People Share The Fastest Way They've Seen Couples Go From Married To Divorced
Well love is not guaranteed forever!
Just as fast as you fall in love is just as fast as you can fall out of love. Sometimes we're blindsided by lust. We must go in ready and astute. Love is a tricky mistress, so maybe read "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert" by John Gottman before tying the knot. Marriage is not always the best choice. Case in point...
Redditor u/PhilipLiptonSchrute wanted to know what couples had to share about love by asking.... What's the fastest you've seen a couple go from married to divorced, and what caused it?
50. I Meth You forever....
The husband had an unsolicited outburst at a family dinner, "I KNOW YOU GUYS KNOW I DO METH! AND YOU NEED TO BACK OFF ABOUT IT!" wife didn't know; her dad didn't know; nobody knew. ThaiJohnnyDepp
49. Viva Las Vegas!
Some friends, who had been dating for a few months, got married in Las Vegas as sort of a drunken joke. The girl found out she would lose a lot of her trust fund because of being married. A gaggle of 4 lawyers were flown in and got a very quick retroactive annulment. Marriage lasted 4 days, except legally it was declared to have never existed at all. They dated for 3 more years then broke up. picksandchooses
48. Target Practice....
Next door neighbor got married. Less than 2 months later she moved out, said he was abusive and a drunk. A couple of weeks later he shot and killed their neighbor through the front door after an escalating feud involving the neighbor's dog getting shot with a bow and arrow. jjpearson
47. Day one....
Not sure how long it took the divorce to actually happen, but I went to a wedding where the bride didn't go home with the groom afterwards. There wasn't any cheating, she just decided she didn't want to be a military wife. They were together before he enlisted, so I think part of it was that she wasn't ready to move away from her family. It just sucked that she waited until that day to tell anyone. karethon
46. Texas Middleground?
My cousin and her first husband got divorced after about a month because one of them lived in Houston and the other in Dallas and they never really agreed how they were going to deal with that.
I'm sure there were other things too, but that was the official story. HelloIAmHawt
45. 10 Seconds IN....
I went to a wedding where the bride got drunk and the groom picked up her phone and saw that she was sexting a coworker during the entire wedding... He told the officiant to not file the paperwork. Great reception though.
This occurred at the end of the reception as they were leaving to go to the honeymoon suite (the story is she was very drunk and her phone kept getting notifications so he picked it up).
They did not go on their honeymoon and they returned the gifts to everyone. The guests weren't told about what happened for a couple weeks as the bride was trying to save the relationship. I was also not privy to the legality of the nuptials not being submitted to the city clerk, so I can't help on that front. human2be
44. I Do. Surprise!
Years and years ago, my Uncle's girlfriend planned a wedding and invited everyone and didn't tell him until the week of. I don't know the whole story about why she did it but he went through with it and quietly got it annulled and broke up with her. littlesmama12
43. Ho-Ho-Ho!
My friend married this woman after years of dating. They were together about 6 months, then on their first Christmas, he got her a present and she got him nothing. Later that night she left their house and didn't come back until the next morning.
Apparently she had made an account on some dating site on Christmas, met a guy, and slept with him that night. She came clean the next day, but that was the end of their 6 month marriage. arcant12
42. Oh Baby!
A relative of mine had a marriage last less than 3 weeks. They had been together for a couple years and even went to premarital counseling at their church for a few months to get ready. Their wedding was super lavish and it was clear a lot of prep and money went into it. At their wedding they announced they were expecting their first child. Everything seemed great.
Unfortunately the whole thing blew up when the wife discovered he had been cheating on her for almost their entire relationship with multiple women. She found this out while in a foreign country on their honeymoon, 4 months pregnant. I know from her mom that she had complications in her pregnancy that they attribute to the stress of all of this.Stranger0nReddit
41. What about Zelda?
My dad and his second wife made it like not even four months before she left and I never saw or heard from her again. She said she was going to give me an old Nintendo 64, she never did. Boa-in-a-bowl
40. Passion Wanes....
I know two couples who got married for the sole purpose of having sex together. Both marriages lasted a year combined. GohanSawsWood
39. Not so "Special"
My wife's family's neighbor's daughter got married and threw a huge wedding day bash like spent 50-70 grand. Then not even 2 weeks later got divorced. She had been cheating on her husband throughout the engagement but still wanted her 'special day.' I heard later on that she had asked her mom if she had to live with her husband after they got married. TheBoBReaper
38. Last Night a DJ... nevermind...
I work as a clerk at a Family Courthouse.
Bride slept with the DJ. At the reception.
New record for the office pool.
