Listen to me, if you never take another piece of advice in your life, take this one: take any advice anyone gives you with a grain of salt. Yes, I'm fully aware of the irony happening in this article right now.
I've been on the receiving end of TERRIBLE advice. Example: I was explaining to an acquaintance how frustrating it can sometimes feel to be so short - not just because I can't reach things or because of my spinal pain, but because people often treat me like a child. They unintentionally treat me like I'm dumb, naive or otherwise incapable. That's when this person hatched their master criminal plot for my life.
I should just go ahead and park in handicapped spots and ignore any tickets I got for it. According to them, since I have occasional spinal problems I should probably have a tag anyway. I could just ignore tickets until I had to go to court, then show up in court and play naive and nobody would ever really punish me for it. Dude. No.
One Reddit user asked:
What's the worst piece of advice you've received?
Believe it or not, it gets worse. Here are some responses:
No Mom, No.
GiphyMy mom told me that if I like a girl I should just follow her everywhere she went and give her gifts, like a vial of my blood (actually said that).
No mom. No.
- huazzy
Sleep.
"Never go to bed angry."
This was written in lots of wedding cards! We totally ignored this advice. Because if you're tired and getting more cranky you're more likely say something you will regret. We just sleep on it and in the morning, if its still worth discussing, you can go in with a clear head - or sometimes its not worth bringing up and you can both move on with your day.
Never Trust The Roommate
Dating a girl in Uni, her roommate told me she "loves an*l, but is shy about saying it."
I learned:
A) Always discuss an*l in advance
B) Never trust the roommate
No Effort Needed
To not put any effort into finding a partner. Just sit back and it will happen.
That might have worked once when people were more social and went to church regularly and things like that. Also it was common in the past for older people to make an effort to introduce single people to each other. Society just isn't like that anymore.
When I was single, my way of life put me into contact with very few people who were actually single and eligible and interested in me in return. If I hadn't put the effort in to meet someone I would have remained single.
Your Parents Don't Know Everything
My parents encouraged me to go to a University that costs $63,000 with no financial aid when I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. "You'll figure it out" they said. They also had me deny the federal student loans I was granted through FAFSA as it wasn't worth it.
I transferred, graduate in May, and that 1 year in school is 45% of my 4 year aggregate debt. Declared a Finance major so I can make informed decisions and not rely on their advice. I'm trying to get into one of the best Macc programs in the country and that debt level is seriously inhibiting my ability to go if I get in.
Your parents don't know everything.
Change Him
"Marrying him will make him change."
Followed by...
"Having a kid with him will make him change."
Followed by.....
"Having a second kid with him will make him change."
Followed by....
divorce papers and child support.
Because Other Men...
GiphyI was once taking my buddy's girlfriend for a walk because he asked me to keep her busy while he was at work. While we were walking, I stumbled upon an old high school classmate of mine who gave me that look of "damn, what you got there?"
I didn't pay any attention to it and just kept walking. After a while he sends me a message on my phone, asking me if that's my girlfriend. I told him she wasn't, I told him she was only my buddy's girlfriend who I was keeping busy. He told me to "steal" the girl and I obviously told him that's ridiculous and that I would never do something that disgusting.
His advice to me was: "Just do it because other men will always do it to you." The most ridiculous piece of advice I have ever had the displeasure of hearing.
Just Do It Fast
I was learning to drive and kept nosing out to turn but couldn't see if a car was coming (I am turning they would be going straight). My friend that was teaching me simply said, 'Just do it fast'.
Not Allowed
Both the worst and best advice... I'd just finished my first day of work for a company who'd hired me to work as a DB admin. Instead of doing anything related to the job title, they had me doing data entry all day in excel. I was alright with it, believing that it was just a temporary introduction type thing. Certainly wasn't what I wanted to do.
Brother asked, "So how was your first day?", "Eh, kind of lame. Data entry in excel is boring and I don't get anything out of it."
To which he responded, "Word of advice, you're not allowed to not like any part of your job. You can like some things more, but never dislike something."
