People With Cancer Reveal When They First Realized Something Was Wrong
People With Cancer Reveal When They First Realized Something Was Wrong
[rebelmouse-image 18358263 is_animated_gif=Cancer can present itself in a variety of ways, and sometimes, it presents no symptoms at all. The moral of the story? Don't ignore abnormalities in your body, and never try to "tough it out."
HippoLips asked, People who have/had cancer, how did you know something was wrong?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
As someone who has suffered from ulcerative colitis, this is too real.
[rebelmouse-image 18358265 is_animated_gif=My doctor had me get a colonoscopy because of blood in my stool. He thought it might be an ulcer caused by some medication; turned out to be a tumor. Turned out to be a very large stage 1 instead of the stage 2-3 they originally thought. I lucked out big time. I was under fifty, hardly a typical age for it to happen.
Catching it early is the key.
[rebelmouse-image 18358266 is_animated_gif=I went for a general checkup because I was concerned about some red spots on my arms. The doctor almost didn't believe anything was wrong until the results from the blood work came back. The spots were petechiae from low platelets and my white blood cells were through the roof. I have leukemia. Actually, I'm in remission now.
Never ignore lumps or chronic fatigue. They are sign something is very, very wrong.
[rebelmouse-image 18358267 is_animated_gif=I was super tired all the time, like sleep 18 hours a day and hardly able to keep my eyes open the other 6. Then I noticed a lump on the side of my neck. Turned out to be Hodgkin's lymphoma, I have my 2nd chemo on Wednesday.
Well this is terrifying.
[rebelmouse-image 18352402 is_animated_gif=I had a headache that didn't go away for an entire week, I kept vomiting, and I was having weird episodes, which were later diagnosed as seizures. It was a brain tumor.
Sarcoma consists of cancerous growths in connective tissue.
[rebelmouse-image 18358268 is_animated_gif=My daughter at 12 was complaining that her knee was sore. We chalked it up to growing pains. Then one evening she stood up from her chair and fell, again complaining that her knee was very sore. She had a tumor on her left femur - osteogenic sarcoma. Eight months of chemo followed, along with knee replacement surgery. She's been cancer free for nearly 16 years now.
Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma is the more common type of lymphoma, and has a relatively high survival rate.
[rebelmouse-image 18358269 is_animated_gif=I'd been feeling run down and kind of tired, but I put that off to having family in town staying with me. After they'd left I didn't recover quite as quickly as I normally would, thought I was catching a cold. I met up with my typical Sunday night dinner group and while I was sitting in the restaurant I started getting chills. So I went to my car, grabbed a sweatshirt and sat in the sun. It was probably 80 degrees and I was shivering, teeth chattering and chilled to the bone. I went home and bundled up and fell asleep on my couch. When I woke up I was burning up, temperature 104.3. Not good.
Called my bff (she's an ER nurse) and she put me in touch with one of her docs. He wrote me a prescription for an antiviral. I started taking it and it didn't help. I was getting weaker and weaker, barely had an appetite and coughing so bad my bladder would leak.
After a week I went to urgent care. They put me on an antibiotic and diagnosed me with a lung infection. The antibiotics didn't help. After a week of cold sweats, no appetite, weakness and a fever that wouldn't go away I went to the ER. They admitted me and kept me in the hospital to try and diagnose my illness. After 8 days and numerous tests they had my fever under control but not the reason for my sickness. I was home when the hematologist called me and told me I have Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma, and it's in my bone marrow.
I just had my second round of chemo last week. Things went pretty well and I didn't get too sick afterward. Today I shaved my head because my hair was falling out fast and in handfuls. I have a good prognosis and the cancer I have is very treatable. I hope those of you out there who are dealing with cancer are doing okay, hugs to you all.???????
Cancer is often misdiagnosed or overlooked in children.
