We all have our moments. Some are just little slip-ups that can just be chalked up to word vomit. Other times, it can completely change the course of your life. No matter what, it's always good to think before you act.
bigred6601 asked: What is one moment when you realized you just f---ed up?
At least he wasn't completely lost.
"I invited a friend over for a BBQ. He didn't know anyone and has never been to my house but seemed really eager to go.
So I was a little irritated that he was almost 2 hours late. I was just about to text him when I happened to look over my neighbors fence.
The neighbor was also having a BBQ. It was like it happened in slow motion. I saw my friend in the neighbors yard chatting up some old lady. Our eyes locked. I saw the realization literally hit his face.
I still laugh about it. I swear the guy turned white!"
That sounds like a sh*tty situation.
"Direction driller and locator of 10 years here. Drilling in Miami quite a few years ago and was doing a fairly deep road crossing. Half a rod under the road I felt a pop and proceeded to see a 30' tall shit stream shoot out of the road. I had just drilled into a 12" unmarked force main sewer.
If you have ever seen a 30' stream of raw sewage you will never forget the smell."
FuryWhatWhenOof.
"It's been almost 30 years since this happened and I still have nightmares. Freshman year of college. My first set of college finals. I was totally prepared and ready to take them all. Had almost straight As going into finals.
I go to my last one, which was a throwaway 3 credits of introduction to sociology. I sit down ready to ace it and look up at the board to see "Biology 103". Huh, that's weird. I pull out my calendar. The sociology final was yesterday."
When Truth or Dare gets deadly.
Giphy"When I climbed my schools roof. Was quite a heavy kid, and I was out and about with my cousin and mates. After running around school my friends dare me to go up on the roof and, as I'm not a wuss, I gotta prove to them that I ain't afraid to go on no roof!
So after a while and much help I got up. Ran around up there and had a bit of fun and then I had to get down.... that's when I knew I f---ed up
Nothing in sight to help me, all I could do was either call someone to help me ( e,g parents or firemen) or jump. Decided to take the risk and jump, tried to do parkour like I saw in videos, jump and roll you know. Ended with f---ing up my foot, calling my parents and driving to the hospital, when questioned said I slipped while playing basketball.
Foot is still f---ed up til this day and my mom think it was because of basketball, lol."
This is why they ended the "thirty minutes or free" deal.
"Not that exciting but it was my first day at me new pizza job and 20 minutes after I cashed out a pickup order I FROZE and realized: I never sliced that pizza."
Oh no!
Giphy"I was a young software engineer working for a startup in 1998. Wrote about a weeks worth of code, images, and HTML. There was this funny file named ?~ in the directory. I wasn't sure how it got there, but I wanted it gone before I checked everything into CVS. No problem. rm-rf ?*.
I discovered my error a few seconds later when the directory listing contained nothing. No code, images, or HTML.
Turns out ? is a shell wildcard character matching any 1 character. Combined with * all files got deleted.
It was at this moment I knew I f---ed up.
Luckily I was using Linux. E2fs file systems had a utility called debugfs which allowed me to list deleted inodes and dump them to new files. Took the better part of a day to figure it all out since this was before google. I recovered the entire project."
What a horrible Halloween.
"Halloween 2011.
3 men knock on the door all wearing masks. I laugh it off thinking it's some friends being stupid. Unlock the door. Handle flies down, door gets kicked open (realise I messed up) and within seconds I've got my hands and feet bound whilst they begin to trash and rob the place.
I escaped when my feet got loose, slipped my hands over my skinny butt (thank you high metabolism), ran to a window, opened it, climbed out and jumped from the first floor window. Broke a ton of bones in both feet and sprinted to a neighbors house.
I now have f---ed knees and feet and PTSD at Halloween time. Get anxiety when someone knocks on the door regardless of the time of year. Got addicted to pain killers for about 7 years and struggle with alcoholism. Also really f---ing sad that my favourite holiday was ruined."
This one had a happy ending.
Giphy"New year's Eve 1999 I called a woman I was very good friends with (friends only, I was firmly in the friend zone at that time), she was also my boss. I had way too much to drink and was not in any way considered sober or even slightly so, I was pissed as a fart. I proceeded to tell this woman how I felt about her, what I wished to do with her and how I wanted to do it. I told her this for about 45 minutes. Afterwards I continued to drink.
Several days later back at work she calls me into the office and asked me why I'd called her at New year, I pulled a blank, I honestly could not remember a thing. She also informed me that several minutes into the conversation/monologue she handed the phone over to her mother. I still pulled a blank, in fact I was so convinced that nothing happened I was sure she was winding me up. If anything like that had happened after all why was she still even talking to me let alone letting me continue to work with her. She insisted that I called and I refused to believe her.
