When you're a kid, most of the time, adults make no sense. Parents always seem to devise arbitrary reasons to stifle fun under the guise of "safety and concern." Of course the best reason I most often recall is... "because I said so!" That one in particular always seemed a little fishy to me. But if we knew what was good for us, we acquiesced. However, in hindsight, every so often, parents have some weird motivations.
Redditor u/Korn_makes_me_horny wanted everyone to tell us about the times in childhood parents made some "questionable" decisions by asking.... What's the weirdest rule your parents made you follow as a kid?Menu Choices
GIF by Pop-Tarts
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Chocolate PopTarts are dessert and therefore can only be eaten on Saturdays. Fruit PopTarts are obviously nutritious and are to be eaten during the week. (There was no healthy option instead of PopTarts.)
Be Home
If someone asked me to hang out with them, I had to go (unless it was after curfew or someone my parents didn't like). As an adult I understand that my parents wanted me to be social and wanted me out of the house, but how it felt as a kid was that I needed to give other people what they wanted, my time was not my own, and my feelings always came second to others. Not a great lesson to give your kid.
In & Out
My friend's Filipino mum would only let us play his Sega Megadrive for 15 minutes before literally kicking us out the house and locking the door so we had to play outside. After 2 hours outside she would give us another 15min on the Megadrive.
I once pooped myself in his driveway because she wouldn't open the door.
king yes GIF
Them 90's Shows....
Grew up in the 90's and 00's my mother would not let us watch king of the hill specifically. when I was about 15 I asked my dad why and he said "besides the fact that it is not funny, I have no idea."
Same! Any 'adult' cartoons of the 90s and 2000s (Simpsons, Futurama, Family Guy, King of the Hill, Beavis and Butthead - pretty much every vaguely edgy cartoon of the era) was banned for me growing up because my mom hated them. Made me feel really left out when I was young. It still makes me feel left out, because I never ultimately got into any of them so other people think there's something wrong with me.
Wardrobe Malfunctions
My parents were very chill for the most part but they (particularly my dad but sometimes my mom too) would get on a high horse about the most random issues.
One of them was hats. My parents HATED us wearing hats. Any hats. It was the craziest thing. We really were only allowed to wear them like dress-up clothes and sometimes not even then. Even if it went with our outfit, you couldn't have it on in the house for thirty minutes without hearing one of them snap, "Take that hat off your head!" Going out in public with a hat on was forbidden, unless it was actually snowing. Sometimes, for Christmas and such, relatives would give us hats that they thought we would like, but we were never actually allowed to wear them anywhere.
One other exception was when we did Little League, of course, a ball cap was part of your uniform. My dad would freak out on us if he caught us with it turned backwards or to the side, because "That is disrespectful to the game of baseball! It is not the way that hat is meant to be worn!" It was the 90s, backward ball caps everywhere, so at the time we felt it was especially lame that we couldn't. When I went to summer camp, I packed a baseball cap and wore it backward the entire time because they finally weren't there to stop me, haha.
Wordplay
Not really the weirdest but the only one I remember: we were allowed to say the word 'a**' but not 'a**hole' because that would make it too inappropriate/descriptive. Still funny to this day.
Another one is where my dad buys new things and doesn't allow anyone to use them. "Why are you taking your new umbrella out? It'll get wet!" or "Don't wear your new shoes, they'll get dirty!" These are all things he has said before, lol.
TV or Not to TV
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We were not allowed to watch Harry Potter, but we were allowed to watch Wizards of Waverly Place.
Meh?
I wasn't allowed to say, "I don't care" when I was a kid. My parents viewed that as leading to a callous attitude about the suffering of others.
Of course, the emotional burden of having to care about everything has left me jaded.
"Do you want peas or carrots for dinner?"
"I don't care"
Gets smacked!!
The Greens
Wet Hot American Summer Cooking GIF by NETFLIX
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I was not allowed to mix my salad dressing in with my salad. I had to just hope it coated the leaves while I was eating it.
in the pocket....
I was not allowed to put my hands in my pockets (unless I was getting something out of them). "Only lazy people put their hands in their pockets..."
