They're asking the important questions.

"'What channel is the baseball game on?'"

"I misunderstood because my question to him just before that was: '9-1-1 what is your emergency?'"

- chriscrutch

This teacher is almost done.

"'When is this due?'"

"After saying it out loud every day for a week, writing it in big letters on the board where it's been displayed for two weeks, handing out detailed instructions in writing on paper with the due date on it, publishing said document on two different online classroom platforms, and sending out an email with the due date included."

"I am a week and half from retiring after teaching for 36 years. I can't answer this question again. Not one more time."

- moinatx

"It kills me how completely disconnected some students are. I provide the same information in the syllabus, emails, web announcements, and in person (classroom or via video conference these days). Yet they are still shocked that a due date has passed, or even existed in the first place. They send me panicked emails with questions they could answer themselves with three mouse clicks. Instead of reading instructions, they make assumptions and then argue with me when they're wrong. (Why did you think this was at midnight? I've never said anything was due at midnight . . .)"

"I know its learned helplessness and there's not a lot I can do about it at the college level. I should be used to it after 15 years (OMG . . .) 17 years. But its still so frustrating!"

- paleo2002

Good thing we use email now.

"'How does paper get to the other side of a fax machine?'"

"I had to ask a few times if he was serious or being sarcastic."

"He was dead f*cking serious."

- bitterherpes

Maybe not...

"'If I give someone my email address doesn't that mean it's my email address?'

"To elaborate this lady thought she could just give people a random email address without actually creating the email and that the email account would just magically be created on its own. She didn't understand why she couldn't log into the email address she had been giving people for years, and why she got a phone call from a guy telling her it was his email address and to stop using it."

- mjsmore33

"Ugh, I feel his pain. I've had some dingbat in AZ using one of my email addresses for months. I keep getting notices for their cable and internet bills. The companies won't change it because I'm not the customer."

- katlain

"A person called having a problem with a web application I wrote. Now this application had been up and running for a year with no major modifications or issues so I was sure that it was a problem on their end. I went through some standard debugging questions and narrowed the issue down to their email address not being accepted by the system."

"They were using an AOL address, so I make sure they were including the "@aol.com" part. (Back in the day, AOL users would often forget this ) I did some more debugging but finally figured that they must have triggered some weird edge case bug that went unseen for a year."

"Just as I fired up my code editor, the person asked:"

"'Does the email need to go in the box labeled 'email address'?'"

"I had to mute the call to keep him breaking my professional demeanor and laughing at them. Then, I unmuted and told them that, yes, the application expects you to put your data in the boxes with the appropriate labels. She did this and her email was accepted immediately."

- TechyDad

"These are the same people who become online shoppers and email the seller questions that are answered right in the description of the product, which would be less work to read in the first place."

- katlian

"And leave scathing negative reviews that begin with them saying they didn't use the product properly/as directed."

- convertingcreative

Not the question we expect from a medical professional.

"Went to the doctor because I injured my left knee and she asked me how I was sure which knee was hurt. Because...it's the one that I hurt?"

- voicebread

"I once had a radiologist give me an x-ray. I assumed she wanted a couple of different angles so I let her work on the uninjured side of my body. Then she blamed me for not telling her the arm in the sling was the one that was hurt."

- bool_idiot_is_true

"I have bad luck with hospitals, and I have a really obvious lazy eye that barely works. I used to work at a paint department. I was filling the tint machine, the cans of tint couldn't be opened with a can opener of any kind. We we had to jam a putty knife in the top and cut it open. Some tint splashed up, right in my left eye, the good one. I wash it out, it's water soluble, and non-toxic. I get sent to the E.R., I had to walk to it. By the time I got there my visions was fine, but they checked me out anyway. The docs look me over, then leave for about 10-15 minutes. The nurse comes back, and says she's got good news and bad news."

"Your left eye is fine, no damage. There's something wrong with your right eye. It doesn't face fully forward, and it's vision is poor."

"I couldn't hold back my laughter, I didn't mean to laugh either. Everything got cleared up, except I see things with a hint of magenta...."

- Buhrdt

Oh, the irony!