EDIT: to be fair the divorce was about 2 months after the wedding when the husband was told by the maid of honor. Still, wild story. trampledbytramps
37. Take a slower 'I Do'
A relative of mine was forced into a shotgun wedding. The bride had a miscarriage, so they got divorced a month later. sexrockandroll
36. Get out of the Car!!!
I have a friend who proposed to his girlfriend like a week after he caught her cheating on him. He thought it would bring them closer and fix their relationship. Needless to say, he drove by his house on lunch a few months later and saw her co-workers truck in the driveway. He just drives right by. They are currently getting divorced after barely a year of marriage. barrymicokiner
35. Everybody Out!
Had a bit of a tip off when we didn't see the bride at the reception. She was next door in the carriage house restroom sobbing. She had just found out, on her wedding day, that her groom had once been engaged to one of her bridesmaids. The groom was NOT cheating on her, but just never got around to telling her that he and one of their "mutual friends" had once been an item. The groom spent the reception at the bar, the restaurant staff served the meal but there was no cake cutting, bridal dance etc... DavisSquared
34. I'm Colorblind....
When I worked at a college: Couple marries because she is pregnant, wants the baby in wedlock. Divorce (annulled I think, actually) when baby was born the wrong color 3 months later. goblinmarketeer
33. Happy New Year?
They got married in the October, she left him just after Christmas the same year. She was bored.
I don't know what he expected really, she'd cheated on him when they were engaged too and he'd forgiven her. What_A_Shocker
32. A Family Saga....
My neighbor got married at 19 and divorced when she was 20. Her parents got divorced while she was dating the guy and she moved in with him a couple months into the relationship. Together less than a year before they got married. Super young couple together for such a short time almost never works out. She didn't learn her lesson though because she got engaged to someone else barely a year later. They called it off and broke up before getting married though.
Sadly that's the happy story of the family because her younger sister got pregnant at 16 to a guy in his thirties and then a couple years later got pregnant by him again and married him. Then cheated with a much younger girl. Happened while they were together but they're still married with 2 children and she defends him on Facebook all the time. Magonus
31. That's an expensive day!
One of my friends from college filed for divorce ten months after her wedding. They were never really a good match and everyone could see it. Honestly? I think she just wanted to have a wedding and be a "princess for a day." Once she realized she actually had to keep the guy, she started having second thoughts. SaveBandit0215
30. The Blessing in Disguise....
My cousin was married and then three months later he had a brain aneurism and survived. His new wife divorced him soon after saying she wasn't prepared for that. He's now married to someone much nicer and twenty times more attractive. PiggBodine
29. Never Send Money!
Girl I went to HS with has four kids from her first marriage. They divorced when they were in their early 40's. She decides she wants to get married again. She wants a religious family man and is convinced Nigeria is the route to go. She starts chatting up Nigerian guys on Facebook.
Goes over there, marries a guy she just met via her Facebook husband search. After a few months of her sending money to him after she's home, she's unable to one month because she has four kids to worry bout. He freaks out and they wind up getting it annulled.
But wait! There's MORE!
A year later, she's on her way to Nigeria again because she's found another guy to marry. This time she goes over there once to visit, comes home, then basically is, "I am not giving you money until we marry." She goes back over again within 6 months to marry him. A month after getting home she finds out she's pregnant. All is well, eventually she's unable to send money because: four kids with TWINS on the way and that comes first. He gets upset and they wind up divorced. She later finds out he'd been chatting up other women around the world and getting money from them. And was only going to use her for a green card to get to the states.
I honestly don't feel bad for her. I feel bad for her six kids to have to witness their Mom make stupid decisions. No idea how the hell she afforded all those plane tickets. She's given up on Nigeria now. Jamaica is on her sights now. So, I am pretty sure before long, we'll see a shotgun wedding in Jamaica. tordenvaer
28. That's a Keith Morrison Situation....
How about the bride that pushed her new husband off a cliff on day 8?
When people noticed he wasn't around she notified the police. Then when they started searching for him and asking questions she sent an anonymous email from joe the plumber (from her parents computer) saying he is dead. Then when they still didn't stop investigating she led a search and rescue party directly to his body.
She said God led her to the spot. At the funeral she seemed relieved and guests heard her say she was glad that the police didn't have to be involved anymore. Eventually she made up a story about it being an accident. Finally she confesses to everything.
They hadn't even consummated the marriage. It's a trippy ride, but here's the link.FireInMyBones
27. A Terrible Disease....
He started using meth again after years of recovery. They were married for less than a year. Kinda sad really. He's in rehab now. AnEquatorialManiac
26. Third Times the Charm....
I don't know how long it took for them to actually get divorced. But my uncle found out his new wife had been cheating on him right as they left on their honeymoon cruise. His second wife was also a short marriage where she was cheating on him. He's been happily married to his third wife for 5 years or so now, so that's good at least. pwlocke13
25. 7 Days Down...
One week, a couple of friends seemed happily married.
