Pulling back the curtain isn't always a great idea. Just ask the curious cat. Oh wait you can't... they're dead. Sometimes secrets are the integral part in making the magic. Many professions withhold truth from the public. Now somethings we might be better off knowing, but then the status quo will never be the same. Do we really want to know how the donuts are made?
Redditor u/CircleBox2 was wondering who felt like shedding some light on a few things we as the people are in the dark about by asking.... What's a dark secret/questionable practice in your profession which we regular folks would know nothing about?
Jeweled.heating up hot stuff GIF by Bunim/Murray Productions Giphy
Pretty much ALL the high-end handmade in Australia jewelry in Australia is made at a secret factory in Bali. All the clients have to show an established business and sign confidentiality agreements.
There is a problem in substance abuse treatment in the United States called body brokering. Substance abuse treatment can be very expensive and insurance companies pay A LOT of money for a patient to be there. Treatment centers will hire "body brokers" to find addicts with the best, highest paying insurance and entice them to check in to the specific center, the treatment center then gives the broker a commission from the insurance money.
This can go as far as body brokers literally putting more drugs in to the hands of some addicts before they come in, bc the higher level of drugs in your system upon admit, the more and longer the insurance company will pay to the treatment center.
Brokers will also hire other addicts in a pyramid scheme type way to check in to the treatment center, make friends with the other patients, and upon discharge encourage relapse so they come back to treatment.
Have you ever started filling out a form for a quote on something (insurance website, or literally anything) and then changed your mind and said "nah, I don't want to give them my personal information", and then abandoned the form before pressing "submit"?
If you think that stopped them from getting your personal information, it didn't. Most companies looking to capture leads will capture your info in real time as you enter it into a form. The submit button is just there to move you to the next step, not to actually send your information to the company.
The Honor System.Role Playing Reaction GIF by Hyper RPG Giphy
Customs broker here. Every day hundreds of thousands of containers and air shipments arrive into United States territory. The volume of customs entries entered every day is staggering. When we get licensed to be a customs broker we are trained and tested not just on knowledge, but ethics. We even take a pledge to partner with CBP to uphold the law, and cooperate with them should we come across anything suspicious. Why so much emphasis on this?
Customs can't actually screen everything coming in. I'm oversimplifying but CBP basically works on the honor system. You file an entry saying what the shipment is, and they just take your word for it and release it. This happens hundreds of thousands of times a day. Maybe at best customs can screen 3-7% of what's coming in, the rest of just waived through.
You know the people who write instruction manuals or user guides in things you buy?
Half the time, they've never even seen or touched the product. Some dude just sends us pictures, a rough description of how it's supposed to work, and that's it.
ETA: Wow this took off. To all the IT dudes of reddit. I actually browse the brand specific subreddits to figure out what to add to my user guides because that's how little info my company provides me. Thanks for making my life easier!
I work on on a popular teen TV show. All the lead actors do cocaine regularly and they often come to set high or show up to set late because they chose to party on a Monday night.
People always complain that Disney (in example) always hires old as hell people for their roles, I mean would you hire a teenager for a show that might either have a pilot and one season or maybe run for years if it's successful? I mean, would you really? You don't remember when you were a teenager all the stupid crap you did? Now add fame and income.
At a very large pizza chain restaurant that remains widely popular, we had these perforated pans for thin crust and stuffed crust pizzas. They'd get washed in the dish washer by the hundreds per day and at least half would still have burnt cheese on them. Well they were just stacked to dry.
When making new pizzas in those pans, sometimes the pans that were left to "dry" overnight grew bits of mold around the burnt cheese. We were told just to put the dough on top because otherwise we'd never keep up with the orders if we rewashed everything. The manager said, "don't worry, it gets cooked."
Buttless....all star baseball GIF by Lansing Lugnuts Giphy
Minor League Baseball (all minor league sports?): the attendances figures are bullcrap.
And I don't just mean "they announce tickets sold instead of butts in seats." No, they just make it up. Teams purposely inflate attendance figures to attract sponsors. ThatUncertainFeeling
If it has to be accessed regularly in an IT setting? It's not secure. Not unless you're in an industry that actually polices it.
Yes, people are dumb enough to pick up USB thumb drives they find on the ground. The nicer and newer it is, the more likely it'll get plugged in.
Also, if you're looking to verify the security of your vendors, don't announce your visit.
