No matter who we love.... our significant others, or agents, our clients, fans or loved ones... it's never enough! And artists need the validation. That validation will help change the world. We're all trapped in moments but when we're most lucid we can change humanity! We should never fear the things we believe in; especially if it leads to progress.....
Redditor u/spankthewhitewhale wanted to unburden a few feelings by asking.... What comes across as selfish but actually isn't?
Damn Age!
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Acknowledging that you don't have the power/resources to care for a loved one and seeking help from a nursing home or adult protective services.
Dementia is no joke and it can slowly kill the souls of the family as well as the person suffering from the disease. Caregiver burnout can lead to psychoses, heart attacks, strokes, and suicide. These diseases can cause sufferers to become abusive and violent. The commercial ideal of the well-kept grandma who occasionally forgets things is so, so far from the truth for many families.
It's sad and causes so much guilt and anguish, but that's the reality we must live with. okapistripes
HELP!!!
This may be a weird one, but not "letting people help" when I did not request help, and offers of help were politely declined. TerribleAttitude
No. Just no!
Telling your family "no" when you feel you have maxed out your contribution to whatever cause they are campaigning. Especially when their methods of negotiation include applying guilt. onetimerone
No Co-Workers!
Healthy firm relationship boundaries. riendlyantisocial
My co-worker thinks "Good morning, how are you?" is an invitation to a 20 minute conversation. I get in, I get my coffee, I start my computer, I get settled. If I let her go at it, I wouldn't start working til almost 10 am. She gets put-out when I say, whatever. I just started and I was friendly the first week to get to know people. I just want to start my day without talking to anyone, I'm not really that friendly. NotMyHersheyBar
You're #1!
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Limiting contact with a friend whose issues are now affecting your own happiness. You have to look out for yourself, too. opebirmingham
Mr. Shue?!
In high school one of the students in year 12 died and his friends were selling bracelets(I think) to raise money for his funeral. I couldn't afford one (they were like 10 dollars) as I was in year 9 and jobless without spare money. Anyway a lot of people were upset with me because I didn't have a bracelet for someone I didn't know and money I didn't have. arest7
You got this!!
Saying no to people. you don't have to always help people if it will spread you too thin. Self preservation is a thing. rngtrtl
I wish my Dad had given me the following advice earlier:
Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm. Jazehiah
I think I'm alone now!
Solitude.
Sometimes it's insanely healthy to be with yourself.
Sometimes the timing doesn't mesh with others' lives. StanFitch
Sometimes 'Family" has to go!
Cutting off toxic family members/in-laws. I have cut my narcissistic abusive sister out of my life and I am in the process of cutting off my mother-in-law. Life is too short to allow abuse into your life because your abuser is a family member. Needlesstosa
Never involve Money!
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Not giving money to family members. My longtime gf's family always asked her for money and I had to reassure it is okay not to give it because we have our own bills. BTW between the both of us her mom, brother, and sister have received money at one point in time. I am almost positive she has paid them more than I know, not my money, but they try to guilt us because we are in a better situation (we save a little after bills) and will never pay us back. HeyyJosh
Seek Treatment...
Not catering to someone who says they'll kill themselves if you leave them. They're the selfish one for trying to put that mess on you, and you owe it to yourself not to break down over it. PonchiBear
If someone says they will kill themselves if you leave them, you actually need to leave them as soon as possible. That sort of person is totally manipulative. ididntshootmyeyeout
I'm not your funny!
I don't think it's selfish, but a lot of people in my life think it is. I'm a recovering alcoholic and I really don't care that my friends still drink, I just ask them not to talk to me if they're drinking because it's hard on me. I have gone off on some "friends" and actually straight up cut some people out of my life that think it's funny to drunk text me and send me pictures of alcohol and stuff because I'm the "drunk" of the group.
Nope. Screw you. You're blocked until you're sober and you apologize for being rude as hell. I'm not putting my sobriety at risk for your drunken laughs. sickbutterygnar
The Sound of Silence...
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To my family apparently, just sitting contently in silence. Apparently I'm rude for not wanting to join in their inane conversations. ThatBritishPleb
This is the issue my partners family has with me. I'll gladly talk if I feel there's something I can contribute but I'm perfectly content with just sitting in silence whilst they have their own conversation. underclassamigo
Think first.... family later.
