I'm about to be 36 years old, and my high school friends still tease me about "the ramp incident" that happened in ninth grade. I used to want to crawl in a hole and die when they brought it up, but looking back on it now, I can admit it was probably hilarious. Long story short, I managed to fall down a large ramp because I thought strappy 90's heels were a great thing to wear to school when I had literally never worn heels before.
But whatever, I was already the youngest person in the school since I had skipped a grade and I wanted to be 90's cute so that I could be "cool." Strappy heels, a long skirt, and butterfly clips were the order of the day. Things did not go well. Not only did *I* fall, but since it was a large ramp and happened during class change at a crowded school, my short, stout,12-year-old self managed to take down several (like at least 2 dozen) students with me in a horrific human bowling/domino disaster. This ramp happened to dump into the very crowded cafeteria. The laughter of terribly hormonally awful high-school students still haunts my soul today.
One Reddit user, who apparently feels my pain, wanted to know about the memories we have of things that were terrible in the moment, but in retrospect are kind of hilarious. Here are some of the responses that left me cringing, cackling, and overall just feeling a little bit better about myself. Obviously, they've been edited for language or clarity where needed.
Not The Right Answer
One time when I was in 7th grade math class, the teacher asked a question that I actually knew the answer to, so when he asked the class which of us knew the answer, I enthusiastically shot my hand up. He didn't call on me. However, the girl he did call on got it wrong, so when he asked the rest of the class who could give the correct answer, I not only threw my hand up this time with even more fervor than the first attempt, but I accompanied it with a deal-sealing "I know!" as well.
This time he did call on me, and just as I went to triumphantly announce the proof of my mathematical prowess...I sneezed, the force of which caused me to blast the loudest fart I had ever produced in my theretofore young life.
As I turned 12 shades of crimson in the mortified embarrassment that only a 13 year-old kid who just farted in front of roomful of other merciless 13 year-old kids could feel, and said roomful of vengeful little bastards already roaring in laughter at me, my shame was only further deepened when the teacher, stifling himself from bursting out fits of laughter as well, confirmed to me and the rest of the class, "That's not the right answer either!"
This didn't happen in my childhood, but I'm pretty sure I ruined a few childhoods. I very briefly worked as a princess at childrens' birthday parties. Snow White, Cinderella, standard stuff. One day dispatch called me and told me I'd be playing Hello Kitty at a party. I didn't even know that was an option! But okay, fine. I go to pick up the costume and it's this giant fuzzy suit with a steel hula-hoop in the middle keeping it round and a giant head with some mesh in the mouth that I can barely see out of. This was going to be a long hour...
So I get to the party and it's outside in this family's backyard. I do all my schtick - face painting, balloon animals, magic tricks, but there's still about 15 mins left to kill so I ask the kids if they want to play a game. The kids have some random made-up game where you throw a ball and tag the tree and run back to a certain point or whatever, so I say fine, let's play.
Now, what I couldn't tell from the poor vision out of the mesh costume head was that the yard we were in was situated at the top of a very steep hill. I went to catch a ball and suddenly everything was spinning. I was rolling (the hula hoop kept it's shape, so my feet never touched the ground, I rolled like a giant fuzzy ball) down the hill. The giant head flew off and I landed at the bottom in a giant bush. I could see tiny heads peering over the side of the hill. Finally I heard a mom yell:
"Are you okay?"
"Do you need some help?"
It took three dads to roll me back up the hill because my center of gravity in this giant ball wouldn't allow me to climb back up this massive vertical hill. The head was dented, there were twigs sticking out of it. Half the kids were laughing, the other half were sobbing. I walked straight through the kitchen and out the front door without bothering to say I was leaving and see if I'd get a tip. I wanted to leave so badly I attempted to get into my Saturn with the suit still on, but that wasn't going to happen. I had to change awkwardly behind my car and left as quickly as possible.
Horrifying at the time. Thankfully this was pre-smart phones so it wasn't all over YouTube the next day. Although now I think I'd like to see it, it's pretty hilarious in retrospect.
A Little Tree
5th grade graduation:
I was selected to present some award to one of my teachers. No one told me anything about it, explained what would happen, etc. Apparently there was a meeting with all of the kids who were giving awards, but I was never invited to it. The kids were told there was some sentence to go up and say, and hand the teacher a certificate. I didn't know that, so day-of I get called first, and I really confusedly stood up.