[rebelmouse-image 18358270 is_animated_gif=I started my first period when I was 12 and it didn't stop for three months but my doctor just continued to say it was because it was my first period. Then I suddenly looked like I was six months pregnant but they still kept saying I was fine. It's only when my mum shouted at them that they sent me for more tests and discovered my stomach was swollen because it was releasing fluid to protect itself from something abnormal. That turned out to be a tumor in my left ovary, which was the size of a grapefruit. They caught it just in time before it spread and I had six months of intensive chemotherapy after surgery. I've just celebrated my 10 year anniversary of being in remission which is awesome! I still keep an eye on my periods though xD
Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia occurs when bone marrow produces too many immature lymphocytes, a type of white blood cell.
[rebelmouse-image 18358271 is_animated_gif=It took me a really long time before I thought anything was wrong. Over the course of 6 weeks, I went from being able to run a 7-minute mile to having to sit down on a bench to rest halfway through walking home from school (less than a mile). I asked the running subreddit, and they said it was probably just a lung infection or something else treatable with antibiotics. Red spots (petechiae) popped up on my upper arms and calves. At 130 pounds, I felt like I was carrying an extra two hundred pounds with me when I tried to climb stairs. When I finally convinced myself to go to the doctor, they drew some blood, saw the white blood cell count and instantly referred me to a hospital when they saw the enormous white blood cell count. At this point I still wasn't concerned, thinking it would all turn out to be something else, that it couldn't, wouldn't, shouldn't be cancer. When I got admitted to the hospital, I was thinking how I would be out of there by morning. It didn't really hit me until I had been there for almost a week and knew the exact type (Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia) before I actually even started to worry.
Doctors estimate that 3 percent of all cancers are a result of Lynch Syndrome.
[rebelmouse-image 18358272 is_animated_gif=I had colon cancer at age 25. I really started to notice how long it would take to clean up when I was at work. I had the feeling of an elephant sitting on my chest. It usually takes me an hour to clean up and go home but my oxygen levels were so depleted I could only tolerate 5 minutes of exertion before I had to rest. I held off for a month with going to the doctor because I didn't have any insurance at the time. My blood counts were all jacked up, red/white blood cells and iron counts were so bad to this day they have no idea how I was walking/talking and not in a coma. I also lost a ton of weight, I usually hover around 285 and was down almost 100 pounds., but I didn't really think anything of it since I lost the weight over a couple months and was exercising, dieting, and working a second physical labor job so I just figured in 3 months I had lost some weight. I didn't realize how drastic the weight loss was until I was at the hospital. I started the second job in August and never went into the hospital until January. I didn't have any major complications until December and had to wait until January for my insurance to kick in.
Luckily for me, a colonoscopy revealed the issue and the caught it before it spread to my lymph nodes.
25 is really young for colon cancer, and I was youngest in my doctor's career to be diagnosed with it. Turns out I have Lynch Syndrome which genetically predisposes me to develop cancers at a younger age and puts me at a higher risk of getting another cancer.
I turn 30 next Monday and thankfully have not had any recurring issues for this.
When body dysmorphia works in your favor...
[rebelmouse-image 18358273 is_animated_gif=Fortunately, my teenage insecurities probably saved my life- I was in a store trying on a swimsuit and was basically staring at myself in the mirror thinking how awful I thought I looked (not uncommon for 16-year-old girls, unfortunately) and I noticed a few very, very dark spots on my back and arms. It looked like I had sharpied on dots in some places, it was really weird but I think it was because of the awful fluorescent lighting that they looked so pronounced. I knew my family had a history of very serious skin cancer, but I'd never been tanning and always wore sunblock so I thought there was no way. My dad made me go in for a skin check just to be safe, and it turns out I had multiple malignant melanomas of varying stages on my arm and both upper and lower back. Luckily even the worst of them were caught early enough that I was just left with some badass scars from the biopsies and subsequent tissue removal, but I still think if I hadn't gone to H&M that day how much worse it could have been.
Talk about a lucky break...
[rebelmouse-image 18358274 is_animated_gif=I was walking the dogs and I suddenly felt a sharp pain on the left side in between my ribs and simultaneously on my left shoulder. After almost a month of misdiagnoses, I went from healthy 16 ?????-?year-old to stage 4 histiocytic sarcoma, a rare form of lymphoma and given 2 months to live. I am now 20 years old and in remission.
