Just as fast as you fall in love is just as fast as you can fall out of love. Sometimes we're blindsided by lust. We must go in ready and astute. Love is a tricky mistress, so maybe read "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert" by John Gottman before tying the knot. Marriage is not always the best choice. Case in point...
Redditor u/PhilipLiptonSchrute wanted to know what couples had to share about love by asking.... What's the fastest you've seen a couple go from married to divorced, and what caused it?
50. I Meth You forever....Giphy
The husband had an unsolicited outburst at a family dinner, "I KNOW YOU GUYS KNOW I DO METH! AND YOU NEED TO BACK OFF ABOUT IT!" wife didn't know; her dad didn't know; nobody knew. ThaiJohnnyDepp
49. Viva Las Vegas!
Some friends, who had been dating for a few months, got married in Las Vegas as sort of a drunken joke. The girl found out she would lose a lot of her trust fund because of being married. A gaggle of 4 lawyers were flown in and got a very quick retroactive annulment. Marriage lasted 4 days, except legally it was declared to have never existed at all. They dated for 3 more years then broke up. picksandchooses
48. Target Practice....
Next door neighbor got married. Less than 2 months later she moved out, said he was abusive and a drunk. A couple of weeks later he shot and killed their neighbor through the front door after an escalating feud involving the neighbor's dog getting shot with a bow and arrow. jjpearson
47. Day one....
Not sure how long it took the divorce to actually happen, but I went to a wedding where the bride didn't go home with the groom afterwards. There wasn't any cheating, she just decided she didn't want to be a military wife. They were together before he enlisted, so I think part of it was that she wasn't ready to move away from her family. It just sucked that she waited until that day to tell anyone. karethon
46. Texas Middleground?Giphy
My cousin and her first husband got divorced after about a month because one of them lived in Houston and the other in Dallas and they never really agreed how they were going to deal with that.
I'm sure there were other things too, but that was the official story. HelloIAmHawt
45. 10 Seconds IN....
I went to a wedding where the bride got drunk and the groom picked up her phone and saw that she was sexting a coworker during the entire wedding... He told the officiant to not file the paperwork. Great reception though.
This occurred at the end of the reception as they were leaving to go to the honeymoon suite (the story is she was very drunk and her phone kept getting notifications so he picked it up).
They did not go on their honeymoon and they returned the gifts to everyone. The guests weren't told about what happened for a couple weeks as the bride was trying to save the relationship. I was also not privy to the legality of the nuptials not being submitted to the city clerk, so I can't help on that front. human2be
44. I Do. Surprise!
Years and years ago, my Uncle's girlfriend planned a wedding and invited everyone and didn't tell him until the week of. I don't know the whole story about why she did it but he went through with it and quietly got it annulled and broke up with her. littlesmama12
My friend married this woman after years of dating. They were together about 6 months, then on their first Christmas, he got her a present and she got him nothing. Later that night she left their house and didn't come back until the next morning.
Apparently she had made an account on some dating site on Christmas, met a guy, and slept with him that night. She came clean the next day, but that was the end of their 6 month marriage. arcant12
42. Oh Baby!
A relative of mine had a marriage last less than 3 weeks. They had been together for a couple years and even went to premarital counseling at their church for a few months to get ready. Their wedding was super lavish and it was clear a lot of prep and money went into it. At their wedding they announced they were expecting their first child. Everything seemed great.
Unfortunately the whole thing blew up when the wife discovered he had been cheating on her for almost their entire relationship with multiple women. She found this out while in a foreign country on their honeymoon, 4 months pregnant. I know from her mom that she had complications in her pregnancy that they attribute to the stress of all of this.Stranger0nReddit
41. What about Zelda?Giphy
My dad and his second wife made it like not even four months before she left and I never saw or heard from her again. She said she was going to give me an old Nintendo 64, she never did. Boa-in-a-bowl
40. Passion Wanes....
I know two couples who got married for the sole purpose of having sex together. Both marriages lasted a year combined. GohanSawsWood
39. Not so "Special"
My wife's family's neighbor's daughter got married and threw a huge wedding day bash like spent 50-70 grand. Then not even 2 weeks later got divorced. She had been cheating on her husband throughout the engagement but still wanted her 'special day.' I heard later on that she had asked her mom if she had to live with her husband after they got married. TheBoBReaper
38. Last Night a DJ... nevermind...Giphy
I work as a clerk at a Family Courthouse.
Bride slept with the DJ. At the reception.
New record for the office pool.