They had said something about how these potted little trees at the front of the room were part of the award in the preface, so in the absolute silence of that room I meekly walked to one of the trees, picked it up - pot and all, and carried it onstage to the teacher at the podium. The stage was set up so that I had to go all the way to one side, up a short set of stairs, and back to the center. It was a long walk.
When I finally arrived at the podium, I put the tree down and a little dirt spilled out. The teacher standing at the podium finally mercifully broke the silence after another few seconds, hugged me and said something about her award being hand delivered, and I went back and sat down. Assumedly beet red.
"Shh Watch This"
Was walking down the hallway talking to my crush when suddenly I had to fart.
For some stupid reason, my 10 year old self thought it would be a good idea to interrupt her, stand in front of her, say "Shhhh, watch this" and fart.
Except it wasn't a fart. That's right. I interrupted my crush, got her attention, and then pooped my pants right in front of her, and then ran off in embarrassment and shame.
When i was in 6th grade, I won the class spelling bee. I knew it wasn't a big deal because I knew no one cares how good of a speller anyone is. But I was a poor student overall and I had a subdued pride that I had won. I was excited that I would get to go on to the school-wide spelling bee with an opportunity to showcase before the whole school that I was good at something
My second word was 'plaid'. When it was given to me, it just sounded like a nonsense syllable. I just shrugged and figured it was probably the past-tense of 'plod' and rattled off my assumed spelling without thinking
It took a split-second. I was standing there before a catholic school assembly, half of whose students were wearing plaid jumpers. The meaning of the word clicked the very moment I had repeated the word, and the scope and ridiculousness of my error crashed into me instantaneously. My eyes went wide as dinner-plates, and I positively screamed in incredulous, self-loathing outrage. It was like this:
"Your word is 'plaid"
"Plad, P-L-A-D, pladNOOOOOO"
Then I kind of dramatically half-crumbled, writhing around while still standing, kind of a knees-bent, hunched-over posture, and tearing at my hair with both fists. I slunk off to the sides, the first person eliminated, and struggled to hold back tears, still showcased before the entire school as I was
My sister still gives me shit about it when we're having a jokey disagreement about anything as a go-to argument-finisher, "F*ck you, spell 'plaid' whydon'tcha"
One time in 8th grade PreAlgebra, my favorite teacher was talking about triangles. She said,
"You have to square the legs. Michael! What did I just say??"
Michael who is a perpetually sleepy soul, always half-listening replies:
"Uhmh. I dunno. Something about spreading the legs?"
There were no survivors.
Oh Sweet Jesus!
I got bitten on my arm by a brown recluse while I was sleeping. Woke up with what looked like an infected ingrown hair that quickly became a gaping hole of rotting black flesh. At the worst of it, you could see a small, half-centimeter spot of my bone.
Whatever, that's just background details for context.
So here I am with my parents standing in line at Wal-mart with a big white bandage around my arm hiding the gore underneath. I'm out of the woods and on the mend, but it's still hideous to see. A lady is standing behind us in line and spots my bandage. For some reason, she wants to know what happened. I give her a smile and say I got bit by a spider. She made a "yeesh" face and said she hoped it got better soon.
Me, with a shit eating grin: "wanna see it??"
Her: "Oh, uh, no that's fine. You should keep it-OH SWEET JESUS!!"
I didn't wait for her answer and just whipped it out. The lady was so grossed out by my disgusting rotting spider bite that she ended up vomiting in the aisle. She got it on my shoes, some of the random knickknacks they keep on shelving at check out, and all over the floor. Then, I, being weak in the stomach in those days, threw up, too. It was the smell that got me.
It was awful.
Today, I know that all happened because 12yo me was a trouble maker and brought it upon herself. It's hilarious now remembering this 40 or 50ish year old lady yelling "OH SWEET JESUS!"
Self Cleaning Toilet
I was 7 years old, on a stay cation with my family in Cornwall, England. It was a beautiful summers day. My brother and I were desperate for the bathroom, after walking around for what seemed like like forever we found a toilet block which you had to pay 20 pence to enter.
