JOIN
OUR EMAIL LIST!
Jose Luis Pelaez Inc/Getty Images

It's a challenge to punish your children in a way that matters. Something that might matter a immensely to them one day, perhaps their favorite show or their favorite toy, can be easily tossed aside the next day. This means your grand consequence is essentially worthless. As a parent, you need to know what works and what doesn't...but sometimes, parents go in weird directions, as evidenced by the stories below.


Reddit user, u/Bamboozled_Bear, wanted to know what was so weird about your time-outs when they asked:

What's the oddest punishment your parent(s) have given you for misbehaving/breaking rules growing up?

"I Am A Guy."

Giphy

My dad made me go out in a dress one time. I am a guy.

I was staying with him for a week, and skipped school one day. He came home to get something and found me watching TV and I said I was sick and couldn't go. He goes back to work. Problem was, this was a Friday and there was a party.

My dad and my step-mom come home and start making dinner. I get better and afterwards say I'm going out. Obviously this was met with skepticism.

My friends showed up in the midst of this. I argue my position passionately. At a certain point, my friends were dying laughing, and my dad switched from trying to get me to admit I lied, to just seeing how far I'd go to prove I hadn't. He even got my friends to tell him where we were going, and just kept saying he couldn't believe how "improbable" the whole thing was. He even told me I could go if I just admitted I lied about being sick. But, I was dug in.

I told him he could pick what I wore in order to prove I wasn't lying (my dad has notoriously terrible taste and this was way before "norm-core").

My dad picked a dress made from the back pockets of jeans. Like an entire dress made of denim back pockets. It was f-cking absurd and extremely uncomfortable. A massive jean dress made of exclusively seams. It didn't breathe, it barely moved, it chaffed. I didn't give a sh-t about wearing a dress, but this was torture.

Ya so I wore that to a party.

iph0ne

Just Nothing. Nothing.

My dad once made my sister and I watch a freshly painted wall dry

Forever_Man

Let The Punishment Fit The Crime?

My mother told me I wasn't allowed to talk for the rest of the day, because I licked my arm pit in front of one of my sister's cute friends.

mickerframe

Halting That Perfect Smile

They cancelled my braces. I was with a friend who got caught stealing, after denying any involvement for hours my parents refused to believe me and threatened to hurt my friend (even went to her house) I eventually lied and said I was involved and they cancelled my braces.

Still have crooked teeth to this day, and my parents think I'm a petty thief.

reddituser2907

You're Your Own Worst Enemy

The weirdest punishment my mother came up with was making me write a two page essay about why I had broken a rule, then write it again and again until she got home from work.

The weirdest punishment my father came up with was making me put away all my stuff instead of going to see a movie.

But that wasn't sh-t. I was a weird kid with a guilt complex deep as a trench. I'd punish myself sometimes for random things that my parents didn't feel really called for punishment. Sometimes it was simple sh-t like standing in a corner unprompted. One time I coated my tongue in pepper because I gave my mother trouble eating dinner.

But the grand prize winner was probably when, at the age of 7, I made myself watch the movie ALIEN alone in the dark. I don't even remember what I'd done to conclude I needed this, but I felt that the only answer was to scare the sh-t out of myself.

mxmnull

You Lose It All

When I was 15 I got my entire bedroom taken away for 5 months because I missed the bus.. the only thing i had in my room was a mattress and a pillow, no sheet or anything just a pillow

kroemerr

525,600 Minutes

14 years old. Friend used me as an alibi for when she got hammered, without me knowing. This ended up not saving her ass, but handing me mine. Instead of saying 'were you with her when she was drinking?' they took the tack of 'you were there too, so you must have been drinking'— which is wrong, I wasn't there, she just wanted to alibi herself out of trouble.

Parents refused to listen to me and grounded me for a year. I did the year (what option did I have?) and after that, refused to tell them anything ever again. I had told the truth and they didn't believe me. I never recovered from the damage that did, and to this day I tell them next to nothing. I'm 46 years old.

Keeks73

Punishment In More Than One Language

I grew up bilingual in English and Hebrew. My parents aren't religiously Jewish and my mom is only part ethnically Jewish, but they both studied Hebrew in college and wanted me to grow up bilingual. Makes you smarter, apparently.

Anyways, when I was ten, I swore for the first time out of anger in front of my parents. This wasn't just normal swearing either; this was really, really bad. I had heard those words at school a few months before. They then calmly decided that for a week (this was during summer vacation so I didn't have to go to school), I would have to speak in nothing but Hebrew.

