Ugh, family, why do you always need to bring that up?
Kids say and do the darndest things, which we know, considering our families won't let anything we have ever said or done in our childhood die. But there's always that one darn thing which nobody can ever get over. You know what yours is.
u/HarmonJames asked:
What is that "one thing" you did as a child that still gets brought up to this day?
Here were some of the answers.
The Home Video Is An Evil Tool
GiphyWhen I was really little I was running around in a family friend's yard. I was still potty training and had the "pull down your pants" part of going to the bathroom down pat, but hadn't quite mastered the "find a toilet" part. So I just drop my pants and poop on the grass. The best part is they were taking a video at the time, so now they have a home movie of me taking a crap in their yard. It's been 25 years and everyone still makes fun of me for it.
I'm Makin' Waffles
When I was about 4 my parents were taking about Bill Gates, or someone else super rich, and I said very insightfully, "I bet he can eat at Waffle House any time he wants to."
I think it stemmed from me constantly begging to go to Waffle House and my mom always saying, "We don't have the money to eat at Waffle House everyday!"
I just assumed money was THE ONLY reason I couldn't eat there everyday.
Medical School For 7 Year Olds
When I was 7 my neighbor had a heart attack. I felt like I could have helped prevent it because I had saw a commercial advertising bayer aspirin and how it kept your heart healthy or something. I thought the doctors didn't know about this miracle drug. From that day on, I wrote down every medicine commercial with a brief description of what the medicine did. One day at dinner my brother was complaining his hands were dry and itchy. I ran to get my notepad and told him he should try vagisil.
Determination
When going on long car journeys we would often have to use hillside routes and the like (rural Ireland), when going over a steep hill at speed it always gave a funny feeling in my stomach. As a child I proceeded to shout with utmost determination "Dad my willy is scared!".
They tell everyone this story....
Well Howdy Doo To You Too
GiphyWhen I was 4, I guess I was having a real bad morning. I came out of my parents room after I had woken up and went out to the living room where I sat down in my personal toddler-sized chair and stared straight ahead at the TV, not saying a word to my then stay-at-home dad who was already up watching TV after my mom had gone to work. He changed the channel to Spongebob just for me. he then proceeded to tell me good morning, to which I replied "f*ck off."
To this day he still has no idea how I heard that, though he assumes he heard my mom say it to him during an argument they were having. He tells that story to anyone he gets the chance to tell.
Accidentally Sold Out Our Friend
So, my parents had a nanny suite in our old house. They decided to let a family friend who was retired live in there and be our nanny rent free. They also paid her a few hundred dollars every two weeks. She was a pensioner.
So, I was about 4 and she used to bring me out on her adventures. What my parents didn't know was that she was a secret lush. She used to bring me to a bar midday. The barfly's found me entertaining. They would buy me ice cream if I sang "How much is that dog in the window?" As a 4 year old I found this perfectly acceptable I got to sing and free ice cream. My parents never knew because nothing bad ever happened to me.
After we sold the house and I was about 8 we walked by the bar and I go that's where I used to sing for ice cream. My parents asked what I meant and i told them. They were horrified at first and asked me if anything bad ever happened and i said no.
I'm 35 and still haven't lived it down.
You Sit On A Throne Of Lies
When I was three, in the midst of the 80s kidnapping scare and the Christmas shopping season, I decided I was going to go see Santa. While my dad was in line to buy my mom's Christmas present, I went to see Santa without him.
My parents, of course, freaked out, but they found me happily watching Santa because I knew I wasn't lost. I was going to see Santa, duh.
When they talked about it when I was older, the thing that stood out the most to them was my sense of direction was really good for a three-year-old.
There They Are A-Standing In A Row
My grandparents were flying back in from overseas but their flight got delayed. I was about 6 at the time and a massive The Lion King fan. I decided to provide some entertainment for my family so I got up on these half walls that were in the centre of the airport and just started singing at the top of my lungs "I'VE GOT A LOVELY BUNCH OF COCONUTS" with some pretty elaborate dance moves - including golden spirit fingers. My parents couldn't stop laughing, and neither could everyone else in the airport. Haven't lived it down.
