Colombus wasn't the first to "discover" America, and none of the little chants mentioned the whole murderous rampagey bits.
But the ocean was BLUE, y'all. And that rhymes with TWO, like 1492. So here we are.
Reddit was asked:
"What's the most useless thing you learned in school?"
... and yeah ... it would be great if the educational system gave us something useful.
Mostly, it's stuff like this, though:
Ginger
Musik Violin GIF by PLAYMOBILGiphy"Probably that apparently Vivaldi's nickname was 'the red priest.' "
"We had to study for exams but our teacher decided to visit 3 separate websites and make us read about him."
- Kirby_ewe
"My music history professor taught us that 'Vivaldi is also known as the red priest. Because he was a COMMUNIST!? No, he just had red hair'."
- nekofastboy
"I fully support the "dive into knowledge about one famous person you want to write about", but not 50, and NOT people who's only accomplishment was to write a couple of poetry books that made my teacher weak in the knees. And of course, there was a 'wrong' way to interpret his works."
-Rubyhamster
Square Dancing Squid
"I haven't really found a use for square dancing."
- ToastAndASideOfToast
"Swing your partner round and round"
- SelectionMission3460
"Same. We learned it in my school cause it's the states dance. But I have never known anyone to square dance besides the TV people."
- USSCofficail
"You haven't found a use for square dancing YET. Just wait for a Squid Games situation."
- HolleighLujah
Disco Ball Demographics
House Music Dancing GIF by JustinGiphy"Kentucky creates 90% of U.S disco balls."
- No_School_4156
"Wow. I live in Kentucky but I never knew that... seems useless!"
- Black_Hole_Neptune
"Actually makes sense if you think about it."
"Disco balls are a niche item that you wouldn't expect to have a ton of different manufacturers, and Kentucky is centrally located so you can easily ship your balls to anywhere in the US quickly."
- fix-ur-acrostics
History Is A Mystery
"In public school we skimmed through the Vietnam war because there was little time left before testing and it wasn't gonna be on there that much."
" 'Long story short, we kinda lost that one...'."
- Senior20172
"It always bothered me when history stopped at WW2 and the rest was covered in a week"
- cheesefondue
"We skimmed over the civil rights and women's rights movements because our white, male, douche of a teacher wanted to spend more time on the civil war."
- MoobooMagoo
"It's been a long time, but I feel like US history is basically always taught as: American Revolution -> Civil War (aka, slavery) -> WW2 (aka, the Nazis), and we're done."
"If your teacher was a Boomer, they might spend more time on the 60s, civil rights, Vietnam. (aka, the glory years when they were a teen) But otherwise, history is basically the wars we WON, why we got in them, and the aftermath."
- TristanaRiggle
Not So Useless Uselessness
Sad Season 4 GIF by The OfficeGiphy"Haven't played the recorder very often."
- deede7
"Really? I play mine nearly every day. How do you make money when abroad if not playing Hot Cross Buns for 9 hours every day?"
- AnAquaticOwl
"No but it was my first significant taste of playing an instrument. This lead to 7 years of band class and lead to a great social past time in my adult life playing bass after that."
- Oclure
"Playing the recorder was probably way more useful than you think. Music theory and playing an instrument trains the ear and has positive effects on the brain and learning in general. Plus, it introduces kids to an activity they may or may not wish to pursue and, for those that do not wish it, they can definitively rule the interest out because they gave it a try already."
- Anianna
"Learning the recorder helped teach me to read music. I studied other instruments, and enjoyed them a LOT. Not that I was any good."
- KidsTheseDaysYknow
Tariff Trauma
"I know that the Hawley-Smoot tariff was the highest in history. No idea what the importance of that is, if it was good, bad, or indifferent."
- GrizzlyLawyer
"The importance is that some people believe it made the Great Depression a lot worse."
- ReadinII
"Actually you're only kinda right."
" 'The tariffs under the act, excluding duty-free imports, were the SECOND HIGHEST in United States history, exceeded by only the Tariff of 1828.[3] ' "
" 'The Act prompted retaliatory tariffs by affected states against the United States.[4] The Act and tariffs imposed by America's trading partners in retaliation were major factors of the reduction of American exports and imports by 67% during the Depression.[5] Economists and economic historians have a consensus view that the passage of the Smoot–Hawley Tariff worsened the effects of the Great Depression.[6]' "
- Soogoodok248
"Second highest? You mean I only learned one thing in school, and it was wrong?"
