"'Til death do us part" is a pretty long freaking time. So before people get hitched, they should probably, ya know, make sure that they're with the person they want to spend their life with. If that's not the case, it's usually pretty evident as early as the wedding day.
Fridayrules asked: Have you ever been at a wedding where it was obvious to you the couple was doomed? What happened?
50. Why even get married?
"I was at a wedding as a videographer. Bride was really happy and everything but the groom seemed disinterested and bored. Film the ceremony and everything and we need some shots of the guests mingling. My buddy says he hasn't got any footage of the groom and asks if I've seen him. I say no but offer to walk around and look.
I eventually find the groom way down by the lake sitting on a bench and chatting with one of the bridesmaids. They don't notice me, but I see them share a kiss. Mentioned it to my buddy who just shrugged and said we were there to film the wedding so it's not our concern."
49. Some people never change.
"They stayed together, but they HATE each other.
A friend from long ago called me up to be a groomsman. I was his friend back when we were in elementary school and hadn't thought about him in years, but okay. I get there and my friend has changed dramatically and for the worse. Or maybe it was that he hadn't changed. He was still that elementary school kid, only bitter. I figure I'll enjoy the party, see some old pals, and get through it. This isn't my trainwreck to stop.
The first time I saw my pal interact with his soon-to-be wife I knew there was gonna be problems. They swore at each other, in front of everyone, at their arranged parties. Not like "you're so hot" and stuff, but "you're a dumb b" kind of stuff.
I admit, I went to the wedding just to see what would happen.
They have 2 kids, they hate each other, and I have no idea why they stay with each other. Maybe they just both like being angry all the time?"
48. Sounds like a scumbag.
"My sister and her husband. They met each other our junior year of high school and she moved in with him half way through our senior year. I never liked him and did not hide that fact. I especially didn't like him after he hit on me while they were dating. Didn't hide that fact either, but my sister brushed me off.
Before he popped the question, she found out he'd been texting other girls. He promised he'd change.
The wedding was a train wreck, honestly. It was a small affair in our back yard, with her aunt officiating. The aunt started crying midway through the ceremony.
My step mother read a poem about them she wrote halfway through the ceremony (she always wants to be the center of attention), the grooms drunken father (who had been barred from the wedding) came stumbling in at some point during the vows to search for alcohol, and I saw the groom grab one of the brides maid's butt. I didn't point that out to my deliriously happy step-sister. I should have.
A year later it turned out the groom had been sexting my step mom.
My sister somehow forgave both of them. She has low self esteem.
They got caught again a year after that.
At that point my dad had divorced my step mother, so I have been distant from this whole shebang. But my sister (who I do still talk to) finally divorced that scum bag.
Divorce for everyone! Let's pull an Oprah."
47. That's one reason to get married...
"My sister-in-law's first wedding. Never really liked the groom from the first time I met him. After a year or so, he proposed. They started planning their wedding that was to take place in a year. But then, on whim, they get married in a civil ceremony with plans to still have the big ceremony later in the year. A few months after the civil ceremony, the groom goes in for heart surgery (bad valve he's had since he was born). The big ceremony finally comes except every major aspect of it has been stripped away.
Less than a year into the marriage, my sister-in-law brings me a credit card bill and asks me if she knows what this $600 charge her husband has on it. A little internet research and I find that he's tipping cam girls. They're officially divorced about a year after that.
In retrospect, it became obvious what had happened. My sister-in-law was grifted for a new heart valve. He didn't have the insurance at his job to cover the surgery, so he convinced her to marry him - earlier that expected - to get on her insurance, get the heart surgery, and then split."
46. YIKES.
"Got invited to a wedding of an ex girlfriend. There was one of those cheesy dollar dance things where bride and groom shake down the crowd for more money. Fine, I suck it up and dance with the ex for a fiver.
During the dance, she whispers "This should have been you". Freakout time. I left very quickly after that.
Needless to say, they didn't last."
45. Service Times.
"All of my interesting stories came from my time as an event server. Honestly, I felt like a lot of the weddings I saw at that event hall represented the culmination of two people's most expensive mistake of their lives. Coworkers and I routinely placed bets on which ones would last the year. Our manager even told us about one time when they called a couple to clear up some minor details regarding the wedding a few months prior, only to find that couple was no longer married.
I have to say, though, that the best (worst? take your pick) MOH speech I have ever heard was the one where the MOH had formerly dated the groom.
And she said this. In the speech.
And she also mentioned that it hadn't worked out between them for a laundry list of reasons, which unfortunately for my nightly entertainment she did not delve into.
AND then she threw in a few wink-wink nudge-nudge comments about the groom's sexual performance.
The bride looked furious the whole time this speech was happening, and made a beeline for the bar as soon as it was socially acceptable (can ya blame her?)
The groom, meanwhile, is super awkwardly (suspiciously?) avoiding eye contact with the MOH/his former lover, and the last thing I witnessed between the happy couple was a tense exchange interspersed with both of them chugging their drinks.
Yeah, I wouldn't place any bets on that one."
44. Red flags everywhere.
"I was a bridesmaid in my brother's wedding a few years back. The bride was okay throughout their relationship, but it felt very superficial, and she had done small things that signaled that she wasn't a very kind person - like refusing to take an obviously suffering pet cat to the vet because "it's just a cat". She had the money, she just didn't care at all. My brother did it for her in the end and wound up keeping the cat, but back to the story.