JTT Forever
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My mom wouldn't let me put posters on my wall because she said it would start a fire. Ya know, because my JTT posters might spontaneously combust.
The 90's
I wasn't allowed to watch the show Martin because it was full of dirty jokes and bad black stereotypes.
I could watch In Living Color, however.
My parents let me watch in living color with them when I was around 4 years old. Homey D. Clown and the Head Detective defined me.
Free Dogs
Every morning when I woke up we had to eat a hotdog because my dad worked at the hotdog factory and he got unlimited free hotdogs so basically every meal for my entire childhood was hotdogs.
Superstition
Super Bowl Football GIF by Frito-Lay
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For several years, everyone had to wear a hat while watching the Steelers game, because my mom decided it was good luck.
"Crude"
Watching The Simpsons, ever. I was 10 when it premiered; now, in my 40s, I'm still not allowed to watch it in their house while visiting. The main reason I was always given was "It's so crude!" "Crude" meaning the fact that Smithers is gay and Marge thought of cheating on Homer in one episode in 1990.
Clip Clip Here.... Clip Clip There....
Flush my nail clipping (as opposed to just throw then in the trash can).
Just gonna put it out there that some people, particularly more witchy peeps, are super careful to discard their hair and nail clippings in such a way that it cannot be collected by another person and used against them in like a spell or such.
Idk what your parents reasoning for flushing the nail clippings but just gonna leave this here lol. Oh as a side note, I'd flush those bad boys just to be totally rid of them VS maybe finding one that missed the trash receptacle just laying around randomly one day when I'm sittin' on the throne. floopyferret
Stay Awake
No sleeping over at a friend's house whatsoever because "little girls shouldn't be doing that", but my mom is a Jehovah's Witness so it wasn't that unexpected along with the no birthdays or holidays rule.
Girl Crush
I couldn't cut my hair above my shoulders… When my mom found out I was gay, she for bid me from going over to any females house except for the one girl I had a crush on. The girl I had a crush on was Mormon so she knew nothing would happen. She thought I was sleeping with all my female friends even though they were straight.
After 16
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For the boys, no parting your hair down the middle until you're 16. For the girls, no make up/eyebrow plucking/shaving until you're 16.
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Every now and then, though, you hear about an encounter with something that shouldn't be there. Sometimes it's an escaped or released exotic animal; hurricanes have destroyed countless wildlife enclosures and some people don't realize how big that cool pet is really going to get and choose to set it loose.
Sometimes it's a "skunk ape."
Florida's version of a 'bigfoot' sounds a little easier to believe when you factor in the huge number of primate enclosures that have been destroyed over the decades. We have established populations of things like monkeys, pythons, and boars now.
Why not gorillas or orangutans? They're both tall upright hair covered primates that might match the description.
Except skunk ape stories go back way before zoos and the exotic pet industry.
Reddit user cruzer58b asked:
"Those of you that TRULY believe you have seen a cryptid (Bigfoot, jersey devil, etc.) what’s your story?"
South Florida isn't the only place the wild gets weird. OBVIOUSLY.
Look at what these Reddit users have experienced.
The Thing Hunting Orcas
Marine Life Beauty GIF by OceanaGiphy"I was on a ferry for a school softball trip, off Kodiak island AK, 2014. I was 18."
"A whole bunch of us had snuck up to the deck around 11pm to watch the waves and generally be teenagers on a boat without supervision. It was 11pm in May in Alaska so the sun was thinking about setting but it was still bright outside."
"So we’re just doing our thing and we notice a pod of orcas swimming with the ferry’s wake, which is very cool but not, like, unusual."
"If you’re familiar with the dimensions of an orca fin you know they’re about 4-6 ft in height and look like big black spikes coming out of the water. Being Alaskan teenagers, we were very familiar. This is important."
"Orcas travel and hunt in pods of anywhere between 15-40 whales. Apex predators. The beautiful demon murderers of the sea."
"Total a**holes. Top of the food chain."
"So we saw this pod of orcas swimming with the boat, counted around 10- 15, with some babies scattered in there. Very fun to watch for the good 30 minutes to all go by. We tried to get pictures, but it was just dark enough that our shitty 2014 phone cameras weren't much good."
