Going to Vegas brings a certain level of discretion, thanks to a brilliant marketing campaign from the early 2000s telling us what happens in Vegas must remain in Vegas. Your trips' nastiest bits aren't for social media. Instead, they'll be relegated to your memories, tucked away into the deep folds of your mind. You know...until the next time you go, and do something awful again.
Reddit user, u/MommmyDearest, wanted people to open and share the worst of the worst when they asked:
For those who have been to Las Vegas —What's your "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas" story?
All Part Of The Job
I warn that this isn't super exciting. I went to my sister's wedding in Vegas. I stayed in a hotel room with my dad.
He was asleep upstairs while I was downstairs playing blackjack. When I went upstairs, I was approached by two women offering to have a "good time"
I said no thanks, but they asked me why not. I just said "Oh I'm sharing a room"
They said "That's fine, we can do two people"
I said "Well, it's my dad"
They said "We're still fine with that"
Not What You Were Thinking
GiphyMan I have the lamest verision of this ever.
I had a job interview in Vegas, it was in Nov. or Dec. Two years back and I had put on some "winter weight." Didnt realize quiet how much. Dropped my portfolio with my resume and writing sample and sh-t walking to the interview.
Bent down to pick it up.
Tore my suit pants in the crotch, had to hold my portfolio awkwardly over my lap the whole interview. Didn't get the job.
Have never told that story, when everyone asked how it went I just said "fine" and then acted suprised when I didn't get the job.
So uh, I guess being so fat I tore my suit was a story that up until now stayed in Vegas.
Just...Close Your Eyes...
I've lived there for 18 years, but went away for college. I recently went back to Vegas for a school-sponsored event, meaning I got to experience it as a tourist. Saw a homeless person hooking up underneath a blanket, accidentally made eye contact. Worst half second of my life.
Untrue Love
Fell in love with a porn star, spent thursday through monday acting like a couple.
Felt different once we got to the real world.
Twofer
Its a tie for me
At the bar of a busy casino on the strip (the Flamingo) a very drunk (possibly on drugs) mountain survivalist from Idaho with a fu-manchu mustache pulled a gun on my wife and I because of how excited he was to show it off "in case he ran into trouble".
Saw a Go-go dancer fall off a table and horribly break her leg, she was (probably) on drugs and tried to get back up to dance more. It didn't work.
An Almost Tragic End
Spring break, 21 years old. Me and my best friend got blackout drunk and tried to get married in the hotel chapel cause it'd be funny. We texted our 4 other friends to come to the ceremony. 3 of them were also blackout drunk and asleep, but our 4th friend who didn't drink stopped us.
That's Why They Have No Smoking Rooms
I accidentally set the fire alarms off on the 16th floor of the flamingo cuz I rolled a 5 gram baby leg of bud I got from a dispensary and smoked it in our room. I was frantically trying everything to shut it off before security rolls through and makes me fan a pillow at it for 20 minutes and then left.
My arms hurt so bad after doing that but f-ck I was not trying to get smoke damage charges or some other bullsh-t. Dude pulled me down the hallway at the end and pointed to the stairwell and said "you're on the 16th floor dumbass no one is using the stairs smoke there."
Which I then did so dutifully.
No Dance Is Free
So my older brother got to start this tradition and I hope to carry it on when my son turns 21. All the guys in the family go to Vegas on 21st birthday. We live on the East Coast so it's not a quick car ride from CA.
My uncles, dad, grandpa, and brother were all there. Another memorable moment was seeing my dad walk to the ATM shaking his head. Apparently he thought that when the dancer wanted another dance he thought it was free? 11 years later he still hears jokes about ATMs. Christmas is fun. Grandpa is 87 and still going trucking along!
Lesson. Learned.
I bought edibles from a local dispensary. I quickly opened a rice crispy treat and ate the whole thing and prepared for a night of fun.
