People Share The Best Lie They Ever Told Their Siblings
One of the best parts about having siblings is the ability to mess with them. Are you even a sibling if you're not playing pranks and messing with their heads?
No. The right answer is no - especially if that sibling is younger and more readily believes your shenanigans.
Reddit user MBTshock asked
Older sibling of Reddit, what is the biggest/best lie you told your siblings?
Some of these are hilarious, some of these may go a bit far for some people's taste, it really depends on how "evil" you're willing to get with the youngsters in your life.
50. Poor Duped Kid
My mother is fluent in Spanish and I told my brother that "puta" means "I love you" in French and he the next day says it to my mom like 10 times and got grounded for a month
49. To Pass The Troll
There is this iconic troll underneath one of the bridges in Seattle. This troll has a Volkswagen beetle in his hand. When my brother was flour or five, he really likes Hot Wheels cars. Well, eight year old me took advantage of that and told him that the troll had stolen the car in his sleep and will never give it back. I don't know if he still believes it.
48. Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo
I managed to convince my sister I could use the remote to zap her into the tv. I would chase her around the house.
I was a jerk and got yelled at a lot for picking on her.
47. Yes, This Is Dad
When we were in middle/high school, my younger brother used to get in trouble at school a lot. Whenever the school called our house to to inform my parents, I would answer the phone and pretend to be my dad.
46. Help Me, Obi-Wan Kenobi
I had a pretty bad hide-and-seek spot so I told my little brother I was just a hologram of myself and I would lead him to the real me. It got boring after like two minutes, but those two minutes were hilarious.
45. One Usage Only
My sister looks just like our mom. Uncanny, really. I had just read House of the Scorpion, so I told her she was actually a clone that my family had created so our mom could uh, make use of her organs when her kidneys failed (I made up a disease).
44. Belgia? I Hardly Know Her!
Not my sibling. But I once convinced my younger cousin (6 months younger than me. When we were in 8th grade) that Belgian waffles were from the nation of Belgia. He believed it for weeks.
43. When Freckles Attack
I once convinced my sister a freckle on her thumb was poop and she had a full on meltdown running around the house screaming "IT WONT COME OFF!". God my mum killed me.
42. The Slender Man Of Vegetables
When we were little our parents were less than super attentive so it usually fell to me to make sure my little brother ate well. One night he was giving me a REAL hard time, so I told him he better eat his veggies or the 'scary man' was going to get him. I was making it up as I went and I think he suspected as much, because he was still refusing to eat and left the table to go outside and play.
So I went into my closet and got this big black hooded cloak I had from a past Halloween and put it on. I went out the back door and came around the house to the front where he was playing, and hid behind a tree. When he got close enough I stepped into view and said in the scariest voice my little prepubescent girl self could muster, "You didn't eat your vegetables."
I never saw a little boy run inside and shovel peas into his mouth so fast in my life.
41. C'mon And Vogue
I'm the younger sibling, but when I was younger, there was a big thunderstorm outside and I was really scared. So my sister said that when there's lightning, it just means that God is taking pictures of us. And then we started to pose like models on my mom's bed in the middle of night.
40. Yer A Wizard Harry
Not me, but my older brother convinced me (~7 at the time) and my younger brother (~5) he was a wizard.
He told us he went to WizardLand every night (like 2/3am) and he'd come back in the morning and tell us all about it. We both 100% believed him.
We were so shocked, we asked so many questions and begged him to take us with him. But he always said it was just wizards and we couldn't go. He said they had wands and did spells and he went through a portal that appeared in his room deep in the night.
Me and my brother started plotting to catch him in the night. We'd pull all nighters waiting for something to happen and when it didn't, we'd accuse him of being a liar. But he'd say it didn't happen because he knew we were hiding and watching. So again, we believed him.
It's not until many years later did we both realise it was an outrageous lie stemmed from too much Wizard101 playing and a storybook he'd come across about a girl who'd sneak off into a magic portal at night and become a princess (she got caught because she'd always come back and leave bits and bobs lying around from her nightly adventures).
Man, did I feel stupid as hell when we brought it back up a few weeks ago and laughed about how naive we were. Honesty, still one of my most favourite things. He dragged on lies like these constantly and he'd do them over the longest periods of time so we could fully believe him.
39. Ya Limey
Am an only child, but my Child Psychology teacher in high school told us about the time she and her siblings were taking a bath. She convinced her brother to drink lime scented shampoo, saying it was lime Kool Aid.
38. When Lies Save Lives
Me and my brother used to eat dog treats as candy sometimes. At some point I figured I would have more if he didn't eat them, so I told him he would turn in to a dog if you ate too much. He never took any after that
37. Dramatically Under The Sea
I accidentally convinced my sister that the sinking of the Titanic didn't happen. She asked me after she saw the movie if the ship really sank, and I sarcastically said "no, they made it up for more drama." She didn't find out I was lying until she came home from school all upset because kids made fun of her for not knowing that the Titanic was real. She was 13.
