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What season of quarantine are we even in?

Quarantine feels like it started ten years ago. March feels like another decade. And we have gone through so much media, so many hobbies, and so many other things when we had no choice but to be alive and exist.

Not all of them were the most productive.



u/SpiritualStew asked:

What's the saddest thing you've done to pass time in quarantine?

Here were some of those answers.

Oppressed By A Cricket

The shutdown wasn't a problem. I played out my usual life, just with the new theme of 'curbside pickups' and so on. Wearing a mask to quickly pick up groceries, and so on.

However, my roommate tested positive for Coronavirus after the shutdown ended, just as I was getting reaccustomed to socially distant, but mostly normal life, and was able to move to her new apartment safely during the process. I tested negative, but still have to isolate.

The day after I went in for my 'brain biopsy' (the coronavirus/flu test where they put the thing so far back you start forgetting numbers) a cricket figured out a hiding place in my now single-person home.


At this point, I'm already looking pretty haggard. Longest hair I've had since high school, and I'm in isolation rather than quarantine, so I'm already a little out of sorts.

This cricket. I've gone from a fairly 'together' working at home professional, to a wild-eyed, scraggly dude slowly stalking through his house half-naked at all hours of any day to try to echolocate this chirping motherf***er.

I think I got him on my last run, but I'm just waiting to wake up to it again. I'm ready for quarantine to be over.

Crimsonial

Nev Wasn't Prepared For This

I spent a few days talking to an obvious catfish on kik just because it felt good to hear somebody say nice things to me and allowed me to pretend that someone likes me

thugjedi

We Can At Least Go Outside

Back in March when my country was in full lockdown I used to take walks on Google street view. I'd put my headphones on and just go around my town for a while because I really wanted to see the normal world again. It was almost working too.

Horatio-Hufnagel

Sleep, Rinse, Repeat

I'd wake up from some crazy vivid dream that was not so much a nightmare as deeply disturbing and I'd get up to get my head right, then realise I'd only been asleep for 3 hours so go back to bed and have some other mad trauma thrown at me by my mind, rinse and repeat.

Some days I'd get up and go back to bed 4 times over the course of 24 hours. Sometimes I'd be up for 36 hours at a stretch, other times sleeping 20 hours of the day.

The weird vivid dreams have stopped now. The lockdown experience was something that deeply affected me. During the lockdown I got the best job of my life (working as a developer on a popular VR title) and also managed to lose my mind and the job when I spiralled into depression mid-summer and had to step down because I wasn't in a fit state to do anything.

MrSpindles

Nom Nom Nom

I consumed a bowl of water with a chopstick to show myself that I could overcome anything if I just applied myself. It took an hour and half and I learned nothing.

But on the bright side, I made a new friend; his name is Surface Tension.

altenoca

Virtual Nightlife

My friends and I built our local bars in Minecraft. And one night we all gathered in the bar and sat at the table while drinking irl. Then we'd move on to the next bar.

We also went on Red Dead 2, went to the saloon and played poker and drank. We would bet real money. That one was actually pretty fun.

cowpool20

Treatchoself

Cried myself to sleep because i just couldn't take being in the house and having to deal with taking care of everything in the house.

But i was ok after that day since my parents decided to take me to get a haircut for the first time in 4 months, felt nice after. Treat y'all selves yo something good once in a while

Ael0405

Ummm....

Ended up super sore from taking all these nudes at weird angles during a sexting marathon with a friend. Neither of us had anything better to do than choket he chicken. There's no way I was the only one sore the next day. We were just so desperate for anything.

The worst part is that since we're both 18 and still live at home, his dad ended up walking in on him and seeing both pictures of my naked @$ and his son's umm... interesting sexual fantasies. He's grounded now.

afewbaddecisions

Standardized Food

I wanted McDonalds, but I wanted to see if the meal would taste super weird if I got each individual item from a different location... So I got a full meal from one McDonalds and then went to 6 different McDonalds after that.

They tasted the same.

DisneyMusicSlaps

Social Media: A Curse

Drunkenly reactivated Facebook after several months without because I was feeling lonely. Made an embarrassing mopey post about how frustrating it is that distancing oneself from social media voids your social identity, and that it's become apparent who is actually a friend and what's just the Facebook facade.

True frustrations, cringey execution. Hit that deactivate again the next morning. Other than that, too many naps and too much Reddit.

ImpatientOctopus

Image by Anemone123 from Pixabay

Life is hard. It's a miracle to make it through with some semblance of sanity. We are all plagued by grief and trauma. More and more people of all backgrounds are opening up about personal trauma and its origins. Finally! For far too long we've been too silent on this topic. And with so many people unable to afford mental health care, the outcomes can be damaging.

All of our childhoods have ups and downs and memories that can play out like nightmares. We carry that, or it follows us and the first step in recovery is talking about it. So who feels strong enough to speak?

Redditor u/nthn_thms wanted to see who was willing to share about things they'd probably rather forget, by asking:

What's the most traumatizing thing you experienced as a child?
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Image by klimkin from Pixabay

Being single can be fun. In fact, in this time of COVID, being single can save lives. But the heart is a fickle creature.

And being alone can really suck in times of turmoil. None of us are perfect and it feels like that's all anyone is looking for... perfect.

