Police Officers Describe What Happened When Calls They Responded To Turned Paranormal
Being a police officer can be a pretty scary job at times. Officers just never know what you're going to run into, so they're always on high alert.
But do they ever expect to run into the paranormal?
No, not really. Until it happens, of course, as we learned after Redditor Boert9 asked the online community: "Law Enforcement of Reddit, what was the most scary/paranormal call you have responded to?"
Warning: Some sensitive reading material ahead.
"Once we arrived..."
I am a police officer working on an emergency response team on a busy London borough. We took a call to a suspected domestic incident in a block of flats. The informant said that she could hear screaming and sounds of disturbance coming from the flat above her own.
Once we arrived my colleague and I knocked on the door of the flat the informant said the noise was coming from. I had heard nothing on my way up and certainly couldn't hear any disturbance coming from the address. To be honest I heard nothing at all. After knocking twice we had no response. My colleague left me to go downstairs and speak directly to the informant.
I stayed by the door. I knocked again and after some time it was answered by an elderly woman. She had clearly been asleep and was alarmed to see me standing outside. I told her that someone had called saying that they could hear a disturbance coming from within her address. I asked her if there was anyone else inside with her. She looked bemused and told me that she lived alone and had been sleeping. I asked her if I could come in to satisfy myself that no one else was there.
She invited me in and I walked into what was a small 2 bedroom flat. The flat was in darkness apart from her hall light and her bedside lamp. I began searching through the flat. As I approached the final door (the living room) my colleague called me up on the radio. He told me that he was on his way and asked if I was okay. I told him everything was fine wondering why he sounded so flustered. He told me that he was with the informant and could also hear screaming and loud thuds coming from the flat I was in.
I told him that he must be mistaken as I was almost done searching the flat and that I had heard nothing whatsoever. I have to admit a feeling of unease as I opened the final door. Like all the other rooms it was in darkness but was freezing cold. My breath misted immediately. There was no one in the room and no signs of disturbance. No window was open. I called my colleague and asked him to listen out for my footfall. He said he could hear my feet as I stamped them but said that the screaming had stopped. This coincided with me opening the door. I left shortly after apologising to the elderly woman for waking her.
I have no rational explanation for this at all. My colleague and I left feeling very creeped out.
Late evening maybe a decade ago, I ended up running silent to a call with additional units in tow. The caller reported hearing "footsteps" on her second floor when she was in the kitchen. She lived alone, middle aged, divorced, no kids, and had no expected company. She is outside across the street when we arrive, obviously unnerved and being calmed by her neighbor.
Other units showed up almost as I did and set up a perimeter at the corners of the property. We talk with her, get permission to enter, so we decide we'll announce ourselves and clear the house. Three of us stack up on the front door, announce and make entry while the other officers are viewing the windows from a distance under concealment. She was in the midst of making a really late dinner so the house smells really good. I remember how good it smelled. Anyway, we clear the ground level and make our way to the stairs when we hear it.
Obviously footsteps on the wood floors above us. Not a panicky "oh shit I'm caught footsteps" and running to hide or escape, no, these were calm, methodic and almost pace like. We announce ourselves again and no response, except the pacing just starts to sorta fade away. Quietly I make my way up the steps, adrenaline pumping, and concentrating on pieing the corner at the top. I stop a few stairs shy of the corner, breathe, and proceed up.
"The hallway..."
The hallway at the top was pitch black and after successfully clearing the top/ corner we make our way down the hallway clearing rooms. Nothing. Nobody. Not even a critter. Not that any critter would ever make what I describe as human footsteps on hardwood. After the initial search, a few of the other officers involved also checked every nook and cranny, bed, closet, rack, hell, even the washer, dryer, appliances and cupboards were thoroughly searched. Nothing was out of order. Nobody was hiding anywhere.
Eventually we invite the lady back into her residence and reassure her that there was nobody in there and we equated her noise to maybe wood shrinkage or expansion in the home.
