People With Disabilities Reveal The Most Frustrating Well-Intentioned Things People Do
People With Disabilities Reveal The Most Frustrating Well-Intentioned Things People Do[rebelmouse-image 18358324 is_animated_gif=
Sometimes we see disabled people as people who help, but there is such a thing as over stepping your boundaries and assuming too much. Often times able-bodied people forget that people with disabilities are just living a different way of life, but they are still very capable of everything a non-disabled person is capable of.
ghiscari_ asks, Disabled people of Reddit, what things do well-intentioned people do that frustrate you?
The ignorance here is abysmal[rebelmouse-image 18346400 is_animated_gif=
When someone says "I can't imagine being sick like you. I think I'd kill myself" It's just so belittling. Yes, I'm sick, but life can still have joy and meaning despite that.
Sometimes the bright side is sour[rebelmouse-image 18357787 is_animated_gif=
Tell me that "it must be nice" not working, or that "at least you got some good years before this all happened!"
I would love to be able to work and raise my family out of poverty, and thinking about the time before my body gave up just makes me miss it and hate myself for not doing more.
A viewpoint people often don't explore[rebelmouse-image 18358326 is_animated_gif=
When I talk to people about my disabilities who then say "I'll never complain about my health issues again". Because they feel like my problems are worse. I know they mean well, like trying to say it's bad, they feel sorry for me, ect. But I wish people understood that my issues do not invalidate their problems. You still have all the right to complain, to be frustrated even for something as simple as a cold. It sucks to be sick no matter what, no matter who you are.
The shady compliment[rebelmouse-image 18358327 is_animated_gif=
As someone with learning disabilities it would be when people make comments like "Wow. I'm surprised you can even read" or "Isn't it amazing you can write?" for crying out loud people not everyone with learning disabilities is unable to read or write. You aren't complimenting me. You're insulting me.
The sympathy speech[rebelmouse-image 18349989 is_animated_gif=
For me, it has to be when people tell me that I'm "brave" or an "inspiration", or just assume that I'm some incredibly amazing person, before they have even learned my name. As flattering as it seems, they don't know me, and it just feels like they don't see me as a fully realized person with flaws and vices like anyone else. I've had dwarfism my whole life, so I've had a whole life to get used to it. It's not a constant battle that I struggle with - I rarely even think about it.
Say what?[rebelmouse-image 18347515 is_animated_gif=
Frame me as somehow inspirational for doing normal things like going to the shop, and PUSH MY WHEELCHAIR WITHOUT ASKING.
Best one was some dude comes up behind me, pushes my chair - which doesn't have handles - whilst saying 'it's nice to go fast sometimes' .. the f***?
When that extra effort is too much[rebelmouse-image 18346832 is_animated_gif=
Rushing ahead from 30ft behind to open a door, despite me saying I got it. To clarify, if you're ahead of me I'll think nothing of it, it's the sprinters from behind that bug me.
Leave the youngsters along![rebelmouse-image 18358328 is_animated_gif=
'You're too/so young!'
I'm 29 use a cane, can't walk most days from a annular tear/stenosis/sciatica and I hobble everywhere when I do walk.
Or demanding my medical history as to what I've tried to fix my issue. You don't need to know I've taken more pain meds than Tommy Lee during the worst parts of my injury.
The self proclaimed doctor[rebelmouse-image 18350933 is_animated_gif=
When I mention my medical diagnosis people say "oh I know someone who has that! They changed their diet and it cured them!"
Well 1. There's no cure for it so... and 2. this disease affects people differently. It's great that your friend is living a functional, normal life with little to no complications but it's not the same for me.
I also hate being recommended acupuncture, quacky treatments, etc. My case is severe. I need actual medication to treat it. Turmeric might help, sure, but it's not a cure. I am doing everything I can to take care of my body. I've researched my disease and am going to a specialist. There's nothing you can say that I haven't heard or read already.
