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People Confess The Dumbest Thing Their Brain Has Done On Autopilot

People Confess The Dumbest Thing Their Brain Has Done On Autopilot

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People Confess The Most Obvious Things They Only Recently Realized

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People Break Down The Weirdest Facts They Know

Man explaining weird theory

People Share The Weirdest Facts They Know

People Who've Been Mistaken For Being Dumb Break Down How They Turned The Tables

People Who've Been Mistaken For Being Dumb Break Down How They Turned The Tables

Unbelievably Entitled People

Unbelievably Entitled People

People Break Down The Most Useless Facts They Know

People Break Down The Most Useless Facts They Know

People Share The Most Hilariously Inaccurate 'Fact' Someone Ever Told Them

Please. At least Google before you speak.

People Share The Most Hilariously Inaccurate 'Fact' Someone Ever Told Them
Photo by Braydon Anderson on Unsplash

The world is overrun with fun facts and fake news. At this point who knows what to believe. That is why we must always think before we speak and have ironclad proof that what we are saying is factual. I mean the basics are covered.... the Earth is flat, the sky is blue and Adele is an angel. Check.

But all the other sordid details being lobbed at us on the daily need to be vetted before they are spread. Otherwise we're just talking smack... no matter how entertaining it is or solid it sounds.

Redditor u/argues_with_quote wanted to know what "knowledge" that was really nonsense others have tried to sell to us all by asking.... What is the most hilariously inaccurate 'fact' someone has told you?

To Red Robin....

Giphy

Had a friend try to tell me and a group of friends that every single Red Robin was off an exit 3 from the highway. We tried to tell her that no, it was just a coincidence that she saw two like that or something. Then when asked "do you know how exits work?" she replied "yes, every time there's a Red Robin, they make it an exit 3". Wtf? Born_Slippee

Crystals....

Water is a crystal, not a liquid.

It was some guy posting a shower thought. I got into a long argument with him and it kept getting more and more ridiculous because he was genuinely convinced. I've never.. ever seen anything like it. It still haunts me to this day, because it's so preposterous it MUST be a troll move, yet everything suggests he was serious. I will never know...

Here if you're interested....

https://www.reddit.com/r/Showerthoughts/comments/e3h5jf/water_is_a_liquid_crystal_so_we_are_all_crystal/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=shareahmadove

The X Factor. 

  1. Neighbor told me he attended an international medical conference for work and he learned that women were "catching diabetes in their feet because of the sandals that they wear in the summer"
  2. Little sister's friend said that a contestant on a singing show like X Factor came second after the finale because the contestant who won stole his phone and turned it off so he wouldn't get his votes when people texted in. TeeRanbato

Sing out....

The band name "KISS" is an acronym for "Knights In Satan's Service."

"AC/DC" = "Anti-Christian Devil Children"

"Slayer" = "Satan Laughs As You Eternally Rot"

...all told to us without irony by a Sunday school teacher, circa 1987. Keefer1970

Fractions. 

This is a story that is too long to type in full but I once got into a disagreement with some random dude at an A&W because he thought that 1/4 (one quarter) was more than 1/3 (one third). His reasoning was that since 1/4 has a four and 1/3 has a three, and 4 is one unit higher than 3 then 1/4 is more than 1/3.

The worst part was that in order to prove him wrong I asked the cashier girl which weighed more, she didn't know. Then I asked the next person in line, that idiot said 1/4. Do you have any idea how infuriating it is to have a complete idiot think that he's smarter than you because everyone in the room is just as dumb as he is? ToxicMasculinity1981

The Confused.

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My ex argued that fossils weren't actually old and those creatures never existed, they were just stuck there to confuse us. DisneyDork1313

Lung Work. 

"smoking weed strengthens your lungs" no, no it does not. ibbity

Yeah, I can get on board with the 'weed smoke isn't as bad as cig smoke.'

But like... combusted plant matter coating your lungs is still combusted plant matter coating your lungs. argues_with_quotes

The West Cold....

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Someone once told me that it never snows in the state of Washington because 'its on the west coast.' Same person also told me that she doesn't believe in gravity because "if it was real, wouldn't the sun just suck up the moon?"

