Ever find yourself people watching, and catch someone doing something stupid?
Look around a store, and you might catch a fellow shopper make a silly mistake, like dropping a product or tripping on their feet. But Redditor u/Dead---inside asked people, "What's the dumbest thing you've seen someone do at a store?" And people answered with stories that go beyond simple human error. From bumbling thieves to bloody accidents, here are the best of the stories they shared.
10. They sent this thief packing
"My friend had someone purchase a suitcase. When she opened it as a matter of standard practice at check out, the rookie shoplifter had filled it with clothes. They just stammered that they didn't know any of that was in there. So she pulled it all out and put it to the side, at which point the cutomer decided they didn't want to buy the suitcase after all."
9. That mom should be more worried
Giphy"I watched a toddler drink nail polish. His mom didn't do anything besides take the bottle and do the weird violent angry whisper thing."
8. Those doors are tricky
"A guy stopped mid-cycle in the revolving door to pick up something he dropped on the floor and got whacked hard in the rear when another customer entered."
7. He looked like a fool
"Worked at a pet store and watched a guy try and shove a huge aquarium filter in his hoodie. Then he had the balls to approach the counter with this protruding abnormally from his belly and tried to buy something.
I laughed and told him to return it or I'd call the cops, he looked shook up, waddled back to the aisle and put it on the shelf. Told him on the way out to never return."
6. This woman didn't want milk in her milkshake
Giphy"Okay so I was at work in an ice cream shop. A lady comes in and orders a vanilla milkshake. She gets this nasty look on her face when I add the milk, but shrugs it off when I ask her about it. So I'm ringing her out, and she pays, and then goes right to my owner and complains about the service. 'I'd like to let you know that the 'boy' who just served me (I'm 19) was very rude to me.' 'What'd he do ma'am.' 'He made my milkshake with milk in it and I'm lactose intolerant. I demand a refund and for him to be fired.' I'm just sitting here dumbfounded how anyone could be so stupid. Ice cream, by it's very nature, Has milk."
5. Where do watermelons come from?
"The woman who was arguing with me (i was working in the produce dept of a grocery store) about how she didn't like how one side of the watermelon was flatter, paler, and a little dirty. I said, 'That's just how they get when they are on the ground.'
'What do you mean, 'when they are on the ground'?'
she thought watermelons grew on trees."
4. The rudest shoppers
"As someone who worked in retail, people who get things, put it in their cart, walk around the store, then realize they don't want it and plop it where they currently are.
Extra hate if it is a cold/hot item."
3. There are better solutions, sir.
"Not a store but restaurant. I had a gentlemen specifically request pecans on the side of his salad. When I arrived with his request he was very upset that they weren't far away enough....he was allergic. Didn't want them in the first place."
2. I'm glad this employee refused this dumb request
"I worked at a home improvement retailer. One guy wanted to buy an attic ladder; there's a display, but the actual product is stored in the overhead. So I got a lift truck and got one down for him. Dude wants to look at it; again, there's a display, but whatever, I open the box up so he can look at it. He decides yeah, that's what he wants.
M-Fer demands that I get another one down for him. His reason? 'The box is open on this one'.
(I refused)"
1. Think before you pull a trigger
"Years ago my Mom rented a large staple gun to upholster some chairs but it kept jamming.
Off we go to the rental place, the guy says 'Jamming, let's just see' and............................................... places it over the palm of his hand and pulls the trigger twice.
Blood everywhere, two large staples in his palm. Good thinking Bob!"
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Redditor Suspicious_Boss3635 wanted to hear about the worst of times when visiting other people's homes, so they asked:
"What was your worst/weirdest experience at somebody else’s house?"
In my home, I try to be the best host I can be.
Learn from me.
A nice shade of crimson
Say So Red Light GIF by Doja CatGiphy"Stayed at my friend's house one time and found out her family only uses red light bulb in their house because an astrologer told them to do so."
SuvenPan
From the other room...
"Went to a friend's house. We came in and somebody started yelling and swearing at him from another room. For no reason and impromptu. Scary , threatening and abusive sounding. It was his dad and the dad didn't realize I was there. The kid was cool about it, just kind of, maybe we should just go for a walk. It was how cool the kid was that unnerved me. Just his day to day."
jonas00345
How about a sweater?
"In college, I went to this girl's house during a free period with six or seven friends. We arrive, and she opens the door, says hello to her father, and immediately strips down to her bra and panties in the living room. We spent 45 minutes hanging out with her and her dad, and the whole time she's walking around in basically nothing."