Leading up to the wedding, she got snippier, which we all brushed off as nerves, but she was being straight mean to her other SIL, who was literally doing everything. SIL planned the bachelorette party exactly as my bro's wife wanted - bro's wife pouts because we were talking to each other as well as her and just stands up and leaves. Just friggin leaves. Other SIL is clearly very hurt, and we did our best to cheer her up, but she had to share an awkward hotel room with bro's wife, so yay.
The rehearsal comes, and bro's wife sends SIL out to do all the last minute errands that bro's wife was supposed to do, but didn't because she's decided it wasn't her job but didn't tell anyone. So flowers, decorations, tons of stuff was missing and SIL was blitzing to retrieve it. We didn't know until bro's wife both bragged about what she did, and then about how SIL was late, useless, etc. I told her SIL was doing everything for her, she should be grateful, and then left while she was screeching.
Day of the wedding, she's miserable, barely smiles, yells at everyone for everything, refuses to dance at the reception beyond the first dance because she wanted to pout over unknown reasons, tears open the gifts to see who was cheap and who was worthy, and then flounced out while leaving trash everywhere.
I don't know how, but she and my brother remained married for about 5 years. She was just nasty the whole time. My brother is also a turd, but damn, she really went all out to out-turd him.
So she's gone, and we're all much happier without her. Still keep in touch with her brother and his wife (other SIL) though, because they're great folks."
43. A happy ending, at least.
"My best mate and his girlfriend. They were from polar opposite sides of the world with the bride some 10,000 miles from home. They were both located in a country that was not where they were born, they did not speak the language and they both were under immense strain. The Bride had other issues too that I won't share but that exacerbated the situation
The wedding was a small and simple affair - a registry office and a pub lunch, followed by a few beers by just very close family and a couple of friends. I was taking photographs.
The bride's mood was annoyed at best describe it - her new husband would put his arm around her and she would push him away. She stated to me she just did not want to be there. More than once she just stared at me in total despair. As a result he looked despondent at times and almost heartbroken. I didn't think they would see the year out.
15 years later they are still very much together, very much a team and happy. They worked it all out, they learned from each other and they stuck to it. And for me, I couldn't be happier for them."
42. WTF is a "running muscle"?
"I was the guest of the bride who was a coworker and we also were running partners. I was at the hotel bar the night before the wedding and the groom drunkenly touched my leg to feel my "running muscles."
They didn't even last two years."
41. Love Weed.
Well, it wasn't so much only the wedding (though I was best man at it), it was obvious the whole relationship was doomed when I learned this:
(Important to note, the groom was a hardcore stoner)
- She demanded before they got married that he quit smoking weed -- she was strenuously anti-drug.
- He had no intention of doing so, but was convinced he could hide it from her (so starting out with a lie, and one that was bound to be found out)
- He was horrible at hiding it when he was stoned.
They were divorced 9 months later after she caught him smoking in his car in the driveway. So stupid, the whole thing. Why people get into these relationships I have no idea. Iwanttheknife
40. "Once More with Feeling."
Instead of saying "I do", he said "Eh... I guess..."
It didn't last two years. khalamar
My dad said, "I'll try". Over 30 years together at this point. PM_ME_RHYMES
39. Swatting a fly?
There's a clip of a wedding (I think in Eastern Europe somewhere) where the bride playfully move the cake away from her husbands mouth and he loses it and slaps her in front of everyone.
I hope she got that annulled immediately. TGND03
38. All Bets.
My friend's. 12 people literally sat at a table at the reception and formed a pool for how long it would last. Shortest guess was 1 month, longest was 2 years. I had 15 months.
The divorce was announced at 2 years, 1 month later. We decided all bets were off. picksandchooses
37. Guilty!
The bride ugly cried the entire reception until her, the groom and her mom got into a yelling fight about it. They both made it clear the only reason they got married was because she was pregnant with their second child. The best man (of a different race, it's relevant...) seemed very jumpy the entire time... fast forward to 6 months later, and the baby is clearly biracial.
Less than a year after the wedding, bride & groom are divorced and she's with the best man.
Edit to add: I feel like I should add that the groom was not unhappy to get a divorce. General consensus was he was probably as guilty as she was, she just had the misfortune that her infidelity was a lot more obvious. thethowawayduck
36. Not a Chance.
Went to a wedding where the groom accidentally spilled champagne on the brides dress. Now she's probably not the only bridezilla out there who would go nuts. But this turned nasty in a matter of seconds. It started with her being irritated over the dress, to blaming him for everything wrong with the wedding (which no one noticed), issues with his family followed and to top it all off she questioned his mental health (he'd had problems in the past). All this while screaming at the top of her lungs in front off about 150 people. Poor guy never stood a chance. Queenofwands78
35. The Soundtrack.
The couple came to see me by appointment to choose wedding music for their ceremony.
There, in the church choir loft, they got into a heated argument over each piece of music under consideration. From the wedding processional to the recessional, there was zero agreement or willingness to compromise with each other.
To try to bring some harmony, I suggested that the bride choose the organ processional and the groom select the recessional, even though they strongly disagreed with each other - same with other music for the occasion. That worked for the moment.
