
People Share Their Most Embarrassing And Worst Dating Nightmare Stories
[rebelmouse-image 18356640 is_animated_gif=Dating is rough, there's no other way to say it. We don't know a single person who has dated that hasn't had at least one "wtf is happening in my life?" kind of date. One Reddit user asked:
What's your single worst experience on a date?
The responses had us laughing til we cried, crying til we laughed and cringing like you wouldn't believe... so clearly we need to take you on this emotional roller coaster with us. Here are our 20 favorite replies.
1. Go-Karts With Friends
[rebelmouse-image 18356643 is_animated_gif=I asked a girl on a date. She said sure. We agreed on the details, I'll pick her up at 4pm, then we can do go karts at the local speed way. Unbeknownst to me, she invited 2 of her friends. Since I was a spineless 19 year old at the time, I couldn't assert myself to tell her friend not to smoke in my car, and also that I don't want to pay for their go-karting. Ended up paying around $300 for all 4 of us to go race, but my "date" had to stop at the 3rd lap because she crashed with some stranger.
2. "Drying Up"
[rebelmouse-image 18356644 is_animated_gif=When I was 29, a guy told me (15 mins into a first date and with complete sincerity) that I'd better start having kids soon because I was "drying up."
3. Half Drunk In A Torn Dress
[rebelmouse-image 18356645 is_animated_gif=So I met this girl on tinder. She seemed nice enough at the time and I was sorta new to this whole tinder thing so I must admit the red flags slipped right past me.
She rocked up half drunk in a torn dress. Now I'm not one to judge people's lifestyles and I was starving so for some reason I decided to press on with the date.
Bad decision.
I spent the next three hours listening to her moan about her current boyfriend and how he was such a controlling guy because he wouldn't let her go out on one on one "catch ups" with guys at bars.
When I finally came to my senses and told her that I didn't particularly want to be on a date with a girl who was seeing someone, she threw her drink at me and accuses me of assaulting her. Thankfully, the bartender had been watching the entire series of events and took my side on it.
She got thrown out and I didn't go on a tinder date for the next few months
4. Scared Of The Dark
[rebelmouse-image 18356646 is_animated_gif=I took a girl hiking. We got there a little before midday, but we paced slow because of the trail and stopped to eat a lot. To cut to the point, we took longer than expected. She was apparently afraid of the dark, running around and telling me that we were going to die. Not the best experience. I basically had to push her along the trail, taking about an hour or two before we finally got back to my car, where she promptly thanked me for "such a good time." Yeah.
5. "He took one look at me..."
[rebelmouse-image 18356502 is_animated_gif=Not sure this counts since the date didn't actually happen but I was setup on a blind date. We planned to meet at a restaurant.
I got there first and since it was a nice day out I sat down on a bench outside the restaurant. He ended up calling me on his way over and I told him where I was sitting. He was still on the phone when he started walking up to the building. He took one look at me, hung up the phone and walked back to his car.
I tried to call him back thinking something must have happened and he didn't answer. No more answers to calls or texts afterward.
6. PLOT TWIST: They're still together and he's about to propose!
[rebelmouse-image 18356648 is_animated_gif=I met a girl.
A total 10 to me in every way. Great potential from the get go.... I wanted to have an amazing first date because I've always tried to make them memorable (after all they'll be talked about forever if you end up together).
I wanted to keep it simple, nothing tooo crazy, but she liked coffee.
So my plan was basically to take her downtown and we would walk in the beautiful snowfall from coffee shop to coffee shop trying them all until we agreed on the best one!
So I go to pick her up. I arrive at her apartment, and i pull up to the front door. She's not there.
I message her and she says she doesn't see my car. We have a back and forth before I zoom out on my map and realize there is an identical apartment across the street, mirror image. So her screenshot she had sent me looked the same but was backwards.
[X] Late
She hops in and we start to chat, and I feel my pocket for my wallet and realize it's not on my person.
[X] Forgot wallet
Drive 20 minutes home and search. Not there.
[X] Lost Wallet
Drive to parents house (10 min) because I might have left it there, my parents get to meet a girl I haven't even taken on a first date left. No wallet.
[X] Awkward Parental Encounter
Realize I might have left it at the house I was building (I work construction). Drive 10 min. It's there! And I get to impress her with my craftsmanship on the house. Finally a plus!