She was 24 when she said these things to me. Scamperillium

No Gatorade! 

That you can live off drinking sea water because Gatorade has sodium in it.

I was telling this dude about a guy who was stranded out at sea for awhile and survived by drinking rainwater and shark blood or some crap, and dude was like "why didn't he drink the sea water? Gatorade has sodium in it and it's fine. It's a myth that you can't drink sea water. Probably so they can keep charging people for drinking water." Tickle86

Palms Up! 

That masturbating will give you hairy palms. I had a teacher in high school tell us this and the number of guys and girls who checked their hands immediately was hilarious. I had to really slam on the brain filter to keep from doing it myself but you better believe I examined my hands thoroughly in the bathroom after class. DaFahQsay

Just Breathe...

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It's possible to breathe underwater.

She then tried to demonstrate and snorted a bunch of lake water up her nose. She was 14 at the time. psych_edelic_survey

 they were damn bears.....

A woman at a party I was attending over a decade ago insisted that the largest member of the rodent family is the... polar bear.

I looked at her in absolute disbelief and replied that they weren't rodents, they were damn bears.

She had a PhD, too... smh. pm1966

This almost feels like one of those crazy facts that you think theres no way is true but kind of is by a technicality. Like I could say palm trees are grass. They aren't actually grass, but they are monocots like grass and are more closely related to grasses than woody trees, so if you skip a couple steps you could try to pass it as a "fun fact." iamgladtohearit

No Shake for You! 

I was talking to a guy at the bar and he was telling me how soap is unnecessary for washing your hands. All you need is a combination of hot water and cold water. Not warm. But use both cold and hot.

I did not shake his hand. atlantis_airlines

This is quite scientifically sound. When you alternate between the temperatures rapidly, the dad microbe begins shouting about 'the thermostat' and 'he's not made of petri dishes you know" and all the young bacteria roll their eyes so hard they die. Like, Galileo discovered it, or something. my_4_cents

SMDH!! 

My roommate tried to convince me that there are Chimpanzee-people in the jungle because isolated tribes are getting it on with the monkeys. I tried to explain how species reproduce and quickly realized he thinks you can be with a horse and get a centaur. aBucketofChestnuts

S'mored.

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You can get black lung disease from overcooking the marshmallows for s'mores. USPSA-Addict

Being Egged. 

Goats lay eggs. A several minute argument followed, and I did not convince him he was wrong. I work in meat processing. Not that that's necessary to know that goats don't lay eggs, but it just made the argument all the more ridiculous. I'd literally seen goats born live countless times, and yet he argued.

Edit: I also worked at a caviar bar for a while, and many times had to hear from people who were horrified we were eating dolphin eggs. Beluga. I've heard that "mahi mahi is dolphin" more times than I can count. And from people who've eaten it even. onioning

Oh Boys....

An ex boyfriend once insisted that women can hold in their periods like we can hold our urine. He did not believe me, a woman, when I told him that was absolutely not the case. What. b0n3rjamz

I've had a similar conversation, although luckily I was able to convince him other wise. I told him that when you have a cut on your arm, it just bleeds and you can't control it. So you put a bandage on it. purpleplatapi

Perfect Potassium.

Giphy

The shape of the banana and the way it fits your hand so well are proof that god exists.

He stopped using that argument when one of our co-workers pointed out that a penis also fit hands pretty well too. I_throw_socks_at_cat

"Sally had told her so"

Not me but my mum. She was walking with a group of friends on a popular trail in the UK. She has quite an outspoken friend, let's call her Sally. The group saw a number of Chinese tourists taking pictures of the sheep along the trail. One of the group asked;

"I wonder why they are all taking pictures of sheep all the time."

To which Sally replies;

"It's because they don't have sheep in China!"

The group all believed Sally, and thought it was an amazing fact. My mum decided to regurgitate the fact one dinner time saying that "Sally had told her so."

I called bull and Googled it there and then.

Turns out China has the largest population of sheep in the entire world.

My mum has never lived that down. Alarmed_Brick

Hey Jude.

Giphy

When you go to Liverpool and start singing a Beatles song, everybody will join in like it's some Disney movie. The guy was dead serious. LOB90



inaccurate facts

People Who Witnessed A Teacher Break Down In Tears Share Their Experiences

Reddit user throwthrowwthrowwww asked: 'Students who've witnessed their teacher cry during class, what happened?'

