People Share Their Weirdest "Didn't See That Coming" Dating Experiences
Dating can be awkward, especially for the first few dates. Sometimes things can get downright weird though.
Reddit user u/Hammer-905 asked:
"What's the biggest, "Whoa, didn't see that coming" dating moment that you've had?"
Some responses have been edited for content, clarity, or profanity.
50.
I was having an amazing time talking to a guy I'd just met on tinder. He was sweet, funny, and lived about 5 minutes from me. He asked me out on a date, and I was ecstatic. The day comes, and he offers to come pick me up. I politely decline, and I decided to be honest with him and say I wasn't totally comfortable being picked up by someone I hadn't met quite yet, and that I'd rather meet him there myself. He seemed nice enough to take it well, I even told him it was based on a prior bad experience.
He absoultely freaked
I have never been called more names/things in my entire life. Distrusting, rude, nasty, ungrateful, the list went on. I didn't even fight him. Dude literally tried to evaluate my entire psyche, ranting and "explaining" what was wrong with me for not allowing him to pick me up, then blocked me. I've never seen someone take such a hard left turn into crazy town in my life.
49.
Went to a party with a guy. When I got there, he basically ignored me and flirted with some other chick most of the night. Later at night, they followed me to my car when I was getting something out of my trunk for the party. Guy shoves and locks me in my own goddam car trunk once I opened it. Can't find the latch, super drunk and terrified.
He's laughing hysterically outside the car, trying to use it as flirting fodder with the now horrified other girl. She's not a psychopath like him and helped me call someone with spare keys... I got out eventually, super embarrassing though.
48.
I dated a 22 year old who took her teeth out to eat an ice cream. Totally didn't see that coming and tried to make her feel comfortable.
I didn't keep seeing her for other reasons, but yes, I experienced the missing teeth that night.
47.
In college, my roommate and I moved a mutual friend into our place because his roommate had some mental health issues and was stalking him, and doing some really messed up stuff (like threatening to hurt himself unless friend hung out with him). I never met nor saw the roommate.
About a month later, I get asked out by this random guy on a dating website and it seemed fine, so we go out for pizza. As the date unfurls, it slowly becomes more and more awkward as the guy asks about my living situation, friends...roommates. The whole thing just feels awkward. We say our goodbyes and I go home, to tell my roommate about it...and then the lightbulb goes off - it was the stalker guy, trying to get info about him. There's actually a fair bit more to this story, but that's the basic scenario.
Edit: So, I had a couple of requests for additional details. To clarify, all of the characters in this story are guys (I'm gay, stalker is also, roommate/stalkee are straight). I'll parse them in as they happened:
-Probably part of the reason stalker got so infatuated with stalkee is that he was the first person stalker came out of the closet to and he reacted well (as stalker came from a very Catholic family). This was all about 15 years ago and attitudes towards LGBT people still weren't great, particularly in the red state in which we all lived.
-The night we moved him in to our house (under cover of darkness while stalker was away), the stalker had called him and told us he was attempting to commit suicide as a result...very slowly, by drinking salt water until he died of dehydration. Prior to that, stalker had spent a few hours driving around town trying to find stalkee's car. We were able to get some professional help for him that night.
-I have no idea how the guy found me, but sexuality probably plays a role - I'm a gay guy in a fairly small town and stalker knew that he had gay friends, so going through the online dating profiles/Facebook/Myspace at the time was probably not too hard for him.
-Stalker ended up harassing my friend a few more times over the years, showing up at his work to drop off important personal effects he had left behind during the move (e.g., a clothes hanger).
-Stalker showed up in my life a few times since then, too. A couple of years later, I was working for the college and he was running for a minor local political office. His political statement/declaration had him listed as a Ph.d. student in the department in which I worked (a fairly well-known program nationally).
Except, not only was he not a Ph.d. student with us, he (a) never completed his bachelor's degree and (b) was not enrolled as a student for several years. So you can imagine my surprise when one of our staff was like, "Who the hell is Stalker and why does he say he's in our program?" I do think this was just a coincidence, though.
46.
Met a guy while walking to work. It was dark out but not in a creepy way. We run into each other a few times and I ask him out. We go for dinner and he tells me about his work history, says he did something in construction for 15 years. I am 20 when this happened. Turned out we were both really bad at guessing age and he was in his forties and thought I was was in my late 20s. Luckily he could tell I was weirded out by it and didn't contact me after.
He sounds like a good guy. An age gap like that is just too large (in my opinion), and it is good of him that he respects you enough to leave you alone. Hopefully you can still greet him when you come across him during your walks, as the event is not something to be ashamed of for either parties.
45.
Went to a girl's house to meet her parents and they sit a teddy bear at the table, gave it food and drink.
She was the youngest in the house at 23 and the bear was such a recognized member of the family it had a Facebook page.
This will probably be buried but the weirdest part is when they would do voices for the bear and make me speak with it.
Edit: Family also hated me as they were super religious and i was born out of wedlock.
44.
Was casually dating a girl for 3 months or so, she suggests we watch some adult movies together - ok cool. So she puts a dvd on (this is 2008) and the second scene was HER. Totally unexpected. Was cool but I found it sort of an odd way to tell someone that.
She ended up beating me with a clothing rack pole... Man, Brooklyn was a fun place.
43.
I took a girl out on our first date. I guess she was trying to impress me because she rattled off the list of guys whose virginity she's taken. Spoken in a way suggestive that, if I played my cards right, something good may happen to me. I was not interested nor impressed.
Similar thing happened to me too. a girl I just met started telling me about taking virginity from a guy and laughed about how can someone be a virgin at that age (22). I was 23 at the time and yeah, still a virgin due to messed up past that made and still makes me feel unsafe in sexual situations. Then she told me that her last date left when she left to the bathroom and she wanted to make sure that I will still be here when she comes back from the toilet. I told her that I won't, she took it as a joke. It wasn't a joke.
42.
Might seem minor or silly but the first time my girlfriend didn't want to go bar hopping on a Friday she asked me if I was cool just coming over, drinking Miller Lite, and watching a Cops marathon. She specifically said it was a tased and confused special.
I never thought I'd hear a girl say that. We've been married for two years now.
Before Netflix and Chill, it was COPS marathon and Chill.
41.
On my first date with my current fiance, he told me that he has two older sisters that are both married to guys named Cody. guess what my name is?
Emma?
Yes.
It's Cody. So three siblings (2 girls and 1 boy) are all going to be married to men named Cody.
40.
So many great ones! I'll do this one since it has a few of those moments in them. I went out with this woman. She's really cool. Great first date, a lot in common, great connection. I reach out for a second date. I hear nothing from her.
Three months go by, I get a text from her out of the blue. She had to have a sudden surgery, so she didn't reach back because of that. We go out, we're still great. Third date, I'm stoked. I figure I'll impress her with one of these Academy films that's getting a lot of praise. Something called The Revenant. Whoops. Figured out what that was in the theater. Did not expect it to be so violent and graphic. And she was super squeamish about watching that stuff.
So we recover at a restaurant and we talk a little. At one point, we're making small talk and talking about our flaws. I say sometimes I feel like I can be a little selfish. I watched her starry eyes go cold and dead to me as I shattered all of her illusions of me. Her responses get quick and she gets quiet. I know exactly what's up. She lost interest instantly.