Don't touch![rebelmouse-image 18358329 is_animated_gif=
I'm legally blind and was learning to use a cane in case my vision ever got worse, I was at a movie theater practicing with my cane and I had to use the bathroom so as I'm leaving the bathroom this random stranger comes up, grabs my arm and tries to lead me around and I'm thinking to myself: "don't you see that I have a cane?, do you not know what it's for?", my cane is my third hand it's supposed to help me navigate my surroundings. Coming up and grabbing a stranger's arm is the equivalent of pushing someone's wheelchair without their permission.
Incurable means it doesn't go away....[rebelmouse-image 18350554 is_animated_gif=
I want to throttle people when they tell me that I can cure my genetic illness by mindfulness meditation and that if it doesn't work, I'm clearly not trying hard enough. Or that I can cure it by drinking smoothies, taking vitamins, staring at the sun, etc.
And the best head desk moments come when people say, "I hope you get better soon." Thanks, Susan. There's no cure, and you're missing the definition of chronic, but thanks.
You don't know what's best[rebelmouse-image 18358330 is_animated_gif=
Telling me "you're too young to use a stick!", or asking me things like "don't you think you'd get more energy if you just went for a nice walk in the sunshine?"
I have chronic fatigue and pain among other things - if I can't get out of bed, a walk is pretty much impossible.
Wait to be asked[rebelmouse-image 18358331 is_animated_gif=
When they take things out of my hands to 'help me'....its nice and all to think I might need help, but wait for me to ask you, 'kay?
Asking anyone what's wrong with them is rude![rebelmouse-image 18358332 is_animated_gif=
For some reason, complete strangers think they have the right to demand my medical history. Just because we're standing together on the escalator doesn't mean you get to ask: "what happened to you" or even worse "what's wrong with you."
You don't make the rules[rebelmouse-image 18347291 is_animated_gif=
Type 1 diabetic. Most offenses occur due to a lack of knowledge about the disease- which is fine, I don't expect everyone to be doctors. But trying to suggest "cures"? No grandma, eating that Indian spice you heard about won't cure me. And my biggest pet peeve: "you can't eat that." Why, yes I can.
Purely offensive[rebelmouse-image 18358333 is_animated_gif=
Quadriplegic with a pinched c4-c5 injury.
1. People who assume my penis doesn't work because I'm in a wheelchair.
2 The Pastor who told me: ''the reason God hasn't healed you is because you don't believe enough''
3. People who Help me when I didn't ask for it.
4. People who Pray for me in public
Wow...really people?[rebelmouse-image 18358335 is_animated_gif=
Deaf person here. I absolutely hate it when people shout at me. That doesn't help at all!! Or talk suuuuper slooooowly. I'm not a moron you idiot. Just talk at a normal speed, try not to cover your face, and I should get what you say.
No means no[rebelmouse-image 18344990 is_animated_gif=
Not listen when I decline offers of help.
I'm a young woman who uses a wheelchair and for whatever reason, men over 55 absolutely CANNOT pass by without offering me help (even if I am literally just sitting in a park on my lunch break) which, sure, fine, I appreciate the sentiment.
What is super infuriating, however, is when I say "No thanks, I'm fine" they don't stop, often to point of me having to make a bit of an "angry voice" scene before they will leave me alone.
Small service dogs count too![rebelmouse-image 18358336 is_animated_gif=
Small dogs can be service dogs STFU.
I already posted about my number 1 complaint, but this is for my little cousin. He is epileptic and the family dachshund was his service dog for alerting about incoming seizures. And if he was alone, like sleeping in his bed and had one, the dog would freak the f*** out (Loud barking to wake his parents) and get help. But so many times he told by people that she could not be his service animal cause she was too small, or that he was lying. Pissed me off a lot.