Apple on a stack of textbooks
Element5 Digital/Unsplash

Teachers are not only educators, they're also inspiring leaders.

The most memorable teachers are those who genuinely encourage young students to do their best so they can be empowered to pursue their dreams.

However, we tend to revere them to such a degree, we forget that they're people too with real emotions.

Curious to hear from strangers who witnessed a vulnerable moment from someone they were inspired by at an early age, Redditor throwthrowwthrowwww asked:

"Students who've witnessed their teacher cry during class, what happened?"

There's no bigger heartbreak than people who are struggling with illnesses or know of someone facing medical challenges.

Ailing Teacher

"One of our music instructors 7th-12th grade. She had a long ongoing battle with stage three/four cancer. She always did her best to try to have fun during our classes, like it was an escape for her because she loved music so much. Over 85% of the entire high school joined choir because of her. Her chemo and radiation treatments left her exhausted some days, though, and she would occasionally break down. In 2012, when her condition worsened, she would have to take more days off because the cancer had become so debilitating."

"We continued to practice our songs while she was gone, and I swear we would sometimes spend an hour on one small section of a song, ripping every note apart, and repeating the same words over and over until we couldn't mess it up. One of the final days in class with her, I remember we were rehearsing for our upcoming state competition, and we sounded damn good. Mid-song, she stopped conducting, closed her eyes, folded her hands, and listened as we continued singing for her. The energy and sound was so profound throughout the room, I can't find the words to describe it."

"After the song finished, we stood in a long, complete silence before she opened her eyes with tears streaming down her face. She wasn't able to go to our state competition with us, but we ended up placing that year. It wasn't first like we were hoping, but it was the highest the school had ever placed. She later passed away that same year. She was one of the strongest women I had ever met in my life."

– Top-Box2372

Losing A Student

"My high school Spanish teacher also taught some homebound students with medical issues."

"One day the vice principal came into our class and told Ms J that one of her homebound students had passed away from his cancer. She couldn't hold back the tears."

– que_he_hecho

Wise Toddler

"I’m a teacher, I cried in front of my toddlers when I got a call from the hospital telling me it was time to make the call as to whether to pull my dads life support. One of my toddlers came up to me while I was crying, put her hand on my cheek and said 'it’s ok to feel sad, it’s ok to cry,' then gave me a hug. I love my job."

– Cheekygirl97

Students witnessed the following teachers get emotional.

Thoughtful Sixth-Graders

"The class surprised him on teacher appreciation day. Someone brought pop, snacks etc. He was surprised. 6th grade teacher."

– Stephlynn1234

Appreciation Day

"Had a philosophy course in uni during covid. So the class was held on zoom. It wasn't teacher appreciation day, but it was the second to last lecture of the term and we all really enjoyed this prof (and because of him most of the class became friends). So we organized an appreciation thing for him."

"We all started class without our cameras on, which was unusual and made him question (he got sad actually). So one girl said 'before we start, we just really wanted to do something for YOU because you've done so much for us. I hope this is okay.' He gave us a confused look, and before he could say anything in response we all turned our cameras on and held up signs saying 'thank you professor [name]' and our green screen backgrounds were of his face lol. He laughed so hard but started crying. Told us how he wished we could do this in person and that he genuinely cared about all of us."

"He had a lot of health issues, the most prominent one being MS. Whenever he didn't start class on time we all got worried, and there were a few times where he cancelled altogether because he fell or something. He also had a cat, and we asked to see him just enough times that his cat learned what time our class was at and would climb up to see us and stay the whole class. It was cute. During the breaks he would email a link to play chess since he lived far from his family and couldn't visit and wanted the company. We organized a Christmas movie day with him over the Christmas break and he loved it. He retired after the following year because of his health, and I still wonder what he's doing now and if he's doing okay. I've been in uni for 5 years now and he is the only prof I've actually spoken to consistently and genuinely liked."

– Burnt_Your_Toast

Sad Literature

"5th grade teacher reading Where the Red Fern Grows out loud to the class. He shed some tears. He did every year."

