Rumors are usually not smart to begin with. Making up a story about someone and then spreading that juicy bit of gossip-people can only get so creative with lies.
Sometimes it's straight up so dumb that why bother to correct them? Surely anybody with half a brain could see through these.
And yet...
u/coolkitty1654 asked:
What was the dumbest rumour spread about you?
Here were those stories.
Life Saved
That I was dead. Was late getting back to uni so my 'buddies' decided it'd be funny to tell people I'd been killed in Europe. The story started with 'killed in an accident' and blossomed to 'got a girl pregnant, wouldn't marry her, decided to marry her, killed in an accident'.
One girl I knew actually believed it and cried when we bumped into each other. Had no idea she cared.
At Least The Principal Didn't Believe It
That my parents were drug dealers, and they involved me in selling drugs at my elementary school.
What actually happened was that I gave my friends a dollar each from my lunch money so we could all buy cookies. Somehow the rumor spread all the way to the principal, so he dragged me to his office and lectured me about not giving my money away in front of other people.
Now Maybe They'd Believe It
I was once sick for an entire week of 9th grade. Somehow it spread that I went to Hawaii. Even a teacher made a comment. I have no idea how the heck that started and nobody would tell me why they thought it because they thought i was just being cheeky by denying it
I Was Always Scottish
I moved from Scotland to England at like 13, I had a thick accent and I got a lot of flack for it so almost subconsciously I slowly started to like fake an English accent, was really stupid as I'd flip back to Scottish as soon as I got home..
After I left school I dropped the accent but by that time the majority of people I knew in the small town I was in, had met me as English Spliffwizard so when I'd see people they'd be like wtf happened to you!? Why are you suddenly Scottish!? I used to just make things up like "I had a voice transplant an' this is all they had" but eventually it stopped.
Roll on a few years and I'm back in town havin' a drink with some mates, I get talking to 2 guys and when I mention my name one is like "oh you're that guy who pretends to be Scottish" and so now apparently there's a fable around the town of some English kid who one day was just like I'm Scottish now.... and the kid is me. Class
Pure Evil, Perhaps?
This was spread by an adult in a volunteer organization I was part of. Me, happily married, running for a leadership position. Her, many years married to someone running for one of the other positions. Apparently she didn't want me on the leadership team because she told people I had the hots for her husband? Who was, bless his heart, a nice guy, but homely.
I respected what he'd done to achieve leadership in the organization, but could not have been more uninterested in that aspect of him if he had been a cow pattie. I didn't know anything about this until after I lost the election. She also started a rumor about two other adults who were friendly, but not doing anything untoward.
Unfortunately the wife of the man believed that rumor and it totally ruined a number of relationships and events because she wouldn't permit them to attend the same meeting or event. I never understood what motivated that person to spread those types of rumors.
Whoopsie
When I was in grade one some girls thought it would be funny to tell everyone I had 'boy private parts' which upset me greatly. I don't remember this but my mother has told me that during an assembly I was talking with the people around me and it was brought up and I felt the need to stand up and pull down my pants and undies in front of everyone. I cringe every time I think about it.
Community Service
When I was 21 and in college, I worked with a boy who was a senior in high school. His girlfriend broke up with him about two weeks before prom for another guy. I offered to go with him. The girl was dumped by her new boyfriend a few days before prom and wanted my coworker to take her to prom, but he said no, as he was going with an 'older woman.'
At prom, I was quite the topic of conversation. This girl had come by our store when I was working, and she and her friend told everyone I was a wench who had multiple children with multiple baby daddies.
I don't even go here! Anyway, prom was nice, dinner before was great, and after the dance I went home (alone) and had many legal drinks in my child free house.
I'm Here, Though
In middle school some sub that no one knew that looked like a narc pulled me from class because of a family issue, walked me out of the school to my mom. Somehow this turned into the sub being a cop, and it being a cop car, and I was in trouble for something. One rumor a few weeks later was that I had gotten in trouble for bringing tons of huge guns to school or something. I was like guys, I'm still at school, I told you what happened....
This Is What We Call Attempted Murder
It wasn't mine, but my friend is allergic to peanuts and someone started a rumor that he was lying. So, someone waved a peanut butter sandwich in front of him. That started a allergic reaction. We were in 5th grade.
Ah, We Love Racism
In middle school someone started a rumour that I was a voodoo priestess (stereotypical Hollywood voodoo, nothing like the real thing). I'm white and live in Canada. People believed it, they'd shriek and run when they saw me, at the end of one year a girl who had been nothing but awful to me asked if she could sign my yearbook and her signature was basically her pleading with me not to curse her.
