People Share Old But Brutal Insults That Are Past Due For A Comeback

People Share Old But Brutal Insults That Are Past Due For A Comeback

[rebelmouse-image 18348674 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Not that it's the kindest thing to do but, a little insult or clapback is sometimes necessary in situations. We gotta vent our emotions, and better with a few choice (not necessarily malicious) words than fisticuffs. And it's always best to go with a classic. Even insults become vintage and most never lose their brilliance.

Redditor __PMUrClassySexyPics_wants to know _What old insults need to make a comeback? Goes to show, you can't beat the classics and there are a few great unknowns I'm writing down.

WELL CRAP!

You look like 10 pounds of s* in a five pound sack.

OLDIE BUT A GOODIE.

[rebelmouse-image 18345754 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

When I was in 7th grade we got a new student who had been homeschooled his whole life. One time I said something to him, can't remember what, and he called me a "dunderhead"

GRANDMA YOU SO CRAZY! LOL

[rebelmouse-image 18356073 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My grandmother once told me to take a flying f*at a rolling donut when I beat her at rummy once. So, there's that.

I BLAME THE PARENTS.

[rebelmouse-image 18356074 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Calling annoying kids 'rapscallions.'

AH... THE SHAKESPEAREAN INSULTS.

[rebelmouse-image 18356076 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My grandmother called a woman a shrew a few weeks back.

THE BARD DOES IT BEST.

[rebelmouse-image 18977300 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"I do desire we may be better strangers" Shakespeare.

As there were a few " yer mama" comments in the thread I thought I would add this exchange from Titus.

Demetrius: "Villain, what hast thou done?"

Aaron: "That which thou canst not undo."

Chiron: "Thou hast undone our mother."

Aaron: "Villain, I have done thy mother."

THE TRUTH IS BEST.

[rebelmouse-image 18979341 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"Don't look now. I think there's one too many in this room and I think it's you." - Groucho Marx.

WALK ON FRIEND. WALK ON.

[rebelmouse-image 18979342 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception!"

DIRTY, ROTTEN...

[rebelmouse-image 18979343 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Scoundrel? I like the sound of that.

I DON'T KNOW IT BUT I LIKE IT!

[rebelmouse-image 18360911 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

One of the surgeons I work with called his patient "A real Turd Ferguson" the other day. I almost fell out of my chair.

BUGS DOES IT BEST!

[rebelmouse-image 18979344 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

What a maroon!

LET'S MAKE A LIST!

[rebelmouse-image 18349245 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

all bark and no bite

all booster, no payload

all crown, no filling

all foam, no beer

all ham, no let

all hammer, no nail

all icing, no cake

all lime and salt, no tequila

all mouth and no trousers

all shot, no powder

all sizzle and no steak

all talk and no action

all wax and no wick

all motion and no meat

all show, no go

SOMETIMES DISGUISING YOUR THOUGHTS SUBTLELY IS KEY.

[rebelmouse-image 18979345 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I quite like using harpy in place of "witch," for a particularly nasty one.

DAMN. TELL ME HOW YOU REALLY FEEL.

[rebelmouse-image 18979346 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"You look like someone poured you into your clothes and forgot to say 'when'"

I don't know how old-timey it is necessarily, but I've always liked it.

A PLAGUE ON BOTH YOUR HOUSES.

[rebelmouse-image 18979347 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

In Dutch, it's still fairly common to insult people by wishing diseases on them. Stuff like "may your mother get cancer and you die of syphilis!" type thing.

I feel like this could really work in English beyond just "a pox on you" or some such.

WOOF... I FEEL THAT SHADE!

[rebelmouse-image 18360757 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"I hope you live a long and happy life; so you can enjoy your grandchild's short and miserable life."

OH OSCAR... BRILL!

[rebelmouse-image 18979351 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Literature is full of great ones like you deistical prater, you'd make a lovely corpse, you shell of a man... Also any of Oscar Wilde's snark.

YASSS GEORGE JEFFERSON!

[rebelmouse-image 18979352 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Jive turkey! It just rolls off the tongue. I feel so smooth after saying it.

ACTION AND NOT WORDS.

[rebelmouse-image 18979353 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Biting your thumb at people.

Breakfast of Champions

[rebelmouse-image 18979354 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"Oatmeal north of the eyebrows."

OH HELL NO... BACK UP!!

[rebelmouse-image 18979355 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Best comeback is a comeback that starts with

"Well first of all, brush your teeth.."

Then proceed with comeback.

People Break Down What Makes Someone Terrible In Bed
Photo by Parabol on Unsplash

"What makes someone bad in bed?"

WHERE TO BEGIN?!

The list is endless.

Half the time all it takes to be better is a little effort.

RedditorMidoriSpicewanted to hear about the lack of skills some people really need to acquire when it comes to sexy time. They asked:

"What makes someone bad in bed?"
Keep reading...Show less

Love is so elusive these days isn't it?

Who knows what anyone is looking for in the relationship department anymore.

It's all too exhausting.

But people we keep trying.

RedditorProblemNice5257wanted to hear why so many people are still on the hunt for that perfect one. They asked:

"Why are you single right now?"
Keep reading...Show less
People Imagine The First Thing They'd Do If They Get To Heaven
Photo by Ben Vaughn on Unsplash

There is no bigger mystery than what happens to us after we die.

But even those who don't practice an organized religion tend to believe that there is a Heaven, a happy joyful place where our souls will remain for eternity.

No two people share the same idea of what heaven would be like, but everyone who believes in it probably has an idea of the first thing they'd do after entering the pearly gates.

Redditor WeDidItGuyz was curious to hear what would be top on everyone's list upon entering the afterlife, leading them to ask:

"If heaven exists, what’s the first thing you’d do?"
Keep reading...Show less

"Fun facts" generally refers to a tidbit of information about a specific topic which the general public might not have otherwise known about.

But the first word in that term can be misleading.

Indeed, some "fun facts" reveal information that isn't remotely "fun" in the slightes.

Redditor Alternative_kachocho was curious to hear some "fun facts" which were anything but fun, leading them to ask:

What's a 'fun fact' that isn’t fun at all?"
Keep reading...Show less