– SnoBunny1982

"Our teacher read that book to us in 5th grade also. But when it got to that part, she elected me to read it and she left the room. Luckily I had read it before and knew what was coming, but it was still rough."

– MIBariSax81

The Private Life Of An English Teacher

"I forgot his name, but he was one of my favored teachers in high school. He taught English."

"During class, he was called out to talk to some members of the school administration and a few proctors. It took several minutes. But he returned, taught as much of the class as he could, and then just walked over to his desk and started crying. Whimpering. He then left."

"He just found out his wife, who had also been a teacher, was having an affair with one of the female students. We didn't find out that specific fact until later on though."

– Typical_Samaritan

Some students, however, can force a teacher to realize they're in the wrong profession.

Bad Attitude

"Student that had behavior issues and a hard time maintaining emotional regulation threw his recorder (the instrument) at the music teacher and it snapped in half. He then threw his desk in her direction and walked out. This was 3rd grade, and all she had asked him to do was listen to the song we were learning. She quit the next week after almost 30 years of teaching."

– Last_Tuesdays_Beans

Bullying The Substitute

"Ms. Hanlon... Substitute teacher, I still think about her and hope she's doing well. She was posted as the teacher when the usual teachers were off sick. Absolutely zero respect was given to her and the class knew if we had Ms. Hanlon it was just an extended lunch, we could just mess around and act like animals for the whole lesson."

"She had physical conditions like a dent in her forehead and a gravvely voice which prevented her from being able to raise her voice to tell us to be quiet. So the kids would all do Hunchback of Notre Dame impressions, spitballs through straws and do the 'coughing game' where they would just cough through whatever she was trying to say."

"Even as a kid I felt kinda awful after we'd essentially broken her and she'd just come in not even say hello and pull open a book for the hour and sometimes cry into it. I weirdly still think about her randomly once or twice a month, I hope she moved on to way better things. School children really have no filter at all."

– PNCL

Absolutely Zero Respect

"Substitute teacher in Jr High must be among the world's worse jobs. 8th grade we had a sub that demanded and got no respect. Kids would throw stuff at her etc. She left the classroom crying then the vice principal, who was not to be messed with, came in and took over."

– woolash

Major Mockery

"I had a substitute teacher named Mr. Crane who looked exactly like Ichabod Crane from the old cartoon. Some kids in the class bullied him relentlessly for this and he just kind of broke down one day. Poor guy."

– backflip10019

In seventh grade, I witnessed a classmate talk back to our homeroom teacher and saying very inappropriate, bullish things to her in front of the whole class.

But that didn't make her cry.

What made her tear up was when another student defended her and yelled at the bullying student for being out of line.

teachers

People Divulge The Dumbest Reasons Their Friends Ever Ended Up On The News

man in black crew neck shirt
Amanna Avena on Unsplash

It can be a pleasant and exciting surprise to see a friend or family member show up on the evening news.

Particularly if it is a story showcasing their accomplishments or allowing them to let their voice be heard on an important issue.

Of course, showing up on the news isn't always a joyous occasion.

Indeed, some people tune in to find their friends and family on the news for reasons they might hope people will eventually forget down the line.

Redditor Miguenzo was eager to hear stories of a loved one making the evening news for less than brag-worthy stories, leading them to ask:

"What’s the dumbest reason somebody you know landed on the 6 o’clock news?"

15 Minutes, Or Four Seconds, Of Fame...

"Years back, there was a college scholarship scam going on here."

"These companies would go to high schools and do a presentation, and grift parents into paying a large sum for the company to help get a scholarship."

"My mom took one look at this and was like, 'this is a scam'."

"My uncle bought it hook, line and sinker and paid up."

"And received absolutely nothing."

"So he calls our news program and they do a feature with this company in their 'hall of shame.'"

"My uncle was absolutely THRILLED."

"'They interviewed me for 4 hours!'"

"'It's going to be huge!'"

"We all sit around the TV."

"It's February 2000."

"Boom, there's my uncle!"

"They do the lead-in..and then, there's my uncle saying..."

"'They said, uh, sue 'em'."

"My uncle is screaming."

"'What the Hell?! They were at my house for 4 hours!'"

