Sometimes love is often more hurtful than beautiful. In hindsight we can recognize the reasons behind the hurt others (those who loved us) caused. Nine times out of ten they left us to pick up the pieces because they weren't ready. And that is never an excuse to treat others pooorly.
Redditor u/chairnoleg wanted to see who felt like sharing some of their worst memories by asking.... What's the worst way someone has broken up with you?
50. This Good Boy Did Nothing Wrong
While not me getting broken up with, I had a dog for a few years and entered a relationship with a girl who just didn't like dogs but she didn't really interact with the dog to much until she started coming over more and other than that she was a pretty good person and cute. She just treated him unnecessarily cruel. Leaving him outside for long periods of time, yelling at him, not even petting him!
It got to the point where she wanted to take the next step and I was still unsure but then she said the dog had to go if we were going to move in, get married etc. and it was like a punch in the gut. Where the relationship wasn't bad at all but when that ultimatum came up it was like a light switch came on. The next day I told her we should take a break (that ended up being permanent). After discussing and airing our issues I basically said I wanted a dog more than her.
49. Tupperware TalesGiphy
My first boyfriend broke up with me in his basement while both our moms were upstairs 10 minutes into a 2 hour Tupperware party.
Was this in the 60's-70's?
No. This was probably 2006. They are still a thing, I've been dragged to one more recently as an adult.
48. Drastic Measures
Obligatory "not me" but a close friend got dumped in a way that was so spectacularly awful I can't not mention it.
Said friend ended up in a relationship with a co-worker. I only met the guy once, but he was a bit... off. Early thirties and had never moved out of his parent's house, while the person he was seeing was just newly 18 when they started. Anyway, everything was fine with them at first, and then one day she just stopped hearing from them. Turned out he had decided he wasn't keen on the relationship. Unfortunately, he got advice from some utter psychopath (I'm reasonably sure it was one of his parents, as he didn't have any other friends, but can't be sure) on how to do so.
So, he decided the best way to dump her was to accuse her of sexual harassment. She got a meeting with HR, which was pretty unpleasant as you can imagine, and it turned out he had came out with a bunch of pretty horrific allegations. She almost lost her job, and everyone assumed she was a predator for a while, which drove her to some really dark places. It all blew over when it became apparent his accusations were all bull, after he kept on changing his story, coming out with details that didn't make sense, and at one point sexually harassing her while this was all going on. I believe he was fired, and she never heard from him again, but it's taken her a long time to recover from it. It's been about four years now and I'm still genuinely aghast at it.
47. Nah Bruh
I had one girl tell me that she had to choose...the good guy or the bad boy. I responded "I'm the bad boy right"? Apparently not.
46. Just. Like. That.
7th year together.
She wakes up and tells me it's over. Instantly. Like that. No symptoms or any clear indicator that this would happen but it did.
You'd think after so long, you'd have some mutual respect. Especially after how much I took care of her (she suffers depression and frequently "forgot" to take meds).
The kicker is 6 months later she begged me to come back.
"Nobody understands me like you do. You're the only one who can lift me out of depression. I want us to go back to the way things were. I'm so stupid for destroying a good thing."
I told her, "Yeah, I did love you a lot. We had a lot of good times. After what you did, I can't trust you anymore. What's to stop you from doing it again? Anyway, I've met another woman. I like her a lot and I'm happy. I hope you find your happiness one day."
45. Nah I'm Good
Through a text saying roughly something like: "Hey, I am so sorry but I found someone who fits me better. We can still be friends tho right?"
That guy was my rival (and a friend) in my sports club. I quit pretty soon after that...
44. You Couldn't Have Waited?
Obligatory not me, but an acquaintance recently broke up with his fiancee by taking her to a really romantic and posh restaurant and asking for the ring back in the middle of dinner. Needless to say, she cried in the middle of the dining room. Not sure if he picked up the check or made her split it after that.
43. I'll Explain It Again
Made me come over to have lunch, insisted on going to an expensive sushi place, had me pay, then wanted to go shopping and told me she didn't have enough and would pay me back, I loaned her a couple hundred. Then on the way back home she broke up with me, then the next called to tell me how happy she was without me. Next day she got drunk and called me to tell me all the guys she's meeting, so then I changed my number... then messaged me on FB, then I blocked her, and then she shows up at my place wanting to talk... but she wanted dating advice. I repeatedly had to remind her that she broke up with me and it's not okay for her to continue contacting me.
