Police Officers Share The Most Ridiculous Story They've Heard From Someone In Questioning.
Officer, I swear it wasn't me! It was... the cat!
Thanks to the awesome folks on Reddit who contributed to this post.
1/22. I was with the officer when this happened.
Some kids were shooting bottle rockets, no big deal, but they were in an area where there had been some burglaries, so we checked it out.
There were three of them when we pulled up, maybe 14 years old. Here's the thing though, they were pretty well cornered. On one side was a pond where we could easily catch them, on another side was a huge fence with barbed wire, and finally there was one side with an unclimbable embankment that lead to some rail road tracks. Like I said, we had them cornered.
Two of them take off for the embankment and hide in the trees/grass, while one runs towards the fence.
Well the two that ran for the embankment were pretty well hidden, but Mr. Solo realized the fence had barbed wire, panicked, and decided to lay flat on his belly in ankle high grass hoping we couldn't see him.
We walked up and asked him to get to his feet. Nothing. We repeated the directions. Do you know what he did?
He rolled over, faked the biggest yawn he could muster and started stretching this way and that. Then he asked "Sorry, what? I was just sleeping."
The whole scene was too funny, so the officer and I start hysterically laughing, tell the kid he's not in trouble, and remind him not to run from the police.
This kid really thought he could pretend he just woke up from a nap, after we had just watched him sprint across the field and lay down. Good times.
2/22. Caught a woman stealing, she said it was her twin.
"What's your twin's name?" I asked.
"Jen."
I looked at her ID.
"That's your name," I said.
"Oh...yeah."
3/22. A couple said they were camping.
No camping gear. 1 piece of luggage with their clothes. Completely clean vehicle interior. Didn't know the name of their campsite. Mexican license plates... that did not belong to the vehicle they were driving. I opened their vehicle and what did I find?
(Continue reading on the next page...)
I opened their vehicle and what did I find? 300 lbs of weed in the panels of the vehicle.
4/22. I'm Air Force Security Forces (Air Force MP).
One day I got dispatched to a call about a guy stealing little bottles of wine from the class six store (the store that sells alcohol, guns, car parts, tools, sporting goods, that kind of stuff). Well I get there, handcuff the guy, get statements from the manager and cashier, and then search the guy before I put him in my car to go back to the squadron. Well while searching him, I found a total of 30 mini bottles on him. 30. I know our uniforms have a lot of pockets, but damn. Anyways, the entire time he's claiming that he didn't do anything wrong, he wasn't stealing them, blah blah blah. The he said it. "I swear to God sir, those were water when I put them in there, Jesus must've turned them into wine"
5/22. In interview with a woman for shop lifting (we have CCTV of her shoplifting then walking out, she was wearing the same clothes as she was in the CCTV)
"I didn't go in"
We have CCTV showing you going in and stealing.
"No you don't"
It's here 'goes to click play'
"No don't click play I don't wanna watch it, it's not me go away"
So what did you do?
"I went in to try on some makeup"
You just said you didn't go in?
"I didn't"
Rightttttttt...
6/22. Was watching cops one time, buddy told the cop he thought the bag of blow in his pocket was sugar and he found it on the ground and ya know, you're not just gonna leave a bag of free sugar on the ground.
(Continue reading on the next page...)
7/22. Of course there is the classic "these aren't my pants" when there is dope in the pockets.
I also revived a heroin overdose who woke up and commenced trying to convince me he was shooting insulin. In to his arm. After cooking it on a spoon I guess?
8/22. Paramedic here. A guy overdoses while speedballing, girlfriend calls 911. Engine company narcans him before I got there, reverses the heroin but now he's in full blown coke mania. During the course of a healthy and productive debate about his transport to the hospital, he swears up and down that he didn't do heroin (track marks, needles, history, empty slabs in the room.)
Once we got him in the truck, he tells me that he totally didn't do heroin, but he suddenly remembered what happened.
"I was playing a game with with girlfriend where we have sex, and I pretend to be unconscious and overdosed."
