Being a police officer means making judgement calls on the fly. If you're in the line of fire, with your partner relying on you, you need to know what to do. Sometimes, though, the answer isn't always clear and you see a woman riding down the street on a motorized sofa...
So, that's what these stories are about.
Reddit user, u/A-Deadly-Man123, wanted to hear when the law wasn't clear when they asked:
Should We Go And Get Their Car?
Some family reported their car as stolen. When I asked them to come to the station for the hearing, they just told me It was never stolen, they left it in a car dealer to be sold, the business went wrong and the dealer would not pay them what they wanted or return the car. So they reported It stolen "because that way the police will get the car back faster".
They were very simple people and I figured a way not to screw them over this.
How Fast Should We Be Going?
GiphyDriving above the posted school zone speed limit when the sign states "20mph when children are present". Well then what constants present? Children inside the school? Children playing well away from the road in the fenced in yard? Just school hours in general? During after school sports and activities?
No idea so unless someone's blatantly reckless and an a--hole, I won't stop people for driving over the posted 20.
Can They Go Around, And Around, And Around...?
Repeatedly driving around a round-a-bout, like 25 times in a row.
Edit: Where I am in Australia (QLD) it is not illegal.
Judging by the comments it seems to be illegal in Switzerland and Germany, and some US state.How Do You Drive, Again?
You can turn left on a red light from a one way street to another one way street in most states (and provinces - for us Canadian boys). You need to stop and yield just like a right turn on a red light.
It does seem illegal when you do it though.
In Defense Of Homer, You Shouldn't Do That
Saw a kid drop a donut on the ground.
Nearly radioed for backup before I remembered I could tell the kid to be more careful with his food.
"Should I...Pull Him Over?"
My friend since I was like 5 ended up becoming a cop and he told me that he once saw a guy towing a boat down the road without a trailer...so it was just dragging. He pulled him over but admitted that he wasn't sure why.
And then he consulted with a state trooper because they know a lot of obscure traffic laws, and even he admitted that he didn't know what violation, if any, could be written up. Apparently it was a junk boat and the guy was going to scrap it so he wasn't concerned with ruining the boat.
Is She Technically Driving?
Drunk lady had many DUI's and got her license revoked. Drunk lady owns horses. Drunk lady rides horse to nearest bar. "Too far to drive the mower" as she put it.
Cops were unsure of what to do.
"If They Don't Have A Pulse...Does It Count?"
Dealt with a guy that was smacking around a sex doll and it got called in as a domestic.
I showed up and he had the doll sitting at the kitchen table and had purposely smeared fake mascara to make it look like she was crying. He said he gets off on that sort of thing. I was only 1 year into the job at the time and remember being like "wtf" this has to be illegal. Turns out it wasnt. Still feel disturbed by that sh-t when I reflect on it.....
"Who Is In The Wrong?"
Guy had sex with a prostitute. Guy does not pay the prostitute.
Prostitute wanted to file a report for not receiving payment.
"Can They Legally Stop Me?"
Store owner refusing me to use their public restroom because I had not bought anything yet.
Is This Technically Parking?
GiphyHad a sea plane land in the harbor, taxied up the boat ramp and parked in a parking lot while also paying the meter while they went for lobster rolls.
Apparently its legal.
Wait, It's Legal Now...
Every time I walk down the street and see/smell someone smoking pot. I know it is legal now but my brain still thinks it is illegal for about the first two seconds.
"Ma'am, Do You Have A License For That...Sofa?"
Driving a motorized sofa down the road to the store to buy beer.
I honestly have no f-cking clue how the courts will classify mobility sofas when it comes to traffic laws and open beer laws. Told the reclining driver same, and advised he treat his couch like a pedestrian and only drive on the sidewalk, without any open alcoholic beverages.
Are you a police officer that's ever been confused by the law? Let us know about it!
"What words/phrases do you hear someone say and immediately know you’re probably not going to like the person?"
Is It Even Love?
"'Tough love' often seems to be used as an excuse to be a dick. I get it when it's like an intervention, but most times I've personally heard it this was just people who wanted to start sh*t." -Reddit
That Could Be ONE Reason...
“'People don’t like me because I tell it like it is'.”- MassiveProductions
Taking Others Down Is No Way To Pick Yourself Up...
"If a person humiliates others for the sake of boosting his own ego, I immediately stop communicating with that person."- AnastasiaFrid
mean girls ugh GIFGiphyOr Just Brutal?
“I’m brutally honest”- -not-pennys-boat-
And That's A Problem Because...?
“You’re so quiet”- WearyPigeon
Not Everyone Likes Their Family...
"'We're a family here' in a work setting."
"Mother f*cker you just laid off 'cousin' Bill."- recoil669
Hbo Are We Doing This GIF by SuccessionHBOGiphyIf You Think It Might Cause Offense, Then Maybe Don't Say It?
“'No offense, but…', just before saying the most offensive thing you’ve heard in your life."- lisathethrowaway
A Disability Should Never Be A Punch
“'I’m so bipolar' to explain why they are indecisive or to play off poor life choices."
"Or just to say to sound quirky."
"Really hate that."