I quit the next morning after having a complete nervous breakdown resulting from thoughts like:
"Is this what working is? What's the point of even existing if I'm not allowed to dislike (and subsequently try to avoid) jobs? Why would I ever want to go through life doing what I hate and trying to smile about it like it's alright?"
I certainly reacted more poorly to that experience than I had to any before in my life, but it made me realize that I would rather be homeless or dead than live working a job I hate for someone I've never even met in a company that doesn't care about me.
I work for myself now, and sure there are still things I have to do for my own business that I may not like... and I may not be all that successful, but everything I do now is for me. I love what I do and wouldn't trade it for any amount of financial security.
Break Up Because You're Happy
Some of my high school friends told me to break up with my boyfriend because we didn't fight. Apparently that meant there was no passion in our relationship. We didn't fight because we discussed problems in a rational manner, rather than screaming at each other in public displays (which were common among this group of friends).
Fifteen years later, I'm happily married to said boyfriend, and haven't talked to those 'passionate' friends since high school ended.
Hate Who You Love
My mom gave me awful relationship advice: you have to hate who you love. It makes no sense to me. She's been in a terrible loveless marriage which explains the advice .... but ye gods woman! Keep that shit to yourself.
WTF Is A Gay Laundromat?
GiphyMy former friend's dumbass husband was asking me once why I don't date. I'm a gay woman and, at the time, I lived in a smallish town south of Boston. There were opportunities, but I had grown tired of the search. So I just told him something like "I don't know, I guess I don't know where to look" ... and then he told me to go into the city and find a gay laundromat to do my laundry at and then I can meet people. I just kinda tipped my head and looked at him and said "sure...,.great idea."
What the f*ck is a gay laundromat?!
"Free" Money
Borrow against your 401K to buy yourself "toys". His logic was that you only owe yourself money so its basically "free" money.
He was 41 and I was 20. That man will never see retirement. lol
- Archer_F
Just Get Fake Ones
"You don't have to take care of your teeth, you're gonna get your adult teeth and even then, you could just get fake ones," said my dad to 9 year old me. So as a kid I formed a shit habit and then depression took hold and made it a billion times worse.
Now at 27 years old I've got an appointment on Friday for approval to get dental surgery to remove 7 teeth (4 of them wisdom teeth) and already had 2 teeth taken out a few years ago. It's my fault of course, but his advice didn't really help anything, lol.
Setting You Up For Failure
My former boss advised me to buy a house about a week before he laid me off.
- Siiw
See What It's Like
I don't want to have kids but my mom told me to just have one and see what it's like. Mom, there's no free trial to parenthood and it sounds totally not worth it either way.
The Bad Cells
At my local barber a very old patron declared we could cure breast cancer if the president would make breastfeeding mandatory. I quote "it sucks the bad cells out".
- Ediolon
A Mountain Of Privilege
Giphy"You need to find yourself! Don't rot away at some horrible office job! Go climb that mountain! Seriously, what happened to the dreamers out there?"
I had no words since I worked my ass off to get a stable cushy office job that pays decently all in an air conditioned building with free coffee. College debt, working through college, living with parents for a long time, the sacrifices they made so I could get a job like this, etc etc.
F*ck you for thinking what I do is terrible. Issue is, she was a white suburban girl that had wealthy parents. Go figure.
The Reason
To view everything with "everything happens for a reason" in mind.
Depending on how you look at it, it's either a great saying or a miserable one. Yes, everything happens for a reason. The reason is what you actually control, not from some higher up spirit that is controlling each and every action.
"Oh no I failed my exam."
"It's ok dude, everything happens for a reason!"
Yeah you failed your f*cking test because you didn't study. THAT was the reason.
There are so many things that you are in control of in your life, and you'll never learn from failure/disappointment if you just chalk everything up to being chance instead of recognizing some fault of your own.
- EqualBad
Just Stop
In a private hospital with severe anxiety 6 weeks after watching a fella die trapped in a car in front of me. "Just stop thinking about it". Yes Thank-you for that gem.
- skibba25
If I'm in the mood for some confrontation, I ask them to explain, in details, how not to think of something.