"Toughing it out" is the worst decision one can make.
[rebelmouse-image 18358275 is_animated_gif=In the early stage (1-3 months prior) I started to become more and more lethargic & weak in general; at the time I thought I was just lazy and falling out of shape. I lost the energy to do most basic things but never thought it was totally out of the norm. Food also became uninteresting and I generally lost my appetite (normally I'm a big eater/foodie.) As a side sleeper, I noticed my arm would fall asleep during the night semi-frequently (I'd wake up and couldn't feel it at all, it freaked me out at the time.) I also started having some pretty decent night sweats (while feeling freezing cold) and picked up a persistent toothache that didn't go away.
The final straw was when I went to the dentist to get my wisdom teeth removed due to that toothache. After the surgery, my body basically crashed (couldn't heal itself.) I started to get weaker much more rapidly, my skin got very pale, and my lips basically lost most of their color. 2 days later, I fully passed out for the first time in my life.
Now this will seem crazy, but I'm the type of person who never goes to the doctor for anything, I always just "tough it out." Even after all this stuff happened, I still didn't go in to get checked. But finally after 2-3 weeks of this and basically "rapidly dying," my wife begged me to go in to find out what was going on. They took my blood for some tests and within an hour the doc called saying my counts were insanely low and told me to go to the E.R. immediately (I even questioned the doctor over the phone "are you sure this is necessary?")
Found out if I didn't come in that day, I would have probably died within a few days. That night in the E.R. is when shit hit the fan; My pores were literally leaking blood as I had no platelets (blood cells that help clot your blood) and needed about 6 blood transfusions. So at 28 y/o, that's when I got the bomb dropped on me that I had Leukemia.
And thus began my interesting, humbling, and life-changing road to recovery.
Cancer can be tricky, especially when there are no inflammatory markers, which generally indicate the body is fighting something.
[rebelmouse-image 18358276 is_animated_gif=My stage 3b colon cancer was detected in 2008 during a colonoscopy. The tumor was in a polyp that was large enough to have existed for 10 years. It was my first colonoscopy at age 62. Before that, my doctor had specified fecal smears, which showed no problems. My regular blood tests had not shown any problems. I think they monitor for excess protein in the blood. I had 30 cm (11") of upper colon removed and underwent chemo for 6 months. I was in the hospital for about 5 days and outpatient during the chemo treatment. I lost a little of my hair; my hair is thick and I attribute that to my few native American genes. I have some loss of feeling in my fingers and feet from the chemo and my sleep clock if a bit off. I am a veteran so the VA paid for everything. My case was unique because I was symptom-free including having no protein markers in my blood. Because of this, my tissue sample was kept, with my permission, and my case was included in a study on non-inflammatory cancer. I have been cancer free for 7 years.
Carcinoid tumors grow very slowly, and most often originate in the digestive tract or lungs.
[rebelmouse-image 18358277 is_animated_gif=Kept getting pneumonia, like very frequently 2-3 times a year for about 3 years. Had many chest X-rays and CT scans that turned up nothing. Eventually, I had camera scope my lungs and found out I had a tumor blocking the bronchial tube to my upper left lobe. It caused bacteria to continually give me pneumonia because that portion of my lung was more or less partially collapsed and essentially doing nothing. Turns out it was a carcinoid tumor which I guess isn't technically cancer but its classified as it. Had a little more than half of my lung removed and my lymph nodes and now I feel great.
Never ever ever ignore gut issues.
[rebelmouse-image 18358278 is_animated_gif=I've had issues with my stomach and acid reflux for as long as I can remember. For 2 and a half years every month or so, I would get an excruciating stomach ache that felt like my entire abdomen was on fire followed by a day of feeling like I had gotten punched several times in the stomach or had done hundreds of sit-ups. A couple doctors would run tests, but never found much of anything. I've been scoped from both ends more times than I'd care to count. Finally, during a cat scan, or whatever it's called where they send you through the donut, they found my appendix was swollen. They rushed me over to surgery and took it out. It exploded after they had gotten it out, and the surgeon decided it didn't look right. So they did some labs and called me back in for a follow up before I had healed. They found that I had appendiceal carcinoma (sp?) and they had taken some images of "goo" that was strewn throughout my abdomen. What I was led to understand the was that was an early sign of it spreading, and due to what they had found in my appendix, I had to have another surgery. Unfortunately, they had to slice me open from my belly button down, before taking my secum (sp?) and six inches of my large intestine. They also took out most of my inwards and scrubbed the goo off. Took me a long time to recover, and left me with a bought of body dysmorphia that led to depression and unfortunately weight gain.
