People Share The Worst Thing A Teacher Ever Said To Them That Destroyed Their Self-Confidence
As a former teacher, I can tell you that the goal is to always hype up and encourage your students to reach their goals and be their best selves. As a former student, I can also tell you that not every teacher is like this. Unfortunately, there are a handful of teachers out there that use their position of authority to make them feel like they have power. I've seen it happen firsthand, and it's awful.
Sometimes, the people who we depend on for our growth are also the people who hurt our confidence the most. Here are a few examples from former students, who discuss the worst things a teacher could ever say to a growing kid.
U/f1rebird1523 asked: What's the worst thing a teacher has said/done to destroy your self-confidence?
It’s insane how full-grown adults can get away with abusing children while getting paid to do it.
Even the other kids knew this was messed up.
I watched this happen to my friend in 7th grade. It was social studies class and my friend was one of those students where the common core curriculum was horribly suited for the way he learned.
One day he asked me if he could borrow a red pen (the teacher was too lazy to grade the papers herself so she'd have us do it at the start of every class)
The teacher caught on to it and literally yelled to me "don't you dare give him that pen." And proceeded to chew him out saying that he was a sad excuse because he was too lazy to remember a simple pen, called him worthless, and told him that he'll go nowhere in life because he can't keep track of simple things.
She spent the first half of the class continuously belittling him to the point where students were asking her to stop. Despite the fact that half the class reported this terrible treatment, she was not punished.
Way to permanently damage a child.
I had a Dutch teacher that used to pick on me always. Once before a presentation she told me that no matter how good my presentation was she wasnt going to give me a grade higher than a 5. I ended up almost having a panic attack in front of the class, told her to go f*ck herself and stormed out of the classroom. Got a 4 eventually.
This is so unbelievably petty.
I was nominated for a place in the Gifted and Talented program at my school. I was 10 or 11, and had precious little that I was proud of, but I could write like nobody's business. I was nominated for writing and was promised that I would not be tested on mathematics (worst subject then and now).
The teacher giving me the exam had a beef with my mom, and presented me with the mathematics test. I told her that I'd been told I didn't need to take it. She said it wouldn't count, just to do it. I did.
I don't remember much else between that moment and sitting in front of the panel, between my parents, silently crying and trying not to make eye contact as I was told I'd done so wretchedly on the mathematics portion of the test, which I wasn't supposed to take, that they were considering pulling me back a grade, and that the nomination had been a horrible mistake and should never have been made in the first place because the Gifted and Talented program was for "students of an outstanding nature and SkepticLinguist just didn't meet our expectations in mathematics." Did I also mention that the teacher who gave me the test was on the panel?
Saw that teacher later on, and she always gave me the smuggest smile before she flounced away. I was kind to her, as that was really all I had going for me at the time, but that messed me up for years, and still keeps me awake at night some times.
Jokes on her, though, I'm a published author now.
Sometimes these things happen in the high school and college world as well, and can be equally traumatic.
What happened to constructive criticism?
I'm an architecture student and in my design class we'd usually have a panel of guest professors to critique on our projects. In one of them a professor just outright said "your design is boring" and that was it, no other comments or suggestions for improvement. I think another panel member noticed and quickly added in a constructive comment to save it. But that moment still hit me and I've lost a lot of confidence in my designs since then.
Why would you assume that?
When I was in high school I had this English teacher that was basically a washed up mean girl in her 50s.
She gave us an assignment about our goals and where we wanted to go after highschool. I wrote about my interest in music. She shot it down and told me that it would never happen, I would be lucky to get a job as a fast food shift worker.
I remember some other time I was casually talking to her and she asked where I lived for some reason. I described it to her and she got all confused, then asked me if if I lived in an actual house. She said she was surprised I lived in a house because she assumed I lived in an apartment or trailer or something.
This is a mess all around.
My mum would not allow a PC in the house, she saw them as the devils devices. (She’s very old fashioned and a bit mad if I'm honest) She was convinced that no high school in the world could demand an essay written on a PC.
One of my teachers asked for an essay and said it needed to be written on a PC and printed out. I tried to convince my mum but she was having none of it. She told me to tell him we couldn't afford one. I straight up did not want to say that because it was a lie and I knew the teacher wouldn't buy it and I knew that regardless, I would be bullied for being poor. I was already being bullied pretty bad at the time due to not having expensive trainers and clothes, so I wanted to avoid adding to the list.
