People Share Unfortunate Stories About Marrying Into Familes Who Immediately Disliked Them

People Share Unfortunate Stories About Marrying Into Familes Who Immediately Disliked Them
[rebelmouse-image 18357478 is_animated_gif=It's wonderful when two families can come together through marriage. But that happy ending doesn't always happen.
Reddit user TheWardenOfFive asked "People who married into families that didn't like them, what ended up happening?"
Here is how some people were (or weren't) able to get past the rejection.
Kill Them With Kindness
[rebelmouse-image 18357479 is_animated_gif=22 years, 2 wonderful kids and a happy son later (my husband, their son), and they love me. I killed them with kindness, loved them even when they weren't sure about me (I am a different race, that did not go over well) and I finally wore them down.
Disowned
[rebelmouse-image 18357480 is_animated_gif=My sister-in-law's parents didn't come to the wedding. She has no relationship with them now and can't see half of her siblings anymore (they still live at home or are underage) and it just sucks. Our family has accepted her as one of our own, but she did lose her family.
Burned Bridges
[rebelmouse-image 18357481 is_animated_gif=My parents never liked my boyfriend. They thought he had no ambition, never going anywhere in life, why didn't he like talking to them, yada yada yada. They were mean to him, gave him dirty looks when he came over, tried to get me to break up with him. Well we dated for 8 years then I married him. He's a software engineer now and he makes more money than my parents ever did and he's awesome.
I go visit my parents, but he doesn't come with me. I try to rotate which holidays I do with my parents vs my in laws. They tell me to bring him over next time I stop by and I'm always like, yeah okay dad and brush it off. It doesn't bother me, there's just been way too much hurt from my parents and I don't blame him for not wanting to see them.
I see it as my husband is my number one family now and I don't really care what my parents think.
Small Doses
[rebelmouse-image 18357482 is_animated_gif=I limit contact with them. I'm polite at holidays, but I'm even scaling back attending those. My husband does a good job of running interference, but I hate putting him in the middle. The best alternative it's to just remove myself from any potential bad situations.
Definite Red (white & blue) Flag
[rebelmouse-image 18357483 is_animated_gif=The first time I met my husband's step father, I said "hello" and his response was to turn his face away from me and loudly ask "what did that she just say to me?" He's from Pennsylvania, yet rocks confederate flags like they were ever in style.
We don't really spend time with them at all. He isn't welcome, and my mother in law doesn't like to go anywhere without him. We tried to invite her to our last child's birth, but she actually expected to bring that racist idiot with her. So... nah. Plus, I surely do not want that a-hole near my kids.
Divine Intervention
[rebelmouse-image 18345307 is_animated_gif=Her family was heavily religious, thought I was atheist, and I had a kid from a previous relationship which led to some pretty heavy... skepticism from them.
Her career took off after we moved in together and especially after we got married. They swung totally the other way and started ascribing her sudden leap in career success largely to my influence. Really I chipped in a bit, but it was mainly a coincidence (in my eyes). So it worked out OK I guess.
Done
[rebelmouse-image 18357484 is_animated_gif=This is where its ended up with me and my mother-in-law. She has bi-polar and has had episodes here and there, during our wedding she was quite... 'stressed' (aka manic) and was pretty awful, trying to make everything about her.
Then I got along with her (I thought) really well for years, despite the stupid things she would say.. how she pit her sons against one another (granted her eldest is a waste of space).
Unfortunately last year she went 'off' again when she found out we were moving away. Said some wretched things about my husband (her own son) and I defended him while he was out of the room. Apparently that earned me the top spot on her s#$! list. She s#$! on me to her entire family, told lies about what horrible things I've done to her through the years. etc. Told my husband how I refused to respect her and wasn't a part of the family, and on and on.
She's medicated and 'back to normal' now, but refuses to acknowledge what she did and said. She's too embarrassed apparently.... so she's going to pretend that she never said them. And I'm not going to pretend to be her friend. Everything is through my husband now and I talk to her as little as possible.
12 years+ of putting her first because she's divorced, alone, low income, and her older son treats her like garbage. Done. I'm done with it. I refuse to engage any longer.