Next thing I know, the wife has shared a pic of herself on the beach in a wedding dress being lofted by some goth-looking long-haired dude, her new groom. No idea. DarthContinent
24. Family ain't Free....
A friend of mine worked for her husband's brother (it's how they met). Once they got married her boss stopped paying her because she was family now and "you don't have to pay family." So she quit and found another job immediately without consulting her husband, and in a fury her husband changed all the locks while she was asleep in the back bedroom, and put deadbolts on the outside of the door, so she could only leave their house if he let her out, and took her cell phone. (they didn't have a landline).
It took her about 2 hours to get ahold of us online (dumb@ss didn't think she could contact people with a laptop), so we called the police who busted down the door and got her out. Husband went to prison, her divorce went through REAL quick, and now (5 years later) she lives on the coast and got engaged again to a very sweet guy who knows we're all watching like hawks. Manda-the-Panda
23. Kids ruin Everything!
Relative of mine got married and divorced 6 months later. Turns out they had never seriously discussed whether or not they wanted children prior to getting married. One adamantly wanted children and the other didn't and it drove them apart. They were together for 3 or 4 years before getting married and somehow never figured this out. Keebs-
22. The Photographer sees all....
Wedding photographer here.. Over 5 years, I know of 3 couples that are no longer together.
- One couple married in September, divorced by February
- One couple had been high school sweethearts, waited 10 years to get married, and the marriage from what I can see lasted less than a year.
- The other couple, the groom was drunk for the whole wedding, felt up his mother, and they used to post their photos all over FB and IG - now they're no longer to be seen, and the status of married is gone. punknkat
21. Jekyll & Hyde....
My little sister got married to "the love of her life" at 17. 2 months later she ran away and filed for divorce bc her 22 year old husband became an abusive drunk as soon as their marriage license was signed. TheElvenWitch777
20. She Cray. HIDE!!!
My boyfriends cousin.
She's 21 dating a 19 year old who looks 12 and is tiny. She's a very large woman. She's extremely physically abusive. I watched her pick this man up and lock him in the trunk of a car by sitting on top of it to induce a panic attack and win their argument at work.
He always has bruises and black eyes.
He proposes to her after a few months of dating, they get married. He annuls the marriage and leaves in secret the next day. Goes into hiding for 6 months. She posts lots of woe is me sappy break up stuff.
Somehow out of no where he's just back. They remarry at the court house and now she's saying she's pregnant but not telling her family. Her husband looks miserable and according to the grape vine doesn't work anymore and is confined to the apartment they share. Whether that's by choice or not is up for debate.
The poor guy looks like a withered husk of himself and he's only 19. RealAbstractSquidII
19. Animals Come First....
My uncle had married someone 3 months after dating them. He had 2 dachshunds and 2 cats. She demanded that he got rid of the dogs and got two new ones of her choice. They divorced in two weeks. biggestwigga
18. A Close Call....
Well, it wasn't really a divorce.
My brother married his girlfriend in Japan - Cinderella wedding at Disneyland and everything. Turns out she decided she was going to stay in Japan, despite them planning to move to Canada with him. Later he found out she never submitted the paperwork, so they were never married. HSteamy
17. The Big S...
Friend of mine was divorced and remarried in the same month. We all thought it was a little quick, but turns out they had been hot for each other for years. Anyway, a couple months after she got married, I saw her Facebook status changed to "separated." Don't know if they're still married or not. Dano420
16. Frowns....
Young couple in their late 20's, bride was the daughter of a friend. Daughter never learned to budget, save, spend wisely, pay bills on time, prioritize. They both worked full time at good jobs in San Francisco and lived in Pacific Heights in a purchased condo that was quite nice. She took them both into a ton of debt.
Had to have the very latest of everything that was material in nature, clothing, furniture, etc. She would put $1,000 on their credit card in an hour on absolutely nothing. She nagged her husband from the moment he walked in the door from work, even in front of company. It lasted two years. He couldn't get away fast enough. Her wedding photos were hilarious. No smiles. justusethatname
15. I Dare You!
About thirty minutes.
Bride told the groom in the run-up to the wedding, "Do NOT smash the cake in my face. Do NOT."
His buddies all got on him about being a wuss and showing her "Who's really in charge of this marriage..."
I was at the wedding, he smashed the cake in her face, she walked out of the reception and had it annulled. dramboxf
14. Hide the bank accounts....
Two weeks. Kind of a long story.
My sister was married to a real jacka**. She stayed too long and the divorce has been bitter. The ex husband is convinced my sister has a secret trust fund she is living off of and he wants half. There is no such trust fund. I mean, in what hopefully will be many years when my Dad dies, there may be money from his trust but he's very much alive, so he's not entitled to that.
So my sister hooked up with another guy who apparently is friends with the ex. The ex told him about the "trust fund" and somehow convinced my gullible sister to marry him, in the hopes that he would be more successful in getting the trust fund (the one that doesn't exist). This new husband, within days of marrying my sister brought his ex-girlfriend (baby mama who was supposedly in an abusive relationship) and his child to stay with them.