In less than 6 months, the pastor informed me that the couple was back to see him for counseling, with divorce under consideration. Back2Bach
34. We Loved YOU....
My college girlfriend decided to marry her back-home-HS boyfriend. Fine, whatever. She invites me to the wedding. Fine, whatever. I go to the wedding, and her father, very loudly at the reception, pounds me on the back and announces, "THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN YOU UP THERE!"
They were married for 23 or so years. Then he divorces her, and she switches teams. dramboxf
33. The Creeper.
My wife and I had thought this one couple wouldn't last. The groom gave off a creepy vibe. We gave them 2 years max.
Two years came and they were expecting a baby, so we gave them another few years. Few more years came and another child was on the way. Then about a year later the crap hit the fan.
Our initial thoughts were correct - dude was creepy and hiding some sketchy stuff from his past. Lied about a lot of things, like his education.
This explains why he always worked the lowest position in their line of work (they both work in the medical field). He claimed he had a degree, which would put him at a much better paying position, but he kept working the bottom tier (practically volunteer) job. Money was a huge issue for them, and she made the bulk of their combined income. Arch27
32. Age Limits.
My Father-In-Law was getting remarried in his late 60's. His wife died 20 years earlier to cancer, she was married 3 times prior, twice divorce, once to death. When we met the new girlfriend at the time, 2/3 of the children told him point blank that she wasn't a good match for dad. Of course, he couldn't (didn't want to) see it.
(And took out a loan of $20,000 to repair her house) The thing is, he's super stubborn, as in he is clearly in the wrong with evidence supported, and he will still argue it 20 mins. And he's a yeller (If I raise my voice, then I'm more right!). She is also stubborn and extremely religious. (He is also religious, but she took it to an 11).
Any time they would get together while my wife and I were there, there was always a screaming match going on. They would find the littlest thing and start going off at each other. Well it never did get better. Weeks leading up to the wedding just added more fuel as they had more things to shout about.
The day of the wedding it felt really tense. Very smiling through their teeth. They hardly came back from their honeymoon when he approached my wife and I asking for advice. She served the divorce papers 2 months later, and he's still doing payments on her roof! Celestial_Scythe
31. Mistakes.
At my cousin's wedding, she came to hang out in my brother's and my hotel room to hangout because apparently her new husband just sat down in the honeymoon suite, put his face in his hands and said something along the lines of, "I made a mistake." They stayed together for five years, had two kids, and a very angry divorce. BagelsAreStaleDonuts
30. They'll be another....
Yes, he proposed drunk and she took it seriously. He clearly wished he could take it back. Big wedding they couldn't afford, he was nervous AF everyone there was dressed like it was a bbq, and were all there to get drunk. As soon as they were married they both had a smoke and a VB in each hand. Classy. Gave it 2 years. Boom to the day they were divorced, she found another dude and wore the same dress to her next wedding. Bogan AF. BDR529-7
29. Storyteller.
Yes. A coworker. She was constantly telling us stories that made it clear that the guy she was marrying was emotionally and verbally abusive. She would dread him coming to pick her up. I'm not the only one who told her not to go through with it.
Sadly, it sounded like her father was also really emotionally abusive and critical so she'd grown up with that kind of behavior being normalized. They are thankfully divorced now. It was pretty ugly but she seems a lot happier. Toomuchcustard
28. The 50 Mile Radius.
Yes. And unfortunately she was my best friend from high school/college, and I was the maid of honor. Everybody in a 50-mile radius could see that, while they were both nice people, they weren't right for each other. But he loved her, and I got the impression she just kinda wanted a wedding.
She filed for divorce 10 months later. She and I eventually drifted apart when my husband and I moved out of state. SaveBandit0215
27. Not Cute..
They wrote their own vows.
His were touching and endearing, about how his life was complete now that he was together with her.
Hers were a bunch of passive-aggressive, sexist attempts at jokes. "I promise to never let you win an argument. I promise to never let you watch a football game in peace. I promise to leave the bathroom a mess and yell at you about the toilet seat." Oudeis16
26. Too Good to be True.
My cousin and her husband had a pretty lavish wedding, one that seems like it should have been out of their price range. Husbands grandparents are wealthy so the assumption was that they had paid for it. Well couple months go by and on Facebook they are posting about their new Maserati they bought. My cousin is a college student, and her husband is in "sales."
After that they bought a brand new Mercedes and a yacht. Well turns out they had been running a Ponzi scheme and had defrauded people out of more than a million dollars. After they got caught they turned on each other. Husband got 9 years in federal prison, and my cousin got 2 years. Oh and she gave birth to their child in prison. Both of them are disgusting human beings so I'd hoped for more time in jail. Skate3158
25. The Right Girl.
Was friends with a girl, she's bit dramatic, emotional, severe enough that I wouldn't want to date her, but not that bad that I wouldn't be friends with her.
She introduces me to new boyfriend. Chill dude, into gaming like I am, becomes part of our group of gamers and we have frequent lan parties together.
She's always yelling at him about everything, emotional manipulations, yelling at him in front of the group of friends, but he sticks around, I have no idea why.
Tells me in confidence the one day that he sees her as the 'right now girl', not the 'right girl' and will be moving along shortly.
Then out of the blue they announce their engagement. wtf? but, i thought... whatever Married and divorced a year later.