- GrizzlyLawyer
Opposite Effect
season 2 GIFGiphy"D.A.R.E."
- mrPandabot35
"I remember hearing a story about a 10 year old who called the cops on his parents because they smoked weed regularly. The police arrested both parents and charged them with felony possession."
"They were normal parents as far as we could tell. They just used to relax with a little Marijuana now and then."
"But the kid specifically quoted DARE when asked what led him to get his parents arrested. That's when I realized how awful what we were taught was."
- PhreedomPhighter
"Fun fact, it's been known for decades that D.A.R.E is a failure and leads to more drug usage. The first of these studies was in 1992."
- Pixel871
President Who?
"Being forced to memorize all the presidents in order. First and last names and years in office in chronological order."
"This sh*t can be googled in 2 seconds. We actually had a test on this where we were given a blank piece of paper and told to write them all down in the right order and this was actually a legit graded test."
- pintoftomatoes
"This is the one and only test I ever cheated on."
"5th grade. I’m so sorry Mr. Lee, but even at 10 years old and pre-internet, I thought this was a ridiculous waste of time."
- QuercusAgri
"Animaniacs practically helped me cheat on that one."
- operarose
Calculators And Pockets
Calculating Figure It Out GIFGiphy"That I wouldn't always have a calculator with me. Jokes on you.
- Fickle-Story-4854
"My dad once didn’t let my sister use a calculator on homework even though the teacher told everyone they needed to use a calculator 🤦♀️"
- Shadowweavers
"Yes, also heard that many times in school"
- Jarl_Fenrir
"Funny enough I did carry a tiny solar powered calculator meant to fit inside a check book for several years just to spite my obnoxious math teacher who said that all the time."
"Though I’ll admit it was useful to have before cellphones were ubiquitous."
- flying_fish69
Basic history
"Elementary school history. Most of it is either a lie/omission of key facts or just a completely random and useless fact."
- OkWalk9190
"The amount of Columbus sh*t I learned in elementary school..."
- Arxl
"What do you mean the pilgrims didn’t actually land on Plymouth Rock??"
- himewaridesu
"What pisses me off is that history is being repeated in later classes, higher schools. If you are going to teach me the same thing again, maybe just leave it now, and get back to me with the material when I'm old enough?"
- Jarl_Fenrir
"Yeah. I'm just getting into to high school and I've learned about the civil war like 5 times now. The only problem is that we never are taught anything after it, so all of my info post-civil war is based off of personal research."
- _Sterben-
We'll be honest, most of these answers clearly came from American schools.
Lots of our readers come from other countries, though - can you tell the rest of us some of the more useless things you've been taught?
Help us feel a bit better about ourselves.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
Reddit user TreatAlternative6908 asked:
"What’s something Gen Z isn’t ready to hear?"
and yeah ... some truth bombs were dropped. Thing is, we're not really certain any of this is stuff Gen Zers don't already know.
It's very possible they just don't care, which is honestly kind of admirable.
Expiration
simpson abe GIFGiphy"That one day you too will be outdated"
- yesiknowimsexy
"I used to be with 'it', but then they changed what 'it' was. Now what I'm with isn't 'it' anymore and what’s 'it' seems weird and scary. It'll happen to you!"
- heridfel37
"Oh this! Clothing style, vocabulary, everything of me is outdated. I'm the crotchety old man complaining about people whipping their phones out to twittledee twat this and that... and I'm only 35."
- Kuli24
Guilt-Free
"Just like harry potter/disney/anime/lol comic bacon culture millennials, you, too, will one day be an embarrassment in the eyes of teens and anyone else who isn't chronically online."
"Quit seeking the most moral and respectable of interests - just be f*cking cringe! Just enjoy sh*t even if it's not cool!"
"Be a decent person, but enjoy tiktok, or youtube gamers or sh*tty music or anime, or whatever."
"Nothing matters! Enjoy your hobbies and shed guilt from your guilty pleasures"
- puzzlekitty
"Best thing about growing up is enjoying hobbies and interests more openly, not giving a f*ck what others might think."
