JOIN
OUR EMAIL LIST!

"You See, What I Meant To Do Was..."

The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Bad circumstances are liable to arise no matter what you've set out to do. That precious family heirloom you've offered to carry for your significant other just so happened to slip from your hands, and all of a sudden you're no longer invited back to family dinner. It's happened to all of us. Reddit user, u/turtleofgirth, wanted to know about those mistaken moments when they asked:

What is something you've done with the best of intentions, but ended up making you look like an -sshole?

What's Better Than A Break-Up? A Dead Pet.

When I was a teenager, I was at a friendly dinner with some people and one of the girls attending was talking about a recent break up and it was making the entire table rather uncomfortable. In an attempt to change the topic and get people talking about something else, I told a story I had heard maybe a month before where someone's dog had been picked up by a hawk and never seen again.

A mutual friend nudged me. It was her dog.

I stared at the table the rest of the evening.

Big-Time-Sieve

Dog Block!

Sitting in a chair at a party surrounded by girlfriend's friends that I'm meeting for the first time. There is a folding TV tray of drinks behind and to the side of my chair which is in front of a couch. There is also a little dog with a case of the zoomies tearing around the room.

Eventually the dog tries to launch onto the couch, straight towards the tray of drinks. I try to gently deflect it's flight path away from the drinks. Instead it looked like I was a basketball player blocking a dunk. This dog goes flying to the side and lands on it's head yelping. Then it limps off whining while everyone stares at me.

2 minutes later it was perfectly fine and running around again but it was too late for me.

rahomka

What? Hold It Forever?

Held a door of an entrance to a hotel far too prematurely for a man in a wheelchair. I'm so socially awkward that I became paranoid of the fact that I held it beyond "societies standards" so I let it go at a time when he was just close enough and the door shut right as he was reaching the entrance.

I felt awful.

[username deleted]

It's The Thought That Counts?

A few years ago I'd moved in to a new (and my first!) apartment, and the cold winter months kept me from really running into many neighbors. I was making an active effort to at least be nice and friendly if I ran into anyone.

It was the last day of winter, I'm heading to work, and a neighbor is sitting outside on a bench, reading in front of the apartment building. This was an old dude, like, if he said he turned 30 on D-Day I might not be surprised. I wanted to say something, he was reading - enjoy you book? have a nice last day of winter?

Instead I made intense eye contact with this old guy, and said "Enjoy your last day" and hurried off. I was mortified but it was too late - and my delivery was awful since I realized what was happening part way through so it was sorta monotone and aggressive

I only saw him around the building one other time and we politely avoided eye contact.

brandnamenerd

If We Only Catalogued People

In eighth grade we were having a class discussion/debate about the whole Merry Christmas vs Happy Holidays thing and how Jewish people might feel about it. The genius idea in my head was that when somebody were to, say, check out at a register the info on the credit card would indicate to the cashier their denomination and they would know what to say.

Unfortunately I'm an idiot and didn't know the finer details of the atrocities in WWII. What actually came out of my mouth was that Jews should have something to indicate their faith so that the rest of the public would know how to treat them.... Yeah

f-ckgoldsendbitcoin

Kid Logic is Sound Logic

When I was a kid I went into the bath with my clothes on. I thought I was doing a huge favour to my mom by washing my clothes and myself at the same time.

Nope. She was pissed.

svenson_26

At Least It's Over Now?

Me and my ex were out for dinner, talking about our "relationship". How she went for a "vacation" and how she almost broke up with me for the things I wasn't doing for her (stuff around the house, waking up enough times in the middle of the night for the baby, not waking up early enough for the baby in the morning, stuff like that; I worked while she was on parental leave)

We ended up going for drinks after dinner. We got home and she passed out on the couch. I tried to carry her up to our room, got up the first set of stairs, tried the second set; couldn't do it. I lost my footing and accidently threw her into the wall, creating a huge hole in the drywall.

coolcrushkilla

Misread Intentions

Offering to pay when a friend says they can't go out because they don't have money.

Aimed for generous, landed on show off instead.

olivesolives

Toothless Troubles

At a christmas fair, I got some bags of caramelized almonds. Walked by a homeless guy dressed as santa, and I felt bad and didn't have any cash. So I was about to give him a bag of the almonds, but then he just sadly smiled at me and pointed at his mouth... where there was no teeth.

Maybe not exactly an -sshole, but I felt so bad.

theZabaLaba

There's No Coming Back From That Name

Oh man. When I was in high school, there was a pigeon stuck in a ledge. All the other students were looking at it, some were laughing at it (seriously, why?) and no one was doing anything. So I took it upon myself to rescue Sir Pigeon by gently helping him with his stuck leg. I held him in my hands for a while and he started wriggling, like he wanted to fly away.

Thinking this little guy wanted freedom, and with a crowd of about 50 kids watching, whispering and laughing, I let him go out into the what I thought was the sweet, sweet sky.

Except he dropped instantly.

He dropped down 5 floors.

I became a pigeon murderer that day :(

AOLchatparty1999

H/T: Reddit

Image by Mary Pahlke from Pixabay

There are few things more satisfying than a crisp $20 bill. Well, maybe a crisp $100 bill.

But twenty big ones can get you pretty far nonetheless.

Whether it's tucked firmly in a birthday card, passing from hand to hand after a knee-jerk sports bet, or going toward a useful tool, the old twenty dollar bill has been used for countless purposes.


Keep reading... Show less
Image by Jan Vašek from Pixabay

I realize that school safety has been severely compromised and has been under dire scrutiny over the past decade and of course, it should be. And when I was a student, my safety was one of my greatest priorities but, some implemented rules under the guise of "safety" were and are... just plain ludicrous. Like who thinks up some of these ideas?

Redditor u/Animeking1108 wanted to discuss how the education system has ideas that sometimes are just more a pain in the butt than a daily enhancement... What was the dumbest rule your school enforced?
Keep reading... Show less
Image by Angelo Esslinger from Pixabay

One of the golden rules of life? Doctors are merely human. They don't know everything and they make mistakes. That is why you always want to get another opinion. Things are constantly missed. That doesn't mean docs don't know what they're doing, they just aren't infallible. So make sure to ask questions, lots of them.

Redditor u/Gorgon_the_Dragon wanted to hear from doctors about why it is imperative we always get second and maybe third opinions by asking... Doctors of Reddit, what was the worse thing you've seen for a patient that another Doctor overlooked?
Keep reading... Show less
Image by nonbirinonko from Pixabay

When we think about learning history, our first thought is usually sitting in our high school history class (or AP World History class if you're a nerd like me) being bored out of our minds. Unless again, you're a huge freaking nerd like me. But I think we all have the memory of the moment where we realized learning about history was kinda cool. And they usually start from one weird fact.

Here are a few examples of turning points in learning about history, straight from the keyboards of the people at AskReddit.

U/Tynoa2 asked: What's your favourite historical fact?


Keep reading... Show less