None of the officers outside and after our initial search had seen anybody leave the top or bottom floors or windows. The house had no indications that anybody tried to force open a window or door.
I stayed behind for about 30 minutes once the other officers cleared the call and waited while her friend showed up to stay the night with her. I went over basic security measures with her and double checked all her windows and doors were not compromised. She fed me well done lasagna as I waited, and to this day, I'm convinced that I interacted with another dimension of life that day.
"Anyways, I approached Lucy..."
About 4 years ago, a lady who I'll call Lucy, called our non-emergency line and said she locked herself out of her house. I responded to take the report in case FD needed to force entry.
I arrived first and immediately noticed a burning candle and some "jesusy" statues in the upstairs window. The light in this room was also on. I can't explain it, but it seemed a bit odd to me.
Anyways, I approached Lucy who appeared to be about 65 years old, and asked what happened. She said she walked to her car to get groceries for her and her mother but forgot her keys inside and the door had locked behind her. I asked if her mother was home and Lucy replied in the affirmative. Lucy went on to say she technically lived alone because her mom died 6 years prior but she still "lives" with her in the bedroom with the lit candle and makes her presence known by turning on/off lights, opening/closing doors, and turning on the bathroom faucet.
I then walked the perimeter of the home and found an unlocked window into the kitchen. Since Lucy never actually left home and knew no one else was inside, I radioed dispatch and climbed in through the window with her consent.
As my boot touched the kitchen floor, I heard an audible click. At the same time, the lights in the stairway and upstairs hallway to my left turned off. I quickly walked to the rear sliding door to my right and advised Lucy what had happened. Lucy laughed and said that was just her mom saying hello. I told Lucy that although I genuinely believe what she told me was true, I still had to do my due diligence and ensure no one else was inside. I radioed for a back and within minutes my buddy arrived. The first thing he asked about was the lit candle in the window.
While clearing the upstairs, we came upon the room where the candle was and immediately noticed it was blown out. There were no open windows, fans, vents, or other obvious source that could've extinguished the flame. We just looked at each other with a bit of unease and went back downstairs to leave. click the upstairs lights turned off behind us. We talked to Lucy for another 5 minutes and suggested getting a battery operated candle just to be safe....
Well Lucy clearly thought "f--- the police" because to this day, that candle burns in the open window most nights when I drive by. And every now and then I'll stop and talk to Lucy to see how she and her mother are doing.
"Early in my career..."
Early in my career, the elevators in the older section of CIA Headquarters (known as the Original Headquarters Building or OHB) were known to have quirks (I think they still do). Occasionally, the elevator would stop and the doors would open at a floor with no one there, and no one on the elevator had requested that floor.
I heard second-hand that the "thing to do" when that happened was to say "Good day, Mr. Director," because it was assumed that the doors opened for the ghost of Allen Dulles. OHB was his project, as many know, but he never was able to move into his office, having been replaced as CIA Director just before it was ready.
"I've been in law enforcement..."
I've been in law enforcement for several years now. I serve a small, rural town. During the summer of 2015, I had one of my most unsettling experiences.
That evening my partner and I were called to investigate a potential trespasser on some residential property out in the sticks. A young girl, about fifteen or sixteen years old, had called 911 and reported that a person wearing a clown costume was loitering around her backyard. I'll refer to her as Sara. She was extremely frightened when we arrived. Her mother had to work late that night, so Sara was home alone.
She explained that a tall person in a clown costume had repeatedly emerged from the woods in her backyard. She first saw him when she went to let her dog out. He was peering at her from behind a tree, beckoning her to come over. "I could hear him laughing," she said. She ran inside with her pet, locked the door, and immediately called 911. She watched from a window as the clown reappeared several times from the woods, exhibiting erratic behavior.
She described the clown's appearance as "really scary," not at all like the silly, colorful characters typically seen. He had a quintessential red nose, but wore a dark-colored jumpsuit. She thought his face was painted white with dark shapes around his eyes. No hair or head accessories, according to her.