You're never too young to get cancer.
[rebelmouse-image 18358279 is_animated_gif=I'm 27, found a lump in my boob and went to my GP and a month later was having a mastectomy. I'm currently having chemo and on cycle 2/6.
So ladies, check them boobies cos age means nothing!
If it looks like a bite but doesn't go away...
[rebelmouse-image 18358280 is_animated_gif=Found a small red bite/spot on my back, felt itchy. Took a picture and kept an eye on it for a few weeks, it changed shape, and sort of collapsed into itself; turns out I had skin cancer, had it removed and have a check-up every 5 years.
Pancreatic cancer is one of the more difficult cancers to diagnose and treat. It killed Apple founder Steve Jobs in 2011.
[rebelmouse-image 18358281 is_animated_gif=My dad got diagnosed with pancreatic cancer three days ago. He has been feeling bad the last year, worse the last 6 months. He has been seeing a doctor from the start. Apparently, it's a bitch to notice.
What he has been suffering from is loose stool, dramatic weight loss (from 80kg to 55kg in a year) muscle loss, difficulties to walk due to muscle loss and pain in his neck.
Other symptoms of pancreatic cancer can be yellow skin, yellow eyes.
Just a warning to people who might experience these kinds of things, get it checked before it's too late... :(
Cancer often presents no symptoms, so pay attention to ANY abnormalities. This guy got lucky.
[rebelmouse-image 18358282 is_animated_gif=I didn't and that's the scary thing!
I was a fit and healthy 28-year-old guy, went to the gym three times a week, played and trained for football twice a week all whilst eating relatively healthy. Cancer wasn't really on my radar.
Fortunately one day in the shower I felt a slight lump but truthfully didn't think it was cancer. I google diagnosed a harness epidydmal cyst but thought I'd better get it checked out. I waited a while for an appointment and eventually got it checked out. Dr agreed with my diagnosis but offered me an ultrasound scan for peace of mind, I agreed
A few months later my scan comes around, there's me sitting there fully expecting the all clear ( I was still a healthy young and active guy still with no other worrying symptoms) then Wham! Sorry Mr. Tallyblade but you have testicular cancer, was not expecting that!
By chance, I'd caught it early which made the treatment a whole lot easier. Thankfully I've been all clear for three years and I'm now expecting the arrival of Tallyblade Jnr
Guys, check yourself before you wreck yo self
You can always rely on Mom to hold you accountable.
[rebelmouse-image 18358283 is_animated_gif=Not me, my stepbrother, he's 20 now but 19 at the time:
Was walking funny, kept having to hold on to things, was really out of breath walking from one side of the room to another. Acting generally dozy, eyesight had deteriorated quickly over a few months.
He also had the shakes - now this is the key symptom, as my stepmom has a neurological disorder triggered by too many anti-depressants, which has caused her to shake. She was panicking that she'd passed something on to him and forced him to go to the doctors. He wouldn't have gone otherwise, as he's been mothered to the point of being essentially 10 years old, he has absolutely no self-awareness.
CAT scan one day, 24 hours later called straight back into the hospital, had so much fluid in his brain that they needed to insert a stent that day. Found a brain tumor that had been causing it at the top of his spine. He went through two rounds of chemo and one of radiotherapy, wasn't sick, the only ill effects were losing his hair and feeling tired all the time. Now in remission, has almost been cancer-free for a year. The whole treatment lasted maybe 5 months? Good work on the doctors!
Things People Will Never Order At A Restaurant
Reddit user DGex asked: 'Reddit. What will you never order at a restaurant?'