Valiant Effort
My younger sister- we were watching some discovery channel documentary on marine life. Anyway, at one point, she turns to my mom and said "did you see that?" Mom's like, "no.. what?" Sister says "on TV... the animal there" Mom asks which animal. My little sister says "you know... (and then whispers) the octa-c**chie"
My sister was afraid to say octopus because she knew "pus" was a bad word.
We still talk about it to this day. To the point that I have since moved across the country and my husband and my friends all refer to an octopus as a "you know... an octa-c**chie"
No Moose For You
GiphySo I don't know if anyone has ever been to the Bugaboo Creek but essentially it's a restaurant with a bunch of talking animals on the walls. As a kid I went there on my birthday cause I loved animals and shit.
But what they don't advertise is that for birthdays they bring out this big moose puppet on one of the waiters arms and want you to kiss the moose.
7 year old me did NOT want anything to do with this puppet and I instantly shut down into tears yelling "I don't wanna kiss the moose"
Nearly 20 years later I am still haunted by the memory as my family constantly reminds me of my most infamous whine.
I don't wanna kiss the moose.
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays
I was running a rolled up napkin back and forth through a candle flame. The napkin caught fire, so I threw it into a plastic Solo cup which, of course, proceeded to catch fire as well. My aunt grabbed the cup and tossed it into the sink.
The charred remains of the cup with a burned napkin inside were put on an ornament hanger and is hung on our family Christmas tree every year. The shame that keeps on giving.
Cañada
A lot of klutzy stuff.
Walked into door frames. Got a tooth knocked out by a wiffle ball bat. Took a different wiffle ball directly to the nose. Slid to home plate in a backyard game of kickball, ate the edge of the table. Broke my arm with a parked car. Tried to reach under a table to grab a fork, slipped underneath, then stood up under it. Got stuck 6ft off the ground the first time I climbed a tree. Broke a toe playing soccer barefoot.
A silly thing I asked. Mum explained the technical science reason for how someone gets pregnant when I was nearly 3. She explained women have eggs, that turn into babies. My first question was, "where's your nest?" Followed up by "you said you have eggs. So where is your nest??"
One of my brother tricked me into believing that Canada was pronounced Kuh-nay-dee-uh. I believed it until I was 14.
-Jaws Theme-
GiphyI watched Jaws a lot. I was 4 or 5 and my dad was called in for a shift at the police department he worked at as a part time job. It was early evening and my mom said, "What do you want to do tonight, Fightinscot?". My reply, "Wanna get drunk and fool around?".
Runner up, I was two and a half and my mom was potty training me one afternoon. I guess she kept telling me to go potty and we would go to grandma and grandpa's house afterwards. After a few minutes of being told to use the bathroom, I looked her in the eyes and said, "Piss off, bitch.". My mom swears I heard my dad say it, dad swears I heard it from my mom.
Never Forget What Never Was
I had a nightmare as a kid that my family burnt in a fire, and I cried enough tears to finally put the fire out, and then had to mop the tears up because it flooded the house. This was 100% not real btw. My mum dropped me off for school and I was still shaken up by the nightmare so I started crying. The teacher asked what was wrong and I said my family burnt to death. Immediately all the teachers were concerned, asking me was I okay. As the day went on, I forgot about my nightmare and was a happy kid again. The teachers were like wtf. Why is this child so happy? When my mum came to pick me up from school they asked her was she okay, and then my mum explained the whole situation. This happened when I was like 6/7.
I'm 20 now and people still talk about the time they died in a fire.
I Gave You What You Asked For
I was probably 10-12 at the time, but I used to go to local hockey games with my aunt.
One night, I was sent to the food stand to get hot dogs. She wanted "just a little bit of mustard", so I put exactly one dot of mustard on her hot dog. She thought it was absolutely hilarious.
It's been 30 years and I am reminded of it every time I visit family.