42. When Is The Right Time?
I was deployed for 6 months. We had kept in touch the whole time I was away, and had a bunch of things we planned to do together once I returned. I was terribly homesick and knowing that I would see her at the end was what really kept me in good spirits. 3 weeks before I return, she tells me she doesn't love me anymore because she's "changed as a person". No further explanation.
It was a miserable three weeks. I wish she'd told me after I got back or much sooner.
41. Case Dismissed
She told me she had to break up because she was going to jail.
Three days later I got a call from a friend of hers saying "No, she broke up with you because you're a virgin."
Years later she has like three kids and is single again. Karma.
40. Fool Me TwiceGiphy
Both times with the same guy:
Break-up 1: I found out he was talking to other girls on instagram/Twitter. When I called him out on it he said that he had been wanting to take a break for a while and broke up with me. Like an absolute idiot, I got back together with him shortly after.
Break-up 2: I planned a week-long vacation to another country with him. We went, had a great time, and 2 days after we got back he called me on the phone late at night and broke up with me again. I'm not an idiot now so I definitely will not be dating him again.
39. Why Text That To The Group Chat?
I realized they wanted to break up when they went quiet for a few days and texted the groupchat 'I'm going to bed with a lot of inner turmoil, I think I've made a horrible mistake'. I texted him and basically said 'just do it man', and that was that. We're still friends, but he remains incredibly spineless which I pity him for more than dislike.
38. No. Racists.
Was told I was "too nice"
I was dating a South African girl and i think the fact I have black friends disgusted her. Many times I'd sit in her kitchen and her and her mother would tell me how disgusting black people were.
Think I dodged a bullet too be honest. She was the hottest girl I'd ever been with but I can't deal with that racist stuff so, her loss not mine 😂😂.
37. Hashtags Too Far
Going on a trip to Ireland which he proposed we do and then dumping me a few weeks later because he "didnt feel the same way" then gaslighting me/making me seem crazy to his friends because I was 'just his buddy'. I thought we were dating. It was 5 months together, pet names and feelings shared. Anyway,
He's a Jesus freak now married to his #christiangodlywomanwholesomejesuslover, or so he hashtags on IG.
36. This Fight Didn't Need To Happen
When I was in middle school she told me she was "breaking up with me for my best friend".
I ran out of the classroom a crossed the hall busted the door open and fought my best friend.
Plot twist: It was an April Fools joke 😬
35. My Own Place
Told me not to get a roommate, I got an entire apartment in nyc then he lied about wanting to help me pay for it / stay there with me
Told me he didnt know if he could stop lying to me. Told me he didnt have the money to pay and didnt love me anymore
Left me alone to live in the apt for a year =)
34. It's Not You It's Me
After a couple months of dating she came directly over to my apartment, took my hand, looked me in the eyes and said she didnt have feelings for me, that we could be friends maybe one day, but she thought we should just end the relationship altogether. She gave me a hug and kissed me on the cheek. I think I just said, "Okay" once.
And just like that, she was gone.
33. Already Gone
I'd been with this guy for over a year. I was head over heels in love and thought he felt the same. Woke up one morning to find him gone. We were at my place and I had picked him up so I had no idea where he had gone. I thought at first that maybe he had walked up to get coffee or something but when he didn't come back after about 30 minutes, I started getting a little worried.
Then I found the Dear Jane letter he left for me. While I was sleeping, he had written the note and then called a taxi to pick him up (this was pre-Uber). I tried calling but he wouldn't answer. Eventually, I got a hold of his brother who told me that my now ex was a jerk and a coward and I deserved better. He was absolutely right. My ex had treated me like crap and I put up with it because I was so in love.
32. Pulled A Missing Stunt
Together 11 years. He tells me he's headed home for Mother's Day, nothing out of ordinary.
He then goes missing for 7 days. Phone off. No one knew where he was. I had a mental breakdown. Parents had to come and get me into the hospital to see doctor and psychologist.
He finally comes back while I'm sitting on the floor of our kitchen sobbing. He just steps over me to get a cup out of cupboard and pours him self something to drink and goes to sit down on his computer. Acts like nothing.
I soon find out from a friend that he flew to another city for an online connection half his age.
I confront him about it but he refuses to talk.
While I'm at work, he packs up his stuff, takes the pets, quits his job and moves 1000 miles away for the new person and has never spoken to me again.
The sheer lack of respect and remorse is what I struggle with most.
31. A Weird 90s Movie
So, I used to date this woman in High School, Fiona. Great girl, kind, really pretty, I loved her to bits. Anyway, final day of school during my graduation ceremony, she comes up to me and straight up dumps me in front of my parents while they're taking pictures of us. She said I was "too predictable" or something, as if that's a bad thing.
