afterwards. sk8erguysk8er
My kitchen once started smelling, and I couldn't figure out where it was coming from until I noticed dark red sludge leaking from underneath the dishwasher. I pulled it out and took it apart to find a brown snake (highly venomous Australian snake) had somehow gotten into the dishwasher, and had been cooked and mangled so it was a pool of intestines, blood and sludge and the last section of the tail had somehow remained intact, so the disembodied tail was still wriggling around. Rik_the_peoples_poet
IN CAGES. FLOOR TO CEILING.
I used to do estimates for a solar energy company. One house I went to in Pennsylvania was an old 1800's farm house. People who lived there seemed normal other than a bunch of clutter all around. That quickly changed... Asked to see their breaker panel in the basement and was led down a winding skinny stair case to a dirt floor basement with no ventilation (doors, windows) and no less than 100+ rabbits.
IN CAGES. FLOOR TO CEILING. ENTIRE PERIMETER OF THE BASEMENT. Kid you not. Felt like I was breathing through a straw because of the ammonia from the rabbit piss and shit that was covering the floor. Asked if they breed and sell rabbits or something and he answers "kinda." I'm positive that was their main food source for the family and rabbit was on the menu every night of the week. NYR410
I deliver pizza. The creepiest thing I ever saw was a corridor in a house lined with pictures/painting of crying children. Just... why?
Another customer had a almost naked life sized world of Warcraft character right behind the door. I jumped the first few times I went to his place. srikos
I was moving ceiling tiles in order to run a new line, and a sex swing fell out. It was bolted into the 8x8 main support.
Needless to say the line I was running took a slight detour. Dontfeedjay
Every day at 3pm.....
We arrive at the house, the owners are gone. We get to cleaning.
We notice they have a lot of seagull memorabilia around the house.
We are then told that the owners have a pet seagull.
Every day at 3pm, they come home and feed a single seagull a hot dog they cook just for it.
And apparently they've been doing this for years. So sure enough, we looked for the seagull but couldn't find one.
3 PM comes around and the owners come home. Right as we are leaving, one lone seagull swoops down, perched on their porch, and they started cooking it's hot dog.
That was interesting to say the least. emf3rd31495
I used to do hvac and one time i went to go fix a guys furnace and he was pretty wasted. He ended up being a interesting guy. He was a pilot and then they let him go for "no reason." was in the army. Very smart but paranoid guy. Always thought we were going to get bombed (i'm from canada).
Anyways when I went downstairs he had a ton of throwing knives and tons of thick wood with holes right through it. He ended up giving me some tips and wrote like 5 pages about how to throw knives and gave it to me and a few free knives. I wish i kept them. Reddit
Not me, but a family friend is a realtor. She usually shows upscale homes to upper class families on the east coast.
She was showing a couple a house, and the husband asked if there was a basement. This wasn't part of the planned tour because the owners listed it as "unfinished."
Our friend told them that the house did indeed have a basement and agreed to show it with the warning that it was unfinished.
Upon getting to the basement she was mortified. It turns out that the current owners shot BDSM porn in the basement so it was outfitted with a whipping station, cages, and toys, the whole 9 yards.
The couple nodded and politely asked to return to the tour to see the rest of the house. The friend now requests to inspect every inch of every house before showing it to potential buyers. maarsargo
I was a cable installer.
I worked all over Southern California.
I had people answer the door with guns, answer the door butt naked, even answer it with someone tied up in the living room (sexually).
One house had a pile of cocaine they were bagging (like double the Scarface pile size). Minters223
Any odd behaviors or schedule?
Cannot confirm the accuracy of this story. My brother in law interned with a law enforcement agency, got close with his supervisors. One of the supervisors told him a story about a time he was a patrol officer in Georgia. They were doing some investigation into a crime (something not super major, like auto theft or something). They knock on this guys door to ask him a couple questions. A young woman answers and says the man isn't home, and that she rents out a room from him. They ask her a few questions, what's this guy like?