It didn't matter where we went. We went to the pharmacy, the grocery store, and other places we normally went during that week. To a cashier, to other kids at the playground, to my parents, and literally everyone else I could only speak Hebrew.

It was honestly torture. No one knew what I was saying. I wasn't allowed to write anything down either. I tried my best to gesture about what I was trying to say but that confused people even more. Other kids wouldn't play with me because they thought I was insane. I was so embarrassed and adults would just give my parents sad, sympathetic looks like "You poor people. Your daughter is crazy" or even asking if I was adopted and then asking how I was adjusting to the States.

Needless to say, I never swore in front of my parents again.

TaliKolean

Wait...Back In The Box?

Dad got real pissed once and dumped out a box of fruit loops. Made me sort them by color, count each, add them together, then vacuum up the crumbs after I put them back in the box.

lazylezzy

Being Forced To Do It Again In A Way You Hate

So I had to write "I won't lie and do my work." In cursive cause I didn't want to do a reading log in cursive. Honestly I hated that thing. Cursive sucks.

SpOwOky-Boi

Nothing That Harms Them, Just Sends A Message

My mother's go-to punishment, which I'm sure I will carry on when I become a parent, was cold water in the face. Just enough to shock you. I have vivid memories of each time she came at me with a cup of water (and I got it the most out of my siblings).

Once, my youngest brother was throwing a tantrum in the kitchen while she was washing dishes. Just turned around and shot him with the sprayer. Definitely not the strangest I've seen, but also more creative than time outs or spanking. Very effective as well.

yeahimawake

Just Stare At It

I could put the ketchup on the table but was only allowed to look at it. My crime? Asking my foodie dad if I could have ketchup on my steak, I was 7 and that's how I'd always had it when my mom cooked it.

Not to be out done, my mother grounded me from reading because I kept staying up late past my bedtime reading books.

llamacolypse

Hot Sauce Is Also An Interesting Variant

We would get mustard pasted on to our tongues if we swore or told lies.

Once we were driven to the local police station because neither of us would admit to tearing the wallpaper, my brother finally admitted it at the last minute. We were very young, I thought we were gonna get locked up.

NotNowSilentSinger

Punishment By Snuggle

Got grounded for punching my best friend in a fit of rage, my punishment was to get my pyjamas on right after dinner. This was peak summer and we always used to go round for each other after dinner. When door went I was forced to answer door in my pyjamas at 6 pm and explain why I wasn't allowed out. Worst thing was it was the boy I punched at door so was no hard feelings.

Rossco1874

Get In Reeeeeeeal Close

Standing nose to nose in the middle of the room with the sibling you were just fighting with....

GreenSalsa96

Threaten The Funko

This happened maybe a week ago:

I was arguing about something with my mom in my room, when all of a sudden during the arguement she walked up to one of my shelves, grabbed an arm full of my Funko Pop figurines, opened my window and threatened to throw them out if I didn't listen to her.

We have a lot of fun in this household.

novashinx

Erasing The Torture You've Given Yourself

Giphy

When I was like 8 my parents made me dig a 4 foot wide, 4 foot long and 4 foot deep hole in the backyard and then just fill it back in because I lied.

It sucked.

RegularElephant

The ULTIMATE Guilt Trip

While fighting over a beanbag chair, my brother pushed me and I fell on the fireplace. Busted the back of my head open. My father swooped me up and rushed me to get stitches.

I was 5, my brother was 10.

It wasn't until many years later that I found out how my mother dealt with my brother after my father and I left.

As the door closed behind my father, carrying me out the front door, my mother looked at my brother and said, "Well, you killed your sister."

chucklet-ts

Image by Clker-Free-Vector-Images from Pixabay

Have you ever been reading a book, watching a movie, or even sitting down for a fantastical cartoon and began to salivate when the characters dig into some doozy of a made up food?

You're not alone.

Food is apparently fertile ground for creativity. Authors, movie directors, and animators all can't help but put a little extra time and effort into the process of making characters' tasty delights mouthwatering even for audiences on the other side of the screen.

Read on for a perfect mixture of nostalgia and hunger.

AllWhammyNoMorals asked, "What's a fictional food you've always wanted to try?"

Some people were all about the magical foods eaten in the magical places. They couldn't help but wish they could bite into something with fantastical properties and unearthly deliciousness.

