Let's talk about people. But, specifically, "other" people. You know the ones. You're out with friends at a restaurant, trying to enjoy a relaxing evening together, then you hear them. Loud. Obnoxious. Everything they say is so important they have to talk with their hands. "Other" people.
Then, without warning, they say something so profoundly silly, so incredibly stupid, it sticks with you for the rest of your life and becomes a blot on your brain.
These are those times.
Reddit user, u/Nothing_here1, wanted to hear the dumber part of dumb & dumber when they asked for:
What's the dumbest thing you've ever heard?
...And Do The Math.
I used to work in a grocery store and this elderly woman said, "Twenty-five cents a pound? I can get them 4 pounds for a dollar at Safeway."
It's All A Government Conspiracy!
GiphyMy friend thinks that hibernation is a hoax because she's seen pictures of bears in the snow.
The first picture she showed me was of a polar bear.
Mum, Asking The Real Questions Over Here
my mum once asked if they had wind in canada...
Canadian here, can confirm we have wind
Wait?! Tattoos Are Needles?!
When I did tattoos, I had a guy come into the shop that wanted "Mr. 113" on his wrist. Not really all that out of the ordinary. We get it drawn up, my co worker placed it and she starts to do the tattoo. As soon as she starts, the guy screams in pain and jumps up.
"What the hell is in that thing?! Is there a needle in there?! That hurts!"
.... what?! This guy was in his 30s or 40s. How do you not know how tattoos are done?! He said, "I don't know. Just thought it was some permanent ink or something."
The guy went outside for almost an hour to smoke and I guess hype himself up. He got the outline done at least, but couldn't take the pain anymore and didn't get it filled. Still can't believe he didn't know tattoos were done with a needle michonne_impossibleAt Least He Answered Instead Of Laughing
My brother used to be a park ranger.
One time a lady asked him how long it took for a deer to become a moose.
He said about 7 years.
Are THEY Getting Enough Oxygen?
Oxygen doesn't come from trees, it comes from the air!
Did He Have An Opinion On Who Did It Better, Though?
Someone was convinced that Queen stole the bass line to "Under Pressure" from Vanilla Ice's "Ice Ice Baby". He wasn't even saying it as a joke.
His thought process was, that "Ice Ice Baby" is older because he heard the song before he had heard "Under Pressure" for the first time.
Causation Does Equal Correlation
My lecturer tried to tell the class that smoking was healthy because "my dad is a heavy smoker, and he's survived every heart attack he's had"
Do You Hear Yourself?
A few things;
"Hey Miss, how many chicken nuggets come in a 50 piece?"
"Ma'am, on my order. Do my sausage-egg McMuffins come with egg?"
"This is ridiculous! Why would I need to show you my ID? I'm just ordering a beer!"
I'm sure I'm missing a few but those three specifically stand out in my mind.
The 32nd Flavor Is Alcohol
My aunt told my mom that my brothers and I were drunk off of our ice cream cake on my birthday.
She was convinced there was enough alcohol in ice cream cake to get drunk.
Even With Maps?
My brother once adamantly told me that he believed New Zealand was right above Canada... as in connected by land.
It took me twenty minutes and MULTIPLE maps to convince him otherwise.
Just Start Saying "Not Old Mexico."
As a white male who lives in New Mexico, I constantly get asked stupid questions when I travel.
Including: Do you speak Spanish? Oh so you don't live in the United States? How was customs?
But You Hear Us Now, Right?
Fifth grade. My friend from Australia [is] visiting in South Africa and while he is sitting in class with me people ask what language is spoken in Aus.
He and myself say English.
We were then marked as liars who are trying to decieve everyone.
What Is It With The Need For Maps?
When I was in eighth grade Spanish class, our teacher decided to do some kind of location-place-landmark activity. We were shown a picture of a landmark and it's name, and the aim was to say which country and city it was from, in English and then in Spanish. A picture of a castle comes up and underneath it said "Edinburgh Castle".
Pretty obvious one right? Well, when the teacher asks which country it's from one girl raises her hand and says "London". The class is laughing now but when the teacher corrects her and tells her it is in fact Scotland, she says what I think is the dumbest thing I have ever heard in my life.
"Huh? I didn't know the Queen lived in Scotland."
That's Not...No?
One of my best friends fully believed that stretch marks were caused by wearing tight clothes.
It Goes Cold, Then Hot, Then Warm, Right?
My coworker once asked me how to make the water running from the dish washing sink's faucet "warmer". I looked at it, and it was so hot it was steaming. I asked her if she meant she wanted it colder? No, I want it warmer, so it's warm and not hot!
I reached over and turned on the cold water, then walked away.
We are the same age and she's a native English speaker.
A Math Lesson To Remember
GiphyA girls in math class didnt understand fractions. We got down to this because the teacher was explaining smething else pretty simple that she didnt understand. So broke it down and figured out she didnt get fractions. Well, thats a little odd but with a minute of explanation she should get it.
Nope. Teacher asked "what is larger, 1/2 or 1/3?" The girl said 3 is more than 2 so 1/3 is larger.
Teacher drew two circles on the board, divided one in two and the other in three parts. "Which is bigger?" Girl gave the same answer.
Teacher erazed both circles, grabbed two pieces of paper, ripped one in half, one in thirds. Held up a piece of both "Which one is larger?" Girl pointed out the 1/3 piece.
"Forget that there are more piece" and he binned the rest, holding up the initial two pieces again. "Just look at the size. Which one is larger?" Girl pointed out the smaller one again.
Defeated, teacher lowered his arms and walked back to his desk. "Please take no offense in this... but are you familiar with the words and concepts of "smaller and larger"?" He asked, as this class turned more sesamestreety by the second.
The girl said she did. Teacher pointed outside. "See those trees? Which is larger, right or left?" "Left", girl said and she was right. The left tree was about 5 metres taller. "Then which piece of paper is larger?" Holding them up again. Girl pointed out the smaller piece and the teacher walked out of the classroom.
*checks math notes
Me: "What weighs more; a pound of bricks or a pound of feathers?"
Coworker: "Bricks!"
It took me about 15 minutes to explain the answer to him, which included me drawing it out on paper and using a kitchen scale with different items for examples.
I drank so much that night.
What's the dumbest thing you've ever heard someone say? Share it with us!
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.