I wrote the essay by hand, in the best possible handwriting, stapled the pages in order like a little book and put it in a little plastic thingy. I did my best.
Teacher ripped it up in front of the whole class and threw it in the bin. He refused to beleive there was a household in the world that didn't own a computer and yelled at me for being a lazy little smart a**. He compared the essay (which he did not read) to a dish rag. The class actually went silent and the bullies actually eased up a bit which I did not expect.
I returned home miserable and angry, told mum what happened. She still refused to allow a PC but conned someone else's mum to let me use theirs. The last was so nice to me and I could tell she felt sorry for me. Mum called her up and said "we are too poor for a PC can my daughter use yours?"
IF WE COULDN'T AFFORD IT I would have been ok with it. But we could. We could have got a second hand ancient little thing with just Word on it. It was just lies and that still irritates the f*ck out of me. And I hate to think what that a**hole teacher put other students in not-so-great circumstances through. More than anything I hate that there are people walking around that thought it was ok to make someone's life miserable because they were (as far as they could tell) too poor to have nice things.
But more than anything, middle school seems like the worst spot for kids getting bullied by teachers. Here are some of the worst cases.
That’s the worst attempt at “motivating” I’ve ever seen.
Oof. Okay. Middle school seems to be universally bad for everyone but my older sister died the same year middle school started for me. Dealing with grief and undiagnosed ADHD + dyscalculia meant I was not a good student. People were decent that first year, but by the new school year and approximately 1-2 years after my sister's death I was being told by one of my teachers that I needed to be over it.
12-13 years old by then, struggling immensely and I can't adequately explain why doing things was hard for me so she just took the bad approach: I needed to stop using my sister's death as an excuse and get my grades up or else I was on the path to repeating 8th grade.
Other teachers were bad there too, with many of them using public humiliation against me having bad grades as an attempt to "motivate" me, but all it did instead was lead me to believe I was a failure.
That one teacher though hurt me so bad. I'm almost 31 now and I am realizing still how much shame I carry over my ADHD, the distrust I have for authority figures, and the fractured confidence I have that I'm capable of doing things. I work full time with a stable job, I have a boss I like working with, and I'm loved and married and have friends, but this still follows me.
That’s not only bullying, but also sexist.
I was doing poorly in school ~2006 because I was horrifically depressed. My 6th grade teacher took a special interest in "helping" since she knew my sisters so one time she made me stay after class and in a roundabout way accused me of being lazy and said "what will you do if your husband dies? how would you support yourself" and I burst into tears because all of my home issues stemmed from my dad dying from an aneurysm very suddenly the year before.
My grades started drifting even more after that so uh. Thanks Dr. Alexander.
That’s gotta be hard to begin with.
I moved to Germany as a pre-teen, and I didn't speak the language at all upon arrival - had to learn it as I went.
In my second year here, my mother decided to put me in an all-German school. My language skills were still quite shaky, so it was quite difficult. German class was the hardest.
I had this teacher who took a disliking to me for being a foreigner. He would constantly pick on me, and make me repeat things, saying he couldn't understand what I was saying due to my accent.
The cherry on top was when we had an exam, and we had to write an essay on a book we had read in class. I had severely struggled with the book, as it was written in a Berlin dialect - at the time I was barely able to read normal German, let alone a book written in a very heavy dialect. My teacher failed me completely on the exam, saying that I had not understood the task and my spelling and grammar were atrocious. At the time, my mother had a colleague who was a German teacher. She looked over my exam after I had gotten it back and was surprised that he had failed me - I had by no means done brilliantly, but it was still worth a passing grade.
Needless to say, I was devastated and was convinced that my German is terrible and I was no good, and I would never be any good and I simply suck.
Even today I am still a little self-conscious when speaking German, especially in public settings. Which is quite unfortunate, considering that I'm an interpreter...
Why would a child lie about that?
I had a teacher in middle school who would pick on me constantly. One time in the sixth grade there was this math problem and it had this banking term I wasn't familiar with cause you know I was 11 and didn't go to the bank. So I tried to do the problem on context clues and got it wrong.