Very shortly after it was learned that new hubby has been with baby mama the entire duration of the relationship and the guy only went out with her because he thought she was a trust fund kid. So within a couple of weeks after the nuptials they were at each other's throats and he had thrown out and actually arrested and basically kept all her belongings. He filed a restraining order against so she couldn't come to the house.
I'm not saying my sister deserved this, but she does have a habit of stretching the truth. These guys didn't get the idea there was a trust fund from their butts. This marriage only basically lasted two weeks. gabberrella24
13. Overwhelming Grief....
It is very tragic, but dad was driving two of his boys home from a camping trip, and they got into an accident and the car went into the lake. Dad was able to rescue the oldest boy but he could not get the youngest out of his car seat in time. They were able to get the little one breathing but he had no brain activity and they had to pull the plug.
The marriage ended pretty much immediately. adairtd
12. What's Up Bill?
When I was in the Army, my ex-wife and I were good friends with a couple that lived a few doors down from us. One day i get home from work, and he's sitting on his front door step...I said "hey" he said "dude, you gotta come see this."
So I walked into his house, and it's empty. completely, not a scrap of paper...not a bag of trash. The weird thing was every cabinet door was open, refrigerator door open, every drawer open. If it was supposed to be closed, it was open.
He said the front door was wide open when he got home, and every faucet was turned on too. No note, nothing... his wife was just gone with everything in the house.
The thing was my ex-wife and I had dinner with them, in their house, the night before. laughing it up, drinking wine, having a great time... no sign of a thing wrong.
He said the first thing he did was call her parents house, and her father answered the phone... before he could even ask if he knew what was going on, the father said "Bill, you need to let it go" and hung up.
Remember that line from "True Lies" when Tom Arnold says his ex wife even took the ice cube trays...well, she took the ice cube trays. also took all of his uniforms and other clothes. He literally had the clothes on his back and what was in his pockets to his name. I never did find out what the motivator was, she was just gone. McFeely_Smackup
11. $800 is all...
My own marriage in 2004. Kissed my wife goodbye for a three month deployment to Pakistan in March. I never saw her again. After two months of being there she told me she wanted to leave me. At the time, there was a loophole in divorce law one website was exploiting. Quicksimpledivorce.com. Lawyers in Guam were allowed to process uncontested divorces pretty quickly.
Paid $800 and sent her the paperwork, we were living in Germany at the time and she signed and left for the US before I got home. The divorce was finalized in August of 2004.
What caused it? Dunno really, honestly she was unhappy prior to my departure. We had only been married a couple years, we kinda rushed to get married in 2002 when I got orders to Germany. sarzec
10. Punch Him!
Worked at a wedding venue and the bride told the groom who was from Arkansas that there was to be no call of the hogs during the wedding speech.
Groomsman proceeds to do it anyway, and the bride was furious and went into the back with the bridal party. Dude slapped her and said this crap is getting annulled tomorrow. Honestly she might have not dodged the slap, but she dodged a bullet. PuntingMuffCuts
9. The Life Suck.
The actual divorce has to wait because of visa issues, but basically they got married, everything was fine and then about a month later she got weirdly quiet about their relationships and about 9 months after the wedding he told her he thinks of her like a sister.
Holiday romance, long distance for several years, a ton of red flags and the second they moved in together things went to hell. Basically he didn't do crap around the home, she earned all the money and paid for all of his stuff on top of it, he then squandered her money even when she asked him not to (she actually had to put a limit on his phone contract). I don't think he planned to leech on her, he's just an inconsiderate a**hole. They're waiting it out because she's too nice to send him back. IncrediblePlatypus
8. Dirty Peter Pan...
One of my classmates in HS married her boyfriend before graduating college. She was one of those girls that had her entire life planned, so we were a little surprised that she didn't wait to graduate, but he was just about perfect so it made sense. He was intelligent, motivated, sweet, etc. He would come over to her house on weekends and mow her grass, do little repair jobs, take out the trash. Perfect courtship, beautiful proposal, a wedding that everyone talked about for weeks. 6 mo later we go out for a girls night and we beg for details on her wedded bliss, seeing as she's the first one married and she breaks down.
He had just stopped. Everything he had done before marriage just disappeared. It was like he was done adulting and reverted back to childhood. Wouldn't eat anything but spaghetti and chicken nuggets, literally. Started skipping class, cut his hours at work to less than half, didn't do any housework, any yardwork, would spend the entire night up with his best friend plating video games, to the point the friend complained. Drama intensified, and they were divorced before they hit their 1 year anniversary. Gruesomegiggles
7. Take your Space....
Good friend of mine got married. On their honeymoon husband tells her he needs space and isn't sure what he wants. Then he tells her he's leaving her for her best friend, who he's having an affair with. My friend is now blissfully happy and thriving and he's still a piece of garbage. visceraltides
6. Here is to 9 more!
My dad worked with a guy who had nine divorces under his belt, shortest lasting two weeks. They were dating for a week, got married, and divorced two weeks later. No one knows why. JalapenoBridger
5. No more Fireworks....
6 months. Both bride and groom were good friends of mine. Had the wedding at the most expensive yacht clubs in my state. Full Vera Wang tuxedos for all the groomsmen bought for us not rented. Had the wedding on July 4th weekend didn't last until the end of January. Rsmithjr1
4. Thank you Universe....
My boyfriend of on and off for 6 years started cheating on me with this girl in Texas (we lived in California). We broke up due to the cheating, a month or so later the girl moved in with him.