Even in my first year of high school I had a few people who didn't go to my middle school walk up and ask me if it was true that I did voodoo. Thankfully it died down after that.
Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "
" to +1 (310) 299-9390 to talk to him about it.
There's something seeing a person litter that drives me up the wall. I remember being a kid and being explicitly told to hold on to my trash and not just throw it in the street. As a kid, I distinctly remember being made fun of for not just throwing the bag of chips I'd just eaten or an empty soda bottle into the gutter.
I can't imagine doing that. Why?! We truly treat this planet as if we have somewhere else to go.
After Redditor pnrddt asked the online community, "What small action immediately makes you dislike a stranger?" people shared their observations.
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"Playing music..."
<p>Playing music or having a 'private' conversation via speaker phone in a public place.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginci58?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">LLCoolBrap</a></p><!-- Insticator API Fire Widget -->
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"When they exhibit..."
<p><strong></strong>When they exhibit a personality trait that I also have, and don't like about myself. Every time I find myself being dismissive or judgemental of somebody, it's just my own insecurity.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginn0g5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginn0g5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">iotangle42</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_2" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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"When I'm talking..."
<p>When I'm talking and they are not listening. Like they are not even trying to pretend that they are listening.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gincjto?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">eat-the-rich-07</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_3" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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"Because one of these days..."
<p>A person can treat me like a princess but as soon as I see them mistreating either animals or people, I am out of there. Because one of these days, you'll be on that receiving end.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginpr97?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">starlightradio</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_4" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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"It just screams..."
<p>Telling people to smile. It just screams condescending and a lack of emotional intelligence.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginovsj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginovsj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">3FoolsinaTrenchcoat</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_5" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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"When I hear that..."
<p>Grown ups using "baby talk" to try to get what they want. I'm not talking about when people goo-goo at babies, but when they use a silly whiney voice to try to persuade people or make people do them a favour.</p><p>"Aww, pwease hewp me wiv dis wittle pwoject."</p><p>When I hear that I instantly lose respect for that person, be it a stranger or someone I know.</p><p>Pet peeve.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginbwb4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">handsahwill</a></p>"Okay, we get it..."
<p>One-upping people. "Yeah, that's pretty good, but one time I..." Okay, we get it, your life is more amazing than everyone else's.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginhrkd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">well-uh-yeah</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_6" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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"When out driving..."
<p><strong></strong><strong></strong>When out driving, someone who pulls out in front of you, then proceeds to go 5-10+ mph under the speed limit.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gingjuj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gingjuj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">FuzzMcBeefy84</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_7" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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"If you don't..."
<p>Talking negatively about anyone who's just trying to have a good time in a fun setting. If you don't have nice to say shut the hell up.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gio4vf5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">intergLACTIC</a></p><div data-conversation-spotlight style="min-height:90px"></div>
"When people..."
<p>When people put other people down to try and make themselves look better. "Oh I'm just playing around with them we're friends." I don't care quit being an @ss you know what you're doing and you should be able to tell you're making them feel bad.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gio9p3c?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">inf303</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_8" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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"If it's into a drain..."
<p>Spitting on the pavement.</p><p>If it's into a drain, that's fair enough, sometimes you get phlegm and you need to get rid of it. Going for a drain shows you're at least considerate of other, imo. But on the floor where anyone can step in it (or if you're in a wheelchair, get it all over your hands from pushing the wheels) is just gross.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginojq3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ghostmadlittlemiss</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_9" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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When you're in the market for a slew of very specific facts that all fall under the same general theme, the internet really delivers.
Forget streamlined public health capabilities and revolutionized human communication, the true beauty of the internet is all the random, barely useful information you can find when a bunch odd people decide to assemble and swap info.
<p>A recent Reddit thread centered around one theme in particular: the weirdest things about the human body. </p><p>Doctors were asked to weigh in, but unsurprisingly most of the contributors were non-doctors who read something weird one time. </p><p>But that was probably a blessing for the thread. After all, some of these bizarre facts are real doozies. </p><p>bitictac asked, <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">"Doctors of reddit, what’s the weirdest/grossest fact about the human body that no one seems to know?"</a></p>
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Homemade TarantulaÂ
<p>"Dental student here. Black hairy tongue is a common condition and it's exactly what it sounds like." </p><p>"It's just caused by buildup of dead skin that becomes hair like because of tobacco use or antibiotic use. Usually combined with lack of frictional forces from brushing"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu9tdq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Alarm-Potential</a></p><!-- Insticator API Fire Widget -->
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Load Em UpÂ
<p>"When a patient gets a kidney transplant, they usually leave the old 2 behind unless there's a significant problem with them."</p><p>"The extra kidney is just tucked in the peritoneum leaving the patient with 3 kidneys."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu6qjd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">MedicalJargon-itis</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_2" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Come On Mutations!