The next day when she collects the homework she told me how could I get such a simple problem wrong. I tell her I didn't know the meaning of one of the words. She says I'm lying and even if I didn't I should have asked my parents. I told her my parents are immigrants and only my dad can speak English fluently and that he was at work when I wading doing my homework. She says I'm lying again about my mom not knowing too. She berates me some more until I have tears in my eyes.
Overall, as a former elementary school teacher I am getting so angry reading about all of these stories. However, I am of firm belief that if teachers were paid a better wage, we wouldn't end up hiring these kinds of teachers, and see this kind of behavior happening.
Teachers, treat your kids better. They're just small people that don't understand everything yet.
The Weirdest Animal Facts People Know
Reddit user FunChemical3182 asked: 'What is the weirdest animal fact you know?'
People accumulate facts throughout life on a wide variety of subjects.
Some are mundane while others are weird, wild or wonderful.
One subject a lot of people focus on is animals. Most people have a favorite animal that fascinates them that they want to know all about.
Reddit user FunChemical3182 asked:
"What is the weirdest animal fact you know?"
Like Perry
"Platypus glow blueish green under ultraviolet light."
"They also don’t have nipples, they just exude milk from glands under the skin and the baby’s lap it up."
~ WakingOwl1
"They have electrolocation in their bills that lets them detect their food under water."
~ DrPlatypus1
"And they lay eggs."
"The more I find out about them the more I understand why people first thought they were fake."
~ Reidroshdy
"After seeing all these platypus facts I am convinced these things are aliens that have been abandoned on Earth."
~ SeattleOne206
Kapow!
"Mantis Shrimp have 16 different sets of cones. Rods and cones are in your eyes. Cones see color, rods see light and motion."
"Dogs have 2 sets of cones—green and blue. Humans have 3 sets of cones—green, blue and red."
"Mantis Shrimp are seeing colors we can't comprehend and explains why they're very colorful."
"That’s not even the strangest thing about them."
"They can also punch as fast as a .22 bullet which cause a cavitation bubble which boils the water around them at temperatures of several thousand Kelvins."
~ RigzDigz
Terrible Twos
"Cats have the mental capacity of a 2-year-old which makes a lot of sense."
~ Alive_Ad823
Like Tinder
"When a female sloth wants a mate she'll hang onto a tree branch and just scream."
~ Remarkable_Sink2542
Good Thing They're So Small
"Dragonflies are the most successful predators on Earth."
"When lions choose prey they have like a 10% chance of catching it."
"African painted dogs—who hunt in packs—have the highest kill rate of any mammal, successfully catching 51% of their prey."
"When a dragonfly locks onto a target, it has a 99.9% success rate!"
~ PurpleInevitable2103
On A Swivel
"Owls have really long necks, but it's hard to notice that because their feathers are so fluffy."
~ ergonaut
What About Cousin It?
"Sea otters are the most densely furred animal with 600,000 to 1,000,000 hair follicles per square inch."
"Dogs have about 15,000 per square inch, humans on average are between 800 to 1,290 hairs per square inch."
~ atom1129
Sucker Punchers
"Octopus punch other fish for no reason—so, for fun."
~ Samanthalynn8915
"There's a direct correlation between species' intelligence and dickish behavior."
~ TheDesktopNinja
Looks Are Deceiving
"Polar bear fur isn't white—it's translucent (for most frequencies of light). And they have black skin underneath."
"So polar bear fur lets all the light through to their black skin to warm them—except for a few visible frequencies to keep them camouflaged as white."
~ seedanrun
Who's Going To Attack One‽‽
"Honey badgers can turn their a**holes inside out and use the smell to deter attackers."
"Not sure what exactly has the guts to attack a honey badger, but if they have the courage to do so, the badger sure as hell isn’t gonna make it easy."
~ nonexistantauthor
Big Momma
"The Blanket Octopus exhibits the highest degree of sexual dimorphism known."
"Females: About 6 feet across."
"Males: About one inch."
~ Fabulous-Pause4154
High Times
"Dolphins will intentionally use puffer fish to get high."
~ altkaldra
"They upset blowfish so they inflate, and therefore emit poison. It gets the dolphins high. Then they pass it around, literally."