Being in your mid 20's and having no kids/not wanting kids. I'm still a kid. I don't have my spending habits under control. I love time to myself and silence. You think I'm selfish because I acknowledge I'm not ready to have kids and understand I'd be bringing a child into the world that I'd struggle to support? Once I'm financially stable and further on in life, sure. But the whole routine of kids having kids needs to stop. Sort your life out, then think about starting a family. FredDroppedCornbread
These balls are mine!
Not giving a baseball to a kid at a game. I've never caught a ball at a game in my life and it's something I've always wanted to do. Granted I'm absolutely not gonna shove some kid aside to get it but if I caught it I shouldn't be shamed and guilted into just giving it away. Sauce_McDog
Separate Check Please!
You know that thing where you go out to dinner with a bunch of people, everybody orders expensive stuff and wine and desert, but you just order an inexpensive salad? Then the bill comes, and they decide to split it, and say you owe $235 for your inexpensive salad?
Yeah, f**k that.
Me: "Hey, guys, I ordered a $10 salad, I'm not paying $235." I guess that is not really selfish, just sticking up for yourself. What co-diner would be pissed if you said this? None. So, what I am saying, if this ever happens to you, speak up and don't go with the program. No one will judge you.
Source: Happened to me once. Once.
So, for you youngsters, they say you should learn from others' mistakes? Learn this one.
And, make double-damn sure you ask up front if you are paying your own way, or splitting equally, when you are first asked to go. That way, you can pass. That's the other thing I learned and do. "Hey, is this a pay your own way, or split equal deal? I'm a light eater and don't want to pay $235 for a $12 salad." That's what you say. In a joking way, but makes the point.
This is if you're not going out for some important meeting with your boss' boss' boss. Or something like that. That's a different situation. Man_with_lions_head
Pop it somewhere else!
Not buying overpriced popcorn from Boy Scouts. I still do and respect the kid coming to my door but you shouldn't be allowed to use kids in a situation where companies make money. I'd rather just give you cash. At least Girl Scout cookies are 6 bucks. sharpshooter88
No is the best word!
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Saying no.
I used to say yes whenever somebody needed me or needed something from me. After going through a few events where I desperately needed somebody to be there for me in the same way (and nobody was), I realized running myself until I'm dead tired trying help and please others isn't worth it.
I don't have to hang out with people I don't want to. I don't have to rearrange my schedule to swap a shift with my coworker who has poor life planning skills. I don't have to pet sit for you even though you know I have nothing else going on that weekend. Last but not least, I'm not going to be a last minute add on to your vacation because your other friend backed out and you can't find somebody else to go.
No excuses necessary, the word "no" is enough. People act like this is some mind boggling thing and it's somehow rude. casualcat96
I'm just signing the card...
Not wanting to contribute to the leaving gift for a coworker that you barely knew. Dharmsara
I'm OK with contributing for a gift for a co worker I don't know well, but I get along with. But, I'm not OK with being asked for a contribution if they are leaving the same week I start. thatdarnnumber117
Save yourself first....
This may get buried but I just had to end my marriage of 9 years due to my partner's addiction. I was losing myself in their descent and spiral and I couldn't take it any more. It's still really fresh and really painful (and actually today is our anniversary) but it's what I need to do for myself to keep myself alive. I need to trust they will find their way without me and I'll find my way too. Thanks for reading. needathneed
None of us are perfect pr Saints amongst us. We all do the best we can. What things have you all done that came off more selfish? Though you KNOW you were being your best self!
Redditor Pooky135790 wanted to know:
"What are the best adult jokes that are hidden in kids movies?"
These scenes really had us rolling.
Shrek definitely has a few innuendos.
"In Shrek talking about Snow White:"
"'Although she lives with 7 other men, she's not easy.'"
"Gets me every time!"
- Sregge
"The whole Duloc opening scene with the singing puppets. 'Please keep off of the grass, shine your shoes, wipe your…….face.'"
"Also in Shrek: when they get to Farquuad's castle, they note the large size of it, and Shrek asks if Farquuad is compensating for something."
"This joke is great because everyone can laugh at it."
"Kids will think it's a joke about his height."
"Adults will think it's a joke about his other kind of height."
Lord Farquaad Ok GIF by PeacockTVGiphyCars had plenty of jokes.
"In Cars when the two Miata ladies flash their pop-ups at McQueen"
"I didn't realize for years that that was the connotation."