They got married on my birthday. Divorced 2 months later because they were both abusive to each other and she was cheating on him with his best friend.
Sometimes Karma is just so real. universalknowing
3. Immediate End!
My friend cheated on his wife AT THEIR WEDDING. She found out about half an hour after doing the paperwork and separation was immediate. looncraz
2. No Big Deal...
I knew a couple that did the whole "I don't know if I can make a commitment like getting married to you, but having two kids with you is nbd!" deal and after a couple years of it they tie the knot. A couple months later, her FB status is single. He was a massage therapist and had 3 girls on the side that he was meeting for their "night massages because she works all day and can't come in then." Beachy5313
1. Self Service Aisle....
Best man at my wedding was driving to his honeymoon with his new bride when she told him, "I don't think I want kids." This was after being together for years and claiming that she did want kids. Then as they pulled into a gas station she told him, "I don't think I want to be married."
He almost left her at the gas station.
After they got back from their honeymoon, she would stay out until 4 AM just about every night. No calls or texts, just wasn't coming home until very late.
They were divorced within six months of the wedding.
My wedding was not too long after his divorce was finalized. I told him very clearly that he was allowed to give a rambling Mosby-esque speech about how love was f---ed. He gave a very nice, funny speech instead. drewofdoom
Everyone has insecurities.
Be it speaking in public, wearing beach attire, or even one's profession, very few people don't have at least one topic of conversation that is bound to make them red in the face.
Some people are pretty adept at hiding their discomfort and can manage to persevere through their phobias with their dignity intact.
Others are not so lucky and often go to great lengths to hide their insecurities, only to make them even more apparent.
"What screams 'I’m insecure'?"
The Wisest People Are Those Always Willing To Learn
"When people are unable to admit that they don’t know something."- slimytoads
Other People's Success Are Not Your Failures
"Mocking someone else's achievement."- SuvenPan
Never Pick Yourself Up By Taking Others Down
"Belittling others."- Term-Haunting
"Always talking badly about others and trying to make them look weak/bad."- Pildith
Maybe Honesty Isn't Always The Best Policy...
"When you're quick to be 'brutally honest' with others, but have a meltdown when someone does it back to you."-eF240uKX52hp
Not As Funny As They Think...
"People who tear other people down as a joke but then get mad when they get it handed back to them."
"Clearly they either aren’t joking or are too sensitive to be dishing out sh*t."- babythrottlepop
Being On Top Adds More Possibilities Of Falling Down...
"Trying to one-up people in every conversation."- Flanky_Bwai
"One upping people in conversation."
"If I tell you I had a great trip to X place, I don’t need to hear about your better trip to someplace else that’s ostensibly 'better'."- I_Am_The_Grapevine
Some Things Speak For Themselves...
"Constantly saying what kind of person you are."
"If you were, you wouldn’t have to tell us."- ubereddit
A Little Contrition Goes A Long Way...
"Never apologizing."
"Making excuses and even twisting the facts but never apologize."- SuvenPan
But Enough About Me, What Do You Think Of Me?
"Constant projection and self-serving compliments."- nhabz
What Are They Even Trying To Prove?
"Revving your vehicle loudly every time you pass another person."- msnmck
Superior By Association
“'You will address me by my husband’s rank!'”- Psychological-Stay16
PDA Much?
"Elaborate Instagram and Facebook posts declaring love for one’s significant other over and over and over."- jbmaun
Always Needing Validation
"People who can’t think or feel anything without being told that it’s okay to do so."- Diesel07012012
It's sad that so many people think the only way to overcome something which makes them embarrassed or afraid is by embarrassing or demeaning others.
When being open and honest about your insecurities might, instead, result in your finding common ground with others.
And making new, lifelong friends in the process.
People Confess Which Things From Their Childhood They Thought Were Normal Until They Were An Adult
Every family has customs or traditions which are unique to them.
Be it all gathering together to watch The Muppet Christmas Carol every Christmas eve or an annual fried chicken picnic with dark and stormies every fourth of July. They are well aware not everyone does this, which makes it all the more special.
However, depending on the way it was introduced to them, some children are raised to think certain customs or habits done by their family are, indeed, normal.
Only to grow up and realize that theirs might have been the only family in the world which partook in them.