EDIT: to be fair the divorce was about 2 months after the wedding when the husband was told by the maid of honor. Still, wild story. trampledbytramps
37. Take a slower 'I Do'
A relative of mine was forced into a shotgun wedding. The bride had a miscarriage, so they got divorced a month later. sexrockandroll
36. Get out of the Car!!!
I have a friend who proposed to his girlfriend like a week after he caught her cheating on him. He thought it would bring them closer and fix their relationship. Needless to say, he drove by his house on lunch a few months later and saw her co-workers truck in the driveway. He just drives right by. They are currently getting divorced after barely a year of marriage. barrymicokiner
35. Everybody Out!
Had a bit of a tip off when we didn't see the bride at the reception. She was next door in the carriage house restroom sobbing. She had just found out, on her wedding day, that her groom had once been engaged to one of her bridesmaids. The groom was NOT cheating on her, but just never got around to telling her that he and one of their "mutual friends" had once been an item. The groom spent the reception at the bar, the restaurant staff served the meal but there was no cake cutting, bridal dance etc... DavisSquared
34. I'm Colorblind....
When I worked at a college: Couple marries because she is pregnant, wants the baby in wedlock. Divorce (annulled I think, actually) when baby was born the wrong color 3 months later. goblinmarketeer
33. Happy New Year?Giphy
They got married in the October, she left him just after Christmas the same year. She was bored.
I don't know what he expected really, she'd cheated on him when they were engaged too and he'd forgiven her. What_A_Shocker
32. A Family Saga....
My neighbor got married at 19 and divorced when she was 20. Her parents got divorced while she was dating the guy and she moved in with him a couple months into the relationship. Together less than a year before they got married. Super young couple together for such a short time almost never works out. She didn't learn her lesson though because she got engaged to someone else barely a year later. They called it off and broke up before getting married though.
Sadly that's the happy story of the family because her younger sister got pregnant at 16 to a guy in his thirties and then a couple years later got pregnant by him again and married him. Then cheated with a much younger girl. Happened while they were together but they're still married with 2 children and she defends him on Facebook all the time. Magonus
31. That's an expensive day!
One of my friends from college filed for divorce ten months after her wedding. They were never really a good match and everyone could see it. Honestly? I think she just wanted to have a wedding and be a "princess for a day." Once she realized she actually had to keep the guy, she started having second thoughts. SaveBandit0215
30. The Blessing in Disguise....
My cousin was married and then three months later he had a brain aneurism and survived. His new wife divorced him soon after saying she wasn't prepared for that. He's now married to someone much nicer and twenty times more attractive. PiggBodine
29. Never Send Money!
Girl I went to HS with has four kids from her first marriage. They divorced when they were in their early 40's. She decides she wants to get married again. She wants a religious family man and is convinced Nigeria is the route to go. She starts chatting up Nigerian guys on Facebook.
Goes over there, marries a guy she just met via her Facebook husband search. After a few months of her sending money to him after she's home, she's unable to one month because she has four kids to worry bout. He freaks out and they wind up getting it annulled.
But wait! There's MORE!
A year later, she's on her way to Nigeria again because she's found another guy to marry. This time she goes over there once to visit, comes home, then basically is, "I am not giving you money until we marry." She goes back over again within 6 months to marry him. A month after getting home she finds out she's pregnant. All is well, eventually she's unable to send money because: four kids with TWINS on the way and that comes first. He gets upset and they wind up divorced. She later finds out he'd been chatting up other women around the world and getting money from them. And was only going to use her for a green card to get to the states.
I honestly don't feel bad for her. I feel bad for her six kids to have to witness their Mom make stupid decisions. No idea how the hell she afforded all those plane tickets. She's given up on Nigeria now. Jamaica is on her sights now. So, I am pretty sure before long, we'll see a shotgun wedding in Jamaica. tordenvaer
28. That's a Keith Morrison Situation....Giphy
How about the bride that pushed her new husband off a cliff on day 8?
When people noticed he wasn't around she notified the police. Then when they started searching for him and asking questions she sent an anonymous email from joe the plumber (from her parents computer) saying he is dead. Then when they still didn't stop investigating she led a search and rescue party directly to his body.
She said God led her to the spot. At the funeral she seemed relieved and guests heard her say she was glad that the police didn't have to be involved anymore. Eventually she made up a story about it being an accident. Finally she confesses to everything.
27. A Terrible Disease....
He started using meth again after years of recovery. They were married for less than a year. Kinda sad really. He's in rehab now. AnEquatorialManiac
26. Third Times the Charm....
I don't know how long it took for them to actually get divorced. But my uncle found out his new wife had been cheating on him right as they left on their honeymoon cruise. His second wife was also a short marriage where she was cheating on him. He's been happily married to his third wife for 5 years or so now, so that's good at least. pwlocke13
25. 7 Days Down...
One week, a couple of friends seemed happily married.
Next thing I know, the wife has shared a pic of herself on the beach in a wedding dress being lofted by some goth-looking long-haired dude, her new groom. No idea. DarthContinent
24. Family ain't Free....
A friend of mine worked for her husband's brother (it's how they met). Once they got married her boss stopped paying her because she was family now and "you don't have to pay family." So she quit and found another job immediately without consulting her husband, and in a fury her husband changed all the locks while she was asleep in the back bedroom, and put deadbolts on the outside of the door, so she could only leave their house if he let her out, and took her cell phone. (they didn't have a landline).
