First dates are tricky. Unless you've known the person for a long time, this is your initial opportunity to get to know someone else on a personal, potentially-romantic level. What do you say? What can you ask? What do you do with your hands? How much wine is too much wine? These are all great inquiries to pose to yourself, but, what should you say to the other person?
Let's learn.
Reddit user, u/throwawayanyday101, wanted to know about:
What are some interesting questions to ask on a 1st date?
A Beautiful Start
season 3 homer GIF
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Absolutely swear by it.. "what's your favorite dinosaur?" shatters the ice with someone that has a sense of humor. If it doesn't the person has a chip on their shoulder and cautious with the advance. May be a trap.
I remember asking a girl her favorite animal, and she said she hated animals so maybe dinosaurs because they're all dead. Completely serious.
Sometimes you can find red flags real quick with these questions.
Not A Journey You Want To Start With Someone
I drew her a picture of Professor Oak, three Pokéballs, and Charmander, Bulbasaur, and Squirtle. I asked her which one she liked. All she said was that it was a super-cute picture. She had no idea what Professor Oak, Bulbasaur, Charmander, or Squirtle were.
That should have been a giant red flag, but of course I missed it.
Tyrannosaurus!
Who is your favorite Power Ranger and why is [it] the Red Ranger?
Sounds super dumb but I like it because I can tell a lot of things based on her reactions.
Own Up To What's Happened Before.
If past relationships come up, instead of asking what their ex did wrong (which I'm sure they will cover), ask them how they think they could have handled the situation better and how they've grown from the experience. If they have trouble coming up with an answer, that's a red flag; you want a partner that is willing to admit when they f-cked up, and is willing to admit to their faults (past and present) and knows how they have/are working on them.
I learnt this from a guy I dated for a short time recently. He refused to admit any blame for anything that went wrong in the short time we spent together. This could've been predicted by the fact that he blamed his ex's for everything that contributed to the end of their relationship.
What Kind Of Fun Are We Really Talking?
what's the most fun you've had for free?
What's the most expensive fun you've had?
When's the last time you peed your pants?
Would you be willing to do it again?
Start With Questions, Then Follow
More important than having interesting questions pre-loaded is just asking follow up questions to things they talk about and showing curiosity in everyday aspects of their life.
With the "ice breaker" questions being thrown out in this thread, I think they can be fun if it's clear you realize you're being kind of silly by asking them. But very earnestly asking a date some random ice breaker question can give off an interview vibe.
More Importantly, Where Did You Find Those Coconuts?
What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?
african or european?
Just Be Clear On This Last Part
What do you fantasize about regularly that doesn't involve sex?
Another Home Run
"What's your favorite quote?" Answers range from an inspirational mantra, some kinda pop culture reference, a line from an obscure song, and on and on. Can tell you a lot about a person by how they respond.
But what if she says "live, laugh, love"?
That's a red flag if I've ever seen one
This'll Weed People Out Really Easily.
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Do you prefer 5e Fighters to optimize a heavy weapon, Strength build or a lighter weapon Dexterity build? Do you see Charisma as a dump stat or do you find it useful for social skill challenges?
Finding Where The Passions Lie
What are you passionate about?
I like this because I think it's beautiful getting to see someone light up while they talk about the thing that means the most to them. Even better if it's something you feel similarly towards because it's a great thing to bond over. It also breaks the ice. I know when I start talking about my passion, I could go on forever. Before you know it you're comfortable and the rest of the date is smooth, not awkward, and you finish the night feeling closer to that person because the conversation after feels natural rather than forced.
It's also nice to be able to weed out the people who aren't going to care enough to listen or who can't carry on a conversation. I've had people nod along and they had no idea what I said and I've had people who were engaged in the conversation and truly cared about my words.
When It Makes Sense In Your Mind
My wife told me she went on a date once—a blind date, as I recall—and the guy asked her if she could be any rock star, which one would she be. She thought is was so silly and apparently the date didn't go well for other reasons. Honestly, I sort of felt bad for the guy. When she told me that, I thought, geez, that sounds like something I'd ask on a first date.
Let's Find Out Right Away
Is there anyone in your life right now that would be upset if they found out we were on this date right now?
Anywhere In Time And Space...Where Do You Want To Go?
If you could travel anywhere and to any time just to witness/experience one event, what would it be?
It's a cool ice breaker to use in general, not just on dates but also in group settings.