After investigating inside the home, we checked the perimeter of the house. My partner stayed behind to monitor the doors while I approached the tree line. No sooner than I shined my flash light into the woods that I heard the sounds of snapping tree limbs, as if someone was walking through the forest about twenty yards away. I called out, announcing myself as a police officer—no response, no more sounds.
Not sure what we were dealing with, we did not venture into the woods. It was the middle of the night with limited visibility. I focused my attention on investigating the property for anything suspicious while my partner patrolled around the house. Nothing of interest was found.
Over the next couple of months, our department received several more calls about clown sightings. Not only did these sightings occur within a five mile radius of each other, but all of them were reported by young people. Because it's a small community, we initially thought this was all some kind of prank/hoax orchestrated by a bunch of bored kids. These kids, however, seemed genuinely frightened upon investigation and their descriptions were consistent. We really didn't know what to think.
No one or nothing was ever found in these cases, with the exception of one. Around sunset one evening, we received a phone call from an elderly woman I'll call Helen. She was a sweet lady who played the organ at a church in town. Although she was devoutly religious, like the kind of person who'd quote scripture in the middle of a conversation, she meant well.
Anyways, Helen called and said that her grandson (whom she was raising) saw a clown in their yard. She was concerned and wanted the police to investigate. Her grandson was only five and getting details out of him proved difficult. In a rather matter-of-fact kind of way, Helen said, "Officer, those clowns are devil worshippers. I know it because right after my grandson saw that clown, my mother's nutcracker—that one right there on top of the fireplace—fell and broke. I've been praying hard ever since." Sure enough, her nutcracker was broken into two pieces. I did an internal eye roll and redirected the conversation.
"Let me walk outside and check things out," I said. Helen followed behind me as we walked out the backdoor. Everything was still and quiet. I asked if there were any places on the property where someone could hide. She said there was an old, overgrown shed about a hundred yards behind her house. I radioed in for support, and another officer arrived soon after.
Thankfully it was a lightly wooded area so the shed was easy enough to find. It was quite dilapidated and half falling down. The door was slightly ajar. We called out but there wasn't a response. We had flash lights in our left hands and our right hands on our weapons. The door creaked open and slowly we walked in. There was no one inside.
Besides old, rusty farm equipment, we noticed a couple of strange items scattered around the floor. The first thing we saw was a brass cow figurine. Second, we found a bible with burn marks all over it. We later learned the entire book of Leviticus had been torn out.
Helen adamantly swore she had no idea who the items belonged to or why they were in that shed. The whole thing was very overwhelming for her. We brought the items to the station but nothing ever surfaced. That was the last clown sighting. Maybe it was a series of pranks, an odd fad that came and went. Whatever the case, it all sticks out to me as something incredibly strange. I always feel uneasy whenever I think about those events.
"A few weeks ago..."
A few weeks ago I'd gotten dispatched to a 911 call that involved a female frantically screaming at the dispatcher "she's going to kill me, she's going to kill me! Come quick I'm at [address of where she was at]!"
Naturally, every unit within range of my sector and myself had radioed in a response and we were all hauling ass to get there. Once we got there we discovered the house was abandoned for some years now and so we set a cordon around with officers watching all exits, as my shift partner, myself and a female officer announced ourselves and made entry into the residence.
We cleared all of the first floor and proceeded to the second and as soon as we got to the top of the stairs a slight movement spooked us and me and my partner immediately raised our weapons into a room where there was only a noose. Both he and I thought we saw a body on it at first glance, there was nothing there. We cleared the rest of the second floor and took a closer look at the noose, some dried up blood and what i think was peeled off skin on it from an earlier suicide that occurred over a dozen years ago, we thought it might've been recent, but we didn't know at the time.