It was not until late January when I received my detailed mobile phone bill that showed a 48 minute phone call to her number late on December 31 that I finally had to believe her. The difficult part was facing her mother after my boss and I became an item.
We are now very happily married but even now my MIL still takes the piss out of me over that phone call. My wife however is very happy."
Horrible timing.
"At one point a few years ago, my girlfriend (at the time) texts me and says "huh, I guess surprise pregnancies are a thing."
Then she stopped responding for about half an hour, and I proceeded to have a heart attack.
Turns out her sister got knocked up, but that was the absolute worst 30 minutes of my life."
This got meta.
"I got called into a meeting with my line manager, out of nowhere. He slid a piece of paper across the desk and said "Do you know what Reddit is, and are these comments from your account?"
Took me a moment to figure out the answers to those questions, and soon enough realised... oh boy am I going to have a story for TIFU when this is over.
Sadly, thanks to an NDA, I am not allowed to tell any more of the story."
Redditor bluewings23 wanted to hear about all the eccentric things we do at parties to keep the attention focused on us, so they asked:
"What’s your party trick?"
Gone
Homer Simpson Burn GIF by Dallas FuelGiphy"Disappearing."
saello
"You say hello to the host, go to a corner and play with your phone for a while, then walk out the door when no one is watching and text the the host 'sorry, I have an emergency. Thank you for the invite.' Works like a charm all the time."
Mariuxpunk007
Cherries
"If there are cherries at the function, I typically tell ppl I can tie a cherry stem into a knot, in my mouth, in under 10 seconds. I have won betting money doing this a number of times. And it's as simple as tying a knot in a cherry stem and putting I try in my cheek before ever mentioning that I can do it."
"Then I just swap 'em out and pull the one with the knot out. No one has ever noticed me take the second untied stem out of my mouth."
Owen_Bundles
Cubed
"I solve a Rubik's cube that I find around the house without anyone noticing, and then I never admit to solving it. Sometimes nobody notices. I'm like a crazy party animal obviously."
fishintheboat
"My buddy used to leave an unsolved cube at parties we would go to. He would wait until he saw people messing with it, or around it and would be like 'Oh cool, can I see?' and solve it in like 10 seconds. Obviously he crushed massive amounts of sex."
shartnado3
“Read my friend's mind”
"Me and my friend have a trick we call 'black magic.' I leave the room, and the other partygoers tell my friend an object in the room. I then come back, and state that I can 'read my friends mind' and guess the object they told her. My friend starts listing items in the room, and I answer no until the actual object comes along."
"It usually takes people hours to figure out the trick. They think it’s always the third object, or that it has to do with intonation or a sign of sorts. So we repeat the trick excluding that tell. Makes them go nuts."
"The trick is in the name. The right object is the one mentioned after a black object."
PomegranateRules
One Shot
Giphy"In college, my party trick was to fill a red Solo cup with vodka and take it as a single shot. Probably killed a bunch of brain cells doing that."
Robertsonforget
Oof. College party tricks. Yikes. I remember nothing.
Duck and Roll
Rolling In The Deep GIF by AdeleGiphy"I am double joined on most of my body, I just say 'autobots roll out' and twist my body in terrifying ways into a small cube."
crappy-mods
Pistols at 14
"I got shot in the wrist by a jammed CO2 powered BB pistol at my 14th birthday party. We thought that we had gotten it out or it fell out but it had not and healed over quite quick. Twenty years later I have the power to hang magnets from my wrist that look like magic and set off very sensitive metal detectors!"
Butt-Spelunker
The Unusuals
"Opening beer bottles and wine bottles without their typical openers. ie using an empty can or lighter to open a beer bottle or banging a bottle of wine off a wall to get the cork out. Or getting out the cork of a wine bottle that’s been pushed completely inside the bottle."
"Useful party tricks are always the best and often needed!"
Alternative-Public32
Magic
Justin Willman Netflix GIF by CameoGiphy"Card tricks. It’s been years and someone still wants to know how I made their card appear."
Strong-ishninja
Play Turkey
"I often go to bonfires or scaled down versions where a fire is present. I can hold my hands in the fire for a much longer time than most people due to my job working with molten glass. It’s a fun way to shock people when you reach into the flames and grab a half burnt piece of wood or something like that. I have yet to play chicken with someone but I think it’s a credit to the people I hang out with that they aren’t dumb enough to try"
coderedmountaindewd
I gotta try a few of these.
Who am I kidding?
I'm too old.
Do you have any tricks that leave guests astounded? Let us know in the comments!
Redditor Ntoxide wanted to hear from people who have come across the dead, so they asked:
"People of Reddit who have found dead bodies what was your immediate reaction?"