In some cases, this discovery is met with laughs and maybe the tiniest bit of embarrassment.
Other times, it's no laughing matter.
"What's something about your childhood that you thought was normal at the time but realiszd as an adult that it wasn't?"
Seemed Like A Good Idea, Until You Read Why...
"Having a cooler in the car."
"My parents always packed one, there were cokes and waters in it."
"The weird part was there was also always beer in it."
"Didn't matter if we were going 12 hours or 1 hour, they packed a cooler."
"Didn't realize how much my mom was drinking until years later when she become a non-functioning alcoholic."- IslandsOnTheCoast·
Dad Of The Year!
"When i was a kid I thought that all the Korean candy stores were free."
"Like you could go in, take what you wanted and leave."
"I would make friends with other Korean kids, take them to my favorite candy stores and tell them to help themselves. which they did."
"So apparently, whenever we'd visit my family in Korea, my dad would talk to all the candy shop owners in the neighborhood and tell them to put anything me or my friends took, on a tab."
"Maybe it was because i barely even spoke korean, but that whole situation just seemed perfectly f*ckin normal to my oblivious little self."- yaybunz
Boundaries Exist For A Reason
"In hind sight I realize that what I thought was 'freedom' was actually neglect."
"Kids aren't supposed to be left to themselves in such a degree that they end up raising themselves."
"From personal experience doing so leads to a lot of misunderstandings on how things are supposed to be."- Hattkake·
A Little Sensitivity Does Go A Long Way
"Being really sensitive to people's emotions because you never know if they could be in a bad mood."
"Turns out I learned that from my dad to make sure I don't make it worse."- UpstairsDifficult966
Think Carefully If You Have What It Takes To Be A Parent...
"Parents aren't supposed to make fun of their kids, complain about what they have to do for their children, and break down when they don't feel validated by their own child."- Doobledorf
"My mom never cooked, and there would be a lot of nights where I went without food because she didn't buy any."
"I thought it was normal for a mom to sleep the majority of the day."
"In reality she was always f*cked up on painkillers."
"Then, with my grandmother, she was controlling over whatever clothes, shoes, and how my hair looked."
"I always had to look like a good Christian boy."- Additional-Soup3853
Wait, what?
"I was in college before I learned that you don't have to get your mother a gift for your birthday because 'she's the one that did all the work that day'."- lylertila
Kind Of Sad To Think Self-Sufficiency Is So Rare...
"Being able to fix things myself."
"My dad is an engineer and throughout my childhood we'd come up with random creative projects to build stuff, he'd show me how to fix things and what safety precautions to look out for."
"Now if something happens at my flat I know how to fix it (or I call my dad and he'll guide me)."
"My boyfriend and friends have no idea how I know this stuff or how to do these things themselves, I always thank my Dad!"
"It's great because I get to save a lot of money, and I've saved money for my friends too!"
"Also, it means a lot to me because at the time and the town I was in girls weren't encouraged to do engineering, but my dad didn't care."
'I was little girl and thought it was essential for me to know how to do these things myself."
'I think he also hoped I'd one day become an engineer!"- imhere2913
Sadly, Not As Common As You Thiink...
"My parents were happily married and our home was happy and loving."- IllChampionship5
"Actually liking your parents/siblings/family."
"Almost everyone I know can't stand the people they grew up with, which I find strange."- ThatDukeGuy
Making A Custom Even More Meaningful
"Every Christmas my parents would buy me and my siblings one Christmas ornament to decorate the tree, which typically highlighted a special event or something important or a topic we were highly interested in that year."
"The tree started off rather bare at first, but after five kids and twenty-five years, that thing was filled from top to bottom, and shows a history of our lives."
"I thought it was how everyone decorated family home Christmas trees for awhile, but apparently it’s pretty unique to us."- RummelNation
Leading To A Massive Vocabulary No Doubt...
"Having a room full of dictionaries."
"I was baffled when I met kids in secondary school (as an adult doing a teacher training course at the time) who didn't even understand the basics of how to use one in their own language, let alone a two-language one."
"My dad was a translator so growing up it was just a normal thing, and I would sometimes just take one and look up random words in different languages for fun."- MrLuxarina
Unbelievable That This Isn't Normal
"Being taught to care about everybody, regardless of race, religion, or politics."
"We were lower middle-class farmers and we played with everyone."
"Everybody was welcome in my parents home."
"We had a ginormous garden and my parents gave our neighbors food out of it."
"My parents taught if you give out love, it’s returned 10 fold."
"Needless to say that bit us in the butt some times."
"But my parents died living and believing that."- SCGranny64
Not Exactly Normal, But Far too Commonplace
"When it would rain we would put pots and pans down to catch the drips."
'I would be sent to go have a slumber party with cousins whenever the electricity would get cut off due to nonpayment."
"I thought it was commonplace for people to go thru stuff like that."- RacksDiciprine
Ultimately, everyone's childhood is unique.