Disability does not mean decreased intelligence[rebelmouse-image 18358337 is_animated_gif=
Hear the words "I have ASD" and then proceed to treat me like a child and start explaining really simple s*** to me like I don't know. I'd been doing independently for months before admitting my diagnosis and now I'm "incapable".
Also when I say "sorry I'm deaf" and people dumb down their words and basically start talking like they're talking to a 3yo to me. I can understand more than 4 word sentences thanks.
Sometimes, in order to find the love of our lives, we have to explore what's out there.
Often encountering people who we know fairly early on are just not a good fit.
In some cases, they're perfectly nice people but don't ignite the spark in us and lack any kind of chemistry.
Then there are those who truly astound us, and not in a good way.
The sort of people where describing them as "not the sharpest knife in the shed" would be an understatement.
Sometimes, this is clear from the minute we meet them. Other times, the realization comes a bit later.
"People of Reddit, what was your “I’m dating a f*cking idiot” moment?"
"Watched a doc that explained how sharks have electricity receptors which they use to hunt. he said 'that's not possible'."
"Sharks are supposedly millions of years old but we only invented electricity a hundred years ago'."- Key-Lie250
If You Have To Prove It...
"He thought the outlet plug covers (for childproofing) meant the outlet was out-of-order."
"He literally had nothing plugged into the walls of his entire living room."
"He also mentioned how smart he was any chance he got.... usually a prime indicator."- Airport_Fart
It's Certainly A Hustle. HOWEVER...
"He kept applying for jobs and getting denied instantly."
"At the time, I didn’t understand and was upset for him."
"Come to find out, this 26-year-old was applying for jobs driving armored trucks for banks."
"With a record for stealing money from cash registers."
"I didn’t know at the time that he had ever been arrested, but this man literally had robbery and theft on his record, and couldn’t understand why an armored truck company wouldn’t hire him."- cathherine
When It Rains, It Pours...
"My ex didn't think it rained over the ocean because there was enough water there already."
"She was shocked it rained when we were on a cruise."- 1_disasta
Let's Hope She Didn't Test This Theory...
"How alcohol content percentage works."
"We argued for months that 10% as alcohol content remains the same even if you halved the bottle."
"She said nope, if you halved the bottle then the alcohol content would be 5%."
"Engineer graduate that too."
"She works for a software firm."
"For 12 years."
Some People Just Don't Grasp The Concept Of Math...
"My ex thought he could play hockey and found what he thought were the holy grail of skates."
"He bought them for $200 (I don't know the price as it was a long time ago)."
"His friend, who lived in a city an hour and 20 minutes away, told him he got the same skates for $195."
"So my ex, in his old Camaro that cost $50 in gas round trip, returned the skates he got for $200 and drove 1 hour and 20 minutes to get the skates that were $5 cheaper."
"That should have been the biggest red flag."
"But sadly, it turned out I was the f*cking idiot who stayed with him for a few more years."- Flipgirlnarie
"I had to explain to a grown woman that 20% is not always $20 when converted to currency."- DahvRom
"Was just lounging about one Sunday and skiing came on the TV."
"At one point the commentator said that contestants reached 100 km/h at that point in the race."
"The ex literally shouted bullsh*t at the telly."
"I looked at her and asked why..she replied that there was no way that they could tell how far they'd go in an hour since the race was only two minutes long."
"Another time, 'I have an aunt who lives in London, is that near England'."- Allydarvel
One Step Behind
"I introduced him to my stepsister."
"He said, 'weird, you guys look nothing alike'."- Saminotsammy
Get Out Of My Kitchen!!!
"He was trying to make cookies and kept opening the oven for extended periods of time, letting out all the heat."
"When I told him he was letting all the heat out by opening the door wide open and staring at the cookies, he told me I didn't know how ovens work because the temp setter said 400 so it was 400."
"Took an hour to bake 1 sheet of cookies and said 'I don't know why it's taking so long'."
"Also insisted on doing this on Thanksgiving, tying up my oven and was pissed off when he found out the turkey would take 3hrs to cook."