Well... During the ride on the roller coaster at New York New York, the edible kicked in full blast and left my head spinning. I ended up getting lost and walking 2 miles (I think) in the opposite direction of where I was staying.
I started to freak out, because I was high as a kite and was NOT enjoying myself anymore. I started to cry and have a panic attack until a guy dressed as Elmo helped me get back to my hotel.
Next morning, I woke up and read the packaging. It recommended breaking the rice crispy treat into multiple pieces, and NOT eating it whole. Lesson learned.
When The Truth Is Sadder Than Fiction
I suddenly got very bored hanging out with my friends at a club. I just wasn't feeling it. I abruptly stood up tossed my drink back and said "all right. I'm going to find something different to do."
I can be unpredictable and go harder than them usually. A couple of them were asking what I was doing and wondering if they should join me. I told them to enjoy the club. If sh-t got too crazy I'd text them.
Then I caught an Uber and went to Walmart for snacks, checked to see if they had any of the action figures I collect, and went back to my room and watched Netflix.
The next day they asked what I did and I didn't want to say "I looked for dolls and bought Doritos." And they took my slow response to mean I'd got up to something crazy. "Dammit I knew I should have went with you!"
They can never know.
Made up for it on Fremont the next night. We had crazy fun out there. Old Vegas is where it's at.A Tale For All Families
Oh boy. So about 6 months after I turned 21, my mom(43),brother (24) , grandma (oldish) and I flew down to Vegas. We of course got pretty drunk and made some friends in our hotel casino. Well. Apparently one of the guys had just came up from the Mexican border with some cocaine and other fun stuff.
I sh-t you not, this guy pulls out a f-cking ROCK from his damn sock and puts it on our hotel table. And that's what I remember of the story of how I did cocaine with my mom & brother in Vegas with some random drug pusher while grandma was asleep next door.
Seriously, Keep All Moms Out Of Vegas
Had some beers on Fremont street with my parents, aunt, uncle, and cousins. My mom was sober, but just to be funny she jumped on the fringe of this group of people dancing in a group (not a flash mob or anything, just some drunk people). She doesn't dance usually, mostly just pumping her hands up and down and jumping around (I love it, she's so funny to watch).
One guy turned around and started dancing with her, but he spanked her, and my mom took off like someone shot her in the ass, we all absolutely died laughing.
He Was Living His Best Life?
Walking down the boulevard and a guy jumps on a parked police car, whips his penis out, and starts pissing all over the windshield of the vehicle. Cops jump out of the car while trying to avoid piss and reach for their taser. The speed pisser finishes, jumps off the hood, and narrowly dodges the tase.
He then bolts across the street, but gets hit by a van on the opposite side of the road before he makes it all the way. I'm pretty certain his level of intoxication helped him survive being hit by that van.
Living The "What Happens Here" Lifestyle
I was an Elvis impersonator in one of those high class nudie shows.
I was skinny Elvis in the fat Elvis jumpsuit. And the guitar I used was a stage prop, weighed nothing and didn't make a noise anyone would consider music.
Something Left Behind...
I sharted myself badly in the middle of the Cosmopolitan Casino while trying to find a bathroom. I waddled the rest of the way to said bathroom and waited there for an hour until I was rescued by my brother who was all the way on the other side of the strip.
The underwear I was wearing at the time stayed in Vegas.
...And Something That Came Along
GiphyMet a drunk girl at a bar (I was also drunk). We start making out in the one narrow hallway in the bar, blocking people from both sides. I left her shortly after that to fly home.
I got her number and Turns out she lives a few towns over from me
5 years later and we got married last August.
EDIT: I thought I left "it" in Vegas. She just followed me home the day after I left and never let me go ;)
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Too many of us were told to grow up or that it would be wrong to continue to enjoy the things that made our childhoods worth remembering.
But now as adults, some have figured out that there's nothing wrong with enjoying a nice bowl of sugary cereal while watching those Saturday morning cartoons. Quite frankly, it feeds the soul.