She runs off and leaves me hanging, and next thing I know, she's up on the band stage making out with the singer (who looked suspiciously a lot like Matt Damon) and they start singing a song about me and how I don't know things like I'm Jon Snow.
30. They Fired Me, But I Had No IdeaGiphy
Professionally, my client told the local newspaper they were breaking up with us - and didn't tell us. The newspaper published it on the front page, above the fold, of the Saturday edition. So all our early bird family and friends told us when we woke up.
29. It's Always After A Long Time
Gave me a really nice gift, which I was a bit blown away by, and then ghosted me for three weeks - after my messaging him a few times to ask what was wrong, multiple times because he was acting off. He then FACEBOOKS me breaking up with me, using the excuse his phone was broken , and has a "lot of stuff going on" right now. He then got with another girl straight after, who has been all over his facebook page flirting with him.
I just wish he'd have been honest and said it wasn't working than to flat out ignore me for weeks. We were together for almost a year.
Strung me along for a year while gaslighting me that I was paranoid over his ex. Spoiler: I wasn't. They were messing around. And took several holidays together during that time that he passed off as "group things with my creative friends you wouldn't understand".
27. Out Of The Blue
We dated for 2 and a half years. Went to a New Year's Eve party, and on the way home she started asking me weird questions. Just like, "have you made any plans for my birthday yet?" (her birthday was in early January), I said yeah, but I haven't made firm reservations yet. We get to her house, I open the car door for her and walk her to the door. She turns around and says I think we should just be friends, shut the door in my face and that was that. Came out of absolutely nowhere, and 4 years later I still don't know why she did it.
26. Heartbreak Warfare
Partner of 4 years went off traveling in El Salvador. I spoke to her plenty of times when she was away and all was good with the 'i love yous' and 'i miss yous'. I completely forgot the actual day that she was coming back and I was meant to be picking her up from the airport. I knew she didn't always have internet access so I text her dad who ghosted me.
Fast forward to the day before she was meant to be coming home, I dropped her a message to ask what time she wanted me to be there and she responded that she didn't think it was a good idea that I picked her up and that she would talk to me about it 'when she was ready'.
Fast forward a further 3 weeks and she screamed at me for contacting her because I hadn't heard anything and was in absolute pieces. Then told me that the guy she was messing around with in El Salvador wasn't half as needy as I am being.
Went round, picked up my stuff and cut all ties to then start getting phone calls and texts about 8 months later about how we should talk and how sorry she was. Never picked up the phone and actually didn't read any of the messages after the first 3. I think I won the war.
25. Pay Child Support; Do Not Pass Go
I was 3 months pregnant and he dropped me off at my mums house and didn't come back for me. I didn't hear anything from him until after my daughter was born. We arranged to meet up but he didn't show up.
He got his brother to call me asking if he could pay me a lump sum of money to not have to pay child maintenance. I calculated £15 per week until she is 18. His brother started stuttering and said that was way too much, and that he was thinking something more like £2000 😂 I told him to shove it.
24. Gas Light
My abusive ex-wife (who was the one to propose to me) of 3 years (no kids) woke up one day and said: "I wasn't actually ready to get married". This was less 2 months after she asked me to get her pregnant (made excuses because I knew she was unstable). Then she calls her rich parents to come pick her up (even though she has her car).
And then she left me in limbo without actually filing for divorce for another 7 months, throughout that time putting me down, calling me the worst possible names, insulting me, telling me that I wasted 4 years of her life, and harassing me by calling me past midnight, constantly gaslighting me making me feel like I need to "prove" that I deserve her. And then she even elongated the divorce to another 8 months, hired 2 different lawyers trying to unsuccessfully get a restraining order or alimony, even changing terms after coming to an agreement during divorce mediation.
I realized why superstars don't get married.
23. It Really Do Be Like That Sometimes
Oh boy where do i start:
- left me for my best friend and roommate
- cheated on me with ex and tried to blame me for being upset about it
- dumped me after we said we loved each other the day before
It be like that sometimes.
22. A Lie Broke It Up
One of my ex girlfriends ignored me for a month when I tried to call her. After a month she answers on her home telephone and when I come over to her place I ask why she didn't answer me. She says that she broke her phone. She had gotten a new phone about two weeks ago she says. So I ask for her number and she says that it's the same one. I just straight up left her after that. Apparently she had thought that I was cheating on her with someone else. Turns out it's some girl that I know who lied to her about it.