36. The Worst Kind Of Bilingual People
A friend of mine's father met her mother while he was stationed in Korea, and made the stupid mistake of going to her brother to ask how to say "I love you" in Korean. Older brother was only to happy to oblige, and rattled off a phrase for him to memorize.
Time came to use it, and he discovered that what the brother had actually taught him was a fairly serious insult in Korean. My friend told me that it translated as "Your mother has no pubic hair".
Another friend of mine, who also served in Korea, was once rattling off the various curses that he'd learned while stationed there.
I always found it a little heartwarming that big brothers are jerks, regardless of nationality. We're all part of the same grand, horrible, human tapestry.
35. Poor Mr. Popper
I convinced my brother that penguins don't exist. I started this lie as a joke as soon as he started to learn about animals. I kept it going for 8 years until he got into an argument with his teacher about it. Going to the zoo in that time was really hard though, we always had to avoid the penguins just so I could keep the lie going.
34. Grounded For Life
This isn't a lie I told, but this is still an awesome thing. When my Sis was young, I taught her all the different swear words and when it's valid to use them. I was good for a while until my sister, 5, said "sh**" and when my parents asked where she heard it, she pointed straight at me. Grounded for a week. I was 8. I heard them all through YouTube.
33. The Worst Cocktail
Was probably 10 lil bro was 5 . Convinced him that I put a curse on him, and he had to drink a special smoothie to get rid of it. I had him drink random stuff I found in the kitchen. Hot sauce, mustard, milk, onions, meat. It was nasty, He ended up throwing up and crying to my mom. Good times lmao.
32. Duck Duck Goose
When I was 5 and my little brother was 3 I tricked my brother into thinking I was two different people who looked the same. I would always have a change of clothes with me (I was a messy kid) and would only do this at my grandmother's house and outside, I would wear 1 shirt as me, leave, and come back and play with him as "Duck" (I was 5 and that's the name I stuck with). I stopped doing it after maybe 4 or 6 months and he started getting sad that his friend Duck moved away. I was a mean older brother.
31. Amusement But For Me
When I was around maybe 7 or 8, I convinced my younger sister that she would be teleported to galaxyland (theme park near where we lived at the time) if she went into an empty garbage can and closed the lid. It was one of those old metal stereotypical garbage cans that was hard for a child to open from the outside, nevermind the inside, so cue little sister screaming and crying to be let out and me trying to convince her that it was gonna happen soon. This carried on for about half an hour until out mom came home and I got yelled at for an hour. Now the thing is, soon after I convinced her that the same theme park was actually just a few streets down from our house. She totally believed me and our parents called the police and had to search for her for a while. I somehow managed to talk my way out of it but I really did not like my sister when I was a kid.
30. Kindness Or Cruelty?
I am 8 years older than my youngest brother. When he wanted to play video games as a small child, I would give him an unplugged controller and play with my plugged in controller under a blanket on my lap. These were single player games.
29. The Tooth Fairy
Convinced my sister that the tooth fairy was real after I placed some money under her pillow the first time she lost her tooth. She seemed sad after losing her tooth that day and I wanted to do something to make her happy. So every time she loses a tooth, we put money under her pillow. She still believes in the tooth fairy and I don't think I want to break the news to her.
28. I Didn't Shoot The Sheriff, Or Break The Bed
I was 10 and I was jumping on my parents bed in general being stupid then I broke one of the bed boards, I got so scared to get in trouble I told my then 5 year old little sister that she should play on our parents bed then told her she broke the bed. So she had to tell our parents that she did it, sis if ur reading this sorry it was me
27. Don't Cry Over Spilled Milk
When me and my brother were pretty young ( I was around 4 or 5 and my brother two years younger than me) I spilled a jug of water that my mum had on the bench of the kitchen. I was afraid of getting in trouble for it (which is pretty ridiculous since it was just spilled water). My mum came into the kitchen and asked who spilt it, my brother said I spilt it and vice versa. Eventually it got to the point where we were both in tears, yelling at each other. At this point my mum is fed up and she sends both of us to our shared room and tells us that we were allowed to come out when someone owned up to doing it.
So I know at this point, I will get in trouble if I own up and I'm not willing to do that. I convince/lie to my younger brother who was around three at the time, so not very smart, that mum won't get him in trouble if he owns up. He then proceeds to own up and gets into big trouble for lying to mum about spilling the water. I can't exactly remember what his punishment was, but I remember feeling pretty guilty about it for the following weeks.