Ghostedtake notes GIF Giphy
Not currently my profession but ghost writers in fiction. John Grisham, Danielle Steele, James Patterson, Janet Evanovich etc., all those big names with an NYT bestseller every year use ghostwriters who are are never credited or mentioned. It's barely even a secret.
"There's a big difference..."
Whether it be due to being extremely busy, not caring, not knowing, or the "correct" way just being so damn impractical....you'd be shocked how many corners are cut in every part of the healthcare system. There's a big difference between how nursing/medicine is taught vs how it's practiced.
"Only a few..."
As an exotic dancer; we talk about you in the back. And we laugh and make fun of you. Only a few customers get any kind of praise. Those are the ones who listen to our rules and tip well.
"In the auto industry..."
In the auto industry, mechanics are paid for how long it takes to complete a repair. Makes sense, right? Except that at dealerships, the auto brand has determined how much time can be charged for a given job; so if the tech does it in less, they get paid for the full time and the customer gets charged for the full time - no matter how much time it actually took.
Let's say a simple headlight bulb change. Pop the access cover, take the old bulb out, throw the new one in, turn it on and off to make sure it works. Takes two minutes. But the customer gets charged for thirty, because apparently that job is worth 0.5 hours.
It seems pretty insidious to me.
It's possible that this is commonly known, but in America pet food that has expired is legally required to be thrown out. Dry and canned pet food of course can last for months after expiration and be perfectly safe. So not only is it not donated to animal shelters, most pet stores actually tear open the bags and open the cans so that dumpster divers can't use the food for their animals. When I was homeless and had a dog I tried to find stores that didn't open the containers they threw out. I was usually not successful.
Obviously the same thing is done with human food, but I've heard in some places the laws are changing for that and they are allowing stores to donate semi expired food to food pantries. I go to food pantries myself often and I'm grateful for this slow but hopefully steady change and how we handle food "waste". The USDA says approximately 12% of all Americans are food insecure, which means they may not know where their next meal is coming from. About a third of all food produced in America goes uneaten which is something like a hundred and sixty billion dollars. Sometimes it all just makes me want to cry.
The insurance industry, at the corporate level, is all about wining and dining the consultants of huge companies that do nothing but act as a middle man between companies looking for insurance and the companies selling insurance. I've seen THOUSANDS spent on getting the opportunity to bid on a contract. No wonder health insurance is so expensive. The money spent is enough to stock a soup kitchen for years.
"I give the worst deals..."
I give the worst deals/worst service to rude guests, and upgrades/vouchers for free food/special discounts to nice people who don't yell at me when something goes wrong with their rooms.
"I've been working..."
I've been working at a Safeway grocery store for a while now and I am on the "sanitation team" because of the coronavirus. This consists of me holding a rag and a spray bottle and mindlessly spraying and wiping the entire store for 8 hours a day. And because of an apparent cleaning supplies shortage, we had to use the same rag all day for everything. Cleaning toilets, sinks, and then the conveyor belts, self check out stations, and everywhere you touch and set your groceries in the front!
"Most general duty officers..."
Police officer in Canada.
Most general duty officers despise doing traffic, and they will not write tickets if they can avoid it. They love warnings because you can't dispute a warning, and there's no chance of court. Many don't know the elements of mundane-seeming offences, and would have a hard time giving evidence in court. If they're going to write tickets, they'll write for administrative violations that can't readily be disputed (no insurance, expired drivers licence, etc) and give you a "break" on the actual driving offences.
But god help you if a traffic unit gets you.
"As much as it's discouraged..."
As much as it's discouraged, most teachers talk/complain/laugh about their students and their families in the staff room.
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"People die everyday..."
People die everyday because of doctors' handwriting and wrongly prescribed drugs. And yet I rarely hear any doctor go to jail because of it.
Also, if doctors make mistakes, they would devise a narrative that removes the blame from themselves, and pin the blame instead on nurses, residents, etc. And usually, patients wouldn't even realize this because doctors are so good at hiding their mistakes.
I'm not sure how dark it really is but as a network admin, if your company has an email server, we read them. Ethically it's a gray area without a good reason but legally we are 100% allowed to do it and a lot of us probably do, just for fun. So just never send anything personal from your work email.
"I've learned this practice..."
The Netherlands. But this counts for a lot of the EU.
For us it is common practice that the grave diggers are also the people escorting the casket. Many gravesites here use sand with a top layer of about 30cm of dirt as it helps the rotting process and the gravesites are mostly constructed artificially with a big layer of sand with dirt in top.
