Visiting Santa is a rite of passage for millions of children every year. That's a whole lot of Santas and a whole lot of requests for the big guy.
Reddit user _sleepykitten_ asked:
Former "Santas" of Reddit, what was the strangest or sweetest thing a child asked Santa for Christmas?
4,500 former Santas (and children) shared their stories. Here are the best of them.
When I was little I asked for a wishing bone. There is an old wives tale that if you crack it you get a wish. Child me believed this. I figured if I got a wishing bone for Christmas that physical gift would mean I could get a wish instead! A wish was obviously less constrained than a present, which had to be physical. I did get my wishing bone too. I wished to be invincible. Haven't died yet either, so who is to say it didn't work. hollth1
End of Innocence
My seven year old just asked me, if I pretend to still believe in Santa, will he give me more presents? Guyutestash
I was a Santa for developmentally disabled adults, one of them climbed on my lap and said "I want to be normal". mushbo
Where Babies Don't Come From
I was Santa at Rainforest Cafe once a few years back and a little girl asked me if I had a sister factory because her mom and dad wanted to make one but can't. I told her that I cant make people and she immediately bawled her eyes out with the most ear-splitting screech you'd ever heard. rajjjjjj
My cousin told a mall santa he wanted a hot dog for Christmas. SteamPawn
A buddy of mine's son asked Santa for the board game operation a few years ago by saying "I want the operation". The guy playing Santa got real concerned and looked up at my buddy and asked what kind of operation. My buddy hadn't really connected the dots and just said something like "Uhhhhh Mattel I think." Then when they walked away it dawned on him why Santa had spent so much time with his kid. 7fingersphil
Concession Food is Expensive
I wrap presents at the mall as a fundraiser for my local animal rescue. We sit right outside of where Santa is so I talk to the kids afterward and ask them what they asked for.
A silly one that stuck with me from last year, from an absolutely adorable 5 year old little girl: "A trip to Disney world..."
And with a thoughtful look on her face: "...and Taco Bell gift cards." kaunis
Creepy Christmas Critters
Had a nine year old girl ask for worms for Christmas, looked up at her parents and they just kinda shrugged so I went with it and told her I'd see what I could do. lnadoo
When I was about 15 I had to sub in for our church's Santa because he was sick. First kid without missing a beat asked if I could get his daddy to stop beating him at (the game) Tekken for Christmas. basedonfacts
Considerate Dog Lover
I was the kid and I hear this story all the time. When I was 6 I asked Santa to convince my parents to let me get a dog. He asked why convince them and I told him it would be unfair to have a dog just show up, that we all had to pick it out together so everyone would be happy. Apparently my mom almost cried over that. Still had to wait 3 years before getting my dog though. Narryaworry
Chicks Dig It
I was Santa at my friends store a few years ago. A little boy sternly asked me for a mustache. Awesomepolice
My stepdad was a Disneyland santa and a kid asked for a penguin and he asked where the kid would keep it and she said "in the freezer." buhnahnuh
Bronies Were Not a Thing Yet
Older brother here. I was 5 and my sister was 4. We both sat in Santa's lap together and my sister just froze.
I felt like I had to cover for her so I told Santa my stuff and then said I wanted a My Little Pony to try and get my sister to snap out of it. She was still too scared and didn't say anything so Santa just looks at me like, "My Little Pony, wtf?"
Still glad I tried to get my sis some presents tho. jinspin
My daughter, two weeks ago, she said she wants to ask santa that I never get old.
I asked why ?
She said like that I can always remain handsome. Jess_Pinkman
Watch the World Burn
"Fire". I shit you not, the kid looked me right in the eyes and said "Fire". When I joyfully asked, "What do you mean by that?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said "I want Fire."
Last I looked there is no game, or form of entertainment called Fire, and this kid looked like he could be the Antichrist. timtheblueman
My dad did Santa for a couple years but had to stop because of the emotional toll it took on him. He was doing it at a poor area mall and the kids would come and ask for jackets and things like that for their siblings or parents and nothing for them. orange_lazarus1
An old coworker of mine was a volunteer Santa. A five year old boy climbs onto his lap, and my friend asks what the boy wants for Christmas. The boy exclaims "I want an orange goldfish!".
My friend glances over at the mom, who gives him the thumbs up, so he smiles and tells the boy that he'll make sure it goes on the list. But the boy worriedly leans closer and says:
Boy: Santa, you have to bring the fish in water, okay? Fish need water to live!
Friend: ~chuckles~ The fish will come with water, I promise!