26. Goats Only
Telling my lil bratty sis that I bought her for 1000$ in a secret place in Saudi Arabia at the age of 2 when she was a newborn therefore I am her mom so she must listen to me. She doesn't believe me so it's more like convincing. I am trying to brainwash her but im unsuccessful, at present.
And that the plushie toy lions she sees are real and will eat her. When I was 3/4 and she was 1/2. Well, my sis got terrified then one day, our parents gave us 2 plushies but we had to pick one. There was a goat and lion. My sis chose the goat but I wanted it then she said "You tell me that lion is real!!" (In my language). I screamed and shoved the lion in her face which made her cry then in the end I had to pick the lion.
All lies have some sort of consequences, kids.
25. Played Yourself
I'm big sis. Scared my lil sis at the beach, said narwhals were in the water and would come after her. She believed me. What I wasn't counting on was I believed me too. We were both scared to go in ahha
24. Galleria Of Lies
Me and most of my sibs are adopted, my younger brother was about 3-4 and I told him that he wasn't really adopted but that my mother bought him at the mall. Every single time we went to the mall I would say she was going to return him. He would freak out and not want to go so my mom would drop him at grandma's or at daycare so she didn't have to deal with a crying kid in the mall and I would get to go with my mom. To this day he hates going to the mall but doesn't really know why.
23. To Quell
When my brother was little and my mother went out for groceries my brother used to cry and I couldn't get him to be quiet, so I used to tell him the story of the old man. In the place where I lived there was an old man who was mentally ill. Everyone was scared of him and that were mostly kids. I always said to my brother that if you don't stop crying the old man will hear you and will come to take you away so you'll never see mom again. I feel sorry now but I was also a kid so I didn't thing about his feelings at all. The old man was scary but as long as you didn't talk to him or watch him than he did nothing
22. Aural Prison
I once told my little brother that there's a limit on how much noise you're allowed to make over the course of your life. Once you go over the limit, you have to go into a nursing home, because they're jails for loud people. I also told him that he was very close to his lifetime limit because of how loud he is, and if he doesn't want to be the only four year old in the nursing home, he should only whisper from then on. There was more to it, but that was the gist of it.
21. Value Down
My older brother convinced my younger brother that 2p coins were worth more than £1 coins because they were bigger, so my little bro would swap all his £1 coins with him.
20. Air Displaced
Not the older sibling, but I told my younger cousin that every time he smells someone's fart the air that was in their butt is now in his lungs. And told that same cousin that God was just as real as Santa Claus, the Easter bunny, and tooth fairy; and this was before figured out that Santa, tooth fairy, etc didn't exist.
19. Religious Doctrine
I used to tell my sister that Santa only comes to your house if you're Christian and you only go to heaven if you're baptised.
That second one wasn't technically a lie, but she constantly begged our parents to be baptised out of fear of going to hell. We're not even catholic.
18. Ole Kris Kringle
I told my younger brother that I had seen Santa and the Easter Bunny because I was too smart and figured out that they weren't real at the young age of 6, he's also not the brightest so it lasted till he was about 9 because my mum straight up said "Don't tell any of your younger cousins that Santa isn't real because they don't know yet.", I was furious because he didn't know either. I tried really hard to make him believe and my mum did absolutely. Nothing.
17. When It Works Too Well
I scared the crap out of them once by taking them both into their room (they are twins and shared a room at the time) and told them that I'm not actually their brother and rather an assassin/spy sent there to eliminate them if they ever got out of hand or misbehaved. They are 9 now and still slightly believe it even though I told them it was a joke afterwards
16. Nose Strolls
I told my 7yo sister one time that when she went to sleep her boogers would walk out of her nose and go in her hair. She legitimately cried because she was scared so she told our mom and mom had to tell her it was a lie. But let me tell you, the reaction was priceless
15. Regurgitated Food
Not me, but my Dad to his younger brother. He told him that mashed potatoes were mashed by people chewing potatoes up. My uncle has refused to eat mash potatoes since.
14. Snail Sounds
I started telling my little brother that snails said meow and showed him "evidence" videos from SpongeBob. He wasn't too sure at first but my parents found it so hilarious that they joined in and after that he was very convinced for about a year.
13. Holy NipsGiphy
That Jesus had really big nipples. "Read" it to her from a children's Bible when she was four. She still sings songs about it and insists on it whenever the topic comes up. She's going to a Catholic elementary school soon, wish her luck.
12. A Fake Adoption
I made fake adoption papers and "hid" them in my parents' room. My brother had already been asking if he was adopted since he looks nothing like our parents (he looks more like our grandparents). He's not, but I told him I was too young to remember an adoption. I then let him know that our parents "hide" important papers in X location in their room. He found the fake papers, really freaked out and my parents about killed me.