Any odd behaviors or schedule? She says, yeah, I'm actually trying to move out of this place, this guy is super weird. She cracks the door open so the officers can see inside. In the living room there is a crockpot full of dildos. She tells them there is a similar crockpot in every room of the house. evgvndr
the lion sleeps tonight....Giphy
I went into a house one time where we were installing security bars in the basement in Detroit. The bars basically blocked off a corner of the basement like a cage. Went into the basement and there was a damn lion chained up down there. Turns out the guy was a drug dealer and used the lion for protection. My boss thought it would be funny to not tell us about it beforehand. WellSum
Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "" to +1 (310) 299-9390 to talk to him about it.
"How does someone so sexy be so damn repulsive, babe?" is one of my favorite lyrics from one of my favorite criminally underrated TV shows, Star. It's from the song Ain't About What You Got (a song which was originally for Ariana Grande, so it's got some vocal leaps) - which basically is the soundtrack to this article.
(Honestly, since Brittany O'Grady is having a moment right now, I'm hoping people will go back and watch. It's got a convoluted plot/dope soundtrack combo, Queen Latifah, multiple murders, some of the strongest hoop earring game ever put on screen and a series ending that made me want to flip tables. It was like Sopranos but with Black & Brown people and the music industry.)
Reddit user rock4lite asked:
Now listen, I'm not gonna tell you to go grab a notebook or the voice note app on your phone because you're about to get some mind-blowing new knowledge.
Most of this boils down to Wheaton's Law.
"Meme Level Advice"Channel 9 Brush GIF by Married At First Sight AustraliaGiphy
"People do not understand how much basic hygiene can make a difference."
"I've been told by incels on this site that 'brushing your teeth, wearing clean clothes that fit, and having good posture is meme level advice and none of that matters.' "
"Well, let me tell you that the folks that actually get in my pants don't think that's meme-level advice. Basics, like clothes that fit and non-stinky breath, can go so far in making anybody way more attractive and approachable!" - LikelyNotABanana
"They consider it meme-level advice because that's what everyone constantly tells them, because they desperately need to do it. If they didn't keep brushing it off dismissively people probably wouldn't say it so often."
"If you ask someone for dating advice and they even mention these things, you absolutely need to do them. I have NEVER heard that said to anyone except to gently suggest they need to wash their ass and not dress like a slob."
"If their argument is 'i dId tHoSe tHiNgS bUt i sTiLl cAnT gEt a dAtE,' they're deliberately ignoring the fact that those things are the bare minimum and that they will still need to put in effort beyond that. Dating advice goes into far more detail elsewhere. No one is even pretending that basic hygiene is a silver bullet to getting laid."
"If someone's dating advice to you starts there, it's because YOU need to start there." - xxpen15mightierxx
Let People TalkDeep Breath Sigh GIF by MOODMANGiphy
"Speaking over me or others, it's not hard to be polite" - n3rd365
"The men of my boyfriend's family all do this constantly."
"I'm not sure it's possible to speak an entire sentence while having dinner with them. It's so discouraging."
"I've always felt very bad for his mother, being the only woman, and never being heard by her own sons/husband." - assortedolives
"I came here to say this. Speaking loud in general is unattractive to me - then when it's OVER someone else, it makes it so much worse." - SunyBunny420
"This is huge for me. I met my current boo because my date brought him along."
"Date kept speaking over his friend and me. The friend was a good listener and great conversationalist. I ditched my date for his friend and we've been together 3+ years." - karmabuchamama
Ex FactorSeason 1 Nbc GIF by The Good PlaceGiphy
"When someone seems to only have 'crazy exes' ... you should run away before the sentence is over." - lurkinarick
"Honestly, bashing multiple exes at any time (there should be zero bashing for the first several dates because honestly idk you well enough & will just assume you're a dude who plays victim 24/7)."