Hate at First Sight
[rebelmouse-image 18357485 is_animated_gif=They hated me from the start. That hate has only gotten worse. We've been married a decade. No sign of it letting up either. My wife acknowledges that they treat me poorly, so she doesn't have a lot to do with them. Some of the s#$! they've said to my face, I'd never say to my worst enemy. I can only imagine what they say behind my back. It's okay though, I've got an amazing wife and kids. So I'm the winner here.
Mommy Dearest
[rebelmouse-image 18357486 is_animated_gif=We were married for four years, together for seven when I realized I couldn't do it anymore.
His mother was more important. She and the family could make fun of anything, even a small amount of weight I would gain and he would never stick up for me. If I tried they would make it seem like it was in my best interest and he would get mad at me for trying to cause problems with mommy.
Worst part was when my niece, not even a year old, died of a genetic disorder...and she told me that she was better off dead than with me or my family. My now ex-husband heard it....and she convinced him that she either didn't say it or it wasn't "meant like that".
Not in it for the Family
[rebelmouse-image 18357487 is_animated_gif=Me and my wife's family have no contact whatsoever, except for some occasional contact with my father-in-law. He's a nice person.
Me and my wife have been happy together for 15 years now. My mother-in-law has done her best to try to separate us, with no luck whatsoever.
You marry your partner, not their family!
Pruned from the Family Tree
[rebelmouse-image 18357488 is_animated_gif=My paternal grandmother hated my mother from the moment Dad met her because she only had a Master's degree, not a PhD, and therefore wasn't good enough for him. She treated mum like s#$! for the first few years of my life, even after mum moved here to New Zealand from Canada with my Dad and baby me just so my paternal grandparents could spend time with their grandkids.
Grandad was a lovely guy and never had a problem with anything, but after he died when I was 6 there was no one that could reign my grandmother in. Eventually it got to the point where Dad would take us round to visit her and mum just stopped coming.
Dad died a few years ago, when I was 14, the eldest of her only 3 grandkids. Since then she has cut off all contact with us and our mum and the only thing we've heard from her since the funeral is that she cut us out of her will less than a week later in the same letter that she accused my recently widowed mother of being selfish and not letting us see her (we didn't want to, we were mourning and she's a b!@#$). Since then she complained about us to my uncle who is now also not talking to us and we have no contact with any extended family at all.
But I'm Your Mother!
[rebelmouse-image 18353768 is_animated_gif=My mom treated my wife like s#$! before we were married. We hosted Thanksgiving a month after getting married and there was a blowout. I asked her (my mother) to leave. I wrote her a letter explaining what's what. She tried to pull the whole "but I'm your mother!" thing but I didn't bend. Over the next few years they both put forth a lot of effort and were able to build a healthy, mutually respectful relationship. Now they get along great.
Mama's Boy
[rebelmouse-image 18345395 is_animated_gif=My ex's mother was an insanely jealous, insecure and competitive woman who did not want to share her son with any other woman. No matter how outrageous her behavior, he refused to see her in any bad light, to draw any boundary lines or to demand an attitude of respect towards his wife. We're divorced now.
No More Enabling
[rebelmouse-image 18357489 is_animated_gif=I'm anticipating my father-in-law dialing up the crazy when we move. Right now we're next door. We're moving 42 miles away, not planning to give them our new address. If they want to see us, they can meet us in town, at a park or for a meal. Our son will definitely not be over at their house without us.
Not sorry at all, I'm not going to have him around an abusive alcoholic and an enabler with serious issues of her own. They expect him to sleep over/come for weekends when he's older. I don't think so.
Crazy Train
[rebelmouse-image 18357490 is_animated_gif=My mother in law treated me like s#$!. I tried humoring her, I tried talking to her, I eventually had to just ignore her. She cranked the crazy up to 11 at some point and my wife cut off all contact. After about a year of that she started sending threatening texts and leaving threatening voicemails and one day I came home from work and everyone was crying. Apparently she had knocked, ducked below the peep hole, and kicked the door in as soon as my wife turned the knob to give our children Christmas presents. I returned them to her and offered to turn her skull inside out if she ever set foot on my property again and that's about where it's at.