"I’m bipolar and rarely tell anyone."- PerplexedPoppy
Then Don't Cause Any!!!
"'I hate drama'."
"I have never heard someone say this, unsolicited, and not been exhausted with their shenanigans within a day."- Spodson
Drama Reaction GIF by MOODMANGiphyDefinitely Not Something To Brag About...
"Describes himself as an Alpha Male."
"Tells you implausible stories about how tough he is/how many women he's 'Banged'."
"Yeah, me and you gonna fall out soon buddy."- Johhnymaddog316
Should I?
"'Do you know who I am?'"- Brave_D*ck
A Handshake Is Always The Best Place To Start...
"Where’s my huuuuug?"
"Immediately no."- xPunkdaddy
Come Austin Powers GIFGiphyNever A Good Sign If They Always Need To Declare Who They Are...
"As an empath --"- paramidia
"Good vibes only and 'I’m such an empath'."- Blacklotusispunk
Where To Even Begin...?
"'Why didn't they just take the eagles to Mordor?'"- Calligaster
lord of the rings no GIFGiphyThere's a reason our parents told us to choose our words carefully.
Sometimes the things people say can cause more pain and harm than physical violence of any kind.
Redditor Educational-Coast304 wanted to hear the most creative ways we've all been picked up, so they asked:
"What’s the best pickup line you’ve ever heard?"
There is no magic line for me.
But I'm a lifelong pessimist.
Let's Play
Marcus Scribner Comedy GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy"When I was teaching kindergarten, one of my students (who knew I love video games) dropped this one on me..."
“'You’re pretty. You should come to my house after school and we can play Little Big Planet. My mom makes great snacks.'”
"His mom and I had a good laugh about it at pick-up time."
donkeyuptheminaret
The Mice
"This girl I used to work with and I went to a bar after work and we’re having fun, and she leans over to tell me a joke. And she says..."
"3 boy mice and a girl mouse were all stuck in a room with no doors and no windows. One of the boy mice asked the girl mouse how to get out and she said 'Sleep with me tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning.'"
"Next day he is gone. The 2nd boy mouse asks the girl mouse how he got out and she says, 'Sleep with me tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning.'"
"Next day, he’s gone too."
"So now the girl telling me this joke says to me. 'Do you want to know how the last mouse gets out of the box?' And I say 'yes.' And she says, 'Sleep with ME tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning.' All this while staring me in the eyes and smiling.
"I said,' 'Check please bartender!!' I forgot to ask her in the morning, but that was the best pickup line I’ve ever heard."
reb678
Tequila
"A woman once told me 'Every time I drink tequila I wind up sleeping with someone' and then proceeded to take a shot of tequila while holding eye contact with me."
Thefuturehasbears
"LOL, I was on a date in Hawaii and she said 'Tequila either makes me h**ny or angry' and I replied 'Don’t be angry, be the other one' and she went to buy us more tequila shots."
"I was so drunk I fell asleep on the car ride and she dropped me off."
Scytherx781
"They said ‘best pickup line’ not ‘best drop off line’ lol."
chalmedtomeetyou
That Kid
"I was at my friend's house and his 5-year-old brother grabbed one of our friends by the hand and asked if he could play her a song on his guitar. She said yes, he picked up his guitar but stopped just before strumming it, thought for about 30 seconds, and said 'I don't know any songs for princesses.'"
"That little kid had way more game that 19-year-old me had."
physics515
Miam GIF by philoyoloGiphy"When I was a student at University, I saw a pretty girl eating a particular brand of yogurt in the crowded dining hall before morning classes."
"I had the same brand of yogurt on my tray. I asked if I could sit at her table and she nodded. I looked across the table at her and pointed at her yogurt and said with a big shmucky smile 'Yoplait or mine?' It was said with humor and not as a pickup line. I ended up marrying that pretty girl. Amazing, given the horrible first line."
cblatnik
This is why I have never trusted any Yogurt.
Convince me otherwise!
I'm Hungry!
hungry feed me GIFGiphy"It’s not a pickup line as such, but this guy once said to me in passing, 'GIIIIRRRLL, I wanna feed you STEAK and GRAPES!' and I have never forgotten."
PicardiB
Wanna Share?
"Once was at a festival where an org was giving out free condoms at a booth. One of the ladies is talking to a guy and a girl saying 'the condoms are free by the way, take as many as you want... oh but we don't have unlimited stock so please don't take more than you need.'"
"The girl picks up a condom, turns to the guy, and says 'Wanna share?'"
getyourshittogether7
The Frost
"It was the first snowfall of the season. The person and I were walking around campus together - we were friends who were heading out to grab a snack in between classes. We were quietly walking when the person suddenly said to me: 'The snow looks beautiful today.' In my native language, my name means snow/frost/ice. Turned out they were hitting on me and I didn't realize until later."
Confident_Cell_1350
Over the Shoulder
"On Halloween, a buddy of mine was dressed as a Viking. He asked a girl if she wanted to hear his Viking pickup line. She said yeah. So he literally picked her up and threw her over his shoulder and said he was taking her back to the boat. They dated for almost a year."