It took her about 2 hours to get ahold of us online (dumb@ss didn't think she could contact people with a laptop), so we called the police who busted down the door and got her out. Husband went to prison, her divorce went through REAL quick, and now (5 years later) she lives on the coast and got engaged again to a very sweet guy who knows we're all watching like hawks. Manda-the-Panda
23. Kids ruin Everything!
Relative of mine got married and divorced 6 months later. Turns out they had never seriously discussed whether or not they wanted children prior to getting married. One adamantly wanted children and the other didn't and it drove them apart. They were together for 3 or 4 years before getting married and somehow never figured this out. Keebs-
22. The Photographer sees all....Giphy
Wedding photographer here.. Over 5 years, I know of 3 couples that are no longer together.
- One couple married in September, divorced by February
- One couple had been high school sweethearts, waited 10 years to get married, and the marriage from what I can see lasted less than a year.
- The other couple, the groom was drunk for the whole wedding, felt up his mother, and they used to post their photos all over FB and IG - now they're no longer to be seen, and the status of married is gone. punknkat
21. Jekyll & Hyde....
My little sister got married to "the love of her life" at 17. 2 months later she ran away and filed for divorce bc her 22 year old husband became an abusive drunk as soon as their marriage license was signed. TheElvenWitch777
20. She Cray. HIDE!!!
My boyfriends cousin.
She's 21 dating a 19 year old who looks 12 and is tiny. She's a very large woman. She's extremely physically abusive. I watched her pick this man up and lock him in the trunk of a car by sitting on top of it to induce a panic attack and win their argument at work.
He always has bruises and black eyes.
He proposes to her after a few months of dating, they get married. He annuls the marriage and leaves in secret the next day. Goes into hiding for 6 months. She posts lots of woe is me sappy break up stuff.
Somehow out of no where he's just back. They remarry at the court house and now she's saying she's pregnant but not telling her family. Her husband looks miserable and according to the grape vine doesn't work anymore and is confined to the apartment they share. Whether that's by choice or not is up for debate.
The poor guy looks like a withered husk of himself and he's only 19. RealAbstractSquidII
19. Animals Come First....
My uncle had married someone 3 months after dating them. He had 2 dachshunds and 2 cats. She demanded that he got rid of the dogs and got two new ones of her choice. They divorced in two weeks. biggestwigga
18. A Close Call....
Well, it wasn't really a divorce.
My brother married his girlfriend in Japan - Cinderella wedding at Disneyland and everything. Turns out she decided she was going to stay in Japan, despite them planning to move to Canada with him. Later he found out she never submitted the paperwork, so they were never married. HSteamy
17. The Big S...Giphy
Friend of mine was divorced and remarried in the same month. We all thought it was a little quick, but turns out they had been hot for each other for years. Anyway, a couple months after she got married, I saw her Facebook status changed to "separated." Don't know if they're still married or not. Dano420
Young couple in their late 20's, bride was the daughter of a friend. Daughter never learned to budget, save, spend wisely, pay bills on time, prioritize. They both worked full time at good jobs in San Francisco and lived in Pacific Heights in a purchased condo that was quite nice. She took them both into a ton of debt.
Had to have the very latest of everything that was material in nature, clothing, furniture, etc. She would put $1,000 on their credit card in an hour on absolutely nothing. She nagged her husband from the moment he walked in the door from work, even in front of company. It lasted two years. He couldn't get away fast enough. Her wedding photos were hilarious. No smiles. justusethatname
15. I Dare You!
About thirty minutes.
Bride told the groom in the run-up to the wedding, "Do NOT smash the cake in my face. Do NOT."
His buddies all got on him about being a wuss and showing her "Who's really in charge of this marriage..."
I was at the wedding, he smashed the cake in her face, she walked out of the reception and had it annulled. dramboxf
14. Hide the bank accounts....
Two weeks. Kind of a long story.
My sister was married to a real jacka**. She stayed too long and the divorce has been bitter. The ex husband is convinced my sister has a secret trust fund she is living off of and he wants half. There is no such trust fund. I mean, in what hopefully will be many years when my Dad dies, there may be money from his trust but he's very much alive, so he's not entitled to that.
So my sister hooked up with another guy who apparently is friends with the ex. The ex told him about the "trust fund" and somehow convinced my gullible sister to marry him, in the hopes that he would be more successful in getting the trust fund (the one that doesn't exist). This new husband, within days of marrying my sister brought his ex-girlfriend (baby mama who was supposedly in an abusive relationship) and his child to stay with them.
Very shortly after it was learned that new hubby has been with baby mama the entire duration of the relationship and the guy only went out with her because he thought she was a trust fund kid. So within a couple of weeks after the nuptials they were at each other's throats and he had thrown out and actually arrested and basically kept all her belongings. He filed a restraining order against so she couldn't come to the house.
I'm not saying my sister deserved this, but she does have a habit of stretching the truth. These guys didn't get the idea there was a trust fund from their butts. This marriage only basically lasted two weeks. gabberrella24
13. Overwhelming Grief....
It is very tragic, but dad was driving two of his boys home from a camping trip, and they got into an accident and the car went into the lake. Dad was able to rescue the oldest boy but he could not get the youngest out of his car seat in time. They were able to get the little one breathing but he had no brain activity and they had to pull the plug.