"Look at that scene again and look at the photographers behind Mia."
"It took me a second but I think the one directly in the middle is zooming in on their posteriors lmfao."
- -Paint
lightning mcqueen car GIF by Disney PixarGiphy"Also the Piston Cup. 'He did what in his cup?!' Funny enough 10 year old me got that and my dad didn't."
"Also in Cars, when Mack is driving down the highway and wants to pull over into a truck stop to rest, the sign at the truck stop says 'Top Down Truck Stop, All Convertible Waitresses.'"
Robots had it's fair share of moments.
"In Robots the [father of the] main character and his wife get the parts for their robot child and exclaim, 'Making the baby's the fun part!'"
"Also the old lady bot, Aunt Fanny, has a lot of junk in her trunk."
Oh, Ratatouille.
"There is that one scene from Ratatouille, when Linguini is about to confess about how Remy is in his hat cooking for him, and says 'I... have... a little... tiny...' and right after he says tiny, Collette quickly glances down at his pants. I never even noticed it until someone pointed it out to me because it is pretty subtle and can be easy to miss."
"Seriously the best dick joke in a kid's movie."
"That and the time when the short lil chef guy catches linguini in the pantry and says, 'One can become to familiar with vegetables, you know!'"
ratatouille flirting GIF by Disney PixarGiphyCoco really went there!
"In Coco, everybody laughs when they say Hector died 'choking on chorizo.'"
"'Choking on chorizo' is Mexican slang for sucking d*ck."
"I mean the song Hector sings to his dying friend has the implied, but not spoken, lyrics: 'And her tits they drag on the floor...' (he says 'knuckles' but the guy shouts, 'those aren't the words!')."
- TerH2
What a forgotten gem Monster House was.
"Monster House."
"'That's it's uvula!' 'Oh.... So it's a girl house....'"
"Rick and Morty gets a lot of hate around here because of the sh*tty fan base, but Dan Harmon is a genuinely funny writer."
"Could not BELIEVE Dan Harmon was a writer on this 'til I googled Monster House; your point is a good one lol."
Even in Frozen.
"'Foot size doesn't matter' - when Anna from Frozen talks about her fiancé."
"Frozen 2, 'I like you better in leather anyway' when Kristoff dresses up for Anna at the end."
"My boyfriend and roommate and I all watched it and all three of us spat our drinks at that and we all did the 'Did we just hear what we think we heard?' look. Then we laughed for like 10 solid minutes."
Not a movie, but still good.
"There was an episode of Dexter's laboratory where the father kept going on about Dexter's mother's muffin, and saying he only married her for her muffin. The whole episode was filled with innuendo."
"'Your father is a muffin fiend, a muff-o-maniac, just the aroma can make him crazy.' Lol. Had to see it for myself."
"Season 2 ep 18 The Muffin King."
"There was the episode about DeeDee and Dexter having decoder rings! DeeDee says Dexter's club is for big 'I-D-K-S-C' Dexter decodes it, gasps, and says he's gonna tell mom. Lol."
Whispering French GIFGiphyChildren's shows may be for kids entertainment, but they're created by adults. No doubt they're going to slip in a few naughty jokes here and there.
Time to re-watch some old favorites and see what we missed when we were younger.
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As it turns out, there are a lot of universal fears out there. And the people of Reddit have a thing or two to say. Suck it, Roosevelt. WowADeadMidget asked:
What's your biggest fear?
I haven’t even started this article yet, and I’m already sweating. Let’s dive in.
That would keep me awake too.
“Drowning, getting stuck in some tight place and asphyxiating/dying of hunger in there, or getting steamed to death.
That's pretty much the shared 1st place."
“I'm 34 years old and was very close to drowning last year. Got dumped out of a canoe and was pinned against a tree in a current. I pulled myself out and it took about every bit of upper body strength I had, didn't even really realize the severity of it while it was happening because if my head had stayed under I was done for. A person of smaller stature would have been in very serious trouble in the same situation. I think about it a lot too, usually when I'm trying to go to sleep lol."
A valid fear.
Snl GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy“I choked on a piece of steak home alone a few months ago and had to give myself the Heimlich maneuver. It took 3 tries. I'll never forget my dog staring at me and the thought of my girlfriend coming home to find me dead on the floor of our apartment.
Now I think about that every time I eat by myself. So choking to death alone is my greatest fear."