Anyways, immediately after we cleared the house we determined that it was way too dead, for lack of a better word, to have been used recently however we called in some detectives. But before we all stepped out, we all agreed we didn't see what just happened. Reason why is my Service has a policy on what could be constituted as "paranormal instances", where the second something like that happens you are immediately suspended from duty, and give in your badge, your gun, your duty belt and your vest. Before being taken on the spot to a psychiatrist/psychologist, for a full comprehensive evaluation. Needless to say I immediately called my supervisor at the end of shift and told him about it and did the right thing by going in for evaluation. Something to be said about integrity.
I've driven past that house multiple times in the past weeks and I've always sunk deeper into my seat as I've driven past. Something about it, it's like you could actually feel there was something off about it. City seems to agree with me, as of 3 days ago the house is the #1 demolition priority in my sector and will be down by the end of the month. I'm just not happy that I'm going to have to go back inside next week to collect anything that might be of interest to both the city and my superiors. Luckily I won't be going in alone.
Also, the female who called in the 911 call was charged for Public Mischief under the pretext of misuse of 911 and misleading Peace Officers.
"It's probably drug related..."
Not really scary, but possibly paranormal, and a case I was never able to solve.
Three years ago, I was called in to an investigation of a burglary in a cemetery. When the forensics guys and I finally went out there (it was a slow morning), none of the responding deputies had actually gone inside yet. Four deputies and a sergeant were busy "securing the scene" from the outside, because it was still dark out and they didn't want to go into the dark mausoleum that had been broken into. Apparently they felt much safer with us overweight non-sworn employees around, so we went inside together.
The exterior door to the mausoleum had been forced open, and we started looking around for signs of anything stolen or vandalized. Eventually we did find that one of the grave sites in the mausoleum, almost 15 feet off the ground, had the cement plaque shattered and the coffin was pulled out and left sprawling on the floor. All contents of the coffin were missing, which including the cremated remains of three people, the last one who died in 2004. A person would have had to bring their own ladder to pull this out, or been at least 12-13 feet tall.
According to the forensics guy, it looked like the plaque for the coffin had been shattered from the inside, due to water damage. Still, it seems oddly coincidental that a plaque would simultaneously break on the night of a break-in to the mausoleum. It hadn't been accessed since 2004, so almost twelve years prior. The people in the grave site had a single living relative. I called them, exchanged pleasantries, and then when I asked about the mausoleum they said "No habla English" and hung up.
It's probably drug related, somehow, but this is the exactly the kind of thing that would happen at the start of a vampire or zombie apocalypse movie.
"When you step inside..."
There is this abandoned day care that we have to patrol...VERY spooky. Temperature is different in each room. Sounds can be heard. Toys found in the roof panels...sometimes those toys are seen moved from the roof to the floor in the rooms. Some rooms have more pressure than others like being at the bottom of a swimming pool. When you step inside all you want to do is leave..some said a child died at that daycare...
"I have no rational explanation..."
I am a police officer working on an emergency response team on a busy London borough. We took a call to a suspected domestic incident in a block of flats. The informant said that she could hear screaming and sounds of disturbance coming from the flat above her own.
Once we arrived my colleague and I knocked on the door of the flat the informant said the noise was coming from. I had heard nothing on my way up and certainly couldn't hear any disturbance coming from the address. To be honest I heard nothing at all. After knocking twice we had no response. My colleague left me to go downstairs and speak directly to the informant.
I stayed by the door. I knocked again and after some time it was answered by an elderly woman. She had clearly been asleep and was alarmed to see me standing outside. I told her that someone had called saying that they could hear a disturbance coming from within her address. I asked her if there was anyone else inside with her. She looked bemused and told me that she lived alone and had been sleeping. I asked her if I could come in to satisfy myself that no one else was there.
She invited me in and I walked into what was a small 2 bedroom flat. The flat was in darkness apart from her hall light and her bedside lamp. I began searching through the flat. As I approached the final door (the living room) my colleague called me up on the radio. He told me that he was on his way and asked if I was okay. I told him everything was fine wondering why he sounded so flustered. He told me that he was with the informant and could also hear screaming and loud thuds coming from the flat I was in.