<p>"Every single melanocyte on your skin (you know, the ones that give your hairs color, and your skin its skin color) is connected to your sympathetic nervous system via modified synapses."</p><p>"No-one knows why they're connected that way - but we do know that under stress, those nerves nuke the pool of stem cells that create hair pigment, which is why it makes you go grey."</p><p>"A few mutations and you could theoretically be able to control them and change color like a chameleon."</p><p>"So in many ways, we're basically walking cuttlefish."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuyo29?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">PavlovaPalava</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_3" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Play the Long Game, PeopleÂ
<p>"Humans can outpace any animal on the planet."</p><p>"No, we're not the fastest, but if we were chasing the fastest animal (cheetah) we would catch it and be able to keep going."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gisujdr?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Bout3Fidy</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_4" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Little Helpful CrittersÂ
<p>"There are little microscopic organisms living in your eyebrows, eating away at the dead skin."</p><p>"Don't freak out, they are very helpful and completely harmless, just a little gross"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giud33u?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Vid-Me-BossCheesburg</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_5" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Thankfully That Filter is a Pretty Good OneÂ
<p>"Saliva is filtered blood. Your tears are too. And if you're too stressed out you can cry blood."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gitshe5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">mylifeisathrowaway10</a></p>Imagine It All in a BottleÂ
<p>"I know that the average human churns out between 1 and 2 liters of saliva every day.... oh and we have parasites who are embedded in our hair follicles, and they eat away at our skin, thus causing Dandruff :,)"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gisrxcc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Throwawayyy123451</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_6" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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So HotÂ
<p>"Humans give off so much body heat that in 30 min we can boil a gallon of water" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu1ngt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Financial-Ad-6050</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu1ngt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Rookie numbers" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuvqqt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">nopenothappening</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Pshh I can get a gallon of water boiling in like 10 minutes tops" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuhji3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ridiculouslygay</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_7" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Oh DearÂ
<p>"Old ladies often have prolapse of their pelvic organs. This means their vaginal walls got so weak that it can no longer support their bladder or uterus."</p><p> -Nurse practitioner"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gitopxb?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">vespertinas</a></p><div data-conversation-spotlight style="min-height:90px"></div>
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Image by Alterio Felines from Pixabay
Working in a doctor's office means helping people when they're at their lowest. Sometimes, that leads to wonderful moments when the patient is thankful for all the advice and care you provided. Other times, it means taking something out of someone's bum.
Turns out, that second one happens a lot more than you might think.
<p>Reddit user, <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/XxFireflyxxX/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">u/XxFireflyxxX</a>, wanted to hear about:</p><p><em><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/" target="_blank">ER doctors and nurses of reddit, what is the dumbest cause of injury you've ever seen?</a></em></p>
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For Fashion And Protection
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDMwOC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY1MjkwNTU2OX0.6D-LIQ26JXH0-7OtPpG93HOtt41wAv62bGHMVvuAYpk/img.gif?width=980" id="7ff06" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="6109fb5baf04f17deade8b58695881d1" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />wound up season 3 GIFGiphy<p>I had a patient come in with lacerations to her fingers. Her blender got clogged and she stuck her hand inside to clear it. She cleared it and the blender resumed....um blending. Luckily, she had long acrylic nails. This helped lessen the impact.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitz5l4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">Bornagainchola</a></p><!-- Insticator API Fire Widget -->
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I'd Rather Go To Sleep
<p>Guy came in after being concerned the bed sheet had stuck to his lower leg. Turns out hed been using a petrol mower the evening before and it had exploded. Full thickness burn to his calf. No pain. He wanted to go home to feed his cows instead of being transferred to burns and plastics. Man it looked like white leather.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitkqf9?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">DamaskRoses</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_2" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Why Play Typical Catch?