This is heartbreaking.
“Biggest fear is losing everything I have worked so hard for later in life. I watched my parents work hard do everything right build wealth and then almost towards their 50s my father got sick, lost his job. And now struggle to make ends they had to sell anything that had any value to them.
Now they just go through life with seemingly little enjoyment because they had everything set and in a blink of an eye it was gone and probably never come back.”
This is why you should check in with your friends.
“Being one of those people who dies alone in their home and doesn't get found for weeks or more because they have no one who cares enough to notice they're not around anymore.”
“There was an old man in our vicinity who died like this. Apparently he died on the toilet and been there for weeks in the summer heat with closed windows and doors so the smell was also not noticable to the neighbours. The firemen and policemen brought the body down from the flat in two bags apparently it was already falling into several pieces.
The smell was lingering in the apartment for a few days, one of my friends lives two floors down and he said it was unbearable.”
Let’s go deeper, shall we? Sorry in advance.
Good advice.
Will Smith Memory GIF by STARZGiphy“Memory loss!!! Literally, everything I know in my life is memories.”
“When I started to have memory problems, it super freaked me out. Now it's a little easier. I surround myself with trusted people and write everything down. Memory is important, but if you take care of yourself and find ways to keep them externally it can help a lot. Memory books, notes, friends.”
Spooky.
“Deep water or caves with no light that you have to crawl to get through. So a cave full of water would be the worst.
That or what happened to that guy who was repairing an industrial bread oven when it turned on and he couldn't switch it back off from the inside.”
I’m sorry, WHAT???
“Rabies.
You're fine one moment, and then the next day you have a headache. Turns out you got infected on that camping trip six years ago and it's been hiding in you ever since.
Now that you have a headache, it's in your brain and you're already dead. There's next to nothing doctors can do except put you in a coma and say a prayer, but odds are nearly 100% that if you do survive that you're a vegetable or nearly one.
You experience incredible pain, irrational hydrophobia, manic behavioral changes, and a total loss of motor control near the end. It's got to be one of the most humiliating, dehumanizing and terrifying ways to go, and it can happen just like that.
Rabies is terrifying.”
If that last one didn’t shake you, these next few will. Read at your own risk.
All we can do is stay optimistic.
heaven gate GIF by South Park Giphy“Not being alive anymore - the finality.
I'm not afraid of dying - the act of it, anyway. I'm not afraid of what comes next - I've not bothered myself with that one.
What I'm afraid of is being… done. Here one day, then gone. Not able to do anything else.
I cannot out it into better words, that's how suffocating the anxiety of being gone is for me. Maybe it would be better if I were religious and believed in an after life, but the best I can do is convince myself that I believe your personal energy spreads to other beautiful things in life when you pass. But the mind, the mind just being… done. That is truly frightening to me.”
Don’t watch the latest Purge movie.
“Societal collapse. A climate or economic or disease-based destruction of society as we know it. Every part of normal life ceasing to exist, and every person having to fend for themselves. There's a documentary called 'Collapse' that scared the crap out of me."
"An even more frightening thought is that collapse is already happening, and we just don't have the perspective to recognize it. After the collapse of Rome, people living in Roman territories still considered themselves Romans for a long time, even though the Roman state was gone. Granted, things happen a lot more quickly in the modern world, and that in and of itself is concerning - the rate of change is ever-increasing. What happens to any system that encounters increasingly rapid changes? What happens to an airplane or a bridge or a human being whose rate of change keeps accelerating? They spin out of control until failure.
Climate change is a potentially civilization-ending event amongst several other candidates for bringing about our doom. Nobody has bothered to fix it yet, and even with more mundane problems, I feel that the government has already abandoned us. Just like some poor farmers five hundred miles away from the city of Rome, we cannot hope for the state to come and save us once things break down - they'll be too busy enjoying the last of their feasts, orgies, or taxpayer-funded drugs before the lights go out."
A parent’s worst nightmare.
“The thought of anything/anyone hurting or something seriously bad happening to my daughter.
I once heard someone say that having a child is like taking a piece of your heart and letting it walk around outside of your body.
That’s exactly what it feels like. I don't care for much things, but I would be nothing but an empty shell without her.”
Alright, now that you’ve read all of that, go drink some water and take a nap. It was a doozy.
Now I’m thinking about societal collapse. Great.