9/22. "That's not marijuana sir, I was just getting some chives from the neighbor so my girlfriend could make soup"
10/22. A guy I caught masturbating in a park. His excuse was "I needed to check it was still working"
11/22. Stop a car for a traffic violation. Male driver. Female passenger. Ask for both of their IDs because neither have a seatbelt on. Driver says he doesnt have a DL but gives me a name. I ask him who the female is sitting next to him and he says her name is Danielle and shes his wife. Ask her to spell her full name and she tries to tell me her first name is Sarah. Ask the guy for vehicle registration and he says it's not his car. Ask who the car belongs to and he just says "Gary".
(Continued on the next page...)
I ask for Garys last name and he doesnt know it. Ask where Gary is and he tells me Gary is in Long Beach. Long Beach, CA? Yeah. We're 2000 miles away from Long Beach. Guy tells me Gary is letting him test drive it because he might buy it.
They both had felony warrants and a few pounds of meth was in a fake keg of Heineken in the back seat.
12/22. Not a cop but anyways. My friends and I got busted for something in a very Catholic country by a very Catholic cop. Before getting carted off we are being given a bit of rough housing and threats in our hotel room. We are all in the room together and I made the sign of the cross to testify that I wasn't lying. The cop takes a step back asks me if I'm Catholic and I say yes (I'm not). Things start getting a bit of easier for me apart from a light "you should be a better Catholic boy" speech. The cop turns to my friend and asks him the same question.
My friend hasn't picked up on much of what just went on and says "Protestant" (he kinda is). Things got a lot worse for him very fast! Suddenly he's the only one that's committed any crime and is suddenly "stupid" as well. It's basically the worst thing you could have said at that moment.
13/22. Some guy had stolen a duck and was plucking its feathers out on the riverbank, cop goes up to him and asks what he's doing, guy tells him he's teaching his pet duck to swim and he's just minding it's clothes...
14/22. Summer of 1990.
We had just pulled into a nice dark corner of a subdivision that was under construction. The radio was quiet, and we had a ton of reports to catch up on, so we blacked out and took advantage of the quiet to get caught up.
After about 20 min, we get a call on the local channel from another car out on the interstate with a traffic call (speeding). They're like, "Uh, you guys gotta come over here and see this." We tell them nah, we're busy trying to knock out these reports. They come back again, "NO, you REALLY have to come out here and see this, REALLY!"
So we go ahead and head on over. We roll up on the stop, and there is a black '89 Probe, and two teens in handcuffs standing at the back of the car.
(Continued on the next page...)
We get out of the cruiser, and we then proceed to notice the 5 cell phones on the trunk (Remember, this is 1990...these were big honking things.) and two HUGE wads/rolls of cash.
Needless to say, our interest is VERY piqued.
The officer who had the stop, motions to the passenger side of the car, and says, "Take a look..". So we do, and find a white powdery substance all over the floorboard of the passenger side.
We're thinking, JACKPOT!
The whole time, the kids are saying, "It's Flour, It's flour!" and we're just chuckling and saying, "Yeah, suuure it is.."
We get some evidence baggies, bag up the phones and the money, and some of the substance, so that we can take it back to the station to test it.
As we get back to the station, the officer who had the stop originally, takes the kids into interrogation, while me and my partner head over to the area we kept the test kits. Now, they aren't much different nowdays, than they were back then, just bigger, and didn't have the range of things you could test for.
My partner takes some of the substance, drops it in the test kit, cracks the glass tubes.......and no reaction. We look at each other, and say at the same time, "Bad test." So he grabs another...same thing. We do one more test just to be safe, and again, no reaction. At this time we head on over to interrogation, to let the officer on the stop know that it's not drugs, and as we walk into the room, the teens are telling their story.
Well, what they were doing was basically selling baking soda and flour to crackheads over on the other side of the river (really bad area). We're all standing there with our eyes about the size of dinner plates, from the stupidity of these two. How they didn't end up shot or murdered was a miracle.
So, for once, the cover story really was true, but as Paul Harvey would say, now you know the rest of the story...
15/22. I caught up to a car on a highway going well over the speed limit. The driver was also weaving through three lanes. After pulling him over, the vehicle came to a stop and began to shake back and forth.
(Continued on the next page...)
I approached the driver side cautiously and no one was sitting in the driver's seat. The driver, who was the only occupant of the vehicle, had moved across to the front passenger seat and argued that I didn't see him "driving" because he wasn't in the driver's seat. He went to jail that night for DWI.