She gives me a ride back to my car and she just starts trying to figure out what's wrong with her for dating people like me. "Is it because you're an actor?" Then she sinks her head into her hands and says loudly for the quiet person she was, "why can't I date anyone normal!" Well, didn't see that coming. It was hilarious, but I didn't feel like it would be best to laugh there. So I politely ended the date and suggested that maybe we weren't as compatible as we thought. She reached out the next day to apologize and see if I wanted to give it another try. I replied, "Yeah, sure." I never heard back from her, as I now see that the way I phrased that has two interpretations.
39.
Coworker had a huge crush on me. Got my MSN messenger account (this was years ago) from another coworker. He started talking to me back and forth for maybe 2 weeks, and then asked me out on a date. That workplace actually encouraged in-office dating, it was in China so whatever. We went on four dates, each of them great, and then he confessed...he already had a girlfriend.
You know the saying: it's easier to get a job when you already have a job.
38.
Started dating a girl and she seemed nice but I wasn't sure she was into me. A few months in and she starts talking about future plans and marriage. I was happy as I was on board with that but it just seemed like some switch had been flipped. I had passed whatever tests needed to be done. I had made it. Skip to now, We're engaged and all is good. It was a strange transition though from "Hey I like this girl but I wonder how she feels?" To "Whoa! She's totally on board!" In a day or so.
Be careful friend. i just got out of a situation where it was "I love you see you tomorrow" to "We cant be together anymore" in a day or so.
I get it. This was a while ago though. I asked her about it later on and she explained it all. Mostly shyness. We're both very invested now. Making a life together is a big step but we're both leaving very solitary lifestyles so it's a two sided investment.
37.
One of my ex's practically disappeared. I couldn't figure out where she went or what happened to her until her dad called me and told me she didnt want ro see me anymore. We were both 21, and had been together a few years.
36.
My friend had one of these. Girl he had been dating a few weeks just flat out disappeared for a week. No calls nothing. Then she shows up and wants to keep dating. She claims she was in the hospital for a week for emergency surgery. Mmm ok.
Well my friend was getting handsy with her and they were taking their clothes off when he noticed she had no fresh surgical scars or anything like that and she claimed they had done a laparoscopic procedure on her abdomen. He calls her on it and she finally comes clean.
Turned out her and some idiot friends had decided to rob a convenience store with a fake gun. They got caught of course and she was now looking at felony robbery charges. I guess she was out on bond and was trying to pretend like nothing happened.
Yep he broke it off right there. Armed robbery tends to do that.
35.
We had a yellow-umbrella moment.
On our first solo date (first was a blind double date), we were talking about how we knew some of the same people. I think told him I had gone to a party that year where I was really drunk and a huge fight broke out between like 12 people at a house party on the front lawn. I saw some glasses on the ground so I held onto them so no one would step on them.
A guy then came up to me asking if I had seen some glasses his friend dropped. Turns out he had the same story about trying to break up a fight at a party and finding that his friend's glasses were picked up by some girl. We also had talked to the same people at the party, but at different times but never bumped into each other.
That guy is my husband now.
34.
Met a woman for dinner after chatting online for a few weeks. She's super cute, conversation is flowing well, really hitting it off. I'm talking with her about my work, how I get to meet all kinds of interesting people including a man who pulled me into a discussion about Bigfoot for 45 minutes that I couldn't tap out of.
Her reply? "I don't believe in Bigfoot, or aliens, ...or dinosaurs" I had heard of people that believe that the Earth is only 6000 years old and the Devil put the dinosaur bones here, but that was the first time I had met one in the wild.
33.
First time going to my now-fiance's apartment.
He had gotten drunk after a bad day at work. Not just drunk, but absolutely hammered. I drove him home, helped him up the three goddamn flights of stairs to his apartment, and opened the door. He apologized for the mess.
It was clean!
There were some cups and video game controllers on the coffee table, and a pair of pants on the couch. That was it. That was the mess. Other than that, the place was immaculate. It was well-decorated, organized, the carpet had been vacuumed recently, and it was full of really nice stuff!
He asked if I wanted to go to bed with him. (We hadn't had sex yet.) I told him he's too drunk to make good decisions. He said, "Oh...you're a good adult. I'm super drunk. Thanks for looking out for me." He wandered into the bedroom.
I waited a minute for him to come out and say goodbye, but he didn't. I went into the bedroom and found him laying in bed, flat on his back, snoring. So, like a good adult, I set a glass of water and a few Advil on his nightstand, left a note saying I'd pick him up and drive him to his car the next morning, and locked the door.
TL;DR - Impromptu trip to his place reveals a clean apartment; I turn down his advances because he's absolutely piss drunk; he sees my rejection as a good decision on my part. KEEPER
32.
I coached a young girls soccer team (6-7 yo) about 12 years ago. My assistant coach's wife was always super nice but never really caught my eye because she was much taller than me (5'11-5'8), and married. Ive never been secure enough to be attracted to or date a taller woman.
Fast forward to a few years ago. We're both divorced after our spouses cheated. We run into each other. We go on a friendly lunch date. Im blown away that i never noticed how beautiful and wonderful she is. We kiss in the parking lot with people laughing at us!
We now live together... ...and she is the most amazing woman I've ever met. Complete package. Sweet, kind, no games, fun, funny, beautiful, great job, my kids love her, etc. Never would have seen us together but glad Im now confident enough to date a taller woman. So glad I went on that "friend" date!
31.
Just before the second date with my now girlfriend.
She called me to let me know that she was feeling pretty sick (coming down from a migraine + bad cold) and didn't feel up to making the date.
She called me. When, after almost 1.5 years of plugging away at the online dating scene, pretty much all of the ladies I'd gone out with would just pop a text/message on POF/OKC my way.
The fact that she actually called and spoke to me almost shorted out my brain.
We've been together about 2.5 years, been living at the same place over 1.
30.
i never have chased love in the past couple years, had a lot of bad experiences and was tired of the outcome every time. met a girl through a mutual friend, she was really extroverted at first, i'm more of an introvert and prefer 1 on 1 time with someone rather than groups.
it was going pretty good for the first couple of weeks, i definitely had feelings for her, strong ones too. i always thought i was gonna live to be a hermit and alone by myself all my life.
that all changed when we went to walmart at 11 pm just cause she was craving frozen pizza. i never thought i'd be able to process having such big feelings for someone, but when i saw her in my sweatshirt and pajama pants walking out of walmart on a drizzly night holding a frozen pizza and looking like the happiest thing ever i just knew that was the one i want to spend my whole life with.
edit for clarification: we started "talking" about two weeks into knowing each other, dating after one month of "talking".
29.
Asked a girl on a date. She declined as she was busy but from the tone of her voice I guessed/hoped that maybe she would be interested.
So a few weeks later I ask again. She enthusiastically agrees. Awesome! Date, time, location all set.
About five minutes into the date she casually mentions the existence of her boyfriend. I had no idea. This was not a date, apparently. I hustled through that date, I mean, not-date.
28.
Went to a family party and was introduced to my cousins girlfriend. He's about 10 years younger than me and someone I used to babysit. At the party I reconnect with the cousin and he mentions we should go catch a movie together. His girlfriend hands me her phone to put my number in. A few months later she invites me to a movie and I say yes assuming this was the both of them.