Be it an old familiar, or a new establishment that has been the talk of the town, restaurant diners are always faced with a challenge once they are handed a menu.
Do they stick with what they know, and order the burger and fries or spaghetti and meatballs, which are both difficult to screw up?
Or do they get a little adventurous, and try the restaurant's specialité, even if it's something they've never tried before in their lives?
Generally speaking, it tends to be on a case-by-case basis based on the restaurant they are dining in.
Of course, some people have such an aversion to certain ingredients or dishes, that no matter the location, they will never order it.
"Reddit. What will you never order at a restaurant?"
Not What, But When...
"I'll never order 10 minutes before closing."- bearstrugglethunder
Speaking From Experience
"Ice in my drink."
"After decades in the industry, I've only ever seen one change the ice machine filters and clean the bin regularly."-Anna_Namoose
"I have almost twenty years of experience managing bars and restaurants."
"What do you think I won't get? "
"Stylish or not?"
"Ice."
"In everything."
"I can assure you that I have saw far more appalling ice machines in back of houses than immaculate ones."- Tricky_Routine138
ice waiting GIF by tarninabarnGiphyStay Consistent
"Anything outside of what their core business is."
"Not ordering fish at a steakhouse, a burger at a Mexican restaurant etc."- KinkyPTDoc
Why Pay For What You Can Make Yourself?
"Quesadilla."
"I'm not paying for tortillas and cheese."
"I always have that sh*t at home."- DGex
"Pasta."
"I can make it at home, I'm a decent cook and can make most pasta dishes at home."
'I eat out to have foods I can't make."
'I'm usually disappointed when I do order it."- bensmom2020
"Tuna fish sandwich."- Limp-Persimmon-5729
"A grilled cheese sandwich."
"There's just no way a restaurant can elevate it to make it worth the cost."- manderifffic
Hungry Grilled Cheese GIF by U by Kotex BrandGiphyCasear, Cobb, Waldorf...NOPE!
"Salad."
"It’s so cheap to buy the ingredients and most restaurant salad comes from a bag."
"It’s just dumb in 85% of the cases."- humancalculus
"$17+ salad."- Monowakari
Split It, Maybe?
"Oh, I've got a good one."
"Do not order the lasagna if you visit Brio Tucsan Grille."
"It's not awful, fantastic, or extraordinary; it's just normal."
"But why, you say, would you advise against eating a typical meal?"
"Considering that it contained 5200 calories. calories for two days."
"When I removed empty dishes from the table in front of guests, I would shudder."- KeyPersimmon445
If You Can't See The Sea, Maybe Avoid Seafood...
"In a location not known for its seafood, lobster."
"Where are they going to get lobster, anyway?"- WillingnessInner9666
"Rocky Mountain Oysters."- Rollin_Soul_O
Eight Is A Few Too Many Legs...
"Anything cephalopod."- FarewellMyQueen
Pbs Nature Sea GIF by Nature on PBSGiphyUnless They Pick The Leaves Themselves...
"Tea."
'Compared to how much it costs to make at home, it's stupidly overpriced at restaurants."- Pure_Block_5309
There's nothing wrong with being a picky eater.
That being said, it's always worth trying something new before deciding you don't like it.
Even if no one should blame you for refusing to order sushi at a pizza counter.
"Never dip your pen in the company ink."
An age-old cautionary saying urging people not to get romantically entangled with their coworkers.
Doing so used to be illegal at many companies, whereas now it's grown to become a bit more commonplace, and often results in some cases of wedded bliss and happily ever afters (as demonstrated by The Office's Jim and Pam.)
Of course, when entering a relationship with a coworker, be it a one night stand or a committed, multi-year relationship, there is always the risk that it might not end well, resulting in your being forced to see your ex every day at the office (Bridget Jones anyone?)
"People who slept with a coworker, what happened after?"
Well, That's A Success?
"We became friends and she donated a kidney to me lol."- Headbobby
As If Nothing Had Changed...
"Got married 2 years later."
"'Co-worker' can mean different things and different circumstances, for instance:"
"Our company had 130,000 employees world-wide."
