Photo via Wikimedia Commons

You're in my house, you follow my rules. Well, long as your rules aren't TOTALLY inane.

We all had a friend growing up whose house we dreaded hanging out at. Why? ...Because their parents had some crazy rules. And if you didn't have that were that friend.

u/MajorWorldliness asked:

What are the strangest "house rules" you've seen in a person's house?

Here were some of the answers.

Major MIL Drama

My MIL has some major issues.

  1. There is a room just as you walk in the house that is completely off limits. It's vacuumed constantly and is a picturesque pink frilly sitting room, pink carpets, etc. Think Dolores Umbrage. My parents brought their dog over once (who is a fantastic chill dog) and she put a paw on the carpet and my MIL almost had an aneurysm.
  2. When my husband was growing up, he and his 2 brothers had 1 hour of screen time a day. TV, video games, whatever, 1 hour.
  3. 1 bath a week. If you had more than that you got screamed at. The brothers would end up showering at a friend's house. I had to basically train my husband out of that one.
  4. If you had too much fun doing something, they wouldn't let you do it anymore. It made my husband very good at lying and also very obsessive about things he enjoyed. Or, if you had too much fun in a weekend you weren't allowed to do something fun later in the weekend. I.e. visiting a friend's house on Saturday, weren't allowed to do anything on Sunday except clean or do yard work.
  5. Not allowed to argue with parents. Mom has a personality disorder and constantly lies. Dad always backs her up. She will lie about what the boys were doing and say they were breaking a rule when they weren't and they couldn't argue. (This rule is literally pinned to their wall)
  6. They have to get the parents cards for birthdays etc. But the cards are not allowed to be hand made because it's "cheap." This rule persists.
  7. Have to take pictures every Sunday before going to church, in the church outfits. There are hundreds of pictures of this, in the same spot in the house.

There are other rules I literally can't remember/pick out of the piles of abuse.

My husband and his brothers have grown up very well adjusted and sane based on this mess.


Dad's Seat

My friend David was a tough guy... which was all the more cool that he chose to hang out with a scrawny nerd like me.

We went back to his house, once (and only once)... which was literally 4 houses down the street from me.

It was a small, normal house, with a small comfortable living room.

When I plopped into the big easy chair, David went white as a ghost.

"that's my dad's chair." (pause)

"no one's allowed to sit there." (pause)


"if he sees you in his chair, he'll bring the belt."

Well, I was a small kid, but even I knew that some other person's parent wasn't going to be allowed to beat the shit out of ME with his belt. So I said, nonchalantly, "so what? He can't hit me."

My tough guy friend (and, truth be told, a bit of a bully to other kids) just got paler and paler.

Then he said (very quietly)

"he might not wallop you. but he'll wallop me instead."

I hopped off that chair like a shot.

And learned a sh*tload that day.


Carpet Path


One of my friends mother had some borderline obsessive rules. No walking on the carpets. You must remain on the strips of clear plastic carpet protectors instead, which were arranged to create walkways round the house. Guests must wear slippers, there were spares if you didn't bring your own. The leather sofas must remain completely covered in sheets to protect them. Even the dog was expected to follow these carpet protector paths and was constantly being told off for stepping off them.

I understand wanting to keep your carpets and furniture nice but this was crazy. You couldn't even see them under all this ugly protective stuff. Plus I nearly fell down the stairs wearing oversized slippers and tripping on this protective plastic mat that was draped down the staircase. I was also constantly getting in trouble for not following the correct route around the room and instead walking straight to where I wanted to be. She would literally check for footprints on the carpet.


It's Rude To Stair

Had a babysitter when I was about 8 and my sister was 5. The rule was all day we had to sit on the stairs. No couch, no kitchen table, nothing literally had to stay on the stairs the whole day (which was pretty f*cking uncomfortable even to my 8 year old body) and me and my sister were pretty well behaved so we did it without much question. When my mom would come pick us up and started talking for what seemed like forever, of course, we would get to sit on the couch. only years later did I realize how weird and sh*tty that was.


Medic Tales

I'm a medic, so we go into people's homes every day. We had a cardiac arrest, so we were working a man, and the wife was having a fit about the mess we were making.

Yes, there was some garbage from the pads, needles, meds, but we put all of it into our jump bag.