- high_pH_bitch
"Just stop wanting to not be alone" thanks Karen, I'll just flick off the switch that makes me horribly codependent and compulsively lonely. Best get back to your f*cking barbecue or whatever.
- wamirul
So what's the worst piece of advice you've ever gotten? Tell us your stories.
H/T: Reddit
"What’s the wildest thing you’ve ever heard teacher say in class?"
And Anyone With Such Closed Minded Views Shouldn't Be Teaching...
"Had the Head of the Department in college claim in class that anyone who actually needs accommodations for mental health issues should not be in college to begin with."
"This was while we were discussing 'Death of a Salesman' and the discussion had veered over to unhealthy pressure and social standards for success."- RavensQueen502
Wait what?!
"My very well-respected Biology teacher in college spent almost an entire lecture telling us that Jamie Lee Curtis was a hermaphrodite."
"It seemed oddly personal to him."- Urbane_Cowboy
Sad On So Many Levels
"Not heard but my freshmen year high school teacher once pulled a bottle of Jack out of his desk and took a shot during class."
"He was dying so towards the end I think he just stopped caring."- Mangothefello
Can't Take The Heat, Then Stay Out Of The Classroom...
"High school science teacher told my class that a kilometre was longer than a mile."
"Refused to budge when refuted and kicked out several students for doing so."- SupersonicDebris13
"5th grade teacher: 'Mount Whitney in California is the tallest mountain in the world'."
"5th grade me blurts out: 'No it isn't, Mount Everest is."
"Whitney is not even the tallest mountain in the USA, which is Mount McKinley in Alaska'."
"I got in trouble for 'contradicting the teacher'."- gtmattz
get out GIFGiphyIt's Not Just Students Who Are Bullies...
"I had a teacher ridicule a fat kid about his lunch choices in front of the whole class."
"He ran out crying as she was making fat guy blimp gestures and telling him he was going to be huge as an adult."- SnooOwls5859
Some Dramatic License It Seems...
"I had a literature teacher who told the class that he didn't believe in dinosaurs, because the universe is only a couple thousand years old."
"The bones were put there by Satan."
"Thank f*ck he wasn't a science or history teacher."- AllBadAnswers
of montreal dancing GIF by Polyvinyl RecordsGiphyEveryone Deserves Nice Acomodations...
"My English teacher told us that he genuinely believes that the Rothchilds own a hotel for aliens in the Bermuda triangle."- TroyLear77
Well, Then...
"We had this kid in our 6th-grade class."
"Very dark skinned kid from Africa."
"His name was Tajak."
"Every now and then when we'd line up to go to another class or lunch and the lights would go out some of his friends would go 'where Tajak at?'"
"Anyway one day we had a sub and we we're lining up for lunch, the lights went out and there went the 'where Tajak at?' and the SUBSTITUTE TEACHER who was also black went 'Boy you darker than night'."
"6th grade was f*cking wild."- 11221mikew
Sad Premonitions
"Psych teacher in high school told us that 1 in 10 of the people were friends with in high school would be dead within 5 years of graduating."
"At the time I thought it was hyperbole, but it turns out he was being conservative."
"3 of the people in my high school friend group were dead by the time I was 22."- Reddit
Do They Really Need A Reason?
"'Now girls, don't you let them boys touch your breasts'."
"'It'll give you cancer'."- jondru
Maybe Should Have Checked With The Geography Teacher?
"A teacher in Elementary school claimed during history class that the Colosseum was in Greece, as an Italian kid I was very confused, this was in Mexico."- Spascucci
So Much For Instilling Hope...
"Didn't hear this personally, but read in a book about a guy who recalled his teacher skipping chapters in a textbook and saying 'You will not need to know this when you are down in the mines'."- futanari_kaisa
The mark of a good teacher is that students will take everything they hear from them with them for the rest of their lives.
Though, the less-than-wonderful teachers may also say things their students will never forget.
Redditor RedditPenguin02 wanted to make a list of the best inquiries to make when starting a relationship, so they asked:
"What is a good question to ask before you start dating someone?"
From what I've learned in my past, always ask... "Are you into Buffy the Vampire Slayer? The TV show."
If it's a no, then it's a dealbreaker.