She occasionally sends texts ranging from "r u going 2 send school pics 2 me THIS yr????" to "my attourney has adviced me to my grandparents rights, r u going to play ball or do i have to take full custody AND support IN COURT?" or "am redoing my will. If u don't want my estate i guess i will leave it to my dogs."
Monster-In-Law
[rebelmouse-image 18357491 is_animated_gif=When my now husband and I got engaged, Mother In Law told my parents.. and everyone at the table at our engagement dinner... that I was his second choice and could've decided between me and a doctor (I was working for a great company making very good money for my age - more than her son tbh) I Have never ever seen my dad so angry in my life.. and adding to it... her crying because she's losing her 'baby'
3 years later we barely have any contact.. she's insulted me and my family countless times and I don't need someone who plays games in my life. She recently texted me that she was disappointed in me.. well IDGAF.
Witchy Woman
[rebelmouse-image 18357492 is_animated_gif=His grandma accused me of being a literal witch and putting a spell on him. That's the only reason he married me.
Toxic
[rebelmouse-image 18357493 is_animated_gif=My husband already knew his family was toxic; them not liking me was just one more thing on the list. Once we had a kid of our own, he realized that he didn't want his children growing up around them. He has no contact with them.
Apologetic
[rebelmouse-image 18357494 is_animated_gif=My mother-in-law was pretty clear she didn't like me. Would ask me racially charged questions about my family. Was passive aggressive when I was around. At our wedding she made comments to everyone about how she couldn't see why we were bothering to get married, and speculated that I was secretly pregnant.
Two years after we married, she sent me a birthday card. She acknowledged her lousy behavior and apologized. She said she realized I was a good person and a good choice for her son.
The courage it must have taken to apologize made her stock shoot right up. We've been aces ever since.
Facing Reality
[rebelmouse-image 18357495 is_animated_gif=My wife's parents made it clear from the beginning that I wasn't who "God intended" to end up with their daughter even after 4 years of us being together. So on October of 2015 I asked for her hand in marriage out of respect and I get a "We'll pray about it" then November comes and goes then December flies by and in January, I say f#$@ it and ask her anyway.
So my wife and I kept a secret for months until her mother and father were basically talking bad about me at dinner and she just blurts out that we're getting married in June..... In two months....I didn't know that since we hadn't set a date.
So this is where I get serious and find us a house and appliances. One day I'm struggling pushing the washer into our new home and here pulls up my future father-in-law and helps me put it in the house and even hooks it up. After that was said and done he asked if I truly loved his daughter to which I replied "isn't it obvious?" And that's when he hugged me and said welcome to the family. And that was it.
Don't be alarmed: There are some terrible corporations out there (looking at you, Nestle) but there are also some great brands that are selling decent products.
I know, surprising, right? Maybe we've all just gotten used to brands selling things of questionable quality that when we stumble across something worthwhile it stuns us.
Hold on tight when you find a brand deserving of your loyalty!
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor spwf asked the online community,
"What brand(s) do you swear by and why?"
"Their cast iron pans..."
"Lodge. Their cast iron pans are super durable and can last a lifetime."
StillForest989
Not just a lifetime. Your Lodge cast iron will outlive you, if (and even if you don’t) take care of it. Even if they get rusty they can be resurfaced. And damn is it satisfying to resurface a forgotten cast iron pan.
Asics, specifically the Gel-Nimbus series. I've suffered from joint pain and unbearable plantar fasciitis from a relatively young age... These shoes are life savers. Very pricey and I don't love the look of tennis shoes of any type but nevertheless I will praise these shoes to the end of days. Hopefully, I will always be able to afford them once a year.
Glad to hear you've found some much-needed relief!
"Warranty and service..."
"Victorinox. Excellent pocket knives, multi tools and their kitchen knives are probably the best ones you can get under 100 USD. Warranty and service is top notch."
CharacterComb3039
Anyone who cooks, but can't afford or doesn't want to invest in a professional-grade chef's knife should get a Victorinox. They aren't nearly as good as a top tier professional chef's knife, but they are night and day compared with everything else in their price range.
"This one brand..."
"This one brand of granola bars called Sunbelt Bakery. Every other granola bar brand is so dry I can't eat them anymore."
[deleted]
Yes, these are so good! An excellent choice.
"Very comfortable."
"Dickies. High quality pants. They're meant to be work pants so they're pretty durable and breathe well. Very comfortable."