Reactions
Toy Story Goodbye GIFGiphy"As a nurse aide in a nursing home that happened more than I'd like to remember, and tearing up was always my immediate reaction."
TroublesMuse
School Zones
"So when I was about 15 I went to school to take my final exam. I was late due to my bus being in traffic and had to walk through a few streets after getting to my stop, at around midway there this guy crossing the street gets hit by a car going 50 in a school zone (the primary school was to the side of my school). He went over the car and feel on the ground with a crack, car drives away."
"At that point I went to check it out and was already panicking he was still breathing for a while after the crash for about 5 minutes and then he just died. I called 112 and tried to explain the situation as I was hyperventilating. Apparently he had broken his spine and had a lot of internal bleeding, I did not do the exam."
Mobile-Paint-7535
Last Breaths
"Was beside my mum's bed when she died. I just somehow knew it was close so I stayed there and waited. After her last breath, I just sat by her for a bit thinking she was now in peace and past the pain and struggle of a body that was progressively shutting down from old age. Called out for the nurse to come in and confirm she was gone."
"My dad, I found on the floor at our old family home a couple of days too late, almost five years later. Called my wife and then the authorities and sat on the front step feeling guilty, a bit lost and finally annoyed. I was angry and frustrated that he always point blank refused to have one of those medical alert pendants and I hadn't been there over the weekend. I'm still dealing with the remnants of that 15 months later."
djjrrr
Being 9...
"Found my mom's body, I was 9, I thought she was sleeping, I understood when my sisters started crying."
kalarm2
"That's wild. My mom died when I was 9 too, Christmas night from breast cancer. My dad just kinda walked in my room and went 'Hey, let's go downstairs.' I was still at the age where I knew she was dead but I didn't fully understand what was happening until the guys with the hearse showed up to take her body. That's a weird age to accept death at."
darkpinkEFcancer
911
"I didn't realize he was dead and tried to wake the guy up gently. Honestly, I thought he was passed out drunk or high. I was about to check his pulse when two city workers came along told me not to touch him and called 911. The ambulance came, and I went to work. Never actually thought about it again until I saw this post."
tryoracle
Finding the dead is aways a shock to the body.
Farewell
animation goodbye GIFGiphy"My first dead body was a sweet old woman. I got a phone call from her husband at 3am. Apparently she went to the living room to watch TV. I went there. Cold and unresponsive. Hugged the guy and held his hand. Called 911. Called the family. Helped out with whatever I could."
"Second one was very sweet as well. I helped someone transition peacefully and comfortably. There was an order to administer morphine every hour. Around 6am his wife told me he passed. Since he was on hospice I got to interact with them. The family was awesome."
TheRealDannySugar
Crashed
"I was watching a movie with my girlfriend, and suddenly heard a loud crash. I used to be trained in first aid and CPR, so I jumped up and walked outside to try to see if there was anything I could do."
"I wasn't the first on the scene, but I was the first to check out if the driver was ok. I noticed that the glass on the windshield was cracked at about head height, and no seat belt was worn, nor were the airbags deployed."
"Nothing felt right, and there was a feeling of dread that I can only describe as 'empty with a side of heavy.'"
"The man was slouched over to his right, appeared to be about late 50s early 60s, and the primary thing I noticed that confused me was that his veins in his arms looked as though he was still flexing. There was nothing I could do, as there was no pulse, no breathing, and a clear traumatic brain injury that even had he been alive, it wouldn't have looked great long term."
thundervagious
'I love you'
"Called 911. I was hysterical. I loved her very much, and I couldn't believe she was dead. It was like a nightmare I couldn't wake up from. I tried my best to stay calm until the cops and paramedics showed up. It was one of the worst days of my life that I still replay in my mind over and over and over again."
"I flash to the disagreements we had and how many times I could have said 'I love you' more and what I could have done in the last 30 years to have changed everything. That's why saying I Love You is so important, and if something happens, call 911."
"I'm much better now, but that was one of my first reactions."
HumanMycologist5795
High Seas
"Sailor, on one of my first patrol’s we found a dead body in the ocean. We called a man overboard and the nerves of trying to figure out who it might have been was so gut-wrenching and surreal. Turned out it was a Japanese man who had been dead for about a week just floating in the Pacific. Never learned more about it, but still think about it time to time."
lo-squalo
The Body
Comforting Big Hero 6 GIF by SkyGiphy"I told the med tech, and then, because she wasn't on home health or hospice, I washed her body and teeth, brushed her hair, changed her brief, and dressed her in some nice clothes."
Bao-Babe
Saying goodbye to a person and seeing death is never easy.
Do you have any similar experiences? Let us know in the comments below.