16/22. My aunt works for the RCMP in Canada, she told me this story. Apparently many years ago some lady called 911 claiming some random person rang the doorbell, she opened the door. The person burst in and threw her relatively new born baby in their pool and ran away. She didn't know how to swim, so she couldn't dive in and get it.
But here's what actually happened...
What actually happened was, she made that all up and it was her who threw her own baby into the pool to drown and die! She did it because by the time the doctors had found out the baby would be a "special needs", it was too late for an abortion. She didn't want to be embarrassed by having a child like that....
The cops found this all out after tapping her phone for several years. She admitted it to some relative in her home country on a phone call 8 years after the incident.
17/22. My brother's roommate from college is a cop in Pittsburgh. They were just on patrol after a Wiz Khalifa concert and it was him and two other cops in their unmarked police car. He's in the passenger seat with another cop in the back just kind of monitoring the crowd to make sure no one gets out of hand. His partner driving the car gets out of it and it talking on the phone as someone jumps into the driver seat and tries to steal the cop car with two cops in it. He yells get out of the car, you're under arrest. She claimed she wasn't going to steal it but rather just drive the 2 or 3 blocks to her car because she didn't want to walk.
18/22. Ridealong here.
"Where ya headed?"
"To visit my son at college"
"Which college?"
(Continue reading on the next page...)
"Uhhhh...I don't know"
Cut to popping the trunk and 160 pounds of weed falling onto the side of the interstate. That was a fun day.
19/22. Pulled over a woman for going 59 in a 45. She claimed her speedometer light was out and it was about 9:30 so it was pretty dark. Told her okay just get me you insurance and registration. She then turned on her lights to find it and the speedometer came on.
She cried when we pointed it out.
20/22. Not a police officer, but my boyfriend was a Marine. In Afghanistan one time they were conducting a clearing operation in a village and found a Taliban fighter under a pile of rugs clutching a detonator. They then discovered several IEDs set up outside the building in the intersection that were rigged to go off with the detonator.
The guy had evidently gotten scared and failed to set off the bombs. When they asked him what he was doing there he stated that he was just an innocent civilian that had fallen asleep under a pile of rugs and woke up with a detonator in his hand. Turned out to be a really strange guy. He ended up trying to bite my boyfriend after he took away his stash of hash during questioning.
21/22. When I found a bunch of young adults pool hopping they told me it was because they needed to test each swimming pool to make sure their neighborhood water source wasn't contaminated.
22/22. Growing up, my best friend's dad was a police officer. The favorite excuse he shared for a motorist who blew through a red light:
"But officer, the light was green when I closed my eyes".
He also told a story of his favorite retort to the common "you're just trying to fill your quota" which was to reply "yep, two more and I get a toaster". He would always smirk afterwards and finish with "yeah, that earned me a civilian complaint".
BONUS!
1. My uncle is a cop in town, and he would always tell the story of the time he pulled over this Fabio looking guy riding his Ducati without a helmet. When prompted as to why he wasn't wearing a helmet he responded, "I just took a shower officer I'm just drying my hair."
2. Called to the library for a loud drunken guy, was going to give him a ride somewhere to sober up:
"Is there anything in your pockets I need to know about?"
"I dunno, these ain't my pants..."
"...not ...your ...Pants?"
"Nope, pulled them out the lost and found and put them on cause I needed some pants."
"What happened to your pants?"
"I dunno! I woke up, my boys were gone, and I don't have any pants!"
pat him down "Well, whoever left these pants is going to be pissed they left their spice in the pocket!"
"Naw man, that's weed! I don't smoke that fake crap!"
Some of our possessions are no-brainer, have to have them, best things in the universe. Others are total beaters, through and through liabilities, that should have been trashed years ago.
But what about those possessions that fall right in between?
These are the things we love as much as we hate. Like some people or places in our lives, these objects and us have a love/hate relationship--and, surprisingly, almost as much baggage as the human version includes.
Some Redditors sat down and shared their best examples of these kinds of possessions.
lliorca336 asked, "What do you have a love / hate relationship with?"
Some set their sights on the elephant in the room. They described their excitement as well as all the issues that come with the expansive, unbelievably powerful internet.