GargantuanCake
"High quality" is right. Those pants last forever.
"It helps clean..."
"Dawn dishsoap. It helps clean dishes and it's great when one of my kids has an accident and I have to wash their clothes. Sometimes leaves a small stain but no smell. It has saved so many outfits."
[deleted]
Fantastic – it sounds like you should be their salesperson.
"They don't use..."
"New Balance. They don't use slave labor to make shoes."
Tink2013
They are comfortable and fit well.
I personally still don't like the aesthetics of many of their shoes, but still recommend them to people who want a good shoe.
"They are a retailer..."
"REI. Stand behind everything in their store. They are a retailer but you can beat something up they sell and they give you a full refund."
bigturkey1738
Many people use them for shoes, for camping gear... all kinds of stuff. They're very reliable.
"I wear my Timberland boots..."
"I wear my Timberland boots almost every day, I’ve had them for almost ten years, and they’re still just about as sturdy as they were the day I bought them."
RedWestern
These shoes tend to last forever. "Durable" is the perfect word.
"One large bottle..."
"Dr. Bronner's Castile soap. One large bottle lasts me about a year and I use it for everything. No toxic BS in them like pretty much every other soap and they smell fantastic."
"Also when I say everything I really mean it. All purpose cleaner, dish soap, body wash, shampoo, carpet extractor wash, dog shampoo, it’s called 18 in 1 for a reason."
drumkid74
If you're interested in the story behind the company, the documentary Dr. Bronner's Magic Soapbox might be right up your alley.
See? Not all brands are terrible. After reading about some of these, it might be time to change of your buying habits.
Have some suggestions of your own? Tell us more in the comments below!
You know what would be great?
If society could just stop with arbitrary dress codes. If you're not working with the public, why should you have to dress up so much? If you're a police officer, then it makes sense that you'd wear a uniform that identifies you as a police officer. If you're Ted from IT who sits in the backroom all day, I really don't see why you have to come in every day in a suit and tie.
Let's just toss them out, shall we?
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor Levels2ThisBrush asked the online community,
"What should be socially acceptable but isn't?"
"Leaving the office..."
"Leaving the office whenever you've finished your tasks for the day."
misringuette
This is why I'm so glad remote work is the new office.
"And yet, I get it!"
"Taking off sick from work, WITHOUT giving an invasive reason. I supervise a small team and so I see all the OOO emails, and for gods sake I want people to PLEASE not feel the need to explain in detail what kind of diarrhea is afflicting them, or how bad their period cramps are, or how much bad sushi they ate the night before. Just say “I’m under the weather, I won’t be online today.”"
"And yet, I get it! I do it too! I feel guilty or like I’ll be looked at with suspicion if my reason for taking off isn’t sufficiently debilitating enough!"
"But… we need to stop this. As a manager I don’t care, I don’t THINK the people above me who are also on these emails care… let’s just all agree to take sick days without any details from now on!"
imnotwallaceshawn
I do not miss my retail days where I had to organise someone to cover me and beg on bended knee.
"Cashiers or workers who don’t need to be standing all day not having a stool or chair."
Lavatories
Another thing I do not miss from my retail days. Having to stand for hours and hours only to come home with my feet killing me was not fun.
"Prices on apartments..."
"Prices on apartments and their respectable reasons for such price directly on their websites or advertising without the need for a tour or any secrecy."
Spiceinvader3124
I always assume if I have to ask the price I probably can’t afford it.
"Being quiet..."
"Being quiet/not wanting to engage in conversation all the time."
[deleted]
In Finland, if somebody tries to talk to you, they are probably a tourist.
"Choosing not to..."
"Choosing not to have toxic family members in your life."
[deleted]
It feels very liberating once you accept that you don't have to put up with it.
"Employees..."
"Employees calling customers out in public for being a**holes."
gameboy1001
Absolutely. Many customers get away with treating employees horribly because they know they can do it without any pushback... most of the time.
"The fact that I sometimes..."
"The fact that I sometimes need to take my insulin in public. No, Karen, I am not doing drugs, I need to live."
blubberwinx
You’re getting that sweet sweet insulin high… the high of being not-dead.
"Afternoon naps."