"As I'm sure you can imagine... Did not work out."- pocket4129
Liking Them Doesn't Make You One Of Them...
"It was when vampire-related shows and movies were in the height of their popularity."
"He became obsessed with vampires."
"When we would go outside, he started to act like the sun was hurting him, and he would shield his face with his hands while groaning in pain."
"Think of Jim from The Office with his vampire prank... only he was more dramatic... and serious."- not-a-real_username
Some Like It Hot...
"When he left the window open in the middle of summer because the air conditioning made the house too cold."
"He didn’t turn off the air conditioner and argued that it wouldn’t have made a difference."- Lovable_Minion
Dogs Do Love Car Rides...
"I went on a couple dates with a woman who owned two large energetic dogs."
"When she bought them she was informed that she'd need to walk them every day to get them exercise and burn off energy."
"To save time, instead of walking them she'd take them for a drive and thought that accomplished the same thing."- diiejso
So Much For Going Green...
"We drove past a windmill on a windy day."
"She commented how it was too windy out and they should turn the windmill down."
"She was dead serious..."- ink4n3
Washington And Jefferson Do Look Sort Of Alike... Don't They?...
"She found a coin in the couch and exclaimed 'WOW this is a REALLY big nickel'
"To which I responded 'That's because its a quarter'."- 404-soul-not-found
As Forest Gump once said, "stupid is as stupid does," so intelligence doesn't always go hand in hand with kindness and generosity.
Nor can we be too sure that these instances are what ultimately led to these relationships coming to an end.
Though, one can't blame someone for dumping anyone who thought they'd turned into a vampire...
People Who've Slept With Their Friends' Significant Others Break Down The Aftermath
It's a wonderful feeling when you think you've met "the one."
Someone who is so perfect in absolutely every way that you can't help but think that they must be too good to be true.
Only to make the unpleasant discovery that they are, indeed, too good to be true.
As they neglected to tell you one important piece of information: they're seeing something else.
A discovery that is naturally met with rage, sadness, and confusion.
As well as the occasional unexpected, unusual development down the line.
"Guys that sleep with other guy's girlfriends, do you feel bad afterwards? Why or why not?"
Lose A Significant Other, Make A Friend!
"Hooked up with a girl at a party once."
"We hit it off and arranged to go on an actual date the next week."
"About an hour later someone told me her BF had just showed up."
"I gave the dude a beer, explained that I had no idea she wasn't single and that I'm sorry."
"He gave me a massive hug and thanked me for being upfront."
"We both told her to f*ck off and spent the rest of the night drinking and singing karaoke together."
"I didn't feel bad; I was lied to, he was betrayed, she was a *unt, nothing more to it really."- 5Volt
Pulled The Plug
"I did it twice not knowing they had bfs."
"Yes, I felt bad afterwards and I totally cut contact when I found out."- born_again_timCartoons Button GIF by NickelodeonGiphy
"When I was in college a married woman tried to hide her marriage… to a deployed Marine."
"As soon as I found out, I bounced."
"I never condone cheating."- ItsbeenBroughton
Two People Were Duped
"I actually have a story about this."
"So I hooked up with a girl who had a long term boyfriend at the time."
"I didn't know and we had few encounters over a two month period."
"One day I was curious and decided to look at her socials and that's when I found out about him."
"I never bothered to look because I was being ignorant and it was first time being in a fwb situation so I was excited and wanted to keep it secret."
"As I scrolled down her socials all I saw were pics of them on expensive dates and trips and I just felt so bad for the guy."
"I felt like I had become the thing I hated the most."
"So that same night I decided to DM him about the situation and send him the texts between me and her to show him proof."
"He then called me and sounded really hurt holding back tears and all I could do was just say sorry over and over."
"But he thanked me and told me he would be leaving her."
"I then blocked her number and thought it was over with but later on that week the girl showed up at my place of work and damaged my car."