Ah To Be An Actor At Three
I was probably about 3, very dramatic, and The Little Rascals had become one of my favorite movies. At the grocery store with my mom and she wouldn't let me have something I asked for, so in my best Darla voice I loudly asked "ARE YOU ASHAMED OF ME??" and watched my mom turn bright red as everyone in the aisle turned around.
Also when I was about 6, I had seen a commercial for a movie (can't remember what it was) where the MIL(?) was crazy obsessed with cats and meeting her SIL(?) for the first time. So when my uncle introduced me to his now wife, I repeated after the lady on tv and said "You can call me pussy now." Everyone laughed, I laughed, but the joke was lost on me until years later.
I guess I watched too much tv as a kid lol
"What companies shamelessly make sh*t products, year after year?"
False Advertising
"Holiday gift basket companies."
"I once felt obliged to buy one from a lady I worked with and it cost around fifty dollars."
"She had a brochure with various baskets and I chose one that was assorted candies and had a decorative wooden rocking horse."
"When it arrived it was just a bag of candy that I could have paid 35 cents for at a gas station."- Artai55a
30 rock gift basket GIFGiphySave A Few Cents For Inferior Quality
"It’s a throwback, but rose art for sure."
"They just decided their destiny was to sit on the shelf next to Crayola and get purchased by folks who are balling on a budget or cheap."
"No goals for product improvement at all."
"Just 'hey, wanna save three bucks?'"- Lucetti
Improvements Unlikely In This Digital Age
"Any printer manufacturer."- gbeegz
"HP printers."
"I have a $600 fancy laser HP printer we got six or seven years ago, and they have succeeded in updating the software to the point that nothing works anymore."
"I used to be able to print over Wi-Fi easily, scan over Wi-Fi, etc and now none of it works."
"I haven't changed any of my network hardware, things are hardwired."
"Also, I used to be able to use aftermarket ink cartridges and the printer has started giving me sh*t about it."
"I really like HP's computers, but their printers are a bunch of bullsh*t."
"Oh and their auto-update software won't go away even though I keep disabling/ removing it, and it installs software updates that breaks the current functions."- Bazirker
It's The Customer Service You Pay For...
"Oracle."
"Products intentionally sh*tty so they can make most of their money selling consulting just to make it, sort of, work."- s-starr
One Reason Sports Should Always Be Played Outside
"EA sports titles."- Stitches_Ito
Even Carrie Bradshaw Doesn't Like Shoe Shopping THAT Much...
"Doc Martens."
"My old pair from 20 years ago are still going strong, any new pair I get craps out after a year."- korar67
Doc Martens Shoes GIF by SORANGiphyScreaming For Ice Cream... And Not In A Good Way...
"Breyers and their 'Frozen Dairy Dessert' nonsense."
"Before 2006, Breyers ice cream was really good!"
"I loved their coffee ice cream!"
"And then they changed their formula and made the mess they have now to the point that they can't even legally call it ice cream anymore."
"Does anyone remember those old Breyers commercials where the kid tries to read the ingredients on an inferior product and struggles to pronounce things like 'mono & diglycerides' and then easily reads Breyers ingredients as 'milk, sugar, and cream?'"
"What a joke."
"Unilever loves to buy brands people trust for quality products and use that trusted brand name to get people to buy lower quality for higher prices."
"It seriously has the same consistency as Cool Whip now."
"And Unilever has the audacity to say that this is what customers asked for!"- akittyafterus
World Cup Wow GIF by FIFAWho Exactly Is His Audience?
"If lockpickinglawyer is anything to go on its lock-companies."- knatten555
Literally Selling Sh*t...
"Home Depot has been selling manure since its founding in 1978."
"In fact, a quick search of the website found they proudly sell over 178 manure products."- atomicscateboard
The Original "Catfishers"...
"Mad Catz got away with murder for years."- Einar_47
Apple Is Listening...
"Samsung appliances."
"F*CK YOUR FIRMWARE UPDATE ON THE FRIDGE!"