"Afternoon naps. I’m on team nap. Give me 25 minutes to charge up and I’ll give you back 3 hours of high quality work. Everyone wins. Plus I go home with extra energy instead of dead tired."
Governmentwatchlist
Short naps don't work for me. I can't do a 25 min recharge. When I take a nap it needs to be like a solid 2 hours
"Speak up!"
"Salary transparency. For some reason, in the US, there’s a taboo or stigma around discussing one’s salary. This should be done openly and freely, with zero embarrassment or judgment. The only winners from avoiding these conversations are the corporations that are able to pay people differently for the same roles. Speak up!"
Jumping_Bear
The "for some reason" you're referring to is simply propaganda on behalf of corporations.
It's evident that something's got to change around here, and we're mad as hell and we're not going to take it anymore!
Have some observations of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
As much as many of us don't like to disrupt the status quo, there is only so much time a person can tolerate a miserable situation before things become so unbearable that they ultimately have to peace out.
For some people, it takes a while for them to reach a breaking point. Eventually, there comes a time when they realize their self-worth is more important than continuing to please others who don't appreciate them for the sake of keeping up with appearances.
Curious to hear from people whose patience ran thin and made a strong decision, Reddit Prestigious-Order-62 asked:
"What made you say 'f'k this sh*t im out?'"
The unwarranted reprimanding was something that was never mentioned in the initial job description.
Feeling Criminal
"In the late 90’s."
"One time I got pulled into the Security office at a Department store I worked at. They accused me of constantly using the sales day coupons for people that didn’t present one (we always kept an extra copy at each register). I had watched my own department boss do it many times so I assumed it was okay. We didn’t even collect the coupons to be counted for the cash office, we just chucked them after use."
"They claimed I lost the store hundreds of dollars and had been watching me 'for months' do this awful, unforgivable crime for people spending 90 bucks on already bloated price designer jeans. I’m sure the occasional 10% discount was just devastating. 🙄""I got this huge lecture of how I was LITERALLY stealing from the store and they COULD call the police but would give me a chance to work off the damage. I couldn’t believe how criminal I was made to feel over it. The best part when they called my boss in who pretended to have never done it before to save her own a**."
"I asked if they were firing me. They said 'Yes and No. You will be let go, but you can choose to work off the damages so we don’t take you to court.' I told them I will just quit and asked for my last check. They said they will deduct what I owe from my last check. And I said 'Well then you need to show me all the footage and prove that I was stealing.' They wouldn’t produce footage, finally called the cops, and when the cops arrived, they were just as confused and called it an internal problem and advised them that this was overblown. I think they felt sorry for me. So finally upper management came in and just said 'just issue the last check, I will sign it here.' So much drama over so stupid a thing."
"It was sad because that actual day my Mom and daughter had come to the mall to meet me for lunch and I had to explain I just was forced to quit that job and was never allowed in that store again like I was some awful jerk."
"It was nice a few short years later, the entire chain bankrupted."
– Munich11
Power Trip
"A coworker waited until we were in front of a large group of people to start 'disciplining' me for something 'wrong' I did (I took my lunch 15 mins late to help another coworker) when she wasn’t even my supervisor. Applied for a job transfer the next day and couldn’t be happier where I am now."
– _shes_a_jar
Abusive Boss
"I had a piece of sh*t of a boss. He'd praise you in private but berate you in public. In front of coworkers and customers. Always about stuff that didn't matter."
"He'd also happily break company policy to side with customers after you spent an hour telling a customer you can't give them stuff for free, for example. Any time he was around, everything was miserable."
"My only regret is that I wasn't there to see him marched out by corporate when he got fired, because I had gone on to a better job by then."
– redisforever
Human Punching Bag
"I used to work in a Kitchen at a pub, it was grim work, but I had freinds there and had worked there for 3 years, So it wasn't too bad."
"One Christmas season we were being absolutely pumped, full out functions and busy services. My boss at the time was very stressed and fair enough, We were busy, We were all working overtime and full out. He used any excuse to completely blow up and absolutely scream at me for little to no reason, essentially him yelling at me was his stress relief. But fine, whatever, kitchens are rough places, no appolagies or anything, move on."