There was a line of people as this was the only bathroom around the nearby area. My brother goes in and does his business and then holds the door for me on the way out. I went in and sat down on the toilet, but this was far from a moment of relief...
The lights flickered frantically, the toilet (which I was sat on) started to move into the wall, cleaning products sprayed vigorously throughout the whole room, jetting out from the walls. In my panicked state, bare arse in the floor, I began screaming. I finally got out of the bathroom drenched from head to toe, looked distraught at all of the other people that had been lining up outside.
Everyone found this hilarious except for me. This was my 'Nam, you weren't there man... You weren't there.
I really wish my brother didn't hold the door as these toilets were self cleaning, which we clearly found out.
Enough To Mummify A Komodo Dragon
In 5th grade, I walked into Mrs. Buffalo's social studies class from the bathroom with toilet paper pinched inthe back of abercromie jeans, unbeknownst to me. Before I had a chance to sit down, my friend pulled out enough toilet paper to mummify a komodo dragon while the class roared.
As I type this now, I'm surprised I wasn't mocked for that beyond that moment. Probably because some other kid farted soon after. Still my go-to "most embarrassing" moment during drinking games.
Freshman year of college I was sitting in the stands to watch a soccer game at my university. A cute girl from my dorm walks up the stairs with her parents and looks over at me and smiles and says "hey!" and starts walking over with her arms out like she wants to hug. I was kind of surprised because I didn't know her that well, but I stood up and said hi and hugged her.
When we make physical contact she kind of stutters and says "oh, uh, hey," and then lets go of me and hugs the girl who was sitting next to me. Turns out she was going to hug her roommate, who I was sitting next to, and I intercepted it. It was about 100x more embarrassing than waving back at someone not waving to you, but I crack up every time I think about it now!
There's something seeing a person litter that drives me up the wall. I remember being a kid and being explicitly told to hold on to my trash and not just throw it in the street. As a kid, I distinctly remember being made fun of for not just throwing the bag of chips I'd just eaten or an empty soda bottle into the gutter.
I can't imagine doing that. Why?! We truly treat this planet as if we have somewhere else to go.
After Redditor pnrddt asked the online community, "What small action immediately makes you dislike a stranger?" people shared their observations.
"Playing music..."<p>Playing music or having a 'private' conversation via speaker phone in a public place.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginci58?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">LLCoolBrap</a></p>
"When they exhibit..."<p><strong></strong>When they exhibit a personality trait that I also have, and don't like about myself. Every time I find myself being dismissive or judgemental of somebody, it's just my own insecurity.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginn0g5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginn0g5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">iotangle42</a></p>
"When I'm talking..."<p>When I'm talking and they are not listening. Like they are not even trying to pretend that they are listening.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gincjto?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">eat-the-rich-07</a></p>
"Because one of these days..."<p>A person can treat me like a princess but as soon as I see them mistreating either animals or people, I am out of there. Because one of these days, you'll be on that receiving end.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginpr97?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">starlightradio</a></p>
"It just screams..."<p>Telling people to smile. It just screams condescending and a lack of emotional intelligence.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginovsj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginovsj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">3FoolsinaTrenchcoat</a></p>
"When I hear that..."<p>Grown ups using "baby talk" to try to get what they want. I'm not talking about when people goo-goo at babies, but when they use a silly whiney voice to try to persuade people or make people do them a favour.</p><p>"Aww, pwease hewp me wiv dis wittle pwoject."</p><p>When I hear that I instantly lose respect for that person, be it a stranger or someone I know.</p><p>Pet peeve.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginbwb4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">handsahwill</a></p>
"Okay, we get it..."<p>One-upping people. "Yeah, that's pretty good, but one time I..." Okay, we get it, your life is more amazing than everyone else's.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginhrkd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">well-uh-yeah</a></p>
"When out driving..."<p><strong></strong><strong></strong>When out driving, someone who pulls out in front of you, then proceeds to go 5-10+ mph under the speed limit.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gingjuj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gingjuj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">FuzzMcBeefy84</a></p>
"If you don't..."<p>Talking negatively about anyone who's just trying to have a good time in a fun setting. If you don't have nice to say shut the hell up.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gio4vf5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">intergLACTIC</a></p>
"When people..."<p>When people put other people down to try and make themselves look better. "Oh I'm just playing around with them we're friends." I don't care quit being an @ss you know what you're doing and you should be able to tell you're making them feel bad.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gio9p3c?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">inf303</a></p>
"If it's into a drain..."<p>Spitting on the pavement.</p><p>If it's into a drain, that's fair enough, sometimes you get phlegm and you need to get rid of it. Going for a drain shows you're at least considerate of other, imo. But on the floor where anyone can step in it (or if you're in a wheelchair, get it all over your hands from pushing the wheels) is just gross.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginojq3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ghostmadlittlemiss</a></p>
When you're in the market for a slew of very specific facts that all fall under the same general theme, the internet really delivers.