"Another 30 or 40 minutes go by and we’ve all pretty much sobered up and it’s about to finally get dark and we’re cold and sleepy and about ready to go in."
"We haven’t seen an orca for like half an hour, and then one of the girls spots another one and points it out. So we all turn and look at the whale's dorsal fin - but one dorsal fin is immediately followed by another, and another, and another, and then two more, and then two more after that, in two separate rows, and they’re taller, by a LOT, and jagged, like some have whole chunks torn out of them, and they’re all 8-10 feet high."
"And all these fins are attached to ONE creature."
"We can just barely see its back slicing through the water, covered in these rows of spikes, and it just. Keeps. Coming. This thing is like 20 or 30 feet from the ferry, running parallel to it, and we are all transfixed."
"This wasn't a small group - there’s like 9 or 10 of us and no one is saying a word because we’ve all turned to look at a whale and we are all now watching something that is like, horrifically, terrifyingly obviously NOT a whale."
"Someone tries to take a picture but it’s too dark at this point and the only reason we can see this thing is the light cast from ferry portholes, which is a take as old as time when it comes to things that you REALLY f*cking wish you had a picture of."
"But we all stand there completely scared stiff and in awe and we watch this thing just KEEP surfacing for a good 6 or 7 minutes which means that whatever it was was LONG. Like..... 60 or 70 feet long."
"Or longer."
"And covered in enormous spikes. Spikes that looked like they’d won thousands of battles with god knows what."
"It took what felt like an eternity for any of us to say anything after the last of it disappeared back into the strait."
"I mean if you and like ten of your friends had just all seen something that all science had DEFINITELY pointed to not existing, and you had all seen the same exact thing, AND it was very OBVIOUSLY trailing, nay, HUNTING, not one but 15 something APEX F*CKIN PREDATORS, what do you even say to break that silence?"
"That’s the thing that eats me about the whole thing, is it was hunting. It was following them. It was literally hunting about 60 tons of toothy, angry, intelligent apex predator."
"Every once in a while one of us will hit another one of us up and check in, like 'Do remember this? Was I hallucinating? Did we all see the same, insane, worldview-melting, terrifying thing that night?' And the reason I KNOW we did is because none of us talked about it."
"Not during the trip, not after, not to any of our friends because how the f*ck do you even tell someone about something like that?"
"Now we have almost 10 years between us and that night I assume some of them have probably told people, I know I tell people, because I’ve seen a LOT like that in Alaska and I’m That B*tch."
"And also because there’s a very rich history among native Alaskans of a Something that lives and hunts in the waters around Kodiak and it’s important to tell its story because someday it’s gonna eat a little too much plastic and no one will ever watch it hunt a pod of orcas terrified from a boat ever again."
- slobone
The Cutest Cryptid
Arts And Crafts Love GIF by NickelodeonGiphy"One night I was driving home at around 2 AM and this tiny, tiny white creature (probably as tall as a Pringles can, though maybe a bit smaller) walked across the road in front of my car."
"I hadn't thought about this in a while but here's what I can remember: The bottoms of its "legs" ended in what looked like flowy bits or ribbons, and it was almost translucent. I could almost see the road THROUGH the creature."
"It walked at a kind of jaunty pace, just like a person might walk. The best way to describe it is like that super steppy walk that the dwarves sometimes do in Snow White, or Mickey Mouse does sometimes."
"I slowed my car down but was afraid to stop it completely, and the thing disappeared as my car went 'through' it."
"Honestly it was so f*cking cute that I wasn't even scared, but I was shaken up by having seen something like this."
"I couldn't believe what I saw, so I called my then-boyfriend and frantically described the creature. He told me that it sounded like the Fresno Nightcrawler, and when I got home and looked it up, THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE."
"I had never heard about them before. I do not live in California, not even close. I still have no clue what it was."
- Langoustina
The Swimmer
Michael C Hall Night GIF by DexterGiphy"I used to go running and take a break at a train bridge in Iowa city when I went to school there."
"I did a lot of night runs. Sometimes, only after dark, I'd hear something swimming around at that train bridge. Maybe human or deer sized."