I told him that he must be mistaken as I was almost done searching the flat and that I had heard nothing whatsoever. I have to admit a feeling of unease as I opened the final door. Like all the other rooms it was in darkness but was freezing cold. My breath misted immediately. There was no one in the room and no signs of disturbance. No window was open. I called my colleague and asked him to listen out for my footfall. He said he could hear my feet as I stamped them but said that the screaming had stopped. This coincided with me opening the door. I left shortly after apologising to the elderly woman for waking her.
I have no rational explanation for this at all. My colleague and I left feeling very creeped out.
There's something seeing a person litter that drives me up the wall. I remember being a kid and being explicitly told to hold on to my trash and not just throw it in the street. As a kid, I distinctly remember being made fun of for not just throwing the bag of chips I'd just eaten or an empty soda bottle into the gutter.
I can't imagine doing that. Why?! We truly treat this planet as if we have somewhere else to go.
After Redditor pnrddt asked the online community, "What small action immediately makes you dislike a stranger?" people shared their observations.
"Playing music..."
<p>Playing music or having a 'private' conversation via speaker phone in a public place.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginci58?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">LLCoolBrap</a></p>"When they exhibit..."
<p><strong></strong>When they exhibit a personality trait that I also have, and don't like about myself. Every time I find myself being dismissive or judgemental of somebody, it's just my own insecurity.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginn0g5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginn0g5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">iotangle42</a></p>"When I'm talking..."
<p>When I'm talking and they are not listening. Like they are not even trying to pretend that they are listening.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gincjto?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">eat-the-rich-07</a></p>"Because one of these days..."
<p>A person can treat me like a princess but as soon as I see them mistreating either animals or people, I am out of there. Because one of these days, you'll be on that receiving end.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginpr97?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">starlightradio</a></p>"It just screams..."
<p>Telling people to smile. It just screams condescending and a lack of emotional intelligence.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginovsj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginovsj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">3FoolsinaTrenchcoat</a></p>"When I hear that..."
<p>Grown ups using "baby talk" to try to get what they want. I'm not talking about when people goo-goo at babies, but when they use a silly whiney voice to try to persuade people or make people do them a favour.</p><p>"Aww, pwease hewp me wiv dis wittle pwoject."</p><p>When I hear that I instantly lose respect for that person, be it a stranger or someone I know.</p><p>Pet peeve.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginbwb4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">handsahwill</a></p>"Okay, we get it..."
<p>One-upping people. "Yeah, that's pretty good, but one time I..." Okay, we get it, your life is more amazing than everyone else's.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginhrkd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">well-uh-yeah</a></p>"When out driving..."
<p><strong></strong><strong></strong>When out driving, someone who pulls out in front of you, then proceeds to go 5-10+ mph under the speed limit.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gingjuj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gingjuj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">FuzzMcBeefy84</a></p>"If you don't..."
<p>Talking negatively about anyone who's just trying to have a good time in a fun setting. If you don't have nice to say shut the hell up.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gio4vf5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">intergLACTIC</a></p>"When people..."
<p>When people put other people down to try and make themselves look better. "Oh I'm just playing around with them we're friends." I don't care quit being an @ss you know what you're doing and you should be able to tell you're making them feel bad.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gio9p3c?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">inf303</a></p>"If it's into a drain..."
<p>Spitting on the pavement.</p><p>If it's into a drain, that's fair enough, sometimes you get phlegm and you need to get rid of it. Going for a drain shows you're at least considerate of other, imo. But on the floor where anyone can step in it (or if you're in a wheelchair, get it all over your hands from pushing the wheels) is just gross.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginojq3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ghostmadlittlemiss</a></p>When you're in the market for a slew of very specific facts that all fall under the same general theme, the internet really delivers.