We don't add extra sand, we use the sand that already was there, the entire graveyard is build on a big layer of sand. Again this is common practice to help the natural process.
We have to stand on the coffin to get in the grave to remove the chains and remove the iron sheds preventing the grave to collapse. There simply is no other way. But when we fill a grave the family is never present.
Our cemetery doesn't have a crematorium so I wouldn't know about that.
I've learned this practice with our national education for grave yard employees and spoke to many grave diggers from all around the Netherlands. The practice is mostly the same everywhere I describe with the biggest difference being that some sites use the krane to remove the Sheds from the grave.
"I work in a distribution plant..."
I work in a distribution plant for the U.S. Postal Service. Putting "FRAGILE" on your package won't actually make us treat it any better; it's all going on one of the sorting machines anyway. While we do our best to prevent it from being crushed by other, heavier, packages, it's nowhere near guaranteed.
What should you do? Pack it FULL of soft things like bubble wrap or packing peanuts.
"I'm a low paid junior tech..."
Your internet service provider knows what kind of porn you watch.
I'm a low paid junior tech, and if you're not using a VPN, I can pretty much pull up the complete web browsing history of anyone in my service area.
"We'd go to power plants..."
Past profession. Environmental engineer. We'd go to power plants and such and make sure their emissions fall within epa standards. Well guess what happens if they fail an emissions test? They keep us on site while they change the settings and have us run tests until they pass. Not illegal apparently.
Gee, I wonder what happens as soon as we step off the property. Not like they'd change the settings back to what it was before, certainly not.
"I work in IT security..."
I work in IT Security and I gge paid to advise men how to hide their porn and side chicks. I also advise how to protect companies when their employees use porn or hire sex workers using company assets.
"As an example..."
The auto industry has a bunch of them. Find a shop that you trust. Dealerships tend to be a little less shady than independent shops, but they're not immune.
As an example, one of my friends works at a dealership and he said if they find an electrical issue that's likely caused by a battery they'll attach a bad battery's test results to sell a new battery.
"It required more training..."
It required more training for me to get my food handler's permit to make pizzas as a teenager than it did to be able to drive an ambulance. How much training (beyond proving I had a normal driver's license) did the latter require you may ask? Hint: it starts with a Z and ends with an ero.
"The most common of which..."
Most people would be amazed at the amount of health code violations that take place in restaurants. The most common of which is in fast food where items that are supposed to be labeled with hold times are just given new labels when they expire. As long as an inspector didn't see it never happened.
"I used to work..."
I used to work with a nonprofit organization that cleans up plastic bags and other litter and turns it into art or other items. Specifically, plastic bags would be washed, sanitized, and crocheted into different items like bags, coasters, etc.
Well, turns out that is how they marketed it. But in reality the artisans that made the crocheted pieces would buy the plastic bags in bulk, and crochet from those.
"That being said..."
I work as a welder/fitter, mostly on structural steel, and for the most part we do everything right because lives are literally on the line.
That being said, sometimes, by chance, and totally not because we know the beams will only be primed and then covered with concrete/more steel/walls/ceilings, there might be a slight chance of dicks being drawn on in oil markers designed to bleed through the paint. Oh, and that handrail almost definitely was not made with "schedule 80 posts" because the engineer is a dumbass and the rail is blocking you from falling into a wall on a stairway with 3 steps.
Also, its almost a guarantee that every time something isn't done by when the customer wants it, the foreman will blame it on the detailer or engineer not getting us prints soon enough, but it's almost definitely caused by the foreman forgetting when the job was due and not requesting prints, or forgetting we had prints until about a week before the job is supposed to be installed, especially if theres 40 tons of steel that hasn't even been ordered yet, and has to be galvanized.
"When meat falls on the ground..."
I'm a butcher.
When meat falls on the ground we pick it back up dust it off and put it back on a tray. The older butchers joke about it being "seasoned" before putting it back on a tray. Also flys are usually an issue in warming meat coolers, two of the places I've worked in the past had massive maggot infestations and fly's constantly landing on meat before it gets wrapped.
"It's very easy..."
I cut hair for a living as a Cosmetologist. It's very easy to harvest blood and hair (obviously) from clients and I know of one or two who make/have made voodoo dolls of clients.
Teachers heavily influence your child's future when they're in elementary school via a practice called tracking.