"Once I've gotten to know you better it's okay to open up about a bad relationship or two- but frankly you should be able to not get overly emotional about it (like don't resort to name-calling or mean-spiritedness) or else I'm gonna assume you have not dealt with the fallout."
"I never trust a guy who acts like he's a 'crazy magnet.' Dude, you're the common denominator here, not them." - Crankylosaurus
"A guy once said 'you can't polish a turd' about his ex/kid's mom during a pre-date video chat. I was so put off that I cancelled the date almost immediately after." - science_v_romance
Cruel Is Not CoolRhony GIFGiphy
"Being mean to appear cool." - azcntn
"I know this dude who is like a solid ten in all departments. I constantly joke that he's gonna steal my man, my mom, and the f*cking cats too."
"But the other day he was sharing his rebound stories and kept talking about he was gonna 'break hearts' and 'ruin her.' "
"I was like...bro eeeeew never let a woman hear you say that. You just turned into a sack of potatoes!" - RunanD
Pinnochiodisney classic GIFGiphy
"I remember I dated someone who would just lie to make himself sound cool."
"I remember I realized it when his coworker was telling a hilarious story that I thought happened to my boyfriend. I instantly had this pit in my stomach. Biggest turn off." - makopinktaco
"There's nothing worse. Especially when there's a certain crowd or situation that brings it out. Like chill bro it's not a competition." - Coyote__Jones
"Yes. There was man I thought I was the most solid and reliable and hot as f*ck dude I'd ever met…I found out he'd been lying to me for a long time and it didn't take long for me to be turned off by him."
"Now I see his face and where I used to get all bothered (in a good way) I now just am annoyed and the word 'Coward' flashes across my brain."
"he knew lying was the only way I'd even meet him for coffee to date him. Had he been honest at first I'd never had met him for coffee, much less integrate him into my life, have each other's kids become family to one another, etc."
"He could've chosen to be honest after the initial meeting, too. Instead, he chose continually to omit info, and then as we got to know each other he had to lie more and more to keep me in the dark and maintain his original lie, and then he started lying to to cover other things up (things that were different than the initial lie but rooted in the same kind of bad behavior he consistently engages in.)"
"And then when our conversations about our histories and exes got to a point where he clearly needed to be honest and there was no more hiding to be done, he would suddenly go cold shoulder and stop being supportive of me. Eventually he resorted to gaslighting and subtle psychological abuse in order to make me shut up and not ask him questions, and so he could just keep seeing and flirting with his exes behind my back off and on."
"Nope. Never again." - Logical_Director_280
Table Mannersthe lion king simba GIFGiphy
"I remember a date I had with a guy almost 25 years ago."
"I remember it because we went out to eat at a local pizza restaurant. In the time it took me to eat half a slice, he had vacuumed up the rest of the pie which included loud, open-mouth chewing and belching."
"Chunks of food landed on his shirt. There were snuffling sounds as he shoved food down his maw. I don't remember anything else about that night but his disgusting method of eating. Total deal killer."
"I saw one of our mutual friends last year and she mentioned him. She told me he was heartbroken I never went out with him again and took it really hard at the time."
"I wasn't mean or anything and I never knew he felt so strongly about me. Absolutely no clue."
"But if that was the case, then that means he was probably on his best behavior that night. I can't imagine what worse manners might have come out if I'd seen him again." - DemonaDrache
"Friend of mine went on a date with a bloke in Uni who ordered pulled pork, and ate it like he'd not been fed in months. The moment my friend realized it wasn't going to work was when the guy looked up at him, and he had a smear of BBQ sauce on his forehead like Simba in the Lion King." - TheeAJPowell
Alpha AwfulnessSchitts Creek Ok GIF by CBCGiphy
"Anything related to "alpha male" bull."
"If you tell me you're an 'alpha male' I will assume you have no personality, low self-esteem, are rude, abrasive, self-involved, and terrible in bed." - WrongRedditKronk
"I once had a dude I was actually kind of interested in refer to himself as an "apex sexual predator." I was no longer interested." - newyne
"Last week, I finally mustered up the courage to strike up a conversation with my gym crush after months of glances and smiles."