"Although I was angry at the moment I chose not to press charges as advised by the police (not USA) because the damage was minimal."
"But yea that's my story."
"On a positive note he found a new girl who looks way better and they equally appreciate each other outwardly on their socials so yes it was a happy ending."- rankyyBeyonce Lemonade GIFGiphy
Even The Idea Is Hard Enough
"I lost a mate this way."
"We were really close friends and he was going through a rough time with his then girlfriend."
"She decided to get back at him by writing some bullsh*t in her journal about her and I hooking up and then conveniently left it out so he would see it."
"It was 100% untrue."
"Friend confronted me on it and I told him it was untrue but he didn’t believe me."
"We stopped talking after that."
"He eventually reached out to me about 6 months later after she admitted to him that she had made it all up."
"The damage was done and we never were the same again."- tizod
This Opens Many Questions...
"I had a brief friends with benefits arrangement with a girl who had a boyfriend."
"I didn't know the guy, and I was young and impetuous at the time."
"After time went on, I started to feel bad about it."
"It all came to a head when she told me she wanted to leave him to be with me and I said no."
"She asked why not."
"I said I couldn't trust her as a girlfriend."
"She asked why."
"I said, you've literally spent the last 2 months cheating on your boyfriend."
"Why else do you think?"- IdontdanceforfunFox Accuse GIF by New GirlGiphy
An Agreement Or Just Her Policy?
"I hooked up with a lady at my gym, she didn't say sh*t about being married, she came to my place the two times we hooked up."
"I saw her again at the gym with a dude, when he went off to go do something I went over and said hi, she said don't talk to her here with her husband around, she will call me later."
"She called me later and told me her husband worked out of town a ton, when in town she was with him, when he's out she's free to do as she pleases."
"We did not meet up again."- SomeRandomUser00
Thankfully, They Grew Up...
"I did it knowingly during High School."
"I was dating and she was too, but we both had issues in our relationships and we didn't know how to figure them out."
"Clinging to our toxic relationships we found solace in each other and enjoyed spending time together."
"We ended up fooling around and after we had sex, we both stopped."
"We stayed friends for a while and both continued dating, but eventually both of us were single."
"I regret it, he doesn't know about it, I told my gf and she accepted my apology, even though we did break up about a year later."
"I'm not proud of myself and I still hate myself for it."- Slippy_666
Nipped In The Bud...
"A buddy’s wife tried to get with me once."
"I told her she had 90 seconds to call her husband (my best friend from High school), put the call on speaker, and explain to the two of us why she was a complete POS…or I’d call him myself."
"They divorced the next month."- Pennameus_The_MightySeason 2 No GIF by MartinGiphy
Some Secrets Aren't Worth Keeping
"If i know she cheated with me on her dude I let the dude know.""
"i hate that kind of people."- DaEpicBob
It's hard to place blame on those who unknowingly got together with partnered individuals.
Those who knew what they were doing, on the other hand, should have expected there to be consequences of some sort or another.
Do you have any similar experiences, let us know in the comments below.
People Break Down The Exact Moment They Realized Their Best Friend Was A Complete A-Hole
Sometimes we're so blind to the faults of others.
Learning the hard truth about a best friend is never easy.
Especially if that particular truth is the fact that they were never a good friend or good person, to begin with.
But we see people how we see them.
And one day, we see beyond what we want.
You sort of feel bamboozled.
But when someone tells you who they are, whether with their words or their actions, believe them.
Redditor RealTourelle11 wanted to hear how friendships fell apart, so they asked:
"What made you realize your best friend was actually a complete a**hole?"
I've realized far too many times too late, that some people need to go.
Not all friends are friends.
EXCUSE ME?!real housewives fight GIF by RealityTVGIFsGiphy
"When she told me she was cheating on her husband, and then I found out she was cheating with MY husband."
$40 worth of snacks...
