
Sometimes life just sticks you in a weird situation with an odd group of people. You usually don't have any choice in these scenarios, but you re forced to acknowledge them and go along with them anyway, and hope that you survive the awkward moments, minutes, or hours you are about to endure. Hooooooo boy...
u/hangry_potato asked:
What's the most awkward situation you've ever been in with a stranger?
Here were some of the answers.
This Coupon: Good For 37 'Yikes'
I worked the entrance gate for a theme park. Our season pass holders used a biometric scan of their right index finger to verify their identity. One day a little girl walks up with her family, who only spoke Spanish, scans her pass and places her left finger on the scanner. I say, "Can you use your right finger sweetie?" Then, her mother raises the girls right arm to show me she doesn't actually have a right hand. Seemed to be due to a birth defect rather than a horrific accident.
However, her left finger keeps getting rejected, so I call a lead over to override the old scan and re-do it. He then proceeds to say the same thing to the girl, followed by her mother raising the arm again. It was definitely more awkward for me than the family, but it gets worse. About three months later it happened again, the same little girl. Absolutely mortifying.
Why Do This To Someone
Was adopted at birth. Learned who my birth family was in early 30s. Had met a sister but nobody else yet. Sister tells me grandpa is being taken off life support (cancer) and wants to talk to me before he dies. Travel to hospital several hours away. Meet mom in hospital lobby for the first time ever. Go to grandpa's room where all of his, and my, family are. They are all there to say their goodbyes. Probably only 5% of them knew of my existence. Suddenly all the attention is on me, the stranger. The have me kneel by his side and he apologizes through tears for pressuring my mom, that I just met, to give me away for adoption. People looked pretty shocked including me. The experience was a thousand emotions and awkward was in there somewhere.
Human Cushion
I am a pediatric nurse, but we "float" (substitute) to other floors when we have more nurses than we need. So I was sent to an adult floor to work as an assistant, since theirs had called in sick. An older male patient called out asking for help to get up to the bathroom. He stood, tried to pivot, and the newly operated on knee gave out. All 320 pounds of him came down on top of me and we laid there for almost an hour. I had closed the door for privacy, and neither he nor I could tell loud enough nor reach the call light for help. My phone was 10 feet from me on the floor after it fell out of my scrubs and rang incessantly. Finally the other assistant came to find me because she wanted to go on break and was tired of having to do all my work. The patient was fine, since he fell on me, I was sore for a week. We were nose to nose the whole time and boy was it awkward. His breath was terrible, but he was a nice man and felt so bad.
The Case Of The Mistaken Good Boy
Once I was at a dog groomers to pick up my dog. It's fairly small (20lbs) and white. Usually when I take him, he's got long semi curly hair and when I pick him up he has short straight hair, which is quite a change and this is what I expect when I go to pick him up.
I walk up to the counter and request my dog and the clerk tells me he'll be out in a moment. 30 seconds later an attendant walks out to the lobby from the back door with a dog that immediately gets excited and tries to run away as soon as it rounds the corner to me.
"Hey buddy!" I say as I walk up and attempt to pick up my dog, but it turns around and starts recoiling back and gives me a nip as I try picking him up. An old man behind me asks "Hey is that your dog?" And me thinking it's a pretty weird question respond "yep!" At that point he goes "I don't think so mister, that's my dog" and as I turn and realize this dog that looks just like mine after a grooming is 100% not my dog my face goes completely red and the whole lobby starts laughing. To make it worse, the old couple whose dog it was stuck around just because they wanted to see what my dog actually looked like and of course when he came out with a different haircut there was only a vague resemblance. Yikes.
Forceable Speed Dating
I serve in the Air Force and one time I got injured at work and had to go to the hospital, nothing serious, just dinged my finger super hard (f*cked up the ligament, my finger was shaped like an "N"). Anywho, when I get to the hospital I walk in the front door, I'm still in uniform, and some nice older man comes up to me and Thanks me for my service, I told him I appreciated his support and then he abruptly asked me if I was married.