"He shared his Instagram, which was 'alphamale(his name).' Got over the crush so fast, there was some head-rush." - Biaatchandahalf
Glory DaysSeth Meyers Smoking GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy
"Talking about how hot they used to be like this coworker of mine does."
" 'I used to bike 10 miles a day, do 200 pushups in one go, and I even used to have that V cut, you know...down there.' "
"I'm just trying to send this email, Doug. Please leave me alone." - After-Collar-4582
"This is hilarious."
" 'So I'm not hot but I used to be which means I stopped putting work into myself and you should find that attractive.' "
"WHAT????" - refrainsfrompartakin
"Oh my god, people bragging about how fit they used to be is so obnoxious. Like cool, I used to have breakfast but I ate it." - rileytrodd
"A guy I went to college with would tell anyone who'd listen that he was a swimmer in high school and kept a close up photo of his abs on his phone."
"I can't tell you the number of times I've said, 'Yeah, you've already shown me that photo. Good for you.' " - Justaregularderp
Break Stuff!destroy that 70s show GIF by LaffGiphy
'Being destructive particularly when other dudes or other people are near by. Breaking things on purpose, hitting things that shouldn't be hit like walls or windows or destroying other people's art/property."
"It doesn't make you cool or strong it makes you a wasteful jerk I won't invite back into my life ever again."
"Mostly this came from stories from friends about their friends, stuff I've seen online and personal experiences with my brother."
"I was the only girl in a group of 5 guys when I was like 8 or 9 and all of them were super destructive when they all got together. Otherwise they were great."
"I had a crush on one of them but he was being destructive (I don't remember what he broke) and I quit liking him."
"Also my ex boyfriend's 'friend' destroyed a lot of his stuff, and he'd let him. Including a painting I made my ex for his 16th birthday."
"I was really proud of it and if he didn't want it he could have sent it back." - LessEnthusiasmPlz
Long story short, just calm down, relax, and be cool.
I believe in y'all!
Sixth sense, hunch, spidey senses tingling, or gut feeling: no matter what you call it, we all have had that feeling at one point or another. Not everyone is as in tune with that feeling as some, but when we have that feeling it's important to listen to it. It could be life or death.
Science tells us that there's actual physical feelings associated with the gut feeling due to our gut-brain connection. Signals from our brain can actually cause intestinal signals to bubble up. It can come in a moments notice. Sometimes feeling a little like anxiety or even "hearing" a voice in your head telling you something might be off.
"Research links these flashes of intuition to certain brain processes, such as evaluating and decoding emotional and other nonverbal cues."
We might need to listen to our gut specifically to protect ourselves. It's that intuitive knowledge that keeps humanity alive for centuries.
Antonia Hock, global head of The Ritz-Carlton Leadership Center said:
"Instinct is a powerful data point that can be a treasure trove of untapped generational knowledge in decision making."
Redditors shared their life-saving moments when they listened to their gut and trusted it.
Redditor TheGaySussyBaka asked:
"What's a gut feeling that saved yours or someone else's life?"
Intuition could save a life. Let's read some true stories about gut feelings that made all the difference.
It was worth being late to the party.
"Years ago, my wife and I were driving on the expressway that was under major construction. Traffic had slowed quite a bit and I saw a plume of smoke ahead. As we drew closer, I could see it was the beginning of a Carbeque, but the driver was still in the vehicle."
"I did a death defying move to cross multiple lanes of traffic to pull over, despite my wife's protests about being late to the event we were headed to."
"I approached the car, which was just starting to produce visible fire from the wheel wells and opened the door to the car. The guy was conscious, but in obvious shock and was unresponsive. I had to reach in to unbuckle him and pull him out of the car. Within seconds of me getting him out, the driver's compartment was completely engulfed in flames."