Now that doesn't mean that all of us are making it difficult to partner up. Sure, some people are too picky and mean-spirited, but some of the rest of us are crazy and too much to handle. So one has to be sure.

The truth is, being single is confusing, no matter how much we try to match. So let's try to understand...

Redditor u/Mcxyn wanted to discuss some truths about love and our own issues, by asking:

Why are you single?
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Tiard Schulz/Unsplash

Whether you're an at home parent, a college student just leaving the nest, or a Food Network junkie, there are a few basic tips that everyone should know.

Chef's gave us some of their top tips for amateurs and beginner at home cooks that will really make a difference. They are trained professionals with years of experience in the kitchen, so they definitely know what we're all missing.

If you're looking to improve some of your cooking skills and techniques, but you're still learning how to boil water correctly, this list is for you.

Redditor BigBadWolf44 wanted in on the secrets and asked:

"Chefs of Reddit, what's one rule of cooking amateurs need to know?"

Let's learn from the masters!


What a common mistake!

"A lot of the time when people add salt to a dish because they think it tastes flat, what it really needs is an acid like lemon juice or vinegar."

- Vexvertigo

"Instructions unclear I drugged my dinner party guests and now they're high on acid."

- itsyoboi_human

"Yes! Or tomatoes. They're pretty acidic too and go with so many things. Our dinners are so much better once the garden tomatoes are ripe. Or if a dish is too acidic, oil/butter or a little sugar can help add balance to it."

- darkhorse85

"Like tomato and eggs. Every Chinese mom makes those slightly differently and I haven't had a tomato egg dish I didn't like yet."

- random314

"There's a book called 'Salt Fat Acid Heat' that comes highly recommended to amateur cooks."

- Osolemia

"Reading even just the first chapter about salt made a lot of food I cooked immediately better, because I finally understood salt wasn't just that thing that sat on the dinner table that you applied after the meal was cooked."

- VaultBoy42

"Salt is important for sweets. A batch of cookies without that little hint of salt doesn't taste quite right."

- Osolemia

Unfortunately, this tip might not be accessible to everyone. Many people who contracted COVID can no longer use their sense of smell the way they used to.

"Have a friend that lost his smell from COVID, and now he only recognizes if food is salty, sweet, sour or bitter."

- AlphaLaufert99

"Just wait until he gets his sense of smell back and a ton of foods smell like ammonia or literal garbage now. Yeah, that's fun... It's been 7 months for f*cks sake just let me enjoy peanut butter again!!!!!!!!!"

- MirzaAbdullahKhan

You can't take back what you've already put in.

"You can always add, but you cannot take away."

- El_Duende666

"I find people's problems usually are they're too scared to add rather than they add too much."

- FreeReflection25

"I see you also grew up white in the mid-west."

- Snatch_Pastry

Safety first!

"Not really a cooking tip, but a law of the kitchen: A falling knife has no handle."

- wooddog

"I'm always so proud of my reflexes for not kicking in when I fumble a knife."

"If I drop anything else, my stupid hands are all over themselves trying to catch it (and often failing). But with a knife the hardwired automatic reaction is jump back immediately. Fingers out of the way, feet out of the way, everything out of the way. Good lookin out, cerebellum!"

- sonyka

"Speaking of KICKING in. On first full time cooking job I had a knife spin and fall off the counter. My (stupid) reflex was to put my foot under it like a damn hacky sack to keep it from hitting the ground. Went through the shoe, somehow between my toes, into the sole somehow without cutting me. Lessons learned: (1) let it fall; (2) never set a knife down close to the edge or with the handle sticking out; (3) hacky sack is not nearly as cool as it could be."

- AdjNounNumbers

"Similarly, NEVER put out a grease or oil fire with water. Smother with a lid or dump baking soda in there (do not use flour, as it can combust in the air making things worse)."

- Metallic_Substance

How else will you know it tastes good?

"Taste the food."

- OAKRAIDER64

"Also don't be afraid to poke and prod at it. I feel like people think the process is sacred and you can't shape/flip/feel/touch things while you cook them. The more you are hands on, the more control you have."

"No, this does not include situations where you are trying to sear something. Ever try flipping a chicken thigh early? That's how you rip a chunk out of it and leave it glued to the pan until it's burnt."

- Kryzm

Here's one just for laughs.

"When you grab a pair of tongs, click them a few times to make sure they are tongs."

- Kolshdaddy

"People really overlook this one. You've gotta tong the tongs a minimum of 3 times to make sure they tong, or else it can ruin the whole dish."

- BigTimeBobbyB

If you're looking to get into cooking or to improve you technique, pay attention to these few tips.

Salt generously, add an acid to brighten things up, and don't forget to taste your food!

If all else fails, you can always order take out.

Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

Victoria_Borodinova/Pixaba

As part of the learning process, children often do embarrassing things before they learn a little more about the world and all the different implications therein. While the inappropriate moment is usually minor and ends in laugher some instances are truly mortifying.

One such instance involved a little sister who was around 6 at the time. It was the 90s and at the height of the youth-focused PSAs (think the frying egg representing your brain). One type was a safety PSA about stranger danger. The speaker would remind the children that if a stranger tried to take you anywhere to yell “Stop, you're not my mommy/daddy" to raise the alarm.

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