[X] Over An Hour Late For Date
Head downtown. All the coffee shops are now closed.
[X] Plan Blown.
Time to improvise, I'll take her to a bar/burger joint downtown. Get in there, we had both eaten dinner, neither are hungry... we order a side of fries.
[X] Awkwardly Small Meal.
She's a month away from 21. We just have waters.
[X] Awkward Drink Situation
Meal cost $4.
[X] I Feel Cheap
I take her to the fanciest ice cream place in town to make up for all of this. It too is closed.
[X] -_-
Decide fuck it. We need ice cream so we walk into the grocery store to get some. She runs into her roommate who wonders how the date is going. I walk off to get supplies and this girl explains how bad it is so far. I get ice cream!!
[X] Weird Roommate Encounter.
Need plastic spoons, I can't fuck that up right?
[X] Wrong
grabs box of plastic forks
[X] wut.
So we drive out, park in a parking lot and eat this ice cream with forks because the whole date has gone to shit. We chat and chat and forget about the ice cream.....
....until I lift up the box and it's melted all over the console of the vehicle.
[X] Melted Ice Cream All Over The Car.
So we clean it up; finish chatting and I drop her off. No second date surely.
[X] Nightmare Over.
Until she texts me "that was the worst first date I've ever been on..."
"....but I loved every second of it. When can we hang out again?"
I was over the moon!
And then my car ran out of gas a block from her place so she picked me up, drove me to a gas station, I bought and filled up a gas can and then returned home.
[X] One Last F-Up
7. Getting Kicked Out
[rebelmouse-image 18347524 is_animated_gif=Chick asked me to go to the movies.
Right before I leave my house she tells me that three of her friends were also coming.
I get there and she tells me to just sneak into the theatre that they snuck into.
We all get kicked out.
9. Puke
[rebelmouse-image 18356649 is_animated_gif=I threw up on to their shoes and then continued to drink more.
10. He Wasn't Ready
[rebelmouse-image 18356651 is_animated_gif=It was less of a date and more of a hook up. Very handsome dude. I made my intentions clear and asked him what he was interested in. "Firefighting, f_*_ing, and fighting." Yeah, tough guy, let's meet for drinks and go back to your place! Have drinks, going well. Go back to his place and have more drinks, still going well. Start getting down to business and, when we're both nearly completely undressed, he pulls away. Quickly dress and run out the door with a pat on his head while he cries about his ex-girlfriend. He was not ready for a hook up.
11. She's A Biter
[rebelmouse-image 18356652 is_animated_gif=Getting bit by her on my arm so hard, that it left mild teeth marks and a massive bruise, even through my thick pleather jacket.
12. The Morning-After Texts
[rebelmouse-image 18352554 is_animated_gif=First date with a girl I met on Tinder. Great chemistry, great time, although she is checking the time frequently throughout the date I don't think much of it as it goes for 5 hours, night even ends with some making out and petting. Next morning I wake up to a flurry of text messages... turns out she had a boyfriend she was having troubles with and before she our date she dropped off her dog so he could babysit it. There they had sex right before our date and apparently she swallowed and didn't brush her teeth before leaving. And then I kissed her a few hours later.
13. The Date Cost An Entire Car
[rebelmouse-image 18356653 is_animated_gif=i took this artsy fartsy girl to a theatre for a play. cool whatever. afterwards we're walking back to my car and everything is going normal. small talk. she suddenly breaks down into tears and cries about missing her ex. guess we're not getting chinese food anymore. take her home. she lives in boonie-ville. foggy as hell at night. drop her home. never taking her on a date again. head back home. phone loses signal because boonie-ville. run a red light because thick fog and gps going apeshit. hit another car. total the car.
0/10 would not go out again with an artsy girl who was secretly still stuck on her ex at the cost of an entire car.
14. Recovering Ass-coholic
[rebelmouse-image 18356654 is_animated_gif=A guy I met online.. can't remember which site, but he scheduled the date at a bar - not even a restaurant, a BAR. A bar that didn't even serve food. He was apparently a recovering alcoholic so he only ordered Cranberry juice but he failed to tell me that until after I had already ordered a glass of wine.
Why on EARTH would you invite someone to a BAR if you're an addict? The entire thing was so bizarre to me and on top of it he turned out to be a complete ass.