"As a bonus, you'll also meet people with shared interests since you're broadcasting instead of hiding it."
- MoistDitto
"💯 This is literally THE BEST thing about being an adult."
"I'm 45 and I like comic books and Halloween. And IDGAF who knows it because I'm happy when the pumpkin spice comes out!"
- Icelegion3000
Choose Wisely
"The choices you make today matter. You are not invincible."
- YourFatherHere1
"Especially bad health choices."
- Academic_Snow_7680
"Yes please take care of your teeth too."
"You don’t want to be 25 trying to get braces or fillings and have to pay it yourself. Things get really expensive and you’ll find ways to put that on the back burner. Which only makes it more costly"
- idk-though1
"I’m in my late 20s now and my friends who have neglected their health have night and day different living experiences compared to others who try to eat healthy and exercise."
"I’ve seen some friends who were fit and healthy leaving college turn into big unhealthy lazy slobs because of the poor choices they made."
- TGrady902
Yay For Average!
What Are You Celebrating Fred Armisen GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy"You don’t have to strive to be famous or to go viral. It’s perfectly ok to be average."
- AHotColdBrew
"Average is ok. Ok is average."
''You should be so lucky as to live an average life with a family, job, friends, home, etc."
- the-zoidberg
"Totally agree. Being average is underrated"
- SalmonellaPox
"This is actually very comforting advice."
"I feel like everyone my age is obsessed with being famous or making a name for ourselves and that causes a lot of anxiety for people. Especially when they don’t have a lot of followers or don’t 'make it' by a certain age."
"This is definitely something myself and a lot of people needed to hear."
- RedQueenoftheGay
Fashion
80S Dancing GIFGiphy"The 'cool' clothing you’re wearing now will look silly in five years."
- jessek
"But might be cool again in 30 years."
- chillin1066
"And silly in 32 years"
- CaptZombieHero
"I feel like the actual stuff that was in style didn't really come back, just the niche subculture stuff."
"Like Emo style is huge now but you're not seeing too many people walking around with cargo shorts and pink polos with the collars popped, or cartoon characters drawn like gangstas."
"Come to think of it, studded belts were almost universally seen as cool and those aren't really back either."
- Maninhartsford
Happy Is Good
"It's not uncool or irresponsible to be hopeful, joyful, gracious, or to happy with yourself."
"Take a break from the news and the internet if it's making you too anxious to really live. It's cliché, but I mean it! "
"Turn to your community and make change and relationships where you can see them in real life. Let yourself be inspired and don't listen to older grumps who want to yuck your yum just because the world keeps turning."
- Material_Marzipan302
"Lead with light and love."
- cynbad89
"As a gen z kid, I actually really needed to hear this. Thanks."
- CrazyComedyKid
Think
Will Ferrell Lol GIF by NBAGiphy"I’m in gen Z, and I would say that one of the most important lessons I’ve learned is that it’s okay to not be opinionated."
"It is far more beneficial to yourself and others if you take time to listen and understand multiple viewpoints instead of seeking to form a concrete opinion."
"Along those same lines, it is okay if your opinions change. That shows that you are growing and learning about what you value most in life."
- megstheace
"Yes people. You are not a hypocrite for changing your views."
- GrimKreeper098
"And you don't have to form an opinion right away."
"You can do the research, listen to those multiple viewpoints, and meditate on how you really feel about the issue. It seems that we are judged on how quickly we can make snap-judgements, which often leads to just conforming to public opinion out of fear."
- RasaraMoon
Positive Isn't Positive
"Toxic positivity isn't positive."
- Punkstarbabe
"Can you help me wrap my head around the idea of 'toxic positivity'."
- Amethoran
" ' Good vibes only '."
" 'But my dog just died and I'm worried about-' "
" 'GOOD VIBES ONLY '✌️"
- camp-void
" 'Good vibes only' people stunt emotional growth and healing. Not every experience is a good one. Things can be traumatic and we need to be honest about them to process and move forward, otherwise we stay stunted and in denial."
"That can make a person really unstable, especially when their perfect 'good vibes' world is shaken a bit."
" 'Good vibes only' people have decidedly bad vibes, honestly."
- [Reddit]
"Ironically, the exact same people that do this also make long virtue signaling posts about the importance of mental health."