The marriage ended pretty much immediately. adairtd
12. What's Up Bill?Giphy
When I was in the Army, my ex-wife and I were good friends with a couple that lived a few doors down from us. One day i get home from work, and he's sitting on his front door step...I said "hey" he said "dude, you gotta come see this."
So I walked into his house, and it's empty. completely, not a scrap of paper...not a bag of trash. The weird thing was every cabinet door was open, refrigerator door open, every drawer open. If it was supposed to be closed, it was open.
He said the front door was wide open when he got home, and every faucet was turned on too. No note, nothing... his wife was just gone with everything in the house.
The thing was my ex-wife and I had dinner with them, in their house, the night before. laughing it up, drinking wine, having a great time... no sign of a thing wrong.
He said the first thing he did was call her parents house, and her father answered the phone... before he could even ask if he knew what was going on, the father said "Bill, you need to let it go" and hung up.
Remember that line from "True Lies" when Tom Arnold says his ex wife even took the ice cube trays...well, she took the ice cube trays. also took all of his uniforms and other clothes. He literally had the clothes on his back and what was in his pockets to his name. I never did find out what the motivator was, she was just gone. McFeely_Smackup
11. $800 is all...
My own marriage in 2004. Kissed my wife goodbye for a three month deployment to Pakistan in March. I never saw her again. After two months of being there she told me she wanted to leave me. At the time, there was a loophole in divorce law one website was exploiting. Quicksimpledivorce.com. Lawyers in Guam were allowed to process uncontested divorces pretty quickly.
Paid $800 and sent her the paperwork, we were living in Germany at the time and she signed and left for the US before I got home. The divorce was finalized in August of 2004.
What caused it? Dunno really, honestly she was unhappy prior to my departure. We had only been married a couple years, we kinda rushed to get married in 2002 when I got orders to Germany. sarzec
10. Punch Him!
Worked at a wedding venue and the bride told the groom who was from Arkansas that there was to be no call of the hogs during the wedding speech.
Groomsman proceeds to do it anyway, and the bride was furious and went into the back with the bridal party. Dude slapped her and said this crap is getting annulled tomorrow. Honestly she might have not dodged the slap, but she dodged a bullet. PuntingMuffCuts
9. The Life Suck.
The actual divorce has to wait because of visa issues, but basically they got married, everything was fine and then about a month later she got weirdly quiet about their relationships and about 9 months after the wedding he told her he thinks of her like a sister.
Holiday romance, long distance for several years, a ton of red flags and the second they moved in together things went to hell. Basically he didn't do crap around the home, she earned all the money and paid for all of his stuff on top of it, he then squandered her money even when she asked him not to (she actually had to put a limit on his phone contract). I don't think he planned to leech on her, he's just an inconsiderate a**hole. They're waiting it out because she's too nice to send him back. IncrediblePlatypus
8. Dirty Peter Pan...Giphy
One of my classmates in HS married her boyfriend before graduating college. She was one of those girls that had her entire life planned, so we were a little surprised that she didn't wait to graduate, but he was just about perfect so it made sense. He was intelligent, motivated, sweet, etc. He would come over to her house on weekends and mow her grass, do little repair jobs, take out the trash. Perfect courtship, beautiful proposal, a wedding that everyone talked about for weeks. 6 mo later we go out for a girls night and we beg for details on her wedded bliss, seeing as she's the first one married and she breaks down.
He had just stopped. Everything he had done before marriage just disappeared. It was like he was done adulting and reverted back to childhood. Wouldn't eat anything but spaghetti and chicken nuggets, literally. Started skipping class, cut his hours at work to less than half, didn't do any housework, any yardwork, would spend the entire night up with his best friend plating video games, to the point the friend complained. Drama intensified, and they were divorced before they hit their 1 year anniversary. Gruesomegiggles
7. Take your Space....
Good friend of mine got married. On their honeymoon husband tells her he needs space and isn't sure what he wants. Then he tells her he's leaving her for her best friend, who he's having an affair with. My friend is now blissfully happy and thriving and he's still a piece of garbage. visceraltides
6. Here is to 9 more!
My dad worked with a guy who had nine divorces under his belt, shortest lasting two weeks. They were dating for a week, got married, and divorced two weeks later. No one knows why. JalapenoBridger
5. No more Fireworks....
6 months. Both bride and groom were good friends of mine. Had the wedding at the most expensive yacht clubs in my state. Full Vera Wang tuxedos for all the groomsmen bought for us not rented. Had the wedding on July 4th weekend didn't last until the end of January. Rsmithjr1
4. Thank you Universe....
My boyfriend of on and off for 6 years started cheating on me with this girl in Texas (we lived in California). We broke up due to the cheating, a month or so later the girl moved in with him.
They got married on my birthday. Divorced 2 months later because they were both abusive to each other and she was cheating on him with his best friend.
