
There's a dark part of us which revels in a good, ol' fashioned verbal or physical smackdown. You pull up your chair, edge as close as comfortably possible, and watch some punk get what's coming to them. While it may not always be you delivering the deserved final blow, the world is full of extremely talented and skilled individuals, ready to give the jerks of planet Earth what for.
And we're here for it.
Reddit user, u/MapleMemed, wanted people far and wide to come together in our wicked enjoyments and share:
What is the best "You f-ed with the wrong person" moment you've seen?
Teachers Probably Didn't Mind Too Much
7th Grade Science.
Bully...almost more of a bullys henchman, said something about a quiet kid's mother. Quiet Kids mom was dead. Quiet Kid also apparently studied boxing. Who knew?
"What did you say about my mom?" wham What did you say about my mom? wham Bully Henchman was so shocked he did nothing and took the two straight punches to his face. I don't think he got in trouble. Happened before the teacher came in.
Isn't That The Plot To Every Clint Eastwood Movie?
Watching my 72 year old father beat the piss out of a guy who tried to steal my mom's purse.
Wise To Leave Everyone Alone
Was riding the bus home from school one day. Bunch of a--holes messing around in the back throwing food and other junk. A quiet, overweight kid sat in front of them, minding his own business when one of the a--holes thought it would be funny to shove an old sandwich in his face and call him fat boy.
Quiet kid stood up and knocked him out in a single hit, then grabbed his bag and walked up to the front of the bus and got off at his stop as if nothing happened.
Don't Look Back When You're Ahead
Yuppy frat boy in an econ course I was taking my freshman year got caught cheating. At my university, we all sign a contract agreeing to their honor code policies, and cheating is an automatic expulsion. But, the professor decided to be nice, and was just going to give the kid a zero on the exam.
Frat kid doesn't think that's enough, and it turns into an argument. Kid starts saying how "in" his family is at the university, and how none of this matters because he'll just "pull some strings". Long story short, our professor is actually close friends with the chancellor of our school. Not only did the kid get expelled from the school, but they somehow got him into legal trouble as well for some of the comments made in class that day. I don't know what was said that could have been used against him, but the kid ended up in some deep sh-t.
Choose Your Opponents More Wisely
There was this guy who was part of our group in college. He was an a-- but he was one of the guys' brothers so he hung out with us a lot. Whenever he would get drunk he would try to pick fights. We would just shake it off and ignore him.
One of the guys hosted a pretty big NYE party. As it goes, this dude got drunk and tried to pick fights again. People were getting uncomfortable. There was one guy at the party who was about 6'4 and built like a tank who was just not having it. He waited to be confronted and then immediately carried the guy outside and threw him down on a stair and broke his leg.
He stopped picking fights after that.
Thank You For Your Honest Admission
Me drunk af on a party bus for my cousins 21st. Being a complete a-- because I was letting my brother who had issues with someone get me worked up on his drama. Got in a huge brawl outside of one of the stops and decided to take a shot at one of the guys I didn't like. Hit him with everything I had. I mean EVERYTHING!
I literally broke my f-cking hand on his face. He got up, looked at me, and calmly said "You just f-cked up."
He was right.
Greatest Weapon Is Your Brain
This is low key, but I enjoyed it:
My first week at a white collar job (my first such job), and we were in the middle of a department wide meeting - about 17 coworkers and supervisors altogether.
The person leading the meeting asks a question of no one in particular, and several of us answer. My answer differed from the rest. One guy turns to me and says: "let's leave these questions to the people who actually have a masters degree, shall we?"
I looked at him and said: "I have a masters degree." The room went silent, except for one guy who loudly 'ooohed.' I had given the correct answer, to top it off.
Don't Step Outside Your Comfort Zone
Watching a middle schooler think she's tough enough to pick a fight with a h.s basketball player get thrown to the floor and nearly get punched in the face.
One of those moments when you realize why most schools go grades 6-8/9-12.
Suddenly, You Have Everything To Lose
My cousin was walking home one day when a guy pulled a knife on him to try and mug him.
My cousin apparently just laughed in his face and then proceeded to beat the crap out of him. My cousin then walked home only to realize he had be sliced up in the arm.
Don't mess with ex-military with nothing to lose.
Don't Try To Trick A Trickster
This was at my old job a few years ago. Hispanic woman cussed me out for not letting her use a three year old expired coupon, calling me racist, so I called up my Hispanic store manager.