He's now married to an awesome woman, been together around 10 years now, 1 cute daughter. Their first date was my wedding :) Reapr
24. Walk Away.
Brother wedding, told him he could walk away, he didn't, weren't married long. Best man at his next wedding he asked me if I were going to tell him he could walk away, I said no this is the one. Been together a long time and married quite a few years. Fean2616
23. I saw this on Dateline.
The groom's family hated the bride so much that they refused to allow her and her family at the reception. So there was a wedding, then two separate receptions. Amazingly, the marriage lasted a decade.
They HATED her. Had her committed, took her daughter away, tried to murder her. Literally MURDER her. Joke's on them, their precious baby boy ended up in prison for assault. He's now a registered sex offender who can't see his own daughter. She has the daughter and they're doing well now, thanks to her amazing mom. Jenny010137
22. I Do.
The bride got totally drunk, she sexily danced on the dance floor solo instead of her first dance, turned the wedding DJ into a Karaoke, started a fight with the best man's girlfriend. At the end of the night Then she had to be carried to her room because she was that drunk..... we've been happily married for 15 years now, so turns out I was wrong. megabollockchops
21. 364 days Counts.
My brother's wedding. I was up front with my parental units and I saw the bride walking down. She didn't have a smile on her face. I turned to my mother and said this marriage isn't lasting a year. She smacked me in the shoulder and gave me a scowl. Marriage didn't last a year. bricosis
20. Forget Scum.
My BFF's wedding, sad to say. She and her husband never smiled throughout the entire ceremony. The officiator kept saying how they looked like such serious a couple; not how cute or charming, but serious.
Two months later, she calls to tell me her husband was cheating on her, spent their wedding money on other women, and were being evicted from their home because he was spending his paycheck on himself and his extra-marital affairs. She is now happily divorced and moving on from her scumbag of an ex husband. Latter-Day_Gamer1540
19. Bad Chats.
Yeah, former friend got married to his partner of over 6 years, but he was always chatting up other girls online both before and after the wedding. He eventually got fired from a job for sexual harassment. He didn't tell her for a while and she dumped him soon after. He was living at her parent's place. kingochaos
18. Refunds?
I see a lot of posts here of people claiming the wedding was doomed because the couple got divorced, but I doubt they knew that at the time.
I had a wedding invitation that I refused to accept because of this. It was for a high school friend. I knew he had slept with all of the bridesmaids at some point or another. I knew she was constantly cheating as well. There was no way it would be stable.
So, I claimed I couldn't get away from my family, and sent a modest gift. According to another friend who attended, there was a fight at the wedding reception. The couple ended up annulling or divorcing soon after.
I never got the gift back though. Reddit
17. Revelations....
I thought they were doomed alright, but not in they way you're thinking. By their request the priest quoted Revelations because they were hardcore rapture believers. If you want to know what part of Revelations is appropriate for a wedding, the answer would be none of it. Anywho they joined a cult in the Rockies and disappeared up in the Yukon. Patches67
16. Deployed.
The guy was in the military and was being deployed overseas the day after the wedding, so they made an effort to make the wedding extra big and exciting.
He was gone for like 7 months or something and they got divorced the week he came back. velour_manure
15. Oh Queen...
Yep. My cousin got married to this guy she'd been dating for a year or so. They had a fairytale wedding at a plantation in Louisiana, gorgeous wedding. I turn and look at my mom and say "they aren't going to make it." She asks me what made me think that, to which I replied "I know for a fact he's gay."
He used to help out at band camp when I was in high school and he was very clearly gay, but closeted. He was his most comfortable self when he was hanging out with the dance instructor and they were openly gay.
Turns out I was right, they split up like 2 years later because he finally came out to my cousin as gay and wanted to live his best life. MommaGoinNuTz
14. Oh the Snark.
My brother's wedding. Prior, I hadn't seen my brother in years and he was getting married. Sent me a week notice to appear at his wedding. His soon-to-be wife was a bit odd. Really shy, quiet, and had ultra-conservative parents who you could tell didn't agree with the wedding because she should've of married a Christian white man and not an Atheist asian man.
They always had a snarky comment to me or my mom that we looked like savages. My brother is on the weird side as well. Super frugal, but also super wealthy. I gave it 2 years. They were married for 5 years, and she filed for divorce and ran off with another woman. Cut contact with her family and everything to be a lesbian. Fast forward to this year, and my brother finally opens up about the marriage saying that they never fought about anything, no arguments, no disagreements about money, children, future, etc. He assumed she was a closeted lesbian and wanted to be free from her family. Jiggly_Love
13. The BF Story....
I was the best man at my then best friend;s wedding. I knew he would blow even though he swore he was done with other women. Marriage lasted for nearly three years. His ex is doing really fine. He is still the old whiny lying and failing dude. Doesn't care much about his son too. Bavarian36
12. For the Money.
She (a morbidly obese "Live, laugh, love" fan) had a lit cigarette during the vows, berated the groom when he stumbled over the words, and had a face like thunder the whole time.
He (a mentally challenged pub glass collector) later admitted to being pressured into the whole thing by her.
The best man made a joke about her only marrying him for the money (despite his job he's LOADED, I think from an inheritance), and he developed a look that clearly said "oh crap, that's right, I've been played."
Divorced in a week, marriage unconsumated. She accused him of assaulting her, despite previously confirming the lack of sex.
