People who grew up outside of the realm of the privilege we are used to are often in for a culture shock once they cross the boundary into a different kind of society.
We call that "culture shock." It's not better or worse-just different.
Here were some of the answers.
Grocery stores like Walmart, Publix, and Kroger. Huge and vast, have air conditioning, massive variety and tons of stuff I have never heard of. Huge culture shock to me and my father in 2001 since we had no major grocery stores in Bosnia at the time.
A New Kind Of Culture
When I was in the Marines I had a friend that was from extreme rural Africa.
So we took him to 3d shows and such. He had been in the US for around 6 months but even things like tv was an amazing luxury to him. Someone in the group picked up one at a pawn shop off post and gave it to him and he was just amazed that someone would just give him a TV.
Something nifty. He had it set up so direct deposits would go to an account his village had access to. His salary as an E2 in the Navy made his family semi royalty in the village.
I visited my cousins in the U.S once. I was surprised that your houses don't have walls around them. There were only those fences at the side and back that pretty much anyone can jump over. Where I live the only houses who dont have walls surrounding them are those in compounds or subdivisions that have roaming security guards. Paid security guards not volunteers like the neighborhood watch kind of thing
Keeping A Public Strong
The quality of the public infrastructure, and how respectful city planning is with pedestrians. Sydney is full of beautiful little gifts in the shape of shortcuts, stairs, parks, pathways. Everywhere.
It truly is a joy to just walk through the city.
Also, dogs are more polite than people where I come from.
Western Methods Of Conflict
How little theft there is. I was always told to always mind my bag and make it clear I'm holding it tight. Now I can freely leave it beside me, sometimes not even look! I've had friends leave a purse on a table in a restaurant and I made jokes about how easy it would be to steal it. Just a lot more relaxing in public due to less theft.
Another one is how less physical fighting in schools there is. From a young age I was always told "if someone hits you, hit them back harder" but when we moved to UK my dad told me before my first day of school "if someone hits you, tell the teacher".
Imperfect, But A System Nonetheless
The postal system. The logistics of delivering millions of letters to millions of homes on a daily basis is astonishing. Especially at that price. The idea that I can send a letter across the country and have it reliably delivered the next or possibly even same day is truly impressive.
I grew up in South Africa and have been living in England for 20 years.
1. Cars stop when you walk up to a pedestrian crossing.
2. Double glazed windows are really good at keeping the warm in and the noise out.
3. I can walk around at night without thinking I'm going to get shot or robbed.
4. There are only a few people on building sites and the buildings get built in a quick and organized manner.
5. When things break - someone will come and fix it.
I could go on all day....
Even Paying People Falls Apart
Coming from the worst country to a better one, it surprises me how easy it is to do a transaction online.
Apply visa? do it online. They will notify you once they need documents, once you are ready, etc. Every step of the process.
Pay bills? Fine, do online banking.
Order food, groceries? Do it online, call for delivery.
Schedule for appointment? Call, Do it online.
Meanwhile in my country, you need to do all this PHYSICALLY. Fall in line for hours. Registration done?
On to the next step - payment. Uh oh, you need to go the bank, collect the receipt and come back here.
You want to do it online? Good luck with the websites and slow internet. I could go on and on.
Not Sure Where This One Is
The one thing which baffled me is how there is an absence of petty crimes and how the shops in the city center were not worried about displaying their wares outside their shops. There was no risk of someone stealing those tiny stuffs.
Also at night , the shops were just closed with their glass doors. no extra iron shutters with multiple locks and stuffs.
Pedestrian Right Of Way
I visited Germany once with my family. We were about to cross the road when a Porsche came racing through. Living in India, we experience daily traffic mishaps and there is negligible concern regarding pedestrian safety and courtesy. So we were actually shocked when the driver literally halted to a stop and insisted on us crossing the road. There was no traffic light, no zebra crossings nothing and we actually were used to letting cars pass by before walking, so this was the biggest shock to us.
Life is really tough right now.
It's never been easy, but the world is such a disaster, it's really hard to have faith in humanity.
We need to help one another.
And often times the greatest help comes from a complete stranger.
We all leave an imprint on one another, good or bad.
Some leave a more permanent one than others.
Redditornyxflarewanted to talk about the people from our lives that left a lasting impression. They asked:
"Who is one stranger you still remember?"
So who here still depends on the kindness of strangers?
1986Baby Facepalm GIF by MOODMANGiphy
"I was leaving the hospital in 1986 with my husband and newborn. A lady in the elevator admired the baby and then looked at us and said, 'be good to each other.' We weren’t."
Pay it Forward
"When I was 18 I was at McDonalds trying to get breakfast for all the guys from work, I came up like 5 bucks short and this old guy paid the difference and said 'you’ll have to help somebody out someday too.' So now whenever I get the chance to do something like that for someone that’s what I say. I hope the cycle makes it back to that guy."
