People Who've Seen Something Strange While Driving And Pulled Over To Investigate Share Their Story
What is happening here?
The things that go bump in the night, on the dark roads of the land, they haunt us. Who knows what is out there. When we're driving our attention too often is distracted, most of the time it's for superfluous reasons like a text, which can lead to death. But sometimes we see things that make us do a double take so we must know more. The road has secrets and drama. So buckle up!
Redditor u/Gonzapex wanted to hear from everyone a few tales about those times when driving became an "Agatha Christie" moment by asking....
People who saw "something" next to the road and stopped to take a look, what's your story?
nobody else around.....
GiphyNear my house by an intersection, guy dressed in leather and a huge trench coat was stabbing a skateboard with a weird sword. Around 10 on a Sunday night, nobody else around. LifetimeOfLemons
Hey Iron....
The wife was driving when I asked her if we could turn around because I saw something on the side of the road that I was instantly sure was a rubber 1990s WWF Iron Sheik action figure.
We turned around, and she slowed down as I opened the door and scooped up what was 100% a rubber 1990s WWF Iron Sheik action figure.
He now lives in the ceiling beams of the laundry room where he watches over the washer.
Edit: as requested, here is pic #1 of the man, himself: Ptooey
....And here he is in his laundry-humbling perchDyko
I found some gourds!
I found some gourds! But they were too tough to cut into with my pocketknife and smelled like terrible body odor so I left them.
Another time while out biking I saw a ski in the gutter. A few blocks farther, I found the other ski, so I picked it up and went back for the first one. On the way home with a pair of skis across the handlebars, I found another pair of skis in the gutter so I took those home too. My mom was absolutely baffled when I rolled up to the house. egmalone
The Shock.
My brother was driving 100 down the highway at night and swore he saw a guy right next to the road. He turned around the first chance he could and sent to look to see if he was ok. This was in the middle of no where and he had his wife and 3 kids in the back. Wife saw it too. They really only got back to the spot about 5-10 minutes later and couldn't see anything.
They called the police of the nearby town and met the officer there. My brother and the officer looked around a bit more while his wife stayed in the car. Eventually they gave up and drove home. The officer said he would look a bit more. The next day he got a call from the officer. He found the guy in diabetic shock some ways from the road.
Got him to the hospital and he lived. He had left a bar and started walking down the highway. He was found about 4 km from the bar outside a tiny town. Brother definitely saved the guy's life. discostud1515
Not Cool.
It was a box with a paper taped to the top that said "RIP Someone's Poor Dead Kitty."
I was in a college town so I figured it might be a prank, like someone was doing a "Schrodinger's Cat" bit.
Nope, there sure was someone's dead cat in that box. chris_courtland
Runaway Crusher....
GiphyWe were driving and my boyfriend stopped the car all of a sudden and put his hazard lights on. The car behind us thought we were stopping for no reason. He got angry and cut in front of us and ran over the old man who was laying in middle of the road. The old man fell and was not able to get up and now....... his leg was crushed.
And when the driver realized what he had done, he drove away at the speed of light. Nonewnews_
Finding the Shimmer....
I saw what appeared to be a diamond necklace fly by in a glittery blur on the freeway shoulder. Thinking some girlfriend angrily tossed it out of a speeding car to make her cheating boyfriend upset, I turned around at the next off ramp and went back to stop and collect my payday.
It was just one of those stupid ass fake diamond license plate frames.
I have an active imagination and an empty wallet. ObiWan-Shinoobi
A Great Day.
GiphyThought I had seen a turtle.
I pulled over.
It was a turtle.
That was a great day. SimplisticFox
ROAR!!!
I didn't stop, but my girlfriend at the time and I saw a mountain lion (cougar/puma) standing on the side of the road in Connecticut around 2008.
There haven't been mountain lions here for 100 years.
No one believed us, until a few years later, when one got run over on the highway. FastWalkingShortGuy
I miss my Flower now.
In a muddy ditch me and my sisters got out to see a filthy dog drowning in this mud pit. My sister jumped in, drug the dog out, and we took it in. The owner of the dog had apparently gotten sick of her and let her out in the middle of the busy road. He didn't want her anymore so he gave her to us. She was a mixed Pitbull terrier we named Flower who lived with us for 13 years.
I miss my Flower now. She was one of the kindest dogs I ever had. Chefshipwreck5897
Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "" to +1 (310) 299-9390 to talk to him about it.