It's technically illegal, but it happens anyway. Basically, a student establishes their behavior and intelligence within the first few years of school. Teachers notice who has "promise" and talk about them with each other (not as a conspiracy, but just as interesting lunch conversation). Then, when students progress to the next grade, and the administration is putting together class lists, they group those smart students together. But teachers also pick out the troublemakers, and they get grouped together too. Have you ever wondered why your teacher had that one class they hated to teach?? That's why. It was the low tracking class, and it was packed full of the kids that were estimated to amount to little.
And it continues on through the grade levels. The smart kids who were identified in elementary school continue to get smarter because they're put in the best classes, typically with each other. They're pushed by guidance counselors toward AP courses and college credits. Meanwhile, lower tracked students, who weren't in the best classes, are pushed toward vocational and technical schools.
There's a correlation between socioeconomic status and a student's likelihood of being low tracked, but that's a much deeper and complex problem.
"When the butchers were grinding beef..."
I used to work at a butcher shop in a grocery store. When the butchers were grinding beef, they would add fat to the grinder if they needed a less lean product. One day I watched a butcher take pork fat out of the garbage and add it to ground beef.
I hope nobody with dietary restrictions buys food there. All I could think was "that's not kosher."
"To be fair..."
Pressure from higher-ups, on quality control, to sign off on welds that do not pass, at a nuclear power plant. To be fair, it isn't widespread, and is very illegal. But it does happen.
"All tenders are decided..."
I'm a distributor of a famous laboratory equipment brand made in NL in a South East Asia country. Everybody is corrupt here. All tenders are decided before they're even launched. We bribe the potential buyers to buy our product. And most of our salesperson markup that money to take some for themselves too. It's effed up. We buy from NL around 50k euro and sell it here for more than 200k.
"Their field teams..."
I used to work multiple jobs- from a babysitter, assistant in a long range telecommunications company, to a cashier at a gas station.
As a babysittern - some kids I used to babysit were about 10-12, but they always knew about all the s*** I didn´t want to show them. Sometimes, these kids talked about serious topic (like alcoholism and drugs), or in one instance, gore. Some of them didn´t have a problem in Cuphead COOP, Fortnite, or some other games, and were able to play these games pretty well, so when I was babysitting two siblings, we used to play a lot of Portal 2 and COOP games.
As an assistant in the LR telecomm company – we used to work along large telecomm companies. Their field teams had no clue about what they were doing - most of their experienced staff (that was out of the company) had already set up most of the stuff. We were usually contracted to do their stuff for large teams, even if there were only about 7 people on our staff traveling all across Slovakia (including me). We had a lot of disputes with Telekom, Orange, and the third largest internet provider in our country.
As a cashier at a gas station - expired food wasn't usually disposed off in the recommended way- sometimes we ate the food after the date of expiration where cameras and people couldn't see us. The only thing we've always got rid of were baguettes. I ate a ton of expired expensive yoghurts, hams, salamis and other stuff while on a lunch break. Also, when our bosses weren't present in the place, we used to make "illegal hotdogs", which were crazy combinations of stuff we had (vegetables & sauces that we had too much of, or all ingredients combined).
My coworker also usually gave me 4-5 overcooked sausages to take home, since their expiration period was only few hours long. One coworker took the expired food home with her to feed her chickens. Also, when the customers left the special points behind, we kept them to ourselves, and put them into the point collection cards. So, after each shift, I left with at least one six pack of beer, or a bottle of sparkling wine (special promotion for buying a cleaning program).
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Life is hard. It's a miracle to make it through with some semblance of sanity. We are all plagued by grief and trauma. More and more people of all backgrounds are opening up about personal trauma and its origins. Finally! For far too long we've been too silent on this topic. And with so many people unable to afford mental health care, the outcomes can be damaging.
All of our childhoods have ups and downs and memories that can play out like nightmares. We carry that, or it follows us and the first step in recovery is talking about it. So who feels strong enough to speak?
Redditor u/nthn_thms wanted to see who was willing to share about things they'd probably rather forget, by asking:
What's the most traumatizing thing you experienced as a child?
I am claustrophobic. It paralyzes my life. I can't ride elevators. I freak out at amusement parks. And don't get me started on trains in New York that get stuck in the tunnel. Why am I like this?
