UHaulDeezNuts asked: What is a subtle thing someone does that immediately makes you think they're an asshole?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Rude.
Two people side by side on a sidewalk walking toward you and they don't move over for you, so you have to step off the sidewalk as you pass. Selfish.
Don't step off. Assert your dominance.
By the way you can actually do this without fail if you just stop where you are and they will have to move to walk around you. They won't walk right into a still person.
If everyone else is a problem, look in a mirror.
When I meet someone who spends more than half their time complaining about other people they know.
Maybe one day they'll go all Michael and finally say: "the problem is me."
Edit: It's Michael from The Good Place. Everyone who guessed correctly gets one step closer to The Good Place.
If you can smell sh*t wherever you go, the only place you need to check is the bottom of your shoe.
Oy vey.
Interrupt me while I'm talking, so when I get a chance to talk again, I talk really fast so I can get my point across really quick. I hate that.
Also, when they bitch about everything. My aunt is one of these people. We went to Norway in August for my brothers wedding, and all she did was bitch about the food not being "American enough." Lady, you are in Europe, a once in a lifetime trip.... enjoy it!
Ah, yes, I had no clue that in Norway they would serve Norwegian food; very mysterious.
People who are insecure tend to diminish the success of others.
People that try to put down your successes like "Oh you just got a good grade? That's what you're supposed to do" "Oh you saved up to buy yourself a new car? Well couldn't you do a better job at finding a nicer looking car?" But then these people also magnify your failures.
I find that people who are insecure/jealous/bitter are the worst at this.
They try to bring you down to bring themselves up, very insecure/narcissistic on their part.
Enough about you, what about me?
Ask you how your day was (or something along those lines) only as a vehicle for them to tell you about their day. I hate it when I can sense they are just waiting for me to finish talking so they can talk about themselves.
Like, come on, at least listen to what I have to say and pretend to care.
Or maybe I'm just the asshole. Who knows.
I work with a guy like this. Sometimes he doesn't even wait for me to finish answering the question he just asked me before he starts talking about himself.
I had a boss who did this in the mornings when he said Hi to everyone on the way to his office, then bye to the evening staff as he left. It was funny because he'd ask questions about stuff he knows about you but only expect a small response so he can continue making the rounds.
*walking towards your desk* "HEY BRO YOU GET YOUR CAR FIXED?" *fist bump*
"Well we took it to a couple of shops but still not sure if we--"
*already walking away* "HAHA YEAH MAN. GET PUMPED, LETS HAVE A GOOD DAY TODAY"
I much rather have this manager than one that only talks to me to shit on my day.
At least pretend to care.
- Try to make everything about themselves.
- Never listen to what you are saying but will complain when you didn't hear the part where they converted oxygen into carbon dioxide
This plus they cut you off when you try to speak. Usually I'm trying to help someone at work for example. I'm clearly and precisely explaining how they can fix their problem. They cut me off and go on about the problem. I let it happen once maybe twice then I just say "that's whatever you're talking about for ya" and walk away.
This lazy entitlement.
Not taking the time to throw away their trash after eating in a food court and just leaving it on the table.
I have a worse one. People who bring Starbucks to the grocery and just leave their empty cup wherever it's convenient. Missing box of cereal? I'll put my empty cup right here. F*ck those people.
"I'm creating jobs!" No, you're not. Cleaning people's job is to clean the area, not pick up your trash.
Ugh. Eqiquette, people.
People who try and get on the bus/train/elevator without letting people get off first.
I'm a bigger guy, and I can take up the whole doorway if I want. I LOVE staring people down when they try to do this.
Or people who stand still on the left side of the escalator.
It's okay to be wrong.
Not admit when they misspoke, misunderstood, or are wrong about something minor.
Never need to do this if you've never been wrong.
How to be insufferable, 101.
People who always have to one up you. I had a former friend who did this. If you were having a bad day, her day was worse. If something nice happened to you, either something better happened to her OR she would act like what you did wasn't that great.
I'm afraid I come across like this sometimes because I'll occasionally tell a similar story to try to relate or contextualize advice.
Self-realisation is the first step. I did this. Any story someone told, I would chime in with how the same thing or worse/better happened to me.
Sometime it is fine to share as it expresses camaraderie, but if you find yourself one-upping a lot, learn to hold it in and react to their story instead of trying to make it about your story. It really makes a difference.
If you really want to tell your story, listen to theirs fully first, give an opinion and think if it adds to the convo or not.
