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People Explain How A Romantic Gesture Instantly Backfired On Them

People Explain How A Romantic Gesture Instantly Backfired On Them
Image by Jill Wellington from Pixabay

Chocolates, flowers, and love notes are overrated.

While it's the thought that counts, letting the object of your affection know how you feel about them requires more creative thought to make a lasting impression.


However, not everything goes according to plan.

Being witnesses to a sad proposal, having flowers rejected due to skepticism, and a painful attempt at a strip tease were just some examples of botched declarations of love when Redditor Nzui_254 asked:

"What romantic gesture did you try to make that instantly and horribly backfired on you?"
Sometimes, even Cupid's aim is off the mark.

The Crushed Secret Admirer

"Wrote a letter to a crush on Valentine's Day. Signed it as his Secret Admirer and left it in his locker. Watched him open it. Still reading, he starts to approach me. I tense up."

"He goes, 'Its402Am...look at this...it's from Angeline. She wants to get back with me!'"

"No idea how the discussion of the letter went down but they totally got back together."

Its402am

The Love Concussion

"Took a date to a club; tried to do the tilt back while I hold her back, I dropped her. Married 7 years now..."

icelands_miracle

What Happens When You Over-Share

"Came to my wife for a hug...started out with an awww that's so sweet. Then I made the mistake of over sharing that I had asked one kid to watch a movie and another to play a game and no one wanted to do anything. Then she pipes up, oh so I'm third?! Fuuuuuuuuuuuuu*k."

Eternal-Guard

Sad Witnesses

"I surprised my wife on Valentine's Day with a dinner at one of my wife's favorite restaurants that's really hard to get into. It was a crazy expensive three course dinner and the food was amazing. However... we got seated in a corner of the restaurant with our table and one other table that was about two feet away. We we were seated about the same time as the couple next to us. After about 5 minutes the guy gets down on one knee and my wife and I being 2 feet away are basically front row and start to clap... but the girl bursts into tears and says no. They then proceeded to eat dinner for the next hour, both crying the whole time. My wife and I pretty much ate our meal in awkward silence and couldn't really leave as we had to wait for each course."

WhiskeyVagabond

Wrong Window

"My SO and I had a fight in college. So to apologize, the next day, I printed out a bunch of cute/funny memes and taped them to his dorm window."

"I texted him, told him to look out his window. 'Why?'"

"It was the wrong window. I was tampering with a strangers window. And probably freaked them the f'ck out. When I explained to my SO my f'ck up and we hurriedly went to take them off the window, the blinds were open lmao."

OurChoicesMakeUs

Mocking Chivalry

"In a thunderstorm I offered the girl I was on a date with my rain jacket (as a true gentleman should); we then both ran to her car. When we got there she was totally dry (fantastic rain jacket) and I was dripping wet from head to toe."

"She laughed at me for being so stupid as to give my rain jacket away. We broke up because she thought I was so dumb."

"Suppose I did dodge a bullet there."

Captain_Coco_Koala

No More Flowers Just Because

"Randomly bought my wife flowers. Big mistake. First thing she said was what had I done wrong, if I was buying her flowers, I must have done something wrong. No amount of having done nothing wrong could convince her. Oh, well lesson learned."

BulgarianSheepFeta

It Didn't Go Down Well

"I took my Ex to a pub (yes im british) and we were going to have a lovely pub lunch."

"she ordered the chicken in white wine sauce, i had the lamb... the lamb was raw and the chicken in white wine sauce hadn't been cooked properly so it was basically raw chicken and alcohol in a bowl."

"i complained and got a refund with the guy behind the bar saying 'yeah, its the cheifs last day and he was being let go' and followed on with 'his mate behind the bar over heard the conversation and told him before the shift, we have been handing out refunds left and right'"

"so i dropped my Ex off at hers and had to speed all the way home for what is commonly known as a 'photo finish' to get my a** on the toilet before all holy hell fell out of my god forsaken hoop, so head in sink vomiting and my arse leaking like a sieve, needless to say my grand romantic gesture lead to 2 people having the worst food poisoning of the young adult lives... the place closed down almost over night and i believe is under new management now."

Empty-Refrigerator

The Note

"Spontaneously bought flowers to be delivered to my new wife while I was at work. When I got home she was fuming and had obviously been crying. Instead of a hug like I had been picturing all day, she greeted me by throwing a handful of ashtray smelling greens and stomping out of the room between half packed moving boxes."

"Turns out the driver had smoked cigarettes on the way over and besides the smoke smell there were some ashes on the bouquet. More awful though, I had asked that the note say 'I'm happy for the wonderful time we've known each other.' The note actually said 'It's been nice knowing you.'"