~ smack4u
"Not just the dolphins. I recently saw a video about 10 animals that like to get high. Very interesting."
~ s137leo__
"Lemurs do that with giant centipedes/millipedes too."
~ chubbyknuckles420
Fabrizio Frigeni on Unsplash
Better Than Bike Helmets
"Woodpeckers' tongues wrap around their brains to cushion them from the vibrations of slamming their face into trees all day."
~ we_made_yewww
"Their tongues also have barbs to grab bugs out of the holes."
"Their brains have additional cushioning because, you know, they spend their days smashing their face as hard as possible into trees."
~ RhynoD
Detachable Organs
"Argonauts [paper nautili] are small octopuses that are too lazy to have intercourse."
"They detach their penises and toss them into the open sea to mate with female argonauts."
"The detachable 'd*ck' is a tiny tentacle, complete with suckers and sperm, that develops in a cavity under the eye of a male argonaut [paper nautilus]."
"When it's time to mate, the tentacle explodes out of the cavity, instantly killing the male argonaut. The tentacle then swims towards a female argonaut to insert itself."
"Sexy, huh?"
~ Schwarzes__Loch
What's your favorite weird animal fact?
People Share Their Wildest 'I Can Fix Them' Dating Experiences
Content Warning: Mental Health, Suicide, Domestic Violence
We all know that we technically can't make anyone else do anything, and we certainly can't "fix" other people. Other people will only change or do something if they choose to; the only person we can really control is ourselves.
But some people really love to try, often to hilarious and terrible results.
Already cringing, Redditor Dapper_Algae6280 asked:
"People who entered a relationship thinking 'I can fix them,' how did that go?"
Time for an Upgrade
"There is a weird thing that happens when you 'fix' someone. They tend to think if you liked them broken, then they deserve better than you now that they are better than they were."
- TheRealLifePotato
"As horrible as it sounds, to have a happy, emotionally healthy relationship you need two happy, emotionally healthy people. If you want to be in that sort of relationship, you need to fix yourself first."
- inactiveuser247
"This right here. After three sh*tty relationships in a row, I realized this is a me problem. I took a few years off from dating to reflect and really learn to see red flags and understand myself so I wouldn't make that mistake again."
- MikoSkyns
No More Spark
"My now ex had PTSD, depression, and a variety of other issues she claimed. After two and a half years of dating (being my first and only relationship), she became more social, less suicidal, and overall happier as a person."
"She decided to cheat on me with someone else due to 'lack of communication' and us 'no longer having a spark". The irony."
"For context, we were 17 at the time, in high school, and I worked full-time hours with initiatives to hang out, which were refused. Red flags everywhere."
- elteragxo
"Your situation is eerily similar to mine, what the f**k?"
"I met a girl with mental and emotional issues and decided to fix them through a healthy relationship. She recovered and found someone else because 'the spark was gone.'"
- Aimlessdrifter8778
Misery Loves Company
"Now we are both broken."
- Brave-Butterscotch76
"The same thing happened to my sister-in-law. She married a very negative and miserable guy while saying 'he will get better' or 'we’re working on it,' and now she’s a very negative and miserable person."
- Moreofyoulessofme
Getting to Watch a Partner Grow
"At first we were only f**king. I don't know if I ever thought I could fix her, but I did fall in love with this beautiful lady with severe anxiety, depression, and trust issues after being in a domestically violent relationship."
"We were f**k buddies for about six months and I got a glimpse of her issues but I still went ahead and asked her to be my girlfriend The heart wants what it wants."
"We dated for a year and a half (two years since meeting), and I actually got to see her at her worst a few times, but I was finally able to get her therapy with a great psychiatrist and treatment, this is when I asked her to move in with me. We've been living together for six years."
"Four years ago, she had the worst breakdown I've seen. She went full-on paranoid, wall-scratching nervous, she was even doubting me and my motives to be there. It was a very difficult week, and she left the house and went to her mom's house in the middle of the night."
"Eventually, her therapist was able to get a hold of her and get her back to her senses. Her doctor then suggested that I also should go to a counselor or at the very least we should do couples therapy so we had strong bases for our relationship and we did."
"I now look back and won't change her for anything in the world, she has grown so much, and she glows right now. I now see her smile and it's glorious. She's achieved a great position too and it's amazing just to see how much happier she looks."