"One day I woke up and had a headache. And that headache lasted every day for 2 years. I saw every doctor I could and tried every diet I could. No answers. My quality of life was non-existent and I was on the cusp of losing my job. I was at a restaurant with my mom, I was on one of my specialty diets that was supposed to help with headaches (spoilers, it wasn't)."
"I asked the waitress what was in the salad dressing. She asked 'I know it's none of my business, but can I ask why"' A short conversation later, she mentioned a doctor that worked specifically for people dealing with mold toxicity, otherwise known as MYCOTOXICOSIS."
"That waitress saved my life that day and I don't even remember her name. This was in Superior, Colorado at the now closed CB&Potts. If you happen to read this, you have no idea how grateful my family and I are to have run into you that day. Thank you."
Thanks Sweet Lady
"I had a person like this when I was a kid and I left my wallet next to a vending machine at the mall and when I came back it was gone. I lost a whole 7 dollars and I was devastated. This sweet little old lady saw me having a melt down and I was freaking out about how my parents were going to kill me and this lady legit gave me a 20."
"To an 8 year old who gets 2$ allowance per week a 20 was like getting handed 300$ as an adult. I hope it came back around for her too. Since this was in 1997 and she was probably 70 I don't think she would still be alive today."
"The Sikh man I met on a flight from god-knows-where to London who invited me to their temple to eat for free."
I'm amazed. There are good people in the world. Still jaded.
Thank you stranger...Ufc 205 Thank You GIF by UFCGiphy
"My anxiety was at it's peak and I was walking home from school. Then someone came up to me and just started talking to be like I was a normal person."
"Social skills were @ss, but he didn't seem to care. Gave me the confidence I needed to start doing the same and helping others who were lonely. Thank you, stranger. It was because of him that I was able to help others get out of their Social awkwardness."
"It was around February 2016 and the city got hit with a massive snow storm, I remember waiting at the bus stop with a mother and her child in a stroller. The bus was 45 minutes delayed, it was very cold with the wind chill, when the bus arrived we both got on."
"I chose a seat of the opposite side of the bus and this mother and her now crying child was sitting near the front, I could see that the mother was trying to warm her sons hands but was having no luck while her child kept crying. I moved from my seat and sat next to her and took her child’s hands in my hands. His hands were freezing while mine were toasty from my gloves."
"After about 5 minutes, the child calmed down and the bus was quiet again. I stayed with that mother and child for almost 2 hours on the bus until we finally got to our stop. I never learned of the child’s name or the mothers. I just simple sat there with them warming her child’s freezing hands up."
Stay for Me
"I don’t remember him, just what he did for me. I was 19, got t-boned in an intersection by someone running a red and was knocked unconscious. He was a witness, and I think someone said he was the first person to call 9-1-1. He took my phone while I was out (before the days of locking phones), called my house, no one home, called my dad’s cell, which was answered."
"He told my dad what had happened and which hospital the paramedics said they were taking me to, and somehow managed to avoid making my dad panic about me. I mostly came to before I got loaded into the ambulance, at which point he gave me back my phone and said my parents would meet me at the hospital."
"I gather he then stayed to talk to the cops to speak up for me because I didn’t remember what had happened and the other driver kept saying it was my fault. I never got to thank him for going so far out of his way to help a complete stranger."
I think about her often...
"I believe I was 19 at the time. I worked at Walmart at time and was working in the back that day when a lady that worked in the meat department was walking past me crying, I hugged her and asked what was wrong. She was covered in bruises and she told me her boyfriend beat her. She opened up and told me she was leaving him so I asked if she needed a place to stay that way she's safe and she told me no."
"Turns out he was waiting outside for her during her lunch, I once again asked if she was okay and if she needed help and she said no. After that night I never saw her again. I have no idea if she is alive and safe. I hope she's okay, I think about her often."
CrashCrashing Relapse Records GIF by Red FangGiphy
"This guy that helped me out after I rolled my truck, he was late for work because he stayed with me until the tow truck got there. Really restored my faith in humanity."
Some people just leave a lasting impression. So better. Be kind.
When we hear the words "addict" or "addiction", our mind usually jumps to drugs and alcohol.
But addictive behavior transcends those common vices.
Indeed, people can find themselves becoming addicted to just about anything.
While some pose a less significant threat to one's physical health, they remain no less serious a problem.
Redditor Windsorbear97 was curious to hear which addictions the Reddit community felt weren't given enough attention of concern, leading them to ask:
'What is an addiction that nobody takes seriously?"
Time to cut back on the screen time...
"My phone and my usage of said phone."- VagueViper88
And not the kind you find on stage...
"Some people thrive and are addicted to drama and chaos."- CM_NRS
You can't just have one
"Binge eating."- Loulabee1983
Oh look at that, I must have it!