He ended up leaving and wanted to walk me back to the metro and I basically said "no thanks I'll stay here for a bit." He was shocked/offended.. don't know.. but finally left. When he left the bartender immediately came over and was like "holy shit that guy was a DOUCHE!" took care of my tab and gave me another on the house. So there was at least a silver lining.
15. Neckbeard
[rebelmouse-image 18356656 is_animated_gif=So, I've read a lot about neck beards on here. I've never seen an actual neck beard in person, however. Then I went on a Bumble date with this physical therapist.
The beard growing out of his neck, alone, killed any desire that I had. I get it now, everyone.
16. Bathroom Zoom
[rebelmouse-image 18356657 is_animated_gif=The girl claimed that she was going to pay her half. When the check comes she asks to use the bathroom. 10 (awkward) minutes go by and right when I'm about to text her she zooms out of the restaurant leaving me with the check.
17. Table For Two ... Plus Thirty More
[rebelmouse-image 18356267 is_animated_gif=I asked a girl in my APUSH class out on a date a few years ago, we had all the details set in stone, and I showed up to find out she invited the 30 other people from the class. I had to sit through an hour and a half of the "class lunch" which she gave me credit for organizing and pretend that I didn't think it was gonna be a date the whole time. Ouch.
18. Don't Drink? Don't Pub!
[rebelmouse-image 18356658 is_animated_gif=With some girl I was talking to online who agreed to meet in a pub but then only ordered lemonade after lemonade whilst me (as the heavy drinker that I am) was just downing pint after pint amidst her cringe worthy attempts at starting conversation that went absolutely nowhere.
Clearly neither of us were comfortable but there didn't seem to be a socially acceptable way of ending it so when we walked around an art gallery in Camden that had a bar and I disappeared off to get a drink and she didn't bother trying to find me afterwards that ended it good enough and it strangely turned into a pretty awesome night drinking with random people.
tl;dr: If you aren't a drinker don't agree to meet someone in a pub. It is only going to end badly.
19. Ignoring Your Date Is A Bad Idea
[rebelmouse-image 18356660 is_animated_gif=Girl and I went out for our... second? or maybe third? date. We were going to see a movie with a bunch of her friends, and then hang out after at a Dairy Queen or something. Cool. Well, she was only interested in me until her friends showed up... spent the time waiting for them just bitching about her coworkers, then when they showed up basically ignored me the rest of the evening. I introduced myself and chatted with a couple of her friends while she sat with the rest at the next table over.
Apparently she thought the date went really well, she leaned in for a kiss when I was saying goodbye and I wasn't feeling it at all so I went for the awkward hug instead. Later told her I wasn't feeling any chemistry between us and she seemed a bit confused why...
20. Never Been Dated
[rebelmouse-image 18356661 is_animated_gif=My worst experience is that I've never been on a date
H/T: Reddit
Have you ever found yourself in a conversation, when someone brings up a topic they aren't too familiar with, but you are?
This gives you the opportunity to sweep in and share your knowledge on the subject.
While one would imagine that your relative expertise on the subject might result in thanks and appreciation, more often than not, the reaction from your friends is "why do you know that?"
Awkward as it may feel at the moment, there are very few people who don't carry some unusual areas of expertise and trivia on subjects most others are most likely unfamiliar with.
Redditor quadruple_b was curious to learn the random facts others have shared which wound up bringing their conversations to a halt, leading them to ask:
What is a really weird fact, that makes people say "why do you know that?"
Octopuses... they're just like us
"Octopuses are usually very antisocial but when they’re under the influence of ecstasy they are more willing to spend time around each other or even hug other octopuses."- Stab_That_Ukulele
The body compensates
"When you are starving, and have little body fat left, your body can grow almost fur-like hair to insulate itself in absence of fat."- A_Stupid_Fish29
"Your body’s normal functions can slow down to accommodate organ disease."
"For example, I have 40% lung function, but my O2 is completely normal at 98% saturation."
"They didn’t discover any lung disease until I had a ct scan done for other reasons and my lungs happened to show up in that."- nocturnal_numbness
What this would do for humanity!
"Cheetahs are so genetically similar that supposedly you can draw blood from one and inject it straight into another one without any health issues in the receiving animal."
"I.E. no blood type or clotting factor variations."- 0ttr
So strange, that it makes perfect sense?