- Spiritual-Narwhal666
Not a Match
"I fixed what I wanted to fix, but that still didn't make us right for each other. In the end, I think she's in a much happier place than she could have been, so I think it was worth the time invested."
"We were wrong for each other, but at least we both came out better positioned to receive the happiness that would come to us later."
- MrWeb20
In Their Nature
"A couple of months into the relationship, I fixed him."
"After some irritation, he stopped peeing on the carpet. Now, my cat still brings mice, but I guess, that's just his nature."
- mobileJay77
The Importance of Boundaries
"I don't know if I would say that I 'fixed' her (and I wasn’t trying to), but I definitely taught my last ex the importance of being able to set boundaries and to stop going out of her way to please people who consistently hurt her."
"Eventually this would lead to us breaking up, but I have no regrets. I have issues of my own that were wearing her down and she did what she had to. Same rules apply. We’re both better off because of it."
- TylerTexas10
Happily Ever After
"She fixed herself and I fixed myself with each other's support, and we are living happily ever after, it seems, with ongoing work on ourselves and our relationship."
- DonPronote
An Uncommon Ending
"I didn’t fix them. But I tried my hardest to be patient and supportive while they fixed themself. Sometimes I was better at support than other times. Sometimes they were better at fixing than other times."
"It ended up being worth the patience. Things have been great with us for years now. I know this isn’t the normal outcome though, and I feel incredibly lucky."
- I_Invented_Frysauce
A Little Help from Our Friends
"Usually I'm the one people try to fix.. I think the repeated attempts definitely helped me. Now my current partner gets to enjoy the previous hard work."
"...I think I just got tired of hurting the people who love me and fixed myself, though."
- addrien
All Their Idea
"You can't fix anyone. You can only fix yourself, but if you really want to try and fix someone, you have to make it seem like it's their idea."
- BuhrZap
A Helping Hand
"I don't think you can fix anyone. You can only help them fix themselves, which is very different."
"If someone is actively trying to fix themselves, and you can actually be the person to support them through it, then it can work, but it could also not work."
"I do think there should be a distinction between the two. I mean, trying to fix someone is a bad idea, but if you like someone and are willing to support them in their journey to fix themselves, it's probably not the worst idea in the world."
- brooksie1131
Lesson Learned
"It went so well that they managed to cure me of the desire to 'fix' anybody."
"I’ll toss you a life preserver if you’re trying to save yourself. But I’m not jumping in the water with anyone so they can drown me on their way out."
"People who need to hit rock bottom in order to better themselves will use you to soften their landing if you let them."
- GlobalPermit5428
Best Friends Forever
"It went well but it didn’t work out."
"So we kind of fixed each other we were both at very weird points in our lives and we only dated for about one and a half years. We didn’t need a romantic partner but we did need a friend in each other."
"We’re both in better places now and the best of friends. We both want each other to be part of our lives just not as lovers."
"All and all, I say we got the best outcomes in our lives."
- CODMAN627
So Worth the Investment
"He was an Uber driver with only a high school diploma."
"I married him anyways and bankrolled his education because he was fun as f**k to be around, was the smartest person I’ve ever met, and loves me like I’m the only woman on Earth."
"Now, he’s a computer engineer and we are landlords together and have bought investment properties. We are very happy together."
"Partners work together to create success. I think selfish people ask, 'what’s in it for me?' Marriage is about selflessness."
"I’m glad I sacrificed for his education. His mind would be wasted otherwise and he’s a genius."
- BabyElephantWalks
In most of these cases, the situation went poorly after a Redditor tried to change someone, and for good reason. If that person isn't ready or doesn't want to be fixed, it's only going to damage the relationship.
There's also something to be said about unconditional love. If you don't want to date the person exactly as who they are right now, why are you even trying to date them?
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/Tough guys put on a facade that indicates to others that they always know what's going on.
But their confidence doesn't always match their intellect, which is probably why they cover their insecurities by walking around and trying to show everyone who's really the boss.
If that's the case, they should keep their mouths shut because not everything that comes out of their mouth needs to be heard.
Yet, it can be amusing to everyone else.