She was screaming at us about it. I told her that her husband was very sick and we were doing everything we could to help. She said she didn't care if he died as long as we didn't make a mess.


Sausage Time


My grandparents had a very specific order that food should be eaten. We're a big English family and tea would be served at 5pm or so, after lunch at 1pm. Plates and dishes would be placed on the dining room table all at once, but, could only be consumed in the correct order. Sandwiches first, then sausage rolls/assorted savouries, then sweet foods. It's only so strange, because after my generation (16 of us) my grandmother now couldn't give less of a shit, and all the rules are out of the window, especially for great grandchildren and our spouses. We're just pretty bitter that we would get such a telling off for eating a sausage roll before a sandwich, since now apparently you can have chocolate biscuits before 2pm. Anarchy.


Sheets And Incidents

So a few years back I was at a party and they home owner had a list of house rules on a chalk board. The one that sort of made me doubletake was "Overnight guests are asked not to masturbate."

I was a little confused, I mean nobody wants to think of someone else jerking it in their home, in their sheets, but that seems a little weird. Was there an incident that incited this?


Rules Rules Rules

I was in a foster home from ages 5 to 7. They were religious and the rules were as follows: women couldn't cut their hair, wear short sleeves after 5 years of age, could only wear dresses and nightgowns (even when swimming on vacation), and nobody could enter the home if wearing shorts. Pants were fine. The upside was the whole family ate dinner together every night and there was always dessert. As a kid coming from a home where food was not aplenty, I thought it was wonderful. I've stayed in touch over the years and went to the moms 80th birthday party last summer. Lots of people were there in shorts, so the rules have obviously been relaxed over the years. One daughter even had hair a little below her shoulders, so that rule isn't enforced, either.


The Garage Party


She wouldn't actually let us into the house.

She threw a housewarming party and we were all excited about attending, but instead she herded us all into her garage and locked us in there. There was a door in the garage that led into the kitchen that she would only unlock if someone wanted the bathroom. She would then escort the person to the toilet and stand outside the door until they were done, take them back to the garage and lock the door again. The garage was empty as well. Not even so much as a deck chair or box to sit on.

The guests did not stay long. I left in under an hour and the rest not long after. She was offended after she put so much "effort" into having us over.


Chores For Play

Anytime I was over at their house and we would go outside and play, I would have to knock on the door each time to come back in, even if I had been there for a while or if I had just walked in with their kid.

Their mother kept tabs on exactly how much I ate or drank while I was there and expected me to work for whatever they had given me.

I had accidentally left something by the door and I realized after I got a few steps away from their porch so I just opened the door and reached in to grab it. Her mother grabbed my arm and jerked me back into the house and screamed how I was a guest at their house and that I was to always knock before entering, how I was a rude child, she didn't care that I was just there and what I grabbed was mine etc. I had known this woman my entire life. We lived in the same neighborhood, she knew all of my extended family and treated me like I was some stranger.

That was my last day playing over there.


Not The Nirvana Tape!

I went to a private Christian school, which was actually a pretty great place for me and much better than the public schools I attended before that. But there were always a couple of super strict parents around school.

I never went to his house or talked to his parents, but this one kid came to school super tired one day with a horrible case of bed-head, wearing the same clothes he wore the day before. He said his parents found the Nirvana tape (this was the late 90's) he borrowed from one of the potheads at school and made him sleep in the back yard in a tent. He had to dig a hole to pis/shit in and he had to eat back there as well (they did bring him food, though). They weren't going to have their son listening to that devil music. I think he was in the back yard for a couple of weeks.


Really, Brenda? A Fire Drill?


I had a friend who's mother ran a daycare when we were 6 or 7. On having a play date at the house - she made us enact a fire drill. We had to crawl down the stairs on our bellies, with a wet towel over our heads while she screamed at us. There was some other stuff too. His older brother got wrapped in a duvet and dropped out of a first floor window. At the time I though it was awesome, but I told my Mother on returning home and wasn't allowed to play there again.


Modern Family, But Without The Modern

I was dating a girl just after high school, her family was one of those families, Modern Family type get-together-seven-nights-a-week families.

Went to her house for a weekend, I wasn't allowed to go smoke, because that would mean I'd be away from the group for too long.

