People Share The Most Ridiculous Things A Man's Done To Protect His Fragile Masculinity

There is a misconception that men must be strong and display a lack of emotion to qualify them as men, when in fact this does the opposite and makes them look desperate to protect their masculinity. These people share the most ridiculous thing a man has done to make himself seem more masculine.

u/dead10ck asks:

What is the most ridiculous thing you've ever seen a man do to defend their masculinity?

When he doesn't do pretty

My dad will not tolerate being served food that was set to look "pretty".

The sensitivity is real

A few weeks ago my wife and I visited a friend in another country. We got to know her boyfriend, who was a bit... special. He teased her relentlessly, all the time, and could not take any criticism at all.

Once, we were arriving back at the house (by car, he was driving), when she jokingly told him "I drive way better than you!", referring to the narrow alleyways in their town and how she has no issues parking in tiny spots.

Apparently, he saw that as an offense to his manlihood which he just could not let slide in front of his girlfriend and us, two almost complete strangers in the back seat. He started accelerating like a maniac, going about 80 kilometers an hour in an old European town in the mountains (where you don't see any cars coming and the roads are really narrow), his girlfriend screaming at him to stop. He did this for about two streets before he turned around and drove back.

When he's better than the essentials

Refuse to drink water. Ever.

No pink pens!

I used to work at a bakery where each clerk had to bring their own pens to have customers sign receipts with (if they paid with a card). I had a pink pen with a little duck on top and one day a customer refused to sign with it. He got really mad that I didn't have another pen and walked out to his car to find a pen that wasn't "girly".

Some men just can't do certain things

Stepbrother is the type of guy that refuses to hold his girlfriends purse. Once at a small family dinner she went to the bathroom, after a minute she must have texted him and he goes to check on her, they quietly argued a little and were clearly mad but trying to hide it the whole night after. Turns out she needed a tampon from her purse and he wouldn't even bring the purse too her, she had to text my sister to bring it to her.

Because men are strong...

It was raining and I offered a guy my umbrella and he refused, saying they were for just for women.

I didn't even know that was a thing.

When he was born with all the experience

A guy tried to immasculate me in my weightlifting class, the problem being he had never lifted in his life. It should be noted that this was guy was a one-upper. If anyone had a talent or had anything remotely interesting to say, he was there to out-do them.

I was showing him how to do bench press and I was doing 155, which is my max. Not a lot of weight, but again, it's a lot when you've never lifted. He proceeded to attempt the weight I was doing while I was at the water fountain. Unfortunately I couldn't get there before he gave himself a hairline fracture in his sternum.

That's so gay

Two male classmates and I were on a fieldtrip and got caught in the rain. I had a raincoat, and Guy1 had an umbrella. He offered to share it with the Guy2, who had no rain gear. Guy2 insisted it was gay to share an umbrella with another man. He would only use the umbrella if he carried it, while I walked under it with him and Guy1 borrowed my raincoat. This didn't fly because

A. I wasn't about to give up my raincoat for the paltry protection lent by huddling under an umbrella, and

B. Guy1 would not have fit my raincoat.

So Guy2 got soaked.

The tampon effect

Back in middle school (when uggs were still in fashion), I had a pair of ffuggs (fake fake uggs) that I kept things in that I didn't want people to see. My phone, tampons,money,etc.

Well one day aunt flo comes along and I attempt to sneakily put a tampon in my boot to go to the bathroom (I was still self-consious at the time about periods). I raise my hand, get up and try to walk to the door, trip and my boot falls off and my tampon rolls to this dude. He pics it up, not realizing what it is. When he realizes he screams like a girl and the people around start giggling as he throws it in the air.

Well he didn't like being laughed at so to redeem himself, he grabs the tampon and starts gnawing on it with his teeth, full on dog attack style. Then he spits it out knto the floor.

I was not happy and people just kinda looked around awkwardly and went back to work.

When he has to put an end to copy cats

I work with an insane over the top alpha ego f*** boy. We all go out for drinks one night and he literally tells me I should go fight a random stranger in the bar because we have a similar hair cut.

The man must lead!

I had a guy tell me "I' the man, I walk ahead" while we were in my part of the city where clearly I was the one who knew the way. It ended up with me turning the right way and then him jumping in front of me and walking ahead. It was kinda goofy but I could tell that at the core he was serious.

Teaching the children about men

Some years back I had a guy block me on FB and stop talking to me at work because I posted a pic of me in make-up that my daughter did and then a second pic of me in a sarong with same make up.

She was 10 and wanted a model to work on. It was hilarious fun and it will be a long lived great memory of me and my little girl having a good laugh.

Apparently he was talking behind my back about me being gay and I was teaching my daughter the wrong things about what 'being a man' meant and what girls should expect. The other blokes are as crazy as me and didn't think much of him.

When straight pride is more important than money

At a school dance it was cheaper to get in if you were a couple, I can't remember exactly how much it was probly 10 or 20 bucks cheaper. The teacher at the door was cool so even if you came with your group of guy friends he would just pair you off and charge you the cheaper price. These two jock type guys refused to be paired together and demanded they each pay their separate entrance fee.

When your masculinity effects your diet

My brother won't eat foods that resemble semen. No mayonnaise, no yogurt or sour cream, nothing. He won't even eat the melted frosting on a cinnabon. Masculinity so fragile

The MALE nurse

I once had a housemate who was a "male nurse". Not a nurse. A "male nurse". If you forgot the "male", you were always corrected.

It's a small price for a man

My husband has long hair and usually has a few hair ties on his wrist because of it, one of the guys I used to work with also has long hair and couldn't find a suitable replacement for the rubber band he'd lost. My husband upon noticing offered him his last hair tie that just so happened to be pink, and this dude went a damn tirade saying how he wasn't gay and wasn't going to wear it. Then went through the rest of the day in 102° heat, soaked with sweat and his hair just getting all stuck to his face and s***. This same dude also refused to ever put on sunscreen or wear gloves even though we worked outside with tools pretty much every damn day, so he'd constantly be sunburned and peeling and always had these huge painful looking blisters on his hands

The man always pays

Went on a date with a cop. He paid for dinner and we went for coffee. I quickly paid for the drinks and his attitude turned sour after that. He thought that by me paying, it made him less of a man. It was just a nice gesture. He's still single.

When the man has a game plan

Once in a nightclub, a ridiculously muscular guy was trying to drunkenly dance with every girl around and rub against them but seeing this didn't work, he tried to draw their attention by starting to do push ups in the middle of the dance floor even if there was broken glass everywhere.

Not the door!

I've had men basically refuse to walk through doors that I've opened for them.

Kylee Alons/Unsplash

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