"Also those plastic trays keep breaking and are sh*t quality."
"My 1987 Maytag is still cranking the coldest brews on earth and hasn't been serviced ever in its life and sits in a dark room in my basement since he was demoted from the kitchen for being out of fashion by my wife."- zendor666
Customers Weren't Looking For An Authentic "Frontier" Experience...
"Frontier Airlines."
"Sh*t experience, customer service, quality, reliability, comfort, convenience and fees."- Micklikesmonkeys
There are those who always like to give second chances whenever possible.
When it comes to spending a little more money for a more reliable product, however, customers should rightfully be one and done.
Redditor AdonisBlackwood wanted everyone to share about the spooky things they've seen or experienced, so they asked:
"What paranormal activities have you witnessed?"
I hear things in my house.
At all hours.
Whispers. Clangs. Clacks.
And at night... there is a shadow.
Flying Foods
Chef Cooking GIFGiphy"A package of corn tortillas literally jumped off the shelf and onto the floor once at a large grocery store right in front of me. They did not slide nor did they fall. There was no one else around. I thought it was a sign to make enchiladas or something but it was also quite frightening."
_perl_
At Home
"Lights turning off/on. Items flying off of shelves/counters. One time when I was home at night by myself, I saw something move out of the corner of my eye. I looked over and the bottom of one half of my scarf that I had draped over the top of my bathroom door was suspended at a 20-degree angle, including the tassels in midair. At this point, so many things were happening in my apartment (including physical welts down my back) that I was terrified to be in it."
"I ended up getting dressed and going outside the building before I broke down crying and called my grandma to come to pick me up. At a different time, my friend and I were outside the building smoking when we heard what sounded like someone thrashing my apartment. I'm talking chairs being smashed into walls, shelves being tipped over. I was the only person living in the building at the time."
"We raced upstairs to catch whoever it was but not a single thing was moved in my apartment and all the other units were locked (I checked). I never saw a ghost, apparition, shadow, etc. When we first moved in, everyone hated coming into our building. They said it felt off. My ex and I never felt that way at first and thought everyone was exaggerating."
"By the time I moved, I wouldn't speak about ghosts or watch anything remotely paranormal in my apartment. Eventually, I watched the Paranormal Activities at a friend's and cannot describe the chill I felt. Similar things were happening in my own home. Haven't experienced anything like it since I moved."
ElectronicDiscoBeans
Louder & Louder
"Not sure if this is considered paranormal, but when I get fevers as a child, I would always, in my fugue and pain-infused state, hear a man counting in a very deep voice. He would count from 1 and up; as the numbers get larger, the voice gets louder and more intense."
"It started to get less frequent as I grew older and now I do not experience it anymore. I've brushed it aside as a recurring nightmare until only recently, I've learned that my sister would experience the exact same thing when she was younger as well. It's not the scariest thing, but it does send shivers down my spine trying to comprehend this."
Issualave
I Froze
"I work in a cemetery. One evening I stayed late to do some catch-up work. I was taking pictures of some granite samples to have on my phone and had already locked up. I was alone. As I was holding my phone, I heard the doorway to the basement swing open, slam shut, and heard footsteps go down the stairs. I froze."
"I thought for sure someone had come in. I called out to see if it was someone from maintenance. No reply. I got scared because if it wasn’t them someone had broken in. I stayed still for a bit and listened then called out again. Nothing. Finally, I got brave enough to look. No one was there. I peeked down in the basement, empty. All the doors were still locked."
DannyPantsgasm
Face to Face
The Shining Halloween GIF by This GIF Is HauntedGiphy"At least once every couple of years, I'll be walking around the apartment at night, when it's dark, but I can still see enough to get around, and I'll have some shadow/figure type thing suddenly come out of nowhere and get right up in my face, so close that I can feel like I'm breathing on it. It disappears immediately after."
coldshadow31
I am convinced that every home is haunted.
We mortals just have to adjust.
In the Stars
"One night me, my dad, and a friend of his were standing outside watching the stars."