"I was about 7 or 8 when I heard some noise coming from the garage. My mom was at work and I was being babysat by one of my uncles. I went to open the garage to find my other uncle strangling his girlfriend up against the car. She had blood coming out of her nose and mouth. I just froze and stood there staring and my uncle didn't even notice and continued choking and strangling her."
"My other uncle came to the door where I was standing saw what was happening and grabbed me. He called my mom and then the police who later came and arrested my uncle. There's more to this story I wasn't privy to at such a young age. But yeah my other uncle is crazy. He's been to jail a few times, has anger and control issues."
"Going to another person's house and realizing that living in filth and decay and having breathing problems isn't the norm. Having dinner every night and a clean room was just a regular day in their household. Grass is always greener right? Especially when yours is dead and everyone from school thinks your house is haunted. Smh good riddance."
"Watching my grandpa slowly waste away on our living room couch. He had a paraganglioma on his pancreas, and there was nothing (especially in 1980) that could be done for him. I was four, and he was my favorite person, and I couldn't sit with him, or hug him, or anything. I miss him even after 40 years. Either that or my best friend dying over Christmas break in 1988. I miss her too. I pretty much hated everything after that."
"I saw my Dad get swept away and drowned when I was 11. It's really something I've never recovered from. It's been 16 years and not a day goes by I don't remember it. I live with it. I think we have to for those who we've lost. I always kind of imagine it as a sort of like an emotional loss of a limb. I haven't lost a limb, but I imagine you adapt to not having it. You learn. But you never forget you are missing an arm or a leg."
It's taken me years to confront my struggle. Finally a little while ago, I tried hypnotherapy and I was able to recover a childhood memory that manifested into my phobia. I was trapped in handcuffs as a joke by my babysitter's brother. Six hours.
"The older I got through my teens, the more my step-father's alcoholism spiralled out of control, and the more I was biding my time until I was 18 and would head off to college. Education was my only escape in my mind. Every instance of physical and emotional abuse had to be met with, "just shut up and take it, it'll be over someday." Really wish I could give that kid who slept on the floor of a three-bedroom trailer a hug and say that he'd make it out and get a master's degree. I feel like I just won a decade-long war."
"I had a dog that I absolutely loved. I begged for this dog in a Walmart parking lot a week before my 3rd birthday, my mom said I could have the dog but that meant no birthday presents or cake just the dog (she lied, I got presents, cake, and dog.) This dog went everywhere with me and did everything with me. Despite being a tiny mutt he would do his best to protect me from our Doberman who did not like me."
"In fairness to the doberman, as a 2 yr old I did stomp on his nuts for some unbeknownst reason so no hard feelings on not liking me. When I was 5 my mom became a truck driver so we moved in with my grandparents on their farm. While I was at school one day Bouncy had gotten into the fence with the donkeys and was kicked in the head."
"When I got off the bus I couldn't figure out why he wasn't waiting on me. My grandparents met me outside and told me what happened, then walked me in to where he was. He died 30 minutes after I got home like he was waiting to see me. I haven't been able to bond with a pet since."
"I saw our neighbor's collie killed by a driver speeding through the neighborhood. As a young boy, it had real impact because I loved her, and it hurt when he stuck his head out the driver's door window, grinned, and just sped off - leaving the dog dead in the road and me - a kid - in tears. As I once commented, how anyone could be so callous and cruel was beyond my imagination."
"I actually don't remember the event much, but when I was really young (~6years old) I was playing outside and I heard a woman screaming. I was curious so I went across the street to see a bunch of smoke coming out of the cracks in the front door. Didn't see any flames initially so I didn't put two and two together right away. My Dad saw me across the street in the driveway just staring at the house and when he investigated what I was doing he realized the house was on fire. Whole house burnt down."
"Older woman fell asleep on her couch with a lit cigarette. I was traumatized by fire as a kid and I was petrified about burning alive in my sleep for quite some time. Dad had to install a fire escape ladder in my room, fire extinguishers, etc. I was obsessed with what to do in case of fires as a kid. No longer an issue, but my parents still tell me stories about how they knew that messed me up."
"I was 12 and sat down at the edge of a sidewalk to pet a cat crossing the road. I lived on a very quiet, but wide street. Even if a car drove by, there would've been a lot of room, as I was in an area reserved for parallel parking. (No cars were parked though). All of a sudden a big red car sped up and swerved to hit the cat. It missed me by inches, and instantly killed the cat. It was decades ago, and I still think about it often."