I told him no and right at that moment he turns to this woman walking by heading for the door, he turns to her and says something along the lines of "You see this nice man? You should go on a date with him!" at first I thought maybe he knew the woman, maybe his daughter or something but the shocked look on her face I could easily tell he did NOT know her. She stopped for a moment and he asked her again and she just went wide-eyed, kind of stuttered for a moment and then B-lined it for the door. I really didn't know what to say so I just stood there looking like a guy who just got whacked in the head. The old man then turns back to me and says "Let's see who else is here an available." At this point I just made some excuse about being late for my appointment and walked away.
I don't know if I've ever been so red before or again in my life.
The Beginning Of An Epic Tale
Bit late to the party with this but...
While my dad was out of the country there was a major leak from the water tank in the loft which caused serious damage to the property and caused lots of other issues, including a hole in the ceiling.
I called out a repair guy only to hear a huge "boom", followed by a string of expletives before he called for help. I found him half in a cupboard, soaking wet, with his hand on a burst water pipe.
I ended up having to help. This involved me climbing up to the loft (in a short dress and stockings while he was basically laid on the floor underneath the ladder) and trying to turn off the water from there. This didn't work so we ended up switching places so he could professionally investigate.
Swapping places involved me getting soaking wet, and having to press up against the guy and contort myself into position in order to minimise the risk of further damage and water explosively spraying everywhere.
There was further pressing against each other and awkwardly closer contortions, as water was sprouting out like from a fountain unless we held it, before the leak was resolved.
The situation was like a bad porn parody.
Our dialogue even included things like: "if you come here you'll get wet" and "I don't mind getting wet, let's do it".
My friends now refer to this as my plumber porn story.
Freudian Slip On Steroids
I was with my mum buying flowers at a florist for a new year's eve party. The florist was obviously a very lonely woman and wouldn't stop going on about how she isn't doing anything for New Year's and how it's so nice we have friends to visit, to the point where it became really saddening. My mother obviously really felt for her. Every now and again, maybe twice a year, she has a brain fart and accidentally says what she is thinking. That day was one of those rare days. After paying for the flowers, my mum said 'thanks! Hope you find a friend soon!'. I look at her in shock, the woman looks at her in shock, and my mum just gasps, apologises and literally backs out of the store. God it was so awkward.
Best In Show
That time I screamed at a woman over poo.
My little village has a small annual dog show. We normally enter our little dog who has won "friendliest dog," "waggiest tail" and "dog the judge would like to take home" in the past. This year she was unfortunately in season so we didn't enter to prevent any 'fuss' from the other dogs but took her along to watch.
Half way across the park she decided to poo and I suddenly realised I'd forgotten a bag. There were loads of other people with dogs around due to the show so I wandered away a little to to ask someone for a bag. I turned back and to my horror a lady was picking up my little dog's mess. Not wanting to feel like one of those a-holes that doesn't clean up, I ran towards her to advise here she didn't have to do that because I was going to get it.
Instead, in a sort of panic, I waved my arms and barked "NO, THAT'S MY POO!" Please note that I did not say, "that is MY DOG'S poo."
She physically jumped then turned a deep red. She sort of mumbled an apology, dropped the poo and marched off with her dog.
It was at that point that I looked to my left and saw my dog's poo sitting a few feet away from the lady's dog mess that she was attempting to pick up.
I think about this at night sometimes.
Emphatic, Baseless Screaming
I went for a bike ride in my neighborhood at about 12 at night a month ago. It was pitch black other than streetlights every 5 or 6 houses.
I was kinda just zoning out, enjoying the fresh air, when something moved out of the corner of my eye. I turned my head to look, and I immediately assumed it was some kind of monster (I had just finished a horror movie), so I let out an extremely loud, bloodcurdling scream in the middle of the night in a silent suburban neighborhood. The thing, which turned out to be a blond soccer mom, screamed back at me, with pretty good reason.
I zipped past her on my bike, yelling "oh my god I'm so sorry!" over and over again until I got off the street..
I haven't gone on a nighttime bike ride since then.