She was PISSED, there was a brief screaming match before the customer finally slunk out. Boss said she couldn't wait to get a call from corporate about it, she was ready to go over it; her biggest pet peeve was people using the race card for stupid sh-t.
When You Can Impersonate Jason Voorhees...
Not as good as the other ones here, but I still thought I'd share
Me and my friend group live in Australia so don't be confused when I say we're 12-13 years old in year 7
We're all around 5-5'8'', except for out American friend Tyler who's about 4'5". Right after we had got our school photos taken, all of our year were waiting around an area tucked away in the back of our school. Tyler stole my friend Nick's (whose about a foot taller than Tyler and we're all kind of scared of) water bottle and started attacking Nick with it cause Tyler's a bit of an a--hole.
I started recording because I knew what was gonna happen next, Nick turned around and coincidentally, as I was watching through my recording phone, my phone slipped from my hand and I caught it without dropping it, but during that half a second of time, Nick Jason Vorhees styled picked Tyler up choking him and threw him onto the ground. Tyler didn't speak another word to Nick once that day and I always watch the video at least once a week.
Study Your Craft. That's All You Need To Do.
I didn't see this, but a 5'2" friend at work told me about when he went to a club with his friend (a 5' Asian guy) and parked in the alley behind the club. When they came out, there were guys trying to break into his car.
"Hey, leave my car alone."
"Yeah? What are you going to do about it?"
Well, turns out the Asian dude was a black belt in 3 martial arts. When they attacked him, they had zero chance. He singlehandedly left three large (6'+) criminals laying in the alley with broken arms, legs and ribs and drove off.
Don't. Mess. With. My. Employees.
Working at the local supermarket while in high school. We had an old guy who collected the carts. Then to 'help' him we hired a mentally challenged guy, early twenties. Terry was well over six feet tall but he was like a child. The most kind-hearted guy I ever met. The checkout girls loved him.
One day we got robbed. Guy came in and while the till was open he reached over and grabbed a fistful of cash. He would likely have gotten away with it too if he hadn't made one fatal mistake - he pushed the cashier. One of the already mentioned checkout girls.
Well Terry was a good distance away, but he saw it and instantly he was moving like Lawrence Taylor. The thief made it like 100 feet outside the door and just around the corner before Terry tackled him. I'm guessing they hit the ground pretty hard. A couple of managers ran after them and then the cops showed up. Then the ambulance.
A few minutes afterward, Terry came back with the managers and a couple of cops. Apparently the managers had to pull Terry off the thief.
Who Are The Tough Guys Afraid Of?
Friend of mine used to own a pretty big bar that would probably need three bouncers on big nights due to how rowdy it could get. He only had 2 though. He had a policy where the bouncers were not allowed to use throws if the drunks got violent. Too dangerous on such wiggly folk.
One bouncer not only ignored this but would do it to show off. When confronted after nearly killing a guy on a throw gone awry the jerk got physical and found out why there wasn't a third bouncer. The scrawny looking owner was actually jacked and a retired marine.
Don't. Touch. The. Drums.
There was this guy who played drums all the time in Hawaii on the city strip. Nice guy, never chatted much except for a wave and to throw him a few dollars. Some drunk tourist decided it would be fun to mess with his drums. Guy gave him so many chances to walk away. Drunk tourist winds up for a punch and the dude just knocked him out in one punch. I just stood there and my buddy had the presence of mind to tell the guy to pack his sh-t and leave before the cops come. Guy was pretty f-cked up and we helped him till the ambulance came. I'm pretty sure with the way that his jaw looked it wouldn't be a short recovery.
Don't Put Pride In Anything That Can Be Destroyed
My high school boyfriend and my older brother. My freshman year of high school I met "Scotty". He was a little on the weird side, a scene kid, but he was nice enough. Until the day he decided to hit me. I said something he didn't agree with and in retaliation he slapped the bejeezus out of me. If there was an award for best b-tch slap then Scotty won it. My head snapped back, saliva flew from my mouth, tears formed in my eyes.
We had had been in the car, sitting in traffic behind some accident or other. He kicked me out of the car and made me walk home. I sat down on the side of the road and called my brother because I wasn't ready to deal with my mother's reaction.