"Oh, hands down, my mother alcoholism. It really messes you up in ways that you cannot imagine. And you don't even realize that until years after. I still can't drink alcohol because of it, it terrifies me to even entertain the possibility to become something close to her."
I survived. But, I'm still haunted. I think I always will be. But I have learned to manage. We all struggle with the past. We were too young to process. But now we have to try. You're not alone.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
Being single can be fun. In fact, in this time of COVID, being single can save lives. But the heart is a fickle creature.
And being alone can really suck in times of turmoil. None of us are perfect and it feels like that's all anyone is looking for... perfect.
Now that doesn't mean that all of us are making it difficult to partner up. Sure, some people are too picky and mean-spirited, but some of the rest of us are crazy and too much to handle. So one has to be sure.
The truth is, being single is confusing, no matter how much we try to match. So let's try to understand...
Redditor u/Mcxyn wanted to discuss some truths about love and our own issues, by asking:
Why are you single?
Give too much. Give too little. Pay for the first date. Don't pay for anything. I've heard it all. Sometimes it all worked, sometimes it didn't. Let's hear more...
Nemo?Finding Nemo Movie GIFGiphy
"There are plenty of fish in the sea. Unfortunately, I live in the desert."
"My girlfriend passed, and I can't figure out how to fall out of love with a dead woman."
"I think the only way I could move forward is knowing I will always love and cherish her memory, but am capable of loving another as well. Then again there's nothing wrong with making peace with the fact you've had the love of your life and staying single."
"I tell myself it's by choice."
"Here is the reality, it may make some feel better. If you aren't using a dating app, not going to bars/clubs or putting yourself out there, you have made a conscious choice not to date. If you are ok with this, you have NOTHING to be ashamed or worried about. Some people are wired differently. Not everyone wants to be in a relationship. If you are not ok with this, you need to make some changes in your life. And no, it's not their fault. Do some introspection."
"Self esteem issues. Anyone I like enough to date deserves better than me."
"I have a question for you, I suspect that this person I really care for a lot also really cares a lot for me but they push me away despite never fighting having any disagreements or ever a bad time or issue of any type. In fact, we've always really enjoyed each other's company. So my question is would you or have you just given up on someone despite really liking them because you thought that they'd just leave you anyway and couldn't possibly be happy with you--and they'd would be disappointed? Thinking you're doing them a favor?
"It's not really that I would be worried about them leaving or being disappointed with me. I'm disappointed in myself, and I wouldn't want to bring that into a relationship. I don't like me, so how can I ask someone else to? If I've given up on myself, then I'm really not bringing anything to the relationship except baggage. I'm not sure I'm doing them a favor, but I am sure that they will find someone better than me."
"Also, I swear I'm a functioning human lol. These are legit the deep dark thoughts that come out in the wee hours of the morning. I am trying to fight against this train of thought as much as I can, but I hope you can see why I wouldn't want to make this someone else's problem, especially someone that I care for deeply."
The Appeal...So Excited Reaction GIF by OriginalsGiphy
"I assume because I'm not appealing in any way to anyone"
no one else....
"I can barely handle myself, what makes you think I could handle some other fool?!"
"For me, it is a choice. In my country, marriage is set up by parents and children barely have a say in 90% cases. I am 35 now and still single, think of it how you will. I just detest human interactions. When I try to recall the happiest moments of my life, all of them were with my dogs, gods help their departed souls. I can't imagine spending intimate time with another human being. And a relationship is unnecessary bondage. It is an utter waste of time, money, energy and everything one can imagine."
"I'm a physically ugly dude who generally dates by having people get to know me for a while, look past my looks and develop feelings for me. Post-university this has been extremely difficult, as I don't have enough people coming through my life despite my best efforts, and doubly so in a dating market that is so thoroughly warped by looks-based online dating."
"I lack the social skills."
"It's difficult, I avoided people and bonding with people because I was too insecure about being socially unskilled and this only gets worse with time, people are growing and getting better at it, but I barely started really."
ConnectionsDont Touch Me Season 9 GIF by FriendsGiphy
"I don't connect with people very well. I have a hard time talking to people I care about normal things, and I have an even harder time talking to them about my feelings. On top of that I have really bad social anxiety and I don't have a lot of friends, so the chances of me actually getting in a relationship is basically zero."
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Whether you're an at home parent, a college student just leaving the nest, or a Food Network junkie, there are a few basic tips that everyone should know.
