People Share Stupid Jokes That Are So Dumb That They're Actually Funny

People Share Stupid Jokes That Are So Dumb That They're Actually Funny

[rebelmouse-image 18356212 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

But somehow still funny. You know you love bad jokes. I mean, we all do-no shade! So prepare yourself for Aweseom_'s thread of them:

What's a joke that's so stupid it's funny?

Yikes.

[rebelmouse-image 18356220 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Fish swimming upriver and bumps his head.

"Dam."

This Took Me A Second

[rebelmouse-image 18346635 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

The frustrated cannibal threw up his arms.

Uh-Oh Spaghettos

[rebelmouse-image 18356224 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Where do poor meatballs live?

The spaghetto.

Seems Obvious

[rebelmouse-image 18353478 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat?

Because if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat.

Not What You Expect, But True

[rebelmouse-image 18356228 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Why can't dinosaurs clap? Because they're dead.

Immune To Puns

[rebelmouse-image 18356229 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Why don't ants get sick?

Because they have little anty-bodies.

I Get It

[rebelmouse-image 18356230 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

What do you call a deer with no eyes?

"No eye deer"

What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?

"Still no eye deer"

Wait A Second...

[rebelmouse-image 18356231 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar?

They each got 6 months.

What Kind Of Deck?

[rebelmouse-image 18356232 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

This blonde is going door to door trying to find some paying work. She knocks on one door and a handsome older man opens it up.

"Hey mister, do you have any odd jobs I could do for cash?"

He looks her up and down and surmises that she's an idiot whom he can take advantage of.

"I'll give you ten dollars if you paint my porch. There's paint, brushes, ladders and everything you'll need next to the car in the garage."

"Sure, sounds great!"

The man closes the door, chuckling at what a great deal he's just brokered. Half an hour later, there's another knock at the door. He opens it up and there's the blonde.

"You're finished already?" he asked her incredulously.

"Yeah! It isn't really that big! But I think you should know, that's not a porch. It's a Jaguar!"

Punctuation Jokes

[rebelmouse-image 18356234 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

There are no divorce courts at the North Pole, so when Santa and his wife wanted to split up, they got a semicolon.

They're great for separating independent Clauses.

A Carron't Even

[rebelmouse-image 18356235 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

What's orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot

Garten

[rebelmouse-image 18356236 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

No matter how kind you are, German children will always be Kinder.

Wait For It...

[rebelmouse-image 18356238 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

How do you think the unthinkable?

With an itheberg.

Arrrrgh

[rebelmouse-image 18349806 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

There was a thread yesterday, I think, and the question was something along the lines of "what part of your body would you get rid of?"

Some guy responded "My spine. It holds me back."

I f-ckin' died, especially when people were having pirate reactions. Holy sh-t.

Who Won Third?

[rebelmouse-image 18356239 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

And so the Lord said unto John, "Come forth; and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

Once Again, You Got Me

[rebelmouse-image 18350967 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

What animal can jump higher than a house?

All of them... houses can't jump.

Ceremonious

[rebelmouse-image 18356240 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!

You're Not Wrong

[rebelmouse-image 18356241 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

What's grey and can't swim?

A castle.

Where Is Cinderella?

[rebelmouse-image 18356243 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Why do mice have small balls?

Not many of them know how to dance.

Seems Legit

[rebelmouse-image 18356244 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

What do cigarettes and squirrels have in common? Neither one will hurt you unless you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.

Oh Grandpa

[rebelmouse-image 18356245 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before kicking the bucket. "Hey wanna see how far I can kick this bucket?"

Once Again, Not Wrong?

[rebelmouse-image 18356247 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

What do a grape and a rabbit have in common?

They're both purple except for the rabbit

The Snail Did His Best

[rebelmouse-image 18356249 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Guy walks out his front door, sees a snail on the sidewalk, picks it up throws it over his shoulder. It hits the roof, rolls to the top, down the other side, lands in the back yard. Six months later, guy walks out his front door, looks down, snail says, "What the f-ck was that all about?"

This One Works In The Internet Age

[rebelmouse-image 18356250 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

What is Harry Potters favorite method of getting down a hill?

Walking

.

.

.

JK, Rolling.

Chickens Don't Fly, They Drive

[rebelmouse-image 18356251 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Why does a chicken coop have two doors?

Because if it had four doors, it would be a chicken sedan.

People Explain Which Professions They Have Absolutely No Respect For
Photo by Razvan Chisu on Unsplash

Have you ever heard of a certain job that people call a career and thought... "PEOPLE PAY YOU FOR THAT?!?!"

All hard, honest work is good work.

And then there is just trash work.

And I don't mean garbage collection, that is honest work.

I don't know how some people live with themselves.

Redditor MrTuxedo1 wanted to discuss the careers they don't believe people should chase. They asked:

"What job do you have no respect for?"
Keep reading... Show less

The nose is constantly being attacked by odors of the world.

Going through one day without having to hold my breath during a certain point, is a miracle.

Of course, I'm a New Yorker, so I maybe exaggerating for people in the countryside.

What's funnier is odors that are pleasant, that shouldn't be.

Have you ever looked and something and thought... "yuck."

But then you smelled it and it was like... "oh lovely,"

Redditor HappQueue wanted to know what aromas are arousing to the senses that may come as a surprise to many. They asked:

"What smells good but shouldn't?"
Keep reading... Show less
People Explain Which Things They've Lost That They'd Love To Be Reunited With
Barrett Ward on Unsplash

At one point in time, we've misplaced things that we've considered priceless possessions.

Keep reading... Show less
People Imagine How They'd Survive A Deadly Home Invasion
Maxim Hopman on Unsplash

What's worse than returning home from a night out or a workday and discovering your home was broken into? Being home when the break-in happens.

Keep reading... Show less