Nutritious

"Enchanted golden apple" -- DabbingIsSo2015

"The Minecraft eating sounds make me hungry" -- FishingHobo

"Gotta love that health regeneration" -- r2celjazz

"Pretty sure those are based off the golden apples that grant immortality. Norse mythology I think?" -- Raven_of_Blades

Take Your Pick

"Nearly any food from Charlie and the Chocolate factory" -- CrimsonFox100

"Came here to say snozzberries!" -- Utah_Writer

"Everlasting Gobstoppers #1, but also when they're free to roam near the chocolate river and the entire environment is edible." -- devo9er

Peak Efficiency

"Lembas" -- Roxwords

"The one that fills you with just a bite? My fat a** would be making sandwiches with two lembas breads and putting bacon, avocado and cheese inside. Then probably go for some dessert afterwards. No wonder why those elves are all skinny, eating just one measly bite of this stuff." -- sushister

Some people got stuck on the foods they saw in the cartoons they watched growing up. The vibrant colors, the artistic sounds, and the exaggerated movements all come together to form some good-looking fake grub.

The One and Only

"Krabby patty 🍔" -- Cat_xox

"And a kelp shake" -- titsclitsntennerbits

"As a kid I always pretended burgers from McDonalds were Krabby Patties, heck from time to time I still do for the nostalgia of it all. Many of my friends did the same thing." -- Thisissuchadragtodo

Cheeeeeeeeese

"The pizza from an extremely goofy movie. The stringy cheese just looked magical lol" -- ES_Verified

"The pizza in the old TMNT cartoon as well." -- gate_of_steiner85

"Only bested by the pizza from All Dogs Go to Heaven." -- Purdaddy

Get a Big Old Chunk

"Those giant turkey drumsticks in old cartoons that characters would tear huge chunks out of. Those things looked amazing, turkey drumsticks in real life suck and are annoying to eat."

-- Ozwaldo

Slurp, Slurp, Slurp

"Every bowl of ramen on any anime, ever." -- Cat_xox

"Studio Ghibli eggs and bacon" -- DrManhattan_DDM

"Honestly, any food in anime. I swear to god half the budget no matter what the studio goes into making the food look absolutely delicious." -- Viridun

Finally, some highlighted the things that aren't quite so far-fetched, but still far enough away that it's nothing we'll be eating anytime soon.

That tease can be enough to make your mouth water.

What's In It??

"Butter beer" -- Damn_Dog_Inappropes

"came here to say this. i was pretty disappointed with the universal studio version which was over the top sweet. it was more of a butterscotch root beer. i imagine butter beer to be something more like butter and beer, which wouldn't be crazy sweet, but would have a very deep rich flavor" -- crazyskiingsloth

Slice of the Future

"The microwave pizzas in back to the future two" -- biggiemick91

"I've been fascinated with those for years! They just look so good!" -- skoros

As Sweet As They Had

"The Turkish Delight from Lion Witch & Wardrobe. The real ones I had weren't bad but nothing special." -- spoon_shaped_spoon

"Came here to say this. I know it's a real thing, but I always imagined that it must have been amazing to betray your siblings over." -- la_yes

"You're used to freely available too sweet sweets. For a WW2 era schoolkid, it would have represented all the sweets for an entire year." -- ResponsibleLimeade



Here's hoping you made it through the list without going into kitchen for some snack you didn't actually need.

Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

Image by Sammy-Williams from Pixabay

When a movie rakes in a ton of cash at the box office, the studio that made it has only one thing on its mind: "How do we keep shaking this money tree?"

Unfortunately, that means they make sequels, sometimes sequels on sequels on sequels.

Keep reading... Show less

Oftentimes I like to do my best Ghostface impression and aggressively ask people what their favorite scary movies are. Because I personally have a lot! At the same time, I'm also terrified that at any point, I could end up getting my head punched off by Jason Vorhees (Part 8 of the series--best one IMO).

Keep reading... Show less
Image by Sammy-Williams from Pixabay

I hate hypocrites. They are the bane of my existence. All you have to do is stand behind your words. How hard is that? You said them. I especially get peeved when people bloviate on a topic and condemn and holler but then when it comes to them doing it... silence.

Redditor u/ErrForceOnes wanted to know about the moments people chose to curiously "pay no mind" by asking... What is a GIANT hypocrisy that no one seems to mind?
Keep reading... Show less