Chef's gave us some of their top tips for amateurs and beginner at home cooks that will really make a difference. They are trained professionals with years of experience in the kitchen, so they definitely know what we're all missing.
If you're looking to improve some of your cooking skills and techniques, but you're still learning how to boil water correctly, this list is for you.
Redditor BigBadWolf44 wanted in on the secrets and asked:
"Chefs of Reddit, what's one rule of cooking amateurs need to know?"
Let's learn from the masters!
What a common mistake!
"A lot of the time when people add salt to a dish because they think it tastes flat, what it really needs is an acid like lemon juice or vinegar."
"Instructions unclear I drugged my dinner party guests and now they're high on acid."
"Yes! Or tomatoes. They're pretty acidic too and go with so many things. Our dinners are so much better once the garden tomatoes are ripe. Or if a dish is too acidic, oil/butter or a little sugar can help add balance to it."
"Like tomato and eggs. Every Chinese mom makes those slightly differently and I haven't had a tomato egg dish I didn't like yet."
"There's a book called 'Salt Fat Acid Heat' that comes highly recommended to amateur cooks."
"Reading even just the first chapter about salt made a lot of food I cooked immediately better, because I finally understood salt wasn't just that thing that sat on the dinner table that you applied after the meal was cooked."
"Salt is important for sweets. A batch of cookies without that little hint of salt doesn't taste quite right."
Unfortunately, this tip might not be accessible to everyone. Many people who contracted COVID can no longer use their sense of smell the way they used to.
"Have a friend that lost his smell from COVID, and now he only recognizes if food is salty, sweet, sour or bitter."
"Just wait until he gets his sense of smell back and a ton of foods smell like ammonia or literal garbage now. Yeah, that's fun... It's been 7 months for f*cks sake just let me enjoy peanut butter again!!!!!!!!!"
You can't take back what you've already put in.
"You can always add, but you cannot take away."
"I find people's problems usually are they're too scared to add rather than they add too much."
"I see you also grew up white in the mid-west."
"Not really a cooking tip, but a law of the kitchen: A falling knife has no handle."
"I'm always so proud of my reflexes for not kicking in when I fumble a knife."
"If I drop anything else, my stupid hands are all over themselves trying to catch it (and often failing). But with a knife the hardwired automatic reaction is jump back immediately. Fingers out of the way, feet out of the way, everything out of the way. Good lookin out, cerebellum!"
"Speaking of KICKING in. On first full time cooking job I had a knife spin and fall off the counter. My (stupid) reflex was to put my foot under it like a damn hacky sack to keep it from hitting the ground. Went through the shoe, somehow between my toes, into the sole somehow without cutting me. Lessons learned: (1) let it fall; (2) never set a knife down close to the edge or with the handle sticking out; (3) hacky sack is not nearly as cool as it could be."
"Similarly, NEVER put out a grease or oil fire with water. Smother with a lid or dump baking soda in there (do not use flour, as it can combust in the air making things worse)."
How else will you know it tastes good?
"Taste the food."
"Also don't be afraid to poke and prod at it. I feel like people think the process is sacred and you can't shape/flip/feel/touch things while you cook them. The more you are hands on, the more control you have."
"No, this does not include situations where you are trying to sear something. Ever try flipping a chicken thigh early? That's how you rip a chunk out of it and leave it glued to the pan until it's burnt."
Here's one just for laughs.
"When you grab a pair of tongs, click them a few times to make sure they are tongs."
"People really overlook this one. You've gotta tong the tongs a minimum of 3 times to make sure they tong, or else it can ruin the whole dish."
If you're looking to get into cooking or to improve you technique, pay attention to these few tips.
Salt generously, add an acid to brighten things up, and don't forget to taste your food!
If all else fails, you can always order take out.
As part of the learning process, children often do embarrassing things before they learn a little more about the world and all the different implications therein. While the inappropriate moment is usually minor and ends in laugher some instances are truly mortifying.
One such instance involved a little sister who was around 6 at the time. It was the 90s and at the height of the youth-focused PSAs (think the frying egg representing your brain). One type was a safety PSA about stranger danger. The speaker would remind the children that if a stranger tried to take you anywhere to yell “Stop, you're not my mommy/daddy" to raise the alarm.
Fast forward to our grocery store trip with our mother, my younger sister, and myself. Sister was having a fit over wanting one of those cheap plastic toy packs they hang in some of the aisles. Mom said no.