People Break Down The Absolute Worst Professions To Go Into
Reddit user NocturnalMemeLord asked: 'What are the worst companies to work for or the worst professions to have?'
When picking a career, it's a good idea to talk to people who have been in the professions you're considering for quite some time.
My parents wanted me to become a doctor, but I was ambivalent to the idea.
My discussions with veteran doctors convinced me there was no way I wanted to go into medicine.
So what are some other not so great jobs?
Reddit user NocturnalMemeLord asked:
"What are the ...worst professions to have?"
Thanks, Ron
"The worst job to have is being a teacher and the worst company to work for is the Florida Department of Education."
~ Phycopathic
"My poor wife trying to battle school admin for an ounce of support. Such a stressful place to live."
~ Firebird117
Ring, Ring
"Call center employee."
"I only did the job for a couple places and for a mercifully short time, but oh my holy God that gig is soul-crushing."
~ gogojack
"I worked in a call center for Cox Communications. All the upselling, pressure from supervisors, demand on stats, it made me depressed."
"I worked there 2 and half years and it was not until I left I realized majority of my time there I was depressed. I just did not care hardly about life."
"I'm much better now, much happier. I kept journals from that time, and I've reread them. I would not recognize myself from that person then."
~ UnusualLight0
Com On
"I won’t name the company I worked for (it rhymes with Bomcast), but call center was the most draining experience ever."
"Limited tools to help very (and justifiably) angry customers, coworkers that mess up then pass the problem to you, and AI tools testing job performance that feel BEYOND rigged against you."
~ Antiumbra
"I worked for Comcast in their retention call center. Most depressing job I've ever had."
"Getting cursed at every single day and they expected us to hit sales. My friend from there has a call recorded of a dude telling her to kill herself."
"Every change they made to the TV packages was sh*tty for the customer and I knew it'd just be months of getting yelled at for the same thing."
"Nothing like the God awful phone tree to really prime people up getting pissed before they finally manage to talk to a live person."
~ DomoInMySoup
Beaten By the Beat
"I am a journalist. My son just got his first job at the convenience store around the corner."
"He makes more than I do. I love my work but don't go into journalism for the money."
"Yeah, I definitely don't make enough for the therapy all those courtroom photos have put me in, for sure."
"My publication (print) is a small one, in a small town."
"That means when tragedy strikes and I have to cover it, it is, very often, someone I know."
~ LizardPossum
Live at Five
"Came to say local TV News Producer/Reporter. Low pay, high stress and toxic work environments."
~ zhitsngigglez
"Which is a real shame since local news was always so important but is now disappearing in many places, and that tends to have many negative consequences at the city/municipal/community level."
"Local news acts as something of a public service at the community level, educating and shining lights on important issues facing communities while seeking to provide the information necessary for citizens to solve those problems (or making informed votes for people who can/will solve them)."
"Unfortunately, local news rarely has the audience or reach to pay for itself, then they get gobbled up by larger regional/national chains, start focusing less on local issues and more on pushing provincial/state or national narratives of the big chain, then dismantled and shuttered as cost-saving measures by the struggling national chain."
~ Infamous-Mixture-605
*cough*
"Shisha/ hookah lounge worker."
"Late hours, usually minimum wage and you might as well smoke 20 packs of cigarettes a day because you have to start up the hookah for your customers and constantly be around fumes."
"You're basically burning up your lungs for barely a living."
~ homehermitaliv
Helping Those Who Don't Want Help
"Therapist in a skilled nursing facility."
"Pressure to give therapy to residents who don’t want it or need it; pressure to bill 90% of your day with NO excuses; no paid holidays; no over time, no raises unless you change jobs starting over with 1 week vacation/year."
"And of course giving customer service to people who are sick/not feeling their best."
~ Help_I_am_a_bug
"My wife is a therapist. She has done therapy in treatment centers a lot and dealt with a lot of people who didn't want to be there but were court ordered."
"Given therapy to people who are there sometimes because it is that or prison."
"Talk about people who don't want to do therapy. And it was for a non profit, so wages were low."
"Also she was on a team that worked only with chronically homeless people at a different time."
"It was hard but very important work. She would often go to places most people are afraid of."
"But now she runs her own private practice. She still has a tendency to take on too many clients that take a large toll on her, she refuses to take 'boring' clients, but she is much happier."