Curious to hear examples of these, Redditor PrototypeShadowBlitz asked:
"Reddit, what is the stupidest thing you've heard from the 'alpha male' community?"
You might find these guys at a bar.
The Dude Must Be Hungry
"Had a run in once with a group of young lads about something in a bar and one of them said we are top of the food chain bro and you will be the prey."
– insertitherenow
"'Whatever, mall ninja" -proper response."
– TheEighthLord
If The Shoe Fits
"That they were an alpha male."
– I_Have_A_Name37654
"The use of 'Alpha Male,' unironically is every indication that you're dealing with a child's understanding of manhood."
– 88Dubs
Brat Pack
"Me and my bros are all alpha males."
– SonOfDadOfSam
"I was skiing one time and rode the lift with a guy that said, 'I don't feel no pain. I live with 5 roommates and none of us feel any pain.' Okay, bud. That's a really interesting coincidence."
– NicPizzaLatte
They sure thrive on making sexist comments.
Contagious Femininity
"A coworker said, 'I don't spend too much time with my girlfriend because I'll become too feminine.'"
– Lazy_Natural6154
"FELLAS IS IT GAY?!"
– aliebabadegrote
Sexist Categorization
"I have been called a beta for saying that my wife makes more money than I do. She works in a more lucrative field and is more educated than I am, so it makes perfect sense that she makes more than I do."
"So I came back, and this post has really blown up. There's just a few things I want to clarify."
"1- I have only ever been called a beta online."
"2- I work full-time in project management. I have a master's degree. I have a 6 figure salary."
"3- My wife has a PhD and works in finance. She also has a 6 figure salary, it's just a higher salary than my own."
"4- I'm sorry to anyone who might feel as though my original post misled them."
– ExaminationDouble240
It's Teamwork
"A real man would be proud of his wife for achieving success, and not fall for that sort of insecure bullsh*t."
"It's not a contest, that's the real joke here. Good on you for seeing the big picture."
– Mrbeardoesthethings
Do these roles about parenting sound familiar?
Childish Things Are Too Girly
"Real men don't take their kids trick or treating is one that I heard recently."
– constructionguy89
"Related. Guys who brag about not changing diapers, not playing 'girly' games, etc. Essentially guys who brag that their only contribution to fatherhood is money and masculine things like fishing or football. Even then some of them brag about not paying a lot of child support to prove they didn't let the system take advantage of them."
"I can't imagine a life so empty my only accomplishment worth bragging about was being a terrible parent."
– Green7000
This Woman's Work
"I was told that taking care of my kids is woman's work. Apparently it's concerning that I try to spend so much of my free time with them. Oddly enough the meatheads at my grappling club think it's sweet I occasionally have my daughters' hair clips on and nails painted."
– MrFunktasticc
People discussed rules in the bedroom.
Never Submissive
"That a man is turned off when their wife/girlfriend seduces them, because if she wants sex and shows it she is a sl*t, also making the man the submissive one…"
– kamalaophelia
Stifling Emotions
"Not the whole community, but was cuddling with a guy once and could tell he was trying not to get emotional over something that was bothering him. He said, quite literally, 'it's not alpha male behaviour.' I told him that I liked that he showed emotions sometimes, and he looked disgusted by the fact that I pointed it out."
– LambLifts
In high school, a classmate who was on the football team said I was a "sissy" for listening to classical music.
The other classmates laughed at me, which was hardly surprising since all of the guys on our unbeatable football team were considered stars on campus.
This kind of mockery was a typical day for me.
I can laugh at their idiotic comments now but back then, I don't know why I ever let them get under my skin.
We've all done things, or in some cases, regularly do things that others might consider weird.
Even so, we often feel no shame or embarrassment and embrace how unusual these habits are, and take our friends teasing or laughing at us for doing so in stride.
Sometimes, however, we might not like to advertise some of our unusual habits or actions and make every effort to keep them a well-guarded secret.
As raised eyebrows are much easier to take than blatant judgment from friends and peers.
Redditor Key_Nectarine_1969 was curious to hear all the weird things people have done which they still keep under lock and key, leading them to ask:
"What’s the weirdest thing you’ve done that you could only tell people anonymously?"
The Devil [Dogs] Is In The Detail...