Lines
"Take note that many of the best 'lines' are not openers, but are relevant follow-up comments once you are already in the flow and have a friendly rapport. And they are not really 'lines' per se, so much as situationally appropriate wit and timing (which are always attractive). Always better to just be present and focus on connection and context, not memorizing and saving a particular line for some future situation that may never come."
lurque
SCORE!!!
Moon Walk Dance GIFGiphy"At a college Halloween party, I was dressed up as Kazooie (although everyone assumed I was an angry bird) and I walked up to a woman dressed up as a golfer and told her that she could score a birdie tonight."
thepasz
Halloween is always an issue.
There are better holidays to meet people.
Curious to hear from strangers online about their teenage years, an anonymous Redditor asked:
"What was 'the incident' at your high school?"
Major school incidences ranged from the bizarre to tragedy.
Prank Gone Wrong
"Senior prank, someone dumped a few hundred pounds of flour and yeast into the school indoor pool, in hopes of turning it into a giant glob of dough (I guess). It didn’t work, just caused about 100K damage to plumbing, pumps, filters, etc. Prankster never caught."
– Sea_Ganache620
Cruel Morning
"In high school Two kids both named Logan. Both last names were very similar. One was popular and the other was not. Unpopular Logan was drunk and ran across a road in the middle of the night and was killed by a semi-truck."
"The next day the principal announced that popular Logan had died. Popular Logan was late for school."
"Everyone was very sad. Then popular Logan showed up and all school rejoiced that unpopular Logan was the one who died. Was f'ked up."
– AggressiveSmoke4054
Sudden Death
"A sophomore (my classmate) dropped unconscious in gym class and was rushed to the hospital. 3 days later they took him off life support and he died from a brain aneurysm."
"Edit to add: his funeral was held in the high school gym and damn near everyone went. Never in my life did I think I’d attend a funeral AT school."
– DisappointmentToMost
In The Nick Of Time
"A friend of mine in high school had a brain aneurysm, also as a sophomore. He'd been complaining for a few days about sudden, brief, very intense headaches. He was on the JV football team and went to play a game. Took a hard tackle and the aneurysm ruptured."
"That actually turned out to be the luckiest possible time for it to happen, because the school always had an ambulance on call at the side of the field during football games, so he was in the hands of EMTs within a minute of people realizing something was wrong. He was rushed to the hospital, they removed part of his skull to reduce the pressure on his brain and he spent a week or two in an induced coma. But in an absolute damn miracle, he made about as complete of a recovery as one can from that kind of injury; the only long-term effect was some very minor loss of muscle control in the left side of his face, so his smile was a little crooked."
"That was back in 2000."
"He just died three weeks ago from an accidental drug overdose."
– Lachwen
Lockdown
"A kid came to school with a machete and tree saw and slashed 7 students the day before Thanksgiving break."
"And a girl fell through the gym’s acoustic ceiling tiles and had to wear a halo."
– usfgirl1020
Incidences were not limited to just the students.
Murder
"A science teacher was beaten, chased and fatally set on fire by her husband who then shot himself."
– Fracture_98
Domestic Violence
"A teacher at the school I attended was being chased by her abusive husband. She drove to a police station with him following and tried to go inside but the doors were locked (it was some holiday). He shot her dead there and drove off. After that they made a rule to always have someone on staff and the doors unlocked."
– TheW83
There's no avoiding the brutal shaming that accompanies the high school experience.
Special Gym Class
"We had so many pregnant teen girls that they had their own gym class."
"A friend of mine who had a fake leg— he had a solid metal rod from mid thigh to mid calf from childhood leukemia so he couldn’t bend at the knee, was in the same class. Just this one poor guy and 30 pregnant 16 year olds."
"I was a teenager in the late 90s and grew up in the southeastern United States. It was a suburban area where a ton of people (still) identify as Evangelical Christians, it’s also called the Bible Belt. The required sex education classes didn’t teach anything but 'Just Say No' so there were girls who thought jumping up and down would prevent pregnancy. Not kidding. These were really sheltered girls who would attend Purity Dances, so it was quite a scandal that so many were pregnant at the same time. Most of the baby daddies were just dumb teenage boys who didn’t know the facts of life."
"Remember that there was no internet at this point so it’s not like teens could get information on their own especially if they were from a super religious background. A girl on my street was 'sent away' to live with an aunt when she got pregnant."
"Also, the pregnant girl gym class was technically for the physically disabled kids, hence why my friend was the lone guy in the class."
"His leg, from what he explained to me, had cancer in the bones of his knee. They didn’t want to amputate his whole leg so they removed the knee and grafted a rod in place— this would have been back in the late 80s so I’m sure they do stuff differently now."
– Malicious_Tacos
Students Can Be So Mean
"a girl had an epilepsy attack and she lost control of her bowels. Not a pretty sight."
"Mean girls type made fun of her, and she transferred to another high school."
– StuntCockofGilead
Teenagers deserve more credit than they're given.
These days, they are forced to grow up fast and learn important life lessons earlier than their parents like for them to experience due to various circumstances unfolding on campus.
If they can survive high school, they can survive almost anything in life past graduation.