~ VulfSki
Have You Tried Turning It Off
"Never do general tech support, 100% of the clientele are old people who don't know how to use computers and basically get scammed into signing up for your tech support services."
"Legally it's not a scam because they make the customer sign all these waivers to protect the company from getting in trouble for scamming them."
~ Redditor
Now We're Cooking
"Chef."
"Life is unfortunately as bad as the rumors says."
"Nothing lives long in that world."
~ ThePinkyArmy
"And it seems to suck on every level from frying burgers in a bar to three Michelin stars, there is no cushy position at all."
~ OldMork
Like a Puzzle
"Working for my self installing tile. The worst career. Glad I am retired from that profession."
~ Lucky4you21
"My father installed floors for a living and would occasionally install ceramic tile. The pay, as well as the standards, varied widely throughout the country."
"Arizona was probably the worst, he made less than half what he made in the northeast (New York and Pennsylvania)."
"I worked with him a lot during my childhood and as young adult, but I never wanted to do it as a career."
"The work is just too physically demanding and every day was a new adventure in stress as you encountered inevitable problems and challenges on the job."
~ HeartyDogStew
At Risk
"Any kind of residential facility for 'at risk kids'."
"It's like being a teacher, but 3/4 of your group is that kid and you don't have a lesson plan, and you're with them all day, and you get paid less."
"Only upside is my facility was quasi-military, and the first few weeks is like a boot camp, and if you establish yourself right away as someone not to be messed with and maintain it, your days are a bit easier."
~ endless-reproachment
Fresh Air Doesn't Pay the Bills
"Forestry technician is an awful career path."
"You are required a post secondary education, and you get paid about as much as a McDonalds worker often to risk your life and safety in deep bush.
"However, you do get to drive quads and shoot guns on the clock."
~ osamabeenpoopin
"Hiking around the forest is damn fun though."
"Running into cougars and moose, taking your lunch on a mountaintop...
"I miss it. I made way more sitting at a desk but I was bored to oblivion."
"I have permanent scars and about a dozen pairs of trashed jeans from those damned jackstraw piles."
"Still, I'd rather be ripped up by downed trees and stalked by cougars all day than sit at a computer for the rest of my life."
~ Competitive-Air-6531
Not a Rx for Happiness
"Pharmacy tech. Lunch breaks were just approved due to a mass exodus during Covid. We didn’t use to get them in retail. We still don’t on my night shift."
"Every single second of my 12 hr shift was on my feet, never sitting down, never looking at my phone, never taking a break, never getting a lunch. Doctors yelling, nurses yelling, patients dieing and having to carefully use a needle and drugs to spike a bag."
"We couldn’t wear any makeup or have nails done (IV pharmacy). Constant turnover. For $20/hr."
"I got denied asking for a vacation I put in for 3 months prior because they couldn’t find anyone to cover me and told me to find it myself."
"Pharmacy techs and pharmacists are severely underpaid nowadays for the stress that they endure. And many are quitting."
"It was hard as heck to get a job as a pharmacy tech in the 2000s—you had to network! That’s why so many retail pharmacies are cutting hours and closing."
"Getting berated by customers because their insurance companies suck (not the customers fault though!), worrying about being held at gun point because that has happened to me in retail, and not trying to accidentally kill someone with the wrong dose."
"There are many people who have zero college experience or an associates/bachelors degree that make more than pharmacists!"
"Meanwhile pharmacists have $100k student loan debt for a doctorate degree barely making $100k in some places for a DOCTORATE degree. Insane to me!"
~ vanillaroseeee
Well, Actually...
"The guy that pumped my septic. That looked like a sh*tty job."
~ Ok_Accountant1529
"That's what I thought about septic installers too but then I had mine redone and I actually think that installing (not pumping) systems would be a good gig."
~ H34thcliff
"I live in an area where most people are on septic and have dealt with a lot of these guys."
"I can tell you to a man, they own the vac truck, make you see the before and after, and then fix your sh*t. Always good honest guys."
"Also, I think they make a pretty decent living."
~ Badfish1060
Well, you read it here.
Septic installation and pumping is the profession of choice.
What do you think?
When I started college, I had every intention of cooking all my meals. It became very apparent very quickly that I simply didn't have the time to accomplish this, and I became the Takeout Queen.
I ordered food constantly. Between getting a monthly "allowance" from my dad (intended to go towards groceries), finding coupons taped to my apartment door everyday, and essentially being "allowed" to tip less than handsomely since I was a college student, I was able to afford this.