Instead it turns out to just be her and she's definitely dressed for a date, tiny purse, heels and everything. I ask where my cousin is and it turns out he joined the military and shipped out and they decided they would both be open to other relationships while he was gone. I ended up watching the movie and having dinner with her but I didn't give any impression that this was a date. Her last effort was to offer to drive me to my car despite her car not being that far from where I was parked.
27.
Opened grindr. Saw a guy who looked pretty cute at first like 84 feet away. Realized it had to be one of my neighbors. Thought to avoid it. I had seen enough small town issues and didn't know if I liked the idea of seeing someone who lived that close to me on the app. He started messaging me though. "Wow. You're really close." We started talking. Found out he was actually my neighbor's brother.
He wanted to meet. I said sure, let's go for a walk. We met down the street and started on the walk. First thing he told me was that he was so high and that his brother was running a meth lab. I had to just be polite and try to get through the walk. I wanted to end it from the begining though.
Later his brother got raided and arrested right next door because another neighbor called the police after she heard a fight.
26.
Went on a tinder date a few years ago, he seemed really nice, we went on a few dates but each time he always said something odd. First date: 'Its cool that you goto the bathroom and leave your bag on the table with a complete stranger' Did not leave my bag unattended again. Second date: 'I didn't have a date for a family wedding, so I went with my cousin (nothing wrong with that I thought), we kissed practically all night, people looked at us alot'. Erm...
Just out of interest did this charming, cousin kissing individual manage to get a third date and if so did he have any more fun phrases for us?
Unfortunately, his charm and wit didn't persuade me enough to ask for a third date. Shame.
25.
Grew up in a military town in the south. I always told anyone who listened "I'll never ever date a soldier." And "I hate country boys, I'll never date one." So what does life do? Throws me a young man from South Georgia that was stationed in my town when I was in my first semester of college. I didn't see it coming because he was the exact opposite of what I ever envisioned myself dating, but I've been with him for over 3 years now, and he's the silliest and best person in my life.
Pretty sure my fiancee never expected to end with a country type guy like me. I'm probably about as far as you could get from what she expected to ended up marrying. She's a posh, artistic, British dancer, and I grew up in a one light town in the middle of nowhere. Tbh I never would've believed I'd end up with her either but I thank my lucky stars every morning that I have.
24.
Casually flirted with a girl for 1-2 months, asked her out, she said yes. On the way to the bar she makes a highly suggestive comment about how she would look in a very sexy dress we see in a store. I think to myself "this is going great". We enter the bar, sit down, things turn around just like that as 1 minute in the conversation she grows completely cold and says "I'm at a stage in my life where i do not want to date anyone".
After 20 seconds dead silent, i replied "Then what the hell are you doing here with me, on a date?". Can't remember the answer but it was something nor here nor there. And it wasn't one of those FWB things. Finished my drink, escorted her to the meeting point, never heard from her again.
Maybe it isn't one of those "Whoa" moments, but the switch from "really cute girl, shows signs she's into me, this could be something great" to completely and utterly cold definitely caught me by surprise.
23.
Went on a date. It seemed to go well. Set up a second date. Dude cancels on me because he wanted to pursue someone else. Alright, fine, whatever. Then three months later sends me a friend request on facebook. I accepted because I was curious. He hasn't attempted to message me or comment on anything. I'm so confused.
Dude is playing the long con. Knows a reasonable person would think its ridiculous to try after that, so he's not. Instead he is biding his time and looking for an angle to make it more "natural"... Either that or he thought you were really hot and was hoping you'd have some vacation bikini pics on your profile... Either way he must have missed out on your obviously superior hotness.
22.
When I was in high school, I was a hostess at a restaurant, and there was a cute busboy I worked with. Eventually he made a move and kissed me after work, and we started casually seeing each other.
One day after work, he pulled out his phone and flipped it open (good old mid 2000s!) and his wallpaper was a photo of a baby. I asked if that was his little sibling and he said "nah, that's my son."
The busboy was only a year older than me, so I was really shocked. He told me that he still tried to get along with his son's mother, but she'd cheated on him so it was hard. My dumb seventeen-year-old ass was like, "yep, I can do it. I can be a stepmom!"
Then I found out he was actually still dating his baby's mother. I let him know that I knew, and he begged me to give him a chance; he said he'd break up with her, that she was really awful, that I could "change his life". I just instant messaged him, "I'm going to block you now," and then did so. Probably the most self-possessed I've ever been with a romantic partner, lollllll.
Kudos on being capable of such a sensible reaction at an age when many of us did stuuuupid crap in the name of love.
21.
I've posted about it before, but I approached my now wife entirely as a joke. My buddy was down, and I thought it'd cheer him up to get a laugh. I don't have much luck with women, I am quiet and nerdy and not much to look at. So I picked out a pretty blonde girl at the college cafeteria and decided to go hit on her. Usually I would never but I was a little buzzed from the night before and thought it'd be funny.
I figured she would tell me to f**k off and it would be hilarious. Just a brutal public shut down that I, to be totally fair, deserved entirely.
We talked for a few minutes. She was very nice. I stopped short of asking her on a date, so I guess it was just wildly unprovoked small talk.
Anyway. Ya. We had a class that semester, and with the ice broken I just talked to her like a normal person.
We have two kids now.
Did not see that coming.
20.
About 9 years ago I was talking to 2 guys called Angus on online dating. One of them asked me out and we agree to meet at a coffee shop the next week. When I get there I see him and he is waiting tables so I walk up to him and he gives me this look like he knows me. He asks me "table for one?" and, extremely confused at this stage, I reply "umm table for two?"
So I follow him and sit down at the table and he goes to get water and I'm thinking of all the ways I can explain how I'm really unimpressed that he would invite me to the place he works while he's working for our date. As I'm deep in this thought I see someone else approaching my table and it's...the other Angus (let's call him Angus 1). Angus 1 and I had unknowingly organised a date to the place the other Angus (Angus 2) worked and then I'd seen Angus 2 and confused my Angus' and assumed I was meeting Angus 2.
So Angus 1 and Angus 2 arrive at my table at the same time. Angus 1 says "Hi it's me Angus 1 from (generic online dating website)". At this point I can see in Angus 2's face that he's figured out where he knows me from, then he takes in what Angus 1 has said and then gives me a look that literally says "what is this girls weird obsession with guys called Angus!"
To make things worse Angus 2 was a very attentive waiter who checked on us frequently and got to hear the awkwardness that is the first date from an online dating website conversation all while poor Angus 1 had no idea what was happening and probably recounts this story as a date he had with an extremely awkward girl who's weirdly shy and doesn't like to talk in front of waiters.
In hindsight I wish back then I had the confidence to tell Angus 1 what was happening and laugh about it but it didn't happen! Needless to say I never heard from either Angus again.
19.
The summer before I went to college, I ran into an ex at a party and we ended up having a night together.
Sitting in class taking notes a few months later, I get a facebook message from the ex. "I'm pregnant".
Well, now I'm freaking out. I was already seeing someone new, really didn't want a life with this girl, and had just started college. I wasn't ready for a kid. I started prodding a bit, like "what do you plan to do" and "have you told anyone else?", and she gave all the answers I didn't want to hear. Family knew, she was keeping it, etc.
This dragged on all day. I'm freaking out, trying to figure out what the hell I'm going to do about it.
Then, late that night, she mentions she's still in the first trimester.
That doesn't add up, I haven't seen her in like 5 months.