Yeah... Aurell1an
11. Listen to Your Heart.
At my first wedding, I couldn't stop sobbing. It was weird. I thought it was because I was emotional, but I realize now that it was my body screaming at me saying, "DUDE STOP." We were stuck together for 10 years. BruceLee1255
10. The Hard Worker.
My cousin's, ten years ago.
They married after their firstborn son turned 1.
She didn't like my family and did everything she could to make her parents to be the favorite grandma and grandpa.
The last decade, they got two more children and built two houses, my cousin worked his butt off for as a firefighter and a plumber simultaneously.
Now that she achieved everything she wanted, she sew him off and is trying steps to get the houses and the kids. Luckily we're in Germany and the houses are legally his, as he solely paid for them. Chances are that he will end up with the houses but has to pay for his soon to be ex-wife. His intentions are to legally give one house to his kids and allow the mother to live there with them, leaving him only to pay a small amount of child support. realultralord
9. Oof....
Pagan ceremony, bride in fairy wings. Groom begins his vows with 'We were both with other people when we met.' Bride begins hers with 'As most of us know, I'm not mentally well.'
Oof, just... Oof. StrangePondWoman
8. Family Feud.
Oh yeah, my cousin got married to some fool nobody in the family liked. I'm not sure I ever said one word to this guy. But fancy wedding with a lot of people, they divorced one month later. She did eventually marry a very nice guy the entire family likes so it does have a happy ending. BurghFinsFan
7. The Family.
My uncle got married and they had an on and off relationship ( they couldn't afford divorce) until my uncle got the crap beat out of him by her family. borny106
6. Too Young.
My stepbrother married is now ex-wife way too young. Besides the fact the wedding was dry due her not being 21 at the time (she was 20 he was 21) she was just not a nice person. She rejected us every time we tried to be kind to her. They would always leave family gatherings early. There was a ton of family drama the day of the wedding about seating (so dumb) and the pastor almost didn't marry them because he thought they weren't ready.
I was in the wedding party and when I was standing up there I just had that feeling "this isn't going to work." After 6 years of her changing jobs, relocating for those jobs, and dragging my stepbrother along they got divorced. He had to transfer nursing schools 3 times because of all the moving around. My stepbrother gave and gave and she just took and took. spenceballs
5. Hey Mr. DJ?
I was a DJ years ago, and I had a Friday night gig to do a wedding reception. They had hired a band, too, and I played music between the band's sets.
Well, the groom got rip-roaring crapfaced drunk and passed out at the head table. I'm playing the tunes while everybody danced the night away. Except the bride is nowhere to be seen. She was the only one in a sparkling white dress, so normally you couldn't miss her.
Ten minutes later, I see her sneaking out from behind the backstage curtain, and rushing off into the bathroom. Half a minute later, the singer of the band also creeps out. He's grinning like the fox who ate the canary. He strolls up to me and basically starts bragging about how she was pretty tight for a woman with three kids. All I could do was shake my head. thudly
4. The Day Arrives....
Backyard wedding between two missionaries. I got to the house for the rehearsal dinner the night before to hear screaming and crying as the pastor tried to calm each of them down long enough to get them to agree to move forward with the wedding the next day. Day of the wedding, the wedding party (including me) were told we were the ones responsible for setting to the tables, making centerpieces, and doing signage 4 hours before the wedding while bride is still distraught.
Oh, also, self service bar plus lots of kids meant lots of drunk kids whose parents weren't watching as they drank Long Island ice teas straight out of the dispensers. This culminated in the drunk two year old flower girl faceplanting off a trampoline conveniently placed on a concrete driveway and having to be rushed to the emergency room covered in blood during the speeches.
They moved out of state just after their wedding and I've only spoken to them a couple times, she has become something of a hermit and he's gotten very into his job so I'm guessing they don't talk much either. Stellaheystella
3. $50 for all....
Wedding was at some white trash event hall. When the reception was wrapping up, the bride's family began to pick up the chairs around each table (I later learned that they refused to pay the $50 pickup fee so they were picking up themselves). No one from the groom's family were helping pick up the chairs and the bride's family did not like that at all.
The chaos started with smart comments from the bride's family and quickly escalated into a full-out brawl ending with the bride and groom being rushed into their getaway car like they were Bonnie and Clyde. They were divorced a year later. felton225
2. Don't be Late....
Relatives wedding.
Bride was 45 minutes late to ceremony. Bride parents (who was separated due to the dad having an affair with the mums best friend, who he later married) fought throughout the whole day. Father of the bride speech was all about him, the groom didn't even write one, and stood for 15 minutes babbling about anything he could think of. Step mother of the bride through a hissy fit that the wedding dress got dirty she was planning to resell it.
The Groom then proceeded to drink 3 bottles of Jack Daniel's and hijacked the bands drum kit and play a 20 minute drum solo. He spent the rest of the evening in the recovery position.
Marriage didn't last two years, can't divulge why as the Criminal case is still ongoing. clclark1992
1. Are you even thinking?
Oh yes. There was a palpable emotional disconnect between bride and groom. She seemed completely void of emotion. He got drunk at the reception, missed the cutting of the cake and was carried to their hotel room upstairs. Marriage lasted just over two years. She got them into enormous debt via credit cards buying everything she saw. He spent most of his off time surfing and no interest in spending time with her. They had zero in common. Still cannot figure out what they were thinking. justusethatname
Sometimes you only need to experience something once, to know it's a never again situation.