The Whole Dang ThingÂ
"The internet." -- LM1120
"Yup. On one side, it can really help people who feel alone. However, it can also breed toxicity." -- RHCube
"Back down it was as simple as don't use it but thats not really possible anymore" -- Derpsterio29
Even More WholeÂ
"Technology in general."
"On the one hand, it's nice that I was able to deposit a check just now while sitting down on my bedroom. On the other, screw anyone who has the audacity to call me and greet me with a robot."
Horrifyingly Convenient
"I have it with none other than 'Google.' "
"I hate it when Google tracks my every move. I even feel scared sometimes. Like just the other day, I was watching 'Padmavat' on Amazon Prime. It wasn't even my account, but my husband's. We had to stop in the middle due to something."
"And as soon as I opened my Gmail next, the very first email on the top was a 'Spam' email asking me if I missed out on watching 'Padmawat?' Really Scary!"
"And then, I love it when it takes me down the memory lane. Like just today, my Google Photos app asked me if I would like to see where I was on this day in 2010? I thought why not. Turns out, I was at my friend's wedding. Which reminded me, 'Oh! It's her anniversary today!' "
"I simply sent one of her gorgeous pics wishing her happy anniversary. We had a long chat, after which I sent over all of the pics from that day. She was really happy to re-visit them and tagged them as the best anniversary gift!"
-- toxasagt
Others chose to discuss those necessities of day-to-day life that they've actually come to love completing over and over.
But that doesn't mean they don't get annoying all the time too.
ProcrastinatingÂ
"Showers."
"That weird thing where I'll waste time before entering the shower because it feels like such a chore that takes a long time, I'm gonna need 5 h to dry my hair afterwards etc., but then when I'm in the shower i never wanna get out."
-- Victoria749
Cruising, Until Your NotÂ
"Driving is my biggest love/ hate relationship. I absolutely love the feel of driving when there's a small amount/ no traffic and the feel of being able to go wherever you want in your country is so freeing. Start/stop traffic, car maintenance costs, insurance, monthly payments, terrible roads, the possibility of an accident, driving through new places without clear signage etc..."
"Man, driving at its best is one of my favourite things in life but at its worst I wonder why I ever got my license and look toward busses with jealousy."
-- LTPfiredemon
It Will Never EndÂ
"Cooking. I hate the necessity of having to prepare food and the process itself, but I usually like the result, and if I cook for other people, I get many compliments for how it's good."
"You know, when I hate to do that, then at least it gotta be tasty."
-- Ziriath
Others spoke about the luxuries in life. It almost feels absurd to complain about such wonderful, unnecessary possessions.
And yet, they are luxuries with a slight catch.
The Nut BarrierÂ
"Chocolate."
"Probably my biggest trigger to ruin my diet. Doesn't even have to be good chocolate. Doesn't even have to be mediocre chocolate (by American standards). I'm talking about, like Palmer's Double Crisp super-cheap, probably-not-even-actually-chocolate Chocolate."
"My only saving grace is that I'm allergic to peanuts, and a lot of the really really cheap chocolate has peanuts/peanut butter in it, so it's no longer a temptation."
More and MoreÂ
"Having a home gym:"
"Love: Not having to go far and not having to deal with other ppl and their bs."
"Hate: Everything you want is much more expensive than you expect... and you keep wanting more"
Another Take on Tech
"Modern technology. For every way it makes our lives easier, there's at least five ways it makes things harder."
"But overall, it's generally worth it... if you can get the stuff to finally work, which might take you all day."
-- Arekai4098
So the next time you find yourself out of wits in frustration, only to come back to that same object or task the very next day, don't feel so alone.
Everyone out here is emotionally confused about their inanimate objects and abstract concepts.
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People Identify The Common Misconceptions That Only Exist Because Of Clever Marketing
We live in an era defined, amongst other things, by the unparalleled barrage of content that blasts our eyes and ears throughout every hour of every single day.
Truly, it's exhausting to be alive in the contemporary media landscape.
Generations before had to deal with posters, billboards, and magazine advertisements, then radio commercials after that, and then TV commercials came along.
We thought the consumer seduction reached its peak with those.
But then, lo and behold, social media came about. And now the "information" peddled by brands and advertisers is everywhere. And so so much of it is misleading, or flat out incorrect.
Some Redditors shared the examples that came to mind.
Cameron213 asked, "What is a common misconception that only exists because of clever marketing?"