11. Free Gardening
Animal Crossing on GameCube, I let my brother move in to my village. I told him the main goal of the game is to pick all the weeds. My village looked great.
10. An Organization Of Santas
I had my little brother believing in Santa Claus probably until nearly 9 years old because I told him the actual ruse is that its not a single Santa but an organization of Santas worldwide that operate in unison. I told him that mall Santas were local people who had been deputized, but had every bit the authority and jurisdiction of the Santa org and so if you were bad, mall Santa had every right and capability to ruin your Christmas.
He also asked me about squeezing down chimneys, eating cookies and milk, and reindeer. I told him the reindeer were real back in the 1800's, back when there were a lot less people in America ("like 5000 or so") so reindeer made sense for method of transport. Cookies were basically like gratuity for the gift giving. Nothing is free after all!
The chimney one I always just went somber. "Oh no. That one is real. Very very real." But I wouldn't say more.
I told them that birds have mini hands that are hidden on their chest that would hold eggs and enable them to transport it safely.
8. The Terminator Movies
I told my brother that people who die in movies are actors who die in real life for it.
I forgot all about that comment, until months later when my brother commented when watching one of the Terminator movies; "I don't understand these people, why would they die just to get to be in a movie?"
7. The Lion KingGiphy
Growing up I didn't like the Lion King. I was like 5 or 6 at the time. My little sister, however, loved it and would always pick it when it was her turn to choose a movie. I found it way too sad and dreaded watching it. As everyone knows who has seen it, the movie ends the way it begins - with the birth of a lion.
So I would always have it start at the ending sequence. My little sister thought that the Lion King was only 5 min for a long time.
6. The Cool Older Brother
Told my little sister for years as a teenager that I would sneak out every weekend with my friends. It was a straight up lie. I had virtually no friends at the time, and I had snuck out once to a party (only one I ever got invited to) at that point and hadn't done it again. But it felt good to be the cool older brother with a story to tell.
Well, she went and told her neighbor friend that I would do this, and he told his mom who then told my mom. My mom confronted me in front of both of them and I immediately gathered what happened.
Admitting that I lied about it and was lame with no actual friends would have been worse than taking the punishment, so I willingly got grounded for like 6 weeks for something I didn't do just so I still looked cool.
I convinced my brother he had a uterus and he had to name it. He named it Debbie.
4. To The Moon
My dad had some old Apollo 11 memorabilia and and an actual letter from NASA. They sent him some moon maps, posters, some really cool stuff. Anyway, I showed this to my younger sibling at the time she was probably 6 or 7, and I told her my parents planned on sending her the moon when she gets older and that she better start preparing to leave now.
She didn't believe me, until I showed her the map. That's when she started to panic. And then I showed her the letter, and that's when I realized I took it too far because she started to cry. I still bring it up from time to time.
3. Brown Eyes
I convinced my younger sister that she was adopted because she has brown eyes. My brother and I have green eyes. She actually believed it from ages 6-15.
She blew up on our Mom one day, because "You NEVER told me I was ADOPTED." Luckily, I wasn't living at home when that came out. In my defense, I seriously thought she would have realized some time over the years that our Mom had brown eyes.
2. The Bocci Ball Long Con
Oh man, do I have an answer for this! I still bring it up all the time.
I told my younger sister that Bocci Ball is a full contact sport. I told her the rules were that you had 2 teams and point were racked up by carrying the small white ball, the longer your team had the ball the better. The opposing team could get points by knocking the ball out of your hand.
How would they knock it out you ask? Why, by throwing the larger colored balls at you. The opposing team could then grab the white ball and start amassing the points themselves.
Now, if you're not familiar with Bocci ball, the balls are all very VERY hard and playing it this way would easily crush bones.
Anyway, she only kinda believed at first, but I kept to the story any time or reason I could.
Finally, years later, her gym class is going to do a day playing Bocci.
She refuses, apparently making a stink about how she refuses to play because she doesn't want to get hurt and somehow no one seems to ask her why she thinks she'll get hurt. She keeps digging until finally someone tells her the real rules.
Not an earth shattering lie, but it was a good long con and the whole family still get a good laugh out of it.
1. When Pigs FlyGiphy
Told my younger sister that pigs are born with wings but the farmers cut them off so they don't fly away. This is where the phrase "when pigs fly" comes from. I completely forgot about this little lie until a couple years later when she came home from elementary school furious because she's talked about the pigs with wings with her science teacher and got schooled.
25 years later and she still buys me an occasional flying pig as a joke.
Perhaps the best thing about our friends is that we can always rely on them.
To help us out, to give us words of comfort and wisdom when we need them, or to just be a willing pair of ears.
Even so, our friends still have a way of surprising us, as well as disappointing us from time to time.
Sometimes they'll do things that just make us groan and roll our eyes but are easily forgiven over time.