Boy: And you have to feed it! They sell fish food at Walmart.
Friend: Uh, okay. The elves will make sure-
Boy: And you can't leave it in the sleigh! It will FREEZE AND DIE!
Friend: Don't worry, nothing will happen to the fish.
Boy: And it can't stay in the bag because it won't have air.
Friend: I have many requests for fish, and they've all gone to their homes safely. Don't worry-
Boy: You don't understand! You're magic! Animals need food and water and air!
Boy: ~jumps off Santa's lap, very exasperated~ MOM, SANTA'S GOING TO KILL MY FISH. waytoomanychoices
It's a Sure Sign
My dad was a "signing" Santa in his young 20s. Fluent in ASL and needed some extra cash during the holidays. They would have a special day where all the deaf kids would be able to come and sit on Santa's lap and sign what they wanted for Christmas. He would always recall how amazing it was that the kids were never surprised, excited, or in awe that Santa could sign. It was a given; of course Santa signs, it's Santa. isowseeds123
When my son was 4 he asked Santa for Asparagus because it was his favorite food (I kid you not).
He of course woke up on Christmas morning to a bundle of Asparagus wrapped in a bow (among his other gifts of course) I mean, what choice did we have? Ask and ye shall receive! Laszerus
Better to Give Than Receive
Back around 1990 I played Santa one time for my high school's Beta club or Octagon club, can't remember which - they were doing a Christmas dinner for disadvantaged children the week before Christmas. One little boy asked me for a Nintendo and I said "I'll see what I can do", and then a few kids later, his older sister came up and said "I don't want anything, but could you get my little brother a Nintendo? He wants one so bad." - It broke my heart so bad I almost started crying right then and there.
I asked if I could keep the Santa suit for a few more days, and Christmas day, I found out where they lived and got all my friends to donate any old games/equipment/accessories they didn't play anymore and gathered up about 25 games, a Nintendo, power-pad, light gun, power glove and sensors, and all the cables to hook it up, and one parent donated a 27 inch TV. I drove up to their house in that Santa suit, in my purple firebird (lol, it was hard to explain where the reindeer were) and gave that little boy a Nintendo.
I'd never seen a child so happy and I was trying my best not to cry with his mother, she was that mix of happy, excited, crying, covering her face, and couldn't stop thanking me. I hooked up everything and got the kids started with it and explained how everything worked and how to hook it up and they were just so amazed that Santa brought them all that and stayed all afternoon to play with them.
Because his older sister was so selfless and gave up her wish to him, we rounded up enough to get her a pink and purple bike with the streamers on the handlebars, and one of those Barbie camper playsets. She thanked me so sweetly for her presents and thanked me for her little brother's Nintendo. I tear up every time I think about it. pcliv
Santa on Vacation
I have not shaved in a few years. My now 24 year old son asked on his 21st birthday that I not shave and grow my beard out to see what would happen. Think of the Star Trek five year mission.
I now look like Santa, a Duck Dynastian, or a homeless person.
I was wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a pair of cargo shorts and a young girl around 5 to 7 years of age approached me in a department store and said, "Santa, I will be good forever if you could find my mom."
They had gotten separated in the store. I saw a woman trying to hook up with a guy not far away, but the child was not tall enough to see her.
I basically guilted that woman into buying her daughter something.
I now volunteer as Santa for sick children who are in the hospital at Christmas. santapoet
Santa for a kid's party my Navy command threw one year. One girl asked for her real daddy not to come back from deployment, because the one that stayed there while he was gone was a lot nicer.
I... err... johnnyseattle
I am Santa 7 days a week from the weekend before Thanksgiving through Christmas Eve. I have heard all kinds of stuff. I had a child ask me for a single stick of gum because his mom wouldn't allow him to have any. Had a girl ask for a box of Frosted Flakes for the same reason. I've had a child ask me to bring her daddy home from Afghanistan. I've posed with the portrait of a child who had just passed away a month prior. There have been children who have asked for live chickens and live pigs. One day I really need to write all of these down. One thing I can say, it's usually never boring. broberts69
There's no shortage of excellent horror fiction out there. Recently I read The Terror by Dan Simmons and can't remember the last time I felt that claustrophobic and nervous. But I am also a fan of quite a few classics. Are there any other horror books that capture grief as effectively as Stephen King's Pet Sematary? What other book evokes folk horror as beautifully as Thomas Tryon's Harvest Home? Let's not forget this wonderful classic: The Haunting of Hill House. I could rave about that one (and Shirley Jackson) for days. All of these books left their mark on me and yes, I'd include them on a list (if I were to make one) of some of the scariest books I've read.