"Especially if you grew up poor and have more money when you're an adult."
"My mom was so bad with this that when she died it was a disaster figuring out what she had paid for and where she had debt."
"I have a friend who would spend her whole paycheck on Amazon purchases and wouldn't even see this as being an issue, even when she would beg her parents or rich men for money to make rent."
"They usually buy junk they don't even need or clothes."
"So many clothes."
"They always shop when they are not feeling well, it is 100% a coping mechanism."
"I was in my 20s when I realized that no one else had a mom who would go to Walmart with a 100$ budget cause they were feeling sad."
"Such an obviously expensive addiction too." - User Deleted
How "social" is it though?
"Dopamine feedback loop from various forms of electronic entertainment and social media sites."- Clintman
"Went to a counsellor after I had taken any sort of social media app off of my phone in an attempt to stop using it to distract myself from what I'm feeling because I'm currently going through a break up."
"Basically as soon as I got too emotional in the session, she suggested we do this blinking exercise where you look at a nice photo and blink and do that a few times."
"we did this because she 'knew distractions worked well for me'."
"That's why I'm back here as well."
"Seems pointless to distract myself if my 'good' option is to be distracted by someone else sitting across the room."- Glum_Advertising_958
Can't think of getting through my day without it.
"Caffeine, without a doubt in my mind."- No_Relationship9732
Big money... not really
"It’s taken seriously to an extent, but things like the lottery are very glamorized, and there’s so many tv competitions and radio competitions etc out there nowadays and they’re kinda gateways."- Safe-Initiative4266
There's no harm in putting something off... until it's too late!
"It’s embarrassing because I should be able to 'just do it', but then a task that shouldn’t feel too hard will feel so daunting and impossible, I’ll end up doing it late or sometimes not at all, and the whole cycle is the root of so many problems in my life."
"It’s emotionally and functionally horrible when it gets bad enough."
"I’ve read all the advice out there and none of it works for me for longer than a day or two."
"I’m at my wit’s end and feel crazy because it’s so illogical but I can’t stop."- thatbassonist
Indeed, if you find yourself unable to kick a particular habit, it might be worth asking yourself if this is, in fact, just a habit.
And then find the courage to ask for help should you need it.
Banning and censorship is nothing new in America.
Or, in the world at large really.
It all starts on a small scale.
They start stripping us of things at school and work.
You know, all for the greater good.
Redditor t0rnado_thegamerwanted to discuss the items that have been taken out of circulation for ridiculous reasons. They asked:
"What's the stupidest thing your school/work banned?"
I feel the banning has only just begun. But let's see what we've already lost.
FallenGIF by LeannimatorGiphy
"We weren't allowed to build a snowman because it 'might fall on you.' They suggested we build a 'snow forest' instead - snowballs on the ground > 1 meter apart. Nobody built snow forests."
"6th graders and only 6th graders weren't allowed to draw outside of assigned art projects. I heard any number of reasons for the ban--'gang signs,' vandalism, distraction--but never got one for why the ban didn't apply to 5th or 7th graders. My only guess is that one of the 6th grade teachers just really hated seeing children's artwork."
"My primary school (age 5 to 11) in the UK banned talking during lunch. Every single child had to eat lunch in a big room, in absolute silence. No talking to friends or socialising allowed. It was pretty insane now I think about it."
"I was gonna comment this too. My school banned talking at lunch if it got too loud. We had a cup at each table the teachers would make us turn them over and stop talking frequently each lunch."
"The theory was that someone would choke and no one would hear them if it was loud. Incidentally, the only time somebody choked was during a period of quiet and nobody knew because YOU CAN’T TALK WHILE CHOKING!! The person was fine though."
The Rule Book
"The lack of shoes, as in there is an specific rule against it detailing what should and should not be worn in your feet, all this because a friend of mine read the Rule book and it only said that 'Students must always come wearing appropriate pants and shirts that do not break the etiquette code.' He went to school with shoes and took them off at the entrance for a semester just to piss off the principal. I love that guy."
CodeCharlie Brown Snow GIFGiphy
"Anything with a snowman on it. Apparently that was code for cocaine."
Wow, Snowmen really get a bad rap out in these streets.
OuchGo Easy On Me GIF by AdeleGiphy
"We weren't allowed to say anything was easy because it might hurt the feelings of kids who didn't think that thing was easy."
"Back in my high school, they banned water bottles unless they were clear bc people had been sneaking alcohol into school, but like clear alcoholic drinks are a thing?? so it basically did nothing."
"Our school did that, too, after previously banning water bottles altogether. One of my teachers then got really bent out of shape about so many people using disposable plastic bottles but the school was really strict about how clear your water bottle had to be and not everyone had a qualifying reusable bottle on hand so what did she expect?"
in the ye' olden days...