Other times, however, they might do or say something which can only be described as "f*cked up."
Potentially putting an effective end to your friendship.
"What is the most f**ked up thing you've seen a friend do?"
Those Poor Cats...
"A guy I worked with was about to take his wife on a trip back to their mutual hometown in another state."
"They had a pair of delightful kittens and they asked me if I would watch them while they were gone."
"I had little experience with cats but these 2 were just wonderfully playful."
"I gave him a call when he got back to arrange returning the kittens but he said they had picked up a non-cat friendly dog on the journey and he would just drop off the kittens in the woods."
"Needless to say, I kept them and they were wonderful furry friends for me and eventually to my wife and kids."
"I still think what would have happened to them if I had not been in the right place at the right time."- PoloGrounder
"I went on holiday for a week and asked my 'best friend' to pop in and feed my cat (he lived a few doors away)."
"When I got back, my cat was laying by the back door of my house, went inside and his bowl was empty, I called him and asked when the last time he fed him, he said 'oh yeah, I forgot'."
"My cat had been outside for a week with no food or water. "
"I haven't spoken to him in 12 years."- Reddit
Always Listen To Your Doctor
"Convinced his girlfriend she was suffering from gluten intolerance instead of schizophrenia, and got her to stop taking medication."- lightningandmadness
But Was It A Point Worth Proving?
"Deliberately get knocked down by a car, in order to prove that when drunk (and we were very drunk), his bones were flexible."
"Fortunately, the car had been slowing to turn."
"There followed a couple of minutes trying to reassure the driver he was ok, whilst calling him an idiot."
"Meanwhile, he was laying flat on his back, maintaining he'd proved his point."- anothercynicaloldgit
It Is Never Attractive To Gloat
"Best friend was excited for me to meet his new gf."
"The whole evening he bragged about how she was still married and he was going to be the reason she got divorced."
"Haven't spoken to him since."
"Did hear she broke up with him and sorted out the issues with her husband."- hmfiddlesworth
Karma Is Pretty Unforgiving...
"Brought my friend to watch my boyfriend practice his drumming."
"She kept spreading her legs wide wearing a skirt with no underwear."
"She slept with him and he left me thinking he would be with her."
"Needless to say she didn’t date him because she already had a boyfriend."- Final_Objective_6204Kar
"We were working in an old lady's attic and he kicked the sh*t out of a pipe on purpose then went and told her it needed to be replaced."
"I never worked with him again after that."- FriendlyDifference72
"Brag about a then—boyfriend not leaving her despite constant cheating."
"Then cry when he left her."
"I don’t know either."- Snapesnape716
In With The Wrong Crowd
"They were arguing and he made fun of the friend for being an orphan."
"Tried to stab the other friend cuz his ex was crushing on him."- we_are_ghetto
Not Worth A Second Thought
"Throw McDonald’s fries and burger as hard as he could at a homeless lady asking for food."
"I called him a piece of sh*t and never spoke to him again."- Mundane_Tour_3215
You Don't Mess With Family...
"My best friend had just broken up with my brother—who had moved over a thousand miles and changed jobs to be with her—citing personal differences."
"My brother was devastated, but I tried to respect her decision and be a source of support for both of them, especially because they truly weren’t the best fit."
"But then she shared with me, because she knew that I loved her and would be happy for her so long as she was happy, that she’d been cheating on my brother for the past month and had found her soulmate."
"The depth of my brother’s heartbreak, already immense, was further compounded by the infidelity."
"To my bewilderment, she truly couldn’t understand why I was ending the friendship, seemed so distraught that I would end a years long relationship over something so 'small'."
"And I still can’t comprehend why she thought telling me would result in anything other than a complete door slam."
"Hannah, you still suck."
"And I’m still angry."
"I had also asked her to be the maid of 'honor' in my upcoming wedding."
Some friendships can withstand fundamental differences of opinion.
But no friendship is worth hanging onto when people (and kittens) are physically or emotionally harmed.
When you gotta go, you go.
That should be a mantra for getting rid of the toxic people in our lives.
Not every relationship is meant to last forever.
Some people don't know how to be friends.
They are awfully good at pretending though.
Be vigilant of the signs and red flags.
Toxic people are crafty.
And once you're free, never look back.
Redditor _ReDd1T_UsEr wanted to discuss the reasons why many of us decided to cut some people out of our lives, so they asked:
"What was the reason why your friendship ended with someone?"
Sometimes a person just has to go.
Planning StagesWeekend Sunday GIF by DisneyGiphy
"I stopped being the first to always initiate plans, and that was that."
"I once asked a friend to plan our next breakfast + walk outing, since I always did that. He wrote me a letter ending the friendship. Stunning!"
Pants on Fire
"Habitual lying became too annoying and disruptive to tolerate."