When I graduated and moved into my own place, things changed. I was too old to not tip properly, I didn't get any supplementary money from my family, and I had more expenses, such as rent. Still, I continued to order food, and it became my main expense.
My friends tell me the way I order food is only meant for "rich people." I have to skimp on everything else in order to have enough saved to support this. It's definitely true, but I don't think this habit will ever change.
I'm not the only one that does "rich people stuff." Redditors do lots of things that is classified that way, despite not being rich, and they are ready to share their stories.
It all started when Redditor Abbas_Noorani 16 asked:
"What is some rich sh*t you do even though you are not rich?"
Ravenous
"Food. I buy what I want and I try new stuff. I like cooking."
– 34i79s
"Grocery shopping without concern for budget is what made me realize I had made it back in the day. Good times."
"Now I have hard budgets again and it truly sucks. You question every damn decision and convince yourself to do without or downgrade to the lowest priced quality."
– txmail
"On the same boat. The other day I looked at expensive butter that I used to stock up on without even thinking twice and sighed."
– cat101786
Monthly
"Forget to cancel my free trial."
– Adept_Insurance5550
"Damn. Thanks for the reminder."
– -Bk7
"I'm still a member of AOL."
– __SpeedRacer__
Too Hot
"I leave the fridge door open when getting the butter out even though my dad said it would cost billions and send us to the streets."
– frank-sarno
"I leave the front door open when I pop out to grab my mail. Took me years of living on my own to realize the AC bill doesn’t shoot up by hundreds of dollars if I do that."
– MelodramaticQuarter
Necessities
"Buy the good toilet paper."
– FrankGehryNuman
"Absolutely!"
"Good toilet paper. Can't stand cheapo toilet paper, you give yourself a surprise when your finger goes through the paper when wiping your chuff. Don't get me started on that stuff they used to have in hospitals! It was awful - sandpaper that didn't soak up but rather moved stuff 🤐"
– helensmelon
Clean And Sweep
"I have a maid that comes weekly. I've found that my sanity is worth the cost."
– Eringobraugh2021
"Weekly? Oo la la!"
– a**ypantz72
Comfort Matters
"My thermostat stays at the temperature setting of what is most comfortable to me and nothing will change that."
– Cyb3rTruk
"Lol this really outlined how different climates can be. My thought was "Yeah, I'm going to be as cozy and warm as I want and not freeze in the comfort of my own home.""
– McCoyIsFun
Double
"Some days I have two sandwiches at lunch. I smile as I watch all my fellow proletariat eating their single sandwich."
– ShambolicPaul
"Brotip: Cut your sandwich an infinite number of times and rearrange the pieces into two full sandwiches. Don't give your money away to Big Sandwich!"
– NotInherentAfterAll
Sparkling
"Paying for car cleaning."
– angydevil
"Justified, tho my dad would kill me."
– Abbas_Noorani
The Big Cheese
"I sometimes buy name brand cheese instead of the store brand."
– NeuroguyNC
"Tillamook or nothing for me! I’ll buy store brand beans and paper towels and other stuff. But not for my cheese!"
– VariegatedThumb
Replenish
"We have a garage fridge that is full of all different kinds of beverages."
– SixStinkyFingers
"It's not the fridge itself, it's keeping it stocked!"
– 4x32Studio
A House Is A Home
"I own a house...."
– 1d0m1n4t3
"Oh damn rich people sh*t."
– Abbas_Noorani
"We shouldn't be able to joke about owning a modest home being rich people sh*t. Anyone who works full time should be able to afford a home."
– 1d0m1n4t3
Write Better
"I buy the gel comfort pens. Makes me feel I'm a higher class when writing at work. Smooth crisp consistent ink."
– UltraCoolPimpDaddy
"I have gotten into arguments over people stealing my G2 .07."
– savvyspoon2
Me Too!
"I buy small trash bags for the bathroom trash bins. My whole family uses grocery bags, but I don’t like how they always rip at the bottom."
– Deleted User
It's Required!
"No Margarine in my house, Butter Only, and lots of it. My arteries think I'm rich."
– weisblattsnut
Unused
"I have HBO but I don’t watch it."
– MillionToOneShotDoc
"I have Netflix, Prime, Hulu, and Disney Plus. Don’t watch any of it. Watch YouTube all the time and I’m too stupid to get Premium."