"Coca-Cola can help with blood stains."- Buzzed_Woody
Good thing they don't need a toilet...
"Guinea pigs average pooping around 100 times a day."- morgandanso
Um...
"In Phoenix, Arizona, you are legally allowed to bury a dead body on your property without asking for permission/getting a permit/etc."
"The city asks that you contact them beforehand so they can send someone out to stake for gas/electric lines, but it’s not required."- hedalexa12
Who wouldn't?
"If provided with a mirror, dolphins will admire their own genitals."- Cymiril
The brain is a delicate creature
"There is a chemical called MPTP that specifically destroys dopaminergic neurons in the brain."
"About 3 days after someone ingests it, they get Parkinson's disease."- SheilaBoof
Gruesome with good intentions?
"In the 1960s or 70s, the Swiss Air Force dropped severed chicken heads all over the forests of Switzerland."
"The chicken heads contained the rabies vaccine, and the airdrop was to vaccinate wild foxes against rabies."- EnormousPurpleGarden
One never knows when learning this newfound information might become useful.
Especially for parents of children eager to buy a Guinea Pig...
People Divulge The One Thing They Wish They'd Never Discovered About Their Significant Other
As relationships get serious, it's understandable that one will want to know as much as possible about their significant others.
That is, until we make a discovery about them which might forever change how we view our relationship.
Sometimes, it might be a discovery that might just take some getting used to, even if we'd have been better off not knowing.
Other times, however, this newfound information makes remaining in this relationship untenable.
Redditor Mr_MightyMouse was curious to hear what people wished they'd never learned about their past and present relationships, leading them to ask:
"What is the one thing you found out about your S/O you wish you never did?"
He was anything but faithful
"He cheated on me."
"When I had cancer."- stolliolli
Her one true love... wasn't me
"She drunkenly admitted to her friends that her ex-boyfriend was the one and she’ll never get over him."
"Still not sure how to handle that information."- FreeFoot_
Complicit without knowing it.
"She was an opiate addict."
"I was funding her addiction unknowingly."
"I was helping her destroy herself and I was too stupid to realize that."- Local64bithero
Moving way too fast
"Not that it was that traumatic as we were only dating a few weeks, but she started real deal crying when I wouldn't put her on my life insurance."- Toasted_Bagels_R_Gud
Someone needs to sharpen their aim...
"I hang up a towel to dry my hands in the bathroom."
"Sometimes I would find it on the floor and think hmmm the towel fell off the rack."
"TEN YEARS GO BY."
"One day my husband casually says 'you are always so quick to do laundry, like if I accidentally pee on the floor and clean it up with the towel it is gone so quick'."
"I'm like what.... what?"
"WHAT!!!!!!"
"So yea, I've been drying my hands with pee towels for 10 years."
"FML."- kperkins1982·
A club no one wants to belong to
"I was dating my ex for two years and she drunkenly confessed that she had cheated on every bf she had ever had."
"We broke up not long after."
"Then found out she was also cheating on me with multiple people from the office."
"I’m now happily married!"
"She also hid her then current bf from me when we first hooked up, he was asleep in another bedroom and we was in a different bed."
"She told him I missed the train home and needed a place to get my head down."- JancingSalmon
A stronger connection than they knew.
"He once dated a girl that he was getting fairly serious about until he showed up to a family event and she was there."- rowenaravenclaw0
What was he up to?
"He had a notebook of every detail of my life, including menstrual cycle, and also kept all the details of my friends and family members."
"Even ones I had never mentioned."
"And we were only together for two months."- totalfranmove
The news no one wants to hear
"That she had Cancer, which ultimately took her."
"That is literally the only thing I found out about my late wife that I ever regretted."- d20gamerguy
A happy anniversary indeed.
"This is NSFW."
"She gave me her phone to look for an address and make a restaurant reservation for our 7 year anniversary."
"I don't know why she gave me her phone, but I guess it was just destiny."
"Someone sent her a video on Whatsapp, and the next message says 'tomorrow again?'"
"From the same person."
"Now I am not one of those people who checks my partner's phone, I don't like that."
"But I was curious and clicked on it. It was a full 2 minute video of her hooking up with someone"
"Needless to say there was no anniversary dinner."- kmiaw
Even though everyone here says they wish they'd never learned these things, one has to imagine some of these people are, deep down, grateful.