People had their own opinions to share––and books to recommend––after Redditor Tylerisdumber asked the online community,
"What's the scariest book you've ever read?"
"Gerald's Game. I've read lots of Stephen King and this one scared me the most. Slept with the lights on for several nights."
Everything about this book is creepy. Don't even get me started on the... degloving. I'm sorry I even typed that word out.
"It's not a long story..."
"The Yellow Wallpaper.
It's not a long story and I'd highly recommend going in knowing little to nothing about it. It's brilliant and terrifying. Published in 1892 as well if that's any interest!"
Few stories make you feel this sad. A pretty stunning piece of work––and yes, unnerving. Can really get under your skin.
"I think it was mainly..."
"For some reason, Salem's Lot by Stephen King.
I think it was mainly because I was on a week-long hiking trip in the Australian bush and it got dark and scary at night. But damn, I had trouble sleeping for a couple of nights. Then the friend I was hiking with read it, and he couldn't sleep either."
This is probably my favorite early King––and for good reason. The sense of atmosphere is impeccable. Those characters are loveable and you genuinely care about what happens to them. Then the book veers from horror into tragedy. It's quite moving.
"Just the knowledge..."
"On The Beach.
It's the most soul-crushing book I've ever read, and there's really nothing scary in it.
Just the knowledge of impending death for everyone that feels so awfully heavy."
This is one of those books that makes you feel hopeless.
It's impeccably written but wow... it's a truly heavy read.
"You never knew..."
It's a classic. I found it to be immensely chilling. You never knew what would happen and the writing instilled a sort of dread. I read it in the dark before I went to bed until I finished it."
A book I can read and re-read over and over again. It's a beautiful horror novel. It's also a really fascinating window into the era and manages to say a lot about social and class mores.
"I'm Thinking of Ending Things by Iain Reid. Very creepy and unnerving, definitely scared me reading it at night."
I wanted to really like this one––unfortunately, I did not––but there's no denying that the first third or so (especially once the two protagonists get to the house) is pretty unnerving. Shame the payoff wasn't all that.
"It was disturbing and horrifying..."
"Helter Skelter. It's about the Manson murders and goes into quite a bit of detail. It was disturbing and horrifying because, unlike the King novels also mentioned, it's true. What they did to Sharon Tate is so absolutely devastating. Pure evil."
This book is gruesome and not for the faint of heart. The level of detail we dive into learning about the Tate-LaBianca murders is remarkable and also rather nauseating.
"So the book's characters..."
"Bird Box by Josh Malerman.
Forget the Netflix movie. The book's monsters are terrifying, in that you simply just don't know what they are or what they look like. They could be anything. What they are is enough to drive people insane by just being looked at.
So, the book's characters have to navigate a world mostly without one of our most used senses, and what's more terrifying than something you can't see?
This leads to some utterly scary scenes in the book that sent my heart racing and I had to put down for a breather."
It's a shame that movie wasn't all that and a bag of potato chips.
"It's a different kind of scary..."
"It's a different kind of scary, but The Handmaid's Tale. Atwood's dystopian nation feels not that far from reality sometimes, and it absolutely terrifies me."
We're going to go there.
Yes, this book is terrifying.
"I feel like the movie..."
"The Ruins, by Scott Smith, messed me up pretty good. My favorite kind of horror is psychological, and while there is a physical "entity" the real horror is the helplessness of this stranded group trapped by something they don't understand. Their desperate struggle to hold on to their sanity and the slow descent into hopeless desperation just really hit hard.
I feel like the movie was a fairly faithful adaptation, although it's been a while since I've seen it."
I love this book and have read it multiple times over the years. It's slow-going... and then the final one-hundred pages are just horrifying.
Well, if you haven't read any of these... What are you waiting for? Get on that. You won't regret it.
But also... the world is pretty scary right now, so we understand if you need to take a step back.
Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us in the comments below!
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Have you ever traveled to a city you've always heard good things about, only to be totally let down upon arrival?
When a friend insists we travel to certain cities because we would "just love it," they're setting the bar pretty high.
And a city can also boast a rich history or an attraction that makes us curious enough to find out what makes it so appealing.
But, alas, when we finally reach the destination, it's never exactly what we thought it would be.
Curious to hear from strangers online, Redditor tshirtguy2000 asked:
"What city is overrated?"