That's when she finally mentions that her new BF knocked her up and she just needed someone to talk to about it, and figured letting me think it was mine was the proper way to go about it.
Never shared another word with her.
18.
Went on a date with a man. Seemed really decent, and I liked him. But then he ghosts me for a weekend. I was super confused, and finally said screw it.
He text me on Monday morning to explain. Told me he has a daughter, who is 2, and he had her for the weekend. Okay, cool, whatever. I like kids.
But then he tells me he's living with a girl that he WAS dating, so I can't come to his house, ever. And the daughter wasn't from her. It's from a co-worker that he had an affair with, so that's why he kept it all from me.
We went on a couple more dates, but then he let me know that he was still with baby mama on the side, and he wanted to try a relationship with her. I said good bye and don't talk me to again.
Less than a year later, they're married, new baby, and guess who is texting me to be his side piece?
17.
Was talking to a friend of mine, just hanging out in the garage. I had been slowly falling for her for a little while before this so one day I just said screw it, told her how I felt. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. She told me she felt the same way so I went in for a kiss.
This girl straight up mounted me.
We've been married for almost a year and I couldn't be happier. Life is dope.
16.
Met this girl in college. She sat in front of me, so we'd chat from time to time. Semester is coming to an end, and I decide to ask her out. We go get dinner after class, just to get to know each other. As we're at dinner, she starts talking about her kids. plural. This has never been brought up before. I ask about their father(s). She explains it's by the same guy. I ask if it was planned. She responds "Nah, his pullout game is just weak". I pause, and let this sink in. So it happened not once, but twice? ok. I ask about contraception. "It's against my religion, and what kind of example would I set as a youth pastor?"
There was no second date.
15.
This was almost three years ago now. I met a girl online, went on a first date, hit it off pretty well. She invited me to come over her house a few days later as she was gonna have a few friends over. I show up, find out that it's actually the birthday party of one of her friends, a little weird, but okay .
She was from the Ukraine, and everyone who showed up was from Russia or Ukraine, or their significant others. There was a also child. Basically like being invited to a family BBQ as the second date, and by the way, OptimusPyne is the one in charge of grilling for everyone.
At one point one of her friends did the basic, "How'd you guys meet/ how long have you been seeing each other". I told her, she said "It must have gone pretty well". I could only respond with "I guess so?".
Everyone wanted well done burgers. Nice people though.
14.
Dating a guy who was so nice I wasn't sure it could work because I'm kind of abrasive when it comes to dealing with things(not a fan of bs in general..i.e.my people skills suck) and I had dated my fair share of people who seemed nice and turned into nightmares. Anyway, he tells me he loves me after the second time we've slept together.
Had no idea it was coming, super worried because the too early confessions of love are usually a red flag. I tell him it's too soon and I only say that stuff if I know for sure I mean it. Fast forward to now, we're married and it's the healthiest relationship I've ever had in my life, not a red flag at all. Just an extremely genuine person who knew his own heart.
It was one of those rare times in life that everything just fell into place. Our schedules matched up, we never ran out of things to talk about, he was and is this singularly kind individual. By the time we actually had bumps, we were so close we just kinda fell into this routine of facing each problem side by side and solving it together. I've been married once before, for eight years of chaos and abuse. I know what dysfunctional dynamics look like. This time around, my husband is like shelter in a storm. What they say is actually completely true. There's nothing like the adventure of finding the right person.
13.
I went to fourth date with a girl..
Ended up seeing her whole family, and slept overnight there.. also helped with farm stuff at morning a bit(i liked it btw)my non-confident ass really did not see that coming.
Not to mention, she called me her boyfriend also.
12.
Background information: When my abusive ex boyfriend and I broke up I was basically packing up everything he gave/let me borrow over our 3.5 years together (3 items total, only wanted one back) to give him the next day with my now boyfriend (the man who gave me the confidence to leave). While packing I realized that my 'promise' ring, that I actually sorta begged for, was on my hand. I LOVED this ring, not for sentimental reasons but because I personally picked it out and it was basically my dream wedding band. I loved this ring so much I broke down crying, it almost physically hurt me enough to get rid of it and my now boyfriend was very aware of this.
The morning my boyfriend picked me up he had a bunch of rings on his hands when he normally ever wore one. I questioned why and he simply stated that the normal ring he wears to work, where he handles food, it's the only one that doesn't slip off. This was only the second time we hung out together so I didn't think to much of it. I had work later that afternoon so naturally he dropped me off. While waiting for my shift to start, sitting in his Jeep, he lays his hands flat out in his steering wheel and says to me,
"Until I can buy you an actual ring you can wear any of mine, take it and it's yours."
He fully planned ahead that he was going to give me one of his rings to wear so he wore them all so I could pick my favorite. I'm still in 'awe' at how sweet it was.
11.
When I was 19 I worked at Buckle in a mall, a few times this gorgeous girl came in. Second time I recognized her as soon as she walked in, let me reiterate, B-E-A-Utiful and I decided I could not let this opportunity pass. Mind you, I am not great looking, average at best. But I attempted to shrug off doubt and talk to her. The moment we started talking, I realized that not only is she one of the prettiest girls I'd laid eyes on, she was intelligent and witty, I was stuck by this even more so than her looks! We talked and she told me she works in Hollister.
Soooo not long after, I made my mind up I was going to do something out of character and stroll right into Hollister and ask her if she'd talk her lunch with me later so we could talk and get to know each other. She agreed cheerfully and told me that 2 days from then would work best since it was a full shift. I was electrified, I was so fricking happy I practically skipped through the mall back to buckle! I probably had a sh*t eating grin for days. I had never really put my self out there and absolutely felt that she was out of my league. So this was exhilarating to say the least.
The next day on the way in to work, she was out side smoking I said hello, we chatted and we went to work. The next day all is well, she texted me, we planned a time and we followed through.
So the break starts:
She asks "Hey do you wanna go smoke really quick?"
I said "Sure, why not."
So we went out and each smoked 1, then went in to go get a bite to eat. We are standing in line, she looks a little pale,.
I asked "Hey, is everything okay?"
She replied "Oh yeah, I just feel a little light headed"
She preceded to tell me "I don't really smoke often and rarely a whole one, I saw you smoking the other day so I figured that I would ask you to go smoke"
Laughing I told her that I only agreed because I saw her smoking and that I really only smoke with other people, if at all.
We got our food, sat down... As soon as we did, her eyes got HUGE, she covered her mouth with her hands and puked. Not just like a little mouthful, she puked. I may have wasted a literal second, but I got up quick and got handfuls of paper towels to clean up. She was mortified and I could tell. I tried to let her know that I really didn't care, stuff happens and I just tried to be relaxed about it.
She cleaned herself up, our breaks were over and we went back to work. She never responded to my texts, avoided me in the mall, and we never spoke again.
I have to say though, for that very short time I knew her, I really liked her personally and found her immensely charming. But alas, I guess it was fated to never be.
So let this be a warning, don't smoke before you eat. Hell, just don't smoke and you'll be fine. Also, I have the worst luck ever with dating.
Maybe one day we'll meet again and I'll have a real shot! But I doubt that possibility.
10.
The moment where I realized that the girl I'd been hanging out with off and on for about 3 months thought we'd been dating the whole time. She was a great person, but I had no romantic feelings toward her and I'd just been hanging out with her as a friend. Apparently she thought we'd been dating. Yikes.