Redditor iStoleurvalor asked:
"What is 'for kids' that you continue to thoroughly enjoy as an adult?"
Outdoor Playtime
"Playgrounds in general. Since becoming a dad, I can bring my kids to the playground and have fun with them on the slides, swings, monkey bars; most things."
"I wish there were public/free adult-sized playgrounds. It'd probably encourage us to get out a lot more. It feels like everything geared for adults nowadays charges admission, and it's not cheap."
- densetsu23
The All-Fours Climb
"Going up the stairs on all fours will always be fun."
- Curious-Kaylee
"I’m a huge advocate for climbing stairs on all fours, but I’m now imagining how horrifying it would be to see that in a public setting, lol (laughing out loud)."
- metallic_buttcheeks
"'LOOK OUT, KIDS! SHE'S COMING!'"
"*kids screaming*"
- KeepCalmSayRightOn
"I need to try this. But the only steps I regularly take are at work, lol (laughing out loud)."
- tittilizing
"I race up the stairs at work on all fours to assert dominance."
- JoshPlaysUltimate
Animated Movies as an Art Form
"Animated movies in general. I can still enjoy them. When I've had a rough day or if I'm just feeling down, I can put on something wholesome, funny, or nostalgic and it makes me feel better."
- catching_signals
"'Emperor's New Groove' is my favorite feel-good movie."
- Compulsive-Gremlin
Sticker Collections
"STICKERSSSSS."
- ObviouslyKatie
"F**K YES."
"Never enough stickers. I had a s**tty childhood (like most of us) but stickers always made me happy, especially the fuzzy ones. Suddenly understanding why I'm still bonkers for stickers."
- limeporcupine
Gotta Catch 'Em All
"Pokemon. Started with Red when I was five and haven't stopped since. Doubt I ever will. If anything, my enjoyment of Pokemon is becoming more childlike."
- The_Prezzy
In Cracker Form
"Goldfish. It's hard to resist when my niece is having them for a snack. I make a big show about me being a shark and eating them just so I can have some."
- Drew-
"I really thought you meant actual fish at first..."
Travelerofhighland86
"Fish are friends, not food."
- Phoneking13
A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood
"Mister Rogers' Neighborhood. Of course, it isn't solely for kids, as he made each episode with a mind towards parents watching them with their children, but he's so wholesome and kind, so deliberate and thoughtful with everything that he put on the show."
- Puddnhead_Wilson
"I’d never watched it before and my husband wanted to watch the Tom Hanks movie. But he wanted me to see the real Mister Rogers first. So there we sat, two adults over 30, watching episodes of Mister Rogers. And I loved it!"
- Ankylowright
Favorite Stuffies
"I remember a Reddit post from several years ago where this guy who was in the army or Marines or whatever gushed about his plush Magicarp. He even sent a picture of the Magicarp next to an automatic rifle."
- Mind101
"I'm almost 40 and not ashamed to say I still have my teddy bear, Wally, my mom made when I was two. His arms are lopsided, his ears are wonky, and he is made from upholstery fabric from a 70s couch cushion, but I love that dude."
"I did eight years in two branches of the Marines and Army and did three deployments, and you bet Wally was with me. Either stuffed in a pack or seabag, but he was there because I needed him."
- Jaymakk13
Gotta Love Disney
"Disney animated movies."
"I am a big, mean-looking 40-year-old man. I drove to work listening to the soundtrack to 'Moana.'"
- mkicon
"Second big, mean-looking 40-year-old man here. I may or may not have sobbed on my way to work while kind of singing the soundtrack to 'Encanto' this morning through my tears."
"I'm with you, bro."
- SHABDICE
Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea?
"Not me, but my 55-year-old dad still loves SpongeBob. He'll wake up on a Saturday morning and have his juice and breakfast while watching Spongebob."