21. Cowardly Lions
Was dating someone long distance. Was looking at grad schools nearby and elsewhere. Wouldn't talk to me for days, then got a long email detailing how he wasn't ready for me to move in with him and that it's too fast blah blah (like.. I didn't even apply yet and if I got in, it would be almost a year before it started.. + mentioned I would move in with a classmate). A year later, I found out he got engaged to someone.
20. Wrong Flavor?Giphy
He literally ran away. We got back from a gig and I went to put some ice cream in the freezer only to hear footsteps and the door slamming. Ran out and he was legging it down the road. idlewildgirl
19. The Text Chain.
Over text, but she texted my best friend and told him to tell me she's done with me. She was terrible before she did that though. Unfortunately you often don't find out people's true colors until AFTER you enter a relationship. TacticalWatermellon
18. She's a Keeper.
We'd been together for 3 years. She borrowed several hundred dollars from me a week before (knowing the whole time that she was going to do this). When she broke up with me, all she did was tell me that she didn't love me any more. No discussion, no explanation, nothing. She then kept the break-up secret, moved to another city, mooched off of my friends, trashed their apartment, and nearly killed their dog. cyrus_hunter
17. The Recovery.
She told me she didn't want to be married anymore while we were finishing a hook up. We were both young and incompatible and too stubborn to see it until it was too late. I was bad at picking up after myself and had little ambition or drive. She was uptight and extremely career driven. After I had been living alone for a few months is when it really hit me just how incompatible we were. I'm remarried though and have 3 kids and a wife I can talk with for hours without getting tired. Tzaddik_1726
Ok, you win. Ouch! Sympathies! justonemore365
16. It's for Real if it's Facebook!Giphy
Changed their fb status to in a relationship with someone else 😬. wormbreath
That's the equivalent of an employee being locked out of the system and their password changed without actually being notified about being fired. SoyboyExtraordinaire
15. Peace Out.
Traveled 5 hours by train to see me only to get my house, say she doesn't love me and that she wants to break up.
She leaves, I cry for about 15 minutes then call my best friend and ask if he can come over with some beers so I'm not home alone all weekend. I hear her in the background asking him something.
Yup, she traveled 5 hours to break up with me so she could screw my best friend without feeling guilty about it (I no longer talk to him). AkariAkaza
14. Fortnight Kills.
Was with her for just shy of 2 years. Holidays, Festivals, discussions of marriage the lot.
Claimed she lived at home with her Mum, who had terminal cancer, and as a result her mum didn't want to bring anyone new into her life as the pain of knowing she would soon leave them was too much. Therefore we spent all our time at mine and I never met her family or mum.
Received a message from a guy one night asking how I knew her, I explained, turns out her Mum was fine, and she had been engaged to this guy and living with him the entire time... they were due to get married in a fortnight.
Still blows my mind that she managed to play us both so well the entire time.
(So technically, I guess he kind of ended it by revealing the truth lol, I just wished him the best of luck and cut all ties immediately, didn't give her the satisfaction of letting her know she had hurt me). b4rn5ey
13. Forget Something?
By not telling me at all. We had been together for 3-4 weeks and one day I was just coming home from work and I saw her walking with another dude. I confronted her in front of him and the conversation went something like this :
Me : "Hey (her name), who's this?"
Her : "Oh, hey, this is (his name), my boyfriend."
Me : "Uhmm haven't we been in a relationship for like a month now?"
Her : "Ugh I guess, but we clearly broke up yesterday evening."
Me : *visible confusion*
We didn't break up that evening, we just had a minor squabble about how we should spend more time together (I was working 12s that week), we even kissed when I was leaving her place and she told me "I love you."
I was so astounded I couldn't even be mad. Forgot about her in a few weeks and moved on with my life. yrugay1
12. Over it.
I was 17. He was my first everything, pretty much. 8 months into the relationship, he says, "I don't love you. I never did. I just wanted to have fun." I'm almost 30, and I'm over it, but I still wonder what the heck made him do that. LumpySpaceDingus
11. Young Love.
The entire relationship:
Him: *signs onto MSN Messenger*
Him: "will you go out with me?"
Me: *internally screaming with joy* Yes!
Him: "awesome. I love u"
Me: "ummm cool"
Him: "Say it back"
Me: "We just started dating, I don't love you yet"
Him: "Its over"
12 year old me was pretty sad. uhxohkristina
10. Next Year.
Dated a guy for one month short of 3 years. Everyone, including me, thought we'd be a forever couple. He talked about engagement and marriage within the first 8 months - right up to A WEEK before it all ended. We were laying in bed, and he told me "I can't wait to be engaged by this time next year."