These are not officially real cities but they do have a rotating population.
It's Always A Party There
"As a former
slave associate at party city. I 100% agree."
"Lego City. There always has to be someone falling into the river."
"Cabot Cove, the murder capital of the world."
"Sure, the murders are all solved, but would you really want to live in a city with that much, easily solved, crime?"
Neighbor To Springfield
Shelbyville. Those f'kers steal trees from neighboring cities.
These were once considered destination cities but their popularity eventually took a nose dive.
"Atlantic City. Venture a few blocks off the boardwalk and it's incredibly depressing. Very clearly an area exploited by the big casinos while the locals have been driven to absolute poverty, while they still force a smile to work the shops that are required for the tourist traffic."
Lots Of Water
"Niagara Falls, Canada. I grew up there. Mayor pumps most of tax $ to casinos and tourism with flashy vegas-esque attractions."
"Myrtle Beach. I'm not even saying that it has a good reputation, I'm just saying that any shred of positive thinking about it makes it overrated."
Where A Creek Is An Exciting Attraction
"Lamb's Grove, Iowa. It's not the paradise on earth that people always say it is. Don't get me wrong, it's got great Chinese food but the motel 6 is meh at best."
Impressions for these cities fell far below expectation.
"Dubai. It's the clickbait of the world. 'We have the biggest/tallest/most expensive YOU WON'T BELIEVE when you see THIS...' It's hot as f*k, everything's a man-made tourist trap; labor exploitation and racism are rampant, and they try so hard to prove to the world how modern and Westernized they are. Really, it's just government propaganda."
"Miami. Horrible place filled with horrible people."
Truth be told, many cities can be overrated.
It just depends on a person's experience, or a resident's perspective about what it is about the location they live in that is nothing worth writing home about.
If I had to choose, I would say Las Vegas is overrated, but that's because there is nothing in Sin City that is of personal interest to me.
I may be severely judged for my opinion, but that is a gamble I'm willing to take.
The opposite sex can be a bit of a mystery sometimes. Our brains work differently just like our bodies and this can lead to certain sensitive questions. Guys tend to be a little less open but today it's time for the ladies to ask away. Even wondered what they really think or feel about their body, yours? Today's the day to get the answers you didn't know you needed.
Redditor William84000 asked:
“Women of reddit, what question do you have of men that you'd really like an answer to?"
His question started an informative thread for women to ask men the questions they've been wondering and receive honest, real-life answers.
“How long does it take to recover if you've been hit in the balls?” Snowy-avocado
“Anywhere from 5 minutes to literally turning to dust like we were Thanos snapped.” secondhand_organsdust whirls GIFGiphy
“The Big Dumb Object...”
“I've always wanted to know: why do you like loud machinery so much? For older men it's mowers, leaf blowers and such. For younger men, it's modified cars and motorbikes. What's the deal with the loud machines?” marshmellow_bunnyx
“Power and tools. Tools are a thing that gets stuff done, and they are loud because they contain the
natural essence power of violent explosions and fire. Most men like powerful things, instead of powerful people.”
“In sci-fi, this is called 'The Big Dumb Object', and is pretty much a trademark of sci fi books written by men” Connect-Zebra7173
To shave or not to shave?
“Does body hair on a woman bother you that much?" reillydean28
“Leg/arm hair? Don't even notice. Armpit hair? Not my thing but not my choice/decision. Pubic hair? I'd prefer not, but it's not going to stop me from getting the job done." wHUT_fun
It’s a power and control thing...
“Why send a d*ck pic?" stavinlawrence
“I think for most men it's a power dynamic thing. Either it gets them off or it just makes them feel in control."
“Then I assume there's the added bonus of if she likes it she might send a nude back. But these losers have a greater chance of buying a "get bigger penis pills" that actually work before a girl appreciates an unsolicited nude." InertialEclipse
"Do you notice the little things?”
“Do you notice the little things about women like a new hair cut, when they wear makeup or a nice outfit?” xforeverlove22
“I can't speak for everyone but for me, nope. Not at all. My uncle had a moustache for like 20 years and one day decided to shave it off. I didn't notice it. I noticed there was a weird atmosphere around me like ‘come on, say something’, so I small talked with him.”
“A few hours later after he left they asked me if I seriously didn't notice that his moustache was gone. My answer was ‘What moustache?‘ And makeup would definitly fly over my head.” PleaseTakeThisName
Lets just not touch people without permission...