Many people chose to talk about the marketing efforts used to push health and nutrition products onto consumers.
It's no surprise that there were so many examples to choose from. People in contemporary times are obsessed with health, fitness, diet, and longevity.
So of course, marketers have taken some liberties.
"Zero"
"That things with 'zero sugar' can still have 0.2 grams of sugar per unit which is why tic tacs claim to be zero sugar but can still be dangerous for a diabetic person" -- Whynotgarlicbagel
"Always check the ingredients"
"I found some 'no added sugar' ice cream that had concentrated caramelised sugar syrup as a flavoring"
"Also no added sugar just means they haven't added any sugar. Not that it's zero sugar" -- EmergencyAdvance
The Natural WorldÂ
" 'Natural' food isn't your definition of natural." -- Gmax100
"Cyanide is natural" -- Izwe
"Everything is natural, nuclear power plants are as natural as beaver dams" -- Skylake52
The Anti-Fat MovementÂ
"Low fat is good for you. Well not just clever marketing, also lots of lobbying from the sugar industry" -- UltimateAnswer42
"That's a big one. Fat being the 'bad' macronutrient was something that took me a while to unlearn. I felt my healthiest when I ate a high fat, lower carb (50g or so) diet." -- Cameron213
Give Tators a ChanceÂ
"White potatoes are somehow unhealthy even though they are a very nutritious starchy root VEGETABLE."
"Just because when you smother oil and ranch on it it becomes unhealthy does not mean potatoes themselves are unhealthy."
Leave It AloneÂ
"Vaginal odor being bad was a thing for a while, and that it could easily be corrected with over the counter treatments such as douching."
"First of all. A vagina is gonna smell like a vagina, not like flowers. If you're concerned about the way your vagina smells you should see a doctor."
"Second of all, the vagina is self-cleaning and doesn't need extra soaps to help keep it 'fresh.' In fact, those soaps and chemicals can cause harm and create real infections."
-- ZeD00m
Other people chose to point out the marketing efforts that have aimed to influence our expectations of culture and the social playing field.
What is "cool" and acceptable is what sells. The question is, who decides what is "cool?"
NOT RequiredÂ
"Makeup as a necessary norm." -- b2lose
"Man, FU** makeup! I don't wear it and have yet to have anyone I work with question my professionalism for it. I hate it, it's expensive, and I won't wear it." -- TheRedMaiden
"I love this, and I'll also throw in: shaving as a necessity. I've had so many people tell me it's 'unhygienic' for women to have leg hair." -- buriedclementines
Manufactured StatusÂ
"That teenagers are cool, tbh. Teen culture is 95% manufactured by suits trying to make a buck." -- crookedhope
"When have teenagers ever been cool to anyone but themselves?" -- troomer50
"right? this kills me as an adult. all the cool teenager sh** that 'parents don't understand' was absolutely designed by grown a** dorks just like their parents." -- likearealreptile
Passing the BuckÂ
"The notion that climate change needs to be combated by individuals making changes in their day to day lives by buying green products. Corporations, global shipping, and factory farms all contribute massive amounts of pollution and greenhouse gasses that can't be offset by using less straws or buying a hybrid car."
"An entire city's worth of individuals couldn't even come close to offsetting the pollution created by a handful of ships used for global shipping, yet advertising would have you think that individuals could replace real systemic change and regulation."
And then there was one total, bald-faced lie. It had to do with an upsettingly common purchase that comes with an arbitrarily high price tag.
Maybe it's time to rethink it.
Pulling the Strings of Supply and Demand
"That diamonds are rare." -- icecreamterror
"That you should spend so much on a diamond and wedding, but can barely scrape by. Sure, let's throw a $30k banquet then go jumpstart the car again to get home." -- Choontz
"Futhermore on this; that 'cognac' diamonds are a desirable colour in a diamond, and are worth more than colourless. Jewellers originally struggled to sell stones of this colour so came up with a marketing concept to make them seem more unique, more special, and just as desirable as, or moreso than, colourless diamonds (which are generally far rarer, particularly if they are classified as flawless with few/imperceptible inclusions)."