"Our group was housed in a building with 1,000 employees."
"We were not in each other's chain of command."
"It could have been somewhat awkward if it did not work out, but not awful."
"It did work out."
"Later on, saved money by carpooling!"- SyntheticOne
The Office Laughing GIF by NBCGiphyJust Couldn't Fight The Chemistry
"We were both working as actors in a small film, cast as romantic leads."
"She noticed I got tense when we had to kiss... and suggested we go on a date to practice kissing."
"We played mini-golf and practiced kissing."
"Then we continued practicing in her car in the parking lot after the mini-golf place closed until a cop came to investigate."
"Then we got a hotel room and practiced other stuff."
'I guess I'm a slow learner because she's still giving me remedial lessons."- Jake_Science
Nothing Personal, One Hopes..
"She had to fire me."
"Poor performance."- bilvester
Consider Long Term Goals First
"Fun."
"Highly recommend if you have a job."
"Do not recommend if you have a career."- bluegiant85
Renee Zellweger Office GIF by Working TitleGiphyOn To Bigger And Better Things
"Dated discreetly and after four years we got engaged."
"We then both told our supervisors we were leaving in the summer."
"At our last meeting as they were doing their good bye lunch for both of us with about 30 coworkers, they had us say a few words."
"I went first and said I was moving to a new city."
"Then it was my fiancés turn and she said she was also moving to that city, with me, because we’re engaged."
"It was glorious."
"We are happily married for 13 years and have an awesome daughter."
"Life is goooood."- lmc227
Jealous Much?
"I had a supervisor that I really hit it off with and had great chemistry."
"As soon as they found out we were dating, she got fired and immediately found a better job."
"We've been married for almost 13 years now."
"I feel I should clarify a little bit while still keeping the details as vague as possible because quite a few people worked there."
"She was my boss in the sense that if she told me something needed taken care of, I was expected to take care of it."
"She didn't actually have the power to fire me if our relationship went south, but she probably could have gotten me fired if she had been that type of person."
"We worked there for two years before anything remotely physical happened."
"Our lunch breaks lined up."
"After a few conversations, we became friendly and started spending most of that hour shooting the sh*t with each other."
"I was crushing on her hard, but didn't think she'd be interested in dating one of the janitors, so I didn't say anything in an effort not to make things weird at work."
"One day I let it slip to one of the other janitors that I had a crush on her."
"He thought it would be hilarious to immediately go and tell her what I said."
"The next day, she asked me if I had really said that."
"I was really embarrassed but admitted that I had said it."
"She basically told me she was feeling the same way and gave me her number."
"11 months later, we were married."
"There were two guys in upper management that had asked her out and been rejected."
"Their egos obviously took a hit when they found out she chose me."
"She was fired after being blamed for someone else's mistake."
"Then they refused to show the proof that she was the one responsible."
"It was bullsh*t, but it only took her two weeks to find a job that paid a lot more."
"Once they did that to her, I immediately became a terrible employee and openly talked sh*t about everyone in management until they really had no choice but to fire me."- Imahorrible_person
Nothing Lost, Nothing Gained
"We did it a couple of times then both went on with our lives."
"It was just something we both wanted to do temporarily."
"Neither one of us wanted it to be serious or long-term, and so it wasn’t."- Listening_Heads
No Regrets Whatsoever
"We moved in together, got engaged, bought a house and had a baby."
"Don't let a job get in the way of your life."- AllSonicGames
Who'd Have Guessed...
"I slept with my boss back in 93."
"She instigated it."
"She’s sitting beside me."
"30 years later and two adult kids."
"Worked out!"
"I should add we did NOT care for each other at first. It was definitely not a case of 'will they, won’t they' but more of a 'will he quit or won’t he?'"
"Funny how life works."- Uncle_Bug_Music
Proceed With Caution
"Fun while it lasted, but very awkward after."- BrianH-84
Love cannot, and should not be denied, even if it is a coworker.
Anyone looking for a one and done, however, might want to look beyond the walls of your office.
Unless you like constantly being reminded of your past mistakes.