I always say, try everything once.
Well, now that I'm older, a caveat to that is... try it all within reason.
How many things have we all walked away from saying the one time experience will suffice?
In fact, knowing when to say no is one of life's wisest choices.
Redditor Croakied wanted to discuss the times we've all said... "once was enough!" They asked:
"What is one thing that you will NEVER do again?"
Love. Did it. A few times. Moving on.
Stay Still
"Jump off a moving train."
DenseDriver6477
"My dad used to jump on a train when he was little to go to school. He broke his nose like twice doing it. He also would not recommend."
Darphon
“vaportini”
"Smoke alcohol. Me and my friends bought something called a 'vaportini' in college where you could pour alcohol into a bulb and after low heat separated the alcohol from the liquid, you could inhale it thru the glass straw you inserted into the bulb. Basically you got drunk directly into your bloodstream/brain and it never hit your stomach."
"If you did too much, your body wouldn’t make you vomit or something, there wouldn’t be a simple self regulation/safety measure. You’d just get alcohol poisoning. Felt very dangerous, the drunk wasn’t a regular drunk feeling. We used it once and were like okay, never again. I’d be surprised if you could still buy it, although it would be incredibly easy to replicate at home."
michelangelho
It’s heartbreaking...
"Fall in love with a drug addict."
Rains_Lee
"Good call, don’t do it. The drugs will always come first. Can’t go out unless their 'ok' with how much drugs they have and money left over if any, cant make love unless they have their fix for the night and even still it never feels normal, can’t trust them after the lies to get drugs and the manipulation they put you through, and you can’t change them no matter how much you try and wish they would. It’s heartbreaking."
Cvilla411
More me time...
"Give up my life for work. F**k going the extra mile for a place that doesn't value you and pays you crap even though you go the extra mile for them. You have 1 life with only so much precious time to enjoy it and slaving away at some job is not worth it. Do what you can to reduce your workload and find better employment, or hell try to change the working conditions at your current job to improve things for everyone if you can."
Mrhappytrigers
Well Obvi...
"Donate a kidney."
ToffieMonster
"Well, you could donate the remaining one. You just won’t be around to say anything about it."
shavemejesus
This is definitely list I can relate to. No thank you on a lot of this!
I Quit
"Smoke cigarettes, it's been two years since I quit."
SuvenPan
Forget It
"Climb mount Kilimanjaro. Toughest thing I've done and it's not worth it. I'm all about tough treks and camping but to put yourself under tough conditions and suspectable to altitude sickness only to get to the top for 10 minutes for a picture. No thank you."
Monks_
"I agree, it was memorable. Once was enough for my husband and I. Thankfully we stayed at American style hotel run by the US Navy with a hot tub and bar. Alcohol was definitely needed after all that."
Whatsherface112
I'm living alone!
"Sign a lease with a stranger without hanging out with them a few times beforehand. My past roommate experiences in college were terrible. Roommates either ignored me, hosted parties til 3 AM on weeknights, made the house the hangout and drug-den for them and their buddies. Meet up once and they'll put on an act for you. If you can, try to see how they act drunk or frustrated."
"Try to hang out with their buddies too so you can see the type of people who could be coming into your future place of residence. As soon as I can afford it, I'm living alone! Now, I investigate a potential roommate's social media and hang out at least twice before signing a lease with them."
fleursdefer
Stay Away
"Take back a cheater. Know your worth my brothers and sisters."
santichrist
"Ughhhhh going back and forth on this one. My boyfriend of 5 years has cheated on me. Several times, actually but says he’s really changed and is ready to settle down and wants me to move in with him. I’m on the fence. So they never change???"
madlecroy
Sleeptime
"Take a laxative and sleeping pill at the same time."
karmaredemption
Once, twice, three times... I'm out. Bye.
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People Imagine How They'd React If Their Significant Other Wanted To Sleep With Other People
There is an age old question that has been getting more traction surrounding sex for partners the last decade or so.
And that is... "is just one enough?"
Were we really meant to only be with one person forever?
There are so many flavors to taste.
What if your partner wants more cookie dough with your strawberry?
Redditor Pineapple-Status wanted to hear everyone's thoughts on opening the bedroom to others. They asked:
"What would you do if your long term SO suddenly wants to have sex with other people?"
I say I'd be ok with it, but I'm remembering my last relationship and I feel like I'm not a "put my $ where my mouth is type" on this issue.
Bye
"Wish her well and spend the next 2 years getting myself back to a place where I am ready to get hurt again."
wickedblight
It's Time to Roll On...
"Personally I would leave them."
"I think they're the ones leaving you. I don't think the relationship changes at that point; I think it ends. If you have a monogamous relationship, they are telling you they want to end that. They might be suggesting starting a new, non-monogamous relationship, but that is a separate thing. The original relationship is over."
octopoddle
ethical non-monogamy...
"OP, it's no different than anything else they want: you either agree and stay together, disagree but stay together, disagree and break up, or even agree and break up. What you're talking about is called 'ethical non-monogamy.'" The seminal book to read is called The Ethical Sl*t."
"It basically boils down to be whatever you want, just don't lie about it. The tricky thing is that this is something that was not present before, but is present now. So it's a potential fork in your road. If you're against it, it's up to your SO to decide if sex with other people is more important to them than a life with you."