"All throughout middle school, there was someone who tucked unwrapped Hostess Devil Dogs into the toilet paper dispensers in the bathrooms, so that when you pulled some toilet paper out, the devil dog would fall out into your hand."
"We had to have an assembly about it."
"That person... Was me."- bejeweled_sky
Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time
"Was drunk at an escape room with coworkers."
"It was an extreme one where you are handcuffed the entire time."
"I decided in my drunken state that it would be bada** to dislocated my thumb and slip off the cuffs like the movies."
"It wasn't."
"We got kicked out, my coworkers were weirded out and I had to go to the hospital."
"I quit a few weeks later."
"White collar wasn't for me."- Grotesque-penguin
The Bread Of Heaven
"Stole over 1,000 wafers from church because I really liked the communion wafers & didn’t know where else to get them."
"I felt really blessed & cursed for a long time."- hALLIEcinate
Retracing Steps...
"Once I got off the subway in NYC and I was super early for an appointment."
"So I picked a random guy and just followed him on foot for like 30 minutes, pretending I was like a private detective or something."
"Always kept about a half block behind."
"He turned this way and that, and eventually went into a building I had lived in 9 years earlier."
"It was weird, and so was I."- OKsurewhynotyep
Hygeine Be Damned...
"I found a dead rat in a field when i was younger and kissed it bc I wanted to say goodbye."- qeleia
Bad Decisions Have A Way Of Getting Back To You...
"We got super drunk and ate a ton of spicy food in New Orleans."
"Back at the B&B, the food started to come out the back side."
"I was sitting on the toilet sh*tting bricks of fire."
"At that moment, the booze decided to hang a u-turn."
"The trash can was out of reach and I couldn't risk standing up from the toilet for even 5 seconds."
"The closest receptacle was the bathtub."
"I managed to turn in such a way that I could keep shi*ting in the toilet while projectile vomiting into the tub."
"Both ended up clogged, and there was no plunger."
"I had to call the owner to explain that I had destroyed both their toilet and their tub simultaneously."- HoopOnPoop
Things Best Left To Professionals...
"My partner is weirdly prone to cysts."
"I had to drain a 3 inch cyst on her back (thankfully she had a dr's appt the next week), then multiple other little cysts on her legs and chest."
"I never told her to her face but that first giant cyst literally haunted me, the amount of pus and blood I saw....good heavens."- SleepyBiologist
At Least A Lesson Was Learned...
"When I was walking to school one morning, I saw a kid (7-8 yo?) kicking a dog."
"I ran over & kicked the kid and asked him how it felt."
"He ran off and no one saw."
"Still not sorry."- sneezyailurophile
All Creatures Deserve Love
"I was extremely socially isolated as a child and tried to make friends with the coyotes who lived in the woods by our home."
'I caught one in a snare and fed and kept her."
"I wanted a friend."- letthetreeburn
That's What Friends Are For...
"My wife and her best friend pick me up from a frat party black out drunk."
"Then they helped me take a sh*t on the toilet, wiped my a** and then gave me a shower and put me to bed naked."
"Don’t remember any of it."- nc3100
Not The Right Kind Of Manure...
"One time I went outside at like 2AM and put the garden hose nozzle into my butthole and sprayed some water into it, then farted it out onto the lawn."
"Basically gave myself an enema with a garden hose."
"I did this because I was bored."
"My neighbour saw me and told my dad (lived at home at the time)."- WaspsInMyGoatse
A Little Fantasy Now And Then...
"When I was younger I joined an international dating site that I figured was a scam."
"Put a black square as my picture and gave myself a fake name, and then looked through their users."
"And after about 10 minutes I had like a 100 messages."
"Most of them were messages telling me how handsome I was or how these women fell in love with me at first site."
"Now I knew it was a scam but when ever I felt down or got rejected for a while I would pop back on the site and read a few messages."
'Yeah it’s kinda cringy and probably pathetic but it made me feel better."
"I would just turn off that logical part of my brain that knew it was a scam for awhile and just pretend I was this popular and desirable guy."
"And it honestly got me through the day sometimes."- Demonking3343
If anyone says they've never done anything they're ashamed, or at the very least less-than-proud of, in all likelihood, they are lying.
Or, more likely, they understandably want to pretend that it never happened.
Which might be a little easier than harboring a secret.