My brother showed up in his Jeep, held up traffic on a Friday afternoon to make sure I was okay. He had even stopped at the store and bought me a bag of frozen peas for me cheek. We drove on, the car was deadly silent. My brother was steely faced, white knuckle gripping the wheel, pure-white anger in his eyes.
We drove past our road and kept going. He pulled into Scotty's yard and stormed up to the door. I stayed in the car. Scotty came out, five foot seven to my brother's six foot three. My brother grabbed him by the shirt and lifted him a good foot off the ground. I didn't hear what was said, all I know is my brother never had to hit the kid, whatever he said to him made Scotty go pale and shaky.
Brother laid him down on the front porch, came back down, got in the Jeep and wrecked that boy's front yard. Tore it the hell up. Scotty's dad was one of those guys who won awards for his yard.Scotty had to explain to his dad why his yard was messed up. His parents called and apologized for their son's behavior. We never heard another word from Scotty.
It's easy for Americans who haven't traveled outside the country to assume citizens in other parts of the world have access to the same amenities offered in the US.
But people who were not born in the States know very well how what a world of difference life in North America is compared to where they've come from.
Curious to hear of the things most Americans take for granted as citizens of the US, Redditor CapitalBread6959 asked:
"Fellow Non-Americans, what is something quite common in the U.S. that is completely unheard of in your own country?"
Americans do drinking differently.
Bottoms Up
"My German friend visited us in college. First party he goes 'THEY DO EXIST!!' and held up our pack of red solo cups. Haha"
â mulljackson
Cup Overruneth
"Free drink refills."
â internetsss
H2O Required
"Every single place with a bar is legally obliged to provide free tap water on demand in England. Most restaurants will give you a pint of tap water with food for free (you do have to specify tap otherwise you get stung with some fancy expensive shite!) Admittedly the measures of alcohol are small here, though, compared to other places."
â anon
Some industries have laxed work protocols compared to in other countries.
Bee-Lining It For Home
"Health care workers going home after work still in scrubs. And washing them at home."
â orebro1234
Work Clothes Stay At Work
"This!! It's so weird to me. Here it's literally forbidden to leave hospital grounds in your work clothes. I would hate having to bring them home and possibly carry some resistant hospital bacteria there with me. Plus you never know how well other people wash theirs, I like it done professionally at the hospital."
â pauliaomi
Making Sense Of It All
"Many moons ago, I did an IT internship at a hospital's service desk and being the intern, was always the one who had to run out and physically check things."
"When I had to go in to work on something in an operating room, I had to put on a full body tyvek suit, gloves, mask, coverings for my shoes, etc."
"Which made sense to me. Except the OR nurses who worked there wood just breeze in and out all day long, wearing the same scrubs they wore commuting to work on the bus."
"That DIDN'T make sense to me."
â caribou16
Meanwhile, over at school...
Dances Don't Happen Everywhere
"Homecoming, Sadie Hawkins, Winter Formal, Prom..."
"We have none of this, the closest thing is the graduation itself."
â badeksha
American Educators
"Teachers buying school stuff so they can teach."
â comicsnerd
The way certain things work in the US definitely raised eyebrows.
Feeding The Sink
"This thing were the kitchen sink has teeth."
â PoetPont
Going Nowhere Fast
"As a Dutchy, driving a car and turning right on a red light. That messed with my head. If you do that here you are gonna hit at least 5 cyclists."
â CowabungaNL
My Japanese cousin always comments on how Americans are friendly and are more open to striking up a conversation as opposed to citizens in Japan, where they prefer to keep to themselves and be captivated by their smartphones out in public.
As an introvert and one who can't stand small talk, I actually loved being left alone whenever I was in Japan riding the subway and walking about the city. Nothing against engaging with other people, but I found the quiet and my personal space being respected to be very calming.
People Break Down Things That Were Normal When They Were A Kid That You Don't See Anymore
The world is ever-changing.
One need only look at the evolution of home entertainment.
First, we had to go to the video store to buy or rent video cassettes, then video cassettes were wiped out by DVDs until video stores became obsolete owing to streaming services.
Making the one-season failure of the Netflix series Blockbuster painfully ironic.
However, those of us who grew up rushing to Blockbuster, hoping the last copy of Jurassic Park will still be there, can't help but wish we could relive the experience.
On the other hand, we are glad to see other things from our childhood have become extinct.
"What was normal when you were a kid, but you never see anymore?"
Honestly... Rude then, Rude Now!