"I asked her dad about it at a different time, and he nonchalantly says she's always done this and acted like it was a completely normal thing to do. Also, bonus points for her goth friend who sat there playing with a knife the whole time."
COLONEL_ROOSTER
Sit with me...
"As a 12 yr old we shifted to a small town from our cattle property so we kids could go to high school, I didn’t know anyone at school till the weird kid befriended me, invited me home after school one day. There’s me thinking great I’m making friends. When we got there her mom was obviously slightly drunk, no father around that I could see, just sitting in her room talking crap, when her mum calls us into her bedroom."
"So we went in and her mum is lying on a single bed and there’s a double in there that we both sort of lounged on, then her mum starts crying. The girl tells me her dad died about six months ago. I'm going 'so sorry to hear that,' her mum starts telling me how he was a bad alcoholic and they’d gone to bed one night, he was ‘spooning’ her when he died in his sleep with his arms wrapped around the mum, cause she was drunk too she didn’t wake up till quite late and his body had started rigor mortis."
"She realizes and starts screaming, daughter runs in, dad is dead and mum is stuck in his arms. They had to call police to help apparently, she couldn’t get out. Best bit though was I was sitting on the bed where he’d died 6 mths previous but they’d never changed the sheets or covers, they smelt musty, no wonder the girl acted weird, they both really needed therapy but this was nearly 50 yrs ago."
chookiekaki
HER!!
Jimmy Fallon Singing GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy FallonGiphy"At someone’s birthday party at her house. She divided us into groups and made us write songs about her."
Main-Not-For-Porn
Ok. I may actually try this at my next party.
"They"
Video Games Lol GIF by Robbie CobbGiphy"When I was a kid I went over to a friend's house. At some point they went to have dinner. 'They' meaning the whole family. I wasn't at any point asked to join them. So while they ate I sat in the living room and played on their Atari."
frank-sarno
We stopped to help
"A buddy and I were walking down the street and noticed a drunk guy bothering a woman outside a store and his b*lls were hanging out of his shorts. We stopped to help. And so does some guy in an army jacket. and after the cops come by to deal with the drunk guy, Army guy invites us over to have a beer. We were about 14 or so at the time. We said sure!"
"Get to his apartment and he gives us a beer each. And shows us his big knife. Tells us how to gouge out eyes. And how to shoot someone under the chin at the throat pointing up so if by chance they survive, they will be paralyzed. Then proceeds to demomstrate on me a choke move he was taught."
"Which freakin' hurt. My friend had the knife in hand just in case army guy didn't let go. After I was let go and able to breath we peaced out of there FAST. The longer we sat there. The more scared I was getting. Haven't thought about that for some time."
KraftDinr
Eat carrots instead...
"I remember when I was a kid, probably around 10 or so we went to friends of our family's for dinner. The husband and wife got into a very loud screaming match over whether to serve creamed corn or frozen corn. I'm talking in each other's faces and being shrilly loud."
"Ten year old me was fascinated by how such a mundane object could arise such passions, and of course I wanted see how it turned out but we were instead quickly ordered into the car and left. Still never understand how corn caused such a disagreement. I found out later they got divorced."
llcucf80
Pour it back...
"When I was 8 I slept over a friends house. For dinner they had pancakes. Everyone ate together. After I put the syrup on my pancakes I was scolded by the dad for using too much syrup. I then noticed everyone at the table only put a tablespoon on their pancakes. After I ate the pancakes, they took my plate and tried to pour the unused syrup back into the container."
jaiframsey
Sometimes it's just better to stay home.
Do you have any crazy experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.
Curious to hear examples from those who've witnessed extremely unusual behavior at these facilities had plenty to share when Redditor N3SSDOGGDOGG asked:
"People who have spent time in a Psych Ward what is the craziest thing you’ve witnessed?"
One thing is certain. There is never a dull moment.
Consequences Of Enabling Drug Addiction
"In our tiny community some kids are smelly because typically the parents are addicts who either didn't pay their water bill, don't own a washer/dryer or are too brain dead to care. The nearest laundromat is now 30 miles away because the local one got broken into and robbed too many times by. Our school is awesome, there are staff members who do laundry for these kids and make sure they get showers. It's discreet so they're not ridiculed. I hate how our society enables addiction and even celebrates drug use, but I don't know how we can fix it at this point. It's gotten completely out of hand."
– Marisleysis33
Taking You To A Live Commercial
"My brother-in-law had a stint in a psych ward a little over a year ago, and on a particularly manic day they were in the middle of the community room and started singing."