"I'm legally blind. So for me its this one, 'What can't you see?'"

"How the f*ck do I know??! I can't see it."

- Crafty_Dragon_roll

"I have bad eyes. Well, I have bad vision in one eye and am completely blind in the other.

Talked with somebody last week, explained that I could not see in my right eye. 'Oh? Can you see light and dark at least?'"

"'No. Nothing. I can see just as much as I can with my right elbow.'"

"'Oh, but you really cannot see even light?'"

"'Can YOU see light with your right elbow?'"

"'No... oh! - That sucks.'"

a_sack_of_hampsters

Someone needs a geography lesson.

"'Is that Hawaii?'"

"Asked of me whilst we were standing on the Golden Gate Bridge."

- seekaegee

"Tisk. Tisk. Every body that has seen a map of the US knows that Hawaii is next to Alaska."

- Puppy-Zwolle

And maybe an astronomy lesson while we're at it.

"Deployed to Iraq and one one my Soldiers looked up and asked 'Sergeant, is that the same moon we have in the states?'"

- Monchichi4life

"I hope that Sergeant made the soldier sing 'Somewhere Out There.'"

- sevenbeef

How do trains even work?

"Several of us teens in a van on the way to camp, and this one girl (16 at the time) goes, 'Wait, how does the train get back up?'"

"A few of us: 'Huh?'"

"Her: 'The train tracks (points out window) go down the hill and then back up the hill. How doesn't the train just get stuck?'"

"One of us: 'Trains can go up hill, Tiffany.'"

"Tiff: 'Huh? how?'"

"Another of us: 'They have motors, they just drive. How is this van going uphill right now?'"

"Tiff (eyes lighting up): 'Ohhhh! Wait, I'm [silly!]'"

"True story."

- Joe-Schmeaux

An oops at TSA.

"Going through TSA I asked the person if she needed me to take my hooded sweatshirt off. I didn't mind because I had a shirt on underneath."

"She looked me dead in the eye and with a straight face asked 'is that your outermost garment?'"

"'Excuse me?'"

"'Is that your outermost garment?'"

"I looked down at myself then up again. 'Yes,' I said."

"'Then no, you can leave it on.'"

"I'll assume to this day she meant innermost. What a buffoon."

- FannyTwoTeeth

"'Why no, I'm wearing my invisibility cloak on top. It's a cloak that makes itself invisible.'"

- optcynsejo

Oh deer...

"The guy was about 55 at the time, he asked me how animals like deer/moose got the "Antlers" to stick to their heads."

"He thought they were sticks, that they made them in the shape of antlers and spent a lot of time finding sticks that looked the same."

"I had to do a double take on that one."

"Anyways they obviously use gorilla glue."

- Man_Bear_Beaver

"A lot of people aren't familiar with gorilla glue. I only know about it because I use it to style my hair."

- IwishIwasgoodatnamez

Isn't it obvious?

"I used to work at a late-night college pizza delivery place called 'We Deliver.' Every time someone would call we'd answer the phone with "We Deliver," I.e. the name of the actual store."

"People would still ask us 3-4 times a night if we delivered."

- Oh_umms_cocktails

I think you're thinking of something else...

"I was in line at burger King, there was a woman and her son before me in line. The woman orders her stuff, then dead serious asks the poor kid behind the counter, 'Do you have anything that is carbon free? My son is allergic to carbon and can't eat it.' The poor kid just looks at her, and says 'No.' I couldn't help but chuckle, his face a face of confusion, and holding back laughter."

"'Well, he'll just have a salad then.'"

- Buhrdt

"Is there any matter in your food? I'm allergic to matter."

- notacreaticedrummer

"Sorry does this burger come in antimatter?"

- Deetchy

The 4th of July

"One [person] I know asked my German friend what day do they celebrate the 4th of July?"

- PettyKruger

"I've worked for an international company with American co workers that have asked me what I was doing for 4th of July, I'm British, its like they've forgotten what they were celebrating."

- SCB360

While some of these questions are truly ridiculous, they're absolutely laughable now. Hopefully someone set these people straight!