"When you constantly are thinking... this math ain't matching lol. People that lie all the time make me sick. I've told multiple friends that you don't have to lie to me."
"I feel so much better when someone can trust me and feel comfortable telling me a hard truth than an easy lie."
"Even if the truth made me feel some type of way, I'm still glad it was honest. I've even said thank you to people in the past that have been honest with me, good or bad! Some people just can not help lying about things. I wouldn't be able to ever keep a story straight if I did that."
"He kept having kids with different girls and bailing on them. Coming from a 'went out for a pack of smokes' Dad myself, I just couldn't watch it anymore. Bailed after the third one. Think he's up to 6 now."
"Reminds me of one of my ex-friends. She kept having kids with MULTIPLE guys (all of them were one-night stands), I don't think she even knows who the baby daddies are."
"She also kept begging me and people for money for pot, and she also bragged about having OnlyFans. She'd also make up stories about being in an abusive relationship with her boyfriend (she'd also cheat on him/tell people her and him they broke up, which they weren't)."
"I was a bad person and they ended it for perfectly sensible reasons. I would have done the same. I've changed, but I don't blame them for not reconsidering contact."
"I’ve been there. I was a bad person and lost friendships and family relationships. I tried to apologize to everyone I hurt."
"I also accepted that they don’t want me in their lives anymore. I learned that I made my mistakes, I learned from them, and I accept their choices. I don’t self-hate anymore and I try to be a better person in general. I hope you are doing well and practicing self-love and forgiveness."
Money IssuesDonald Duck Money GIFGiphy
"I lent them $20 and then they avoided me so they didn’t have to pay me back. Worth the $20."
"I don't ever expect prompt returns of small amounts of money between my friends... we all buy each other rounds or buy the food for the BBQ or whatever. It ends up evening out over time I think we'd notice though if someone was always taking and never giving and then they'd probably get cut off too."
In the immortal words of Cyndi Lauper... "Money Changes Everything."
Lack of SupportHappy Planning GIFGiphy
"She joined a pyramid scheme selling butt-ugly leggings and it took over her whole life. When I finally told her it was negatively affecting our friendship, she accused me of not supporting her 'business.'"
"I was basically a taxi for my friends so I dumped them all."
"This one I can understand but depends on the situation. Not all of my friends had cars in high school, so our group needed to have me and my sh*tty '94 Plymouth Sundance come, or they couldn't do anything. I didn't mind at all then, but I definitely would these days."
"I remember I used to drive around with my buddies all the time before they had licenses. When one of my friends got his and a car I said sweet now you can drive me around for a bit, he replied that he wasn't gonna waste his money on gas like that. See ya, haven't really spoken to him since."
"How's this for oddly specific: Friend since 1980, was hanging out at a bar in 1992 and there was a dispute of over a $15.00 bar tab. I was in the right, but whatever - he held a grudge for years."
"Ran into him in 2017 and we were both too old to care. Started to see each other now and then. 2023 and we're at this local bar for a show and got into a fight about $15.00 a ticket."
"Maybe he'll call me in 2063."
"She was a taker, constantly. When I needed something she made it about her yet again. Exhausting to be around."
"I'm going through this right now. Can't tell you how many texts I have from her in the past few days telling me that I need to get over myself, need to stop making myself the victim, have been a terrible friend, have never been there for her."
"She's the most narcissistic person I know and everyone does everything for her. She has one of the easiest lives ever and anytime anything bad happens to her she believes that everyone is against her and she's the victim here. It's pure insanity. There is no talking sense to people like this."
Life Changespoint pointing GIF by Shalita GrantGiphy
"I've lost like all but two of my 'friends' because I stopped drinking and doing hard drugs."
"Same here dude. My circle is small but hey at least it's a circle I know I can go to."
Oh, how things change when the booze dries up.
How much fun were you really having?
Do you have any stories about cutting off a friend? Let us know in the comments below.
People Who've Attended A Wedding Where Someone Actually Objected Share Their Experiences
There's nothing quite like the drama that can arise at a wedding or in the days leading up to it.
But the moment people don't necessarily think about is the moment when the audience can choose to object if they so choose, and surprisingly, some people take advantage of this opportunity. It often doesn't go well.
Redditor AustinMakesStuff asked:
"Has anyone ever been to a wedding where someone actually objected, and if so, how did that go?"
"I went to a wedding where they skipped that part because the bride's adult daughter was planning to object."
"How was this known? Had she pre-announced her intention, or was she just that kind of person and people had accurately predicted it?"
"She told somebody, and they told the bride and groom."
Uncovering the Con Artist
"I feel like about half of weddings these days don't have that part, and not because of feared objections, just because it is outdated and weird. Premarital sex is a thing. Divorce is a thing."