"I was poor and in college, I had the flu really really bad one week and asked my friend (he lived in a dorm across the hall) to go to the convenience store in the dorm lobby and get me something to drink and he could get whatever for himself too. He got me my soda and himself $40 worth of snacks."
"Didn’t notice at the time and I ordered us a pizza, he knew it was all I was going to have to eat for the next few days, and he snuck into my room and ate the leftovers while I was passed out on cold medicine."
"I didn’t even really know how to respond. Like I was already buying him snacks and feeding him… he had a meal plan on campus (I didn’t)… why act like that?"
"When I trusted and believed he was like a brother only to have him steal thousands of dollars from me. The money didn’t even matter but the treason hurt for years."
"Happened to me too. A girl who was like a sister to me stole $80K from my business (her husband did, with her knowledge) and then turned her back on me while I was going through chemo. To be fair, I did tell her the worst thing would be if I lost a huge amount of money like that and that I’d rather have cancer again so I did give her the method to hurt me the worst. So there’s that."
"Over time we lost contact, then she only reached out when she needed money. I let this go on too long until I found out I was pregnant with my first, and told her then I wouldn't send any money after that. She still asked, my daughter is now over 1.5 yo, and she had never even met her. I ended up blocking her and telling her not to bother trying to reach out anymore."
Conversation Over...Talking Blah Blah Blah GIF by Wiz KhalifaGiphy
"I started to realize that they only ever talk about themselves. They rarely ask me a question, but then cut me off while I’m answering to make it about them."
Why can't people realize they need to shut up?
Probably because they don't care.
And Me?Bye Bye Goodbye GIF by Mickey MouseGiphy
"Realizing I am always there for them but it is never reciprocated or even acknowledged or even feigned interested in any thing I am doing in life."
"Best friend since elementary. In high school When I told her I no longer wanted to be friends because she was mean to others all the time, including me- she said that I had to be friends with her cuz she was my friend In elementary and middle school even tho everyone told her not to be, and that everyone talked behind my back about how gross and weird I was and she stayed my friend anyhow. She worded it like she was doing me a huge favor by being my friend and that I somehow owed her for that charity."
In the end...
"Probably when my gf at the time admitted to sleeping with him and my three other guy friends while we were together. Not in an embarrassed way either, she was throwing it in my face to hurt me."
"I hoped against my own instincts that it wasn't true but I asked him and knew instantly from the look in his eyes that it was. Basically lost my whole friend group overnight, but... ended up finding much better friends in the long run. It all works out."
The Single Life
"All we ever talked about was her - how she hated being single, who she dated, how jealous she was of other people with partners. She skipped my dad's funeral. She ignored my housewarming party. She'd ignore me for weeks at a time, then suddenly call me up crying because she got dumped."
"I drove her to surgeries and sat waiting to drive her home. Watched her kids. Sat through a hundred weepy nights."
"Then she found a relationship. I have seen her 1x in the past 9 months (because I invited her to get together) and haven't heard from her in 3. I guess she must be happy now, doesn't need me to be a shoulder to lean on. She wasn't ever interested in being a friend to me. I was just someone to cheer her up when she was feeling down."
LoserShaking Head Reaction GIF by GIPHY NewsGiphy
"When he got his girlfriend pregnant he got 6 weeks of paternity leave. He lived with me and she had her own place. For months after the child was born he sat home taking advantage of his paid vacation playing 10 hours of video games a day while she struggled with the child."
Some people just need to go from our lives.
Do you have any experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.
People Confess Why They Think Waiting Until Marriage To Have Sex Is A Good Or Bad Idea
Why is sex such a dramatic aspect of life?
It carries such weight in our lives.
For some, there's a big debate about waiting for marriage.
Other want to know if they're compatible (both emotionally and sexually) before tying the knot.
Whether it's for religious or other reasons, this topic can put a strain on many adult relationships.