"In that moment, that's what your wife was thinking about?"
"I don't think she had malicious intent. She's just nuts about being everywhere 5 minutes early. She assumed the guy would get out of the car and all would be fine. I didn't get that feeling."
"Tipsy" driving is still drunk driving.
"Do not get into a car with someone who says 'they are just a little tipsy.'"
"The guy who was trying to convince us that he 'was totally fine to drive' didn't die that night but he did have to spend a two years learning to walk again."
"My story isn't as bad as that but I'm pretty sure I saved a friend from getting arrested for drunk driving. She'd been hanging out at my fraternity and had at least a couple drinks. She said she was going to drive to the bar, but I told her I wasn't going to let her and would find someone to drive her. But everybody else had been drinking. I hadn't, but I also didn't have a driver's license at the time (not for nefarious reasons, I just didn't get one until I graduated college)."
"Refusing to let her drive, I told her I would. She got in next to me and even though I hadn't driven in awhile, I drove slowly to the bar. After I pulled in to the spot, I finally noticed that there had been a cop right behind us. Luckily he drove off. But the cops in our college town were notorious jerks and even if she had been below the legal limit, she probably would have been arrested. But she was fine and I drove her back to her apartment after we were done."
"Also later found out that the car I was driving wasn't even hers - it belonged to her sorority sister. So there's a good chance I prevented her a) from getting arrested, b) getting into a bad accident, c) damaging her sorority sister's car or d) all of the above."
"You're really burying the good part."
"You prevented her from possible troubles by driving a stolen car without a license right in front of a cop."
Listen to your parental gut feeling.
"My son has leukemia and is on chemotherapy. He was just...off. Looked paler than usual and something just felt odd. Turns out chemo had obliterated his blood so much it might as well have been water and he would have died within days. Two blood transfusions, five days hospital and two weeks off chemotherapy and he was on the mend."
"I went into traumatic shock and the one thing that pulled me out was a debrief with my doctor, who told me I had just saved my child's life with my maternal instinct and never doubt it. Fast forward a few months and he got an infection and that same odd feeling woke me up. He spent a week in hospital that time."
"Parental instinct is there for a reason. Don't doubt it. When you feel it, it's not like feeling a concern or worry that something might be wrong... it's a deep primal knowing."
"My wife had the same thing happen with our 3rd kid. 3 days old. Something was off for her. She had a feeling, called the pediatrician and tested his blood sugar with her kit since she was a gestational diabetic. It was in the basement. Like the oh f**k basement. Verge of coma basement. Doc had us call 9-11 and they would have life-flighted him to a bigger hospital had the weather not sucked a**. Spent 9 days in the NICU. Now he's a wild 5-year-old boy. She 100% saved his life."
"When I worked in peds, this was the mantra among the nursing staff. If mom (or dad) thinks something is wrong, something is wrong! You know your kid better than anyone else in the world."
"This is so true! When I had appendicitis, my doctor tried to send me home saying it was the flu. If my mom hadn't insisted something was seriously wrong, I might be dead. It was hours from rupturing when they removed it."
A near miss.
"Scenario- driving myself and 2 coworkers back from lunch. Didn't immediately go when my light was green as I got this weird knot in my stomach like something was gonna go down. Car next to me went forward and got slammed into a brick building and post by a speeding car that went thru his red. Some debris rained on my car but basically was left unscathed. Shook but unscathed."
"My friends make fun of me for this, bc the 'light is green lol' but I've been involved in that type of accident, and am only alive because my dad, who was driving saw it in time to slam the gas and make them only hit the bed of the truck."
The man in the truck.
"This is before cell phones (think beepers). I went out one night and was meeting my bestie half way between my house and hers. I noticed this truck drive by me and he slowed down to a crawl. Another car was coming so he kept going. My spidey senses were triggered though. I saw my best friend and I grabbed her and pulled her into an old shed at an abandoned house. I shut the door quick and told her to be quiet. There was a space so we were able to see this truck coming."