"Weddings cost like over $10k; if you know reasons to stop a marriage (outside of movies), you need to intervene at the engagement or earlier, not during the ceremony."
"That said, one of my wife's college roommates canceled a wedding like a day or two days beforehand, right after graduating college, after being in a long-distance relationship with some guy for a year or so. Her family was quite well-off and she was dating a guy who lavished gifts and expensive dates on her whenever they were together, said he ran his own company, just bought them a fancy house, etc."
"It turns out he was just super in debt, working a near minimum wage job, and maxing out credit cards taken out fraudulently. He had a fake web page with other employees for his company that he set up for the sole purpose of keeping up the front. The house was only bought from grossly lying about income (pre-2007 housing crisis) on the mortgage application, and he was drowning in debt."
"The almost-bride's father got bad vibes about the guy (a few things didn't add up, like he had this fancy house but couldn't afford any furniture), and he hired a PI (Personal Investigator) who quickly uncovered the deception."
"(And she didn't break up with him because he wasn't rich, she broke up because he spent tons of effort to lie about everything and was completely conning her and just trying to get her roped into joint ownership of his debt via marriage that he expected the family to pay off.)"
"My husband's first marriage. The brother of the bride stood up and said to my husband, 'Say no, you can still be happy!'"
"They went through with the marriage and wound up divorcing with a messy breakup."
"Brother-in-law is still best friends with my husband (as far as he's concerned, he gained a brother and lost a sister, and is better off for it), and he never lets him forget the fact that he was right and he should have bailed, lol (laughing out loud)."
"My auntie's fiance was already married (a lady stood up waving the marriage certificate), so the wedding didn't go ahead. The reception was on a long boat so we still went to that."
"The fiance went back to his home country to sort it out and never came back."
"I worked a wedding where one of the moms objected, but I think the groom knew that the parent was going to say something, so they just responded with, 'Oh sit down, (parents name), we knew you didn't like this a year ago and clearly we're not going to change our minds today."'
"The wedding continued like nothing happened, but the mom was lowkey shunned and people avoided her at the reception."
Going Separate Ways
"This was in America, and the wedding was in a Buddhist temple. The parents of the groom stood up and objected because they didn’t believe the bride was of the same class. They spoke in another language so most of the English-speaking guests didn’t know they were objecting."
"My husband was the best man and those closest to the couple knew this might happen. The Buddhist priest said he would handle it if the parents tried anything."
"After the parents spoke for a while, the priest said to the groom, 'You’ve heard what your parents had to say, what do you want to do?'"
"The groom replied, 'I want to marry my bride.'"
"So the priest asked the parents to leave."
"At this point, the rest of the guests are clueing in that this was not a nice part of the ceremony, and that the parents were actually objecting, so, as the parents walked out, some of the guests were berating them saying things like, 'You should be ashamed of yourself,' and 'How could you do that?' Even though the groom was not happy with his parents, that was very hard for him to hear."
"That was 30 years ago. The couple is still married. They have two beautiful, successful children. After the groom’s mom passed away, the groom’s father came around and was involved in their lives until he died."
Not Meant to Be
"A woman, in her twenties at the time, objected to her mom marrying my uncle. So she started yelling, 'Mom, don’t marry him!' during the ceremony."
"The ceremony proceeded, and some family on the mom’s side lead the daughter away to quit interrupting."
"I don’t blame her. My uncle was a lying, lazy bast**d. The marriage didn’t last."
The Best Man Swap
"I went to a wedding where the best man was replaced a week before because he banged the bride. But the wedding still went ahead just with a different best man. They are divorced now."
Joke Gone Wrong
"I went to a Catholic wedding where, when the priest asked this question, one of the groomsmen did a VERY loud, long, throat clearing, which got everyone laughing."
"Everyone except for the bride's elderly Italian Grandmother, who marched out of her seat and angrily hit the groomsman with her handbag and shouted at him in Italian!"
Giving Away the Bride
"I objected. I took giving my sister away literally."
"I wasn't the brightest three-year-old."
Wedding Invitation Revenge
"At my cousin's wedding, her friend said, 'I object,' because she was not invited to the wedding. She was kicked out of the wedding."
"Not quite the question as asked, but too funny to not share:"
"Priest: 'Any objections?'"
"Father of the bride: lets out the hardest, loudest, most complex-sounding sneeze I've ever heard in my life, completely with involuntarily saying, 'ACHOOOOOO!'"
"Mother of the bride, hammered on champagne: 'For f**k's sake, Jerry!'"
"It took a good five minutes for everyone to regain their composure."
The Bride Who Got Away
"I had a friend who was a minister, and the subject came up if he asked the question during ceremonies he officiated."