First and foremost, we do know we have to do what's best for us.
Redditor EveningAd3633 wanted to hear about all the reasons to abstain or let loose, so they asked:
"Do you think that waiting until you are married for sex is a good idea? Why or why not?"
Redditors from around the globe wanted to share their experiences.
"I know a couple who are waiting until marriage. They both agree on it and are fine with it. But they have ridiculously over the top tickle fights. - _- It makes me so uncomfortable to witness. I'd almost rather see them bang in front of me. It's band camp levels of tension that just won't ever go away."
Do we Fit?
"No. We waited and we were not compatible… eventually, he cheated and we got divorced. Also, being compatible sexually is not a reason to get married either."
"I don’t understand how people don’t get this. It’s the same as any other aspect of marriage—if you aren’t compatible, you shouldn’t get married. It would be like dating someone, and the entire time you’re both blindfolded."
"Then after you’re married you can FINALLY take your blindfold off only to find out your partner looks like someone set their face on fire and put it out with a pick axe. Every aspect of compatibility is important in a marriage."
"Yes, you both change and evolve but if you’re not both 100% committed to weathering these changes and adapting as a couple, then your marriage will probably not be a happy one!"
"Personally, I think it's good to wait a while before having sex with someone to actually know them, but I wouldn't wait to be married... I think you should know the person that you are marrying on all aspect."
"WELL SAID - and just to take on so many of the other opinions on this thread, it is NOT a good idea to wait until after marriage. It’s not 'fine if you want' it’s actively a terrible idea IF you care about having a sex life. Hoping it will work out through sheer luck? Idiotic."
"No. Not saying you should f**k everyone that propositions you but you should make sure you are compatible with someone before marrying them. Too many people find out too late they can't stand someone's actual personality. Things change after sex, people calm down and get real, they stop being on their best behavior. Get to know the real person before you marry an intolerable a**hole."
Stay CalmRelaxing Chill Out GIF by Talk StoopGiphy
"If you want to wait, go for it. But don’t set yourself up for waiting until marriage, and then rush the marriage part just to get to the sex."
"Kid I work with is 24. Just got married. Did the deed. Now has a kid on the way. All within 3-4 months of meeting his wife at church. Great kid. But you can see it in his face already. The guy is STRESSED."
Roulettetv land casino GIF by Lopez on TV LandGiphy
"Paraphrasing Lewis Black: If you wait until marriage to have sex, then you are a gambler on a level I can't even freaking imagine."
"I would say it’s not about waiting until you are married but waiting until it is right for both of you. That’s the key point that a lot of people get wrong. They get to it for reasons other than it being right or feeling right."
"So if your belief is that you should have committed to a marriage, then that is what is going to feel right for you. It could also be that within hours (or even minutes) you can feel that it is right for you. Don’t judge the duration, judge the feeling that you have."
Cause and Effect
"I’ve heard horror stories of marriages being destroyed because it wasn’t until after wedlock that they discovered their sex drives were entirely different. It causes depression, it causes divorce, and in some extreme cases, it pushes people to cheat. I just don’t think it’s worth it to wait when it could potentially make or break a relationship."
He was right...
"My step dad always told me, 'You might like the pair of jeans you have, but there's always a chance you'll find a pair that fits you better.' He was right. There was no shame in having sex before marriage, and he also taught me that as a female, it is perfectly OK to buy and have the condoms. It's also ok to reject a guy if he doesn't want to be safe. Your body is worth more than his sexual pleasure."
More than talk...Heart GIF by BuzzFeedGiphy
"No. Unless you're both asexual, sexual compatibility is an important part of a relationship, and that's not something you can determine just through conversation."
"Sexual compatibility is important for asexual people too, as in having a similar lack of interest in it."
Thanks to these Redditors for opening up and sharing on such an important topic.
Some really valid points were made about communication, expectation, and compatibility.
Do you have any thoughts to share? Let us know in the comments below.