- Hwetapple
"Dude, same. Almost every time I go over there, he's always watching SpongeBob. He recently found out he gets Boomerang on his Roku, so he's just been watching 'Tom & Jerry' and 'Loony Toons.'"
"I also love those cartoons so I'm definitely not talking s**t."
- Theren_Alister_XIII
Chocolate Milk, For Sure
"Chocolate Milk."
- Toy_Guy_in_MO
"Who says chocolate milk is only for kids?"
- transformers03
"Ice cold chocolate milk is amazing."
- SigridBaginnses
Skipping Down the Sidewalk
"Skipping. If you haven't skipped in a while, do it. You'll realize how much faster it is than walking, and how much more ground you cover."
- trx0x
Coloring
"Coloring."
"Not with craft paper and high-end pencils adult coloring, either."
"Nope. With a 'Moana' coloring book and the 64-count Crayola box."
- TheSquishyPaleDuke
They'll Never Go Out of Style
"I cannot stop making summer camp-style knotted friendship bracelets out of embroidery floss."
"It keeps my hands busy while I'm working/watching TV/traveling and I don't get sucked into my phone."
"Now I just leave piles of bracelets everywhere."
- andtheIToldYouSos
Breakfast of Champions
"Breakfast cereals... all of the fruity, sugar-filled candy-like cereals. It is totally my weekend treat. Nothing during the week."
"Fruity pebbles (Dino bites now. Post changed the recipe a while back) is totally my jam. Who doesn't like destroying the roof of their mouth on some Cap'n crunch?"
- hammerraptor
These are great reminders of some of the good things we had in our childhood, but it's an even more important lesson that there's no harm in doing something for our inner child every once in a while, maybe even every day.
People Who've Won A 'Lifetime Supply' Of Something Explain How Long It Actually Lasted Them
When a lifetime supply of something we like is offered in the form of a contest, it's safe to say that most of us would try our luck and enter the contest for a seemingly infinite amount of that desired thing.
But we have to wonder, when they say, "lifetime supply," do they mean a literal lifetime, or do they actually mean a conservative, well-rationed, short lifetime?
Redditor LordFrieza8789 asked:
"Redditors who have actually won a 'lifetime supply' of something, what was the supply you won? And how long did it actually last?"
Altoids and Burritos
"Not me, but my Grandpa won a lifetime supply of Altoids back in the early 2000s."
"They sent him a box with like 200 tins in it, and that was it. I remember when we went to his house, he gave me like a dozen of them."
"Also, when the Moe's opened up near me a couple of years back, my brother staked out overnight with some friends because the first 100 customers got a year's supply of burritos."
"They gave him a card that could be used for one free burrito a day for a year. I think he went every day for three weeks straight and hasn't gone back since, lol (laughing out loud)."
- CarsenAF
The Year of Pizza
"Not exactly lifetime, but I once won a 5000 euro one-year voucher at a pizza place, and it lasted the full year. I spent the last 75 euros on the very last day."
- nillekeks1
"That's a LOT of pizza."
- TheSarcasmChasm
"You have no idea. I ate every pizza they serve, every snack, everything on their menu at least five times."
"I was also invited to a lot of parties that year."
- nillekeks1
A Classic Swap
"My hometown has a minor league baseball team. I won a year’s supply of Pepsi from beating a mascot in a race at the ballpark when I was seven."
"I didn’t realize the prize was Pepsi until I won (I just wanted to meet the mascot, Scout!) and I hated soda as a kid."
"So when Scout handed me my first six-pack of Pepsi as my prize, I said, 'Well, that’ll last me the whole year because I won’t drink it,' and my parents forfeited my prize to the second place kid."
"The park gave me a t-shirt instead and a baseball frame for the picture I got with the mascot instead, so I think I came out on top."
- not_addictive
No More Hunger
"When I was a kid, I won a lifetime supply of meat from a large butcher shop in my hometown."