"Similar idea with "champagne" diamonds...they were given this name to make them sound more appealing, too, so jewellers could still use them and increase the volume of jewellery they produce and sell." -- teenytinytinkerer
Of course, this list is so far from exhaustive. Pay attention for just the next few hours and I'm sure you'll come up with your own list of at least ten in no time.
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In the age of the internet, sometimes it can be very cool to hate on things just because other people do. Bandwagons can be fun, right? But honestly, not all of the things hated on actually deserve it. Save your hate for things that actually call for it.
Wanna jump off the bandwagon? Then keep reading!
U/lit3rallyuseless asked: What doesn't deserve the hate it gets?
​Film and media are probably the biggest contender for being hated on randomly. It may seem harmless, but not always deserved.
Actors are people too!
Actors who played characters that people didn't like.
Really if you hated the character then the actor did a good job (assuming that was the role).
The best cartoons.
Child cartoons. Some are actually really good, even as an adult.
I feel like watching cartoons aimed at generally a younger audience allows for you to be reminded of some life lessons, I know I forget some things, or didn't realise others, or it at least partially renews my awareness of something I should still like or appreciate
This doesn't deserve awards, it's just my opinion that is apparently shared by many.
This man did nothing wrong.
Guy Fieri, he literally is the nicest person in the world but since he looks like he was electrocuted by mountain dew people want to saw his head off.
Even before that, I was witness to his other charitable work. A few years back, Santa Rosa was hit by some terrible fires and he showed up at a few shelters and personally cooked up and served some killer buffet food. No cameras, no massive team of PR, just a dude with an assistant to keep him on schedule to hit up other shelters in the area. Guy Fieri legit earned a lot of respect in my book for that.
You know who DEFINITELY doesn’t deserve hate? Animals. They’re just living their best lives, and need to be left alone.​
The best cats.
Black cats.
We got a black cat for the first time last year. I've since formulated the theory that black cats might get some of their reputation from the fact that people can't see them well in the dark and so they seemingly appear out of nowhere and they might be instinctually cautious because they know people have a tendency to kick them while walking in the dark. Our black cat is the sweetest cat I've ever known.
They get a bad rep.
Sharks. They are beautiful, complex creatures, deserving of respect and, like any wild animal should be left alone in their natural habitat, but they get this reputation as vicious bloodthirsty monsters. This is only because every shark attack is news, and only then because they are so rare. More people are killed EVERY DAY by mosquitoes than sharks kill in a year.
Any apex predator that has remained evolutionarily unchanged for hundreds of millions of years, whose existance predates TREES, is deserving or our respect and admiration. Shine on, you crazy cartlaginous fish, shine on.
So cute too!
Opossums. They're neat little critters. They eat tons of ticks that carry Lyme disease, (mostly) don't carry rabies because their body temp is too low, and they're the only marsupial native to North America! They get a bad rap because their first defense is to hiss and bare teeth, but failing that, they just play dead.
If you don't have the predisposition to hate them, you'll find they're pretty cute too.
E: this is about /opossums/, the north American species.
Kiwis, I feel for you, but this comment isn't about your possums.
​Hating on other people for just living their lives also seems to be a big contender for things that don’t deserve to be hated on.
This is so true.
Unemployed people. A lot of people genuinely are looking for work and did not want to lose their last job/it was beyond their control (like a layoff) but they get so much hate and called lazy by most people. I know too many unemployed people that are actually really trying hard. They definitely aren't lazy. (Not saying lazy unemployed people don't exist, but to be fair, so do lazy employed people too lol)
Leave the weather man alone!
Meteorologists. They try their best to predict the weather based on patterns, models, and data. They're not perfect because predicting the weather is insanely difficult. When they get it wrong, I think we should go easy on them. It was probably an outlier result almost no one could have foreseen.
I've seen people get angry over the meteorologists for getting it right. Like they control the weather - it is their fault we are having rain, that kind of BS. Never made sense to me, but hey, I have plenty of relatives I clashed with growing up.
Please stop being d*cks to these people.
Customer service associates.
I hate when customers think that I, the minimum wage person forced to sit there and listen to them yell, am personally responsible for every policy they disagree with. Like, ma'am, if I had that much power and influence, I wouldn't be sitting here on a Saturday evening serving you.
Wholesome and necessary.
People don't deserve hate they give themselves when they are not doing too good at the moment.