Tokugawa
a different story...
"I think it depends too how intently they're interested. If it's a thing they bring up because they're curious but it's not a dealbreaker for them, I'm fine with that even if I don't want to proceed. A solid relationship involves open communication, and it'd make me happy if my partner trusted us and our bond enough to voice that curiosity with me."
"If it's something their heart's absolutely set on, then it's a different story. Either way, it's kind of strange to me how these posts always assume simply asking your partner how they feel about opening the relationship means they're now wholey invested in the poly lifestyle and they'll resent you or cheat if you say no."
donkeynique
Others
"Happy that we have common interest, sad that it's different 'other people."
i_lick_icicles
Sex is always an issue. Remember when it was just fun?
Mine
"Leave her. I’m far too possessive and jealous to be able to mentally accept polyamory. If she has a desire to be with other people I’m not going to stand in her way but I’m not going to be there when she gets home either."
Thiek
Not Me...
"Break up. My parents were poly and it's just not for me. I've been honest with every relationship I've been in that I'm not interested in any type of open relationship. If they want to be with someone else that's fine but we'll be over. My husband is aware of this and on board (and has been for over twenty years!). So if he came to me with this yes I would be heartbroken but I'm not willing to budge on this and it would be the end of our relationship."
GoldDustWitchQueen
Let's Talk
"Counseling time! We're married. I'm chronically ill (stage 4 breast cancer) and have no libido. We try to make intimacy work, and obviously in that case it wouldn't be working. So. Time for a pro to sort out the marriage, and possibly a sex therapist for me."
insertcaffeine
Awkward Positions
"I’ll put myself hypothetically in this position. My partner and I only want each other. We’ve made this abundantly clear to each other. However, if she came to me with desire to open our bedroom and she wanted to sleep with people outside our marriage."
"I would simply express how I vehemently do not an open bedroom and that it would kill any desire I have to want her, be with her, love her, etc. Our couple dynamic has been working well through our ups and downs. Involving some stranger in the ONE thing I find most sacred with my partner is the best way for me to lose any interest or passion for the relationship."
RedFlaim
Farewell
"Break it off, because they definitely already have someone in mind and you telling them no won't change the fact that they were only one step away from following through with it."
Caressticles
Well it feels like a lot of people still believe in one partner, happily ever after. Good for y'all. But big props to these couples who have open and honest conversations about their wants and needs.
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Many of us sometimes fantasize about what we would do to our worst enemies, especially in the moments when they're actively making our lives worse.
While most of us would never actually do any of the things that we contemplate instead of screaming at that super annoying person at the office, we do get pretty creative with the ideas.
Redditor take_me_there_ asked:
"What WOULD you wish on your worst enemy?"
This One Would Hurt
"A conscience. Let her realize the horrific things she’s done."
- Jenny010137
"Seriously. Introspection, self awareness, and empathy are traits that would improve a lot of sh*tty people."
- el_muerte17
"Oh I wish I had thought of this one. If my enemy had a conscience, wow life would be much different."
- Shelbysouth43
No Pearly Whites For You
"I’d like all their teeth to turn really yellow and stay yellow no matter what they do."
- toothfixingfiend
"What did I ever do to you?"
- Spideredd
"I don't even know you! Give me back my enamel!"
- AngryMustache9
Everything You Own Is Orange Now
"Permanent Cheeto fingers. Just orange cheese dust getting on everything."
- cocoapuff1721
"This has to be one of the most evil things I ever heard, yet absolutely hilarious."
-Merk0411
"The Midas Touch: Snack Edition"
- MaryVenetia
Ouch, But Forever
"Stubbing and breaking their toe and right as it’s about to be done healing it happens again over and over for the rest of their pitiful time on this hell we call earth."
- No-Bee-2971
"Sisyphoot"
- Alpha_6
"More of a Toemetheus imo"
- PykeTheDrowned
Self Reflection
"For them to realize how big of an a-hole they are."
- mayhemanaged
"Same for me. The trouble is mine probably knows what a tremendous a-hole he is, and just doesn't care (it's what defines him, is his outlook more than likely), so, give mine a conscience as well, he undeniably lacks one."
- RhoadsOfRock
"a crushing moment of self realization is something that can destroy you mentally. I wish that on them."
- chancetodream
Bury Them Under A Mountain Of Minor Inconveniences
"Always being hungry two hours after eating no matter how large the meal. Slow internet. Traffic jams no matter the location. Self doubt. Allergies. Favorite shows spoiled."
"Nothing major enough to be life altering but constant, low grade inconveniences that wear on your soul every day."
- I_Love_Small_Br**sts
"Every bite of food they eat/drink they drink being slightly the wrong temperature."
"Coffee? Warm but not hot. Cola? Cool, but not cold. Muffin? Ever so slightly frozen."
"Not enough to ruin their life, but just enough to not quite have full enjoyment of anything.."
- HappiHappiHappi
They'll Never Be Able To Use Their Computer Again
"Quick scan with McAfee on their computer."
- halflife_3
"You f**king monster."
- Orion_2kTC
"The constant pop-ups from McAfee is too far."
- _Land_Rover_Series_3
That's A New Level Of Evil
"Bed bugs."
- thrawn1825
"Currently dealing with bed bugs, and I can absolutely confirm this is the kind of thing I would wish upon my worst enemy. It is miserable and painful, and I've tried everything to get rid of them at this point."