"She is whispering rapidly to me asking what is happening. I told her that I had seen that guy a few minutes before and he made me nervous. He slowly crept down the street, pulled over and got out with a flashlight. That's when we saw the gun. The most terrifying thing, it was only moments, but felt like hours. He finally took off, but I was hesitant to leave yet. We stayed there for about 15-20 minutes and he came back 4 or 5 times."
"Finally we heard our names being called, her older brother and his best friend had come looking because it typically takes 10 minutes to get from my house to hers. I am convinced that she and I would both be dead if it wasn't for that shed and me trusting my spidey senses."
Caught it just in time.
"Was hanging out with my brother who was visiting from a few hours away. We went to one of his highschool friends house to shoot the sh*t."
"My brother's friend had a kid who was literally bouncing off the walls. After one bounce I heard a little scrape behind me. I looked behind me to see the 8 point deer head mounted to the wall just in time for another bounce."
"I snatched that head out of the air just about 3 inches from giving the kid 4 stab wounds to the skull."
"I was at a party my house was hosting back in the day. We had a back area that had a door leading to the backyard, the door swung inwards. Someone was bent over putting their shoe on and I heard someone coming up the stairs to come in. As soon as the handle started turning, I put my hand over the door to stop it coming in. The person putting on their shoe was so shocked because no one else noticed the door opening and their head was right near the handle. Maybe not exactly saving a life, but a solid concussion at least."
"Peacefully riding my motorcycle."
"'I don't think that guy is going to stop for that stop sign. I'll slow down just a little bit so he'd miss me if he didnt.'"
"Guy flys through intersection at 100km/h."
"'God wanted me to live this day, I see.'"
There are a few things you'll need to do to learn how to trust your gut. Part of it is recognizing when your gut is trying to send you signals. Body awareness, emotional awareness and cognitive processing is something that can happen intuitively, but we have to know how to recognize it.
Pay attention to when it is intrinsically emotional or when it might be clouded by bias. Know the difference so you can make choices that make the most sense for the situation.
And practice! Find ways to listen to your body and emotions and put the skills to the test.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Any engaged couple looks forward to the big day when after months of planning, they get to tie the knot and declare their love in front of family and friends.
What could possibly go wrong?
It turns out there are so many variables that can contribute to making the bride and groom's celebration a major matrimonial miss.
Curious to hear examples of weddings gone wrong, Redditor lolf**kno asked:
"Those who have been to a ruined wedding, what happened?"
Dramatic brawls and speeches plagued these weddings.
Catty Attendees And Booze
"Very beautiful wedding in a huge barn at this apple orchard. They must have spent a ton of money on the decorations and catering because it looked like something out of a magazine. The ceremony was great, the flower girl did her thing, the vows got everyone choked up. Everything seemed to be going well. Not even 15 minutes into the reception the mothers of the bride and groom getting into a full out brawl, hair pulling, red wine being thrown. Their sons jump in to defend their honor, chairs start being throw, tables are flipped, parents are grabbing children and running for their lives."
"The bride and groom are horrified and leave immediately and head back their honeymoon suite. My fiancé and I left after this as well but we heard from some other friends that most people ended up staying and getting wasted at the open bar on the bride and groom's dime. Apparently, the fight started because one of the groom's sister complimented the bride's grandmother's dress. The bride's mom thought she was being sarcastic and called her a b*tch, then the drama ensued. Mind you they had all been pregaming the wedding pretty hard."
Playing For The Drunk Uncle
"I played a wedding where as we started playing the set, everyone ran outside and nobody was to be seen for the rest of the night."
"I originally assumed it was because nobody liked us but the bride came in afterwards and said there was a huge fight involving multiple members of both families and everyone basically went home upset, injured or in a police van."
"We couldn't stop playing since we were payed and it was our job, and the only person watching was the drunk uncle dancing on his own asking for requests we didn't know."