I've been the girl in this situation. It sucked. :(
Yeah, I definitely felt really bad for her, and I basically just apologized profusely for not catching on. :(
09.
I had been dating this girl for a couple years before she moved in with me. She got fired for no-showing there months later, began wildly stealing my credit card to use it, got angry and abusive (emotionally and physically) when she learned I cancelled the card. She stated she refused to look for a job because I am "supposed" to take care of her, do all housework, and everything while she played WoW. That was the first and last time she hit me. Threw her as out that minute.
Prior to moving in, she seemed ambitious, hard working, responsible, incredibly nice but according to her parents, that's only when she's living alone. This flip happened every time she moved in with a guy or her family.
08.
Was secretly dating this girl for a few months as she wanted to keep it low profile and not reveal to anyone yet. 1 day, a guy i knew was telling me how much he fancied her until he found out she was engaged, and the wedding was in the summer. The secrecy all made sense now but what made it awkward was that i had actually met her husband-to-be a few times, we're not friends or anything and he's a really nice guy but he was absolutely clueless about it.
07.
I was dating a girl for almost three years. She had a pretty serious alcohol offense (DUI + accident) before we met. About a year in to our relationship, she was finally sentenced to a alcohol program. This specific county within this midwest state do not mess around with DUIs and is a VERY strict program. I was living a half hour away at the time. I thought she just had made a mistake before and the county just threw the book at her. I didn't realize she had a drinking problem. She couldn't stay sober and they put her in a halfway house. Even in the halfway house she was hiding it. (She did not drink around me and I had no idea). She became friends with other people in the halfway house.
I was halfway across the country visiting my sister and I received a call from her roommate from the halfway house. Her roommate told me that she had slept with her boyfriend and my girlfriend the night before. She was telling me this because she was angry thinking that her boyfriend was giving more attention to my girlfriend than her during the threesome. Halfway across the country getting that call- ouch
06.
After 11 months of casual friendship my crush told me she had been crushing on me for 8 of those 11 months. Been together for 5 months now and couldn't be happier about life.
05.
Having dinner, it's going good, we are laughing I am ordering more drinks. Suddenly guy pulls up a chair sits down and introduces himself, and she goes pale. He's like "you're not going to tell him your married and you have two kids?"
I'm like so I think this is my cue to get out, I just walked away, she called me later that night if I could go pick her up from her house and give her a ride.
04.
Long distance ex gf told me she was very sick and probably wouldn't live for very long. Of course 15 year old me was very distraught but after a long talk we decided to call it quits and she disappeared off of all social media shortly after. Earlier this year I found her very much alive on Instagram. She even messaged me and played dumb. I was really fucking shook up for a while.
03.
I dated my ex for 3 years. Met the parents, did some traveling, grandma gave us her blessing, yada yada. We both thought we had it on lock... We broke up in March 2016. It was a hard break up, very similar to the experiences I'd held my friends through.
What blew my mind the most, though, was when I had a panic attack as the realization hit me that I just wouldn't be with him anymore, but the life we planned together was gone too. It was so confusing to have the next decade planned, then actually starting to look for places by myself for the next week. The uncertainty hurt more than leaving his side, and I never saw that coming. Maybe I knew all along that he wasn't the one. IDK.
02.
Uh I didn't even know I was going on a date. So a friend from college invited me to go to the club/bar with him with a few of our college friends. After much convincing I say yes since it's been a while since I've seen them all. I arrive at the club and text him to come out so he can show me the way to the table. We get there and it's just him and I. So I ask where everybody else is at. He goes on to tell me that they all had something come up and couldn't make it.
Anyways i can't just bail and leave so I get a drunk and he gets a few drinks. Now, he's really shy, but the alcohol made him a non-stop talker and goes on to tell me that he wants us to be roommates and move across the state to start our careers tells me that we could be living in the city and have the time of our lives. Anyways so it's time to leave and I get in my car and he hops on too, and he's drunk so I can't let him drive. So I take him to a taco truck he eats and I drive him back to his car.
He gets out and asks for a hug, I hug him and then he asks for another hug and leans in for a kiss, and I dodge it and he hugs me tighter. And then I finally leave. Never again do I wanna go out with him. He ended up asking me to go out with him again a year and a half later. Clearly he didn't get the memo
01.
Okay so, I might try to summarise it xD Just second year of my degree, trying to fit in and get to know people around the campus I meet this girl; black, really curly hair, shy at first but as chatty as someone can be when you get to know her. We are both interested in art, so we start a club together, hang out and all. I have to admit I have kind of a crush in her, but here it comes, I find out she is ace (No sexual attraction) and prefers girls. No probs, she is a great friend!
Two years later we are real close friends; go everywhere, hang together often, we know pretty much about about and support each other. We keep running and even have built an awesome art community around our first club, met a lot of awesome people along the way... Well, you know, just life. One day just joking, I have these pajama pants whose waistband has gone loose and constantly fall, so I tell her something along "Damn, you're so hot my pants drop on their own". She immediately answered flirting. And not joking but REAL flirting.
I'm surprised but play along, and we spend the next two weeks or so like that, flirting back and forth. We asked each other out, like, one night after going out with some friends, at the same time, and we have been dating for the last eight months. So yeah, like, I couldn't have seen it coming at all, but I am really happy we both took the step! Ah, and we literally skipped through the get-to-know-each-other phase.
How do you handle the ace thing? I am curious.
Well, seems like she discovered she is demisexual instead (Means that only feels sexual attraction if already feels emotional attraction). In many ways for me it was like meeting a new person in her, and I feel like she discovered many things about herself as well in these past months, so I'll be fully supporting her.
That's very nice man. A new journey for you two. Hugs for you both.
Adults Who Still Need A Stuffed Animal To Go To Sleep Share Their Experiences
Reddit user Old-Horse1185 asked: '34 percent of adults sleep with a stuffed animal or other sentimental object. Are you one of these people? What do you sleep with?'
Stuffies, plushies, stuffed animals, or plush toys; whatever you might call them, we likely all can remember a fluffy friend we had in our childhood.
But some adults might have carried their childhood friend into adulthood, or even made others along the way, and they might even still go to sleep with them at night, too.
Redditor Old-Horse1185 asked:
"34 percent of adults sleep with a stuffed animal or other sentimental objects."
"Are you one of these people? What do you sleep with?"
The Twin Bond
"My twin sister died when I was 18. Ten years later, I still sleep with her unicorn pillow pet, she gets a nice spot on the bed, and I'd never be with someone who made me feel bad about having it. Only my girlfriend is trusted enough to give pillow pet a bath."
- insomniacinsanity
"My twin brother died when we were seven, and I used to have a specific stuffie that was given to him by an American lady who worked in the hospital he was in, but it got damaged in a house move when I was a teenager and was unsalvageable."
"It was a limited-run stuffie that you could only get in a specific American store in the 90s, so it was basically irreplaceable. My husband, 10+ years later and without letting on, tracked one down and paid a silly amount of money to have it shipped to the UK and gave it to me for Christmas a couple of years ago."
"I sleep with it every d**n night. I'm mid-30s, and I'll never stop."
- beesandsids
Keeping Them Close
"My partner passed away a few weeks ago, and I now cuddle his shirts that still have his scent. When my son spends the night with his grandparents, I also cuddle w his blanket or the pillow he sleeps on."