Carl Sagan Space GIF by Feliks Tomasz KonczakowskiGiphy"After a bit of watching, what appeared to be a shooting star made a sudden and sharp 90-degree turn and then kept going for about 15 seconds and then did an equally sharp and sudden 90-degree turn to disappear a few seconds later. We all saw the same thing, but none of us had a good explanation of what we saw."
JonaJonaL
Grandma
"My brother was on the phone once with his gf when she started saying that she could hear some old lady asking my brother for a glass of water. There was nobody around him so he ignored it but she kept on insisting. He hung up the phone and went to check on our grandma who was in her bedroom and found her dead. Fast forward a couple of years, around 11 pm, I was on the phone with a girl when I saw a guy on a bicycle go past (phone was by the windowsill. Same spot as my brother)."
"That's when I noticed she stopped talking and asked her if she was still there. She apologized as she thought I got into trouble. I said no and asked why she said that and she replied with someone was telling me to 'stop talking on the phone, it's late. Go to bed.' I was on my own, everybody in the house was already asleep."
"I asked her if it was an old lady and she said yes. Told her it was my grandma and that the same thing happened to my brother. She started talking about ghosts and stuff so I told her I'm hanging up and bolted into my room."
ghentres
The humanoid shadow figure
"One time I woke up in the middle of the night and I checked my phone to see the time, and then as I was about to lay down and close my eyes I checked in front of me and a huge tall humanoid shadow figure was standing there blocking the view of a broken wall clock and I just started panicking and it still was there after many seconds and eventually it just disappeared after I looked away from it for a second."
AppleIsTheBest124
In the Ravine
"My family's old house backed onto a pretty substantial, forested ravine. I slept on the ground-level floor, and my room was at the back of the house. On 4 separate occasions, over the span of 5 years, I saw a middle-aged man dressed in a flannel shirt, blue jeans, and a red hat walk through my room with a dog leash in his hand."
"He would briefly stop at the same spot every time, and look around, then keep walking towards the ravine. I should note that this was fairly new construction in a suburb of a small city, and all that had been there previously was a forest."
"I think he lost his dog in the ravine at some point, and he was there trying to find it."
mikeytruelove
Gettysburg
Whoopi Goldberg Comedy GIFGiphy"I saw a ghost sleeping in the same bed as my brother at a bed-n-breakfast in Gettysburg."
ccottonball
"Gettysburg has such an oppressive heavy feeling in the air. It's absolutely beautiful but it reminds me of the home I grew up in VA in the Bull Run Battlefield."
Chichi_lovesme
The ghosts of war are always in unrest.
Well, most ghosts in general are in unrest.
And they clearly visit often.
Customer service jobs are not for the faint of heart.
Dealing with people at their angriest and rudest does not breed a positive work environment.
Customer service can be a downright toxic job.
And if it's not the customers setting your spirit on fire, it's the companies themselves.
Some companies seem to revel in creating discontent.
That's why these types of jobs have such high turnover.
Redditor Psychological-Name15 wanted the customer service reps out there to give us some truths, so they asked:
"Customer service workers of Reddit, what secret can you reveal from your former company?"
I want to know about the inner workings of Comcast!!
I loathe them!
Oh Dear
Jennifer Lopez Smh GIF by American IdolGiphyI used to work in tech support for Citi Bank. The people working there are not intelligent. My favorite interaction went like this..."
"Banker - How do I type the upside down I?"
"Me - Ma'am, that's an exclamation point."
slappy_mcslapenstein
The Crappy People
"In every CS job I’ve ever had: we will bend over backward to help a nice person. We will expedite any complaint, give maximum compensation, and harass other areas of the business for you."
"We will do the absolute bare minimum to help a shi**y person and if you’re really bad, we will do everything in our power to make sure you get nothing but what you’re legally entitled to and it will be a process to get that."
11catsinahumansuit
"I don’t work in CS but 100% the same for us in IT a nice person will get new stuff while a shi**y person will get questionable secondhand crap that will take 12 months to fix! I will make sure that you wait as long as humanely possible to have anything fixed!"