"I would easily wish this upon my worst enemy, x10."
- ArbitrarilyStagnant
"Oh hell no, you went there... Hopefully they aren't living in an apartment complex or you've cursed everyone in the building."
- expect_less
Well of course I know him. He’s me.
"$100,000. I sure could use it."
- Sparklesperson
"'It’s no surprise to me I am my own worst enemy'"
- FishyVonFishenHymer
"Lol I thought this was that deep sh*t like 'pray for those you resent to have all the things you want in life….' Then I realized."
- No-Chipmunk9527
Forever Constipated
"That they can never have a satisfying poop. They always feel like they have to go to the bathroom and when they do nothing comes."
- [User Deleted]
"Wow. That's evil. Always feeling the need to pee would be good (as in horrific) too."
- ipakookapi
We definitely don't recommend implementing any of these plans (not that most would actually be possible), but here's some new ideas for the next time you're stuck in a meeting with your most annoying coworker and need a little fantastical escape.
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I grew up poor, and I remember the little things that made me smile when we just happened to have enough that week.
The little things that a truly rich person would not think twice about.
Ah, the luxury of it.
What spells luxury for you?
Redditor ConAir161057 wanted to compare notes about the things in life that feel like items only money can buy. They asked:
"For people who grew up with little money, what always felt like a luxury?"
New clothes. I had so many hand me downs and thrift store clothes... new seemed like a dream.
Anxiety
"After growing up in a home where every unexpected problem was a financial emergency, my idea of wealthy became 'I just want enough money that if something breaks I don't get anxiety about how to deal with it.'"
Obiwan_ca_bl**me
Literature
"Getting to buy something from the scholastic book fair."
Rich*itch3232
"My school, at the end of it a bunch of books were 'donated' and then spread out on a table in the library. We all got to go pick one book. So even if kids didn’t get to purchase a book, in the end they had a chance to still get a book. It’s actually how I got my first Harry Potter book. Was a cool idea for any school staff or parents active in their kids’ schools."
glass_pillow
Christmas
"Getting new clothes at Christmas from relatives. I don't know if that is exactly a luxury or the kind of answer you are looking for, but we never had a lot of money when I was in middle school. I went an entire year wearing the same pants everyday. The funny thing was my parents didn't even buy them for me."
"I got them for Christmas from my Grandparents. All the kids use to give me so much sh*t for wearing the same pants everyday. I always told them that I had 5 of the same pair which made me feel good inside and kind of made them ease off even though I know they didn't believe me."
"I remember I fell on the school bus one day and the jagged floor cut a hole right in the knee cap and the panic that went over me was just insane. It was one of the worst feelings of my whole life because I knew that I didn't have any other pants to wear and that now all of the kids in my school were going to know that I only had 1 pair. Needless to say I could not wait for the last month of school to end."
themagicman_1231
I'm Away
"Summer camp, or basically any school trips that had to be paid for. At my school the kids who couldn't afford to go on trips that happened during school hours still had to come to the school, we just sat in a room and did extra work like it was detention."
Helpful_Yams
"I was lucky. If you taught at the day camp your kid could go for free. That was just day camp though not sleepaway camp. My mom found a camp teacher who had no kids of his own and he signed me up as his kid so I could get free day camp. Did that all through elementary school."
randtcouple
Big Deals
"Going out for pizza was a big deal. Those free mini pizzas for reading books were huge."
Shroom4Yoshi
Food is always an issue when you're broke.
Damage
"Being able to turn on the heat in the cold and pay a professional to fix damaged appliances, plumbing, and other issues."
Liggettef
Spoiled
"When my grandma would come pick me up and spoil me. My parents didn't have much money and were addicts so when my grandma would come get me I would come back with new clothes, video games, toys, etc. I used to think my grandma was rich but she actually just had a stable income."
nawlepen
"I was in this position when I was younger. I always thought my grandma had SO much money… but all she did was go to work everyday. Always made sure I had clothes and all my school supplies. I miss her pretty bad."
Keywork29
Water
"I am from a small island in the Pacific. While I mostly still take cold showers, I have always felt that a hot shower is the finest luxury one can experience. I had my first hot shower when I was 22 years old and I can never forget it."
FSMPIO
"This is the kind of luxury I think people take for granted, I always avoided showers in the winter as a kid since most of the time they where cold showers and the temperature here was around 12c° during those times."
PowerfullDio
Showerware
"Towels. Honestly, I was almost 10 When I realized people didn’t just put back on their dirty clothes after a shower because my family was so large (12 kids total including myself) and extremely poor. I thought towels were just for hotels or were maybe a prop on television. I went to a friends house and she asked for my help folding her towels. I remember laughing and thinking she must be rich."
"Long story short, I wasn’t sure which way to fold the towels, and begged my mom to buy them after I revealed that my friend, Simone, had them. She bought a box of used ones from a local auction and I walked around with them on my head feeling like a frigging empress after that, even though—-let’s be clear… these were second hand towels!"
shakezula1025
Or BK...
"Grew up poor and when I was a kid I used to think you were rich if you had a dishwasher and a millionaire if you had one of those refrigerators that have a button for ice. McDonalds was also a luxury, a couple times a year on our birthdays."
chinderellab*tch
Everyone should have access to all of these things. Why is life unfair?
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