"He laughed and said no way. He basically tells the couple not to include it because it only invites a moment of anxiety at best, misery at worst."
"His best story (and one of the reasons he stopped including the question) was about a couple where in the lead-up to the wedding, the couple was obviously in love. The bride-to-be was very smiley and happy."
"But the day of the wedding, she was stone-faced. He (my minister friend) knew something is up because he’d never seen her like this and he asked if she was okay. She just said, 'I’m fine.'"
"Right before the service, he asked again, and 'I’m fine.'"
"He got to the question, 'Does anyone object to this union?'"
"The bride reached over, grabbed the Maid of Honor's hand, shoved her into the bride’s spot, and said, 'You’re screwing him, you marry him.'"
"Then she stormed out of the church."
An Unforgettable Toast
"At his rehearsal dinner, a coworker's mother's toast included that his soon-to-be wife was a 'd**n dirty w**re who wasn't good enough' for her son. Folks were not happy. (The video ended so didn't see the whole thing.)"
"At the wedding which I attended, his mom started to say something at the 'speak now or' part but was silenced by her daughter. Mom left and didn't see the rest of the ceremony."
"Everything about that poor guy was drama."
"Attended a wedding where the minister said something along the lines of, 'If anyone here objects to this marriage, you can keep your mouth shut. Today is not about you.'"
Bonus: Funeral Shenanigans
"Not a wedding, but at a funeral someone objected to the death."
"At my uncle’s funeral, his ex-wife and a local church [cult] leader tried to raise him from the dead. We were all sitting there like normal people at a normal funeral and she walks up to the casket and starts yelling, 'James Lester, raise up!'"
"I didn’t know she was there or I would’ve prepared myself for shenanigans. Also, I didn’t know my uncle’s middle name was Lester, so please imagine the confusion. So she and the cult leader are literally yelling at my uncle’s body."
"Not surprisingly, my uncle refused to resurrect himself. They were escorted out."
"I’ve actually never told this story because it makes my family look insane."
The last thing a person wants is for their to be drama on their wedding day, but like any other major event, sometimes something will come up. But having someone try to put a stop to the wedding, in front of everyone, certainly will add a terrible note to the wedding day.
Financially speaking, most of us could benefit greatly from having extra money each month.
But where someone might assume that the extra money would just be wasted, most people would apply these funds to very practical purposes and expenditures.
Redditor dothepingu asked:
"What would you do if you had an extra $1,000 every month?"
"A couple of weeks ago, I went to the dentist and overheard a heartbreaking situation."
"The office had a very open floor plan with privacy screens rather than individual rooms. But you could still hear every single conversation."
"This teenage kid comes in and says that he has a broken crown that needs to be fixed."
"The dentist says that it will cost $700. Kid says he has to call his mom first."
"So the kid calls the mom, and the mom says, 'No way in h**l can we afford that. Just tell the dentist to stick the old one back on.'"
"The dentist is like, 'Are you sure? That's not really a thing. It's just gonna break off again.'"
"The mom says too bad, he has to live with it."
"If I had an extra $1000, I would have picked up that tab for that kid."
"Pay off debts and save."
"Exactly my thoughts, start actually being able to plan things and save money rather than being on the back foot all the time."
"Absolutely. Money just helps so much for lowering stress!"
"I'd ask my husband to take more time off work. We don't need the extra money, I'd rather have his company."
"Save more money and continue with my current lifestyle, except maybe also be able to get eye surgery for my worsening vision."
A Little Self-Care
"I'd start actually getting my hair cut and colored by someone that's not me at 3:00 AM feeling brave."
"I feel attacked by this comment, it feels personally directed at me."
"Be able to take care of my and my wife's mental health a h**l of a lot better."
"Her therapy is important but expensive. I would love to make sure she had more appointments and the best care."
Time to Retire
"Retire. 1000 USD per month is LIFE CHANGING in the Philippines."
"Probably move out of my uncle's shed."
"Make an extra mortgage payment; pay off this house twice as fast."
"I'd try out that three meals per day trend that people talk about."
"I'd settle for one meal a day and not living in my car."
"Dude. Been there for six months. One day we'll make it big. We'll sleep on a mattress and eat TWO meals a day."
"I'd work fewer hours. I've been here for 32 years and haven't been able to take a vacation in over four years."
Providing for Family
"My mom recently became single, with three kids and a grandkid at home. She and two of the kids who live with her are unable to work because of severe health problems."
"I know she is constantly terrified about how she's going to pay the bills. I'd give her the $1,000 each month in a heartbeat."
Man's Best Friend
"I'd finally be able to afford a dog."
"Live instead of survive."
While there are millionaires in the world, or even just people who live very comfortably, most people are currently living paycheck-to-paycheck, give or take a few hundred dollars. And that $1,000 extra each month would make all the difference.