Cue the scream, my little blonde sister lets out a wail and starts yelling for the entire store to hear "Stop it! You aren't my mom! You aren't my mommy! No!" My mom tried to grab her hand and tell her to stop but then realized that in doing so it made the scene look worse.
It was such a mix of mortification and humor that I just stood there. Little sister stopped after a few minutes, pretty sure she got her prized toy just to shut up. Now that I'm older it's a wonder the police didn't come.
Redditor Granted01 wanted to hear the most embarrassing childhood moments the internet had to offer and asked the subreddit:
“What inappropriate thing did you do as a child that you didn't realise was inappropriate?"
The answers make us want to crawl into a hole for them.
“My parents used to keep mini bottles of liquor in the fridge (the ones you'd find in hotel mini bar). We had to make our own lunches at times when mom and dad were busy with work and my first-grade self decided to empty the bottles into the sink and put juice in them to bring to school… my parents got a call that day from school lol." wander-lux
On my--well, him...
“Not me but my daughter. We live in a place where we don't see many people of different ethnicities but one day she saw a Muslim man with a beard dressed in the long white outfit, and she was convinced he was God."
“No idea why but she wouldn't leave the dude alone (she was 4) and started reeling off a Christmas list.. turns out Santa and God were mixed up too. Thankfully he found it funny." ApricotSuperb7196
“Not me, but my sister used to lap her drinks up like a dog. Turns out she was calling this "doggy style". One time they forgot to bring her a straw at the restaurant we were in and she loudly screamed "guess I'll do it doggy style". I think she was 7 or 8 at the time." knotsy-
Not what they’re called…
“I used to call those pigeons with the pointy tuft on their heads ‘horny birds’. I would yell it out so loudly too -.- my mum told me she had to look away every time I did it because it made her laugh until she cried. Obviously I wasnt told until later because I was only 5 at the time.” Artherwritethiss
Anything but that *gag*
“I used to play with this cup in the bath and drink water out of it for years, did it in the shower too as i got older, it had a handle on the end of it and I never knew why. One day I witnessed my mother use this cup in the toilet violently, and that was the moment I realized what a plunger was."
“It scared me I was about 10 when I realized what I had been using as a toy. I would fill it up with water in the bath or shower and play with it, and sip the water out of it, etc as kids do with toys I guess. Probably never forget that." That-nz-guyChannel 9 Brush GIF by Married At First Sight AustraliaGiphy
“riding my big wheel across one of the busiest roads in town…”
“I was a serious nudist as a child. My parents could never keep me in my clothes. My older sister would have her friends over who I had a crush on and I'd run outside butt naked to see them. There's a story that I still get teased about to this day of when my neighbor called my mom at work to tell her I was riding my big wheel across one of the busiest roads in town completely nude.” jdbuck99
“I called my Granny's boyfriend a dirty bastard…”
“I grew up on Looney Tunes & would call people who were mean to me stinkers or dirty bastards. I called my Granny's boyfriend a dirty bastard cause he started teasing me. I had my mom dying.” Kuriosity93
“my mum made me forge her papers…”
“When I was like 12 my mom was on probation and had to do community service. (Still no idea why) I had pretty good cursive handwriting at the time and my mum made me forge her papers and sign her p.o's name saying she was doing her service. Good times. Thanks for the memories mum.” osum_o_posum
Why didn’t they say anything!?
“When I was in 5th grade we made a calendar to take home. We each had our picture taken and glued to cover and were allowed to decorate it and each of the following months however we chose."
“Being 10 (nearly 11) there was so much that I didn't know about the world. What made it tick and more importantly, its history. Prior to the creative masterpiece that was unfolding in class, at home, I had walked in on my dad watching a WWII documentary where they showed footage of the German regalia and, subsequently, their flags."
“Not knowing any better, I thought the 'windmill' symbol was really cool and decided it should be on the cover of this calendar. One in each corner with my photo smack dab in the middle."
“No one said anything to me about it. It went through the lamination machine and was sent home with me. I wish I could've seen my teacher's reaction while she thought one of her students had skinheads for parents..." FusedByFire
A different way to say hello…
“Right, so anyone who's seen Mr. Bean (the movie) probably remembers the scene where he waves his middle finger at people tryna say hi? I did that. To an elderly person. Need I say more.” Blackrap1d
These cringe-worthy and laughable moments are brought to you by the ignorance of childhood. We've nearly all had a moment like this growing up, some just way, way worse than others.