- anonmomanonnin
Cuddles and Fidgets
"My grandma made me a pillow when I was born. She sewed the pillow together and the pillow case, which had kittens all over it."
"I’m 33 years now she passed when I was 31, and I sleep with the same pillow in my arms every night."
"The pillow case is worn to bits because I guess I use it as a fidget thing I rub in between my fingers. Yes, I’m weird."
- Valuable_Panda_4228
From the Beyond
"I bought my wife a big stuffed seal for our first Valentine's Day. This seal has a slight green tint to it, so we named him Sealo Green. She had Sealo for a couple of years before she passed away."
"I hug Seal-o every night and pray to my wife, tell her about my day, things coming up, etc. I'll start using her perfume on Sealo soon, so I can smell her while I pray to her. My heart can't take it right now."
- Cubbycupcake-Uther
A Gift from Grandma
"I am one. My grandma gave all the grandkids a cat plush. A cat food brand had a promotion, if you bought enough cat food you'd get a free plushie. With 14 grandkids, a lot of food was bought to get there. Her cats didn't complain though, lol (laughing out loud)."
"I still sleep with it, it's a feeling of comfort, safety, and home."
- DavyJonesLocker2
An Evolving Friendship
"Stuffed dog I've had since my mom was squeezing him while giving birth to me. That dog has seen some s**t."
"He's a 'Sad Sam,' and his eyes used to break my heart when I was a kid, so I buried him under other stuffed animals or made him face the wall so I wouldn't have to look at him."
"Then I felt really guilty because I didn't want him to feel punished when all he wanted was to be loved. So I've been sleeping with him for almost 40 years now."
"I recently bought an original one off eBay to see the comparison and man, I have loved the daylights out of that dog!"
- dumdadumdumAHHH
A Special Bond
"I now sleep with my girlfriend's stuffed bunny she has had since birth. He’s my best friend now! I love you, Bootstin!!"
- silversauce
"Aww, that's awesome. My partner is the only person I've ever been with who didn't make me feel like crap for still having my blanket. When I travel, I leave it with them, and I think they probably cuddle up with it as much as I do after a rough day."
- the_Ozz
Keeping a Partner Close
"Sometimes when I take a nap and my wife doesn't, I'll take her pillow to sleep with because I like the smell."
"It smells like baby powder, vanilla, and her."
- TrailerParkPrepper
Very Considerate
"Huge jellycat bears. I don’t even wanna, but I’m just afraid I’ll hurt their feelings if I don’t."
- CommonAd9606
"As a kid, I routinely slept with a zillion stuffed animals on the bed because I didn’t want any of them to feel left out."
- PumaGranite
"As a kid? I'm 26 and still have to hug them all as I go to sleep or they'll feel left out!"
- Scymber
Lower Back Pain
"I sleep with a body pillow (plain cover). Doctor recommended it a few years ago to help with my lower back pain and it really does help."
- HappyTimeHollis
"I sleep with a body pillow but it's an alligator. My grandparents gave it to me when I was 11 years old. It has a huge open mouth you can put your arm through or use to prop your phone. Had it 24 years. Love it to death."
- smoretank
Full Body Support
"Squishmallows. I have sciatica and they're great for when I go to bed. I put one between my knees at night (side sleeper) and I snuggle up with one."
- Raging_Utahn
Happy Kitty, Sleepy Kitty
"I'm not one to sleep with plushies, but my cat likes to snuggle up to me and sleep with his fluffy little head on my shoulder."
- imaybeacatIRL
"Cats have to count. My previous cat actually slept as the little spoon, snuggled in my arms."
- disapprovingfox
The Long-Distance Relationship
"I am a guy, I recently got to sleep with a stuffed animal for a week, I won't go into the details as to why or how, just know that I lovvveeeed it. I would get called a weirdo if I confess to this to the world, so I have kept this to myself and my bestie only."
"The stuffed animal was a large teddy bear, since then it has been taken away and now it is placed in the living room, my bedroom has one small stuffed toy that I sleep with, it's not super large and not as comfortable as the teddy but it works."
"It makes me feel good and less alone, the closest person in the world to me is 700km away, what I'm about to say is weird but hugging the teddy and pretending it's her makes me calm and makes me want to sleep."
- uninformed-but-smart
Build a Friend... with IKEA
"Ikea Hippo, Ikea Elephant. The Ikea bigs are the superior sleep companion. I also have the shark, but he is not right for my shoulder when cuddling so he guards."
- pm-me-neckbeards
"I also keep my Ikea shark on guard at night! The Ikea octopus is the guard when I sleep at my boyfriend’s house."
- jeff-buckleys-teeth
A Comfort Become Real
"When I was a toddler, I got a stuffed animal as a present from my uncle. It was a light brown rabbit with button eyes and ears with rainbow stripes on the inside. I'm unsure of when I got it, but I was either one to two years old or four years old."
"I don't know how or why, but it had a distinct scent, not particularly noticeable unless you shoved your face in its fur, like I did, haha. As I grew up, I needed to have this rabbit with me or I would not be able to sleep. I remember this one time when I couldn't find it in time for bed, and I was so distressed trying to fall asleep that I started hallucinating."
"Over time she lost an eye, her ears became frayed, her fur fell out in patches, and she looks like a well-loved creature (because she is) or hot garbage, depending on who you ask."
" Even in my rebellious teen years, I couldn't pretend to dislike her because the scent and texture of her fur gave me a feeling of comfort and safety, even when it felt like everyone was against me."
"I live by myself now at age 34 and you better believe I still keep her in my bed. The scent is gone but sometimes I can trick my brain into thinking it's still there, and when I touch the texture of her fur, I will still get a wave of comfort and reassurance the same way I did as a child."
"It's amazing not only how humans will bond with anything, but also the effect these things will have on a person."
"This got sappy, my apologies."
"PS: Her name is Ninni."
- Mwuuh
"'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.'"
"I'm reminded of this quote from 'The Velveteen Rabbit.'"
- tinycole2971
While everyone might feel a little silly about their sleeping arrangements, most of those who still sleep with a cuddly friend have spent a great deal of their life with their companion already.
From sentimental reasons to physical needs, everyone needs comforted from time to time, and there's nothing quite like the unconditional love of a favorite stuffie friend.
Working remotely from home certainly has its advantages, including not having to endure traffic and deal with coworker drama.
But many people found that during the pandemic, the isolation of working from home left little to be desired.
People who have jobs requiring them to commute every day and arrive at the workplace are given the opportunity to be social and feel like they're a part of society.
But being a part of a work environment can come with its own unique occupational hazards.
Curious to hear from strangers in the workforce, Redditor AMGBOI69420 asked:
"What’s the most f'ked up thing you’ve seen at work?"
People in medical professions draw on their endless list of shocking events.
The Crazy Patient
"I was sorting all the psych patients that were hospitalized in my state, and got to this guy: a teenager or maybe a bit older, and he got sent to the ward because he suddenly got aggressive and started to have some episodes that he squirmed in pain/took off his clothes and things like that. Before being hospitalized he was complaining about these things, but nothing the medics did was working and nothing wrong was found, so it should be a psychiatric issue, no?"
"Wrong, he was put in the ward for 2 or so years and lost a lot of his life, being considered insane, because he developed a rare spinal cancer that was hard to detect and caused him extreme pain. Really f'ked up, I don't remember what happened to him afterward, but I not really optimistic that it had an happy ending."