“What things have women done that make you uncomfortable?" charloget
“Had a few grab my junk at random. Even had a couple that just forced a kiss on me. I don't usually experience women trying to pick me up, but the few times I did was never great. It was either negging, overly sexually aggressive and always in a group." bahamabanana
On today's episode of sink of float...
“Do penis' float like a buoy? I heard they do but have never been able to verify it.” TheFantasticV
“I mean it's buoyant but it can't really do much besides lazily sorta half float there. Still amused the f**k out of my wife to learn.” secondhand_organsGiphy
Everyone just wants to be loved...
“What makes you feel loved?” linedizzy
“A compliment, a hug or a kiss we don't have to initiate.” Nuitari8
“Do guys care if women get cosmetic procedures done?” dookieconductor
“I don't necessarily care about the work itself, I'd be more concerned about understanding why she felt like she wanted to get it done and help her feel body positive for whatever work has been done or if she feels like she needs work.” -notjosh-
Math will kill a mood everytime...
“What does it feel like when you're having sex and you're trying not to 'get there'? Is it frustrating? What do you do/think about to keep it from happening?" uhohoreolas
“I sometimes do math like 333*3... But often I am fine with just controlling things to focus mostly on her pleasure instead of mine. Tho sometimes she is excited and ends up moving in unaccounted ways while I am a hair away and there is no stopping it. I definitely don't find it frustrating. It is still very enjoyable." Fkire
Some of these Q&A's were unexpected but now we know! This important thing here though is knowing it's ok to ask questions sometimes.
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Everyone's got their own favorite food.
What are two foods that actually taste great together......even though most people don't eat them that way?
Breakfast is the most wonderful meal of the day. As the wise Leslie Knope once said, "Why would anybody ever eat anything besides breakfast food?" So mixing it up can feel blasphemous, but what if it's tasty?
Jam It On
"When I was growing up, it was standard procedure for us to put grape jelly on scrambled eggs. I did it when I went to college and everyone at the table stared at me. I still like it."
"That sounds gross af, but not too gross that I don't still want to try it. Haha"
Bringing People Together
"Peanut butter and maple syrup."
"My husband and I both grew up eating PB and syrup on our waffles. We took that as a sign it was meant to be."
"Peanut butter and syrup on waffles is one of the single best things I have ever had, also growing up with it"
Mustard?! Don't Let's Be Silly.
"Mustard with scrambled eggs. Actually I haven't had it in a while but from what I remember its really good"
"Mustard with eggs period"
Sauces and dips are critical to enjoying some foods. Mess with it too much and you risk ruining the delicacy. So that's why it's reassuring to see these people offering up their new spins on dip combinations.
Only For The Elegant Dining Experience
"Hummus and salsa mixed together with tortilla chips."
"Fancy bean dip."
Peanut Butter With Everything!
"Peanut butter and cheddar cheese (like the proper brick kind, not kraft cheese slices). When I was a kid I sometimes made myself pb and cheese sandwiches. They're very filling but delicious!"
"Toasted English muffin, butter, peanut butter, raspberry jam and marble cheddar on top. Lord have mercy on me."
"Add a litte hot sauce on the peanut butter."
Better Than Garlic Sauce?
"I already posted but I'm eating pizza with my friend right now and he likes his pizza with hummus."
"Hummus is good with so many things."
"So I make spaghetti noodles, but break up the raw noodles into smaller pieces. Once they're done I put in a an egg or two (mix it around) and let it cook. I swear it's not that bad. My Nonna always makes it for me when I go back to the Midwest to visit. It's good with parmesan cheese too."
And then there's these taste combinations. Mixtures so strange, you might just be willing to walk away from your phone or computer and try one now.
Sweet And Savory?
"Watermelon and feta cheese."
"With red onion and balsamic vinegar."
"Thats like the most basic summer thing in Greece, Balkans, Turkey together with some Uzo or Raki"
Who Lives In A Cheddar Under The Sea?
"Pineapple and cheddar."
"A guy at work introduced me to dipping a peanut butter and honey sandwich into chili. That was surprisingly great."
A Creative Spin On An Old Favorite
"Root beer float except with cherry Coke and chocolate ice cream. I was in middle school on a field trip, last in line at the cream shop, and ordered this after everyone else had done the standard root beer and vanilla. One of the cool girls who had never spoken my name before gave me this piercing look and asked if I would switch with her. I instinctively knew I would get zero benefit from this deal, so I said "Nope, ya gotta just remember it next time." That felt good."
Keep an open mind. Don't do this for every meal, sure, but always be ready to try something new.
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