“I have a structured settlement and I need cash now”
"This was then met by about 40-50 psych patients shouting back."
“CALL J.G. WENTWORTH!!! 877-CASH-NOW!!!”
"After getting a few verses in the orderlies stepped in and kindly requested they stop, which was kinda a shame since it sounded like they were all having a good time."
– MikeMars1225
Select Highlights
"I've worked in one for about 2 years now. The staff are just as crazy."
"Here's some highlights"
"Patient got into the ceiling, couldn't get them down for a while."
"Patient milked themself into their coffee. Did you know some anti-psychotics make you lactate?"
"The entire adolescent unit escaping because maintenence forgot to lock the gate. Don't worry. They all came back eventually."
"And myself getting a concussion from a patient trying to escape, they weren't successful, but at least I didn't work for 6 weeks."
– NeverlandEnding
Character Performance
"The funniest thing I ever saw (spent total of about three years in in my teens and early 20's): a kid in seclusion who was having a genuinely good time making staff's life a living nightmare while he was in there, took apart the plastic mattress, tore the foam inside into small pieces, donned the empty mattress and started yelling 'I'M GUMBY, DAMMIT!' while tossing the pieces of foam around like confetti. Even most of the staff were laughing about it."
– t_portch
Physical violence seemed to be a common occurrence.
He Had A Violent Streak
"Not a patient but an employee. Had a 16 year old kid come in who was about 6'2 220 pounds. Built like a linebacker. I found out since he was technically a child he somehow ended up at an autism school for children with very little security. He ended up inflicting a TBI on one of the teachers and got sent to us. The kid had a violent streak the likes I hadn't seen before, he knew he was stronger than most and liked to fight unprovoked and it always took 4 to 6 people to restrain him. I never seen a patient spend more time than him in the 'safety room' an incredibly small padded room with nothing in it. His parents wouldnt authorize his move somewhere else and they wouldn't take him home either. We were not equipt for someone with his level of violence. So there he sat... For one and a half years..."
"It wasn't like a single incident that was crazy, it was the entire situation."
– DisagreeableFool
David And Wendy
"I was in an adolescent inpatient facility for 30 days. One kid named David who was very tall for his age, I think he was only 13. He insisted on watching Friday the 13th movies on movie nights and everyone was afraid to disagree with him because of his violent nature and frequent homicidal fantasies. He hated taking his meds, and probably 2 or 3 times a week he'd brawl with the psych nurses over it. No joke, it took 5 to 6 large grown men to overcome this kid. He was scary."
– better-off-ted
A Mother's Experience
"My mother worked in an asylum in Ireland when she was about 15. This was in the early 60s. She loved working there, despite the fact that some of the patients would physically try and kill her. One patient always stuck out to her, every day he would tell my mum he was going to kill her when she finished work. She knew he loved music, so would tell him she was out dancing that night, and could he wait until the next day, which he agreed to. The next day he would forget what he had said, and would threaten her again, and she'd say the say thing again. This went on for a couple of years that she worked there."
– tiredandstupid82
Turns out some patients weren't seeing a change of scenery any time soon.
Fighting To Stay
"I work inpatient and we had someone who was in for 2 1/2 years. They would try to take him out but he would start fighting immediately and eventually said he preferred it."
– Deathdad
Simon
I was a social worker at an institution that had a hall for what we called 'lifers,' it was essentially for people who had no hopes of ever being released due to their conditions. Anyway, my hall had 14 beds and it was full. There was this one guy who was huge. He was 6’7 and about 350. His name was Simon. He suffered from drug-induced schizophrenia and had bipolar disorder. He talked to himself all day, but never talked to others. All the other men in the ward were scared of him."
"It was my day to do first shift. I got there early to start on some paperwork I needed to finish. When I got my keys in the door, I heard Simon hit the door with his fists. I looked through the tiny window on the door and he and the hall was covered in blood. I panicked and called security for backup because I thought he had killed somebody."
"Turns out, Simon was in the throes of an extreme manic episode and had managed to walk the literal soles of his feet off. Other medication he was on thinned his blood and led to him bleeding all over the place."
"We checked the camera footage and he had walked and talked all night. The orderly (who was fired that day) had slept through his whole shift and never heard Simon walking back and forth."
– CamillaCream02
Some of these examples sound like they could patients in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, without Nurse Ratched tormenting them.
But props to the real humans who are compassionate and look after those who can't function alone in society.