– AngryDerf
Now, that's the definition of having money to burn!
Of course, I wouldn't know. I need to save money for my food!
Married People Divulge What They Realized Only After Tying The Knot
Generally, when people talk about marriage, they get excited about the big wedding day and the honeymoon thereafter.
People don't always talk about what happens in the marriage after the "honeymoon phase" wears off, and they certainly don't talk about the other long-term realities of marrying someone for life.
Pondering this, Redditor Ok_Reality-77 asked:
"What did you realize after getting married?"
It's Not All Romantic
"Marriage isn’t just about the person you want to have fun with. It’s also about the person you want to spend $10,000 on a new furnace with, or go to a funeral with, or get a flat tire with."
"Your spouse should make your way in life easier, especially during the hard times."
- aggressivelysingle
Wedding Invitation Drama
"I don’t get upset if I don’t make the cut for someone else’s wedding, that s**t is expensive."
- coconutmama77
"I had one wedding where I got pretty ticked off about not being invited, to be honest."
"One of the bridesmaids at my wedding got married a few years after we did. She was out in Baltimore, and we are UK-based, but she wanted my wife as her bridesmaid too, so we of course flew over. We were the only ones not local."
"In the rehearsal the day before, one of the groomsmen wasn't there, so I stood in for him."
"Then later that night, I was told that the wedding was a small affair and that only my wife was invited to the ceremony. I would be only an evening guest. They just neglected to mention that on the invite."
"It caused massive ripples among the guests because there was no reason for snubbing me like that."
"I really liked the groom and he was in bits trying to deal with the psycho fit his bride was throwing about everything, so I ended up just doing as told so as not to cause an issue for him on his day."
"Years later, she asked my wife on a video call if we wanted to come visit them sometime soon, and her husband said to her, 'You're kidding, right? You know he doesn't like you after the wedding s**t, right?'"
"She was shocked to learn that I thought she was an a**hole, lol (laughing out loud)."
- Wind_Yer_Neck_In
The Wrong Partner
"Bad marriage does way more harm than being alone."
- rosiebunnies
"When I left my first husband for being an irredeemable a**hat, I truly thought I’d sworn off marriage forever. But here I am, 14 years into my second marriage, and I couldn’t be more thankful that I was wrong about marriage being a bad thing."
- -comfypants
"I’ve had my own bad relationships. Then I started to look at my parents' unhealthy relationship but then saw that my brother actually has a really good one, and that helped put things into perspective. Some people should be together, and others should not."
- Lancefree
The Value of Disagreements
"That true partnership means conflict is inevitable but productive."
"Part of me knew we'd disagree, but I took some time to know the best way to work through it. It's not being a doormat and it's not being right every time."
- d20sapphire
The Importance of Alone Time
"How much I NEED alone time..."
- blacksweater
"We live in a house larger than we need. So we each have hobby areas and our own bathroom in addition to general s**t we don't do together. Our friends think it's weird, but we are strong as f**k, and their relationships didn't survive the pandemic."
- GoldenBarracudas
Secret Personalities
"People can be really, REALLY good at hiding who they truly are."
"People keep telling me I must have missed signs. I think they just haven’t encountered people that can change on a dime like my ex-husband."
- InstantElla
Increased Income
"How much easier it is to afford things as a joint couple with two incomes."
- Ornery-Cattle1051
"To me, this is one of the few downsides to being single. I like my single life but do not like my single income."
- SnoopsMan
Constant Forgiveness
"Marriage is a constant exercise in forgiveness."
"Be sure you love them, like for real."
"Luckily for me, I do."
- pussinbootskitty
Marrying the Family
"They say you marry their family. You absolutely do."
"One day I was a girlfriend, and the next I was holding my husband's grandmother's hand while she died. I was dragged into family fights the likes of which I'd never seen. I've been loved and weaponized and defended like I could never fathom."
"I laughed at people saying they married the whole family. I was so wrong."
- IHeartChipSammiches
"You put this into words so beautifully. I never would have imagined how much I love his family as my own, even though they bug the crap out of me sometimes, lol (laughing out loud)."
- chipmunk_butt
Communication is Key
"That good communication is vital to a relationship."
"The ability to have a calm, rational conversation over any topic is something to strive for. The trust that the two of you can talk about anything in a safe environment is key. The ability to be honest and open with each other."