Many are grateful to learn just how unusual or special their childhood is.
For others, the discovery proves to be far too little too late.
Do you have something to add? Let us know in the comments.
It might be super easy to find the lyrics to a song now that we've all got the entirety of the internet in our pockets, but it didn't used to be so simple. Unless you owned the album, and it was one that actually came with the lyrics on the sleeve/in the case, you just kind of had to guess if the words were unclear.
This led to some extremely amusing, and sometimes mortifyingly embarrassing, misheard lyrics.
Redditor 23andrewb asked:
"What's the your favorite example of misheard lyrics?"
Purple Haze
"Jimi Hendix Purple Haze: ''scuse me while I kiss this guy'"
- Alone_Employment7914
"Roommate back in the day, who would have been about 18 in 1970, told me that Hendrix was aware of the alternate interpretation, and he would gesture at Noel Redding and say ''scuse me while I kiss this guy.'"
- corvid_booster
Bad Moon Rising
"CCR - bad mood rising 'There's a bathroom on the right.'"
- revs201
"That's what I thought as a kid. Still say it now because it's funny."
- br1zzle11
What A Wonderful World
"I see skies of blue And clouds of white The bright blessed day The dogs say goodnight"
- twoferrets
"I woke up my dog laughing at this one."
- UnfaithfulMilitant
"Did the dog say good night?"
- The_Orphanage_42
Why Is Everyone Singing About Lorain?
"I want to know, have you ever seen Lorain."
- Tolbitzironside
"I can see Clearly now, Lorain is gone!"
- AtheneSchmidt
"And I wonder, still I wonder. Who'll stop Lorain."
- legoman_86
"I can't stand Lorain, on my window..."
- Reindeer-Street
"As a child I used to sing 'I can see clearly now Lorraine has gone' and always wondered what poor Lorraine did that was so bad."
- PheonixKernow
Gimme The Beach Boys
"Give me The Beach Boys and free my soul, I wanna get lost in your Rock and Roll…"
- ChicagoSly
"Wait that’s not the actual lyric?"
- Guilty-Ad-2762
"Hahah. Nope! Beat Boys"
-ChicagoSly
Moves Like Jagger
"'remove my jacket' Instead of 'moves like jagger' Boy I felt dumb."
- wesleybg
"Moobs like Jagger."
- SheitelMacher
"I’ve got the moose vagina! I got that moose vagina! I got that moOose vagina"
- lilfrostgiant
Africa
"I guess it rains down in Africa?"
- walkingtalkingdread
"I’m still somewhat embarrassed to say that I thought it was 'god bless the maids down in Africa'. Thought it was some sort of weird political statement."
- StoopidTumbleweeds
"I wept the drains down in aaafrica isn't right then?"
- enava
"I always heard it as 'I miss the rains down in Africa' and thought that sounded so lovely and melancholic. I was so disappointed by the real lyric lmao"
- milkpen
Hit Me With Your Best Shot
"Hit me with a wet sock, FIRE AWAY!!!!!"
- SpaceTroutCat
Sweet Dreams
"Sweet dreams are made of cheese, who am i to disagree"
- __botulism__
"Can't argue that!"
- ATGF
Applause ... or Applesauce?
"When I was 14 my dad was driving me to my boyfriends house. On the way over “Applause” by Lady Gaga came on & my dad sang 'I live for the applesauce applesauce applesauce.' I busted out laughing and mocking him."
"Laughed so hard he turned the car around and took me home."
- Dependent_Border9912
Regulate
"Regulate - Nate Dogg + Warren G. "I can't believe, they're taking Lawrence Welk".
"I used to hear this song and wonder 'Why is a smooth Gangsta like Warren G listening to Lawrence Welk, and why are these thugs stealing his Lawrence Welk records specifically?'"
"Then someone corrected me. 'They're taking Warren's wealth.'"
- ConansMonorail
Here I Go Again
"Song: "Here I Go Again" by Whitesnake. Lyric: 'Like a drifter I was born to wear cologne'"
- Intensity_In10Cities
Tiny Dancer
"My favorite misheard lyric is 'Hold me closer, Tony Danza' instead of 'Hold me closer, tiny dancer' by Elton John."
- Queasy_Bus_9388
"Count the head lice on the highway."
- spavolka
Reelin' In The Years
"Steely Dan, instead of 'Are you reelin' in the years?', got 'Are you really into yeast?'"
- snitterisagooddog
"I always heard 'reelin' in the East' but like your version better, lol"
- FarNet2606
You Oughta Know
"'It's not fair, to deny me Of the crosseyed bear that you gave to me You, you, you oughta know' -Alanis Morissette"
"How could you take her crosseyed bear Dave Coulier"
- lindsasaurusreks
Have you ever embarrassingly misheard the lyrics to a song? How long did it take for you to realize, or for someone to correct you? Let us know in the comments.