"My dad put my name in one day and a few weeks later we get a call telling us we won a custom BBQ pit and a monthly supply of meat and supplies for life."
"We got the pit a few days later, and every month we’d get a foam ice chest of various beef cuts, sausages, and steaks, a couple of dozen sodas, a bag of charcoal, lighter fluid, and a bag of whatever veggies they had around or something."
"We were really poor at the time, so this was exactly something that could help the family out in enormous ways. My dad would have a BBQ every weekend, sometimes several times a week."
"I remember sometime afterward, realizing that I hadn’t felt hunger in days or even weeks, and that was so unusual for me."
"For years, we continued to get the monthly supply. There was even one point when the amount of meat and sodas we got doubled. We were having a hard time keeping up, but that’s a good problem to have."
"I remember near the time I was going to high school, we got notified that the butcher shop got bought out by a larger national chain, and the parent company just wanted to cut us a check to end it all. We gladly accepted. The check was for like $10k or something like that."
"By that time, my parents had gone to school and got their degrees and got better-paying jobs, so the free supply of food was just a bonus."
"Looking back, that win helped us out a lot when we were poor. I can imagine the savings my parents gained from not having to buy as much food, which was scarce as it was. We became happier and a little fatter, as well."
- watabby
The Gift That Keeps on Giving
"I won a lifetime supply of printer paper from a Canadian retailer based on an internet contest with the purchase of a Konica Minolta."
"I won, and I realized quickly that I don't need that much paper. They were sending me two reams a month."
"I moved and never updated my shipping address, so someone out there is getting free paper."
- GhostLandsTramp
Free Flights
"Ryanair (a European budget airline) awarded its millionth passenger 'free flights for life.'"
"After nine years, they reneged on the deal, so she took them to court. The Judge awarded her 60,000 euros to buy her own flights (Her legal costs were more than three times that, but Ryanair had to pay those as well)."
"Given the relatively low cost of Ryanair flights, 60,000 euros will probably buy her at least six flights per year for the next 50 years."
- GrumpyOik
An Absolute Win-Win
"I won a year of free Choolaah. It’s a fast-casual Indian restaurant."
"They give a year of free food (via a coupon book with 52 cards for free meals) to the first 100 customers at any location. I saw that the line was short on the way to work and called everyone in the office to get in line."
"We had all our business meetings at Choolaah for a year, with the company paying for meals when people ran out of coupons, didn’t have them, or we hired anyone new."
"The food was perfect because if you ate vegan, paleo, gluten-free, or any combination there was something on the menu you could eat. We still use them for company catering because everyone likes the options."
- teacamelpyramid
In This Economy?
"I won free groceries for 'life' at my local grocery store in a raffle. They give me a digital $100 gift card once a month, which is wonderful. However, it doesn't even cover a week of groceries."
"It will end when the total given has reached $10,000. I've got about $4000 left."
- like_to
Party Time
"Not necessarily 'won,' but I bought a lifetime membership at one of my favorite nightclubs/concert venues early in the pandemic. They released a limited amount as a pandemic fundraiser and they went fast and will likely never do something like it again, so it feels a bit like I won."
"It came with free entry plus-one, coat check, and two drink tickets at every event at the venue (even sold-out ones) for life."
"A couple of years out, I’ve gotten more value than the cost, I’m still on the list for every event, and most of the staff there know me (partly cuz I’m there a lot and also cuz I tip well on those drink tickets). I’ll often just drop by for random events/artists I’d never heard of or dip in for a half hour at a sold-out event with a $50+ door cover just to say hello to some friends."
"I imagine someday the venue will close up shop and my lifetime membership will close with it."
- maddiewantsbagels
Good Manager Energy
"I took my kids to a pizza buffet place when they received a free kids meal coupon for good grades. The cashier mistakenly charged us for the meals."
"When the manager came out to correct the transaction, I said he could just return the coupon and not worry about it."