Sometimes Karma is just so real. universalknowing
3. Immediate End!Giphy
My friend cheated on his wife AT THEIR WEDDING. She found out about half an hour after doing the paperwork and separation was immediate. looncraz
2. No Big Deal...
I knew a couple that did the whole "I don't know if I can make a commitment like getting married to you, but having two kids with you is nbd!" deal and after a couple years of it they tie the knot. A couple months later, her FB status is single. He was a massage therapist and had 3 girls on the side that he was meeting for their "night massages because she works all day and can't come in then." Beachy5313
1. Self Service Aisle....
Best man at my wedding was driving to his honeymoon with his new bride when she told him, "I don't think I want kids." This was after being together for years and claiming that she did want kids. Then as they pulled into a gas station she told him, "I don't think I want to be married."
He almost left her at the gas station.
After they got back from their honeymoon, she would stay out until 4 AM just about every night. No calls or texts, just wasn't coming home until very late.
They were divorced within six months of the wedding.
My wedding was not too long after his divorce was finalized. I told him very clearly that he was allowed to give a rambling Mosby-esque speech about how love was f---ed. He gave a very nice, funny speech instead. drewofdoom
Being woken up suddenly is not very good for our health.
Especially for the elderly, it's not something to make a habit of. Sleep interruption can increase blood pressure, cause a worsened self image, and cause a day filled with irritation and confusion.
No one wants to be woken up, but there are definitely some reasons for being woken up that are worse than your alarm clock.
We went to Ask Reddit to find out some of the worst reasons people have been woken up.
Redditor Toothpiicxxk asked:
"What's the worst reason you woke up?"
These truly are the worst.
We love our pets, but sometimes not so much.
"My cat was throwing up right next to me."
"She brought you breakfast how cute."
"I was just about to answer that my cat threw up right on me, specifically my hair, which I had just washed..."
Some horrible news hits you.
"Being woken up to be told someone you know died certainly qualifies."
"Or when you already know, but you wake up in that ignorant bliss that lasts for about a second and then it hits you. And this goes on for a long time."
"It's been about 15 years and I still will wake up on occasion thinking I have to tell my older brother something cool that I know he'd love to hear about. Or have a vivid a** dream about how it was all an mistake and he's still here. Happens less often then it used to but oof does it ever still hurt."
"Woke up at about 3am to a cop repeatedly ringing my bell. my mom had accidentally drowned in the tub. she was really weak from chemo."
"Woke up to a phone call telling me my incredible brother-in-law had been hit and killed by a drunk & high driver, his wife was also expected to pass as her neck had been broken, and their kids were both in surgery. My husband and I were in the will to get the kids, so we needed to fly to Chicago right away. As I sat there in shock, I hung up the phone, turned to see my sleeping husband snoring away, and knowing I would now have to wake him up to tell him the worst news he would ever hear."
2018 false missile alert.
"I live in Hawaii, that time we got the missile scare."
"Oof at least it wasn't real but I would have definitely panicked if that was me."
"Damn, I slept straight through it. My mom literally woke me up, told me; and I still went back to sleep."
"What were you supposed to do? Go outside and witness your annihilation?"
"I think it's the right thing to do to inform people even if there isn't necessarily anything that can be done about it."
"Some people would appreciate being able to conduct prayers, get one last hug with their loved ones, etc."
"Cockroach walking on my lips with no shame. I brutally murdered it as soon as I yeeted it halfway across the room."
"I had a weird dream about a cockroach somehow paralyzing a friend then walking towards me in that same room. Then I awoke to find this a**hole cockroach slowly creeping on my lips."
"When I threw it away, what startled me was it did not panic AT ALL. It even slowly headed towards me!"
"I also mouth washed and brushed my teeth and even disinfected my lips with alcohol. It was a surreal experience."
"I seriously loathe roaches and there's no other way to ensure its death than a brutal one."
Screams in the night.
"One time I got woken up by a blood curdling scream in the middle of the night. I live alone and it also woke up my dog who was freaked out the rest of the night. Searched everywhere including outside and didn't find anything."
"Well that was lucky. Imagine what would have happened if you had found it..."
"Hopefully a fox, coyote, cat, or cougar."
"Being clearly asleep, and then someone wakes you to ask, 'Are you asleep?'"
"Bruh my mom be like [this]."
"The only correct answer to this question is 'yes.'"
"I woke up to my mom calling me sobbing because she thought I had died, I was 10 hours away and my blood sugar was severely low and wasn't answering any calls, that was horrifying."
"We've learned what does and doesn't work for waking me up in a medical emergency."
"Blood sugar can be a b*tch, found my mum having a really bad hypo while sleeping when I was a toddler and for years and years after would wake her up to check she was okay without realizing I was doing it for that reason. Glad you're okay!"
Something so relatable.
"My alarm rung. It's a daily struggle."
We've all been there.
If you're not a morning person, waking up in the morning can already be a challenge, but no one wants to get woken up to horrible news or an emergency.
In fact, we should be waking up naturally with our own personal sleeping patterns.