"Communication, y'all. It works."
- agharta-astra
Ditch the Highway
"You spent X amount of years doing things your way. So has your new spouse. Just because it's not your way doesn't mean it's wrong."
"It's okay to compromise, but it's also okay to realize that some things may come down to My Way, Their Way, and Our Way."
"My husband and I learned a lot from each other but 15 years later, we have never, NEVER compromised on how to fold laundry so we just each do our own. I don't mind doing his, but I'll fold it my way. He'll easily wash and dry mine, but he folds his way. It's nice that the laundry is done, but then I had to refold everything."
"For those wondering, I fold shirts in a tri-fold rectangle and he does some weird square thing. Incompatible in our dresser drawers."
- Scucer
Hands and Height
"I have to add (this may sound bizarre) that if one of you is left-handed and the other is right-handed, you will most certainly run into some problems."
"It seems ridiculous, but where you place things that you need multiple times on a daily basis comes down to space and which hand you use (e.g., dish soap, hand soap, etc. Basically anything on a counter in a kitchen or a bathroom)."
"This also applies to height differences. Sometimes we really, literally have to find the in-between, or accept that one or the other will be doing it for themselves and it’s not insulting. It’s just really for the best sanity of us both."
- HGLiveEdge
Cherish the Time
"I must say, for me, it would be Time. Time moves SOOOOO very slow, and SOOOOOOOOOOOOO very fast."
"I married my wife yesterday."
"We closed on our first house yesterday."
"We had our boys YESTERDAY."
"I finished our basement with my own two hands (and my best friends’ hands) yesterday."
"We sold our first home yesterday."
"My father passed away YESTERDAY."
"My boys started high school and middle school yesterday."
"I just made an @ss of myself tonight and needed to apologize to my wife! (This actually was tonight.)"
"Seriously, everything feels like yesterday, but it is moving by so quickly. I’m just trying to hold on, thankfully, she’s here with me."
- pencerules
Marriage Plus Kids
"Everyone was wrong, marriage changed nothing."
"But children... Children change everything."
- korinth86
"100% agree. We lived together before we got married. Absolutely nothing in our relationship changed. But kids. Oh lord, that changes everything."
- StannVeal
Medically Responsible
"It changes who can kick whom out of the hospital room. And that was why I got married."
"My husband got married for the feel’s and the frilly stuff. I got married so he/we inherit each other's stuff and get the final say on end-of-life stuff (it was a rough couple of years, I lost a lot of family in a short span)."
"Can all that be done separately from marriage? YEP. Is it viewed as seriously? Nope. Can it be done as easily and in one fell swoop? Nope."
"(This, more than the feelings, to me, is why people should be able to marry whom they choose, regardless of gender.)"
- sageautumn
Right in the Feels
"I like saying, 'My wife…' even more than I thought I would."
"We’ve each been married before, and we were together for 7 years before we got around to getting married (we knew where it was going very early). I didn’t think it would feel like that big of a deal to say, but… I love my wife, and the experience of referring to her is enough to make me smile."
- BetweenCoffeeNSleep
While there were some tough realities mixed into this list, most of the experiences shared here were heartwarming.
Marriage might be diminished by some to be just a piece of paper, but for those who take the symbolism seriously, there is some real happiness in store for them.
Not everyone excels in the art of flirting, and who can blame them?
Getting the attention of someone you admire can be nerve-wracking, and your lack of confidence in the heat of the moment can be amplified and make you appear less attractive to the object of your affection.
Curious to hear examples of what to avoid in the pursuit of passion, Redditor Veetojek asked:
"What was the worst attempt at flirting you have ever seen?"
These advances are just genuinely bizarre.
Inept Pupil
"My friend in college started hanging out with 'pick up artists' and decided to demonstrate his prowess to us on the quad. His strat was to approach a girl and ask what she thought he should make for dinner that night (I guess it was supposed to lead to an invitation?) He then very-much-not-confidently approached a girl who was clearly in a hurry and, staring at the ground, delivered the line. The girl glared at him and, with great annoyance, said 'I have no idea! Spaghetti, or something?' And my buddy, still staring at the ground, said 'Oh-oh-ok. Uh, thanks' and shuffled away."
He also “learned” from this group that you’re supposed to touch a girl’s arm every time she laughs to condition her to associate your touch with a release of dopamine or endorphins or something. So I witnessed this several times as well, never done with any subtlety or charisma. He did finally get laid after about eight months of trying but the whole thing seemed creepy to me."