"One time, It was late and I heard it again. But this time, I could see something dark on the water. Looked like a profile of a very large head."
"I said 'hello, someone there?' "
"It stopped dead still and looked at me. It was dark but I could tell it was looking right at me. This went on for 30 seconds to a minute. It then went under, and I never saw or heard it again."
"I told myself it was a person swimming. But why not say hi back? Also, where did it go under to?""It was a slow river, I would have heard it surfacing or getting out of the water unless it went over a hundred feet."
"That's the closest thing to a cryptid I've seen and known about."
"Some people are saying beavers and otters. I've seen river otters (but not in the US), it was far too big to be a normal sized one. I've never seen the 6 ft ones, and I don't think they live anywhere near Iowa."
"It was much too big to be a beaver too, I see those all the time, and they're usually denoted by telltale signs such as dams and chewed trees. Also, I've never seen beavers active at night only during the day."
"I think it was probably just a person, maybe a homeless person who wanted to not be bothered by me."
"As I said, that's the closest I've come to seeing a cryptid, I know the original post asked for people that are 100% sure, but it was late at night and it felt appropriate to tell that story."
- orangutanglibrarian
Orangutan/Lemur Hybrid
orangutan GIFGiphy"When I was 14 or so in 2003 I saw what looked like an orangutan/lemur hybrid watching me from the trees."
"When it realized I was looking at it, it took off into the trees and disappeared. This was in Western NC, nothing like that should have been around here."
"For a few years I looked for articles about someone’s escaped exotic pet but never found anything. Eventually just wrote it off."
"Years later I heard a Lore episode about the Pukwudgie and I immediately got chills because the description matched what I saw. I’m still not sure what happened."
"Few months ago I was dumb enough to wander into the same patch of woods. I got nailed by a rock and when I looked up I saw a small outline ducking around like it was watching my reaction. Again, when it recognized I was looking at it, it took off."
"I don’t know what happened but I also don’t really plan on going back."
- kookooforpococuffs
Hopefully A Bear
red dead redemption bear GIFGiphy"About 16 years ago I lived in the rural areas of Kansas, town was about 6 miles from my house."
"At night while I was waiting for sleep I stared out of my window and look out into the darkness. Normally I would see owls, possums, racoons, coyote, etc all just minding their business doing animal stuff."
"And I could always hear them. Loud and clear."
"One night as I am trying to get to bed I watch and listen for the wildlife and on this night there was none to be heard or seen. Being a kid I thought nothing of it."
"Until I saw a HUGE black figure moving on four legs."
"I could swear I had seen a brown bear this thing was THAT massive. Except we lived in midwest Kansas. We have no bears."
"Cows and horses are too tall and not wide enough for what I saw. Plus our neighbors all had cattle so I was familiar with what they look like at night."
"People suggested it could have been one of the massive dogs like a malamute or leonberger or something. Maybe it could have been, but they are still too small for what I saw."
"Never saw it again"
- Staticshivyasuo
"There are bears in Colorado, Arkansas, Missouri, And a bit in Oklahoma. Kansas is in the historic range of black bears as well."
"I don't think it's a stretch that one may have wandered in from a surrounding state."
- sarraceniaflava
"This would relieve years of stress and the itch of the unknown if I could get confirmation that it was, it is how I always make it out in my head. A really big bear."
- Staticshivyasuo
The Big Blue
trailer GIF by Jurassic WorldGiphy"Been deep sea fishing a few times. You NEVER see schools of fish so far out, but once we saw this massive shadow moving FAST. It couldn't have been a whale, they don't move like that. The skipper stared at this mass of blue with me for about 20 seconds before it was gone and swore it was a megalodon. i'm not convinced but I have never seen a school of fish that far out in the ocean ever."
- uncareingbear
"It could be a large species of squid such as Colossal or Giant Squid. They are found world wide. It's odd they would come to the surface, but it's not to weird."
"Other options are Sunfish, Oarfish, or Large Shark."