We all know that's easier said than done.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
People have a habit of excusing crap behavior - honestly because it's often easier in the short term. Long term = flaming dumpster fire.
The excuses people use to dismiss behavior range from mundane and meaningless to the sort of leaps normally reserved for kangaroos and Olympians. It's sometimes amazing that these excuses work - but they do.
Some of them work so well that they're just sort of "accepted." That, obviously, kind of sucks and is something we should avoid - so let's talk about 'em.
Can't swerve around what you don't see, ya know?
Reddit user TMTtasmachine asked:
... and away we go.
" 'That's just how they are.' "
"One of the biggest enablers for tantrum throwing, bullying, etc. is that they get treated with kid gloves to avoid dealing with them." - alexrt87
"Oh my God you hit the nail on the head. Whenever someone says 'that's just the way they are' I say:"
" 'Yes, that's the point! Glad you noticed too! Now is it okey-doke for them to be jerks they have special jerk privileges? Or maybe they are just people and should treat everyone else as such?' " - notatrumpchump
"It depends on how it's said."
"People are the way that they are, and you shouldn't be surprised when they continue to be that way."
"This, obviously, doesn't excuse it - but people also shouldn't be surprised when a bad person continues to make bad decisions. Neither should we waste space in our minds being bothered by it." - unlawfulfoxy
Harassment Isn't Humorseason 2 lol GIF by ShamelessGiphy
" 'It's just a joke, bro.' Harassing people isn't humor." - loading__99
"A guy who says/does offensive things and decides whether he was joking based on the reaction of people around him." - Eatsleeptren
"Dude, legit had someone come up to me and start shouting in my face, calling me Madison, pretending I was cheating on him. Literally the most crowded location outside a theater, everyone staring at us, looking at me like I was some horrible cheater while I was out with my then fiancé."
"I started hyperventilating, my fiancé nearly decked the dude, and then someone shouts 'CUT' like this is some big 'YOU'RE ON CANDID CAMERA' moment and everything's supposed to be okay."
"I burst into tears."
"It was the most humiliating moment of my life, and thank god my then fiancé, now husband is not the type to overreact or jump to conclusions, or be abusive. Imagine how bad that could have been for someone with an angry or abusive partner."
"Prank videos are a plague on the internet and there is a REASON so many of them are fake, or involve actors." - Darkovika
Stay Sober, Then!Drunk Drinking Beer GIFGiphy
" 'I was drunk / high / etc.' "
"Then don't drink?! Stay sober if you can't NOT be an a**hole!" - BasedBenjamin
"Alternately, I hear a lot of 'I'm a happy drunk!' "
"Yeah, according to your drunk a$s. That doesn't mean you're not an ahole. Not remembering is not an excuse either." - PepeBabinski
"I was also loud, obnoxious, and I wouldn't remember sh*t the next day."
"Quitting drinking has been one of my best choices of my life." - TTungsteNN
"Help"new girl coach GIFGiphy
" 'I'm just trying to help you' " - Miserable-Air1234
"Every time I've heard this, they're manipulating me while helping only themselves." - mykittenfarts
"My Mom to a T. Everything she does is better than anyone else's and she always gets pissed that people don't praise her for 'helping.' "
"She's now a certified (by herself) psychic and I have come to the conclusion that she's not a covert narcissist but an obvious one. I really wish I was joking." - Silent_Discussion657
Parenting ProblemsLeave Me Alone Run GIF by TLC EuropeGiphy
"Any variation of 'I'm a Mother/parent.' "
"Had some lady cut me in line at a coffee shop and she hit me with 'I'm a single Mom of 3!' as her excuse."
"Ok? And? I was still here first." - maid-for-hire
"I'm a single mom and I f*cking haaaate when other single moms/parents pull that sh*t to get special treatment."
"Last week, I was having a rough morning, my kid was being difficult, and I was running late. I was rude to a cashier over a minor inconvenience."
"Not only did I apologize for my shitty behavior, I wrote corporate to let them know how professional and patient she was while I acted like a f*cking toddler."
"Was being a parent part of the reason I was frustrated? Absolutely. Was it an excuse for that behavior? HELL no."
"I acted like a b*tch, and I called myself out, and I apologized. I still feel bad about that - I rarely let things get to me to the point I snap at others." - ClusterfckyShtshow
"Wow. I'm a Mom as well and tired but it doesn't give anyone a right to use it as some sort of ploy to get away with stuff."