"Showing up to someoneâs house without a text or call."- lpkrew
Before There Was Bluetooth...
"Cassette tape innards strung out along the highway, glimmering in the sunlight."- bigolfurryhead
No More Second Hand Smoke!
"Parents smoking in a car with kids with the windows rolled up."- WonderfulEmergency77
"Everybody smoked everywhere. At restaurants, the office, airports, everywhere."
"There's a picture of my grandma holding me as a baby in one hand and a cigarette in the other."
"Nobody thought that was the least bit strange."- MeghanFI
Now We Have Google!
"Using a set of 20 y/old encyclopedias as reference for my homework."
"JFK is president!"- ResplendentAmore
It Got Them Off Shelves...
"Toys in the cereal box"- NightDreamer73
How Sad...
"Fruit bats."
"There used to be a *ton* of them in my neighborhood as a kid and every evening you could look at the sunset as twilight set in and see flocks of bats flying around."
"Apparently, around the time I was in middle school, a fungal disease ravaged the local bat population and they never recovered."
"You never see them anymore."
"Funnily enough though, at the time, a local high school girl had this huge campaign to set up bat feeders to help bolster the local bat population and help them survive the fungal disease by giving them easy access to food."
"Said local girl has since become a federal Park Ranger as an adult and currently works for a state fish and wildlife service."- DoctorWatchamacallit
Now They'll Just Send Them A Text...
"Moms yelling from the front door to their kids to come home for dinner."- sflogicninja
Depending On Your Circle
"People talking about the Bermuda Triangle."- GarconMeansBoyGeorge
Best Not To Give Them Bad Ideas
"Candy Cigarettes."- Mechhammer
They're a dying breed indeed...
"Pay phones and answering machines."- Mondayslasagna
Even Printers Are Uncommon, Thanks to PDFs...
"Computer paper filled with lightly printed numbers and it had tear-off sides."
"My dad used to bring lots of it home for us kids to draw on."- reverendgrebo
...what were you watching?...
"Quicksand in movies and TV shows."- kzab81
Well That's Poignant
"Fireflies."
'I swear I saw them every year, in our back yard or when we went camping etc."
"Now I never see them no matter where I am, except for a few nights in the summer of '21 after I moved to a new house."
"It was so nice to see them again."- ModernCivilWar
Sadly, Not Because People Started Reading Maps...
"Printing out directions from Map Quest."- Keone_710
To think there was actually a time when we couldn't say "I'll text again when I'm close" and had to ask a friend to record a movie or tv show we wanted to watch.
Simpler times...
There's little more frustrating than a mystery that was never solved.
The victim's family never gets closure, a killer may still be at large, and our minds continue to spin trying to figure out how something happened.
Perhaps most frustrating of all is knowing that there is an explanation for it out there somewhere.
And, there are people desperate to find it.
"You get the opportunity to find out the truth behind one unsolved case, which are you choosing?"
Missing Friend
"I wish I could find out what happened to my childhood best friend."
"She went missing ten years ago and nothing was discovered about the case since."- Weevelle
Missing Neighbor
"There was a kid that went missing right around my hometown when I was a kid."
"Couple years younger than me."
"It was on the news a bit, it kinda fizzled out and I haven't been able to find anything since."
"Still see flyers for him now and then. Kyron Horman."- KnockerFogger69
Murderer On The Loose
"For all my french redditors here, I will say the Xavier Dupont De LigonnĂšs case."
"The guy killed all his family and buried them under his concrete deck, before disappearing completely without leaving any traces, and it has been more than ten years."- OopsieDoopsi
Mysterious Death
"Gareth Williams, that MI6 guy who was found dead inside a padlocked suitcase."
"His death was ruled as a self-inflicted accident and then later some former KGB guy would claim the KGB killed him after failing to convert him to a double agent."- adweeeb·
Not A Simple Hit And Run...
"Two boys I went to school with were killed in a hit and run by the side of the road while walking home from a party.'
"According to some reports, only one of the boys died from being hit by a car and the other appeared to have been beaten to death."
"It's been 20 years and no one has ever confessed or offered any information about the case."- an-invisible-titan
What Is Her Brother-In-Law Hiding?
"Rebecca Reusch."- illuminalice
Top Of Everybody's List
"Zodiac killer."- tdunc1994
Unknown Assassin
"Olof Palme, PM of Sweden."- Swedish_STD
What Are They Hiding?