– vtomal
The First Aid Officer Who Couldn't Unsee These
"I was a first aid officer in a corporate job."
"Elderly pedestrian hit by a car in our car park: compound tib fib fracture that tore through her calf muscle"
"Deep laceration with arterial bleeding after some idiot from another department tripped and dropped a metal first aid down a flight of stairs during a fire drill."
– W2ttsy
Patient Left Against Medical Advice
"Patient comes in to the ER, gets full sepsis workup. His chemistries are all f'ked up, he required a manual white cell count because his was so high the analyzer basically said 'WTF?!', his urine was full of white cells and bacteria. You know, your classic 'old person UTI that's gone septic.' We figure he's going to be admitted. Nope, they send him home. Mind you, this was not a case of 'patient left AMA (against medical advice),' this was just the doctor said 'Yeah, seems like you've got a UTI. Go home and drink some cranberry juice.'"
"Two days later, the same patient comes in, with the same complaint. Gets the same blood and urine tests. While I'm doing the manual white cell count, the phone rings. It's the reference lab down the street. The blood cultures on the patient I'm currently working on from two days prior have come up positive. I take the notification and call the ER to let them know. Us labbies figure he's going to be admitted for sure this time. Come to find out, they sent him home again. (Again, not an AMA, a 'Go home and drink some cranberry juice.')"
– coffeeblossom
Those in customer service share their shocking eye-witness accounts.
Trailblazer
"I worked at one of the busiest Walmarts in the country during Spring Break for 6 years... I wouldn't even know where to begin."
"I guess the drunk lady leaving the bathroom with her pants around her ankles while actively sh*tting as she walked across the front of the building and back outside into the wild."
"None of the workers wanted to deal with it so they parked a shopping cart over each turd until the cleaning crew came in."
– UncleGrako
Slimy Salespeople
"Worked at a Nissan dealership where most salespeople where slimy POS. One senior citizen with a veteran ballcap was working on a deal for a car for his grandkid. Nice old guy got tired and fell asleep in the chair waiting for the salesguy to work out the deal with the sales managers. One of the managers from the bullpen walks by and farts right in the sleeping old mans face then runs back to the bullpen where everyone was watching and laughing. It was disgusting, I told the sales guy who I knew was a Iraq vet. He went to the bull pen and screamed in the face of every single one of those f'kers. He screamed so much at them I thought he was gonna pass out."
– adrielago
Work environments can be extremely dangerous.
"Once saw someone step into a bucket of hot fryer oil, it got into their shoes and everything. Was so bad that when they took the shoe off it peeled of skin with it. The person had 2nd and I believe 3rd degree burns. He never came back but I saw the pictures and it was horrific."
– Mrlionscruff
"I worked at a printing manufacturer and saw something like this happen in person, the guy had his right arm shredded. The wrench in his other hand stopping the machine is the only reason he didn't go all the way through. Later that month a 2400lbs paper roll was dropped on a coworker in front of me. I'm glad to be out of that job."
– Beullersghost
Threatening The Employee
"I worked at a Goodwill for a few years, we had lots of drug addicts trying to shoot up in the changing room and had an occasional OD."
"But the most shocking thing I experienced was the amount of times people physically threatened or attacked me or my co-workers when we refused their donations. Getting in our faces and trying to push us around, one guy tried to hit someone with a car. Another one threw a picture frame that narrowly missed smashing my supervisor's head, another threw such a temper tantrum that he smashed an entire set of chairs and a kitchen table."
"There was also someone who called the police because we changed the prices on soft-cover books."
– carefulwithyrbananas
T.M.I.
"Saw one guy drop dead (office job)"
"One get an arm cut off (Pulp mill)"
"One get de-gloved (Paper mill)"
"But the winner was the day we walked into work at an auto parts store and found the assistant manager f'king another assistant manager. Just going at it."
– Bigdaddyjlove1
Mechanical Nightmare
"Box cutting job saw a guy die after losing his arm to the machine. I still to this day dont know how my room mate at the time kept going to work for another few weeks before quitting."
"We'd go to work stoned off our a**es everyday. And seeing that guy die was a nope for me. I knew it was far to easy for the same mistake to happen to me stoned. Wasn't gonna get sucked in and die for 15 bucks an hr."
"Any heavy machinery related jobs since Ive made sure to ask about work related accidents and how common they are along with when the last one happened."
– idontneedjug
When I was a parade performer at certain theme park, we performed on a day when it was reportedly record-breaking heat, and some of my fellow performers who were dancing atop a couple of the floats collapsed and passed out from heat stroke in view of guests.
It was the scariest thing to see several paramedics bursting onto the scene and taking these unconscious young performers being carried away in stretchers.
Since then, the park instituted a code-90 protocol where the choreography was modified whenever the temperature hit 90 degrees.
Be it desperation, self-indulgence, or simply optimism, many people never leave home without a condom.
If the chances of "getting lucky" are much more likely at some places than others, one never knows where or when they might hit it off with someone.
Including a funeral.
Bizarre and tasteless as that sounds, a recent study reportedly showed that 1 in 8 men under the age of 35 do, in fact, bring condoms with them when attending a funeral, "just in case".
Whether or not these condoms were used, however, is another story entirely.
"After a recent study found 1 in 8 men under 35 admit to taking condoms to funerals "just in case", what's your experience with this?"
Select Crowd...
"I went to my grandma's funeral and hit it off with this hot nurse."
"Things were going great until my brother pulled me aside and said it was my second cousin."
'You know who shows up at funerals for old people? "
"Family members."- bumblef**kglobal
"I remember seeing a really hot chick at my grandmother's funeral."
"Immediately thought was I should chat her up."
"Then my brain went to, 'What if she's family and we just never met?'"
"I just went back to mourning."- VideoGameDana
Okay then...
"Once I was dating a girl whose dad absolutely forbid us from dating."
"Like, would lock his daughter in her room and take her phone to make sure we did not communicate."
"She told me when we spoke for a moment at Starbucks that she would date me if her dad was out of the picture."
"He died is a car crash on the freeway, and since her mom liked me invited me to the funeral."
"My girl and I sat next to each other at the funeral and couldn't wait, got it on in the parking lot of the funeral home."
"Condom was necessary."- crunchysquare
car studio GIF by ZI ItalyGiphyNever The Funeral, Always The Wake
"Ngl, some of the best parties I’ve been to have been wakes."
"In no way disrespectful, they were a celebration of the person’s life and also a massive tension release after grimness of the funeral itself."
"So I’m not surprised some people take a condom just in case."
"I’ve never done it, but I didn’t often expect to get laid regardless of situation."- Goryokaku
Oops...
"Proudly in the 7 out of 8 camp."
"But the 1 in 8 aren’t wrong."
"Heard through the family grapevine that one of my female cousins met a dude at a funeral and they banged it out the same night."
"Also turns out they were related (what’re the odds at the funeral of a relative? )."
"Distant enough they would never see each other again (different branches of her family), close enough that their family photo albums have overlapping people."- ESQBOJaguar
If You Really Think About It...
"Biologically speaking mourning/death triggers mating instincts as though that death tells the lizard brain in us that we need to procreate because death is scary."
"Scum'ically speaking, funerals typically leave people especially women in a state of fragility that leaves them vulnerable to suggestion and coercion."