"He gave us an entire stack (about 50) of unused coupons that were attached together like a checkbook. We got free kids meals until they obviously reached the age limit."
- psgrue
Quantity Over Quality
"My parents did twice in a relatively short period of time. The first was at a fair when I was in high school. They advertised it as a lifetime supply of ice cream sandwiches."
"They ended up giving us 100 boxes all at once. Right there on a warm July day. My mom was only able to collect at the end of the day so there weren't even that many people to hand them out to."
"We got home and had about 60 left after giving away as much as possible and throwing out what didn't fit in our freezer."
"I played lots of sports so I ate a lot and my parents just said I could eat as much as I wanted any time I wanted. I went through 60 boxes in a couple of months. That was a good time but not so good for my weight."
"The second was when they bought an expensive microwave about a year later and won a five-year supply of microwave popcorn. Basically, the same thing happened."
"We got a huge box with like 200 packages and I was told to eat as much as I wanted."
"After living in a house that smelled like popcorn for a few weeks, my parents just threw the rest in the garbage."
- discostud1515
An Excellent Plan
"Not a lifetime supply but my aunt won a 60-second haul at our local grocery store, where you grab as much as you can in 60 seconds and it’s yours. There are obviously rules and limitations, no meat, dairy, or fresh goods."
"This woman took her arm and literally swiped out their entire aisle of coffee. She had a plan going in there, which I guess was coffee, dog food, paper towels, and toilet paper."
"Which honestly, that’s a good plan with the limits they had. Nobody in my family had to buy coffee for at least a year. (We all survive off coffee in my family.)"
- juelbaby
"The way I would DEMOLISH the spice aisle."
- f**k_you__shoresy
The Final Call
"This happened in the late '90s. A local bar ran a wet t-shirt contest where the girl who won would win a lifetime of free bar drinks at the bar. They also had cash prizes for second and third place. I don't remember how much, but it was a lot at the time."
"The result was a packed bar, tons of girls entered, and tons of guys spent money. My friend's girlfriend at the time, now his wife, won first place. She was stoked. He was excited."
"Within a couple of weeks, the building was condemned and torn down."
"Turns out the owners of the bar knew that the building was going to be condemned and just wanted to have one last party."
- pilot4hire70
Long Live the Cat
"18 years ago, we won a lifetime of vet visits for my cat."
"They expected to give it to someone with an old pet, not a new kitten."
"The cat’s still alive. The Vet Clinic has moved and rebranded four or five times, but they’re still honoring the award."
- aegis_526
A Beautiful Family Tradition
"My grandparents were gifted a lifetime subscription to 'Reader's Digest' as a wedding gift. They were offered that, or some other magazine that went out of business a decade later so they made the right call."
"Being a frugal family, that subscription was utilized fully. After Grandma and Grandpa were done with each issue, it would be passed along to siblings and their kids with this little round-robin thing they did (sharing photos and updates of what everyone was up to, passed along in a manilla envelope and when it came back to you, you remove your items and put new ones in)."
"They had been together for 62 years when Grandpa died, but RD honored the subscription an extra decade until Grandma passed."
"I forgot how much was paid for it, but I'm certain the gifter got their money's worth."
- Just_call_me_Marcia
While lifetime supplies may not always be all they're cracked up to be, some of these stories were incredibly wholesome and reminded us just how kind people can be.
Traveling the world can be a highly enlightening experience.
It opens us up to various cultures and customs that can only expand our wisdom of the capabilities of what people can achieve while also reminding us that we are all the same.
And while there are common practices that are shared by different nations, there are some things that Americans seem to excel at more than in other countries.
Curious to hear exmples of these, Redditor Tannerman1 asked:
"What does America do better than most countries?"
North America provides everything in abundance.
It's A-maize-ing
"Turning corn into things that are not corn."
– Aeekio
"When you have this much corn, what else do you do with it?"
– Beautiful-Page3135
"Being from Illinois please do something with all this corn."