Forget streamlined public health capabilities and revolutionized human communication, the true beauty of the internet is all the random, barely useful information you can find when a bunch odd people decide to assemble and swap info.
Homemade Tarantula<p>"Dental student here. Black hairy tongue is a common condition and it's exactly what it sounds like." </p><p>"It's just caused by buildup of dead skin that becomes hair like because of tobacco use or antibiotic use. Usually combined with lack of frictional forces from brushing"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu9tdq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Alarm-Potential</a></p>
Load Em Up<p>"When a patient gets a kidney transplant, they usually leave the old 2 behind unless there's a significant problem with them."</p><p>"The extra kidney is just tucked in the peritoneum leaving the patient with 3 kidneys."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu6qjd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">MedicalJargon-itis</a></p>
Come On Mutations!<p>"Every single melanocyte on your skin (you know, the ones that give your hairs color, and your skin its skin color) is connected to your sympathetic nervous system via modified synapses."</p><p>"No-one knows why they're connected that way - but we do know that under stress, those nerves nuke the pool of stem cells that create hair pigment, which is why it makes you go grey."</p><p>"A few mutations and you could theoretically be able to control them and change color like a chameleon."</p><p>"So in many ways, we're basically walking cuttlefish."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuyo29?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">PavlovaPalava</a></p>
Play the Long Game, People<p>"Humans can outpace any animal on the planet."</p><p>"No, we're not the fastest, but if we were chasing the fastest animal (cheetah) we would catch it and be able to keep going."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gisujdr?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Bout3Fidy</a></p>
Little Helpful Critters<p>"There are little microscopic organisms living in your eyebrows, eating away at the dead skin."</p><p>"Don't freak out, they are very helpful and completely harmless, just a little gross"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giud33u?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Vid-Me-BossCheesburg</a></p>
Thankfully That Filter is a Pretty Good One<p>"Saliva is filtered blood. Your tears are too. And if you're too stressed out you can cry blood."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gitshe5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">mylifeisathrowaway10</a></p>
Imagine It All in a Bottle<p>"I know that the average human churns out between 1 and 2 liters of saliva every day.... oh and we have parasites who are embedded in our hair follicles, and they eat away at our skin, thus causing Dandruff :,)"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gisrxcc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Throwawayyy123451</a></p>
So Hot<p>"Humans give off so much body heat that in 30 min we can boil a gallon of water" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu1ngt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Financial-Ad-6050</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu1ngt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Rookie numbers" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuvqqt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">nopenothappening</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Pshh I can get a gallon of water boiling in like 10 minutes tops" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuhji3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ridiculouslygay</a></p>
Oh Dear<p>"Old ladies often have prolapse of their pelvic organs. This means their vaginal walls got so weak that it can no longer support their bladder or uterus."</p><p> -Nurse practitioner"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gitopxb?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">vespertinas</a></p>
Working in a doctor's office means helping people when they're at their lowest. Sometimes, that leads to wonderful moments when the patient is thankful for all the advice and care you provided. Other times, it means taking something out of someone's bum.
Turns out, that second one happens a lot more than you might think.
