People Share The Best Dad Jokes They Have Ever Heard
Hero Images/Getty Images

Dad jokes can feel like the unloved step-sibling of the comical world. "Why would we laugh at something so obvious and stupid?"

Becuase it's hilarious, that's why. Just check out the following entries below and see for yourself.


Reddit user, u/GrotiusandPufendorf, wanted to know what the funniest jokes on the planet are when they asked:

What is your favorite dad joke?

A Murder Of Cows?

Dad: Look at that flock of cows over there.

Kids: A HERD of cows.

Dad: Of course I heard of cows, there is a flock of them right over there.

Note: pulled that joke successfully a few times, and my kids even did it to their summer camp instructor.

ManOfLaBook

We Should Probably Leaf

Giphy

At the park with my girls: "Dad, can we go play?"

Me: "sure, just stay away from those trees over there"

Girls: " umm...ok, why?"

Me: " I don't know...they look a little shady to me."

Good for producing eye rolls

Fleurdelis502

What Better Way To Carry It Home

"Would you like the milk in the bag?"

Dad: "No thanks, you can keep it in the carton."

Captain-Yesh

Scrambled Or Over-Easy?

Dad at breakfast: I'll have bacon and eggs, please

Waiter: How do you like your eggs?

Dad: I don't know, I haven't gotten them yet!

roman12325

Feeling The Humor

Dad: "Nice shirt, is that felt?"

Not Dad: "No."

Dad: Reaches over and touches sleeve "It is now!"

Cheese_Pancakes

That Joke Killed!

Why do graveyards have gates?

Because people are dying to get in.

My Dad always told it passing a graveyard.

Vlaed

Lean Back. Lean Back.

"I love my furniture. My recliner and I go way back."

akaShadezz11

Stating The Obvious, But Still Hilarious

I had a terrible day yesterday. As I was walking home, a man in a wheelchair stole my camouflage jacket!

As he was wheeling away, I shouted after him, "you can hide but you can't run!"

Jantra

Give It A Second...

A magician was walking down the street.

Then, he turned into a grocery store.

aworldwithoutshrimp

Car Humor. That's All.

Dad putting car in reverse

Dad: Ahh, this takes me back

Hkatsupreme

That's Always The Point

Giphy

Not a joke in the traditional sense but, when I'm at a restaurant and the waitress says "Do you wanna box for that?" I always reply with "No, but I'll wrestle you for it."

No one ever gets it but it makes me laugh. And that's the point, right?

bdoz138

And the King of Them All...?

I tell dad jokes.

Sometimes he laughs.

Moleskin21

People Explain Which Words Just Sound Inappropriate
Ben White/Unsplash

We're all adults who are totally mature and don't, at all, giggle a little bit on the inside when someone talks about what conditions are like on Uranus.

Yeah just kidding, that's hilarious.

Uranus is our favorite heavenly body.

Keep reading...Show less
People Break Down The Most Disgusting Bad Habits
Robert Recker/GettyImages

As much as people try to put on a good face in public, many of them have idiosyncratic behavior–like involuntary foot-tapping–they are ashamed of having.

Keep reading...Show less
People Share Their Favorite Curse World Alternatives
Photo by Usman Yousaf on Unsplash

People have different levels of tolerance when it comes to profanity.

And some people can't stand the sound of rude or vulgar language so much that they can't bring themselves to say these naughty words themselves.

But when anyone reaches a high level of anger or frustration, they still might need a verbal outlet.

And instead find themselves coming up with an alternative word, which helps them release their anger, but won't offend any nearby ears.

Redditor No-Citron5628 was curious to hear people's favorite alternatives to curse words, leading them to ask:

"What is your best swear word alternative?"
Keep reading...Show less
People Share The Most Bada** Villain Quotes Of All-Time
Photo by Sander Sammy on Unsplash

When we think of iconic movie quotes, there are several which come instantly to mind.

"Here's looking at you, kid."

"Love is never having to say you're sorry."

"I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse."

Appropriately, the ones that might haunt us the most, are those delivered by villains, who linger in our memories not only by their creepy attire and presence but by their devious choice of words.

Frightening us long after the credits stop rolling.

Redditor N_the_character was eager to hear what the Reddit community considered the best quotes from both Hollywood's legendary villains, as well as some lesser-known antagonists from film, TV, and video games, leading them to ask:

"What's the most bada** villain quote?"

Benedict from Last Action Hero

"Benedict to youg Danny in 'Last Action Hero':"

"I should tell you that I have killed people smarter and younger than you."- S-Markt

last action hero art GIF by xponentialdesignGiphy

Donquixote Doflamingo

"Pirates are evil?"

"The Marines are righteous?"

"These terms have always changed throughout the course of history!"

"Kids who have never seen peace and kids who have never seen war have different values!"

"Those who stand at the top determine what's wrong and what's right!"

"This very place is neutral ground!"

"Justice will prevail, you say?"

"But of course it will!"

"Whoever wins this war becomes justice!"- TimeisaLie

The Man with the Midas Touch...

"Goldfinger after Bond says 'Do you expect me to talk?'

"'No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die'."- Hunk_Studly

Interrupting GIF by James Bond 007Giphy

The Last Airbender's Azula

"Dai Li: 'You've beaten me at my own game'."

"Azula: 'Don't flatter yourself. You were never even a player'."- herculesmeowlligan

Inigo Montoya, watch out!

"'Good Heavens, are you still trying to win?'"

"-the six fingered man."

Video game villains shouldn't be forgotten, ask Ghaul

“'You are not brave, you’ve merely forgotten the fear of death'."

"'Allow me to reacquaint you'.”- KentuckyBourbon94

The Good, the Bad, and the one-liners

"'When you have to shoot, shoot'."

"'Don't talk'."

"Tuco, 'The Good, The Bad and The Ugly'."- jpablo680

Whiterose of Mr. Robot

“'Because Phillip, I had to ask you twice'.”- Lontano64

The final frontier indeed...

"'A true victory is to make your enemy see they were wrong to oppose you in the first place'."

"'To force them to acknowledge your greatness'."

"Gul Dukat, Deep Space Nine."- hamdingers

Deep Space Nine Dislike GIF by Star TrekGiphy

A true villain will have you quaking in your boots with just one look.

But it's with their words that they really get you.

And how they instantly go from being merely villains, to legends.