I went to the toilet and I had been gone for like 4 minutes when I heard a little search party looking for me.

Wasn't allowed to go to bed when I was tired, it was like 2am.

Wasn't allowed to go into town (to wander around alone) on Saturday morning.

We spent the whole weekend together, like every minute.


Just Call Her Lady Tremaine

A friend of mine had a SUPER mean and strict step mother. Here are a few "rules" I can remember from her house.

She had to make her bed everyday, but the dust ruffle had to be so many inches from the floor and even around the bed. The sheets and comforter had to be done just so. If it wasn't she would come in and rip them all off the bed and make my friend redo it.

We were only allowed to play with one item at a time. For instance, if we wanted to play Barbies, we each were only allowed to take one out of the box at a time. If we wanted to switch out-say a child doll or a Ken doll, the Barbie had to get put back into the box.

They had phones in every room. The only phone I was ever allowed to use was in the creepy basement. Also we were only allowed to use the bathroom in the creepy basement which sucked since there was one right next to my friends room.

Last i can remember is that she was only allowed to have 1 friend allowed to play in the house. She was allowed to have 2 friends play in the backyard. Never anymore than two.


I AM The Island Of Misfit Toys


At one of my ex-girlfriend's house on Christmas day, both myself and my girlfriend's sister's boyfriend were told to go down into the basement while the rest of their (extended and immediate) family opened presents. I had never met this guy before and we were the only two people down there, all because the older members of the family didn't want "outsiders" to see what they had bought their relatives (did they think we were going to steal something?). There were something like 35 people in the house, so while I thought we would only be shunned for a few minutes, we ended up staying in the basement for TWO HOURS before my girlfriend called us back upstairs. Apparently the guy I was stranded with had been there for multiple Christmas celebrations, and was usually told to just go sit by himself. This was a normal thing for this family.

Joke's on them, though - I had a much better time playing pool with the guy than I ever would have interacting with their family, who I came to discover over time were really bitter, uncaring people.


The TP Struggle

A friend I visited a few times when I was a kid had really strange parents. One weird thing was when my mum called his mum to arrange a time, his mum said that she'd like it if I brought a shirt I'd already worn to their house. She said they had a rescue dog that lost its sh*t around new people and would keep it in the bathroom for my first visit, then put my shirt in its bed so it got used to my scent for next time. I f*cking did it too. Dog still went nuts.

There were wacky bathroom rules, like if I had to go she'd say "one or two?" Then she would carefully count the number of squares and hand it to me. This was particularly embarrassing since I had a little crush on my friend and he was always there to see me say what I had to do. It was never enough, I always, always ended up poking a finger through the TP and they never had soap! I had to wash my fucking hands with shampoo, once it was dog shampoo.

Lol I hated it there.


Image by Karen Warfel from Pixabay

If you're looking for your soulmate, it can be hard to really gauge who is truly “the one", especially if they've had back luck in the past. Trust me, it took many attempts to figure my romantic life out before finding my husband. But when you know, you know--and once you do, everything just beautifully falls into place.

Anyone that has found their soulmate usually can pinpoint the moment they had this realization. Here are a few real-life stories.

DeepDarkSiege asked: How did you know you found the one?

Sometimes it’s truly the usually mundane things that lights up your romantic life. In the words of the musical Company, “it’s the little things you do together that make perfect relationships.”

​The true test of any relationship.

When I found myself enjoying the little things - just because I was doing them with her.

Grocery shopping, running errands, just the mundane stuff that makes up every day.


My husband will wander off in the grocery store and then peek around the corner of an aisle at me and say weird stuff like "hey lady" or "looking good" or just nonsensical screeching. Or he will come up and smack my butt and run off. It's so immature but I always crack a smile.


This is so important!

Peanut Butter Animation GIF by Jif Giphy

I realized that if I happened to be doing or experiencing something fun, I always wanted her around to share it with. That, and we argue well and don't hold grudges.


I love the fact that me and my GF resolve arguments like mature adults and we never stay mad at each other.


​You feel like an old shoe.

Everything feels effortless.


This sums it up exactly. So many of my friends and family stay in failing relationships for so long. Everything is fraught with drama and disagreement.