"Where is Shelly Miscavige?"- Bucketlist074
Tragically Confusing
"Asha Degree."
"9-year-old girl left her house in the middle of the night, while it was storming and cold, with a pre packed bag of clothes."
"She had no reason to run away, and had limited computer access."
"A truck driver said they saw her walking that same early morning on the dark next to the highway, and that she ran into the woods."
"Over a year later, her backpack was found wrapped in a plastic bag about 26 miles away, which didnât yield any further developments."
"Why did she leave?"
"Why did she run from the trucker?"
"How did her backpack end up so far away?"
"Is she still alive?"
"Was she met with foul play?"- bookloverpink
A Step-By-Step Guide
"Alcatraz escapees."- Ceyram
Who Was That Guy?!?!
"Jennifer Kesse."
"I am not sure why, but this is the one case I haven't been able to stop thinking about for years."
"The surveillance video of the perp who parked her car drives me insane."- imalittleredhouse
They Deserve Justice
"My friends' murder."
"He was killed ten years ago over Thanksgiving weekend, and his case still remains open today."
"His family deserves to know."- ToulouseDM
Hopefully Not For Long
"I know it's very recent but the Idaho college murders."- surgeryboy7
It's tragic that these mysteries remain unsolved.
But if there is anything to be gained from this mystery, it's the fact that these poor people will never be forgotten.
As the saying goes, "you die twice, once when you take your last breath, and once when they stop saying your name."
All languages have certain words that roll so beautifully off the tongue.
It's no wonder why listening to vocal arias from operas and oratoriosâwhich are typically in languages other than Englishâcan be such a satisfying experience.
Examples coming to mind that are pleasant to the ear include, "Un Bel Di Vedremo" from the Italian opera Madame Butterfly and "Au fond du temple saint"âa duet from the French opera, Les pĂȘcheurs de perles.
Curious to hear from strangers online, Redditor candela1200 asked:
"What is your favorite word in a foreign language?"
People found these words fun to say.
Not Always, But...
"Tokidoki - 'sometimes' in Japanese, just really fun to say lol"
â rogue_rocketeer_
It Flutters
"Papillon. Means butterfly in french and its fun to say."
â kk1289
Der Emergency Vehicle
"Krankenwagen"
"German for ambulance."
â 8thFurno
A Childhood Memory
"When I was a kid, the first Xbox 360 game I ever got was a Spanish copy of Halo 3 (I don't speak Spanish). At the beginning of the campaign, the characters keep saying 'careful' over and over again. Because of this, 'cuidado' has become one of my favorite Spanish words, and the voice they used has become my default voice to say other Spanish words. My other favorite has to be 'resbaloso'. A large, exaggerated r roll and a boisterous tone just makes this one of the most fun words to say in any language."
â AdriftMusic
A Favorite Pasttime
"Winkel. It means 'shop' in Dutch."
â MrRonObvious
These words are not compliments.
Those Darn Kids
"Gowniaki - polish for 'Sh*tling' in reference of annoying kids."
â BmMjO
Referring To Contemptible People
"Pendejo."
â Broccoli_Vivid
Like The F-Bomb
â'Tabarnak!' I love how, instead of being bodily-function based like English swear words, French Canadian sacres are mostly related to Catholicism. This one is my favourite as itâs the rough equivalent of the versatile 'f''k' swear in English, so many uses."
â jerrys153
You may want to sound these out slowly.
Well, We've Tried
"Verschlimmbesserung - German noun for an attempted improvement that only makes things worse."
â JR_0507
The Translation Doesn't Track
"Meerschweinchen, itâs German for Guinea Pigs, I like it because it literally means 'little sea pigs'. Which makes no sense."
â AdvantageBig568
What An Inebriate Would Say
"kalsarikÀnnit - originating in Finland, in which the drinker consumes alcoholic drinks at home, dressed in as little clothing as possible, mainly in underwear with no intention of going out."
â evendronesflyaway
My favorite word or phrase really, is "Oh la, la, c'est cher"âwhich means, "Oh my, it's expensive," in French.
It was one of the first phrases I learned in middle school when I started taking French as an elective.
When I went home and shared with my mom what I learned, she was so amused by how the alarming phrase sounded. She couldn't stop laughing.
This led to her constantly asking me to repeat it whenever we were in the presence of her friends, and I milked it.
This is one of my treasured memories of my mother.