I Do
Shocked Schitts Creek GIF by CBCGiphy"Are you married?"
wrenchmonkey135
"I would ask that. If they said no, the next question was 'Would your wife agree?'"
"If they laughed, they were telling the truth. If they got indignant and pissed off that I thought they were lying…they were married."
"Worked every time."
Squibit314
We Lived!
"Do you clap when the plane lands?"
dont_u_know
"I swear people used to do this all the time when I was a kid (early 2000’s), and I don’t think I’ve heard anyone do it in 5+ years. I guess 9/11 really made people afraid of flying for about 10 years and then most folks decided they didn’t need to applaud when the plane landed safely?"
jmims98
Family Planning
"Do you want kids in the future? If one person wants kids and the other wants to stay child-free, then they are not compatible. And it is better to try dating someone else."
GoodAlicia
"It confuses me whenever some couples who disagree on this end up in a conundrum because one expected the other to change their mind. This is something I bring up early cause I see no future with someone who wants kids when I do not."
GoodAlicia
"You should always put childfree on your dating profile. It's not a small thing. Either you agree on it or not. If I had to date, I would put childfree on my profile too."
GoodAlicia
Carb it on...
"Do you like bread? That is the extent of my flirting skills."
HumpieDouglas
"Being German, bread is like a frickin' cultural phenomenon here, we have around 300 kinds of bread, there's a bread museum, every time I go on vacation I'm like yeah it's nice here but the bread ain't it yall, never as good as home lol. So yeah, valid question and the only answer to this is an enthusiastic yes."
Nayeliq1
Room Temperature
Frosty The Snowman Winter GIF by filmeditorGiphy"What temperature do you set the thermostat to throughout the year?"
OneFingerIn
"Haha this one always gets me as someone who needs low temps - you can always put on more clothes, I can't peel my skin off to get cooler."
djdante
The thermostat is a dealbreaker for me.
It's gonna be 60. Love it or move on.
Discovery
Blown Away Wow GIF by AminéGiphy"When was the last time you changed your mind about something?
"Opens a window to how they think."
youcantkillanidea
"If that was really early on in the dating I’d think it was a bit of a head-f**k question. I’d probably find that question a red flag, tone dependent, although I agree with the sentiment."
LivestockMarc
Personal Time
"Aside from major differences about finances, kids, politics, or religion, a big one is; What are your hobbies? If they don’t really have any, you may be the next hobby, which isn’t going to work unless you’ve got that kind of time. If the hobbies are time-consuming ones generally done with a SO."
"But you have no interest in them, that could be an issue as well. If only one of you likes camping, wanted to spend vacation lounging instead of exploring, didn’t like sports, etc either that partner is annoyed or the other feels like they don’t get to enjoy what they love."
Githard
Past Issues
"Ask them about their exes. If they think every single one of them is an a**hole... they are likely the real a**hole."
CantTakeMeSeriously
"I have mixed feelings about that - I've been in three previous relationships and all three were emotionally abusive towards me (one wasn't nearly as bad as the other two, though) in various ways. I know this is a common sentiment and it always makes me afraid that people won't believe me or something.
"I mean, I realize in your comment you said 'likely' and not '100% sure' and there's plenty of room for nuance."
phiore
Values
"I would try to take care of any dealbreakers. If I find out that she has different political values than I do, it's not going to work out in the long run, so I wouldn't bother. Same thing with other factors (religion, financial values, etc.). I would also ask how much cuddling she likes to engage in, as I prefer a lot."
SkullKrusher9000
Essentials
Tell Me More To Do List GIF by Disney ChannelGiphy"When I was dating my three essential questions were always kids, sex, and money. If you're not on the same wavelength for any of those three things, just don't even try."
KhaosElement
TRUTH PLEASE!!
"So, how much personal debt do you have?"
"Source: the guy who dated a woman with huge debts and was asked to pay for everything and then some".
"After that, I'd go with, 'Have you ever been diagnosed with borderline, narcissistic, or histrionic personality disorders?"
extracensorypower
The questions are basic.
Just ask for the truth.
Do you have any good Qs to add to the queue? Let us know in the comments below.