– LordofTheFlagon
Maritime Airbase
"Aircraft carriers."
– Tubbaaoo
"I think the stat is something like the US has half of all the large carriers in the world right now. I do know in WW2 by the end of 1944 or 45 they had more escort carriers in service than most countries had naval ships commissioned in the country's entire history."
– FLABANGED
The Great Outdoors
"National parks, we also have amazing state parks and local parks."
"Before anyone starts no you having woods too isn't the same thing."
– Dull-Geologist-8204
"I’m not sure the very idea of a National Park would be a thing if not for ol Teddy Roosevelt, and the United States making them the thing they are."
– NicksAunt
Americans are very social people that have no qualms reaching out to a stranger.
Sometimes, that's a real good thing.
"Chatting, I’m from a European country where most people will avoid talking to stranger. But you can literally talk to anyone you met in the street in the US and most of them are willing to talk."
– FloorSad3826
Forming A Bond
"People in many parts of the US do talk. I’m from the US and I’m kind of introvert, but I’ve actually have grown to love it as I’ve gotten older. I’m a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood and I f'king love going to the grocery store. We have this awesome little actual grocery store and everyone talks to me. It’s basically the friendliest place I’ve ever been."
"There’s an old dude who just starts spouting off with trivia questions to anyone who will listen. I responded with the answer to one and he was like, “How the f'k did you know the answer to that?'”
“I’m a biologist.”
"He and I are basically best friends now."
– sloppy_biography
Three Guys Walk Into A Bar...
"I have had this experience. The only people who would talk in pubs in London were an Irishman, a Lebanese fellow, and the Nepalese bartender. There’s a joke in there somewhere. They were super cool cats, too. Oh, and the guy I chatted with in a bar in Paris, also Lebanese. None of the locals would speak more than a few words."
"Americans? We’ll talk half an hour to a wrong number."
"Side note: Does anybody know if everyone in Lebanon actually knows everybody else? It has now happened twice that I’ve met people on different continents who knew each other’s siblings."
– Lemur-Tacos-768
The Germany Connection
"I met a chatty lady in Germany once and when I told her she was a friendliest person I’d met in Germany she said very quickly: 'Oh, I’m not from here, I’m from Sweden.' Then we both laughed loudly and got the side eye from the Germans."
– Syd_Vicious3375
When it comes to certain American activities, it's no contest.
Just To Be Frank
"Hot dog eating contests"
– First_Ad5835
"I was going to say that the champion of the Nathan’s Famous contest is Japanese, but I looked it up & Joey Chestnut is the current reigning champion."
– sagitta_luminus
Americans Are Globally Recognized Due To...
"Dominate media and pop culture around the world. Nobody else comes close to the US in this regard."
– DougyTwoScoops
Accommodating Everyone
"I haven't been in a lot of countries, but from my limited experience, it's the Americans With Disabilities Act."
"I have a lot of complaints about it, but I can still say that using public transportation doesn't require me to walk down or up 40 steps, with the alternative being walking . 3 miles to find an elevator that can fit one person at a time and moves so slowly it's barely usable."
– oneofyrfencegrls
What You Didn't Know
"Ironically enough science. The US has more Nobel Prize winners of all other countries combined. And here's the key thing: many of those researchers were immigrants, or at least didn't have family going back to the Mayflower."
"Also this will really sound ironic: tolerance for other cultures. The US is among the most diverse nations in the world. The most iconic American cultural icons are ultimately a mix of local and international traditions. Asiatic countries are super duper racists, but we call them 'xenophobic.'"
"Agriculture. The US is a behemoth when it comes to agriculture and agriscience. The biggest issues is cultivating for logistics instead of taste. Those yield however come with technologies other nations find repugnant and so ban American imports to protect domestic agriculture."
"Charity. Americans as a whole donate more to charities than any other nation, and on a per capita basis as well. Most Americans probably see ads or donation boxes on a daily basis."