"I then go away for 3 weeks over the Christmas holidays and spend the time road tripping around the country having an amazing time."
"First shift back, not pleased being back, he makes a snarky comment."
"F'k this, Im out."
– Freddy54323
Even though these employees weren't chewed out in front of co-workers, the low salary without room for negotiation made them not wanting to stick around for much longer.
You Only Get One Job
"They cut my hours so I had to get a second job. 3 days before I was supposed to start said second job, my manager at the main job told me that I couldn't get this second job because I had main job first and I needed to make it my priority. That's when I said f'k you and left. I didn't even give a notice, I literally just sent an email saying I wouldn't be coming in the next day, grabbed my sh*t and went home."
– ginger_princess2009
Meager Wage
"I used to work Retail and after 7 years at the company, I found out I was only making 50 cents more an hour than someone who just started yesterday. I understood if they couldn't pay me more and asked for a good schedule. 7-3 or 8-4 every day and the same two days off every week. I didn't even ask for weekends off."
"I was told that they couldn't give me a good schedule so I quit."
– maybeashly
Situations weren't much different outside the work place. Social dilemmas prompted these Redditors to say, "nope."
Rude Reception
"Went to a pub because a friend kept asking. When I got there, he was with a group of people I didn't know, so I introduced myself and got the next round. As I come back with the tray, I hear them saying something along the lines of 'why is that b*tch still here? I thought she was just supposed to drop off a bicycle?' 'Ya, we don't want her to come to <this other town with more pubs> and now she is drinking with us?' 'She's so dumb' *proceeds to imitate and ridicule me as I was actively listening and nodding when I was having a conversation with my friend."
"Gave the beer to random people and walked right out after saying good evening to my friend and briefly explaining I did not appreciate being tricked into being a bicycle taxi for people who hate me directly after meeting me."
– ILikeLamas678
A Shocking Incident
"I was on my boat fishing for bass. I casted out my line and watched the lure hit the water but the line just floated in the air. Lightning and thunder crashed and the line fell to the water. F'k this sh*t, I'm out."
– fsh4fun051
Femme Fatale
"She lined my bed with broken glass put the blankets over it and I dove on in lol."
"Edit: She was violent/crazy and on drugs, was like the 20th attack I took and that made me really think lol."
– MyLifeForAuir1Ally For The Ex
"I found nudes of his ex (from ten years ago) that I’d previously asked him twice to get rid of tucked in a pair of MY socks. Our couples counselor asked why he’d kept them and he said, 'You know. In case I ever needed to blackmail her.' He said it like it was a perfectly normal and reasonable thing to plan to do. The therapist and I locked eyes and I noped the f'k out of there and moved out."
– Previous_Mood_3251
Most of these Redditors realized leaving their situation was better than dealing with the consequences of sticking around.
The latter is never a good option. Why remain in a scenario you know is already going to consume your soul?
The lesson for today is–Don't be miserable. Your sanity is worth saving.
Besides, you would never know that something better awaits if you just don't get the F out.As we enter into the summer months, people now have to decide whether or not they want their morning coffee to be hot or iced.
Lucky for them, it's delicious either way.
One could make an argument that foods that are equally delicious hot or cold are perhaps the best, or at least the most reliable.
And this can include foods which are not customarily sold both hot and cold (cold pizza anyone?).
Redditor NectarineOther4989 was curious to hear which foods people enjoy either hot or cold, leading them to ask:
"What is something that tastes good both hot and cold?"
Fresh out of the oven, or the next day!
"Cookies."- SuvenPan
Chocolate withstands all temperatrues
"Brownies."- Reasonable-Software2
Can't go wrong with fruit and pastry
"Pie."
"Apple pie."- Hak_Saw5000
This doesn't only apply to food
"Revenge."- pushthestartbutton
Let the flavor develop
"Banana bread."
"2 totally different flavors depending on warm vs cold from fridge."- nonkowledge
So many to choose from!
"Sandwiches."- Designer-Usual1691
A matter of textural preference
"Cheese, ya fools."- eat_dontpray_love
Under a hot greek sun, or during a cold winter's eve.
"Spanakopita."- mrsxpando
While there's no better smell than a batch of chocolate chip cookies fresh out of the oven, those eating them the next day likely aren't missing out either.