What Burns In Your Heart?
What's your passions? If someone asked me this, I'd end up talking about things I like, and if I'm talking about things I like, I'd likely have a positive association with the company who took interest. Plus it lets you know whether they geek out over things you find interesting, intriguing, or downright horrifying.
A True Peek Into Their Digital Soul
Ask them what their phone background is, it's a good way to find out what's important to them
Swing For The Fences
So... got any life regrets?
- my barber, the first time I ever visited him
Sometimes, It's Not As Hard As You Might Think
Homer Simpson Fox GIF by Animation Domination
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Every first date I've had that's gone well, I didn't have to have a prompt of questions. Conversation just flowed naturally. As someone on the spectrum, it's incredibly rare for that to happen.
But, as a safety measure, never hurts to ask about jobs, pets, where they grew up, social security numbers, dates of birth...(might want to just stick with the first three, actually).
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But on occasion, some people in relationships go off in pursuit of one-sided pleasures in secret for various reasons.
These can range from going out to a vegan restaurant when the other person is a carnivore to seeing a Netflix show that is too violent for a squeamish significant other.
Because not every significant other may not share the same passion, Redditors TheTinRam asked:
"What’s a guilty pleasure you hide from your significant other?"
These Redditors needed some "me time."
Dad Time
"Everytime I go on a late night grocery run (once or twice a month) because I work nights, and my wife forgot to grab whatever, I add a $0.70 Mexican soda to the cart. It is just for me. It is something my dad used to get me on especially long days when I was a kid 'helping' him on jobsites. It is my tiny reminder of him."
– thecountnotthesaint
Story For No One
"I write stories for years now, some of the times she thinks I'm working on the computer but I'm actually writing a story. There is nothing to hide but I just keep it to myself, none of my family members know I write stories. Till today I have written 56 stories (most of them are short)."
– SuvenPan
In The Wee Small Hours Of The Morning
"Staying up late for peace and quiet."
– Blue_OG_46
Chatting For One
"I talk to myself all the time, I was actually wondering last night if it was a really weird thing to do lol"
– hottytoddy_sko
Naked And Sacred
"I will cruise the house butt naked and just do whatever the hell I want. About once a month. I won’t be able to this summer because the kids will be back in school, but come August, I’ll be naked and free again!"
– batchofbetterbutter
Some people need to get out of the house.
Self Therapy
"Sometimes I take the long way home and talk to myself in the car about my 'problems' - like Self Therapy. I put one earbud in so ppl think I could be on the phone."
"I get quite animated. It helps to get a stressful day out of my system before I get home and switch gears."
– Humble-Plankton2217
Solo Slice
"My husband has gluten sensitivity. If he eats regular pizza, his stomach hurts for a couple of days after."
"Well, I don't, so sometimes I say I'm going for a run, and I do run.... to the pizza store, eat a slice, and run back."
– sohumsahm
Catching Up With The Boys
"Covid has messed it up for a bit now. But every 3 or so months the boys and I all get up like we are going to work at our respective jobs but instead all call in sick and meet for breakfast, then go back to our one buddies place for the day to hangout. Around 4 or 5 one by one we all head home for our normal arrival time."
"It's literally the only way for us all to get together reliably. Most of us have known each other for the better part of 30 years now, going way back to junior kindergarten for some."
"Twice I have let her know my plan for the day and twice I have gotten phone calls to come home early for what ever not some emergency. So now we do it secretly."
– foh242
Some of the things people do behind their SO's backs is for endearing reasons.
Smooch Ploy
"I don’t know if this is a guilty pleasure necessarily but I pretend to be asleep when he comes home from work because he always kisses me on the forehead."
– str8outofabook
Catching Zzzs
"I love when she snores."
"She complains (only lightly) about my snoring all the time, and I always feel awful that I make it tricky for her to get a good night's sleep. When she's snoring, I know she's actually going to rest well, and it makes me happy."
– ricdesi
Scent Of A Man
"Smelling his clothes. Not creepily, like his boxers. But when he lets me borrow a shirt or a sweater I’ll put it on and just revel in the smell of him on his clothes. If I recall correctly, it definitely wasn’t like this when we first started dating. It’s been over two years now and I only remember doing this around the 7 month mark. He smells really, really good."