Forget streamlined public health capabilities and revolutionized human communication, the true beauty of the internet is all the random, barely useful information you can find when a bunch odd people decide to assemble and swap info.
Homemade TarantulaÂ
<p>"Dental student here. Black hairy tongue is a common condition and it's exactly what it sounds like." </p><p>"It's just caused by buildup of dead skin that becomes hair like because of tobacco use or antibiotic use. Usually combined with lack of frictional forces from brushing"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu9tdq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Alarm-Potential</a></p>Load Em UpÂ
<p>"When a patient gets a kidney transplant, they usually leave the old 2 behind unless there's a significant problem with them."</p><p>"The extra kidney is just tucked in the peritoneum leaving the patient with 3 kidneys."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu6qjd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">MedicalJargon-itis</a></p>Come On Mutations!
<p>"Every single melanocyte on your skin (you know, the ones that give your hairs color, and your skin its skin color) is connected to your sympathetic nervous system via modified synapses."</p><p>"No-one knows why they're connected that way - but we do know that under stress, those nerves nuke the pool of stem cells that create hair pigment, which is why it makes you go grey."</p><p>"A few mutations and you could theoretically be able to control them and change color like a chameleon."</p><p>"So in many ways, we're basically walking cuttlefish."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuyo29?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">PavlovaPalava</a></p>Play the Long Game, PeopleÂ
<p>"Humans can outpace any animal on the planet."</p><p>"No, we're not the fastest, but if we were chasing the fastest animal (cheetah) we would catch it and be able to keep going."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gisujdr?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Bout3Fidy</a></p>Little Helpful CrittersÂ
<p>"There are little microscopic organisms living in your eyebrows, eating away at the dead skin."</p><p>"Don't freak out, they are very helpful and completely harmless, just a little gross"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giud33u?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Vid-Me-BossCheesburg</a></p>Thankfully That Filter is a Pretty Good OneÂ
<p>"Saliva is filtered blood. Your tears are too. And if you're too stressed out you can cry blood."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gitshe5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">mylifeisathrowaway10</a></p>Imagine It All in a BottleÂ
<p>"I know that the average human churns out between 1 and 2 liters of saliva every day.... oh and we have parasites who are embedded in our hair follicles, and they eat away at our skin, thus causing Dandruff :,)"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gisrxcc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Throwawayyy123451</a></p>So HotÂ
<p>"Humans give off so much body heat that in 30 min we can boil a gallon of water" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu1ngt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Financial-Ad-6050</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu1ngt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Rookie numbers" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuvqqt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">nopenothappening</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Pshh I can get a gallon of water boiling in like 10 minutes tops" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuhji3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ridiculouslygay</a></p>Oh DearÂ
<p>"Old ladies often have prolapse of their pelvic organs. This means their vaginal walls got so weak that it can no longer support their bladder or uterus."</p><p> -Nurse practitioner"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gitopxb?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">vespertinas</a></p>Working in a doctor's office means helping people when they're at their lowest. Sometimes, that leads to wonderful moments when the patient is thankful for all the advice and care you provided. Other times, it means taking something out of someone's bum.
Turns out, that second one happens a lot more than you might think.
For Fashion And Protection
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDMwOC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY1MjkwNTU2OX0.6D-LIQ26JXH0-7OtPpG93HOtt41wAv62bGHMVvuAYpk/img.gif?width=980" id="7ff06" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="6109fb5baf04f17deade8b58695881d1" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />wound up season 3 GIFGiphy<p>I had a patient come in with lacerations to her fingers. Her blender got clogged and she stuck her hand inside to clear it. She cleared it and the blender resumed....um blending. Luckily, she had long acrylic nails. This helped lessen the impact.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitz5l4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">Bornagainchola</a></p>I'd Rather Go To Sleep
<p>Guy came in after being concerned the bed sheet had stuck to his lower leg. Turns out hed been using a petrol mower the evening before and it had exploded. Full thickness burn to his calf. No pain. He wanted to go home to feed his cows instead of being transferred to burns and plastics. Man it looked like white leather.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitkqf9?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">DamaskRoses</a></p>Why Play Typical Catch?
