We all want to do good in the world. We try our best to live our lives by certain mantras and codes such as, "Pay it forward, do unto others, be the light you want to see in the others".... all truths yes, but, we have to be careful, some people will milk your soul bare by weaponizing that good spirit. Humans are flawed, and some are just empty narcissists that live their lives by taking advantage of others. And the kind hearted often reach breaking points, because can only be burned so many times. Help, but be careful. Shield yourself first. And always... ALWAYS.... get it in writing!!Redditor u/mofoxx wanted everyone to share about the times they realized they needed to peace out by asking.... What was your 'F*** it, done helping others' moment?
You're Stressedjimmy fallon no GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Giphy
When I dropped my rates significantly to help a struggling family with child care. Blended family needing to find childcare for their emotionally damaged children who had been hospitalized by mum's boyfriend.
Both parents worked and my wages where payed through a charity scheme.
It was hell. They where utterly useless as people let alone parents.
They took the crap and ended up basically doing nothing with the house or children and ended up owing me nearly 2K due to them committing benefit fraud and pocketing what they should have been passing on to me.
The final straw was when they asked me to babysit that night as they needed to 'go out on the lash, its been stressful' whilst telling me they couldn't afford food let alone pay me.
Never again will I fall for a sob story.
No Follow Through?
Was donating baby/toddler clothes to a mom in need through one of those Facebook donating pages. She didn't have a car, I did so I drove 30 minutes away to deliver the stuff all for free. Got in a bad accident less than 5 blocks from her house. So I texted her to see if she could come get what she was able to because my car was totaled. She wouldn't walk the 4 blocks then reported me to the group and got me kicked out for "not following through". I ended up with a fractured sternum, yeah Forget that crap, never again.
I'm a teacher. A parent of a former student contacted me in an emergency situation, couldn't afford to pay bills, and needed help. She was super helpful to me in my first year teaching, so I asked friends and family to help out and raised her about $2,000. Never again. She has contacted me every few weeks since then, always with a new reason why she needs more money (and when I offer food and clothing resources, she refuses it). It has placed me in such an awkward situation and I regret ever trying to help her out in the first place.
Won't you NOT be my Neighbor?mr rogers GIF Giphy
I have neighbors across the road who we extended ourselves to to help out because they had young kids and seemed to be struggling.
Well, they were really starting to take advantage to the point where we couldn't walk out of our house without them literally yelling for us because they needed a phone, a ladder, money, someone to drive them somewhere, diapers, our Wi-Fi password, our wood, etc. etc. This started happening everyday and multiple times a day. It became ridiculous and oppressive.
They have since pulled that crap with everyone else on our road, wearing out one generous person after the other. Once you realize people are merely moochers and are content to remain so, that's when you're done.
For the Kids
I had a coworker in tears once telling me she had nothing to feed her kids for dinner, no laundry soap to wash their clothes, etc etc. I fell for it, gave her money to buy the kids food and brought her some laundry stuff from home. The next day she shows up to work with two Redbulls and a breakfast sandwich from a drive thru coffee stand with her nails done. Never again.
Not me but my parents.
My cousin moved in with us for two years when I was a kid, she's 18 years older than me. She ended up being a drug addict that smoked in the house, stole money, couldn't hold down a job, and mercilessly picked on my sister and I until the day she got kicked out.
That was almost 30 years ago. To this day my parents refuse to let anyone move in because they "just need a place to stay until they're back on their feet."
The Rough Patch
Met a guy who had hit a rough patch. We had great chemistry and he made me laugh (ugh the bar was SO low). He gave me a sob story of why he was getting kicked out of his communal house and I offered to let him stay with me because I live alone and have my own place.
HUGE MISTAKE! He hadn't hit a rough patch, he was the rough patch. Barely paid for anything and would get wasted while I was at work and be a total screwball when I got home. Got fired from his job, ate all the food I'd buy and make excuses as to why he hadn't found another job yet.
The absolute kicker was when I went home for my Nonna's funeral, he treated it like a mini vacation in my place. Invited friends over, played music so loud the cops got called and when he was supposed to pick me up from the airport, he was wasted at someone's house at 8 am. Never felt better than the day I kicked him out. No more financial and emotional abuse. Finally felt like my place was mine again.
I've learned an expensive lesson. Don't help people that won't help themselves. When nothing is their fault, there's a serious issue. Run fast and far.
Getting Mowedgay lawn mower GIF Giphy
Had a newish neighbor ask if he could borrow our lawn mower.... sure.
Well more or less every week he would come and get it out of our garage, use it to cut his grass, put it away without cleaning it or adding gas. In the fall we "mentioned" it was a good time to get deals on a new mower. He never talked to us again.
get it in writing always.....
In freshman year of college, my friend of about two years got kicked out of his parents house. He said he needed somewhere to stay "for the night" till his parents cooled off.
I said you can stay a week if you want but more than that and you'll need to pay me rent (he made pretty good money, more than me even).
I was kind of hoping to find someone to split the bills with anyway.
A week rolls by and he hasn't even looked for another place. His parents aren't letting him come back.
I ask him if he's going to stay, he says "if it's alright with you" I say sure, just pay me half the cost of the apt every month. He said he can't (I know damn well he can).
I say "well then you gotta go"
He asked if he could stay another week. I said no. He got pissed at me for that. I then got pissed at him for getting pissed at me. I gave you a place to stay and you are mad at me??? Totally ended the friendship.
Never let anyone into your place unless you have a signed contract.
Bye SisSassy Beyonce GIF Giphy
When I rushed to another state about 2,000 miles away to help my sister because of a medical issue, and for whatever reason she decided to have her neighbor help her instead, without letting me know. It was 3 months ago and she is fine but still has not contacted me. That was the end for me.
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