On my 2nd date with my now wife I told her 'You feel like an old shoe.' Comfortable and familiar, easy to get along with, happy to talk with for hours or enjoy hours of silence together. When the fights happen they are brief and uncontentious, and there's no lingering bitterness. Also, she totally understood and accepted the romanticism of being called an Old Shoe.


Chemistry is one of the most important elements of a relationship (accidental pun there).

​There is always hope.

Initial chemistry. I was doing the on-line dating thing, and had been on a dozen+ dates of varying degrees of awkwardness and disaster. I was fed up with it.

I logged onto the dating site to delete my account and embrace the Billy-no-dates life, when this woman gave me a nudge. I was kind of blunt and said I was done with it all, and didn't want to go through another 2 to 3 weeks of on-line chat only to meet up and have nothing to talk about.

I said if she wanted to meet up and name the place fine. If she found that too forward and a red-flag then also fine. She said she'd also experienced similar problems and also wanted to skip straight to the IRL meet.

I am not that chatty. But we met up at about 2pm at a local pub. We were there until kicking-out at 11pm. It flew. I had a sore throat by the end of it.

A few weeks ago we celebrated our 10 year wedding anniversary.


So sweet.

couples love GIF Giphy

The chemistry between us was unreal, my wife said the first time she met me she had the overwhelming urge to hug me. 18 years later we're still awesome together.

She just always says as soon as she first saw me she knew we were meant to be together. We often read each others minds, I can heal her with my hands when she has pain and the sex even after 3 kids and 18 years together is still like being a pair of teenagers.

She's my best friend, my soul mate and my lover. I would love to be a millionaire then I could just spend every minute of every day with her forevermore. I'm blessed.


Sappy, but sweet.

I can fall asleep when he's cuddled with me. As someone that hasn't had the best relationships, it's the first time I've felt safe enough to just let myself be at rest. The first time I saw him (we were long distance for 6 months), my whole being felt at peace.

Yes it's sappy as heck, but honestly this is the first time feeling this way.


That’s how you know.

Meeting my spouse felt like seeing a loved one after they'd been gone on a long trip. I felt the same way when our child was born. No magical Disney moment, just 'oh, there you are. I've missed you and I'm glad you're back.'


Not to mention the bigger gestures that truly blow you away as their partner.

Thrown into the deep end.​

Introduce Season 2 GIF by The Bold Type Giphy

I am extremely lucky, as my father and I are absolutely best buds. He was diagnosed with cancer and it quickly spread throughout his body. He has been slowly declining over time. I know I found the one when my then-boyfriend (now fiancé) came to meet my parents.

Low and behold they were throwing me a surprise party and he got introduced to 30 family members. He was thrown into the deep end! He was kind and respectful to everyone. But what really took the cake was he sat down and talked to my otherwise very gruff, but long-winded dad. He talked to him for 2 hours, about life, love, my dad's experiences and I saw my dad give a few loud long laughs. It was rare those days.

He's remained close with my father as he nears the end and his constant effort to create memories and bring my dad joy speaks so much about who he is as a person.

We are getting married next week and I couldn't have found a more goofy, kind, loving and respectful man.


What an amazing person.

I knew she was the one when my best friend who was a father figure went to the hospital and his organs were failing. They gave him 2 days to live and it all happened to fast that I called her and said we'd have to cancel our dinner plans with her mom (I was crying on the phone explaining why) all she said was "which hospital" and I told her the location.

I got there before her and held my dads hand. This diamond of a woman comes in with a chimichanga and large Fanta orange soda, no ice (my favorite) she sits right next to me and feeds me as I am holding my dying friend's hand crying hysterically. While he was loaded up on morphine she made a smart ass crack to me and actually made him chuckle. It was a half chuckles but he heard her! I will marry this woman. Mark my words.


A good partner always does this.

Knowing this person passively inspired me to be a better person, try harder in my efforts, and take risks to push myself as well as enjoy my life. I realized they were "the one" when they felt the same way.


As for me, I knew my husband was the one when I realized I never got sick of his company. Usually, I get exhausted being around people, and I need a break. I never have with him--he's just such a delight to be around.

And if you haven't found the one and this article is making you sad, don't lose hope. Everyone's timeline is different, and you never know when you will meet your soulmate. Don't lose hope--it'll come when you least expect it


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