<p>Guy was camping with his frat buddies and they were firing air rifles at each other with a baseball glove on.</p><p>The pellet was lodged well into his hand. Like, how did you think this was going to end?</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitq7lt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">Milesofstyle</a></p>Close Eyes Off From The World
<p>I was in the ER as a patient next to a guy who was brought in via ambulance because he super glued his eye lids shut.</p><p>He was high as a kite, but so was I from the pain meds I'd been given for my own injury. Whatever meds I was given made me think everything was hilarious. I got yelled at by the nurses for laughing hysterically in the next room. He was being a pain in the a--, ER was on diversion already, and they were not amused.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/githxnc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">brubarbal</a></p>That's Why It's Called A "Dog" Toy
<p>A few stand out. Person somehow swallowed a spiked dog toy.</p><p>Someone tried to reverse his circumcision by cutting more of his d-ck off with a pair of scissors.</p><p>About every object known to man up the bum. 🎵 if you like it then you shoulda put a string on it." 🎵</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitnt24?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">bsn2fnp1</a></p>Yeah, But, How?
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDMxMi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0MjAyNTM0OX0.Esaobyl7Yq7QltSxli0ZwjggE7j8A4gu0uNRnn1ZwUc/img.gif?width=980" id="95a28" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="f4eb7f0131c0d79db2de93fd2bbdc0af" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />homer simpson GIFGiphy<p>I've seen an internal vaginal laceration from someone climbing a fence while trying to see something happening down the street.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/giss2id?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">midturbinate</a></p>Again With The Butt...
<p>ER Nurse here</p><p>-We had a girl come in and who knows what she was doing but she had one of the thin glow sticks in her bladder, maybe some fun finger/glow play during a concert? I don't know but pretty wild.</p><ul><li>Also I had a Spanish speaking only gentleman explain why a shoe polish bottle was in his bum, we had to use a video interpreter due to the language barrier but it's was pretty wild to hear the interpreter say "I have a bottle of polish in my anus" after expecting him to just explain why he had belly pain. We also proceeded to print out multiple pictures of common types of shoe polish he used to ask him if it was "this one or that one". It was hilarious when he identified what one it was based on the picture, he had to go to the OR</li></ul><div><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitqmlm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">AirFryersRule</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitqmlm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"></a></div>Sounds Like A College Guy Thing To Do
<p>Had a university student who ignited a firework in his anus while drunk for the amusement of his buddies. It exploded, causing full thickness burns of his rectum, resulting in him needing a colostomy</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/giss6l1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">ArcofRiolan</a></p>Wow...
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDI4OC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzMDMyMzMyMn0.b42VhIpJrAsaFR19Cf55ZVkWnby5yTIrMhI73HVAImk/img.gif?width=980" id="3ccdf" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="50847094a4e17c16febbb35d2146f14f" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />scared homer simpson GIFGiphy<p>Operating theatre - this woman came in with a frozen chicken stuck inside her lady parts. Apparently she had a habit of buying them, inserting them and then pulling them out, as she really had a thing for going through childbirth, but on this occasion, she hadn't allowed time for it to defrost properly /adequately.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Mike_OxonFaier/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Mike_OxonFaier</a></p><p><em>Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter <a href="https://mailchi.mp/knowable/knowable-newsletter-in-content" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">here</a>. </em></p>I love movies. The cinema has long been a savior of mine and has given me some of my greatest inspirations. But being an avid film watcher has also made me quite the critic. I can always tell when a movie is worth the money to see in theaters or wait until it's on basic cable with commercials. The signs of mediocrity abound, and sometimes they aren't that difficult to spot.
Redditor u/fjv08kl wanted to know what is obvious about mediocre cinema by asking.... What are some subtle 'red flags' that tell you a movie is not worth watching?