I'm in a weird place and I didn't know I needed to read this. Thanks buddy.
If you haven't heard it from anyone else today, I'm proud of you.
It seems like people hate on things simply because they think they're meant to hate them. But you can always be the change and make an effort to stop being an a**hole about certain things.
No matter what though, sometimes haters gonna hate
Money means different things to different people.
Reddit user, u/TopTierUsername101, wanted to hear what you would do when they asked:
How much would $100,000 change your life?
Just Get The Basics Out Of The Way
There's the standard responses, where people ran down the list of the essentials they could get out of the way.
Making The Unmanageable Manageable
A ton.
Could pay off all debt and put a very nice down payment on a house.
Would make the mortgage manageable.
Give All The Money To The Kids
insanely.. i'm 19 and i'd be able to pay for university, pay for my car and help my parents who are on the streets rn get back on their feet and get my siblings out of foster care
You're the person I'd want to get the 100K. I don't need it; tons of people on this thread don't need it, but you my friend sound like you could use it for good.
Allowing You To Focus On Other Things
5-6 years of rent while i get my Ph.D sounds pretty fantastic
I hear this. I'm about to move with my partner so they can continue their education and would love to have $100k to live off of while I find work.
Wouldn't Go As Far As You Think
Then there's those other people who wouldn't be greatly affected by $100k, instead saying it would continue to help them comfortably move forward. Who doesn't like to be comfortable?
Almost Livable!
It would be almost enough for a downpayment on a house for us in our area. Housing is crazy expensive.
It would be less than half of a downpayment on an avg house in my area. This is basically keeping my generation from owning property and it's terrifying.
(avg. House here is about 1.2million)
A Slow Burn
Immediately? Not much at all. I'd pay off all my debt, take a chunk out of the house Im about to sign on. The monthly savings however would really allow me to change my life though.
Same here. A lot would change on paper, but the real effects wouldn't be apparent for several years.
This, also the peace of mind that would come along with it would be the most significant Change
Preparing For The Future
Just more money for retirement. That's all, business as usual.
Same. I mean, I'd say I'd spend some and go on vacation, but my vacations are typically camping somewhere cool and then hiking, so it's pretty frugal as far as vacations go. I'd like think that I could retire a little earlier if I had an extra 100 grand thrown at me, though.
Making A Huge Impact
Finally, there's those people who would do quite a bit if you were gifted $100k. This runs the length of saving lives to crafting a livable future.
Eliminating That Feeling
I'd be able to afford my own apartment instead of living with 3 ppl. I'd be able to focus more on building my life instead of just trying to survive every day. I'd be able to donate to charities and less fortunate ppl in my area.
Overall it would make my life less stressful and make me feel like less of a failure.
America Isn't Very Good Sometimes
Dude, that's almost 7 years worth of insulin. Can you imagine not having to wonder how you were going to manage your life threatening disease for 7, well technically 6.9, years? God, I could actually put money toward my future rather than trying desperately to stay alive in the present.
If the current rate of inflation continues, and if I am lucky enough to live until 75, I will have spent over 7 million dollars on insulin alone, not including other absurdly expensive diabetic supplies, like test strips, that are absolutely necessary for my survival.
Just for some context, each test strip, without insurance, runs you around 1.50 ($75 for a 50 pack of strips) and as someone who leads an active lifestyle and is insulin sensitive, I need to check my blood sugar roughly 6-8 times a day, more if I'm sick or an unforeseen event occurs that affects my blood glucose levels.
It's f-cking criminal what my country is allowing to happen to type one diabetics like myself.
Money Can't Buy Happiness, Until It Does
It would: pay off my husband's student loans and some medical bills that he has left, pay off my dental bill, pay off our credit cards, and then maybe we could get some upkeep/fixit stuff done around the house. The rest would go into savings. We'd have a good amount of money freed up each month, and that would also go into savings.
So, really, $100k would change my life by finally giving me a decent savings account that could be used in the future to hopefully avoid debt. It would be a very nice thing to have.
Dan Price, the CEO of Gravity Payments who became famous when he cut his 1.1 million dollar salary to ensure every one of his employees received a $70k a year salary, probably said it best when he noted, "Money buys happiness when you climb out of poverty. But going from well-off to very well-off won't make you happier. Doing what you believe is right will."
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