– WiryCatchphrase
I'm not sure if it's a good or bad thing but American establishments can dish out sizable portions of food for what dining patrons pay for.
Some entrees at restaurants are enough for sharing and ordering one main plate can be an economical option to allow room for a variety of other dishes–including dessert–without breaking the bank.
Go big, or go home, right?
The Best Responses If A Christian Claims 'You're Going To Hell' For Not Conforming With Their Beliefs
In spite of the separation of church and state and the fact that anyone should be able to freely practice any religion they choose, an ever-increasing number of far-right conservatives have used their Christian beliefs to espouse hatred and bigotry.
An all too common attack they utilize is telling someone who disagrees with them that they're "going to Hell."
Unfortunately, this prediction rarely leads people to quake in their boots as was intended.
And instead, they're the ones who often find themselves at a loss for words when the people they verbally attack have a comeback line all prepared.
"What's the best response to a Christian saying 'you're going to hell'?"
How Else Would They Know?
"'See you later!'"
"A skater boi dropped this one on holy rollers in college, the rest of us thought it was absolutely brilliant."- Ishidan01
"See you there then."- CuddleDemon04
He's Always Listening...
"It makes Jesus sad when you say that"- OperationBackground2
Can I You Show Me On A Map?
“'Where?'”
"Act like you’ve never heard of it—concede none of the authority or credibility they are used to having."
"'What do you mean, after I die—how can I go somewhere after I die, I’ll be dead?'"
"'My what?'"
"'Do you see these souls often, friend, is one in the room right now?'"- RidesThe7
Some People Have Heard Worse...
"Shrug, say 'Ok' , and walk away."
"You not caring riles them up even more."- ExRetribution
I See It Differently
"Yeah, well, that's just like, your opinion man."- EnvironmentalPack451
Animation Disagree GIF by Moving Picture ShowGiphyWhen Was The Last Time You Actually Read A Bible?
"Judge not, that you be not judged."
"For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you."
"Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?"
"Matthew 7, 1-3."- Aas-im-Aermel
“'Live a good life'."
"'If there are gods and they are just, then they will not care how devout you have been, but will welcome you based on the virtues you have lived by'."
"'If there are gods, but unjust, then you should not want to worship them'."
"'If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones'.― Marcus Aurelius."- Trygolds
"I thought God is the only judge of our soul?"
"Who are you to take his place?"
"It's better to attack them using their own teachings and beliefs that contradict their statement."- ZaiJianDada
Bible GIF by GlorifyAppGiphyTell Me Something I Don't Know...
"Aren't we all already here?"- YaMa-Ma
When The High Road Doesn't Seem To work...
"The Australian thing to say is "Get f*cked c*nt!"- IllTruck3645·
Give Them A Taste Of Their Own Medicine
"According to your God, so are you for doing his job and judging."- Reddit
Episode 5 Burn In Hell GIF by The SimpsonsGiphySay. Nothing...
"Stare at them blankly and don't hide your confusion."
"Don't say anything."
"Let them talk."
"They will keep talking, and the more they talk, the more uncomfortable they will make themselves."
"If they ask you any direct questions, don't answer them, just keep looking more and more puzzled."
"At the very most, shrug in total confusion."
"Do your best quizzical dog impression."
"They will give up and walk away, and regardless of how they try to seem outwardly, they will feel defeated, and question whether being an enormous a**hole is worth it."
"It may not last once they get back into their bubble of people who think that's a great way to act, but realistically, it's the only way to fight back."
"The minute you engage with them at all, you lose."
"Any comeback feeds into the victim complex inherently baked into Christianity."
"The only winning move is not to play."- PowermanFriendship
Will Ferrell Blank Stare GIFGiphyIt can be very easy to judge others.
But one can't help but stifle their laughter at those who judge others for not being as devoutly Christian as they are.
As they are all but literally going against the beliefs they are supposedly practicing.