"We still have it on VHS somewhere."

"My uncle's star moment over in seconds."- JKW1988

Episode 19 News GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy

Preserved For Posterity...

"My college roommate got stuck in an infant swing at a public park and firefighters had to use some type of Jaws of Life contraption to cut the swing down and cut her out of it."- Nocomt

Oops!

"I know a guy who was interviewed on camera up in the mountains where there was a forest fire."

"He had been up there fishing with his girlfriend."

"He was married."- Fezig

Close Call

"Dude was swimming laps in a lake after dinner (i.e., around sunset)."

"Predictably, he got bit by an alligator."

"I saw him on the news, shirtless in true Floridaman fashion, with a little bandage over each tooth mark."

"The bandages made a dotted line around his shoulder and chest in the shape of an alligator's mouth, like he was in a cartoon or something."- BigRedRobotNinja

Tiere Bis Unters Dach Swimming GIF by SWR KindernetzGiphy

Unpaid Extra

"There was a park nearby that had no drainage and was bowl shaped."

"So if it rained hard, this baseball park/ football field turned into a mini lake."

"It rained a lot one day and the news did a story just showing how much it rained, and in the background behind the news-woman, from out of frame you see my friend rowing past her in a kayak."- hook_killed_pan

Right Place At The Right Time?

"A fight broke out at a HS football game."

"Turned into a huge brouhaha.'

"They intervened this dumba** friend of mine on the local news, the only bit that made it into the broadcast was him saying 'For the first time in my life I was happy to see cops!'"- KneeDragr

Awww...

"Marrying their pet goldfish in an underwater ceremony, complete with a wedding gown and guests in scuba gear."- Candies-For-You

Illustration Swimming GIF by Ordinary NadeeGiphy

Strike!

'A childhood friend’s dad embezzled money from the local Little League team."- Key-Zebra-4125

How Did He Even Make It To The Freezer?

"An ex boyfriend of my best friend’s sister ended up on the news for breaking into a Checkers through the drive through window and locking himself in the freezer until the cops arrived and arrested him."- pineapple3712·

Ice Cream Snack GIF by My/Mochi Ice CreamGiphy

Setting An Example...

"I got filmed and aired sticking a swab up my nose at drive thru covid testing."

"I had just declined to be interviewed at my car because I was afraid of getting someone sick."

"Test was negative, and my sister got a new pic for my contact profile on her phone."- idiotsavant419

Criminals Don't Ususally Wait In The Check Out Line...

"My friend was going to target with his mom to buy a tv."

"They stopped at Starbucks in the store."

"When the worker asked what the wanted he said “'he money in the register see' like an old timey gangster, then laughed ordered and payed for their coffee and went into target."

"While they were pushing their cart with a tv in it to the check out line the swat team surrounded them and arrested him for armed robbery.. was on the news."

"Got charged and everything."

"The first hearing the barista could not point him out and the judge threw out the case."- MACHOmanJITSU

Returning To The Scene Of The Crime...

"A guy from my high school stole Michael Jackson's glove from the Motown Museum in Detroit MI in early 90s."

"He returned it."

"I knew it had to be him, and yep, it was."

"I remembered him because he dressed like Michael Jackson every single day of school for years."

"He did it really well, too."

"He also didn't talk much."

"So, I was surprised to see him talking to a TV reporter about it."

"I hope he's doing well."- ATK80k

Animated GIFGiphy

Some people crave their 15 minutes of fame and embrace it however it may come.

Others only hope that no one they knew happened to be watching their local news that night...

Even though they know deep down that all their friends have it on their DVR and are never planning to erase it...


evening news

Men Break Down The Weirdest Things Someone's Ever Said To Them After Sex

white pillows and bed comforter
Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash

People say the darndest things after -- and sometimes during -- lovemaking.

Maybe it's the euphoria.

Maybe it's the adrenaline.

Maybe it's the tequila.

It's always good to have a kind-hearted joke on hand or a generic compliment.

Or maybe just grab your belongings and skedaddle.

Redditor ella-es-julia wanted to hear about the craziest pillow talk stories, so they asked:

"Men of Reddit: What's the weirdest thing a girl said to you after sex?"