"Like 'Don't be afraid to speak up, but also I'm going to bully and shame you if you do. Good vibes!' "
- Blahblkusoi
"THANK YOU as a member of the Gen Z I know too many people like this and they all think I’m a d*ck because I won’t go along with"
- SVWOH_L-3H_L
Hustle Culture
frustrated homer simpson GIFGiphy"Do not kill yourself a la hustle culture. Once you've damaged your mental and or physical health, it's very hard to get back to where you were."
- Educational-Candy-17
"So much this. I burned out three years ago, just at the beginning of COVID. In spite having the luxury of being able to rest as much as I needed to to recover, I am now only say 75% back to the energy levels I used to have, and it's much harder to just 'roll with the punches' in the way I used to."
"Do not do it to yourself."
- Jiktten
"I’m a millennial and this is the mentality my father planted on me. Mental health wasn’t a thing in his vocabulary."
- 1millionkarmagoal
"I've never seen anyone benefit from the hustle culture. Eventually they burn out and mad/sad how all that work didn't do sh*t to their lives and what they really wanted they never got."
"They eventually quit that job and find a better one in their mid 30s believing they ruined their life doing non-stop work in there 20s and ruining every relation they had in the process."
- ghigoli
Powerhouse
Secrets Of The Dead Biology GIFGiphy"The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell"
- nanorhyno
"And dissociation of BCL2 results in the formation of a BAX/BAK channel that releases Cyt-C from the mitochondria, which result in activation of the apoptotic pathway."
"Thus the mitochondria are the powerhouses of the cell as well as the bringer of destruction."
- mh078
"Knowledge is knowing mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell."
"Wisdom is knowing mitochondria ARE powerhouseS of the cell."
"Oh I’m sorry, let me rephrase so people can understand!"
"The commonly repeated phrase 'the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell' is wrong because ‘mitochondria’ is actually plural."
"So people who repeat this phrase while rolling their eyes saying that they didn’t learn anything useful in school are actually revealing that they didn’t pay enough attention and don’t know as much as they think they know!"
"Moral of the story, for further on-topic discussions, is this: Gen Z, you may think you know something, but it often will be wrong."
"Don’t get overconfident. Stay humble and curious because making assumptions will lead you astray in this world."
- ghostly-smoke
"You are my hero this day good person."
- MusicalAutist
Let's flip the script a little in the comments.
Now that Reddit has dropped some wisdom for Gen Z - what would Gen Z like to say back?
Sound off!
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
A "grave" mistake.
"No movie or tv show ever gets grave digging right."
"It would take you well passed sun up on your own."
" And they're digging Graves in a forest but never hit a big rock or a tree branch?"
"And seriously, you put a gun to my head and tell me to dig my own grave, I'm not doing it."
"I'm either swinging the shovel at you then lazily covering your body in leaves, or I'm getting shot and YOU can dig my damn grave."
"Win/win."- propagandavid
Is it really that easy?
"Most movies that feature hackers, especially 'Hackers'.- MidvalleyFreak
Not like any doctors I know...
"Grey's Anatomy."
"Their writers clearly never took the time to research medical code of conducts."
"In every single state in the U.S. those doctors would've all lost their licenses."
"Specially attendings f*cking residents."- PhillipLlerenas·
GiphyLost in translation?
"Different languages!"
" My auntie is speaks Indonesian and we were watching a movie and this one part a girl gets kidnapped and they start shouting at her in Indonesian."
"My auntie started laughing so hard and it turns out they were shouting 'spicy' at her and there was no context whatsoever."- phantomhiveo
Someone didn't read the recipe
"'The Princess Switch' on Netflix."
"There's a plot point where Vanessa Hudgens' enemy tries to sabotage her in a baking competition by cutting the wire to her stand mixer."
"Then Vanessa's character isn't able to make a fruit puree for her cake like she planned, and the competition judges point out that her puree could have been smoother."
"Who the f*ck would use a stand mixer to make a puree?"
"That is not what that is for."
"Use a blender or a food processor."
"Who wrote this?"- Melanie_Jellyfish
Where do you even begin?
"Fifty shades of grey, they have no clue how that works."- whipsyou
fifty shades of grey mine fsog GIFGiphyDefinitely "furious" about this one...
"'The Fast And the Furious' movies could've brushed up on some basic physics lessons.- Mona_Moans
They get such a bad rap.