"Bottle flipping when that was a trend in the ye' olden days long since forgotten. I don’t know why, and it’s not like they did a good job telling us about the ban so my first and only detention I’ve ever gotten was from flipping a stupid water bottle. That and the 'fight club' that formed in PE but that’s a different story."
"Probably Yugioh cards.They were banned because a group of moms made up a rumor that in another unspecified country a kid had died while holding a fiend-type monster, so clearly they were satanic. Years later I learned that one of those moms was my friend's mom and she just didn't want to buy the cards for her son."
Ho Ho HoMerry Christmas Reaction GIF by Macy'sGiphy
"Saying Christmas. Had to be called 'the current religious festival.' And no decorations were allowed."
Why are we banning the wrong things? This is nonsense.
People say parenting is one of the most rewarding things in life. That all of the lack of sleep, constant crying, and stress is worth it when you see your baby smile. And all of that is true, for the most part.
However, being a parent is hard, and it's not always easy to give that unconditional love. Sometimes, you do your best for your kids and they still turn out to be people you can't really reconcile with.
You'll always love your kids, but sometimes it's near impossible to like them.
Redditor eyriesistable asked:
"At what point did you realize you don’t like your own kid?"
Some Reddit Users Talked About Momentary Dislike
These are parents of young, cute toddlers and are mostly joking about disliking their kid.
Laughing At Pain
"My 2 year old just yanked my hair and laughed when I said 'ouch!'. I still love him but he's a little f*cker sometimes."
The Classic Toddler Offense
"My two year old got sent home from daycare today because he bit three different kids, unprovoked, before noon."
"He stole my cat."
"Only 18 months old the little prick and he's always had a fascination with animals, any time he sees one he points, starts walking towards it going "aaaaaaaww""
"Anyway, me and my cat used to be best buddies but currently my cat is sat in his lap whilst he's stroking him going "aaaaaaaww""
"And it's the same every day"
A Drinking Problem
"I walked in to her room and caught my kid sitting on her bed drinking a Pepsi. She has always known we are a Faygo household. I can look past some things but when you disrespect me in my own house I just don’t know how you get past something like that."
Waiting To Get Her Back
"Every time the lil' f*cker wakes us up before 5 am. Can't wait untill her teenage years, I will be up at dawn every day asking why she isn't getting out of bed and make some of her day instead. Revenge is only 10 years away."
Others Talked About Issues That May Never Be Resolved
These are parents who don't like their kids' personalities and don't see anything ever changing.
A Missing Bond
"For real, I used to have an issue for several years with my three daughters. I didn't feel the parental love that one would expect. I would still protect them from harm and all that but I did not have the emotional connection I thought I would with my kids. I spoke out of concern with my wife about it several times and she suspects that it was how I was raised by an abusive father figure. Nowadays the love is there but I feel that I missed out on too many things when they were growing up. I did not bond when I was supposed to I guess. I never really went out of my way to hold them when they were little. I just pray that I hid that fact well enough from them that they don't find out. I don't want them to think I don't care..."
Some Of Them Want To Use You
"When they became a narcissistic adult-trash talking everyone for attention, me included. They are a user (of people) like I’ve never seen before. I still love them, but do not like them."
0 for 3
"My grandmother had 3 kids and doesn't like any of them. Loves all three but doesn't like them. The first is just an a-hole who used her for money and her house like a hotel. Second... they just don't click, total opposites. Third is a needy lil mooch/hoarder who throws tantrums over stuff like the frosting color on Easter cookies because "that's not how daddy did it when I was little""
He Is Mean
"He started hating on me from an early age. He would literally give me the cold shoulder - monosyllabic responses to me while not looking up from his games, then become open and chatty when anyone else entered the room. I ate it for years - he's just a kid, right?"
"I ended up leaving his dad. He blamed me for everything and called the cops on me after yelling at me over the phone."
"I talked to his brother after the cops left. He was so frustrated on my behalf and only then told me all the low-key things younger brother had done under the radar; he was more mean than I realized; I thought it was only directed at me. My older son was sympathetic and made me feel better. He said his younger brother had a lot of issues."
"I really don't give my younger son an option to call the cops on me again."
Lie, Lie, Lie
"I think it's kinda sad how I know that my stepfather (who had his own daughter) wished I was his kid instead of her. To be fair, the girl kept making stories up about what we did to her and she was alienating him from the rest of his family. I think I can even pinpoint the day he realised that this wasn't miscommunication but rather her just lying about everything."
"She ran away from home and after years of fighting it was finally calm. And honestly, screw her, she didn't have to lie to anyone about us, she didn't have to steal from me or my mum to the point that a gift for my birthday was a lock on my door."
"I hope she doesn't screw over whoever is taking care of her now but I doubt it."
These are some intense stories! Parenting is hard, and the truth is, when it's good, it's good, but when it's bad, it's really bad.