<p>Guy was camping with his frat buddies and they were firing air rifles at each other with a baseball glove on.</p><p>The pellet was lodged well into his hand. Like, how did you think this was going to end?</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitq7lt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">Milesofstyle</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_3" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Close Eyes Off From The World
<p>I was in the ER as a patient next to a guy who was brought in via ambulance because he super glued his eye lids shut.</p><p>He was high as a kite, but so was I from the pain meds I'd been given for my own injury. Whatever meds I was given made me think everything was hilarious. I got yelled at by the nurses for laughing hysterically in the next room. He was being a pain in the a--, ER was on diversion already, and they were not amused.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/githxnc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">brubarbal</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_4" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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That's Why It's Called A "Dog" Toy
<p>A few stand out. Person somehow swallowed a spiked dog toy.</p><p>Someone tried to reverse his circumcision by cutting more of his d-ck off with a pair of scissors.</p><p>About every object known to man up the bum. 🎵 if you like it then you shoulda put a string on it." 🎵</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitnt24?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">bsn2fnp1</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_5" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Yeah, But, How?
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDMxMi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0MjAyNTM0OX0.Esaobyl7Yq7QltSxli0ZwjggE7j8A4gu0uNRnn1ZwUc/img.gif?width=980" id="95a28" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="f4eb7f0131c0d79db2de93fd2bbdc0af" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />homer simpson GIFGiphy<p>I've seen an internal vaginal laceration from someone climbing a fence while trying to see something happening down the street.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/giss2id?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">midturbinate</a></p>Again With The Butt...
<p>ER Nurse here</p><p>-We had a girl come in and who knows what she was doing but she had one of the thin glow sticks in her bladder, maybe some fun finger/glow play during a concert? I don't know but pretty wild.</p><ul><li>Also I had a Spanish speaking only gentleman explain why a shoe polish bottle was in his bum, we had to use a video interpreter due to the language barrier but it's was pretty wild to hear the interpreter say "I have a bottle of polish in my anus" after expecting him to just explain why he had belly pain. We also proceeded to print out multiple pictures of common types of shoe polish he used to ask him if it was "this one or that one". It was hilarious when he identified what one it was based on the picture, he had to go to the OR</li></ul><div><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitqmlm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">AirFryersRule</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitqmlm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"></a></div><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_6" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Sounds Like A College Guy Thing To Do
<p>Had a university student who ignited a firework in his anus while drunk for the amusement of his buddies. It exploded, causing full thickness burns of his rectum, resulting in him needing a colostomy</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/giss6l1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">ArcofRiolan</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_7" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Wow...
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDI4OC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzMDMyMzMyMn0.b42VhIpJrAsaFR19Cf55ZVkWnby5yTIrMhI73HVAImk/img.gif?width=980" id="3ccdf" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="50847094a4e17c16febbb35d2146f14f" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />scared homer simpson GIFGiphy<p>Operating theatre - this woman came in with a frozen chicken stuck inside her lady parts. Apparently she had a habit of buying them, inserting them and then pulling them out, as she really had a thing for going through childbirth, but on this occasion, she hadn't allowed time for it to defrost properly /adequately.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Mike_OxonFaier/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Mike_OxonFaier</a></p><p><em>Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter <a href="https://mailchi.mp/knowable/knowable-newsletter-in-content" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">here</a>. </em></p><div data-conversation-spotlight style="min-height:90px"></div>
Keep reading...
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Image by Sammy-Williams from Pixabay
I love movies. The cinema has long been a savior of mine and has given me some of my greatest inspirations. But being an avid film watcher has also made me quite the critic. I can always tell when a movie is worth the money to see in theaters or wait until it's on basic cable with commercials. The signs of mediocrity abound, and sometimes they aren't that difficult to spot.
Redditor u/fjv08kl wanted to know what is obvious about mediocre cinema by asking.... What are some subtle 'red flags' that tell you a movie is not worth watching?<div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_1"></div>
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5 Star Crap
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDI3NS9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYxMTQyODI1N30.qKLu7rVINVJrjgXw_RvmeZ07WB--ybYKVcE1oz5YBSs/img.gif?width=980" id="4563c" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="016837a2b79d26d09f8d6f0b69e9feb5" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />Sick Schitts Creek GIF by CBCGiphy<p>"Critics are calling it 'laugh-out-loud funny!'"</p><p>It's almost always garbage. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giuiscq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">an_ineffable_plan</a><span></span></p><!-- Insticator API Fire Widget -->
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Good Phrases
<p>If the trailer has blurbs from reviews, check to see who wrote each review. On bad movies, they will often put multiple blurbs from the same review. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giufjra?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Tricky4279</a><span></span></p><p>And quote phrases that can easily be taken out of context. That "...laugh out loud" in the trailer was actually taken from the quote "This movie was so painfully unfunny that I didn't laugh out loud even once." </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giwozee?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">bearlybreeding</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_2" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Merits...