– Dr_broadnoodel
Weird Pitch
"It was me. In sixth grade I wrote a girl’s name on a rock and threw it at her during recess. Apparently they don’t like that 🤷🏻♂️"
– neon_eyeballs
"Did your approach change much from those days with the introduction of pokeballs?"
– OP
Stranger Danger
"On a walk with my dog, hot sweaty and not in the best clothes. This man drove behind me following me for a few minutes and I looked and said can I help you? He said let’s go on a date! Hop in!"
"I said no thanks and he revved his engine, asked if I was sure then sped off. I was legit scared."
– Allieora
These attempts at flirting are straight from a sitcom.
Down The Rabbit Hole
"A man asked a woman sitting next to me, 'I think your name is Alice since I'm lost in Wonderland.'"
– boukaree
"Oof. That made me cringe, imagining it."
– No_Letterhead_7683
Hairy Situation
"Guy on a trip saw a new girl in our group that he found cute. Decided to take the insult-as-a-form-of-flirting path and told her she had really hairy arms for a girl. Mind you, she had incredibly fair skin, so her hairs stood out more than usual. She, having too nice of a personality to say anything, laughed it off, covered her arm in a real smooth manner, and went on with whatever conversation was happening. My guy thought it worked because it 'made her laugh;' and you know you've got the green light when she laughs at your jokes. The next day he goes up to her during breakfast thinking he locked it up and exclaims, 'Oh my god your arms are so hairy that it's gonna make me sick!!' She doesn't laugh this time, runs back to her room, and changes into a long-sleeve shirt. She proceeded to wear long-sleeve shirts or sweaters for the remainder of the trip...in the middle of July. They didn't have a single interaction for the remaining 4 days."
– TYRONEmonies
Fumbling For Words
"My own. Drunk at a party talking to a cute girl she takes her glasses off. I thought this would be a good time for a genuine compliment. What my mouth said 'I like your face better with your glasses on' she just laughed. Pretty sure what I was trying to say is I like your glasses, and you have a pretty face. I just combined them."
– HooterEnthusiast
Clumsy Gymnast
"When I was in 3rd grade I had a crush on my babysitter."
"I decided to impress her by demonstrating my acrobatic prowess. I sprung from the side of a spiral slide and grabbed the monkey bars without touching the ground. Unfortunately, my hands slipped, I flipped through the air, and shattered my wrist in two places upon landing."
"My first thought was, 'Don't cry; be tough.' then I saw my wrist, it looked like a sine wave. I immediately started crying."
– ANerdCalledMike
Some guys come on way too strong
Hey, Barkeep!
"I saw two girls talking at a bar, and this guy walks up and interrupts them with a 'Heheheyyy, what are you ladies drinkin tonight eh? (Slaps the bar) Hey Barkeep, lemme get a couple rounds for these two!' They of course took the drinks, but promptly relocated away from that obnoxious dude."
– Xdude199
Bye, Scooter
"When I was younger I worked in a bar with a guy nicknamed 'Scooter.'"
"He'd say to any girl that was alone at the bar, 'Hi! My name is Scooter. I like to f'k. How do you like me so far?'"
"Some would glare and walk away, and a couple of times he got slapped across the face...but eventually he'd get a giggle."
"And he never went home alone."
– PJMurphy
Scene From A Gas Station
"When I was working at a gas station I had a dude just walk up to the register and just go ‘hey you have a boyfriend’"
"Of course he didn’t take ‘I’m not interested’ for an answer after. My assistant manager had to all put shove him out the door to get him to leave."
– SilverSoulFox
Daddy Cringey
"I worked in retail for a long time."
"I’ll never forget the time when this late 50s looking guy blatantly cat called an older woman who was wearing black boots. He said, 'Damn baby you gonna wear those boots all day for daddy?'. Then she goes, 'Not a chance.' He went quiet and she walked away. I had to hold in my laughter cause it was just so cringey to see."
– xSevusxBean4y
Either one's advances can come off as presumptuous and cocky or vulnerable and meek.
In most cases, people looking for love are overthinking it.
Here's a tip: Just relax and be yourself when approaching someone you like.
Being natural will not make you look desperate.
While there are no guarantees in scoring a date with this approach, chances are that with practice, you'll gain more confidence without overdoing it.