And...I'm Moving To Siberia.
When I was a teenager my friends and I would spend the weekends staying up late playing video games and eating junk food. I was also a cross country runner, and on this particular night I was experiencing some extreme chafing from a long run earlier that day. While we were at the gas station getting Doritos and energy drinks I announced to who I thought was my friend, "Man, my nipples really hurt." Upon realizing it was a complete stranger with whom I had just shared this intimate detail I simply stared at him and said "You're not my friend" and walked away. I didn't go back to that gas station for a long time.
Those who grew up between the '80s and early 2000s have a long memory of items and experiences that either went out of style or disappeared completely.
From early PC games to Blockbuster to favorite snacks, there's a lot to miss from childhood.
But the odd thing is how quietly some of these things went away, and how few people seemed to notice.
Feeling nostalgic, Redditor lukiiiiii asked:
"What quietly went away without anyone noticing?"
Top-Notch Abbreviations
"ROFL (Rolling on the Floor Laughing) dropped off of the face of the planet, and now we just go straight from LOL (Laughing Out Loud) to LMAO (Laughing My A** Off)."
"I've been using it way more lately because of this. ROFL; can't let the classics die."
- habofi2125
Save Those Box Tops!
"Actual toys in cereal boxes and Cracker Jack boxes."
- GuttMilton
The Early Facebook Years
"Facebook 'Poke' wars."
- Hot_buttered_toast
How the Times Have Changed
"People calling them 'camera phones.'"
- NecroJoe
Advancing Technology
"When you turn off the TV, how the image would shrink to a dot before slowly fading away."
- ConcreteCubeFarm
TV Connection
"When you turn off the TV and then you run your finger on the screen and hear the crackle and feel the static on the glass."
- iwannaberockstar
Positive Environmental Change
"Acid Rain."
"It was a huge environmental issue in the late 70s through the early 90s. Rain was acidic and damaged fertile areas among other things."
"In the US, there was much research done, and eventually industrial regulations were put into place. Companies were allowed to decide what approach they chose to take as long as the results showed the appropriate amount of reduction in sulfur dioxide emissions."
"Unfortunately, positive news doesn't sell, so news outlets did not do justice to reporting this success. As we went into the 2000s, hardly anyone remembered what was done."
- GurglingWaffle
Can We Say, 'Nom Nom Nom'?
"McDonald's all-day breakfast menu."
- EmeraldAlicorn
Old Pastimes
"The pandemic killed a lot more than just people. I really miss McDonald's all-day breakfast."
"And being able to go to Walmart at 2 AM."
- LyrMeThatBifrost
The Days of Landlines and Cords
"I live in a rural area and have to pay for landline service to have internet. Since I have to pay for something so stupid, I figured I'd have to get something stupid."
"...So I got the hamburger phone from the movie 'Juno.'"
"Not gonna lie, the landline has come in clutch a few times, and holding a hamburger to your ear is amusing every time. 10/10 would recommend."
- Meat_Skeleton
Late-night Grocery Runs
"I think people have noticed now but at the time, nobody noticed it was happening: the closing of 24-hour stores. I live in a major city and we don’t have a single 24-hour grocery store ever since the pandemic."
- anxiousfamily
"In a World Where..."
"Movie trailers with that deep voice guy [Don LaFontaine] doing the voiceovers."
- jonathonkarate
SoBe Drinks
"SoBe. I think the last time I had one was at Quizno's."
"[cue 'X-Files' Music]"
- kooshipuff
Gizzard the Taco Bell Dog
"Taco Bell used to have a chihuahua as their mascot. Little dude just disappeared one day, and anyone born after 2000 probably doesn't even know what I am talking about."
- To_Fight_the_Night
Google+
"Google+ was the only social media our school forgot to block on our laptops, so I used it a lot. RIP."
- AgentBieber
Some of these really brought back some deeply-engrained memories for the '80s to '00s kids, and it's true that many of them blipped out of existence quietly.
But if this teaches us anything, it doesn't mean that "out of sight, out of mind" also has to mean "out of heart."