The weirdest I ever got was... "What city am I in again?"

Geography matters.

Morbid Much?

In Bed Home GIFGiphy

"Met girl, went on date, brought girl home, had the sex, finished the sex, laying there she says 'What would you do if I died right now?' and demanded an actual answer."

Vixxay

Meow

"Not to me, but as she walked over to the bathroom after the deed, she said 'I just did your owner' to my cat. Sexiest thing that ever happened to me."

shlanky369

"My Fiancé and I were about to start going at it when the cat appeared from under the bed and stared at me. I went, 'Babe the cat is here. I don't like how he's staring at my boobs."

"Fiancé grabbed the cat and yeeted him into the hallway with the phrase, 'Get out you weird pervert.'"

"The cat proceeded to (without his claws) smack the door over and over again while screaming for a few minutes straight. Pervert."

Trumpet6789

POP!

"'I need you to take me to the hospital. Something is now bleeding and hurts.'"

"Turns out her ovarian cyst popped. We're still together with the running joke of sex so good it put her in the ER."

DasBatt

"Ah ah ah, 2 hemorrhagic cysts ruptured, I was bleeding internally, but only a little bit. I'm still impressed by how quickly you went from a naked sex stupor to being ready and carrying me to the car. Good times."

"In the ER when they asked me what happened all I could do was shout 'we were f**kin!' through my tears. That memory still makes me laugh."

Straystar-626

Damn it's Good

"We were going at it for some time then her face went instantly from 'damn it's good' to full-on crying. I stop, ask her what's wrong and she tells me 'I can't cheat on my boyfriend, it is wrong.'"

"So this is when I learned that the girl that I met on a dating website and that I started seeing 3 weeks before and that she told me she was single had a boyfriend for over 5 years. Got her to talk more, and she told me she was on the dating website to see if there were guys better than her boyfriend so she could end up with someone better."

"This was like 20 years ago, a coworker I have right now knows her (his girlfriend is like a distant relative of hers) and I learned she had 5 different boyfriends since then, cheated on all of them except the last one (for now). She was also a cam model in secret, one of the boyfriends was a high-paying customer."

draftstone

A Binding Contract

"'Pleasure doing sex business with ya.' We then shook hands."

"Still together 5 years later!"

Tatarstan

It's nice when people who have great sex make great partners.

And it all starts with a handshake.

Sleep on It

“'I don’t usually say this but, yeah, you can stay.'"

lennyukdeejay

"Did you high-five after that? Seems like that statement called for it."

EvilNinjaX24

"This is the best one."

TomKhatacourtmayfind

Tiny Dancer

"Not really weird but I slept with this girl while backpacking Asia, she was also a backpacker. After a bit of chillin'/talking, I got up to get dressed, she looked at my flaccid manhood and said 'You're quite shy when you're not excited.' I thought it was hilarious."

fleetwoodsackk

"That's a much better way to put it. My wife, when we were just dating and had moved in together and eventually saw it flaccid just said 'Aww, it's so little.' Thanks, hun, exactly what every guy wants to hear."

striker180

Fine!

"She said 'If I get pregnant I'm keeping it.' I was dumbfounded and when I didn't respond quickly enough she got really agitated like I had hurt her feelings and yelled 'Fine! You don't have to be involved if you don't want to!'"

"We had just met that night. My condom use skyrocketed after that night."

Fullyme

"When I was a poverty-stricken college student I was banging a girl who said, 'If you get me pregnant I’ll take you for everything you own.' I said, 'All I own is my bicycle. You want that?'”

OrwellWasRight101

Amen

"Best weird compliment I ever got was 'Damn boy, you f**k like the Devil!'"

"I married her, we still goin' at it."

BeBearAwareOK

Well, these certainly created some lasting relationships... or hilarious tales to tell their friends.

Do you have any stories to share? Let us know in the comments below.

sex

The Absolute Weirdest Compliments People Have Ever Received

woman in black pants and red tank top
Jakayla Toney on Unsplash

Giving compliments is pretty easy, although most of us don't do it often enough.

Accepting compliments can be much harder.

Too many of us immediately shift into disclaimers to explain why we don't deserve the praise.

But we just need to say thank you—even if the compliment is a little odd.

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