"Ancient Aliens."- NobodyLikesMeAnymore
"They'll Never Take Our Freedom"... without some better research...
"Braveheart."- danebramaged01
Checkmate!
"I loved Code Geass but none of the writers clearly had ever played chess."- KoroSenseiTentacles
Chess GIF by NETFLIXGiphyOne imagines writers, producers and directors would be vigilant in ensuring that they were accurately depicting the worlds they were trying to convey.
Although, one doubts it’s the desire to see a completely accurate depiction of the Regency era that resulted in Bridgerton’s millions of viewers…
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
I've always hated rules implemented because of other's nonsense.
No Kissing
Giphy"Not at a workplace but at a summer camp (YMCA). Only children under the age of 9 were allowed on the playground due to the fact that 2 older kids (don’t know how old they were) were caught kissing on the playground."
Puppet007
Yes, creepy dolls...
"Only one personal item in your office. This was a financial institution so customers came into our offices. This was put in place because of one lady who had her office packed with trinkets including a handful of dolls. Yes, creepy dolls. Come and get your auto loan also don't worry we have some dolls here to witness your transaction."
luminescentbluedot
That went nowhere...
"A video game company I worked for provided free snacks and sodas. One Friday HR had just done a shopping run and was bringing in a truck load of junk food. One employee was caught sneaking a case of soda out of the parking lot. He wasn't fired or disciplined, it was just made public why the perk was ended. He quit shortly afterward and attempted to sue for a hostile work environment. That went nowhere."
DarrenEdwards
Pringles Please
"No popcorn. I work at a financial company and not once, but twice, someone burned microwave popcorn during end of day processing and caused the building evac. Every once in a while a new person is cooking some up and I just imagine the talking to they're about to get."
katrascythe
"We had this, but with microwave ramen. Someone managed to try to microwave it without putting water in. Twice."
_MaddAddam
Fun Over
Its Over GIFGiphy"We used to get a free beer after our shifts at a pizza restaurant I worked at, until the manager’s little brother got in a car accident after work (he ran a red light or something). That was fun while it lasted."
boi-juice
I thought rules were designed to make sense.
Ask First
Giphy"Well, I went to the Dr office the other day. At the bathroom there was a sign. It said 'Due to misuse of hand soap, you will have to request soap from front desk.' I'm weirded the f**k out. What the hell are they doing with the soap?! At the doctor's office?? I was just too afraid to ask."
Ok-Reporter-2688
Get a Manager...
"At a restaurant I worked at needed a manager override to make any price adjustments, remove items, or process certain cash transactions. This was done because another service found a way to discount their own meals or something. Anyways, this was a huge problem for everyone because there were only two managers in the whole restaurant, and often only one was on shift at a time."
"So when it would get really busy, which happened almost every night, it was next impossible to get a manager to help you out. Often times they'd scream at you for asking for help, meanwhile your tables are getting pissy because they've been sitting there for 15 minutes waiting for me to cash them out, and I can't do anything about it."
"So between my managers yelling at me and getting stiffed, the job because insanely stressful. I quickly put in my two weeks and got the f**k out."
14thCluelessbird
Confrontations
"We used to be able to pop in an ear bud at work with the offset being that we couldn't spend more than a few seconds here or there to switch podcasts or something. Naturally, some people took a mile and spent minutes on their phones. Since everyone was afraid of confronting these people, phones and earbuds were banned in work spaces altogether."
DYGTD
"OOPSIE"
"If you derail a train you have to get drug tested. In my time at that company members of my team caused 3 derailments. After the second one, the employee's official statement was 'oops, no further comment.' It was operator error and the guy owned up to it."
"After the third one, the guy driving hops out and screams 'OOPSIE.' He was being a real prick about the problem he just caused. So we ended up rewriting the drug testing policy to drug test the guy, and sure enough he failed. So then he was gone."
thedankbank1021
Damn Bob
Bill Murray Movie GIFGiphy"Former boss here. My total pet peeve was company wide memos about 'behavioral' problems that were really about a single employee. Not on my watch! Supervisor has a problem with “Bob”? F**king talk to Bob. That draft memo is not going out. I feel your pain y’all."
Rules are made to be broken. Especially stupid ones.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.