It can take a lot of courage to put yourself out there and let someone know you're interested.
As long as they're not creepy, aggressive, or crazy, it should be flattering, right?
If you're straight and a person of the same gender as you flirts with you, this should be easy to deal with.
In most cases, it took a lot more courage for them to ask than for you to hear.
The following question has been asked to many a straight guy over the years.
Let's see how the times and reactions have progressed.
Redditor FregeanCoder wanted the heteronormative gents out there to share with us, so they asked:
"Straight men, how would you react if a man hit on you?"
I've flirted with many a straight guy, and 99% of the time, it's all gone over well even if they turned me down.
Be Polite
buster keaton GIFGiphy"I've told them thank you but not interested."
twinturboboosted
"Pretty much this for me as well, no need to get scared, but at the same time I did have one super creep, not a comfortable experience."
Empty_Jellyfish_1995
Happy Endings
"My response was, 'I’m flattered, but it’s not my thing.' Guy insisted on buying me that drink anyway as an apology. Thirty years later, we’re still friends. I was best man at his wedding, and now they’re both like brothers to me."
ElectricTurtlez
"Wow, an 'apology' - for flattering you!? Maybe he felt that he made you uncomfortable. Sounds like a generous and humble person."
BoringBob84
"I wish men could do that when women reject them. For some reason, if a woman rejects a straight man he thinks 'being friends' is like a punishment."
Joygernaut
Aww Shucks
"My wife and I were at a gay bar with some friends and one time while alone a young man offered to buy me a drink… it was the most flattering feeling, which I of course told him as I politely declined. He must have been having a rough patch since he was very attractive and had no business hitting on a guy like me. Or maybe it was late and he was drunk."
corona-lime-us
"You could have been his type. Never know."
twinturboboosted
"Haha. Perhaps. I’ll cling to the possibility. I’m just grateful my wife agreed to marry me before I discovered IPA’s and how to smoke meat!!!"
corona-lime-us
Keeping it
"I had a man I thought was hitting on my girlfriend and telling us both multiple times he was into threesomes tell me in a forceful way at the end of the night was gay. I said ah, that's cool man good for you! He walked away looking kind of sad and defeated. It wasn't until the next day that we realized he was hitting on me and we all had a chuckle at my obliviousness."
Gettinrekt1
No Harm
"Well normally at first I’m polite and say no thanks in some way or straight out. If it ends there it’s amusing no harm done. But just like with women if they are overly aggressive after then it’s a lot different. Ashamed of how common that type of stuff is. It has nothing to do with people's sex life. People are capable of all kinds of things. We know this but seem to act like it doesn’t happen."
_Dirty_Deedz_
OHHHHHH!!!!
Seth Meyers Pain GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy"Probably the same way as when a woman hits on me - be oblivious to it until weeks later when it suddenly dawns on me."
Eccentric_Fixation
I always hate that A-HA moment.
Like, where was my mind at in the moment.
SEE MEEE!!!
Jim Carrey Flirting GIFGiphy"I'm gay, my oldest friend is straight. Took him to a gay bar once. He got very offended that no one tried to hit on him."
J8766557
Why not?
"I'm a straight, bearded, short but pretty muscular guy living in (very liberal) Berlin. Apparently, that's attractive for a lot of gay men so I'm getting hit on by men pretty regularly, a lot more than by women. I usually just tell them I'm not gay and then it depends on their reaction."
"Keep talking, do more drinking, keep dancing... Why not? I've been on the opposite side after a rejection by a woman and it's nice to just keep having a good time instead of an awkward exit that you'll cringe about 10 years later randomly."
Magnetobama
Back when we danced
"Not sure how it works nowadays with apps like Grindr but in the late 90s/2000s, we had a gay club in our city (no longer exists and there’s not another one unless you drive 30 min to a town over). Anyway, I was the straight friend in a group of gay guys because I loved EDM and I think by association, other gay men thought I was gay."