Sunlight72

Love-struck Teen

"I wrote a poem for a girl when I was in high school at a summer camp (it was like a 4 week camp and idk what I was thinking honestly - lovestruck teenager). Her room was below and adjacent to mine and and my neighbor (directly above her room) happened to be somebody she talked to about things (like a brother relationship, he had a girlfriend at the time) and she decided to talk to my neighbor about the poem I gave her (they basically opened their windowsand talked up and down to each other). I overheard the entire conversation, and she pretty much thought I was a good guy but made it clear she wasn't interested at all like that with anybody right now. She pretty much stopped talking to me after that, didn't even explain herself, just avoided me. I probably would have been more hurt if I hadn't heard the conversation though honestly. The neighbor was a great guy, good friend about it with me though. She and another guy were pretty much making out though by the end of the week. I think it gave her the courage to make up her mind about things."

rokit2space

Strip Tease Fail

"Tried to do a strip tease for my boyfriend. Stepped fully on his foot in heels, and kicked him fully across the face as a grand finale. I was so mortified that I cried. He was a jerk though, so in the long run, 10/10 would do again."

CandidNotCandied

Cat's Meow

​It wasn't a romantic gesture in my case. My girlfriend was upset that her cat died. So, I tried to cheer her up by making her laugh. She had this rubber popper thing. I put it on my forehead and got it stuck. Suuuppppeer stuck. Eventually, I pulled it off. Her laughing face turned to shock when she saw that the popper created a huge purple bruise right in the middle of my forehead. I had to go to work and high school with this huge purple splotch on my head for weeks. It did make her forget about her cat for a few minutes though.

-Prs_mira86

Rom-coms

Grand public or some rom-com movie-style gesture. I got broken up with after pulling one of those in college with my bf. As i grew older, I realized the negative implications of such overly romantic actions.

Though I'll admit, I do secretly hope to find at least one affectionate partner in the future.

-Sweetragnarok

People frequently confuse "grand" and "public" with stuff like this. "Grand" doesn't mean a proclamation on high about your undying love. "Grand" means something that is extremely meaningful.

I read about a guy who met his S/O someplace with bolts (can't remember exactly what. Maybe they were both working on cars or something at the time?) and so when he decided to propose he had a jeweler take a hex nut and turn it into a pair of rings. That is grand, IMO. Something that demonstrated an actual, substantial connection.

-WatcherOfStarryAbyss

Grandpa

Spent $100 on a toy train set to put around the tree for Christmas, since my wife's talked about how there used to be one at her long-deceased grandpa's house.

Me, being dense as a rock, thought she missed the train.

Nope, she misses her grandpa, and she just so happened to see him mostly on Christmas, where he had the train set up.

-Vulpine-Poltergeist

Barney

How I Met Your Mother Comedy GIF by LaffGiphy


The Naked Man. no story needed. most likely the worst possible thing that could happen happened.

-Professional-Newbie

So it's true: 2 out of 3.

-_motherofdoges

As a present for my then-boyfriend (now husband) for a significant event, I cooked all day and made lobster thermidor then chartered a night blue fishing trip. In our excitement, we both forgot he gets seasick if he loses the horizon.

Sun went down and he spent all 4 hours of trip chumming lobster into the ocean.

I didn't catch a bluefish.

-G0es2eleven

Labor pains

Made this huge plan to do all these things while my ex was giving birth to our son to keep her relaxed and keep things calm and smooth.

Did literally none of it. Stood there like an idiot in a total stupor, while she was like: "Hey, you gonna be ok?"

The nurse was even like: "If you're going to pass out just go, because we aren't going to be stepping over you."

-Theearthhasnoedges

Surprise?

Tried to arrange a surprise party. If you're going to do this, don't do it by pretending your forgot her birthday.

-capilot

Taking a stand

My husband had been working long hours, so I thought I would surprise him by putting together our new tv stand on my own.

I have never built anything by myself. I am terrible at interpreting directions for constructing things. But I had some really misplaced confidence in my abilities. Idk if I thought love and good intentions would guide me or some BS.

He got home late at night, and there were pieces of tv stand all through the living room. I was close to tears, had blisters on my hands, and was aggressively trying to get a screw to tighten that wouldn't budge. I didn't realize that I had stripped it. Our dog and cat could barely find any place to sit in the living room because of the mess I had made.

My husband was so upset and exasperated. He sat on the floor and had to finish putting it together. Kept asking me why I would do this when I know I'm not good at this stuff. Told him I was trying to do something nice and romantic. Lmao he was up for a while after that trying to fix my mistakes.

Ended up just making his night harder, so definitely not my best idea.

-PartyPoptart

I would have appreciated the effort

-I-amthegump

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley

Remember

"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt

Imagination

"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."

RedditbOiiiiiiiiii

"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."

monobarreller

Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."

– GTFOakaFOD

"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip

Yikes!

"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User

"Oh."

– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"

Sensations

Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."

PeachesnPain

Recovery

"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."

good_golly99

Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."

rayrayrayray

Free

The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."

TooReDTooHigh

This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.

Shocked

Giphy

"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."

Admirable_Buyer6528

The SOB

"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”

1-cupcake-at-a-time

Colors

"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"

Hannah_LL7

"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"

huntokarrr

The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."

Fluffy-Hotel-5184

Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."

Hot-Refrigerator6583

Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.

Shopping

"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.