And let's have a moment of silence for the vocal stylings of Don LaFontaine and Gizzard the talking Taco Bell dog.
We all know that the human body is very complex.
But even with all the recorded and available science, there are certain things about our bodies that continue to elude us, and medical experts can still get stumped about how the human form reacts unpredictably.
Curious to discover some of the mystifying yet unsettling truths about our anatomy, Redditor Hot_Banana_Ice-cream asked:
"What is a creepy fact about the human body?"
Now, observe this.
Visceral Reaction
"If you wear glasses which vertically inverts your vision long enough, your brain will correct it, and you'll see things normal. But when your take those glasses off, everything will look upside-down again until brain recalibrates again."
– shadow29warrior
Brain Assessment
"Our brain filters out a lot of what we see along with just straight making sh*t up based on extrapolation."
– AdmiralClover
The Experiment
"My favorite is the blind spot at the center of each eye, where the optic nerve is."
"A lot of people don't even know it exists, and even if they do, it is bigger than people often think."
"And it's also really easy to demonstrate to people if you know how. It's one of my favorite bar tricks - all you need is a pen and a napkin to draw a cross and a dot."
https://thebrain.mcgill.ca/flash/capsules/experience_jaune06.html
Alternate demo: https://faculty.washington.edu/chudler/chvision.html
"Edit: If it doesn't work, you're doing something wrong - not getting close enough, the image is too small on your phone, you're not closing the correct eye or not keeping your gaze fixed on the cross."
"It isn't because you don't have a blind spot. Unless you're a squid, you have a blind spot. All vertebrates have them."
– M0dusPwnens
The workings of our innards are out of this world.
The intestines are covered by a double "fleece" of peritoneum. See it like a blanket.
When your intestines get damaged for whatever reason, this blanket starts moving out of itself and crawling upwards towards the place which has the injury. It will stay there until the injury is recovered. And then move on again.
Maybe not the most creepy fact, but definitely interesting in my opinion.
Do Do That Doo-Doo
"We don't just have one anal sphincter. When poo comes along it passes another inner sphincter which isn't under voluntary control."
"Sensory cells can detect whether you're about to pass gas or solid. From toddler age on, you can decide to go or not to go. If the time isn't right (e.g. at a friend's house or no toilet nearby), the inner sphincter can push the poo back and store it there for later."
"That's why sometimes if you need to do a number two but don't go, the urge goes away after about 20 minutes later. (But seriously, go if you can. Constipation risk.)"
"Gas can't be pushed back so easily, so we sometimes toot by accident when moving or engaging the core."
– bmb00zld
The Same Lining
"The inside of your cheek and your rectum are lined by the same type of tissue."
– GasTsnk87
You don't always have control of your body.
Taste Of Curiosity
"The front of your tongue is curious, constantly patrolling, and autonomous. It chases the dentist around your mouth and you aren’t even aware of it. So embarrassing and weird/creepy."
– AdeleBerncastel
Licking Partner
"In dental school, I learned this fact when practicing taking impressions on each other. My buddy’s tongue kept licking my finger. I asked him to quit licking me, and he was like 'I can’t help it!' And then we switched places and my tongue wouldn’t leave him alone.And for those of you that don’t think your tongue does this: some of you are right. But the majority of you just think your tongue is behaving, but it is all over the place without you even knowing."
– recoveringcultmember
Dancing With The Dead
"Bodies will move as they’re coming out of rigor. I’ve been bumped by a few (I’m a coroner). Bodies can also make sounds as the remaining air/ gas leaves… 2am in the morgue and I thought I was in COD zombies."
– Jar-JarShotFirst69
Wonder of wonders.
The Only Way Out
"When you get laser tattoo removal the ink doesn’t disappear, you pee it out."
"Your body’s immune system breaks down the pigments of ink and it flows in your blood stream, gets processed through your kidneys, then you pee out the ink."
– Fine_wonderland
Our soul-containing vessel is a mysterious wonder unique to us.
We should do whatever it takes to take great care of it because it's the only one we've got.