Always flattered, politely said no and they would turn to the next guy waiting in line for a drink and hit on them. Rinse and repeat. I think what I learned is that men regardless of sexual preference are all horny and will try again and again until they find someone down to clown."
irn
Thanks, Corey
"I was at a house party and he started hitting on me. I kind of panicked and said I was dating one of the girls at the party. Went over to her after and asked her to play along because he was hitting on me and I didn’t want to start a fuss. Ended up hooking up with her later that night and 16 years later were married with 2 kids. At our wedding speech, I thanked him even though he wasn’t there. Corey wherever you are, thanks bud."
reload88
Beautiful Hair
"Happened to me by a coworker. I very politely explained I wasn’t gay but it never changed my opinion of him. He eventually thanked me for dealing with it the way I did and I explained it wasn’t necessary to say thanks. I asked him why me though. He replied, 'You’ve got one hell of a head of beautiful hair!' And he was right."
Particular-Paper-558
Be Fair
Criminal Minds Fist Bump GIF by IONGiphy"I flirt a little but make sure he knows I'm straight and there is no opportunity for us to be anything but friends. Gay dudes are some of the best friends a straight guy can have and I don't give a f**k what anyone thinks about that. Just don't lead them on, it's not fair to them."
somedoofyouwontlike
Well it does sound like we've come a long way.
It's nice to know.
Let's flirt.
Whether we realize it or not, we have certain "tells" that will signal to other people what life is like at home, whether we're hard workers or parents or travelers.
Even single men, despite their age, have certain characteristics that can be spotted from a mile away.
Curious, Redditor hamsterdumpster asked:
"What screams 'single male lives here'?"
Questionable Decor
"Anything but a curtain acting as a curtain."
- Some-Nice-Basil
Minimalist By Nature
"When I first heard the description of a minimalist I was confused because as a single male, I had been living like that for years..."
- jnd_photography
A Glimpse into the Bathroom
"Three empty bottles of head and shoulders still in the shower, prob another bottle half full with tons of excess shampoo dried all around the outside."
"A small pile of leftover Irish spring soap bars maybe we can smash 'em together and make a full bar one day."
- Omnivore_Omri_23
Very Elaborate
"There's just a mattress on the floor in the bedroom."
- gambito705
Bottle Collections
"Empty liquor bottles lined up as decor."
- miranda_alexis
No Place for the Garbage
"There's no trash can in the bathroom."
- Iilsmokey
Key Characteristics
"Empty fridge except for a random beer and leftovers. White plastic chair. Everything black...black couch, black picture frames, black desk. Etc."
- elvishranger
Central TV
"A really big single-seat recliner in front of a massive TV with game consoles under it. Not that there's anything wrong with gaming, but there's a certain level of being committed to staying single when you have just one chair in your loungeroom, lol (laughing out loud)."
- Totallycasual
Shaving Day
"Stubble in the sink."
- Ok_Wave_7358
"And behind the sink faucets."
- Urrrsagrrl
National Pride
"A random flag hanging on the living room wall."
- bucktop
New Standard in Bedding Sets
"Using tee shirts as pillowcases. Lol (laughing out loud)."
- Ok-Mood9454
"Can confirm, have done this. They're about the same size and sometimes I can't (be bothered to) find a pillowcase."
- whyamionfireagain
Stereotypical Decor
"According to 90’s romcom/sitcoms: Lava lamp and a beanbag chair."
- sorentomaxx
"Can confirm: I love lava lamps."
- ithinkoutloudtoo
External Closet
"Speaking from experience. I got tired of having a floordrobe so I got an absolutely giant clothes drying rack where all of my clean clothes go."
- Bribase
"'This pile is clean, that pile is dirty.'"
- GSturges
"'...That pile is dirty but wearable.'"
- wageslave645
The Single Man Starter Pack
"Bare white walls or a s**tty poster on them... A large TV with no furniture other than a futon serving double duty as a bed... Beer everywhere, even on the ceiling."
- Barmacist
Enough Said
"All of the pizza boxes."
- somedream
"I called it the leaning tower of pizza."
- TheMohawkMan
While there's nothing wrong with being single, a guy should be mindful of what he keeps in his home, how he behaves, and even how his clothes appear, if he for some reason doesn't want to disclose to others that he's single or living alone.