For Fashion And Protection<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDMwOC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY1MjkwNTU2OX0.6D-LIQ26JXH0-7OtPpG93HOtt41wAv62bGHMVvuAYpk/img.gif?width=980" id="7ff06" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="6109fb5baf04f17deade8b58695881d1" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />wound up season 3 GIFGiphy<p>I had a patient come in with lacerations to her fingers. Her blender got clogged and she stuck her hand inside to clear it. She cleared it and the blender resumed....um blending. Luckily, she had long acrylic nails. This helped lessen the impact.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitz5l4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">Bornagainchola</a></p>
I'd Rather Go To Sleep<p>Guy came in after being concerned the bed sheet had stuck to his lower leg. Turns out hed been using a petrol mower the evening before and it had exploded. Full thickness burn to his calf. No pain. He wanted to go home to feed his cows instead of being transferred to burns and plastics. Man it looked like white leather.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitkqf9?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">DamaskRoses</a></p>
Why Play Typical Catch?<p>Guy was camping with his frat buddies and they were firing air rifles at each other with a baseball glove on.</p><p>The pellet was lodged well into his hand. Like, how did you think this was going to end?</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitq7lt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">Milesofstyle</a></p>
Close Eyes Off From The World<p>I was in the ER as a patient next to a guy who was brought in via ambulance because he super glued his eye lids shut.</p><p>He was high as a kite, but so was I from the pain meds I'd been given for my own injury. Whatever meds I was given made me think everything was hilarious. I got yelled at by the nurses for laughing hysterically in the next room. He was being a pain in the a--, ER was on diversion already, and they were not amused.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/githxnc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">brubarbal</a></p>
That's Why It's Called A "Dog" Toy<p>A few stand out. Person somehow swallowed a spiked dog toy.</p><p>Someone tried to reverse his circumcision by cutting more of his d-ck off with a pair of scissors.</p><p>About every object known to man up the bum. 🎵 if you like it then you shoulda put a string on it." 🎵</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitnt24?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">bsn2fnp1</a></p>
Yeah, But, How?<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDMxMi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0MjAyNTM0OX0.Esaobyl7Yq7QltSxli0ZwjggE7j8A4gu0uNRnn1ZwUc/img.gif?width=980" id="95a28" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="f4eb7f0131c0d79db2de93fd2bbdc0af" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />homer simpson GIFGiphy<p>I've seen an internal vaginal laceration from someone climbing a fence while trying to see something happening down the street.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/giss2id?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">midturbinate</a></p>
Again With The Butt...<p>ER Nurse here</p><p>-We had a girl come in and who knows what she was doing but she had one of the thin glow sticks in her bladder, maybe some fun finger/glow play during a concert? I don't know but pretty wild.</p><ul><li>Also I had a Spanish speaking only gentleman explain why a shoe polish bottle was in his bum, we had to use a video interpreter due to the language barrier but it's was pretty wild to hear the interpreter say "I have a bottle of polish in my anus" after expecting him to just explain why he had belly pain. We also proceeded to print out multiple pictures of common types of shoe polish he used to ask him if it was "this one or that one". It was hilarious when he identified what one it was based on the picture, he had to go to the OR</li></ul><div><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitqmlm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">AirFryersRule</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitqmlm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"></a></div>
Sounds Like A College Guy Thing To Do<p>Had a university student who ignited a firework in his anus while drunk for the amusement of his buddies. It exploded, causing full thickness burns of his rectum, resulting in him needing a colostomy</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/giss6l1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">ArcofRiolan</a></p>
Wow...<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDI4OC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzMDMyMzMyMn0.b42VhIpJrAsaFR19Cf55ZVkWnby5yTIrMhI73HVAImk/img.gif?width=980" id="3ccdf" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="50847094a4e17c16febbb35d2146f14f" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />scared homer simpson GIFGiphy<p>Operating theatre - this woman came in with a frozen chicken stuck inside her lady parts. Apparently she had a habit of buying them, inserting them and then pulling them out, as she really had a thing for going through childbirth, but on this occasion, she hadn't allowed time for it to defrost properly /adequately.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Mike_OxonFaier/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Mike_OxonFaier</a></p><p><em>Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter <a href="https://mailchi.mp/knowable/knowable-newsletter-in-content" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">here</a>. </em></p>
I love movies. The cinema has long been a savior of mine and has given me some of my greatest inspirations. But being an avid film watcher has also made me quite the critic. I can always tell when a movie is worth the money to see in theaters or wait until it's on basic cable with commercials. The signs of mediocrity abound, and sometimes they aren't that difficult to spot.Redditor u/fjv08kl wanted to know what is obvious about mediocre cinema by asking.... What are some subtle 'red flags' that tell you a movie is not worth watching?