If we don't, they might turn on us.
People Explain Which Companies They Wish Would Go Out Of Business To Help Improve Society
When the global pandemic hit in march of 2020, countless companies saw themselves going under.
Sadly, some companies, from a wide variety of businesses, simply couldn't adapt to working under the parameters of social distancing, or couldn't adapt in time, resulting in them permanently closing their doors.
Many people were sad to see these companies close, while many others were even sadder that some companies managed to pull through and stay open.
Indeed, long before Covid-19 wreaked havoc on the world, some companies and corporations people felt were actually detrimental to society would be doing the world a favor by going out of business.
Redditor param_T_extends_THOT was curious to find out which companies people fell into this less than prolific category, leading them to ask:
"Which company could go out of business tomorrow and it would be to the betterment of this world?"
Nothing Express About It
"Express Scripts."- BadDadJokes
Wildly Different, Yet Equally Unnecessary
"Privatized prisons."
"Glitter manufacturers."- Sped-Connection
Where To Even Begin?
"The church of Scientology?"- dipshipsaidso
Beware The Pyramids
"Any MLM bullsh*t."- Work-Alone
Taylor Swift Would Probably Agree
"Ticketmaster."- Tynesand
You Really Want To Trust Them With Your Money?
"HSBC, one of the largest banks in the world, is a criminal enterprise:"
"In 2012, the bank paid $1.9 billion to settle charges brought by U.S. authorities that it had failed to prevent money laundering by Mexican drug cartels."
"In 2013, HSBC was fined $1.92 billion by US and UK regulators for its role in the manipulation of the London Interbank Offered Rate (LIBOR), a benchmark interest rate."
"In 2014, the bank was charged by the U.S. Department of Justice for violating sanctions against Iran, Sudan, and other countries."
"In 2018, the bank was charged by the US Department of Justice for violating the Bank Secrecy Act and anti-money laundering regulations."
"Also, Nestle."- alecsputnik
Amen!
"Joel Osteen's ministries."- ststeveg
Maybe All Big Pharma?
'Seems like the general consensus is Nestle, but I’ll be weird and say DuPont."
"They’re the reason every living human on the planet has Forever Chemicals running through their bloodstream."-poppidypoppop
"Blinded By The Light"...
"Everyone one that makes blindingly bright low beam bulbs."- RetinaMelter9000s
One Bad Experience Can Ruin It Forever
"Mark's plumbing."- GreenieMachinie93
"Oh The Wells Fargo Wagon Is A Comin' Down The Street..."
"Wells Fargo."- Itchy_Focus_4500
Honestly, Can't Agree With This One
"F*cking TurboTax."- camilofl20
Absolutely Frightening
"Wagner Group.'
"Dirty mercenary army with soldiers for hire."
"They have caused chaos where ever they have gone."
"Syria, Central African Republic, Madagascar, Libya, Venezuela, mali, Mozambique and a few other places, they have no desire to see a peaceful world as that would financially cripple them as a organization."
"Look at what they are doing to the Ukrainian people."
"Despicable organization and they have zero moral compass."- Weary_Violinist_3610
Maybe all Credit Reporting?
"Experian, Equifax, and/or Transunion."
"Leeches on America."- compusmack
Can't Help But Say It, Did She Really Think "goop" Was An Appealing Name?
"Comcast & goop."- celeresaharano·
Be it poor customer service, questionable business practices, or just plain fraud, it's hard not to agree that any or all of these companies would not be missed should they close their doors.
After all, when a health and wellness brand openly tells you that some or all of its products may not actually improve your health or wellness, that just about says it all.
...even if Shakespeare in Love remains a romantic gem...
Even if society as a whole seems to become more tolerant with each passing year, bullying still remains an ever-growing problem.
Particularly at schools.
Some might say bullying has only gotten worse, as social media often means children are no longer safe when they're out of school hallways and in the comfort of their own homes.
What is perhaps most disturbing and perplexing about bullying is there is never a justifiable reason for people to behave so appallingly.