As they may have been saved from trouble or pain down the line.
Even if it doesn't make these discoveries any easier.
It's ok to be naughty.
But sometimes... you wanna watch yourself.
Naughty can lead to trouble.
And we're talking adult naughty.
Maybe it's time we discussed it all.
Rule #1... Better safe than sorry.
Redditor Black_Hole_Baken-00wanted hear from all the people willing to share sexy secrets that might leave plenty of people blushing. They asked:
"What’s your most shameful NSFW moment?"
Elevators. Stairwells. Planes. You name it. I've shamed it. No Deets...
don't worry I wasn't naked...
"I was watching adult videos in the middle of the night. After I did my deed I felt a slight pain in my balls, like someone flicked their finger on them. The pain increased to the point that I had to walk it out. After some minutes I began screaming from the pain when my parents came to my room (don't worry I wasn't naked) seeing me in pain on the floor."
"At that moment I thought I did something wrong but was to ashamed to tell them.My dad rushed me to the emergency room where I was rushed in and my pants were removed. Laying there they gave me a nose spray which halted some of the pain. The doctor then started fondling my family jewels while the nurse stood next to me reminding me to breath because the nose spray stopped the automatic breathing if that makes sense."
"All the time my dad is standing there looking and the only thing I could thing at that moment was oh no do they think my unit is small. After that the doctors brought me to another room while my dad was in another room. While going trough the halls I told the doctor I probably know the cause and explained that I was pleasuring myself"
"I don't remember the doctors response but I felt truly ashamed like I was the only person doing such a thing. Later the doctor told me I had testicular Torsion which is caused by the balls not being attached to the sack so I'm living in fear of it happening again to this day."
Sick-Man_NL
"WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING??"
"In the 90's/early 2000's we bought a pub and moved into it. It had a big screen downstairs and we lived above, but Sky Sports was so expensive for the business account we basically hooked the giant screen to our box upstairs so whenever the sport was on it would show on the screen downstairs."
"So we couldn't watch TV upstairs except what was being shown on the big screen when this was happening. Anyway one Sunday evening around 10pm after the sport (bearing in mind the sport finished at 6pm) I was freely browsing through channels because the giant screen has been wound up into the ceiling and my 14 year old self came across some softcore adult videos"
"Curious, I started watching it. Suddenly there was a big buzz from the phone that connected to downstairs, I answer it. It's my mum with laughing in the background. "WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING??" I was like "errr.. I was just flicking through channels.." "Well you've stayed on that one for a while haven't you?"
"I forgot about the small TV in the bar area. It was still on and was showing the entire pub what my horny self was watching. I was mortified. Luckily my mum never brought it up again and neither did any of the customers thankfully."
Parish87
I Gotta Go
"When i was 12 my younger sister walked in on me playing fondle the dongle. I told her I couldn't pee and was trying to force/pump it out. She told my mom out of worry. Said I needed a doctor to help me pee. When Mom confronted me about what my sister was saying i then had to explain it to her."
itisbaileyikilledyou
"My mom walked in on me. The look on her face went from incomprehension to shock to utter disgust over the span of a second or two. She stayed calm and explained how it wasn't appropriate, but I just remember how unsmiling and tense she was, totally unlike I'd ever seen her. Decades ago but still cringe so much recalling it."
A_Dazzling_Method
Oh. My. God. Y'all are animals. And I'm LIIIIVVVING for it!
“underwear”
"My dad caught me editing the game files of The Sims to replace the female underwear textures with 'underwear' that just makes them look nude. Looked up reference material and edited them in photoshop. That a lot of effort to put into something so depraved."
IrrelevantPuppy
Mistakes
"When i was about 10, my parents were out so I looked up some adult videos on the family computer (mistake number 1), then I kept hearing noises and thought someone was in the house so i ran to my room and called my dad, leaving to computer on (mistake number 2)."
"My dad rushed home and went around the house looking for an intruder, no one was there, it was just my next door neighbors (we have a semi-detached house) then obviously saw what i was looking at on the computer and asked me about it… i told him the intruder must of broken in and searched it up :( "
Educational_Top122
Library Time
"In middle school, my friend got her boobs and she wanted me to touch them. We probably spent 30 minutes everyday before school until the librarian caught us and we were suspended."