"Like, mice become Moms about 12 times a year. You're not special 🤣" - SpoonLoops
Believing Your BossThe Office Monday GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy
"I had a boss say some really racist sh*t around me one day and the next day, out of nowhere, he says:"
" 'Don't believe half the things that come out of my mouth!' "
"It was not really an excuse, more like trying to cover for himself after the fact, but still stuck with me." - sirlongbottom441
"Report them to HR. Seriously." - kokichi--ouma
"Looking past the racist stuff for a bit, that's not a very encouraging thing to hear from a boss…" - WonderfulBlackberry9
Bad Day AgainBad Day Reaction GIF by Schitt's CreekGiphy
" 'I'm having a bad day/week' "
"Okay, so you decide everybody that you interact with deserves the same fate? Get out of here, dude." - myordinaryexistence
"We all got stress, don't take it out on me. I get some people have stress bad enough for it to be passable every once and a while (family member passing, etc) but general, stress should not lead to you being a jerk to me." - willsimpforfree
"Damn, I'm definitely guilty of this. Usually I remember to apologize after but at this point I've learned to just avoid the situation in the first place by minimizing my interaction with people if I'm in a shitty mood." - nozzzrul
"Reminds me of when that White boy went on a murder rampage and killed a bunch of Asian women & that a-hole sheriff gave a press conference telling the media that the 'poor boy had a bad day.' "
"My idea of a bad day involves going home after a rough day at work and just staying in the house."
"Apparently, I should change my ethnicity from Asian to White and go on a murder rampage, see if my @ss gets a sympathetic sheriff to say on my behalf that I had 'a bad day.' " - kingkazul400
It's Not An ExcuseSeason 2 Reaction GIF by FriendsGiphy
"This won't go down well, but using depression as an excuse. As someone who suffers from it, it's still not ok to treat others like sh*t" - Rainbowwallstickers
"Could not agree enough. My partner has a 'friend' who treats everyone like sh*t all the time, has no consideration for others and openly mocks people in public."
"She gets so much grace from those around her under the guise of her 'mental health.' It's so infuriating watching an adult woman never have to take responsibility for her actions." - 34boor
"I get there are some things you can't control, but you are still responsible for keeping that sh*t in check and if you're aware of your mental illness, you should be aware of how you approach people and situations."
"I'll admit I used to be guilty of using my mental illness to be an @ss, but now I'm trying to better myself" - VeeSquibbles
Florida Gonna FloridaLooney Tunes Florida GIFGiphy
"People are letting Florida off the hook way too damn much. And I live in Florida."
"Just because it's hilarious doesn't mean it isn't still completely f*cked up." - AlphaWhiskeyOscar
"The phrase 'Florida Man' is almost always followed some heinous way a Floridian is being an a$$hole." - PepeBabinski
"I'm also originally from Florida, and that state has serious problems. We need to pay attention to it." - [Reddit]
Moment of honesty ... as a Floridian ... yeaaaah, I'm gonna have to agree with that last one.
We live in a time where we are critically re-examining how we pay workers. After a two-year-long pandemic where some low-income and "unskilled" jobs were deemed "essential," we now must put our money where our mouth is.
For too long in the world have incredibly important jobs been overlooked or else outright maligned. Teachers in the USA make some of the least money, career-wise, and have some of the hardest jobs. Dancers pay to put their bodies through hell with no guarantee of paid work after training.
So how do we fix this problem? By naming it, of course.
Redditor u/NightReader5 asked:
"What professions are severely underpaid?"
Here were some of those answers.
Our Elderly Deserve Better
"I worked as a CNA in a nursing home and I loved it. It's such hard work for such little pay and that's why I had to leave."
"Not only that but I was a rare person in that I LOVED caring for the residents. Nothing was beneath me such as changing a dirty diaper or spoon feeding."
"Everything helped their quality of life. Sucks they can't keep people that genuinely enjoy it cause I couldn't make over $10 an hour."-Dancer9d9
"Came here to say this: Emergency Medical Technicians. I will never not be just a bit salty about this."
"My husband is one of those people who does this job because it's his passion and he loves helping people."
"It would be nice if he earned more than the kid who just got hired at McDonald's this morning."-ThePotterheadHobbit
High School Bathrooms....
"The janitors at my high school. I walked in the men's bathroom there once and there was a mega-giant steaming pile of crap and diarrhea right in the middle of the floor."-satanic-sex-god
"Anyhow. Are you sure that was a high school? We're talking grades 9-12 here, right?"-VoicedVelarNasal
"Unfortunately yes. Other highlights of my oh so great high school men's bathroom that contains teenagers from 14 to as old as 20 are:"
"A dude bringing a sledgehammer to school and smashing a sink, the toilets being blown up, the toilets being frequently clogged with trash..."
"Smashed beer bottle glass covering the floor, and a centimeter of pee flooding the bathroom whenever you walk in. I hate it here."-satanic-sex-god
You know immediately YOU might not want to do this job--so why is someone else getting paid next to nothing to do it?
The More You Help Others The Less You Get Paid
"Statistically speaking, any job that provides significant social benefit to others, the less you will get paid, something that David Graeber discusses in essays and his work, Bullsh*t Jobs."
"This is so sad. I'm currently in a job that pays very well, I just dont find any meaning or fulfillment with it. I want so badly to do something where I'd be helping others- something with purpose- but I honestly dont think I can afford it."-mko0njo9
"Social workers. Dealing with negligent, abusive parents while trying to help the children while in an underfunded, low-paid system is a travesty."-ZRX1200R
"Can also confirm. I like working with my family's but I don't get paid enough to deal with their crap or most of the bureaucracy."-Altowhovian93
Minimum Wage To Go Against FIRE
"Entry level wildland firefighters. They start them at $15 an hour."-NuclearEyedSquirrel
"I live in a small town in Ohio and I think the lowest starting wage I've seen was 11."