Maid Of Honor Speech Goes Off The Rails
"Was a guest of friend of the bride, did not know anyone attending. Very expensive over the top place, several hundred guests of this very Italian wedding. Maid of honor grabs mic at the cocktail hour begins her speech, rambling, drunk. Quickly devolves to stating the recently deceased mother of the bride was against this wedding and that's basically what killed her. Plus Vinny will never give up sex workers. She is tackled by several people and dragged away."
"The happy couple is separated and divorced within a year."
This is what happens when bad luck crashes weddings.
Tumbling Into The Sunset
"I work at a golf course with a lot of history behind it. We do wedding venues inside the clubhouse and the actual ceremony is held outside by the historic water fountain and large pond."
"First problem was the weather. I live in the high desert and it was very warm. A solid 90 degrees that day and it was also pretty windy. So everyone's outside, no umbrellas, no ezups."
"The next problem, and probably the worst, was the golf cart incident. The bride and groom wanted to 'ride into the sunset' on one of our golf carts. Drive around a little bit on the golf course. To be fair, it is beautiful on the course during sunset. However the cart had somehow gotten a nail in the tire, tire went flat, battery on the cart went crazy and the cart ended up freaking out. It came to an complete stop from 15mph to zero. The wheels and mechanisms locked up, almost seizing. Both the bride and groom (fairly overweight mind you) both fell out and rolled over a few times. They were totally okay, just a few bruises and perhaps a bruised ego or two. So retrieving that cart was fun."
"And last but not least, the power inside the clubhouse went out to do the high winds. There was no after party available. Only the cake was cut, hardly any food was given out. Yeah, not a great day to cover for someone on your day off."
"I was not born yet, but my parents rented the observation deck on the Hancock building in Boston for their reception. Tallest building in the city, beautiful view. My dad pored over historic weather charts to figure out what day was statistically most likely to be nice out. Day of the wedding comes and of course, thick fog unlike anything they'd ever seen before. Couldn't see a thing out the windows of the room they had picked specifically for the view."
"Worked out well though, they were happily married for nearly 30 years before cancer took my dad's life a few years ago."
"There's one other funny anecdote from that wedding: The wedding was held in Kings Chapel, which is an incredibly historic church here in downtown Boston that's somewhat of a major tourist attraction. To close that on a weekend afternoon for a wedding, it turns out, was not very expensive. The tourists waiting outside to see the church didn't know that, though, and someone started the rumor that my parents were incredibly wealthy, maybe even Kennedys. As a result, there were tons of people taking photos of them when they left the ceremony. Not sure if any of them ever figured out that my parents were most certainly not rich or famous."
"I was best man at my sister in laws wedding (stepped in for the brother of the groom, that's another story entirely)."
"For a whole year of planning all the bride (SIL) wanted was a dove release while they said handwritten vows to each other. Very small, non denominational (most of the family are atheist anyway) wedding."
"Day arrives (early summer) and something is off with the bird handlers. They show up a bit late and are sourcing help from the wedding party to get everything in line. When the time comes to say their vows I help the handler carry the chest with the doves in it over to what is to be the altar where the bride and groom are standing."
"Vows are just about wrapping up and the handler gives ME the signal to open the chest. I open it and see 20-30 DEAD DOVES IN THE CRATE!!!! I immediately close it to try and limit who knows what happened. Too late. The look of horror on the bride's was all that was needed. We spent the next few hours trying to cheer everyone up but by the end of the reception the entire wedding party had organized and filed animal cruelty complaints on the handler. It was all anyone could focus on."
Tragic losses unfortunately befell leading up to or at a couple's nuptials.
The Wedding Guest Who Left Too Soon
"When I was 6 or 7 I went to a cousin's wedding. Everything was fabulous for little me, so much sugar everywhere, basically heaven. The reception was in a big community center that was reserved for the occasion. Went to the girls' bathroom, passing by the men's room to see my uncle on the floor. Went back to the main room to tell my dad my uncle was looking weird. Well, uncle had a stroke and had died."