<p>Them desperately pointing out the director/producers/writers/studios better movies and productions that barely relate to the movie's themes in an attempt to lure in fans. To me it always meant the movie doesn't stand out enough to stand on its own. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giukhjg?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"> Illier1</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Illier1/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer"></a><span></span></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_3" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Sing Out
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDI4Ny9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY2ODc3Mjg3NX0.PqLcrCbJQWjnOq2qjDYgljgKTS1tNiemieiJknAY5BA/img.gif?width=980" id="e7fa0" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="b001b797c886eca75f7c3fe4df87f809" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />pitch perfect singing GIFGiphy<p>A movie has a popular song with different lyrics. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giu7bw0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Da_Budster</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_4" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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Bad Blitz....
<p>They push the ads way too hard on TV and reddit. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giu5eto?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">LasVegasLoner147</a></p><p>If a studio knows a movie is bad they will use an ad blitz to get as many people to go opening weekend as possible before the word of mouth has a chance to sink them. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giw5ee3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">jwc905</a></p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giw5ee3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer"></a>Can't prove this empirically, but to me the logic has always been:</p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_5" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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<ol><li>Larger the advertisement budget, the larger the revenue it needs to pull in to justify the cost</li><li>The larger the "revenue requirement" the more the movie will cater to wider ranges of audiences (more people = more tickets = more revenue)</li><li>The more people that a movie must appeal to, means it must dumb things down or take less risks because you will be catering to a lower denominator overall</li></ol><p>So yeah, that's kind of my thinking on it. If you don't have a target demographic or a specific genre you're really tying to nail, you instead just water the whole product down and get a typical "blockbuster" formula movie instead. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/gix3jy2?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Willster328</a></p>
Too Much too Soon
<p>When you feel the preview showed basically the whole movie. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giu58fh?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">dklein15</a></p><p>This. And also when it's obvious that the dialogue in the preview was put into the movie for the sole purpose of making the preview interesting. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giunkmd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">pokey1984</a></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_6" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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The Raves...
<p>If in the commercial the people who are "raving" about it aren't anyone reputable. Susan on Twitter said it was the best movie she saw in 2020. Susan didn't have many options in 2020, her standards were lower. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giuaovx?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Sea_Somewhere2297</a></p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giuaovx?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer"></a><span></span>This applies to games way too often too.</p><p>"Game of the year award!" <em>randomasswebsite.com.... </em></p><p><em><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giunv4b?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">_Bob_A_Feet_</a></em></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_7" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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The Star
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDI4MS9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY1Mzc1NzkzMX0.hAc2HW8-qxafmLGA5cUJQggDwYGmcyWVilQYmJnZxlE/img.gif?width=980" id="05328" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="bb3c4cbbb57d47f9695aa0b3f4041242" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />mariah carey hello GIFGiphy<p>It's clearly just a "star vehicle." Like, all the hype is about the star's riveting new performance... but no corresponding critical praise for the story, directing, special effects, nothing. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giu7pe0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">UtopiaForest</a><span></span></p><div data-conversation-spotlight style="min-height:90px"></div>
'Tis the Season....
<p>Release date. The only movies that go into wide release in January or February are:</p><ul><li>Oscar bait that got limited releases in December in NY/LA to qualify for the Oscars</li><li>A romance or two the Friday before Valentine's Day</li><li>Crap that the distributors are assuming will bomb that they dump onto the screens in midwinter.</li></ul><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_8" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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<p>Hollywood insiders even refer to the first two months of the year as "Dumpuary." Every so often a Dumpuary release will succeed (Get Out and Deadpool are recent examples), but by and large it's garbage they're hoping to squeeze something/anything out of.</p>
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<p>Late March/early April and August/September also tend to be weaker fare. If it was really good, the studios would save them for summer blockbuster season (May-July) or award-giving season (October to mid-December). There are exceptions, but again, they're exceptions. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giusvr2?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">RayAnselmo</a></p>
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"O"
<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDI5Mi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY2MTA0NjY4Nn0.XJbs6K8qkvlKfoRmLY0ndY3WDWLo-jO0QOiDW9H8DE4/img.gif?width=980" id="5e2b0" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="65cab9febdbbba1a639bd339f08ab95d" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />Will Smith What GIF by DraftKingsGiphy<p>If any of the actors have an overly expressive "O" face on the films poster. </p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuud2s/what_are_some_subtle_red_flags_that_tell_you_a/giuicac?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">kandren</a><span></span></p><div class="ad-tag" data-ad-name="In_Content_Responsive_10" style="min-height:280px"></div>
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