Fast forward a week. Everything was normal, we went on a nice date night, he spent a couple nights at my house, and went home. Everything seemed fine. We texted like we always did for a few days, until he said he needed to discuss something. Long story short, he texted that he needed a break. I said I understood, and would respect that.
A week later he calls me, and says "You aren't going to like what I have to say." I asked if he was breaking up with me and he said yes. Dated for almost 3 years, and you break up over the phone? I asked if there was a reason. "I haven't loved you for the past 6 months." whatevs1990
9. I'll Do it Myself....
By making me do the break-up for him.
He slowly withdrew emotionally, and started to become increasingly irritable and inconsiderate. If I brought up any of these issues he would act insulted, at how I could think that of him, or say/imply maybe it was my fault for not being considerate enough of him and what he was going through.
It was so slow and incremental, it took me a long time to figure out we weren't going through a "rough patch." Or he wasn't having a hard time that I needed to support him through.
With my last remaining crumb of energy and self-esteem, I did what he wanted all along and did the breaking up for him, I broke my own heart. He screamed and insulted me, stole a bunch of my stuff, and later I found out he gave me the kind of HPV that gives you cancer (which I did get, but was treated). zazzlekdazzle
8. Unhappy new Year.Giphy
NYE: Took my then-wife of 13 years to get couples massage, then a fancy dinner. Paid good money to get into a club she wanted to go to. I go get us drinks and when I return, she whispers in my ear "Let's just be friends."
TLDR: got friendzoned after two kids and over a decade of marriage.
Tbh, I like being not married to her better so no biggie now. stellarbeing
7. Just Dance.
I took my girlfriend of one week to homecoming freshman year, and right after we got there she walked away and had her friend come and say she wanted to break up. I had a separated shoulder from football, and I remember chilling there in my sling feeling bummed as heck.
Later that night, she came over and asked me to slow dance and I told her to screw off. Lead5alad
6. Why Stay?
Dropped around to my place hours later than she said she was going to on a Saturday, which was a common theme with her.
Sensing I was annoyed despite me trying to deny it, she hits me with "No, I think you're upset because you know I can't be your partner anymore."
Okay... that's news to me, but okay... so we talk about it for the rest of the afternoon. It's now Saturday night. We hang out. She stays the night.
She initiates sex. We fall asleep. She hangs around on Sunday... all day. It's now Sunday night. No sex, but we sleep together. I wake up on Monday, leave her in my house and go to work. I get through work, go home, and she's STILL THERE.
I'm confused at this point and tell her kindly that I might need a bit of alone time to process things and she gets offended. Weirdest and saddest weekend of my life. El_Suavador
5. She is triflin'!Giphy
She cheated on me with 5 different women in 10 days. Whilst I was in hospital. Having brain surgery. She dumped me two days after I came out of hospital, whilst at her parent's house, on Christmas Day. shinyhappycat
His mom made a birthday meal for me. The night before the meal, he verified what kind of cake and frosting I wanted. The day of, he was being dodgy over text about not wanting to go his parents' to eat. Since I knew they made a special dish just for me, I showed up on the time we had agreed to beforehand.
Five minutes after I arrived, he showed up in a state of distress. He accepted a phone call from his ex-fiance and left me with his parents for ten minutes while talking to her in a different room. When he got off the phone call, he came over to me, looked me in the eyes and told me, "this is a nightmare."
I got up and thanked his parents for preparing the meal that hadn't yet been served. realish
3. Dial Tone.
Waited until I was at work and him and my coworker who had met the night before when I introduced them decided they were in love. They went in my apartment and stole some of my stuff. She stole my clothes and they moved into a tent together. He then got her pregnant. One day he had his friend call me and ask if he could come back. She was now on drugs and not taking care of their baby. He wanted me to take him and the baby back. I said you ever call me again I will call your girlfriend and tell her. Never heard from him again. truisluv
2. Had about twenty seconds?
"I never loved you, I don't love you and I never will. You're not worth 10 seconds of my time."
This was after a year of telling me I was #1, that he loved me and would always love me, that I was the one person he wanted to talk to every single day. He had never felt this way about anyone before, he'd take a bullet for me, his heart would beat so fast and hands would sweat when he was with me because he was nervous, he promised forever, etc.
He swore on his mother's life, he swore to God, etc... then we hooked up, he gave me an STI and ghosted me. Anyway, when I cried and begged for an explanation, that was the response. I spent the next year literally crying every single day, multiple times a day. Qwert_yu