"Socially speaking, some people, both men and women, seek comfort and company after/during a mourning period and when two people engage in comforting each other emotionally through a death it can trigger chemicals in the brain that cause the idea of connection or chemistry which can inevitably lead to copulation."- KURO-K1SH1
Season 18 Episode 3 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphyBetter Safe Than Sorry!
"If you forget to bring a condom you increase the chance of casual sex with 10.000%."
"It’s a well-known fact."- Mukkeman
Not Just Men...
"I'm not a man and I've taken condoms 'just in case' pretty much anywhere."
"I've told folks to take condoms 'just in case' to a festival who I was sure would never have a one night stand and who I had never even seen mingle with any man/woman."
"It's a safety."
"The thing costs less than a dollar, but if anything somehow would happen, not having it could cost you your healthiness or independence/freedom due to a child being your new responsibility."
"Unless you absolutely, 100% am sure you will not be having sex that day, and no one will be able to change your mind - carry a condom."
"And having visited a funeral is likely not impactful enough to everyone to make them absolutely sure of that."-deterministic_lynx
It Is, Indeed, A Source Of Comfort...
"I'm a woman, but I'm going to point out that grief affects everyone differently."
"Some people get an intense need for sex when they are grieving, I speak from experience here."
"Perhaps they're carrying them everywhere already, but choosing to take some specifically to a funeral makes perfect sense to me."- Sexy-Snowflake
"My bf's son died, and his sex drive was significantly higher around that time period, I think it's just a way men deal with stress."- Arielxxxlee
"There is no 'wrong' way to grieve."- Noctudeit
Sexy Ava Gardner GIF by Turner Classic MoviesGiphyAlways Listen To Your Mother...
"When I turned 15 my mom told me to always have a condom in my wallet just in case."
"That was before people realized it was really bad to keep it in your wallet."
"So yeah I’ve been pretty much everywhere with one 'just in case'."- euphoria110
If It's Already There, Why Take It Out?
"I do too."
"I'm not going to remove the random condom that is in my wallet just because I'm going to a funeral."
"Not that I ever needed one, I'm still a virgin BTW."- azarbi
When One Life Ends, Another Begins...
"I’ve heard that the proximity of death increases the desire to make new life."
"Anecdotally, my FIL and MIL met at a funeral and 9 months later my husband was born."- KerouacsGirlfriend
Lionel Messi Hug GIF by FC BarcelonaGiphyNot SPECIFICALLY Funerals...
"We bring condoms everywhere, 'just in case', not only the funeral, you silly!"- WeetIkVeelNL
No one should be judged if they happen to have a condom with them when attending a funeral.
After all, should the moment arise, better to be prepared and safe.
On the other hand, if any of these people are attending the funeral with the intention of "getting lucky", that's just... yeah...
The Best Real-Life Examples Of 'Never Interrupt An Enemy While They're Making A Mistake'
People will trip themselves up eventually.
Because liars and lunatics always make mistakes.
They may be small mistakes, but they leave just enough room to expose their wicked ways.
Sure we all want to fight off an enemy and be the victor.
But sometimes the victor's greatest weapon is nothing but a little patience.
Then, we celebrate with a smile as we watch the crumble.
And maybe we have a little victory dance.
Redditor Spinksy48 wanted to understand the fun of letting your opponent lose by just doing nothing, so they asked:
"What is your 'never interrupt an enemy while they are making a mistake' moment?"
If the story starts to get really crazy, just wait for a break.
Then ask a question from the beginning.
I guarantee you know more of the lie than they do.
Just keep talking, friend.
Gotcha
Dashcam Hello GIF by TranscendGiphy"I let the lady who changed lanes into me run her mouth about how I rear-ended her before pulling the cop aside to show him my DashCam footage."
ThrowingChicken
A Cherry Wave
"I was accused by a neighbor of reversing out of my drive and hitting his car. He gave me the date and time I had allegedly done it and pointed to a (small) scrape on my car that supposedly matched perfectly the location of the dent on his. This was 7 weeks after the alleged event, by the way."
"I said it wasn't me but told him to contact his insurance and we'd see what they said. A few weeks later I get a letter from my insurance asking what had happened, to which I responded with the date I had bought my car (and updated my insurance) - two weeks after the supposed bump."
"He never spoke to me again but I used to give him a cheery wave every time I saw him glowering at his window."
Gazcobain
Speak Once
"In a meeting with my project manager who has not been in the office or worked a proper full day for MONTHS, she has increasingly been annoyed by people bypassing her to get things done by telling me and her other direct reports what to do."
"I was about to answer a question for stakeholders, and she told me to let her speak one sentence and will let me have my bit. I did as I was told, and she told the stakeholder a completely wrong thing about the system we were handling and made a complete fool out of herself. She got sacked this month."
choiaera
We Hated Each Other
"Guy stole a presentation from me, this is 25 years ago. We hated each other. When he started presenting I realized I had made a huge error, didn’t say anything. Let him get through it. Asked him about the error, but he couldn’t answer. This was in front of COO. Got fired, not for just that, he was an overall douche. This was before everyone was on PCs, and had one printer in one room."
Bmilvis
Whoops
Office Space GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy"When a coworker who I hated got fired a few weeks after I decided to stop fixing his mistakes even if it impacted a client."
Hrekires
It's always thrilling to see the bad colleagues go!
Bye. Bye. Bye.
I will see you on the 15th
Idiot Reaction GIFGiphy"Not my story, but several years ago my older brother was fighting for custody of his son with his ex-wife. As the first custody hearing date approached, they were exchanging [un]pleasantries over text and my brother ended up saying something along the lines of, 'I'm not continuing this conversation. I will see you on the 15th.' The ex-wife told him, 'The hearing is on the 25th dumba**.'"
"So of course instead of correcting her, my brother just allowed her to keep thinking it was the wrong date, and she missed the first hearing entirely. It became the first of many mistakes she made in the court system that eventually led to my brother and the woman who is now his second wife winning full custody of his son."
Damn_Furries
Follow the Prints
"I'm working on a job site and the architect is there one day. I've been given some light fixtures for the sconces in a leasing office lobby. The fixtures are meant to be hung from a ceiling, they can't be installed on a wall. I attempt to convey this to the architect, but he brushes me off and just tells me to follow the prints."
"I turn to the apprentice and say, well you heard the man, put them up. A bit later, we hear the crashing of glass. The architect asks what was that? I said your light fixture. As I picked up a broom and dustpan to go clean up."
Ohhhhhhthehumanity
No Debt
"As I was being fired from a job, the district manager requested we record the conversation. He thought I was gonna be very upset, so I obliged. Then when he started to tell me why I was being fired he started with, 'You are gonna be graduating college soon, and we want to make sure we get ahead of you leaving us.'"
"I very calmly asked him to send me the recording right after he said that. Then later that day I called a lawyer. I now have no student loan debt."
JRTHEAMAZING
The Screams
"I reminded my ex-wife the divorce court was the next day and was invited to Get F**ked. So I went by myself, she failed to appear and pissed off the Judge so he asked what would be my desired outcome for assets and Custody of the kids. He wrote down whatever I wanted and I could hear her screams when she read the Orders from 3500km away."
comfortablynumb15
Silence
"There's a thing in law enforcement/legalese called a spontaneous utterance. Many many people will bury their own cases with these while bi*ching and moaning at their arresting officer on the way to jail."
raccoonsonbicycles
That last one is good knowledge to have in the back pocket.