Sharp-Demand-6614
Go to Holiday Inn
"If you ask for a supervisor calling Marriott you will just get another person who is not a supervisor, but say they are."
cryptnificent
"Yep. I've seen this done numerous times across multiple industries. Usually, it only involves an actual sup if it's a genuine problem or if they want to make a point."
"The last job I had was in towing junk cars. Two of the inside buyers, one male, and one female, would bounce that sup card around constantly. Idk how no one ever put it together. We'd get repeat callers and repeat sellers so I don't know."
ItsBobFromLumbridge
Heartless
"Worked at a contracted call center for Centrelink. The manager told us to deny as many emergency payments as possible and they would back us no matter what. They were actively working towards a culture that despised the callers and churned staff to get heartless right-wingers who hated the poor."
Rizza1122
"I feel ya. My best mate is a quadriplegic. Centrelink denied his disability pension because he wasn’t disabled enough."
Less-Storage
Go to Home Depot
You Are Dumb Patrick Star GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy"I worked at Lowes. I didn't know anything about anything in the electrical department yet that's where they put me without any training."
Eattherich187
Not training people is not just a Lowes thing.
There are too many unqualified people doing too many things.
Switcharoo
Drag Race What GIF by TAZOGiphy"Can confirm it's an unwritten policy for deli departments in Coles Supermarkets to change the written expiry dates on their tickets so they can sell out-of-code products at full price."
A Little Sunshine
"I worked at a call center for the billing department of a major internet and cable service provider. We were authorized to give up to $90 credit per customer on their bill but only as a last resort. Always remember to be nice to all customer service workers. You never know just how much they can help with a friendly attitude."
Axel_Dunce
"Former call center employee here. Highly accurate. Use your manners, and well fix your issue. Anything else, just makes us want to take longer, and you won't get a credit. Just because we are authorized, doesn't mean you'll get the credit for being an a**hat. haha. I've been verbally abused a few times for asking them not to swear at me. Lol."
Ok-Ad-7247
LELU
"I worked for a major telco company for many years in something called a ‘LELU’ which stands for Law Enforcement Liaison Unit. This 'unit' is pretty self-explanatory, but it essentially is a team who worked directly with the police/FEDS to monitor people's information for things such as obtaining communications history of call logs, SMS loss, etc."
"However, most importantly, the software we used, we as agents could directly see all your SMS texts, including MMS and their explicit imagery of whatever you were sending. This would include sexting, naked images, family photos, and everything. There were instances where people abused this position by stalking or 'monitoring' their SO’s comings and going’s."
MidniteMischief
Cookies!!
"I worked at a cafe chain called 'The Cookie Man,' 95% of their cookies arrived in cardboard boxes layered with bubble wrap. The last 5% arrived as pre-made dough that we would bake on-site to make the place smell like fresh cookies."
"I also worked at a cupcake shop. It's literally just packet mix that you add eggs and oil to before baking/piping pre-made icing onto. Don't waste your money on these places, 90% of these chain shops are the same and most are severely underpaying their workers (this is for Australia btw). Just purchase some packet mix from the supermarket and call it a day."
Frequent-Selection91
Look in the Back
"I was a Store Manager for a very large grocery chain and I can tell you that 95% of the time when customers complain to the manager, we may be professional and show empathy, and even resolve the problem."
"But then we usually just make fun of or talk crap about the person who complained to the other employees. And when a customer is really rude when we go 'look in the back' for something, we legit just stand around and talk to other employees, and make zero effort to look for the item."
A_Womans_Thoughts
From the Box
Kaitlin Olson Brunch GIF by The MickGiphy"I once worked at 'the area's premiere day spa'; the mimosas were made with Sunny D and not real orange juice, and the wines came out of a box."
SailorVenus23
Sunny D and champagne?!?!
What in the name of Lucifer?
Who does that?!
Do you have anything to add? Let us know in the comments below.