Often, children bully other children to make them seem cool or powerful in the eyes of others.
Most of the time, they will also pinpoint a certain thing about their helpless victims as a feeble excuse to justify their bullying.
"What were you bullied for?"
Trying Too Hard
"I was socially awkward."
"I also was greatly motivated to be liked."
"I did a lot of sh*t trying to be liked that in hindsight, made me unliked."- EVEseven
Health Conditions Beyond Their Control
"Eczema which often affected my face."- Puffs01
Name Calling? Seriously?
"I was called a biscuit head, because my head was shaped like a biscuit."- cerakaz
It's Not Like They Chose It.
"My name."- maximus12121
Only Cowards Don't Pick On People Their Own Size
"Being the small kid."- occamhanlon
Picking On People For Keeping To Themselves? Just Cruel.
"For being the quiet kid."- actuallyjohnqmind
No Reason Whatsoever
"To this day, I really don't know."
"Something happened in the summer between 2nd and 3rd grade that made a bunch of people decide that they didn't like me anymore, including my best friend.'
"I only had two friends left until my family moved away in the middle of 7th grade."
"Bullies would follow me home most days and my mom finally had to verbally super-saiyan a few parents down the street to get them to take it down a notch."
"I finally asked one of them what I ever did to them, and they said 'you were born'."
"How do you even respond to that statement."
"I just got a sharp pang after seeing that phrase again."- msprang
Ignoring It Is Enabling It
"I was bullied from age 6 to age 13 every day for my surname (a word for a hunchback in my language) , my looks, my nature, me knowing English, reading, drawing and just existing overall."
"I f*cking hated middle school."
"My mom tried standing up for me, but no one cares in Slavic countries and the teachers didn't give a sh*t even though they saw everything, it's all part of growing up."
"My father ignored my constant tears and the terror I experienced in those years."
"I was attacked, beaten, and targeted whenever i would leave my flat."
"I was stabbed with screwdrivers and dull knives, chased around the neighborhood by kids on bikes while they threw rocks at me."
"I was only invited to birthday parties so that the kids would have someone to terrorize and gang up on."
"I always hated birthdays, but my mom though maybe the children would be kinder to me out of school."
"But that's that."
"Once I began high school I was around all new people, and I decided to play as a tough girl and stood up for myself on the get-go."
"But it turns out art school mostly brought other bullied kids together and I had the 4 best years of my life there with other kind and loving people who just wanted to make friends and have fun."- Cropalitet
Knowing They Wouldn't Fight Back
"Being easy to walk over."
"I had a really hard time asserting myself."
"So being 'too nice'."
"But really, just very insecure."- idolovehummus
Classism
"Being poor."
"And my mom smoked continuously so being poor and smelly."
"Kids are brutal."
"For those that can relate I'm wishing you all the best for where you are now."
"We are a product of where we came from but that doesn't define who we are today."
"For those that can't relate, I'm so glad you had a different childhood and also hope you are doing well."
"And for those that find this is their moment to continue to bully, I hope kindness finds you and helps you with whatever you need to have a brighter day."- Evil-ish
Red Hair Is Beautiful, And Don't Ever Forget It
"Glasses, red hair, and freckles."
"Opie, Howdy Doody, and red-headed step child jokes all the way through school."- espifer
"Having red hair."- DeplorableKurt
In Other Words, Just For Being Yourself
"As a black kid, in a predominantly black area:
"Wearing glasses and having braces."
"Being fat."
"Being nice."
"Being smart."
"Liking Anime."
"Wanting to be a Pilot (influenced by the Anime I liked the most)."
"But guess what?"
"I'm a f*cking Pilot now."- ApacheOc3lot
Perhaps the saddest, or most infuriating, cases of bullying are when people bully others for sharing likes or interests they have themselves.
Case in point, and true story: being bullied constantly through 2nd and 3rd grade for liking Mighty Morphin Power Rangers."
Only to see several of the people who bullied you express their excitement at the release of the 2017 film version of Power Rangers on Facebook.
Some children are just, plain cruel...