"That's the low side and those places are having trouble hiring because there's so many places paying higher. McDonald's here starts at 13 or 14 an hour."-rjoh4459
One Kid, One Para
"Paraprofessionals. Yea, my town increased the pay rate for paraprofessionals to get more people to apply since they have a shortage but the pay increase was not that good IMO."
"For that job, I think you need to be compensated for the physical and mental demands of the job."
"It's a hard job and they should be paid for the work, the pay rate in my community for the job with 60 credits is $14.50 but I think it should be more than that."-YourQueen2Bee
The question then becomes, why won't the people who HAVE money do something to help the quality of these jobs, and make sure that these people get paid?
"Everything in veterinary medicine. Kennel technicians, Veterinary assistants, Veterinary technicians, Veterinary receptionists, and Veterinarians."-aIsiduous
"Veterinary interns/residents, too. I work 70-120hrs+ per week, am on call about half the days per month, have to pay for my own board exams and accreditation fees out of pocket, and all for ~$33,000 per year."-WyrdHarper
"It's bullsh*t. There's nothing on this planet I want to do more than be a veterinarian, but I simply cannot afford the debt. Hopefully one day we'll get the recognition deserved. Stick in there, I know you got this!"--aIsiduous
In The Classroom
"I work in a special school, I love it but I really don't think we get paid enough for all the times we get yelled at, punched, kicked, bit, spat on, cursed at, have our classrooms trashed, have things thrown at us..."
"And then we also have parents making demands and admin telling us their 'simple' solutions to all of it that we have to carry out while they have zero clue on what it's actually like to spend a day in the classroom."-Sajiri
A Morbid State Of Affairs
"Funeral directors/embalmers/funeral professionals. We didn't get days or holidays off to begin with. Now the pandemic has stretched us to working double overtime, which we are exempt from getting paid for under Florida statutes."
"And forget hazard pay for being exposed to COVID multiple times a day every day via the deceased, the deceased's family members, the general public attending funerals, and the hospital/nursing facilities we remove decedents from."-Lesscute
So why are we holding off on giving these people a raise? Their jobs involve dangerous, mentally and emotionally taxing situations, and yet, we treat them as if society could function without them. The truth is it couldn't.
And society had best learn that as soon as possible.
What causes a small town to die?
Honestly, there can be quite a few factors, but perhaps the biggest one is that small towns often lack the upward mobility opportunities that are more available in urban areas.
As a result, many towns around the United States for instance have lost tens of millions of people as their populations seek jobs and opportunities elsewhere.
And what remains of these places can be pretty sketchy.
People told us more after Redditor RadicalizedSnackWrap asked the online community,
"What's a super sketchy US city that we never hear about?"
"Daytona Beach, FL. Imagine a bunch of alcoholic high school kids who came for spring break in 1984, and never left, and never grew up."
Oh, I don't have to imagine it.
I've seen it!
I lived in a neighboring town for a while and bodies would always turn up in farmer's fields that the cartel in Yakima had dropped off there."
Sounds like Netflix needs to get its hands on Yakima, a new show to go against Ozark.
"I remember a story..."
"Guntersville, Alabama. If I were to ballpark it, over 80% of the population are meth addicts and traffickers.
I remember a story where a man walked into the Walmart, took all the supplies and equipment required to cook, and proceeded to cook meth in the bathroom."
"A run-down town..."
"Reading, PA. A run-down town that is mostly used as a central point to run drugs between New York and Philly."
I am writing this from right nearby actually, and I can smell it from here.
"Small town almost entirely..."
"Butte, Montana. Small town almost entirely comprised of violent meth heads."
"More of a town than a city..."
More of a town than a city, but it's such a weird place, bordering on Twilight Zone. You'll see a meth house right next to a youth theatre."
According to a friend I have who spent a lot of time in Arizona, this sounds about right.
"Used to have..."
"Gary, Indiana. Used to have a prosperous steel economy, but now it's just home to abandoned buildings, failing infrastructure, and lots and lots of crime. Just look up pictures."
"I always said..."
"Amityville. Yes, that Amityville.
I always said the "Amityville Horror" house is for amateurs. You want something scary, put on a nice watch or a gold chain and wander around downtown Amityville after dark."
I went there once.
I have not been back.
"It looks harmless..."
"Harrisburg PA. It looks harmless and maybe a little boring but holy hell that place is a giant puddle of corruption just waiting for someone to step in it. Not just state government, there's a bunch of layers you can use to crawl up the corruption ladder."
"Used to be..."
"Natchez, Mississippi. Use to be the headquarters for the KKK. Not much there besides crackheads, plantation homes, and European tourists. Don't own a nice place if you're black, you'll be stopped by the police and questioned."
It doesn't look any of these are changing anytime soon, and that's sad.
Have some small towns to tell us about? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!