All jobs are important. If they weren’t, those jobs wouldn’t exist.
However, some people view their profession as so important that they begin to develop a superiority complex.
This can be true for all professions, but Redditors maintain it’s more common in certain professions.
It all started when Redditor nameisMark asked:
“What profession attracts douchebags the most?”
Retail Snobs
“Clerks in high-end fashion boutiques. So snotty and pretentious, I mean...you work for them, you are NOT them. And most likely your clients are wealthier than you. Chill the f**k down.”
– Leocut78
“Some are fine but others act like youre the one who doesnt belong there. Like lol bruh you just work there. It's not like you can even afford anything inside. Which is no big deal but don't act like you're gatekeeping that store”
– watthekauloisthis
“Love the folks in high-end watch stores who have a huge ego about working at the mall and can’t afford a single product there.”
– Skydog57
"Salesmen."
"I remember when I bought my first house. COULD have bought one much sooner, but was just doing the young person thing of moving around for job promotions, etc. (Keep in mind, I was still only 29 when the below story happened.)"
"I was not/am not definitely not part of the generation that considered (outside of work) dressing down as wearing some khakis and a button up. Nope. I'll wear my sweats and a hoodie. Thanks."
"Anyway, I went to the furniture store closest (less than five minutes away) not because it seemed like the nicest place, but because it was close. A salesman asks "Can you afford anything in here?" The very stereotypical salesman - either in his 50s or aged terribly, probably weighed 2x-3x more than me, can tell he has 14 cents in his savings account - too. Not like some world-class salesman working on Wall Street."
"I wanted to tell him I had more money in my pocket than he has in his entire life, but I just turned around and walked away."
– 2020IsANightmare
The Clique Game
"Doctor here. Nearly half or more of my colleagues are a**holes"
– echophobos
"Medicine and the hospital environment is high school all over again, and the lounge is the cafeteria."
– ZombieDO
"The academic system they pass through to get to medical school does not reward good personality or balance."
– boredtxan
Please Don't Convince Me
"Any sales job. The competitive nature of the job means that the more confident and pushy you are, the more successful you are. It draws a certain personality type."
– Kazman2007
"Assumptive language is one of the most off-putting aspects of the dating world, imo. If I get the feeling you’re trying to sell me on going out/going home with you I definitely don’t want to."
– mypancreashatesme
Power Over The People
"Anybody in the criminal justice system. The amount of power they have over the general public or incarcerated individuals is horrifying and exploited far too often. These people also tend to adopt a gang mentality worse than the people they arrest"
"Speaking as someone who’s got incarcerated immediate family, 80% prison guards my family has dealt with are violent thugs and should be in prison themselves for the heinous things theyve done."
– SeraphimSpit
"I'm A Professional"
"Fitness trainers… particularly male ones. My f*cking god. I don’t know if it’s the steroids or testosterone but jesus christ."
– FizzyBeverage
"Honestly I’m a female persona trainer, but the first interview I had with a male fitness trainer was awful. He kept talking about how he basically knew everything there was to know in the fitness industry, which is ridiculous because it’s an ever evolving science. Anyway, if I’m generalizing I completely agree. Although I have met some extremely kind male fitness trainers as well."
– Lil_gumph
Necessary Technology
"Internet and Phone companies. (Rogers/Bell in Canada)"
– Full_Echo_3123
"THIS"
– redkat23
The Builders
"I don't know about most but I am starting to really not like civil engineers. My current pick."
– who_said_I_am_an_emu
Abuse Of Power
"bouncers. And I've never been in trouble with the law in my life or been in a fight etc but I've seen enough of them in action just being abusive power trippers and escalating situations needlessly. It's often akin to school yard bullying."
– billythepub
Money, Money, Money
"anything to do with money: bank, insurance ...etc"
– jenoworld
"How has no one said finance, my goodness."
– little_old_me_
Yikes!
"MLM's."
"Kimberly may be busy posting pictures of her "girl boss" mug while boasting about her ability to run her own company on her own time while being a super mom but I dont want her ugly leggings, crappy skincare or oil of oregano I can use to cure asthma, crowsfeet and the flu. Kimber is insufferable and I need to go to my real job that actually pays the bills."
– Solid-Question-3952
"I'm Your Biggest Fan"
"Paparazzi"
– SuvenPan
"This should be way higher. Paparazzi are scum."
– DisneyFoodie20
"Hey that’s not fair what did pizza ever do to you"
– Road_Warrior0711
What Happened To Beside Manner?
“Worked healthcare IT.
I've never met a surgeon that who wasn't putting literally every bit of effort they had into "The World's Biggest D-bag" contest.”
– KhaosElement
“I met one briefly who wore a big medallion, presumably by choice”
– PsychologicalTowel79
Yeah, I saw that coming!
Do you have any more to add? Let us know in the comments below.