- kazeespada
"I’m a firm believer there has to be some kind of megalodon or something out there, we just don’t know enough about the ocean"
- cruzer58b
When It Looked At Chandler
scary jack the giant killer GIFGiphy"My friend was at a camp with me and we were in the same cabin, we all stayed up late we got tired and went to sleep."
"My friend, lets call him Chandler, and I stole some instant coffee packets from the kitchen and we had them in water at night. Chandler didn't have a good caffeine tolerance like me so he stayed up a bit after all of us went to sleep."
"I asked him what he was going to do and he said he brought a novel and he was going to read it until he fell asleep."
"It was about 1am and we are all peacefully sleeping and then we hear the biggest scream. Chandler was crying and shaking in his sleeping bag and everyone in our cabin came over to see what was wrong and to help him out."
"He screaming really loud and if that didn't wake up other cabins and the teachers then his loud crying after did. Soon all the teachers were inside out cabin and I had to stay on my bunk bed to not be squashed."
"Chandler told us that he saw a ghost wandering around our cabin. He said he also heard the wind breeze while the ghost was moving. Another guy in my cabin backed him up saying he also heard that."
"Chandler was sent home and everyone continued the camp, however, it felt really weird. I talked to him a lot when we all got home and he told me more details."
"He told me he looked at the ghost for about 3 seconds because he was too shocked to say anything. The ghost was not white look in movies, it was transparent and BARELY visible."
"He told me it looked like a little boy. The little boy was not in our school uniform, but in really old fashioned clothes. Chandler told me he wasn’t too scared of the boy in those 3 seconds but shocked because it was a ghost."
"Then what really screwed him was after those 3 seconds when his brain clicked and he screamed."
"The ghost boy turned and looked at him "with shallow, lifeless eyes" and then rushed out of the cabin. This was the wind sound Chandler and my cabin mate heard."
"Then I remember distinctly what Chandler said because if I was him, I would doubt everything I know. He said 'That ghost looked at me, with no expression, and even though it was only for a split second, it felt like an eternity. I knew it wasn’t just my mind playing tricks when I saw his eyes. There was no soul in them, like it had been sucked away.' "
"I find it really weird because Chandler is the most honest guy I know and he seemed really traumatized."
"I was considering if it was the effect of the coffee, but he had it the night before as well and didn't see and hallucinations. Plus he was a regular drinker and he loved the taste even though it made him stay up."
"This story shakes me to this day."
- DirtyDuckTales
"Not A Deer"
Busch Beer GIF by BuschGiphy"Alright it’s finally my time to shine!"
"The area I live in has a very active deer population. They’re constantly getting hit by cars at night in my area and people constantly have to be on the lookout for these dudes."
"So one night I’m driving home from my friends house around 1am. I’m going pretty slow because the place near my house has a pretty big deer family who loves the area (around 6-7 of them)."
"So I’m driving up a hill going around 30mph and I had to slam on my breaks cause a 'deer' runs in front of my car."
"I don’t know if it was because it was super late at night and I was tired or what. But I sh*t you not, this was not a deer."
"It kind of was, but it had one too many legs and too many eyes. I only saw it for a second cause it ran past my car. But it was the weirdest thing I’d ever seen."
"It was pretty quick when it went by my car, but the 'tail' for sure was a leg, I can say that for certain."
"I even looked it up later and there is a commonly seen cryptid called the “Not a Deer” so that’s just my fun little cryptid story."
- bobcatnat123
Jellyfish In The Air
jellyfish GIF by Monterey Bay AquariumGiphy"Walking through the woods in the southeast US for fun I walked through a field where there were tiny fluorescent jellyfish-like things floating through the air. Maybe half an inch to 2 inches in size."
"I initially thought it was some kind of plant spores or something moving in the wind but when I looked at them closer they were actually moving independently."
"That was about 2006. I spent months going through those woods and that field over and over again with a camera trying to find them but I've never seen them since."
- gettogero
My long-term readers will know I'm super sketched out by orcas and have essentially written off Argentina because their orcas hunt on land.
Alaska clearly needs to get scratched off my list, too.
Anything big enough to hunt orcas is certainly big enough to hunt Ericas and I'm not trying to be on anyone's menu.
Kthankxbye, giant spiky sea thing.
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