– he-whoeatsbugs
The Forever Admirer
"I have a whole album of 'unflattering' pictures of her. Not really something I hide, but they make me happy. She’s so silly yet so beautiful."
– Dewahll
They say that a couple that plays together, stays together.
That's all well and good. However, a significant other having some alone time should never be stigmatized.
My husband and I usually watch every TV show together, but I watch Netflix's Ozark by myself because I enjoy intense dramas, immensely.
It's not a secret. And he's glad I watch the shows that I want to watch on my own time–just like I encourage him to watch all those UFO documentaries that he's obsessed with, by himself.
No really, watch them without me.
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That's starting to get old.
"I bet you use that line a lot."- michaelochurch.
Right back atcha!
"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?"
"I AM!"- itskavia.
Who Am I GIF
You tell me.
"No, who do you think you are?"- Random_puns.
I'll have to ask someone else.
“'Hey Brian, I’ve got a guy here who doesn’t know who he is!'"
"'Do you know who he might be?'”- llovejoy1234.
customer service call center GIFGiphyI'll take a guess
"Ronnie Pickering."- Shadow_0852.
I'm getting a sense...
"I know who you think you are."- automoth.
I'll help you figure it out.
"My husband was working in construction."
"A guy came onto the job site giving the workers a hard time about something or other."
"When he started yelling at my husband for whatever, my husband basically ignored him."
"The guy goes, 'do you know who I am?'”
"My husband yelled across the site to his foreman, 'Joe! Call an ambulance, this guy doesn’t know who he is!'”- Littlepaintbrush0814.
Gotcha!
"Yes, and I've been trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty."- ShadyMyLady.
Rightfully put in their place.
"There is the old joke about the British Prime Minister eating out during the war time and asking for extra butter with his bread, the waiter refused to which the PM, rather annoyed, asked "'do you know who I am?'"
"To which the waiter replied, 'yes, I do, but rather importantly you have forgot who I am, I am the man who responsible for the rations of the butter'."- ScholarImpossible121
GiphyOf course, when people do dare to ask "do you know who I am", they never realize that the people they ask this immediately discover the answer.
Which is someone absolutely no one wants to be around.
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Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
But if there's one thing cinephiles roll their eyes at while watching a movie, it's the predictable plot twist or a typical scenario often depicted in films that lack imagination.
Curious to hear examples, Redditor cnukles1 asked:
"What's a movie trope you are sick and tired of?"
Hollywood tends to glorify and dramatize violence almost comically.
Brief Inconvenience
"When someone is stabbed/shot, limps around in pain for 30 seconds, then continues on as if nothing happened."
– FioreFalinesti
Instant Death
"On the flipside, it drives me nuts when bad guys get shot in the torso and drop dead immediately. They'd realistically have at least a few seconds if not minutes of consciousness."
– itguy1991
Smooth Recovery
"People being knocked out for hours and no brain damage."
– TankApprehensive3571
That doesn't happen in real life.
Atypical Casting
"The broke 'Single Mom' who looks like she could model for Victoria's Secret. On the flip side, male gangsters, drug dealers or prisoners who look like they could win a state bodybuilding championship."
– Johhnymaddog316
Unnecessary Extravagance
"Or same broke single mom with an awesome house and perfect clothes/hair. Can't they ever just dress like normal people and living in normal homes?"
– Expensive_Structure2
Disarming Explosives
"Bombs with helpful color-coded wires."
– SuvenPan
Inconvenient Birth
"There's a pregnant woman and she goes into labor right at the worst possible time. For drama of course."
– RogueKatt
When actions depicted on the screen are not plausible.
The Struggle Is Real
"Just once I'd like to see somebody struggle to find parking in Los Angeles."
– stupidlyugly
The Structure Of Romance
"You're a jerk and I have no interest in you despite the fact that you are incredibly handsome, charming, and funny. We have to work together to save the world but make no mistake about it, I can't stand you. Let's just get this over with so I never have to see you again."
"Whoops, we f'ked. I guess we're in love now."
– DickySchmidt33
Love Connections
"Every disaster movie, the love interest always works at a hospital."
– Terrible-Ad-4879
Let's Communicate Better
"When a simple conversation could have entirely solved the central conflict of the movie."
– Katarassein
If everything happened on screen the way it does in real life, would it diminish your moviegoing experience?
Some people just like watching characters make believable choices. But if that's the case, you may as well go outside and film your own movie.
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