"The bride spent the rest of the afternoon crying, and everyone except close family left."
"Bright side is the mariage is still going strong 20 years later, despite what happened that day."
A Terminal Diagnosis
"Leading up to my friends wedding his father had been battling cancer after a terminal diagnosis. And it was touch and go whether he would be well enough to attend the wedding, in the end he was too unwell to attend despite wishing that he could."
"Just as we got to the wedding reception my friend was informed that his father had just passed away. It was devastating."
"Happened to my classmate. He is successful middle level manager, divorced, about 35yo or so. Found a girl of his dreams but from a provincial poor town. The girl insisted to have the wedding in her town to show off her 'success.' The wedding is crashed by her old friends including male friends who are not that sophisticated and have some tense feelings towards the successful groom from the city. Somebody starts a fight in the middle of wedding, groom is trying to stop it and got stabbed in the back. Died right there. And he was my classmate."
An Unfortunate Trespassing
"The wedding was at a state park that's famous for its giant gorge/waterfall. I don't know whose idea this was, but someone suggested a photo overlooking this gorge and everybody was game. The wedding party went around a stone security barrier and the maid of honor literally fell off the cliff to her death. It was like 500+ feet."
With a lot riding on a wedding to go off without a hitch, the mounting pressure is one where something is surely to buckle.
And because wedding guests are usually inebriated and high on the buzz of celebration, they throw caution to the wind and make some choices they wouldn't make under normal circumstances.
People's ill-advised actions can have regretful consequences, but no one expects death to be an outcome.
Fortunately, the weddings I've attended or heard about from friends were not as catastrophic as the anecdotes mentioned above.
While the Redditors' stories are sorrowful, it gives me a sense of relief these devastating examples are rare occurrences.
Sometimes I think back to a teacher I had when I was a kid who demanded to know whether any of us were "raised in a barn" in response to crappy behavior. Namely littering. She hated littering. Can you blame her? It's a horrible habit and some people do it with no sense of shame. She dedicated much of her time to telling students to pick up after themselves and dispose of things properly. For that, I'm thankful.
But why didn't anyone else get the memo? The trash I see on the streets is obscene.
People had lots of thoughts to share after Redditor SneakyStriedker876 asked the online community,
"What seemingly uncivilized thing is commonplace in society?"
"We delight in the deaths of others as long as we feel it was justified. But when the reverse happens we act all high and mighty like we wouldn't engage in the same behavior."
"Slaughtering each other..."
"Slaughtering each other via warfare to solve political differences. It's standard policy worldwide."
Indeed it is. And it seems impossible to stop.
"Littering. Especially dropping cigarette butts on the ground/flicking them out the window.
The world is not your personal ashtray/garbage bin."
Every now and then I find new trash in my yard and I am constantly amazed by how nasty people can be.
"Mobbing someone because of their opinion or for a comment they made a long time ago, even if that time was yesterday."
"Xenophobia. The fact that racism and racial violence still exist is an indicator that we're still tribal primates in fancy clothes."
And it makes no sense! It's not based in reality. We are truly a tribal species.
"Shouting while arguing, refusing to listen to the opinions of others, basically the inability to debate and maintain proper communication."
"Letting people die..."
"Letting people die of curable conditions simply because they can't afford healthcare."
Probably the biggest reason why much of the Western world looks at the United States with shame in their eyes.
"Parents forcing their kids to hug family/friends despite the kid being uncomfortable doing it. They feel uncomfortable for a reason."
"During the holiday season..."
"During the holiday season, customers take products off of our online fulfillment carts. Y'all have legs. Get your own."
"Using phone speakers..."
"Using phone speakers in public. I don't care what you and your friend think about that restaurant, or how much that Spotify jam speaks to you. Nobody else wants to hear it."
We truly need to stop all of these, don't you think?
Have some opinions of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments below!
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.