Shef43
I wonder if she knew...
"My HS gf and I were having sex in the sideways laying down cuddling position. Mom walked in to show me a new Christmas decoration. To her it looked like we were just cuddling but she sat on the bed inches away from me and proceeded to talk about the decoration for like 10 minutes. I wonder if she knew. They never cared much about that stuff so I think she was just oblivious."
MyPupWrigley
I'm Dead
"I was violently ill. In my fiancé’s house where we were living. While he was at work, his dad was working from home. I needed my mom to take me to the hospital. I screamed for my father in laws help, who entered the bathroom to my nude body, puking at t in his bathtub. He called my mom for me, and we never spoke about it."
hammybachy
Well I need a cold shower and more vodka.
Don't have sex with people attached to someone already.
There is no good excuse.
There is no reason that makes it worth it.
Most of the time the "reasons" are lies.
RedditorVirtual_Welder_4525wanted to hear from those willing to spill a little tea about some bedmates. They asked:
"People who knowingly have slept with someone who was in a relationship, why did you do it?"
Why do we do it? I still don't know what I was thinking.
Hot. Not.
"I was young and it made me feel hot/desired . It was dumb."
miau121212
Liar
"She told me that she was in an open relationship but turned out that she was lying."
ipg9
"Yeah, I had the same thing happen. Girl told me she was in an open relationship, I slept with her, then she told her boyfriend about it. So the next day I get a call from her boyfriend, threatening to kick my @ss."
"Story does have a happy ending though. I had text history of our conversation leading up to the hookup, as well as her texting me about how good it was after I had left. I sent him screenshots, showing proof of her saying she was in an open relationship. He dumped her and apologized for believing her."
Zappiticas
Come to your senses...
"I was freshly 18 working a restaurant gig and the attractive shift manger took an interest. Hooked up at work a few times on overnight shifts. One day his gf came in to eat and I realized they weren’t as on and off as he said. Wish I could stay I stopped there, but it happened once or twice more before both of us came to our senses. I think he was 27? Ended up getting my number and sending me inappropriate texts for the next three months after I quit that job. I still feel slimy."
silverpawsMN
23...
"I was 23 when it started and it went on for years and I felt like literal scum afterward every single time, but the sex was good, and I hated myself, so I figured it was the best I could do and I deserved to feel like crap. I justified it because I wasn't the only one he was cheating on his wife with, he had two or three other girls in rotation. I was just dumb and selfish and self sabotaging."
idontcare4205
Gross
"'You were gone! He was here!'", Shadynasty."
Johnny5isalive38
Humans will just do it anywhere. Just like pigs.
Like A...
"I was young and a virgin. She was gorgeous and sweet. She spun me a story about how bad her relationship was and I was hooked."
seemsmildbutdeadly
4+ Years
"I was 20/21 and had finally gotten out of an abusive household and was barely financially stable and not at all mentally stable. He was A LOT older than I was (his son was older than I was by a couple of years) but he did generally treat me pretty well."
"It went on for 4+ years. We were far from an ideal couple, even had he not been married, but overall it was a positive thing in my life at a time when I really needed it, and it became a safety net. It ended years ago and I feel deeply ashamed of it and my actions."
"But I've grown enough to know that I'm not that same person anymore and I'd never repeat it. I did learn that a poly relationship definitely suits me better than a monogamous relationship - but it can and should be done ethically and morally."
Mendel247
Her wife found out...
"I was in love but also young and selfish and could easily ignore that she was married/she was AGGRESSIVE in pursuing me for years (flying across states to see me, tracking me down at restaurants I would frequent, telling me she loved me and her marriage was in shambles, texting me from new numbers every time I told her to leave me alone). We started the stereotypical long-distance emotional affair that went into sexting/sexy pics. Her wife found out."
Femmeforever
No Excuses
"I was young and drunk, with low self esteem and a crippling need for validation. She came onto me and I found it hard to say no. I justified it to myself as I knew their relationship was on the rocks anyway. I figured, well it's basically over. They just aren't formally broken up. They did split up a few months later. I'm not excusing it, I knew it was wrong."
user262
Typical...
"Didn't know any better. Horny stupid teens do stupid horny things. Wouldn't happen nowadays."
AuthCentDegenerate2
Oh the things we do for a hot roll in the hay. Be better people.